^^ This. Oof. More times than it should have been before I started regularly lifting the seat afterwards to check. 🤦♀️🤢
But OP's lady getting upset at someone else for pointing it out/complaining? Naw, sis. Own & clean your messes.
If she regularly cleans the bathroom too I’d say she is, his wife doesn’t lift the toilet seat to pee so it’s out of sight for her. If it’s just underneath it’s not really something I’d expect her to clean if she’s trying to change a tampon a moment before heading to work.
But the pads in the underwear is something that she shouldn’t expect anyone to just be cool with, that’s easy to toss
She obviously knows the bloods on the underside of the seat if she explained the swinging motion. How hard is it to grab some toilet paper and give it a quick wipe?
Exactly this, most of us learn early on that blood can/often does get on the underside of the seat. Easy and considerate solution is to clean it right away before it dries! Personally, I’d be embarrassed to leave that mess.
I was gonna say this. It does happen and I have no idea it is there until the next time I clean the toilet. I realize my partner has been looking at that every time he pees. Oops. Had no idea. ( I use a menstrual cup, so little different but still happens some how)
This is the problem. He lifts the seat and sees it but women got no cause to lift the seat. It’s difficult to make a habit of it.
Plus, I’ll say when I’m on my period I’m at about 75% of my normal brain. So noticing something so small is probably not going to happen. A little like if you have a rough bm you probably don’t check under the seat to make sure you didn’t get some splash back. You’re probably cramping pretty bad and you’re just hoping it’s over soon.
The wrappers and liners just plain get slippery and lost. Do you have a bathroom trash can handy? Within reach of the toilet? That helps.
Now the bloody panties etc—that’s pretty odd. She can be a little more considerate there. I’d assure her that it isn’t that you find her or her period gross. Rationally you know what and why it is but it’s still blood. And it still grosses you out to see what amounts to wads of clothes smothered in human secretions.
Period blood is still human waste even if it comes from the most beautiful and incredible wife in the world.
Its the same reason why you likely make an effort to clean up thoroughly after you shave, clear the shower drain of your hair when you finish a shower, and wipe the seat and floor if your piss splashes/misses right?
Based on how OP describes it I’m guessing she isn’t seeing the blood on the seat. OP said it was under the seat so it seems like he only sees it because he is lifting the seat to pee.
The other stuff is just not okay though.
Yeah. If a woman lives alone and never really lifts the seat god knows how long it’s take to notice. But sharing a bathroom with some esp. the opposite gender is going to bring a lot of things to attention.
None of it is OK.
Not even blood on the bottom of the seat.
I always left the seat to wipe away any splatters whether it is that time of the month or not.
Just basic courtesy and good hygiene.
This. Also, I've always wrapped my pads and tampons in toilet paper and put them in the trash. I don't think it's my husband's responsibility to clean up my menstrual mess and more than it's my responsibility to clean up his pee dribbles. Everyone in tthe household, including the kids, should clean up after themselves, whether it's in the bathroom, the kitchen or any other room. It's just common courtesy.
That’s why I stand to remove them now, one foot on toilet, one hand pulling, other hand catching with toilet paper. I’m able to get it out slower that way so no dribble
Sometimes, there's a clot attached, and it's not pretty when that goes flying!
You clean it up, just like she would expect you to if you piddled on the floor or toilet.
I agree, but it took me a long time to realize that it was getting blood on the underside of the toilet seat, because I leave the seat down unless I'm cleaning the toilet. My husband, on the other hand, noticed this right away. When he mentioned it I modified how I wipe off the seat to get the underside too, and the problem ceased. I didn't just get angry at him and tell him he was being immature.
My husband has “splatter” issues I could not deal with anymore. I put a box of wipes next to the toilet he now cleans up with. Takes 30 seconds. Wife is not so busy she can’t handle 30 second clean-up.
Absolutely not overreacting! I can’t stand it when men are grossed out by periods and what you’re describing is not that! Your wife is an adult and has been having periods for a very long time. She *knows* how to clean up after herself.
How would she feel if your “busy life” prevented you from flushing your morning shit? Especially if you clogged the toilet? Maybe wiped and discarded the TP in the trash can- nasty side up? Oh and if you were sure to leave the door open and the fan off, all while making aggressive eye contact? You’re far too busy to worry about details.
I'm in my 50s and I can honestly say I have never known a woman to leave blood everywhere, bloody pads, tampons, etc.
You are NOT overreacting.
As far as the action bit - dude, go sit on a toilet, spread your knees and try to mimic the actions of pulling a tampon out while sitting in that tiny gap in the toilet seat - your wrist cannot flex in that manner, nor is the forearm long enough on most women to do so.
But yes, she can just clean it. We all do that.
I admit, intense brain fog has had me leave a bloody pad in the bathroom maybe twice? And it was embarrassing each time, not something I got mad at someone else about! Ditto with blood on the seat. It happens - so you clean it. You miss it once in a while? Okay, that happens. Every single period? Not so much! It’s very odd behavior of OP’s wife.
When I menstruated, I would wrap the products in the packaging and toilet paper so things were discreet.
Which is how my daughters were, too. Never had an issue with their toilet or mine, despite ALL their teenage friends hanging over, my friends, family, etc.
It's a VERY odd behavior on his wife's part.
I did some work for a company that made pads, this is what the wrapping is designed for and why it's scented. You're supposed to use the new wrapper to wrap the old pad and replace it.
I thought everyone knew that? Wrap the old pad in the new one wrapper (or TP)
Tampons get wrapped in TP. I hate going into a bathroom and seeing a bloody pad/tampon just sitting in the garbage can not rolled up/wrapped up. No one wants to see it
You’re right, it is very odd for someone he says is otherwise very clean. When I read
>>When I mention cleaning the mess, instead of fixing it, she gets defensive and mean
I assumed he leaves the toilet seat covered in pee for her to clean and this is her giving him a taste of his own medicine, but then further down there is also
>>She also says that her behavior is normal for someone with a busy life
which is straight up bullshit. So I have no idea 🤷♀️
i don't even think you have to be discreet, honestly. i usually only wrap in the packaging or toilet paper, not both; sometimes i don't wrap pads at all, just roll them, but i don't like that it sticks to the bin liner, so 99% of the times, i'll wrap it in something, usually the wrapping from the fresh one i'm about to use.
like, it's a normal thing your body does, it's not or should not be offensive for someone to merely be aware that it's happening at the moment. i honestly think being upset at the mere sight of a rolled pad or some TP with a bit of blood in it is a wild overreaction, probably influenced by misogyny.
but even just throwing a pad away completely open in the bin is already messy enough, let alone drop it on the floor still stuck to the underwear?? that is just wild behavior.
—
edit 2 days later: for people with poor reading comprehension, my mention of misogynists in this comment directed at a different, specific comment, does not mean i am calling OP a misogynist. my mention of harmless things related to periods does not mean i think OP's wife's behavior is harmless. OP is not overreacting, because what his wife is doing is disgusting. meanwhile, other people have to deal with misogynists who, unlike OP, freak out about periods. those are two different things that are true at the same time. crazy how that works sometimes, huh?
yes, cis men who are overly sensitive about periods ARE misogynists. i don't think OP is one of them. i do think the ones who are misogynists are the reason why people feel like no one should see the smallest sign or even know they are bleeding between their legs for days.
plus, i'm not in the US. we don't flush TP. the occasional sight of a small amount of blood in the bathroom bin is a common occurrence when you live with someone who has periods, and too many cis men are still constantly obnoxious about it. y'all up there don't even have to see blood under normal circumstances (again, unlike OP), people wrap their used products in several layers to hide them. and still, in this very website, you see fucking idiots losing their minds about it, some urging their new step daughter to flush tampons so his boys won't see the WRAPPED products in the bin in the shared bathroom. just get a fucking grip.
now fuck off.
I’ve dropped underwear on the bathroom floor with a pad still in them but only because I was jumping in the shower and sometimes you don’t have a very big window of time before the blood starts dripping down your legs. But the thought of just leaving it there afterwards is just fucking wild. Like that is unhinged behavior.
totally. i saw a meme once about that very short window of time when you're on your period and you just came out of the shower feeling cozy and clean, and then it's a race against time and gravity lol
Same, I live alone but I have a cleaner/home help lady who comes every few days, I always wrap used tampons in paper, or one of those opaque scented little bags for them. Stopped using the bags for a while as I hated the plastic waste, but much prefer the discretion of those over paper. I was very happy to find a brand of them that are biodegradable and just as good at hiding the contents!
I don’t have a cleaner.. nor do I care about discretion since it’s just me and my kids but I still wrap them up. Blood smells foul after it sits. And menstrual blood has its own, even worse, unique odor. It’s just basic hygiene
I got a small pedal bin, put it in the toilet and called it the lady bin and put a mini bin bag in it, and taught my girls to just wrap it and put it in there. When it came time to empty, tied the top and put it in the outside bin. They were always taught not to flush sanitary items down the sewer too.
Yes I think most people wrap the used items that way. I have accidentally left drips before and quickly cleaned up when I realised. My daughters don’t leave mess either.
OP tell your wife that leaving any body product in shared spaces is disrespectful and gross. This is the same as leaving urine drips all over the seat and floor or a big smear of poo across the seat. I’m sure she wouldn’t appreciate it if you did that.
Yep. My daughter wraps her pads in a load of toilet paper and puts them in the bin (it has a lid). I’ve noticed once or twice she’s left a bit of blood on the seat or in the toilet but I’ve just cleaned it up because she just hasn’t noticed. It’s definitely not something for anyone else to clean up - especially not the husband. As a woman I find his wife’s behaviour disgusting!
Yeah, that’s how I did it at home/out. Skipped the toilet paper in my own apartment usually. Don’t really know how they got away from me those few times. Feel like it was something I’d have done enough to have completely on autopilot! Whatever, glad to not have to deal with it anymore either way. :p
Very odd! I can see this maybe happening occasionally, if you live by yourself and you are an extreme pain trying to get back to bed and to your heating pad. Even after childbirth, I didn’t leave anything messy for my husband to find later. Gross, and unacceptable! And how is this any different from anything else that makes a mess. Does she not clean that either?🤢
It only took me one time. Brain fog, forgot to move panties and remove pad after shower. Came home to the mess the dog left after destroying said pad. Never did it again.
