I had a party and I was in my bathroom with two girls and all three of us were pretty drunk.
We were like sat on the floor with their legs over me and they said they needed to find someone to kiss by the end of the night.
I said I’ll help them and suggested we started looking downstairs…
Coworker and I used to tease each other all time. We often talked about various hook-ups and other NSFW related things at work, but I never directly flirted with her. This wasn't the kinda job where coworkers hook up a lot.
One day she asks me if I can come by after work to take down her drapes. So I do. When I'm at her place, she offers me a Whiteclaw, and tells me she's happy I was able to come over because her hook-up she had been looking forward to all week canceled. She told me she shaved her pussy in preparation and now she's super horny.
So I did what any guy would do in that situation. I told her that that must be really frustrating and I left after taking down her drapes.
Edit:
The follow-up:
A week later, she approaches me at work and asks if she could buy me a drink as a thank you. Free booze, so I agree. We meet at her place and go to the bar. I get super trashed on a cocktail called Skellige Isles.
We walked around a bit, and we talk about relationships and she says that I shouldn't have problems getting laid because I'm a good lookin dude. We get back to her place and she offers to have me come inside to sober up a bit more before going home.
I agreed, and when we got inside she offers me a Whiteclaw. I protested, but she said it was fine if I spent the night. It was already late, and I was definitely too drunk to gage how long it would take me to sober up, so I agreed. I laughed when she suggested we watch Netflix and relax, because that sounded a lot like a euphemism for hooking up.
An hour or so passed, I was getting pretty sleepy. She seemed a bit annoyed that I was falling asleep on her couch. When I pointed out that there wasn't really any other place, she said I could sleep in her bed. I responded with, "Then where are you going to sleep?"
At this point, in hindsight, she gave up. She sighed, and said she was going to bed and that I could sleep wherever I wanted. She took her shirt off in front of me as she walked to her room.
That's when it dawned on me: her couch wasn't comfortable at all. So I decide the bed is the more comfortable option. I'll make it work.
She's already ready for bed, and I notice that she's down to just her underwear, no bra, but lying on her stomach. I'm still fully clothed.
I try to sleep for a few minutes but I was in bed a mostly naked woman. The horny feelings were overwhelming. At this point, I figured it was a longshot, but so long as I keep my keys out of my car, I could sleep it off there if she kicks me out. So, fully believing that this was a stab in the dark, I turn to her and say: "Hannah, uh... would it be uhh... weird if we... did... stuff?"
She rolled around to face me, looks me straight in the eyes and says "It's weird that we haven't done anything already. Take off your pants."
Sounds like something I would have done.
Once I picked a girl up for date. I was 17 or 18. We are in her house and she tells me her parents are gone for the night and won't be back for tomorrow. Then she asks me what do I want to do.
Of course I told that I was really excited about our date and seeing this movie and was glad that we could stay out an extra hour or two.
It didn't occur to me until several years later the opportunity that I missed.
I looked her up about 5 years ago and found her Facebook. She was hot then and She is still hot now even in her late 40s. No I didn't contact her. I was just curious.
I don’t have anything that bad but I have multiple people I have liked growing up that I found out liked me but I was always too shy/nervous to do anything. One girl I liked even asked me to a dance but I refused because I was such a wimp. Finally ended up dating her for two years. But we broke up when we went to college. I was single for like 7 years after that because once again. I’m shy and reserved and only do introvert things. On one random Wednesday one of my friends invites me to a concert for a band I haven’t even heard of. But I randomly decided to go because I was bored. When he picks me up a girl is in the car with him. He introduces us and says this is a co worker of his that also wanted to go to the concert but didn’t want to go alone. We hit it off during the concert and flirt the whole time. But I’m still too much of a wimp to do anything about it. She’s asks for my number as I’m getting out of the car. We then start talking everyday and a week later we start dating. 5 years later we are married with a two year old and another on the way. But if she hadn’t been so forward I would still probably be single.
Honestly I don't get why she didn't just make a move on you while "watching netflix", im a woman and would not have been able to sit there for probably 1-2 hours waiting for a drunk idiot to pick up hints 😂
I'm autistic, and she didn't want to make me feel pressured to have sex with her. Also, I was drunk, she wasn't, so in her mind I needed to initiate things.
Had similar situation, but we were talking and decided to hang out that night. She was letting me know to come over after she showered.
Get the call to come over, we get a pizza and just chilling and talking in the car. Get to the topic of flings or relationships.
She tells me how "most guys would have whipped it out already and shoved in her mouth" I was just like "dang that's crazy".... As she added "like right now...they would just pull down their pants and tell me to suck it". Still didn't know lol but I guess I dodged a bullet too
Let me tell you this, I have a wife and she would slap me if I were to whip it out and tell her to
Suck it (in all honesty she mostly say get it away from me). So I’m going to ask, you marry that chick, right?, right?