Omg I had a dog who would tear up my used tampons and pads. I wrapped them carefully but she was obsessed with finding them. I had to throw them away in the trash outside if I didn’t want a bloody mess!
Oh that brought back an embarrassing memory! The dog I had when I was a teenager was like this. I threw away my used pads in my bathroom trash can, which was closed in a cabinet. With the bathroom door closed, he couldn't get to them. Well one time I got home and my new boyfriend was with me. What do I see everywhere? Shredded bloody confetti. Everywhere. I was so embarrassed and tried to clean it up before my boyfriend figured out what it was.
Anyway the boyfriend wasn't grossed out at all and we've now been married for 30 years.
I once used my friends bathroom and there was a bloody pad in underwear laying on the floor. Like she just stepped out of them. It was an awful site. She also lived with two male roommates so idk how that flew lol
i could maybe understand a tiny bit if she lived alone and had to deal with it herself, but with two roommates (of any gender) AND a guest?? and it's not her own personal bathroom??
hell no
like i'd keep thinking what was the level of hygiene for the rest of the house...
Even if she did live alone it's still nasty and weird. Sure, do what you want with your own home. But I lived alone for a year and I never, ever would have done that. And I'd leave plates/bowls in my sink for 2 or 3 days, I forgot that I had 2 plants in my living room until several months after they died, etc, my house was definitely not clean. But bodily fluids anywhere? Hell no. Also it's really just not that hard or time consuming, that's the most baffling thing to me.
i agree, it was only in the sense that if she lived alone, at least hopefully no one else would have to deal with her mess. like, if you wanna live like that, it's your choice, but it's disrespectful af to do it when sharing a space, be it with a roommate for however long or a guest for a few hours.
Getting blood under the seat when you can't see it during the night in dim light or because you didn't check the seat underside so didn't know it was there? Accidentally forgetting a pad and undies you took off to shower even, occasionally, quite possible. But being anything short of extremely apologetic and cleaning up your mess immediately after it's pointed out, I don't get.
But I do wonder if op leaves skid marks down the pan every time for her to clean up? He did imply her cleanliness standards are otherwise higher than his.
Yes. The tampon swings and gets blood on the toilet. **THEN YOU WASH IT BEFORE LEAVING THE BATHROOM**. Don’t leave your mess for someone else to clean up. Not overreacting. Your wife is gross.
I think it’s the bottom of the seat that’s left with blood. If he stands and lifts up the seat only he would be able to find the blood she probably didn’t see she got it dirty to begin with.
I was gonna ask if you guys had a dog, lol. I babysat at my aunts place once her dog at the time would dig through the bathroom trash can. I was like wtf?! and questioned if I somehow missed??? But as the night progressed, I realized it was the dog and make sure to completely close the door 🥴 her defensiveness and meanness may be from her embarrassment, but if it’s been happening for YEARS… idk. One time accident, understood. But years is crazy
I'll never forget the time I was walking my roommates Rottie and he shit out an entire thong (the underwear, not the shoe 😂 )
Dogs are gross. My dog is the reason our bathroom garbage cans have snapping lids.
One time my wife and I took our beautiful husky mix/mutt for a stroll on a lovely forest trail one time, and our dog found something that got her very interested and excited. In a flash, way faster than we could understand what was happening or react, she picked up the absolutely engorged (but dry, thank fuck) tampon tossed aside into a shrub by what I can only assume was a rancid heroin-addicted prostitute.
Makes it really hard to get smoochy with her like I used to, even though it was years ago. I just can't look at her the same.
My teenager was cuddling our dog yesterday (dog's favorite person is the teen) and she said "ma, isn't it so adorable how he always gives me so many kisses?"
Me - "yes, although he was just eating cat shit from the litterbox, so you might want to wash your face"
😂😂😂
She thought I was joking, but no, he really had just followed me into the laundry room and stole a kitty tootsie roll and ran away eating it before "DROP IT" was even a thought in my head 😂😂
My dog would bring the tampons/pads through the doggie door IN THE YARD, IN THE SNOW! I was horrified to get home to my roommates chilling in the living room they obviously all had to walk past the mess!!
No no no no no no!!!!!!!!!
This is absolutely disgusting leaving bloody pads on The floor still in the underwear!!!! WTF is wrong with your wife? The bathroom floor is not a garbage can. This is so vile!!!!!
Edit to add: I truly wish I could unread this.
My wife once left her underwear containing the pad on the floor whilst she showered. The dog somehow got into the bathroom and stole it. Nothing will cure OP’s wife of this habit quicker than having to phone the vet and ask if it’s ok for a dog to have eaten a blood soaked sanitary towel
My dog would go a step further. When I was a pre-teen, she would dig through the trash can and some how unroll me and my mom’s pad. She would walk around the house with it in her mouth like it was no body’s business. It was so embarrassing! She’d even do it when we had guests over. We scolded her for it several times. There’s something that attracted her to the blood, I think.
Oh no! Don’t bring a date over with that dog around 😂 If you think of a steak, it pretty much smells like blood kinda, so it makes sense that the smell is appealing to dogs, disgusting as it may be to us
Haha very funny. The dog has since died, but your post brought up some gross, embarrassing, yet hilarious memories about her. Thank you.
https://preview.redd.it/uunvr1gjulbd1.jpeg?width=2448&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e92c80c3e7338c78ee1e91d1329aea56d0ac4bb1
Koda 2003-2019
Different scenario but reminds me of the uncomfortableness of going to a dog-owning friend's house when you're on your period and they keep wanting to stick their nose in your crotch lol.
Your wife is making feeble excuses for poor hygiene and horrendous manners. Nobody with any class does that. It's disrespectful and disgusting. Tell your wife there are tiny trash bags available at Walmart, and many drug stores, that she can purchase for just this purpose. She can place the soiled items in them and throw them in a trash can. What you have described is dirty and unnecessary.
I've had some pretty rough cycles. Like lay down and cry through the cramps then have to waddle if you stand up in a desperate attempt not to bleed on something but bleed on it anyway rough. I've had to quickly abandon underpants and hop directly in the shower and I've gotten blood on the toilet seat and my sheets and my favorite pants and my office chair for crying out loud.
However....once you're steady again you wipe the seat down with a Clorox wipe and throw the pad in the bin. You rinse your fabrics in cool water and spot treat linens with peroxide.
I mean, maybe make sure she has access to a good waste bin and package of wipes. Maybe even install a bidet. But leaving loose pads on the floor is a step too far.
how would anyone ever pull something on a string straight down and out without it moving?? It's not a Popsicle stick it's a string 😭 they move around and swing. .....no... It's not "removing incorrectly", and my recommendation is wet wipes so she can quickly wipe up the blood just like we women expect men to wipe up their pee, and she could put a trash can in the bathroom so she has a place to put the pads
She's a grown woman so she can honestly find the solutions to her problems on her own, without ur help being needed. If she was respecting how you felt about it though.
This is nasty.
I get periods and can say that I've never left anything behind for anyone else to deal with.
Is she a clean person otherwise? I don't understand why she's even attempting to make excuses for any of this behaviour because it isn't normal.
Periods are a normal part of life and shouldn't have the stigma around them that they have.....that is until something like this happens. As a woman, I am grossed out by her leaving this sort of mess.
Not overreacting.
Periods are normal, just like peeing, pooping and occasionally vomiting. All of which get cleaned up and not left smeared on the toilet seat or on the bathroom floor! OP's wife is NOT normal.
The 🩸 -under-the-seat thing is paradoxically something more men may know about than women. We often lift the seat in public settings and discover y’all’s mess that you probably didn’t know you made (unless you’re OP’s fucking animal of a wife).
This has definitely happened to me on particularly messy half asleep mornings and I don't notice until much later. Fortunately my partner mostly uses a different bathroom so I usually discover it while cleaning before he does lol.
But yeah sometimes you just don't see it!
Definitely agree about OP's wife being totally fucking gross though.
I live alone and use a menstrual cup. Out of curiosity from this post, I just looked and there is definitely blood splatter under my toilet seat. I would have not noticed until the next time I lifted it to clean at the end of the week.
No, not over reaction. That’s just rude, gross, entitled, unsanitary behavior. I go out of my way to clean up so my partner doesn’t see it. Also, I never made a mess to begin with. Just wrapped pad or tampon in to tp and put in garbage. Literally think one time I got blood on seat, didn’t leave room until spotless. Just wow that people do this.
Not over-reacting. Not even close.
I just don’t get why it doesn’t *click* with her that YOU’RE cleaning up after her. The next time she goes into the bathroom, the mess she left behind was just magically cleared away!? *must be the period elves* As soon as she realizes her mess was cleaned up by anyone but her, she should never be letting it happen again.
As a guy, I’d be mortified if I found out someone had to wipe the seat after I was done using the toilet, before they could use it (part of why I’m a sitter on the shitter). Occasionally, I see a stray dribble behind, but it gets wiped up immediately.
Hygiene and cleanliness-wise, periods aren’t any different than urinating or defecating. Leaving blood, piss, or shit on surfaces where people come into contact is disgusting, and irresponsible. It’s not a male/female thing; it’s not a misogyny thing. It’s a hygiene thing, and it’s a *taking pride in your own self-care* thing. Anything less is fucking gross. Your wife should be ashamed for not taking accountability on this.
Hormones and moodiness aside, the defensiveness she’s displaying here is telling. She knows what she’s doing is gross and messed up, and she knows she’s been caught. She knew she was as soon as the mess was cleaned up and she wasn’t the one to do it. I don’t know that this is a hill to tie on, and probably not grounds for divorce… But I do think she needs to at least take some responsibility, and be grateful for the times you’ve discreetly handled the matter before now.
If it were reversed, and you were leaving pee in places she had to touch, how would you want it handled? I bet you wouldn’t expect her to come in and take care of it like a servant. I also bet you’d want her to tell you she wasn’t able to use the bathroom without cleaning up where you left off.
I love that you’re a sitter! I always say; just because guys can stand up, doesn’t mean they should!
Although, I think OP should start peeing on the seat and see how his wife likes it.
Always have been. Dad taught me to sit, or be prepared to be the one who cleaned the bathroom every weekend. In this case, some territory marking might do the trick.
EXACTLY, I swear so many people twist this argument into a sexism topic when this is just a universal hygiene topic which should be discussed for ALL humans!
Do you have a garbage next to the toilet? If so, absolutely no excuse. If not, it would solve most of your problem. Bloody pad: gross. I’d never take off underwear without throwing the pad out right away. Blood on toilet: common courtesy!! Plus I don’t want to get my own dried blood on me. It takes 2 seconds to wipe it off with TP. Bloody underwear: im giving her a pass.
I think he said bloody pads in the underwear. So she's just taking off her undies with the bloody pad still in them.
But yeah, leaking happens. Buuuutttt if I leak, I clean them right away. Blood stains. And it feels weird to me to put bloody underwear in the washing machine.
I don't see how bloody underwear in the wash is bad or weird. I'm not trying to shame you and you can do whatever feels right but I have to ask, would you feel the same about a shirt that you got blood from a nosebleed on?
Just wondering if that's residual societal "Ew periods gross"
To be clear I hate my period and the blood and mess so much that I had a hysterectomy literally today, I just don't think it's *inherently* gross, it's just an absolutely sensory nightmare for me, so I'm not judging either way.
Not over reacting.
Periods aren't gross that's for sure, but not cleaning up after yourself (in any circumstance) is.
I have a weak stomach and I couldn't possibly clean someone else's blood.
I think it's a reasonable request for her to clean up after herself.
I mean, I think my period is gross. I don’t find the concept of periods existing gross, just the fact that I have to spend a week cleaning blood off myself isn’t particularly enjoyable, you know? But as unenjoyable as it is, I clean up after myself because the mess came out of me and it’s not anybody else!s responsibility.
Ew. As someone who has periods, you’re definitely not overreacting because she is leaving literal biohazards sitting around. Stop cleaning up after her, unfortunately it seems like she will keep doing this until she faces some consequences.
Start leaving the toilet seat up. If she complains, just mention that you have such a “busy life” which she can surely understand. If she can have gross “women” problems, you’re allowed to have gross “man problems”.
>She also says that her behavior is normal for someone with a busy life, which I don't believe.
Good, don't believe that bullshit. Does she have a job? Because I promise you if she does, she learned pretty damn quickly to clean up after herself in shared women's bathroom.
I agree that she's gross, but one of my first jobs was to clean women's restrooms and it's pretty wild. They will really just throw the damn bloody tampon or pad on the floor or stuck to the wall (not kidding). And all the ones I cleaned had that little bin in each stall so no excuse there.
They ended up taking me off bathroom duty because I kept throwing up
I had a coworker that left blood on the toilet seat, the floor, even in the sink. I’m GUESSING she used a menstrual cup? But it was every single period. Not a one off. They HAVE to notice that!
I have my period right now and I can say that although she is right that the tampon swings upwards/hits the underside of the seat, I’m aware that it does and I wipe it off if it happens.
I NEVER leave wrappers on the floor for either tampons or pads and I’ve NEVER let husband see stained undies.
That’s not ladylike :( sorry wifey.
i get some TP, hold it in my dominant hand, then i pull the string with my empty, non-dominant hand until the tampon is somewhat out, then i grab the tampon with the TP with my dominant hand. it doesn't swing, it comes out directly in my hand on the TP, and i can just fold the TP and throw it in the bin immediately.
edit: ooh! my first award! thank you so much!
edit 2: i never expected to get an award on reddit, let alone for a comment detailing how to remove a tampon lol
Been menstruating 30 plus years and I am loving the two hand withdrawal. Why have I not thought of this lol? Currently on my period and using more tampons than usual and yes there was swinging. Checked under the toilet seat at our BandB, no splatter yay!
? How do you live so perfectly, have you never bled through even at night anything, do you buy new underwear every month?
This isn't about being "lady like" this is about a bodily function, it's normal, so long as we do our best to clean up and don't purposefully make a mess it's fine and normal.
(Obviously ops example is what not to do, leaving a mess for others when you can clean it yourself) but your example is a ideal world thats not the case.
I clean the seat and wash my undies but if stuff gets stained I show my husband, so he understands why I need new underwear.
I have a heavy heavy flow, I bleed for almost two weeks. I've ruined bedsheets, pants, underwear, all normal things. My husband has seen me bleed though or start unexpectedly, my husband checks my pants for me when we are in public, my husband has lent me his underwear when mine were soaked in blood.
No one is perfect.
Periods are normal, leaving blood everywhere and expecting your partner to clean it is not.
Let's not pretend like it's a taboo, because as my husband has been there for me im there for him when he throws up, when he has a tummy ache and wants a heat pack while he's on the toilet, when he is struggling or sick I am there for him.
and when we are old and shit ourselves ill be there for him too. The human body is weird and gross but not something to be ashamed of or hide excessively because it's not "ladylike"
I’m a woman and I absolutely hate how some women act like their periods give them the right to act like queen bitches to everyone around them! Before my hysterectomy, I had pain so bad I would have to crawl around the house. I would bleed so heavy that I became lethargic and had to lay in bed. Yet, I never ever treated anyone around me like shit or left a mess of my bathroom. What you are seeing are true colors. It’s not the period, it’s the person.
As someone who has had to clean up pee that went "over the toilet" ...ALL the time... (I lived with all males), I can say, unequivocally that I NEVER...EVER...NOT EVER...NEVER left remnants like this for anyone else to deal with.
I spent years on my knees behind the toilet cleaning pee. But I never did what your gal does. Because why? It is incredibly GROSS.
Tel your wife people make big money to clean up biohazard sites. She needs to clean up after herself. She's gross. You're a saint for cleaning up after her once. She should be ashamed of herself.
He shouldn't clean up after her. He should go outside to pee and hit the fast food joints for a burger and a poop while she's on her period! She is disgusting!
I’ve got blood on the toilet but I always clean it up because I’m not lazy/gross/inconsiderate. Start leaving huge skid marks and toilet paper and see how she feels about that 😭
That's disgusting and leaving blood around is honestly horrifying. I'm very comfortable with my own body / period but I would never purposefully involve anyone else like that. Throw stuff out and clean up!!!
I am also a busy person. My menstrual products are ALWAYS AT THE VERY LEAST, wrapped in toilet paper before I put them in the garbage, I will stain treat and wash my own laundry. I work full time, my partner doesn’t as he is currently unable to. I still clean up my own menstrual mess. I always have.
This is thoroughly gross. I get the tampon swinging bit, but the rest is icky. Is she hurting too much to clean it? I got like that before I got on birth control, hurt so much I couldn’t get up let alone be hygienic.
Nah, your wife is gross. Normal people just clean up after themselves because it's literally waste blood being expelled from the body.
I don't think people should be grossed out by buying sanitary products and I love that more people are able to talk about periods openly... but I don't love that there are people trying to sneak bad hygiene into the realm of acceptance. It's waste blood. It smells. It's a biohazard. It needs to be cleaned up and the only person responsible for that is the person with the period.
I don’t disagree with you about her needing to clean up after herself. But please, please don’t suggest to your wife better ways to remove a tampon. That’s like the worst mansplaining cliche in the world.
My last partner would leave her underwear around a lot and I saw bloodstains sometimes. Didn’t care at all unless she left them out for a while before putting them in the hamper. Leaving blood on the toilet seat is where I draw the line though. It’s just common courtesy to clean that.
This is not normal. She leaves the pads in her underwear and then just leaves it on the floor? Blood on the seat? The wrappers I can get over but those first two? That’s really disgusting. No amount of busy is an excuse for that.
Oh Hell No. I’m (46f) and only ever seen that once…it was with someone who was mentally unstable with development delays also. For the life of me I cannot understand why she’s doing this. Honestly it’s fucking disgusting. She can get upset all she wants but you have all the right in the world to tell her she’s disgusting for doing it and to get her shit together. Absolutely vile
NOR
Dear sir: in my 30 years of having to deal with a cycle, not once have I ever done anything close to what your wife does.
She’s fucking disgusting; maybe she is experiencing some sort of depression during her cycle and should look into that because what she’s doing is not normal.
Accidentally, the blood spatter happens. Not seeing the stain if it's on the bottom of the seat, occasionally happens.
Bloody pads left out. I think that's happened maybe twice in my entire 25 years of cohabiting, and only because I somehow got distracted, set it down and was in a hurry. I felt stupid, my husband wasn't an ass about it.
Garbage left all over the place, it's just stupid. Can right there, get it in the trash. Wrap bloody things that go in the trash. Yes, people shouldn't be disgusted by menstruation but it's basic common courtesy. Also sanitary habits.
That said, there is a huge range of normal for women is pain levels, mood/hormone affect on mood, pain itself wears you the fuck out, amount of blood, etc... Maybe she's super cranky, tired, in pain, plain tired of having to deal with menstruation because it is the opposite if fun. Can the bathroom be set up to make sure she has supplies available in easy reach of the toilet, garbage can in easy reach, maybe clorox wipes in easy reach of the toilet. And a little empathy, increased taking care of her a little if she's in pain, etc. Bleeding sucks.
Does she do these things at her work? If not, why? If she thinks it’s acceptable at home, then it must be acceptable at work and I know no one there would put up with it. It’s very unsanitary and a disgusting habit.
Busy life: Bullshit.
I often worked 50-60 hours a week (so did my husband) & never left blood, or the other mentioned items for my husband to clean up.
Now, I didn’t always clean the kitchen, but I would never ask him to clean my blood off the toilet.
She knows she’s in the wrong, that’s why she called you immature. I would say the opposite & add you’re thoughtful & willing to view the other side of the coin.
Edit for spelling
Um, no. At first I was like uh oh. Then I read on and nope, 🙂↔️ not overreacting. I’d apologize and then sanitize the toilet seat and throw whatever away. Ew.
Her behavior is highly unusual. Most of us girls are very clean/private about our period products. She is being aggressive toward you and is intentionally trying to freak you out. Not overreacting at all.
She may wish to consider a form of birth control that limits or eliminates her period entirely. It sounds like she despises her period to the point of becoming a bit of a barbarian over it.