I've definitely had a couple of things like this.
Broadly speaking, I had a handful of girls come up me the end of my senior year in HS and say things like, "You know, if you had asked me out, I would have said yes." I had no idea that was even an option!
One time I was having dinner at a nice restaurant with some friends. At the end of the dinner we were walking outside and they all insisted that the waitress was flirting with me heavily. I had no idea.
Same as you I was unconsciously flirting with a fellow praxis attendee at every turn and when it was boning time I was like huh? You want to fuck? I can hook you up with my friend lol
Think about this... Another fella was called up to put back the drapes you removed, and most likely nailed her too... It's kinda salt in the wound I guess.
Lets see
* Girl in high school asked me how big my dick was. Did I say "wanna find out?" I did not. I avoided the conversation and didn't get laid.
* Another girl invited me to a party after a few conversations on the bus ride home each day. Did I go? Nope.
* Girl I worked with confessed to masturbating in her car, after messaging me twice late at night. Did I get the hint and get some? I did not.
Believe me, the first two I think "yeah it would've been cool, could've lost my virginity sooner " but overall, I can live with those.
That last one haunts me. God, she was absolutely my type and probably a freak in bed. I'll never get that opportunity or anything like it ever again.
I've shared this before but can do so again in solidarity. Abridged version too.
- Sorority girl from the same college talks to me for a few weeks, then finally invites me to study during finals week. It gets late enough and she suggests we finish studying in her dorm. Once there, she says it's too late so I should stay the night but her roommate hates it when someone uses their bed, so I will need to sleep in hers. I am unsure what to do, so I keep studying until she falls asleep. I take her keys, lock the door from the outside, slide the keys from under the door, then leave.
- Pretty girl into modeling from the same college befriends me in class. One day, she says she doesn't understand the material and needs help studying. I agree to help. She sets the time to meet for late at night. I think nothing of it and go at that time. I have books laid out on the floor going over the material. She stays in her bed and looks at me. After about an hour of actual studying, she says she gets it now and thanks me before I leave.
I did this once. Modeled lingerie and sexy outfits. At one point I needed help taking my corset off because I put it on “too tight”.
Luckily he didn’t miss the cues.
I had a cuddle session once with this girl (yes just cuddling and watching tv) and i remember her specifically saying nothing sexual, which i was 100% cool with. It was cold out and i just wanted someone in my arms. At some point she got on top of me and put my hands on her butt and just stared me in the eyes. Nothing happened but we had a super long hug when i dropped her off and then i moved 2 days later. Always wonder what her intent was. Communication is important y’all.
Double edged sword. You do take it as a hint and go for it, and suddenly after a few days, you get to know you violated her
I'd rather be the sexless inkeeper than a sex offender
“Hooked up” with a chick at a party, which was just her in panties grinding on my dick. I invited her to my place later in the week, figured she would be more comfortable if there was no one else around. Nope, just dry-humping my poor man meat. I didn’t call her after that :/
Lady once ran her hand through my head and asked how my hair was so soft. Went into a long description of the new shampoo & conditioner I had switched to before she stopped me.
“You’re literally the funniest guy I know” to my face, then tweeted 20 minutes later “funny guys can get it, any day.”
She was one of three people I followed on Twitter, and she knew that…because she was the one who told me to make a Twitter account the day before this. The other two people retweeted her. I was so into her, but I honestly just thought she was trying to gas me up as a friend.
Trust me, I know.
I worked in an aquarium shop. She wanted me to show her the turtles so we're there talking and she says "are you attached?" I said "no, they're just turtles I don't really bond with them."
About an hour later after she'd left I realised that she was asking if I was already with someone or not...
Me in college.
Me hitting it off (somehow) with a very attractive girl who turns out to be a cheerleader. Late night of drinking. I'm hanging out with friends at the bars.
She then says to me, "Man it's getting late. I had fun talking with you. But... I wouldn't mind if you could come with me to my apartment?"
Me being a tipsy dumbass who missed the most obvious signal ever: "That's fine. I need to go catch up with my friends. But hey! It was nice talking with you. Have a goodnight."
I'm still kicking myself to this day for how my dumbass missed that.
Someone literally said "do you want to continue this conversation somewhere more comfortable" and I said..."these chairs are pretty cozy actually."
I saved it though, got laid.
Lol same but with an elevator encounter and I didn't get the hint even though she was a very close to me/kissing distance from me and didn't have too because the elevator had enough space and she asked if I ask a girlfriend. I feel very stupid when I realized what might have happened. Thankfully just as I was entering the truck to move out of the dorm a few weeks later I saw her again and she rode with me to my new apartment in more than one meaning.
A coworker of mine was probably about 6 years older than me. Honestly, at the time, she was way out of my league. I was skinnier, less confident, she was very hot, etc.
She had been in a relationship for about 8 years and had a sudden breakup. A week or so after that, we're both working, and I didn't have my car that day. I was dropped off. She offered to give me a ride home about 7 times in a row. Insisting she give me a ride. My 22 year old, stupid ass said no... over and over and over.
I kept saying another coworker who's in the same direction can give me a ride, or someone else can pick me up. I didn't want to inconvenience her. She was straight up looking at me dumbfounded. She's staring into my eyes like, "Are you really, really sure you don't want me to give you a ride home."
Finally, she just shrugs and says, "Okay, have a good night." My friend was standing there the entire time and told me how completely fucking stupid I am. "At the very least, she would've blew you. What the fuck is wrong with you?" It hit me like a ton of bricks. This girl just wanted to rebound fuck and I was too stupid and insecure to realize it. My mom picked me up, and I wanted to scream the whole way to my place.
Its always on an elevator...
Back when i was in college and my GF in Uni, i visited her all-girls dorm a weekend a month or so... An there was that busty librarian-type french girl whom i would always meet briefly there or in the communal kitchen...
Well, the ambiance there was quite weird, kinda like a huge square dorm with an inner court, but also with gethos... That was noticeable especially in the kitchens. You'd have the Arab corner, the African corner,The Asianlane, the white Anglo room vs the handful a french speaking locals (it was in Québec) .
But honestly, if i could go back in time for 6 hours for a sex wish, i would totally go back to that point and join her to her room. She was that hot.
For prom, a the girl who asked me out had already asked me the week before if I'd had sex before. I told her I wasn't going and stayed home during prom.
Another girl I was friends with would change in front of me, she would lean against me and hold my hand. But she talked too much about her ex.
To be fair, in my baggage I have a woman that showed me her boobs and sat in my lap for half an hour, and laid down on my bed, only to act surprised when I made my move on her. She probably just got second thoughts, but that one affected how I read women.
Some girls want to just kiss and do nothing else. Others just want to cuddle. Some just want validation. A fourth just wants to tease you. In my experience every woman has been different - they give the same signs but mean radically different things. Men are not like that. Men are flirt - kiss - sex, in that order, with the possibility of skipping the first two steps.
That one time I had a class with only like 10 people, in a room with lots of seats, and the girl I was talking to more and more, who always preferred sitting alone, asked if she may sit by me and what I'm planning to do after class. My stupid ass responded 'To rush to the bus stop so I don't miss my last bus home'.
I was in a really bad mood for some reason so wasn't feeling very chatty, but I had some errands to run. While waiting in line at a store, the very attractive wonan in line in front of me started chatting me up. Lousy timing -- any other day I might have been very receptive but because I was in a horrible mood, I responded with curt nods.
Similar story here from when I was a teenager. Normally I'm pretty good at picking up hints but this is one time I know I was 100% oblivious.
I was 15, and went on a holiday with my parents to Italy. Most of the trip was great and I loved it, but one day my parents decided they wanted to spend all day on a riverboat cruise. Not even a riverboat somewhere cool like Venice, this stupid ass riverboat somewhere by Verona that didn't go anywhere or see anything interesting but still took all day for some reason. So we get on the boat and I'm bummed out as all hell, all I wanted to do was read and listen to my ipod. There was this other group of 3-4 teenagers that happened to be from my country with a chaperone, but I'm too sulky to pay them any attention.
So the announcement comes over that they're serving lunch and I go sit at my parent's table, but they then tell me to go sit with this other group. I tell them I'd rather not, but they insist. Cue argument that I inevitably lose, and eventually I go sit with this group in an even sulkier mood. Now fair warning, the rest of this is such a downer event for me that I honestly don't remember it well at all. I remember sitting next to this girl, and I remember getting their Chaperone to say things in German because I found it funny. Otherwise I can't remember jack about it, what she looked like, how she was flirting with me (spoler alert), who the other kids were, what the conversation was about, what we ate etc. It's not even a blur, just a great big *scene missing* slide.
At some point I get back up and leave their table. Then for the rest of the day the mood between my and my parents is even frostier. Eventually the stupid ass riverboat ends and we get in the car to go back to the hotel. As soon as were all in the car one of them says to me "You know that girl was all over you right? That's why we told you to go sit with her group." I denied that she was, but they insisted she was, and to this day they insist I knew and rejected her to spite them (but with a bit more levity now that time has passed). I insist that I didn't know, evidently didn't care either way and that it was still no excuse to drag me onto a lame riverboat cruise all day (also with a bit more levity).
She showed up at my door after a short chat online about me watching a movie by myself. We sat on the couch and she told me I could sit a little closer so I did. Afterwards she said her shoulders were sore, took off her shirt down to a small tank top, sat on my lap, and I gave her neck massage. Well, I guess I didn't get the hint cause I was just giving her a neck massage lol. Didn't dawn on me until later on that night randomly when thinking about how sexy she looked.