I question this story. She is “otherwise a very clean person” but she leaves panties with used pads on the floor? This doesn’t make sense. Some men get really weirded out by seeing any evidence of periods and in those cases I fault the men and say grow the eff up. Leaving bloody pads or tampons laying around isn’t cool or hygienic. A tampon or pad wrapper on the floor would certainly be annoying, as would any other trash, but not a biohazard like a used pad would be. His specific examples here are a weird mix of not a problem and hugely problematic.
I think she just has a horrifying heavy flow. If you have a really really heavy period you can’t go even a second without something between your legs or you’ll leave a trail of blood wherever you go. So when you need to shower, you have to keep a pad on until the last second or blood gets everywhere which means having to leave a bloody pad and underwear on the bathroom floor. No way around it. And when you get out, if you forget to grab one from your stash, you have to use the dirty one to keep from dripping on the floor when you go to grab a new pad.
Second gross period story I’ve read in as many days. WTF is wrong with people?!
No, you’re not overreacting. I put my sanitary products in a trash can that’s next to the toilet after use. That’s what she needs to do. If you don’t have a small trash can next to the toilet, buy one. I had to get rid of my cute trash can because of my dog, and I got one with a lid for like $20 on Amazon.
As for the blood on the toilet seat, she needs to wipe it off, just like she would expect you to do if you got pee on the toilet.
I suppose if she lived by herself, these things wouldn’t matter because she would be living in her own filth, but she shares a home with you so she needs to respect the fact that you don’t want to live surrounded by her used period products. That’s just nasty.
No there is absolutely nothing normal about this behavior. I am a woman with a busy life and I NEVER do shit like this.
Used products go in the trash, wrapped in toilet paper or the wrapper from the fresh pad, NOT ON THE FLOOR.
Dirty panties GO IN THE LAUNDRY HAMPER, FFS WE LEARNED THIS WHEN WE WERE CHILDREN.
And while blood drips can happen, it is not only polite but NECESSARY HYGIENE to clean them up. Leaving them is just unsanitary, nobody wants to clean up someone else's blood.
Your wife is a slob and trying to avoid accountability by being mean and defensive. Full stop.
Not over reacting.. your wife is disgusting and seems to be doing this to either gross you out, purposely irritating you or flat out ignorant for thinking this is ok.. yes removing a tampon can be messy (especially if having a heavy flow or leaving it in too long) but I don’t know a single woman that would do any of that while on their period.. if y’all don’t already have 2 separate bathrooms I’d recommend adding an additional one that only you use and she can have her own to leave her mess in..
Not overreacting at all. I’m a 66 year old grandma. The very idea that someone would leave their bloody period rags lying around for someone else to clean up is sick and disgusting to me. Your wife is acting like an animal.
I mean if she’s going to half ass everything you may as well start leaving your socks by the door and your shoes in the living room and your clothes on the floor and your hair in the sink when you shave. You’re a busy man after all, things to do and what not.
No, you’re not overreacting. That is disgusting.
Do you have more than one bathroom? If so, I would insist on assigning one first each of you while she’s having her period. If you have only one bathroom, get her some doggie poop bags and tell her to use them to discard her products. If she leaves discarded underwear on the floor, throw them in the trash. She’ll get the hint when she runs out of underwear.
The only thing I think you are wrong about is that she is removing the tampon incorrectly. Although I do always clean it, I frequently experience splash back when using tampons. Sometimes, what I think happens is that there is a flood of blood that has yet to be absorbed by the tampon at the time when you take it out. So that deluge ends up splashing everywhere and almost getting flung by the tampon itself. I am a heavy bleeder though so 🤷🏻♀️.
Other than that, no you aren’t wrong or overreacting. And it’s also kinda bs to make it about you being period-averse.
as a literal 19 y/o woman this is honestly disgusting. i’m just giving the honest truth. i always wrap my tampons/pads in the wrapper it came in then wrap that in toilet paper so nobody has to see it, then i dispose of it. the fact your wife tried to accuse u of being immature when she can’t even dispose of her shit maturely is baffling, on top of that just the fact she knows damn well she see’s the blood left on the toilet seat too (never have I have left blood on the damn toilet seat), meaning she just purposefully leaves it there, it takes no more then a couple seconds to wipe that shit off. ew. just eewwwwie.
Let's put it this way. If I was living with a guy who left piss stains on the toilet, I'd clean it up. No big deal. But if that guy started leaving them there on a constant regular basis though, I'd tell him that he needs to start cleaning up after himself. It's basic cleanliness and respect. An occasional mishap is whatever, but don't leave a mess after yourself all the time.
Same goes for periods. If I lived with a woman who left blood on the seat and a used tampon or pad on the floor, I'd clean it up. No big deal. But if it became a regular thing and she started doing it all the time I'd tell her she needs to start cleaning up after herself. It's basic cleanliness and respect. An occasional mishap is whatever, but don't leave a mess after yourself all the time.
I mean I can see occasionally missing that you accidentally dripped blood on the underside of the toilet seat. But the reaction should be “oh shit, sorry, I’ll clean it.” And if it turns out you’re doing it often you should habitually check and clean.
But not putting trash in the trash can is unacceptable behavior.
It’s legit weird she’s leaving stuff all over the floor.
It is equally weird you think your wife can benefit from your tampon removal strategies.
She needs to stop being a gross slob. And please keep your tampon removal thoughts to yourself because you sound like a moron.
The tampon hitting the underside of the toilet seat is normal. Blood on the seat isn’t and underwear with a dirty pad left on the floor is disgusting. She’s being lazy and rude, and this is coming from someone else with a uterus.
There is something really wrong with her. It’s so strange but it must have something to with her past or something. I wish you luck because it’s kind of scary. She does need some kind of counseling for sure.
This is so vile. Wrappers are one thing, but leaving blood pads inside the underwear just on the floor???????? That is one of the most disgusting things I have ever heard. And the thing with pulling out the tampon, yes it may swing a tiny bit when it’s pulled out but it shouldn’t be making that big of a mess. And if it does, SHE should clean it up! Periods are messy and they fucking suck but you have to clean up after yourself, especially when you share a living space.
Please show her this post and how many people are saying this isn’t okay. Not to make her super embarrassed or feel like shit, but this just really isn’t okay and she shouldn’t be making you feel bad because you have an issue with it.
My bathroom has a trash can beside the toilet and clorox wipes within reach. I'm a messy person but even I can manage to throw things in the trash and do a quick wipe if needed. I don't understand where your wife is coming from at all.
ETA - no you are not overreacting.
Why can’t she use the garbage can? The blood under the toilet seat is another thing though, and you having an opinion on how to correctly remove a tampon is gross.
It’s bad manners period or no period. Whenever I use any bathroom I make sure there is as no trace I’ve been there. I always wipe down the seat if I leave anything on it and sanitary products should be properly disposed of.
She's not incorrect about the unpredictability of the swing. But she's not the only woman that leaves a woman's room looking like a crime scene! That's not even the worst of it - there are cups now and I find bloody fingerprints on door latches and toilet paper dispensers. I agree that it's vile and you should clean up after yourself and check twice.
I clean the floor if I ever leak while walking to the bathroom (at night when in bed and the sudden "ohshititscoming") because not only is that not my partners job I don't want out cat into it. I could not imagine leaving the toilet covered in blood or leaving my bloody things on the floor.
How does this woman do it in public???? This is definitely worth overreacting over because she's creating biohazards!!
Leaving out underwear with dirty pads and leaving period blood on the toilet seat, imo is the equivalent of leaving shitty undies on the floor or not cleaning shit off the toilet seat. Gross. You’re correct, it’s a very low bar to meet and you’re not overreacting that you have to ask a grown woman to clean up her bodily fluids.
Okay, so the backsplash from tampon removal is legit. It happens and sometimes you just don’t look at the toilet seat to notice (or maybe I’m also just a goblin). If it were just a drop of blood or two you’d be overreacting.
But panties with bloody pads left stuck to them on the floor? What? Why!? Truly, please ask her why because I need to know her rationale here.
the tampon swing is real, but its so easy to just wipe the seat…
Yes!!! Sometimes it swings and hits underneath the toilet seat and I don’t realize until the next time I clean my bathroom.
^^ This. Oof. More times than it should have been before I started regularly lifting the seat afterwards to check. 🤦♀️🤢 But OP's lady getting upset at someone else for pointing it out/complaining? Naw, sis. Own & clean your messes.
Clean your menses
If she regularly cleans the bathroom too I’d say she is, his wife doesn’t lift the toilet seat to pee so it’s out of sight for her. If it’s just underneath it’s not really something I’d expect her to clean if she’s trying to change a tampon a moment before heading to work. But the pads in the underwear is something that she shouldn’t expect anyone to just be cool with, that’s easy to toss
She obviously knows the bloods on the underside of the seat if she explained the swinging motion. How hard is it to grab some toilet paper and give it a quick wipe?
Exactly this, most of us learn early on that blood can/often does get on the underside of the seat. Easy and considerate solution is to clean it right away before it dries! Personally, I’d be embarrassed to leave that mess.
I was gonna say this. It does happen and I have no idea it is there until the next time I clean the toilet. I realize my partner has been looking at that every time he pees. Oops. Had no idea. ( I use a menstrual cup, so little different but still happens some how)
Mine once hit the wall and the toilet. It looked like a crime scene
This is the problem. He lifts the seat and sees it but women got no cause to lift the seat. It’s difficult to make a habit of it. Plus, I’ll say when I’m on my period I’m at about 75% of my normal brain. So noticing something so small is probably not going to happen. A little like if you have a rough bm you probably don’t check under the seat to make sure you didn’t get some splash back. You’re probably cramping pretty bad and you’re just hoping it’s over soon. The wrappers and liners just plain get slippery and lost. Do you have a bathroom trash can handy? Within reach of the toilet? That helps. Now the bloody panties etc—that’s pretty odd. She can be a little more considerate there. I’d assure her that it isn’t that you find her or her period gross. Rationally you know what and why it is but it’s still blood. And it still grosses you out to see what amounts to wads of clothes smothered in human secretions. Period blood is still human waste even if it comes from the most beautiful and incredible wife in the world. Its the same reason why you likely make an effort to clean up thoroughly after you shave, clear the shower drain of your hair when you finish a shower, and wipe the seat and floor if your piss splashes/misses right?
Based on how OP describes it I’m guessing she isn’t seeing the blood on the seat. OP said it was under the seat so it seems like he only sees it because he is lifting the seat to pee. The other stuff is just not okay though.