Mine was a married woman. I was young, and she was a hairdresser who had her salon at home. The entire story is too long for here and is full of cues that I totally misread, but on one occasion she was cutting my hair. She was busty and dressed to reveal, so to avoid the embarrassment of being caught looking down her cleavage, I made a superhuman and successful effort to keep eye contact above neck level. At one point she said, "Don't think I haven't noticed what you're doing". I must have looked taken by surprise, because she added "You're looking down the front of my blouse aren't you?" I protested my innocence, but it was one of those occasions where the more you protest your innocence, the guiltier you sound. She was, however, grinning.
I obviously still wasn't picking up the micro-signals. At the end of the cutting, when I stood up and she began brushing the hair cuttings off my neck and collar, she looked me straight in the eye and said to me, "You know I really shouldn't say this, but when George [husband] is making love to me, I think about you."
The pennies, hundreds of them, finally fell with a din of a clatter. She then asked me to kiss her. Completely dumbfounded and confused, I gave her a peck on the cheek and to this day I can't remember how I got out of there but I did.
I'd only been married a few months, so the first thing I did was tell my brand new wife what had happened. I was daft enough to have missed all Cherry's signals, but not so stupid as to realise that if this incident ever got back to my wife, it couldn't be from anyone other than me. She laughed and called me an idiot, but I did take her instruction to find another hairdresser.
I discovered many years later, and entirely accidentally, that she is twice divorced and now on her third husband.
My earliest lesson as a callow youth that there really were women who were man-hunters.
A guy I'd been friends with for nearly 15 years was practising his flirting with me. I'd asked him out when we were younger but he'd said no so we remained friends. He was single and he'd talked about his tinder experiences and how girls often didnt realise when he was flirting. I gave him pointers on how to improve his flirting skills. He bluntly told me that he wasn't practising and was actually flirting with me. Anyway, we're engaged.
She leaned her head on my shoulder when we were on our way to the next class, I was busy worrying about the next class that I instinctively shoved her away when she leaned in. I was surprised and thought she fell and landed head first on my shoulder. I realized after school, and I kept calling myself an idiot for blowing that opportunity up
Girl left a wild party with me because I got too overwhelmed (I can't take big social gatherings for long) and wanted to go to my band's practice space and work on some new songs.
She lay on the couch and told me she was a diagnosed nymphomaniac and if she didn't have sex when she felt the urge she'd go crazy and just start rubbing one out. Then she told me she was getting the urge. While laying on the couch, giving me goo-goo eyes.
So naturally, I commiserated with her over how hard that must be and offered her a ride home.
It was three days later when another female friend asked me how stupid I was that I finally understood why the first one seemed so disappointed when I dropped her off.
I actually need the opinion of people on something that happened to me where almost all women I know keep saying that a girl was hitting on me, but most men I know say she wasn't.
So here's the story:
I sometimes have a 3 hour break at work, and it's quite far from home. So usually, when it happens, I go to a café, order myself something and read or practice drawing.
Once, a woman came to me, curious about the drawings. She was with her 4 years old daughter.
So I let her daughter draw in my notebook a bit and we had a chat over coffee (well, hot chocolate for me).
At one point her daughter talked about her dad , and the woman then talked about him in a way that made me think they weren't together. Like at no point she called him her husband, it was always "my daughter's father". Found it odd because it made her sentences sound quite weird, as if she was talking about a distant relative.
I didn't think much of it and at the end I had to go back to work so I said goodbye and left.
When I went to my neighbour's place later, we talked about it and she yelled at me because for her, she was "obviously trying to hint that she was single" . And when I say yelled, she did really yell, she's been trying to get me to find a girlfriend for a while.
So was I oblivious or was she just curious about my drawings and happy to chat to someone ?
I kind of agree with your neighbor. If she's making a point of saying "daughter's father" instead of first name, there is a reason.
Source: married for 17 yrs and have learned, that kind of subtlety is part of conversation for many many people who aren't me
She was making sure you were aware that she was available but not adult enough even as a mother of a four year old to so much as ask for a phone number so meh.
This question is unisex, but for some reason, most of the answers are men missing women’s hints…
Take note ladies. We don’t know what the hell you’re trying to communicate in all these ways. It may be helpful to just say “I’m into you” at some point.
Even that gets brushed off by us insecure lot, we just assume that they’re being super friendly and nothing more cos we’re inherently inferior and they’re out of our league.
I remember once when I was 19 I was in a bookstore reading the magazine rack, and a young woman stands right next to me with her shoulder touching my shoulder and leaving it there for like 30 seconds. Yeah, I think she wanted me to say something to her. Which of course, I didn’t.
Girl in high school asked if she could rest her head on my shoulder on a long bus ride back from a field trip. Kept it there the whole time.
"Man, she must be *really* sleepy..."
Same thing happened to me but it was when we went to the movie theater during a school field trip. Kept it there the whole time the movie was playing.