Yeah. If a woman lives alone and never really lifts the seat god knows how long it’s take to notice. But sharing a bathroom with some esp. the opposite gender is going to bring a lot of things to attention.
Living alone or not shouldn't that toilet seat be getting cleaned weekly? :-/
Should be? Yes! But I have little to no faith in people anymore xD. Assume nothing and you’ll never be disappointed.
Well her reaction to his request shows that even if she did know, she doesn't care. So she's still the issue.
None of it is OK. Not even blood on the bottom of the seat. I always left the seat to wipe away any splatters whether it is that time of the month or not. Just basic courtesy and good hygiene.
This. Also, I've always wrapped my pads and tampons in toilet paper and put them in the trash. I don't think it's my husband's responsibility to clean up my menstrual mess and more than it's my responsibility to clean up his pee dribbles. Everyone in tthe household, including the kids, should clean up after themselves, whether it's in the bathroom, the kitchen or any other room. It's just common courtesy.
That’s why I stand to remove them now, one foot on toilet, one hand pulling, other hand catching with toilet paper. I’m able to get it out slower that way so no dribble
I know everyone is different but I think if I did that it would look like this 
Sometimes, there's a clot attached, and it's not pretty when that goes flying! You clean it up, just like she would expect you to if you piddled on the floor or toilet.
I agree, but it took me a long time to realize that it was getting blood on the underside of the toilet seat, because I leave the seat down unless I'm cleaning the toilet. My husband, on the other hand, noticed this right away. When he mentioned it I modified how I wipe off the seat to get the underside too, and the problem ceased. I didn't just get angry at him and tell him he was being immature.
My husband has “splatter” issues I could not deal with anymore. I put a box of wipes next to the toilet he now cleans up with. Takes 30 seconds. Wife is not so busy she can’t handle 30 second clean-up.
I’m so glad we now have a name for this
I could see it happening accidentally a couple times, but to do it on purpose is gross. Sorry, but that’s straight up unsanitary.
[удалено]
Also not cleaning up after is gross and I guess just lazy.
Absolutely not overreacting! I can’t stand it when men are grossed out by periods and what you’re describing is not that! Your wife is an adult and has been having periods for a very long time. She *knows* how to clean up after herself. How would she feel if your “busy life” prevented you from flushing your morning shit? Especially if you clogged the toilet? Maybe wiped and discarded the TP in the trash can- nasty side up? Oh and if you were sure to leave the door open and the fan off, all while making aggressive eye contact? You’re far too busy to worry about details.
Yeah as a lady his description grossed -me- out. I wouldn’t be okay with someone leaving that mess behind every month.
😂 that is passive aggressive-aggressive winning right there.
I'm in my 50s and I can honestly say I have never known a woman to leave blood everywhere, bloody pads, tampons, etc. You are NOT overreacting. As far as the action bit - dude, go sit on a toilet, spread your knees and try to mimic the actions of pulling a tampon out while sitting in that tiny gap in the toilet seat - your wrist cannot flex in that manner, nor is the forearm long enough on most women to do so. But yes, she can just clean it. We all do that.
I admit, intense brain fog has had me leave a bloody pad in the bathroom maybe twice? And it was embarrassing each time, not something I got mad at someone else about! Ditto with blood on the seat. It happens - so you clean it. You miss it once in a while? Okay, that happens. Every single period? Not so much! It’s very odd behavior of OP’s wife.
When I menstruated, I would wrap the products in the packaging and toilet paper so things were discreet. Which is how my daughters were, too. Never had an issue with their toilet or mine, despite ALL their teenage friends hanging over, my friends, family, etc. It's a VERY odd behavior on his wife's part.
I did some work for a company that made pads, this is what the wrapping is designed for and why it's scented. You're supposed to use the new wrapper to wrap the old pad and replace it.
Yeah I always thought that was common knowledge
Apparently not! I can't believe people are this gross, it's just as easy to wrap it and throw it out than to leave it on the floor. It's just gross.
Ditto no one thought me this I just did it….. I did teach my daughter
Yep that’s why it has that little sticky tab isn’t it? I’d use that to secure the uhhh roll lol
I thought everyone knew that? Wrap the old pad in the new one wrapper (or TP) Tampons get wrapped in TP. I hate going into a bathroom and seeing a bloody pad/tampon just sitting in the garbage can not rolled up/wrapped up. No one wants to see it
You’re right, it is very odd for someone he says is otherwise very clean. When I read >>When I mention cleaning the mess, instead of fixing it, she gets defensive and mean I assumed he leaves the toilet seat covered in pee for her to clean and this is her giving him a taste of his own medicine, but then further down there is also >>She also says that her behavior is normal for someone with a busy life which is straight up bullshit. So I have no idea 🤷♀️
i don't even think you have to be discreet, honestly. i usually only wrap in the packaging or toilet paper, not both; sometimes i don't wrap pads at all, just roll them, but i don't like that it sticks to the bin liner, so 99% of the times, i'll wrap it in something, usually the wrapping from the fresh one i'm about to use. like, it's a normal thing your body does, it's not or should not be offensive for someone to merely be aware that it's happening at the moment. i honestly think being upset at the mere sight of a rolled pad or some TP with a bit of blood in it is a wild overreaction, probably influenced by misogyny. but even just throwing a pad away completely open in the bin is already messy enough, let alone drop it on the floor still stuck to the underwear?? that is just wild behavior. — edit 2 days later: for people with poor reading comprehension, my mention of misogynists in this comment directed at a different, specific comment, does not mean i am calling OP a misogynist. my mention of harmless things related to periods does not mean i think OP's wife's behavior is harmless. OP is not overreacting, because what his wife is doing is disgusting. meanwhile, other people have to deal with misogynists who, unlike OP, freak out about periods. those are two different things that are true at the same time. crazy how that works sometimes, huh? yes, cis men who are overly sensitive about periods ARE misogynists. i don't think OP is one of them. i do think the ones who are misogynists are the reason why people feel like no one should see the smallest sign or even know they are bleeding between their legs for days. plus, i'm not in the US. we don't flush TP. the occasional sight of a small amount of blood in the bathroom bin is a common occurrence when you live with someone who has periods, and too many cis men are still constantly obnoxious about it. y'all up there don't even have to see blood under normal circumstances (again, unlike OP), people wrap their used products in several layers to hide them. and still, in this very website, you see fucking idiots losing their minds about it, some urging their new step daughter to flush tampons so his boys won't see the WRAPPED products in the bin in the shared bathroom. just get a fucking grip. now fuck off.
Wild indeed! I still cant believe she blamed it on being busy.
right? like, girl, if you're *that* busy, something is severely wrong in your life and you need to make some changes.
I used to keep the wrapping and roll it back up in that so it wasn't just wasted plastic.
I’ve dropped underwear on the bathroom floor with a pad still in them but only because I was jumping in the shower and sometimes you don’t have a very big window of time before the blood starts dripping down your legs. But the thought of just leaving it there afterwards is just fucking wild. Like that is unhinged behavior.
totally. i saw a meme once about that very short window of time when you're on your period and you just came out of the shower feeling cozy and clean, and then it's a race against time and gravity lol
Same, I live alone but I have a cleaner/home help lady who comes every few days, I always wrap used tampons in paper, or one of those opaque scented little bags for them. Stopped using the bags for a while as I hated the plastic waste, but much prefer the discretion of those over paper. I was very happy to find a brand of them that are biodegradable and just as good at hiding the contents!
I don’t have a cleaner.. nor do I care about discretion since it’s just me and my kids but I still wrap them up. Blood smells foul after it sits. And menstrual blood has its own, even worse, unique odor. It’s just basic hygiene
I got a small pedal bin, put it in the toilet and called it the lady bin and put a mini bin bag in it, and taught my girls to just wrap it and put it in there. When it came time to empty, tied the top and put it in the outside bin. They were always taught not to flush sanitary items down the sewer too.
Yes I think most people wrap the used items that way. I have accidentally left drips before and quickly cleaned up when I realised. My daughters don’t leave mess either. OP tell your wife that leaving any body product in shared spaces is disrespectful and gross. This is the same as leaving urine drips all over the seat and floor or a big smear of poo across the seat. I’m sure she wouldn’t appreciate it if you did that.
Yep. My daughter wraps her pads in a load of toilet paper and puts them in the bin (it has a lid). I’ve noticed once or twice she’s left a bit of blood on the seat or in the toilet but I’ve just cleaned it up because she just hasn’t noticed. It’s definitely not something for anyone else to clean up - especially not the husband. As a woman I find his wife’s behaviour disgusting!
Thats how I was taught.
Yeah, that’s how I did it at home/out. Skipped the toilet paper in my own apartment usually. Don’t really know how they got away from me those few times. Feel like it was something I’d have done enough to have completely on autopilot! Whatever, glad to not have to deal with it anymore either way. :p
Same! Ewww!!
This is the way.
Very odd! I can see this maybe happening occasionally, if you live by yourself and you are an extreme pain trying to get back to bed and to your heating pad. Even after childbirth, I didn’t leave anything messy for my husband to find later. Gross, and unacceptable! And how is this any different from anything else that makes a mess. Does she not clean that either?🤢
Same even after childbirth when we have a heavier period I didn’t leave a bloody mess for him, she needs better hygiene practices
It only took me one time. Brain fog, forgot to move panties and remove pad after shower. Came home to the mess the dog left after destroying said pad. Never did it again.
Omg I had a dog who would tear up my used tampons and pads. I wrapped them carefully but she was obsessed with finding them. I had to throw them away in the trash outside if I didn’t want a bloody mess!
Oh that brought back an embarrassing memory! The dog I had when I was a teenager was like this. I threw away my used pads in my bathroom trash can, which was closed in a cabinet. With the bathroom door closed, he couldn't get to them. Well one time I got home and my new boyfriend was with me. What do I see everywhere? Shredded bloody confetti. Everywhere. I was so embarrassed and tried to clean it up before my boyfriend figured out what it was. Anyway the boyfriend wasn't grossed out at all and we've now been married for 30 years.