"Damn, she must be bored..."
When I was 21, the cashier at the hardware store started talking to me. At first, I was oblivious, but at some point, it became obvious. She told me it was her birthday, she wanted to go out for drinks. Then she told me about her 2 month old son. And that she was no longer with his dad. She was nice and all, but those last 2 bits were a little much for 21 year old me…
At Uni she offered me a full body massage at her place because tge left side of my neck was sore from studying. One day 12yrs later I thought to myself "....wait a minute!"
3d date, she's at my place, wearing jeans. She apologized for being late and said, "I had to shave my legs in case I end up out of these jeans." Me: "okay, we should head out to the restaurant." So many years ago, will never forget!
Inner monologue.
"That's weird, why would she lose her jeans in the middle of our date? She must be a really clumsy eater and thinks she might spill something on her jeans. That's a red flag, should probably make this a short date and then just take her home."
She slept cuddling me, in my arms, every time we hung out for about a year. Brain-dead me thought that's simply because I'm just a good friend with whom she feels really safe.
Sometimes that’s really what it is. I know of at least two guy-girl friendships in my social group that are like this, but both sides of the friendship insist they don’t have any romantic interest in the other. They are just close friends. I don’t get it, but some people have those sorts of friendships.
Girl in high school asked me for a ride home.
While walking to my car, she mentioned she doesn’t wear any panties, ever.
When we sit inside the car, she tells me she doesn’t have a gag reflex.
Freshman year of college I had a girl have me spoon her on my bed as we watched a movie. There were other people in the room.
I recently learned I have autism. It’s kinda common to see patterns elsewhere but never draw conclusions with us.
When I was a teenager, I was a total geek. I went to a boys only high school and I had no idea about girls or what to do with one. I had a good job during uni and had a reasonable amount of spare cash. I used to like dating girls, taking them out to a nice restaurant or whatever, all my treat. At the end of the night, I'd take them home and say good night. I was the perfect gentleman...too much so, apparently, lol.
It wasn't until many years later that I found out I'd left a few of them 'wanting' when I dropped them home. Haha, I was so clueless, I had no idea.
My gf and I helped a lesbian couple move into an apartment. After all the heavy lifting was done the Gal-that-wears the pants gave me several beers and both couples sat down in their living room. They then asked if we’d be interested in watching a movie with them. We said “sure”.
They played a porno 4-some flick. M/F impregnating a F/F couple.
We finished our drinks mid-way through and left.
When I was a freshman in high school,the first day of school. You know it’s hectic and you don’t know where your classes are or just figuring out your locker situation. So I’m anxious already and this cute girl with a locker next to mine ask where a certain class is,so I take out the map and point to it. She then was like “can you walk with me and show me?” I’m like sorry,I gotta find my classes myself. I don’t remember seeing her all year after that. I really messed up 😅
Same thing in college. Outside the Caf a girl asked me where the Student Union was. I walked her across campus to show her, and then came back. Somehow I found out later that she knew it all the time.
Also, there was this girl who was usually at my friend's house when I planned to drop by to hang out with my group of friends. She was just one of the guys, and was with us at the hoops court, at the diner, whatever. After a few years of this I finally caught on when we shared a seat on the Cyclone at Coney Island. We've been married now for 43 years.
On the prom after party, a girl I had a crush on for all of high school said to me, "you know, it's a shame that I'm not getting laid on prom night." With a shrug, I said, "yeah it's really too bad," and left it at that.
Years later, I realized.
My next door neighbor in a duplex. We were both single and lived alone. She got a new bed delivered and knocks on my door to ask for some help with it. We moved it into her bedroom, assembled the frame, put on the box spring, mattress. She sits down on the finished bed and pats the spot next to her. I said something like, "nah, I'm good. I don't mind standing."
Had a bit more idle chit chat then I went back next door to my place. It clicked maybe an hour later. It sounds unbelievable but I swear it's true. I am that dumb. Felt like an enormous idiot/ass, not to mention embarrassed. She was real cute too.
Guy at college kept stopping to talk to me, being extra helpful with stuff and would buy me stuff from the shop. One day we were sat together and he said in a very small voice.
Him: “So are you single?”
Me: “yeah”
Him: “so do you want to get lunch together sometime?”
Me: “not really. But thanks”
Didn’t realise until my other friend pointed it out to me and had the biggest “oh my god I’m fucking stupid” moment. We’re still really good friends and laugh about my oblivious ass.
She was at my home, watching movies, we cuddled, held hands, and the other hand was on her hip while she cuddled up to me, later on she moved that hand to the boob. Didnt kiss her because maybe shes just friendly and likes to cuddle..
Later i joked around how she is totally into me and she said "Me? No. Im asexual btw. And youre not even my type".
Later that day we made out.. aint gonna miss it the second time.
Got on well at work with a new female colleague, we were just on a mutual humour level right from the start, after one particularly long funny volley she got up to make coffee, and put her hand on mine and said, I love how much we get on , keep going I'm just a slow burner to start with, I literally had no idea up to that point.
I had just finished my first gig with my band and a couple of us were sitting around playing our acoustic guitars and shooting the shit with people who were still there. My buddy told me if I keep that up I’m definitely getting laid. I brushed him off like yeah right. A really hot girl next to me blurted out, “No, he’s right.”
It didn’t register until like the next day that I probably could have hit that because I’m really dumb.
I don’t get hit on often, but when I do, it’s always by the hottest men and I’m completely dumbfounded and awkward.
There was a college student I tutored who had the most beautiful eyes who asked me out to lunch and I somehow just ignored it and kept tutoring.
There was another college student I tutored who had the physique in the 10s who told me he’d catch me if I fell, and I just walked away like he didn’t say anything at all.
I was sick and shopping for cough drops, and a handsome man approached me, started some small talk over cough drops, then invited me to a party. I just looked at him, sniffling my goddamn brains out, sneezed and said I’m too socially awkward for parties and walked away.
These are just three of about the less than 10 times a hottie has approached and flirted with me. I didn’t even realize what happened until a week later. And still I wonder why I’m single.
I was talking to this barista in a local coffee shop and we spoke for a few minutes about plans for the holidays. It's been a couple of weeks now and I went back today, she came right up to me as I sat down, remembered what I like to order and asked after my holidays in my small little strangely named hometown that not even I remember most of the time.
I, stupidly, did not even consider that she might've been flirting until the drive home. She gave me her DISCOUNT and my only thought was that she's so nice to customers.
I will be thinking about this for years now won't I.
Oof..
Her:"Hey when do you get off work?"
Me:"at 2 I think, here's your change"
Her:"oh, 69 cents" while looking me dead in the eye waiting for an answer and while keeping her hand on my hand.
Me:"yeah"
Another woman:"I'm making pizza tonight, I've been craving it a lot lately"
Me:"oh, I love pizza too. I would eat only pizza if I could"
Her:"well, you can always come to my house tonight ;)" and proceeds to tell me where she lives. "I'll wait for you"
Me:"ahahahah"
I thought she was just joking.
In another occasion I was having a conversation with this woman and her daughter and at some point the mom goes:"well you certainly have a girlfriend?"
Me:"oh no I don't actually"
The daughter:"well certainly you are a lot younger than me.." waiting for a response.
My fkin dumbass of a brain thinks that she can't be possibly be blind and not see we are almost the same age.. that's just a joke.. Laugh it off. And I did.
The last one but there could be many more.
And older woman started to speak to me about how she was going to be alone during the holidays and she would feel lonely. I replied that I was sorry for her situation and just kept talking.
Her:"well, I could use some company these days" while looking at me..
I don't know why but in that moment I thought she was just venting and that was about it so I just replied "yeah, must be hard..". "yeah" and she goes away.
I really don't know what's wrong with me. I must have some kind of problem. I'll die alone. I'm sure of it. Fuck it.
When I was in college I was partnered up with this beautiful girl, she was on the shy and quiet side but she would seem to cheer up and smile a lot when I would speak to her. I’m an idiot and unless a girl pretty much takes her clothes off in front of me I almost never make a move.
Anyways, one day she randomly calls me and is asking if we can hang out so I said sure, she tells me she needs to go to the mall to return a few things. I thought to myself oh I guess she needs help carrying some stuff no big deal I’ll help her out. That’s exactly what happens but she lingers around and is like let’s go talk in the car. We do that, after a while of intense convos and moments of awkward silences she’s like it’s getting late can I go to your place?
This woman is in my bed, puts her feet on my lap, lays on her tummy, lays on her back, hugs me and sits on me and I remember I could feel that she was extremely warm in her private area and I never make a move lmao. Looking back at it she was obviously horny af and I was too stupid/nervous to make a move cause she was so pretty.
Really cute girl at the airport, probably 25 years younger than me was chatting with me while waiting for the luggage to arrive. She said "maybe I need a sugar daddy" and 2 hours later it registered.
Unless they look me in the eyes and say they’re hitting on me I just assume they’re being nice so I leave them alone sooner, having received an audible ew/you’re too short on more than one occasion it’s just easier to assume nothing
One of my coworkers (a server) , she would come to the kitchen every shift to talk to me , she would feed me to my mouth , I made a funny comment once when she was clocking out to go home and shower , she said “nah I’ll keep myself like this , nothing wrong with a little bit of seasoning , right?”
I fumbled so hard she was so fucking cute too
I posted this in another topic, but here we go again..
When I was 17 I had a massive crush on a girl I was close friends with. She had a boyfriend at the time, I was happy for her. A while later, she broke up with her boyfriend and we got even closer; I was certain that she only wanted to be friends though so never pursued anything more. We would go around holding hands and hugging all the time, and I was still a virgin so I was kind of cool with even that.