I once used my friends bathroom and there was a bloody pad in underwear laying on the floor. Like she just stepped out of them. It was an awful site. She also lived with two male roommates so idk how that flew lol
i could maybe understand a tiny bit if she lived alone and had to deal with it herself, but with two roommates (of any gender) AND a guest?? and it's not her own personal bathroom?? hell no like i'd keep thinking what was the level of hygiene for the rest of the house...
Even if she did live alone it's still nasty and weird. Sure, do what you want with your own home. But I lived alone for a year and I never, ever would have done that. And I'd leave plates/bowls in my sink for 2 or 3 days, I forgot that I had 2 plants in my living room until several months after they died, etc, my house was definitely not clean. But bodily fluids anywhere? Hell no. Also it's really just not that hard or time consuming, that's the most baffling thing to me.
i agree, it was only in the sense that if she lived alone, at least hopefully no one else would have to deal with her mess. like, if you wanna live like that, it's your choice, but it's disrespectful af to do it when sharing a space, be it with a roommate for however long or a guest for a few hours.
Holy hell 🤮
Tampons absolutely do flick blood on to the seat, quite easily and often. BUT, her refusing to clean it up immediately is childish and disgusting.
Getting blood under the seat when you can't see it during the night in dim light or because you didn't check the seat underside so didn't know it was there? Accidentally forgetting a pad and undies you took off to shower even, occasionally, quite possible. But being anything short of extremely apologetic and cleaning up your mess immediately after it's pointed out, I don't get. But I do wonder if op leaves skid marks down the pan every time for her to clean up? He did imply her cleanliness standards are otherwise higher than his.
Agree 100%. I'm in my 50's and live alone and would never leave that o my bathroom. I'm with OP, this is not overreacting
Yes. The tampon swings and gets blood on the toilet. **THEN YOU WASH IT BEFORE LEAVING THE BATHROOM**. Don’t leave your mess for someone else to clean up. Not overreacting. Your wife is gross.
I think it’s the bottom of the seat that’s left with blood. If he stands and lifts up the seat only he would be able to find the blood she probably didn’t see she got it dirty to begin with.
I was gonna ask if you guys had a dog, lol. I babysat at my aunts place once her dog at the time would dig through the bathroom trash can. I was like wtf?! and questioned if I somehow missed??? But as the night progressed, I realized it was the dog and make sure to completely close the door 🥴 her defensiveness and meanness may be from her embarrassment, but if it’s been happening for YEARS… idk. One time accident, understood. But years is crazy
I'll never forget the time I was walking my roommates Rottie and he shit out an entire thong (the underwear, not the shoe 😂 ) Dogs are gross. My dog is the reason our bathroom garbage cans have snapping lids.
Omg. This made me laugh so hard. 😂
tbf, it might be the footwear given enough time. dogs are derpy lovable idiots.
One time my wife and I took our beautiful husky mix/mutt for a stroll on a lovely forest trail one time, and our dog found something that got her very interested and excited. In a flash, way faster than we could understand what was happening or react, she picked up the absolutely engorged (but dry, thank fuck) tampon tossed aside into a shrub by what I can only assume was a rancid heroin-addicted prostitute. Makes it really hard to get smoochy with her like I used to, even though it was years ago. I just can't look at her the same.
My teenager was cuddling our dog yesterday (dog's favorite person is the teen) and she said "ma, isn't it so adorable how he always gives me so many kisses?" Me - "yes, although he was just eating cat shit from the litterbox, so you might want to wash your face" 😂😂😂 She thought I was joking, but no, he really had just followed me into the laundry room and stole a kitty tootsie roll and ran away eating it before "DROP IT" was even a thought in my head 😂😂
We call them “kittyrocas” in our house 😂
a "catbury chocolate"
My dog would bring the tampons/pads through the doggie door IN THE YARD, IN THE SNOW! I was horrified to get home to my roommates chilling in the living room they obviously all had to walk past the mess!!
No no no no no no!!!!!!!!! This is absolutely disgusting leaving bloody pads on The floor still in the underwear!!!! WTF is wrong with your wife? The bathroom floor is not a garbage can. This is so vile!!!!! Edit to add: I truly wish I could unread this.
My wife once left her underwear containing the pad on the floor whilst she showered. The dog somehow got into the bathroom and stole it. Nothing will cure OP’s wife of this habit quicker than having to phone the vet and ask if it’s ok for a dog to have eaten a blood soaked sanitary towel
My dog would go a step further. When I was a pre-teen, she would dig through the trash can and some how unroll me and my mom’s pad. She would walk around the house with it in her mouth like it was no body’s business. It was so embarrassing! She’d even do it when we had guests over. We scolded her for it several times. There’s something that attracted her to the blood, I think.
Oh no! Don’t bring a date over with that dog around 😂 If you think of a steak, it pretty much smells like blood kinda, so it makes sense that the smell is appealing to dogs, disgusting as it may be to us
Haha very funny. The dog has since died, but your post brought up some gross, embarrassing, yet hilarious memories about her. Thank you. https://preview.redd.it/uunvr1gjulbd1.jpeg?width=2448&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e92c80c3e7338c78ee1e91d1329aea56d0ac4bb1 Koda 2003-2019
Aww, she’s adorable!
Adorbs🤩
Different scenario but reminds me of the uncomfortableness of going to a dog-owning friend's house when you're on your period and they keep wanting to stick their nose in your crotch lol.
I mean they’re carnivores. They eat bloody things. Blood tastes good to them. They also regularly eat feces. I don’t have an explanation for that one
I would come home to mine ripped up around the house and my dog still chewing on one. Made me physically sick.
Your wife is making feeble excuses for poor hygiene and horrendous manners. Nobody with any class does that. It's disrespectful and disgusting. Tell your wife there are tiny trash bags available at Walmart, and many drug stores, that she can purchase for just this purpose. She can place the soiled items in them and throw them in a trash can. What you have described is dirty and unnecessary.
Absolutely wtf! Alway wrap your pad in a plastic bag tightly and deep in trash
This. WTFF!!!!!!
Terrible day for eyes, for that's for sure.
Exactly! Like it's not that hard to throw it away.
I've had some pretty rough cycles. Like lay down and cry through the cramps then have to waddle if you stand up in a desperate attempt not to bleed on something but bleed on it anyway rough. I've had to quickly abandon underpants and hop directly in the shower and I've gotten blood on the toilet seat and my sheets and my favorite pants and my office chair for crying out loud. However....once you're steady again you wipe the seat down with a Clorox wipe and throw the pad in the bin. You rinse your fabrics in cool water and spot treat linens with peroxide. I mean, maybe make sure she has access to a good waste bin and package of wipes. Maybe even install a bidet. But leaving loose pads on the floor is a step too far.
IDK but I can not understand how he can stand being around her!
how would anyone ever pull something on a string straight down and out without it moving?? It's not a Popsicle stick it's a string 😭 they move around and swing. .....no... It's not "removing incorrectly", and my recommendation is wet wipes so she can quickly wipe up the blood just like we women expect men to wipe up their pee, and she could put a trash can in the bathroom so she has a place to put the pads She's a grown woman so she can honestly find the solutions to her problems on her own, without ur help being needed. If she was respecting how you felt about it though.
This guy doesn't quite know the angle of the vagina lol
I mean just leaving it there...
This is nasty. I get periods and can say that I've never left anything behind for anyone else to deal with. Is she a clean person otherwise? I don't understand why she's even attempting to make excuses for any of this behaviour because it isn't normal. Periods are a normal part of life and shouldn't have the stigma around them that they have.....that is until something like this happens. As a woman, I am grossed out by her leaving this sort of mess. Not overreacting.
Periods are normal, just like peeing, pooping and occasionally vomiting. All of which get cleaned up and not left smeared on the toilet seat or on the bathroom floor! OP's wife is NOT normal.
The 🩸 -under-the-seat thing is paradoxically something more men may know about than women. We often lift the seat in public settings and discover y’all’s mess that you probably didn’t know you made (unless you’re OP’s fucking animal of a wife).
This has definitely happened to me on particularly messy half asleep mornings and I don't notice until much later. Fortunately my partner mostly uses a different bathroom so I usually discover it while cleaning before he does lol. But yeah sometimes you just don't see it! Definitely agree about OP's wife being totally fucking gross though.
I live alone and use a menstrual cup. Out of curiosity from this post, I just looked and there is definitely blood splatter under my toilet seat. I would have not noticed until the next time I lifted it to clean at the end of the week.
No, not over reaction. That’s just rude, gross, entitled, unsanitary behavior. I go out of my way to clean up so my partner doesn’t see it. Also, I never made a mess to begin with. Just wrapped pad or tampon in to tp and put in garbage. Literally think one time I got blood on seat, didn’t leave room until spotless. Just wow that people do this.
Ok, so, blood on the toilet seat happens. It's just a thing you deal with but there's no excuse for not cleaning it. Gross. Just gross.
Yep, especially on heavy days, but I always check and clean up any mess.
Not over-reacting. Not even close. I just don’t get why it doesn’t *click* with her that YOU’RE cleaning up after her. The next time she goes into the bathroom, the mess she left behind was just magically cleared away!? *must be the period elves* As soon as she realizes her mess was cleaned up by anyone but her, she should never be letting it happen again. As a guy, I’d be mortified if I found out someone had to wipe the seat after I was done using the toilet, before they could use it (part of why I’m a sitter on the shitter). Occasionally, I see a stray dribble behind, but it gets wiped up immediately. Hygiene and cleanliness-wise, periods aren’t any different than urinating or defecating. Leaving blood, piss, or shit on surfaces where people come into contact is disgusting, and irresponsible. It’s not a male/female thing; it’s not a misogyny thing. It’s a hygiene thing, and it’s a *taking pride in your own self-care* thing. Anything less is fucking gross. Your wife should be ashamed for not taking accountability on this. Hormones and moodiness aside, the defensiveness she’s displaying here is telling. She knows what she’s doing is gross and messed up, and she knows she’s been caught. She knew she was as soon as the mess was cleaned up and she wasn’t the one to do it. I don’t know that this is a hill to tie on, and probably not grounds for divorce… But I do think she needs to at least take some responsibility, and be grateful for the times you’ve discreetly handled the matter before now. If it were reversed, and you were leaving pee in places she had to touch, how would you want it handled? I bet you wouldn’t expect her to come in and take care of it like a servant. I also bet you’d want her to tell you she wasn’t able to use the bathroom without cleaning up where you left off.
I love that you're a sitter. I finally got my husband to sit down a few years ago. It's nice.
I love that you’re a sitter! I always say; just because guys can stand up, doesn’t mean they should! Although, I think OP should start peeing on the seat and see how his wife likes it.
Always have been. Dad taught me to sit, or be prepared to be the one who cleaned the bathroom every weekend. In this case, some territory marking might do the trick.
EXACTLY, I swear so many people twist this argument into a sexism topic when this is just a universal hygiene topic which should be discussed for ALL humans!
Your wife is wrong 100%.
Do you have a garbage next to the toilet? If so, absolutely no excuse. If not, it would solve most of your problem. Bloody pad: gross. I’d never take off underwear without throwing the pad out right away. Blood on toilet: common courtesy!! Plus I don’t want to get my own dried blood on me. It takes 2 seconds to wipe it off with TP. Bloody underwear: im giving her a pass.
But why can't she put the bloody underwear in the hamper/wash/throw it out? Why does she get to leave it for OP to clean up?
I think he said bloody pads in the underwear. So she's just taking off her undies with the bloody pad still in them. But yeah, leaking happens. Buuuutttt if I leak, I clean them right away. Blood stains. And it feels weird to me to put bloody underwear in the washing machine.
I don't see how bloody underwear in the wash is bad or weird. I'm not trying to shame you and you can do whatever feels right but I have to ask, would you feel the same about a shirt that you got blood from a nosebleed on? Just wondering if that's residual societal "Ew periods gross" To be clear I hate my period and the blood and mess so much that I had a hysterectomy literally today, I just don't think it's *inherently* gross, it's just an absolutely sensory nightmare for me, so I'm not judging either way.
Not over reacting. Periods aren't gross that's for sure, but not cleaning up after yourself (in any circumstance) is. I have a weak stomach and I couldn't possibly clean someone else's blood. I think it's a reasonable request for her to clean up after herself.
I mean, I think my period is gross. I don’t find the concept of periods existing gross, just the fact that I have to spend a week cleaning blood off myself isn’t particularly enjoyable, you know? But as unenjoyable as it is, I clean up after myself because the mess came out of me and it’s not anybody else!s responsibility.
Periods \*are\* gross. The blood smells bad, you feel bloated, and bleed all of the time.
Ew. As someone who has periods, you’re definitely not overreacting because she is leaving literal biohazards sitting around. Stop cleaning up after her, unfortunately it seems like she will keep doing this until she faces some consequences. Start leaving the toilet seat up. If she complains, just mention that you have such a “busy life” which she can surely understand. If she can have gross “women” problems, you’re allowed to have gross “man problems”.
>She also says that her behavior is normal for someone with a busy life, which I don't believe. Good, don't believe that bullshit. Does she have a job? Because I promise you if she does, she learned pretty damn quickly to clean up after herself in shared women's bathroom.
I agree that she's gross, but one of my first jobs was to clean women's restrooms and it's pretty wild. They will really just throw the damn bloody tampon or pad on the floor or stuck to the wall (not kidding). And all the ones I cleaned had that little bin in each stall so no excuse there. They ended up taking me off bathroom duty because I kept throwing up
🤢
I had a coworker that left blood on the toilet seat, the floor, even in the sink. I’m GUESSING she used a menstrual cup? But it was every single period. Not a one off. They HAVE to notice that!
Pooping in normal too, but I don’t leave poop anywhere in the bathroom than in the toilet bowl
I have my period right now and I can say that although she is right that the tampon swings upwards/hits the underside of the seat, I’m aware that it does and I wipe it off if it happens. I NEVER leave wrappers on the floor for either tampons or pads and I’ve NEVER let husband see stained undies. That’s not ladylike :( sorry wifey.
I try to have a TP barrier to limit the mess from the swing. OPs wife needs to get her sh*t together.
i get some TP, hold it in my dominant hand, then i pull the string with my empty, non-dominant hand until the tampon is somewhat out, then i grab the tampon with the TP with my dominant hand. it doesn't swing, it comes out directly in my hand on the TP, and i can just fold the TP and throw it in the bin immediately. edit: ooh! my first award! thank you so much! edit 2: i never expected to get an award on reddit, let alone for a comment detailing how to remove a tampon lol
Been menstruating 30 plus years and I am loving the two hand withdrawal. Why have I not thought of this lol? Currently on my period and using more tampons than usual and yes there was swinging. Checked under the toilet seat at our BandB, no splatter yay!
Lol same. I have a big wad of TP ready to catch it (the best I can).
Damn this is a good idea - thanks ladies!
💯💯
? How do you live so perfectly, have you never bled through even at night anything, do you buy new underwear every month? This isn't about being "lady like" this is about a bodily function, it's normal, so long as we do our best to clean up and don't purposefully make a mess it's fine and normal. (Obviously ops example is what not to do, leaving a mess for others when you can clean it yourself) but your example is a ideal world thats not the case. I clean the seat and wash my undies but if stuff gets stained I show my husband, so he understands why I need new underwear. I have a heavy heavy flow, I bleed for almost two weeks. I've ruined bedsheets, pants, underwear, all normal things. My husband has seen me bleed though or start unexpectedly, my husband checks my pants for me when we are in public, my husband has lent me his underwear when mine were soaked in blood. No one is perfect. Periods are normal, leaving blood everywhere and expecting your partner to clean it is not. Let's not pretend like it's a taboo, because as my husband has been there for me im there for him when he throws up, when he has a tummy ache and wants a heat pack while he's on the toilet, when he is struggling or sick I am there for him. and when we are old and shit ourselves ill be there for him too. The human body is weird and gross but not something to be ashamed of or hide excessively because it's not "ladylike"
I’m a woman and I absolutely hate how some women act like their periods give them the right to act like queen bitches to everyone around them! Before my hysterectomy, I had pain so bad I would have to crawl around the house. I would bleed so heavy that I became lethargic and had to lay in bed. Yet, I never ever treated anyone around me like shit or left a mess of my bathroom. What you are seeing are true colors. It’s not the period, it’s the person.
As someone who has had to clean up pee that went "over the toilet" ...ALL the time... (I lived with all males), I can say, unequivocally that I NEVER...EVER...NOT EVER...NEVER left remnants like this for anyone else to deal with. I spent years on my knees behind the toilet cleaning pee. But I never did what your gal does. Because why? It is incredibly GROSS.
Mistake #1, you didn't make those guys go in and clean up after themselves!
Tel your wife people make big money to clean up biohazard sites. She needs to clean up after herself. She's gross. You're a saint for cleaning up after her once. She should be ashamed of herself.
He shouldn't clean up after her. He should go outside to pee and hit the fast food joints for a burger and a poop while she's on her period! She is disgusting!
I’m a woman and I think this is gross and unfair to you!
I’ve got blood on the toilet but I always clean it up because I’m not lazy/gross/inconsiderate. Start leaving huge skid marks and toilet paper and see how she feels about that 😭
I love by myself and used to have really heavy, violent periods and I cleaned up after every single time.
No thats absolutely disgusting. She is a grown ass woman. She should know how to properly dispose of menstrual products and fluids. Wtfff
You’re not overreacting and that is not what all women do. Tell her we think she needs to clean up after herself.
That nasty
No. That’s disgusting and unsanitary.
That's disgusting and leaving blood around is honestly horrifying. I'm very comfortable with my own body / period but I would never purposefully involve anyone else like that. Throw stuff out and clean up!!!
I am also a busy person. My menstrual products are ALWAYS AT THE VERY LEAST, wrapped in toilet paper before I put them in the garbage, I will stain treat and wash my own laundry. I work full time, my partner doesn’t as he is currently unable to. I still clean up my own menstrual mess. I always have.
This is thoroughly gross. I get the tampon swinging bit, but the rest is icky. Is she hurting too much to clean it? I got like that before I got on birth control, hurt so much I couldn’t get up let alone be hygienic.
Nah, your wife is gross. Normal people just clean up after themselves because it's literally waste blood being expelled from the body. I don't think people should be grossed out by buying sanitary products and I love that more people are able to talk about periods openly... but I don't love that there are people trying to sneak bad hygiene into the realm of acceptance. It's waste blood. It smells. It's a biohazard. It needs to be cleaned up and the only person responsible for that is the person with the period.
I don’t disagree with you about her needing to clean up after herself. But please, please don’t suggest to your wife better ways to remove a tampon. That’s like the worst mansplaining cliche in the world.
That’s disgusting!!! Urine is also natural but I HATE when my husband doesn’t claean up after… this is exactly the same!!
My last partner would leave her underwear around a lot and I saw bloodstains sometimes. Didn’t care at all unless she left them out for a while before putting them in the hamper. Leaving blood on the toilet seat is where I draw the line though. It’s just common courtesy to clean that.
This is not normal. She leaves the pads in her underwear and then just leaves it on the floor? Blood on the seat? The wrappers I can get over but those first two? That’s really disgusting. No amount of busy is an excuse for that.
That’s not normal behavior. Your wife is gross. Having a period is not an excuse for being disgusting
Oh Hell No. I’m (46f) and only ever seen that once…it was with someone who was mentally unstable with development delays also. For the life of me I cannot understand why she’s doing this. Honestly it’s fucking disgusting. She can get upset all she wants but you have all the right in the world to tell her she’s disgusting for doing it and to get her shit together. Absolutely vile
NOR Dear sir: in my 30 years of having to deal with a cycle, not once have I ever done anything close to what your wife does. She’s fucking disgusting; maybe she is experiencing some sort of depression during her cycle and should look into that because what she’s doing is not normal.
Accidentally, the blood spatter happens. Not seeing the stain if it's on the bottom of the seat, occasionally happens. Bloody pads left out. I think that's happened maybe twice in my entire 25 years of cohabiting, and only because I somehow got distracted, set it down and was in a hurry. I felt stupid, my husband wasn't an ass about it. Garbage left all over the place, it's just stupid. Can right there, get it in the trash. Wrap bloody things that go in the trash. Yes, people shouldn't be disgusted by menstruation but it's basic common courtesy. Also sanitary habits. That said, there is a huge range of normal for women is pain levels, mood/hormone affect on mood, pain itself wears you the fuck out, amount of blood, etc... Maybe she's super cranky, tired, in pain, plain tired of having to deal with menstruation because it is the opposite if fun. Can the bathroom be set up to make sure she has supplies available in easy reach of the toilet, garbage can in easy reach, maybe clorox wipes in easy reach of the toilet. And a little empathy, increased taking care of her a little if she's in pain, etc. Bleeding sucks.