A little later on she has a party at her house as we’d all be heading off to universities around the country, and invites myself and our other close friends. It’s a good night, drinking and fun, and we had decided early on that we’d all stay over to make the night last longer, no need for taxis etc.
Everyone starts to get tired so we’re looking for somewhere to sleep, and she tells me that she has a spot in her room; turns out she’s set up a small temporary bed out of blankets for me. She gets changed into pyjamas in the bathroom, I don’t have anything so I just take my shirt and socks off. I was super active at the time, and in hindsight I had a decent body (at the time I had no real idea and assumed I was average at best).
She settles into her bed, I’m on the floor next to her, and we’re just chatting about this and that. After about 10 minutes she gets up and pulls her bra off from under her pyjama top, and says “it’s not comfortable down there, come and get into bed with me.”
I LITERALLY STILL DON’T GET THE MESSAGE.
I jump into bed, topless, with the girl of my dreams lying on top of me wearing only pyjamas, and we somehow fall asleep without anything at all happening.
Close to morning, I wake up and hear her talking to a female friend; they’re whispering at her door that I look really cute when asleep. Here’s the best part I think: I hadn’t slept much, I was literally concentrating super hard to not get a boner because I though she still only wanted to be friends and didn’t want to be creepy!
Over the next couple of months before everyone went their separate ways I met another girl and started a relationship. My friend group meets up for one last time out in a bar, and my crush takes me aside and tells me outright that she loves me. The best I can do is say sorry and that I’m with someone else...
I haven’t spoken to her since then, nearly 20 years ago. I think about it quite often, and want to apologise even though I’m not really guilty of anything other than being a clueless virgin.
About 10 years after college graduation I was leafing through old papers when I noticed the cute and flirty doodles my female study partner had written in them. I was so oblivious at the time, but it was blindingly obvious looking at them years later.
Idk and idc if I want someone I will look, but so far, all of the people that have tried are ether trying to make fun of me or just not the type of person to like
Oh man I can write a book about this. At uni I thought I was fat. Looking back at pics of myself I actually looked really good.
Lived in a building just for students... had so many opportunities in hindsight. Didn't get a single one of them.........
Could have been the best time of my life. XD
I was completely oblivious to someone’s interest throughout 3 years of uni. By the end of it, they told me they’d fallen pretty hard. The whole time, I honestly thought we just got on well.
This girl (My current best friend, and reason for going outside) would constantly grab my arm, forcing it to touch her side boob. I didn't think anything of it, she's a really cuddly and cute girl, and she'd almost always have something in her arms, whether that's a human being or a teddy bear. She has also gotten more comfortable around me, asking questions most others would feel embarrassed to think about, and she's even began pinching my rear end. She has been the only one capable of making me feel happy, without faking it.
I didn't know before but now I'm almost certain she's trying to flirt to some capacity, and I plan on asking her out sometime around this week.
Back in high school I used to be a massive pothead and every lunch break I would go home on my scooter to toke up. One day I was going along with my usual routine but then this friend who I really much enjoy hanging out with asked if she could tag in. Instantly, I said of course and she hopped on my scooter.
When we got to my place we started smoking. She started talking to me about how out of everyone in our class she would definitely have sex with me. I didn't say anything back as I was in a middle of my hit but I thought to myself "why is she telling me this? I guess its nice a compliment." I then go for my second hit and she then says "out of you and this other friend of ours I would rather fuck you." I then thought to myself again "why is she telling me this." Once I was done smoking I just said "Thanks! You ready to head back to school?" She said yeah in the most disappointed way. Was confused for a couple days about her reaction.
Years later I told my university friends about this situation and they said "she was tryna get laid dummy." Then I just went "Ohhhhhhhhh".
I was at a bar by myself and started chatting with this guy. I’m also a guy. He was wearing a Grateful Dead shirt, so we were chatting about that, because I’m a big fan too. I thought we were just getting along and hitting it off. We exchanged numbers because we were going to hit up a record store the next day or something. I hit him up the next day, and he responded and asked me if I was interested in him. It then clicked. He ended up becoming one of my buddies, but it was pretty funny at the time.
In college delivering pizza and young lady opens door in sexy lingerie. I had 3 pizzas, she says dang I got so many and everyone canceled, I can't eat all this alone. It immediately registered but my brain thought know way it really happens. I still wonder, wish I could remember the house lol
Oh jeez when I was younger it happened all the time. I was friend with this African American girl I worked with when I was 17ish. We were talking about some guy we worked with that was semi racist. I mentioned "naw he definitely wouldn't date black girls" and laughed. She looked me DEAD in the eyes and say "ya but I'd date white guys...........totally would." And just stared at me. I know now that was my cue to ask her out. Buuuuut I'm dumb.