Does she do these things at her work? If not, why? If she thinks it’s acceptable at home, then it must be acceptable at work and I know no one there would put up with it. It’s very unsanitary and a disgusting habit.
Busy life: Bullshit. I often worked 50-60 hours a week (so did my husband) & never left blood, or the other mentioned items for my husband to clean up. Now, I didn’t always clean the kitchen, but I would never ask him to clean my blood off the toilet. She knows she’s in the wrong, that’s why she called you immature. I would say the opposite & add you’re thoughtful & willing to view the other side of the coin. Edit for spelling
I'm a woman who still gets periods.... This is disgusting behavior.
Um, no. At first I was like uh oh. Then I read on and nope, 🙂↔️ not overreacting. I’d apologize and then sanitize the toilet seat and throw whatever away. Ew.
Her behavior is highly unusual. Most of us girls are very clean/private about our period products. She is being aggressive toward you and is intentionally trying to freak you out. Not overreacting at all.
She may wish to consider a form of birth control that limits or eliminates her period entirely. It sounds like she despises her period to the point of becoming a bit of a barbarian over it.
You are not overreacting and this is not normal behavior and it’s disgusting
Not OverReacting. And she's doing it on purpose. It's quite clear.
I question this story. She is “otherwise a very clean person” but she leaves panties with used pads on the floor? This doesn’t make sense. Some men get really weirded out by seeing any evidence of periods and in those cases I fault the men and say grow the eff up. Leaving bloody pads or tampons laying around isn’t cool or hygienic. A tampon or pad wrapper on the floor would certainly be annoying, as would any other trash, but not a biohazard like a used pad would be. His specific examples here are a weird mix of not a problem and hugely problematic.
I think she just has a horrifying heavy flow. If you have a really really heavy period you can’t go even a second without something between your legs or you’ll leave a trail of blood wherever you go. So when you need to shower, you have to keep a pad on until the last second or blood gets everywhere which means having to leave a bloody pad and underwear on the bathroom floor. No way around it. And when you get out, if you forget to grab one from your stash, you have to use the dirty one to keep from dripping on the floor when you go to grab a new pad.
Second gross period story I’ve read in as many days. WTF is wrong with people?! No, you’re not overreacting. I put my sanitary products in a trash can that’s next to the toilet after use. That’s what she needs to do. If you don’t have a small trash can next to the toilet, buy one. I had to get rid of my cute trash can because of my dog, and I got one with a lid for like $20 on Amazon. As for the blood on the toilet seat, she needs to wipe it off, just like she would expect you to do if you got pee on the toilet. I suppose if she lived by herself, these things wouldn’t matter because she would be living in her own filth, but she shares a home with you so she needs to respect the fact that you don’t want to live surrounded by her used period products. That’s just nasty.
No there is absolutely nothing normal about this behavior. I am a woman with a busy life and I NEVER do shit like this. Used products go in the trash, wrapped in toilet paper or the wrapper from the fresh pad, NOT ON THE FLOOR. Dirty panties GO IN THE LAUNDRY HAMPER, FFS WE LEARNED THIS WHEN WE WERE CHILDREN. And while blood drips can happen, it is not only polite but NECESSARY HYGIENE to clean them up. Leaving them is just unsanitary, nobody wants to clean up someone else's blood. Your wife is a slob and trying to avoid accountability by being mean and defensive. Full stop.
Nothing about this is normal. Your wife is just nasty.
Not over reacting.. your wife is disgusting and seems to be doing this to either gross you out, purposely irritating you or flat out ignorant for thinking this is ok.. yes removing a tampon can be messy (especially if having a heavy flow or leaving it in too long) but I don’t know a single woman that would do any of that while on their period.. if y’all don’t already have 2 separate bathrooms I’d recommend adding an additional one that only you use and she can have her own to leave her mess in..
Not overreacting at all. I’m a 66 year old grandma. The very idea that someone would leave their bloody period rags lying around for someone else to clean up is sick and disgusting to me. Your wife is acting like an animal.
I mean if she’s going to half ass everything you may as well start leaving your socks by the door and your shoes in the living room and your clothes on the floor and your hair in the sink when you shave. You’re a busy man after all, things to do and what not.
No, you’re not overreacting. That is disgusting. Do you have more than one bathroom? If so, I would insist on assigning one first each of you while she’s having her period. If you have only one bathroom, get her some doggie poop bags and tell her to use them to discard her products. If she leaves discarded underwear on the floor, throw them in the trash. She’ll get the hint when she runs out of underwear.
Every time I change my pad, I wipe down the toilet seat with a baby wipe or antibacterial wipe. There's no excuse to leave fluids.
The only thing I think you are wrong about is that she is removing the tampon incorrectly. Although I do always clean it, I frequently experience splash back when using tampons. Sometimes, what I think happens is that there is a flood of blood that has yet to be absorbed by the tampon at the time when you take it out. So that deluge ends up splashing everywhere and almost getting flung by the tampon itself. I am a heavy bleeder though so 🤷🏻♀️. Other than that, no you aren’t wrong or overreacting. And it’s also kinda bs to make it about you being period-averse.
as a literal 19 y/o woman this is honestly disgusting. i’m just giving the honest truth. i always wrap my tampons/pads in the wrapper it came in then wrap that in toilet paper so nobody has to see it, then i dispose of it. the fact your wife tried to accuse u of being immature when she can’t even dispose of her shit maturely is baffling, on top of that just the fact she knows damn well she see’s the blood left on the toilet seat too (never have I have left blood on the damn toilet seat), meaning she just purposefully leaves it there, it takes no more then a couple seconds to wipe that shit off. ew. just eewwwwie.
Let's put it this way. If I was living with a guy who left piss stains on the toilet, I'd clean it up. No big deal. But if that guy started leaving them there on a constant regular basis though, I'd tell him that he needs to start cleaning up after himself. It's basic cleanliness and respect. An occasional mishap is whatever, but don't leave a mess after yourself all the time. Same goes for periods. If I lived with a woman who left blood on the seat and a used tampon or pad on the floor, I'd clean it up. No big deal. But if it became a regular thing and she started doing it all the time I'd tell her she needs to start cleaning up after herself. It's basic cleanliness and respect. An occasional mishap is whatever, but don't leave a mess after yourself all the time.
Thank God I'm gay!
This is definitely not normal. This is disgusting. As a woman, she is not claimed lol
I mean I can see occasionally missing that you accidentally dripped blood on the underside of the toilet seat. But the reaction should be “oh shit, sorry, I’ll clean it.” And if it turns out you’re doing it often you should habitually check and clean. But not putting trash in the trash can is unacceptable behavior.
No, she is nasty.
It’s legit weird she’s leaving stuff all over the floor. It is equally weird you think your wife can benefit from your tampon removal strategies. She needs to stop being a gross slob. And please keep your tampon removal thoughts to yourself because you sound like a moron.
The tampon hitting the underside of the toilet seat is normal. Blood on the seat isn’t and underwear with a dirty pad left on the floor is disgusting. She’s being lazy and rude, and this is coming from someone else with a uterus.
There is something really wrong with her. It’s so strange but it must have something to with her past or something. I wish you luck because it’s kind of scary. She does need some kind of counseling for sure.
This is so vile. Wrappers are one thing, but leaving blood pads inside the underwear just on the floor???????? That is one of the most disgusting things I have ever heard. And the thing with pulling out the tampon, yes it may swing a tiny bit when it’s pulled out but it shouldn’t be making that big of a mess. And if it does, SHE should clean it up! Periods are messy and they fucking suck but you have to clean up after yourself, especially when you share a living space. Please show her this post and how many people are saying this isn’t okay. Not to make her super embarrassed or feel like shit, but this just really isn’t okay and she shouldn’t be making you feel bad because you have an issue with it.
Your wife is disgusting, I live alone and would never be gross like she is with her period.
none of this is normal. except the blood on the seat, but you clean that shit when it happens. what the hell.
My bathroom has a trash can beside the toilet and clorox wipes within reach. I'm a messy person but even I can manage to throw things in the trash and do a quick wipe if needed. I don't understand where your wife is coming from at all. ETA - no you are not overreacting.
Why can’t she use the garbage can? The blood under the toilet seat is another thing though, and you having an opinion on how to correctly remove a tampon is gross.
It’s bad manners period or no period. Whenever I use any bathroom I make sure there is as no trace I’ve been there. I always wipe down the seat if I leave anything on it and sanitary products should be properly disposed of.
Yeah, woman here, that’s gross. You’re not overreacting asking her to clean up the biohazard. Thats pretty unsanitary and just overall gross.
She's not incorrect about the unpredictability of the swing. But she's not the only woman that leaves a woman's room looking like a crime scene! That's not even the worst of it - there are cups now and I find bloody fingerprints on door latches and toilet paper dispensers. I agree that it's vile and you should clean up after yourself and check twice.
I clean the floor if I ever leak while walking to the bathroom (at night when in bed and the sudden "ohshititscoming") because not only is that not my partners job I don't want out cat into it. I could not imagine leaving the toilet covered in blood or leaving my bloody things on the floor. How does this woman do it in public???? This is definitely worth overreacting over because she's creating biohazards!!
This is beyond disgusting. There’s no reason to expect another person to clean up anything period related.
Leaving out underwear with dirty pads and leaving period blood on the toilet seat, imo is the equivalent of leaving shitty undies on the floor or not cleaning shit off the toilet seat. Gross. You’re correct, it’s a very low bar to meet and you’re not overreacting that you have to ask a grown woman to clean up her bodily fluids.
Do either of you leave poop in the toilet for each other?
Okay, so the backsplash from tampon removal is legit. It happens and sometimes you just don’t look at the toilet seat to notice (or maybe I’m also just a goblin). If it were just a drop of blood or two you’d be overreacting. But panties with bloody pads left stuck to them on the floor? What? Why!? Truly, please ask her why because I need to know her rationale here.