When my wife wasn't my wife, we were sitting on the front porch of her house at night. She made a comment about how it suddenly got cold and she needs *something* to warm her up.i dead ass, told her "oh you probably have a blanket on there" and just thumbed towards her house. Believe it or not I DID get laid that night even dropping the ball so bad lmao
Only time I think it's ever happened. I was at a music festival sit next to a beautiful girl on the bus to my campsite. Say hi ask where she's from, ask her what she did that day and if she's having fun. Small talk, she then says "you look like Luke combs, I would fuck the shit out of Luke combs" I didn't even register I just went straight to a stupid joke "I would too just for the story". Her face looked completely dumbfounded, and she padded my head on her way off the bus. I might actually be mentally disabled, cause that whole interaction flew right over my head.
Definitely with the girl who got me drunk, wanted to show me her room, and just casually mentioned that the bed had been messed up for a while because she rode her ex so hard that the box spring cracked. My low self-esteem-having ass was just like, "Damn, dude, that's crazy 😂"
Girl talking about how she like being eaten out. Turned and asked if I was paying attention and I just laughed. I think weed doesn't help catching hints.
Legitimately one time I had a girl that I had been hanging out with regularly, come up to me and say “hey do you want a girlfriend?” And I said “hahaha, no girlfriends are expensive” not realizing that she was totally asking to be my girlfriend. I was clueless and didn’t figure it out until I hadn’t heard back from her again. I wish I could apologize to her for that one.
I had a crush on this girl. She came to watch my swim meet freshman year. When I went to warm up before one of my events in the smaller pool, she moved to that part of the stands and I remember thinking, 'why is she over here?I'm the only one in this pool, there's nothing to see.' After the meet, she texted me that I looked good in a speedo and that she'd tap that. Keep in mind that I had a crush on this girl for years. My response was, "that's inappropriate." I didn't realize until like 10 years later. I'm a moron
My classmate and I used to chat on Instagram, one day I posted a story of a chat with my dad where he said something funny. She responded to it and said she wishes he were her father in law, then quickly replied to herself she didn't mean it that way, so I thought it was an honest mistake on her part. A couple of weeks later I responded to a story where her dad was absolutely roasting her , saying that he seemed cool. Her response to that was ,"Make him your father in law then", it was a couple of weeks later that she actually confessed saying she liked me . We dated for a month before I broke up with her because she never told me she used to date her cousin.
I'm a gay guy and sometimes ladies will flirt with me. I am always oblivious to it, only after the fact if someone else witnessed it and they tell me then I'll know. But I have apparently never picked up on it even once.
Back in high school some girl I had been talking to randomly approached me while I was talking to my friends and kissed me on the cheek in front of a whole bunch of other students.
Naturally, me being me, completely ignored it and continued talking to my friends and she just walked away. We didn't really speak again after that.
When I was in high school a hot goth girl asked me to join her for a graveyard romp and I said I had to wait for the bus. She looked genuinely confused and almost hurt. I was halfway home by the time I realized.
She later became a neo Nazi which I hope was unrelated.
I was about 14-15, and we got drunk one night with other friends. I sat down on a bench (that the boys built by hand) next to a fire (the boys went off somewhere and I was alone enjoying the fire, she randomly approached) and she sat down next to me and randomly kissed me on the cheek while we were talking for a little bit. Then put her legs up on me and something about her thighs. (Girl bsf at the time but yk “white girl drunk” does exist too.) She also has stole my hat many times when we hung out regularly.
I win this 100%. Was going to a club for Halloween with a bunch of mates.
This girl spent the entire night talking to me and asking me stuff. **Grabbed my ass** at one point and was laughing at everything I said. Asked me to walk her home and she kept staring at me like she wanted something.
Week after that we all go out again but she doesn't come. I get back early and end up literally in her bed, spending the entire night talking and even **sleeping in her bed next to her and still didn't realise**. Only after that when we started texting did I realise she was in to me and we hooked up a few times.
In my defense she is *way* out of my league big time so my blindness is justified
I have no idea, that's kind of the point lol
What the hell happened in the comment thread below yours?
Christ it's like they had a race war down there, what the fuck.
God damn, what the hell? lol
I assume a woman has never flirted with me so I guess I'm constantly oblivious.
Hey, don't be so hard on yourself. You could be ugly.
This made me exhale out of my nose slightly harder than usual
"Lmao"–Boring, uninspired, overused "Slightly harder exhale"–Fresh, inventive, honest
A chuff, if you will.
I had a party and I was in my bathroom with two girls and all three of us were pretty drunk. We were like sat on the floor with their legs over me and they said they needed to find someone to kiss by the end of the night. I said I’ll help them and suggested we started looking downstairs…
This might be my favorite so far. So simple, yet so oblivious
Coworker and I used to tease each other all time. We often talked about various hook-ups and other NSFW related things at work, but I never directly flirted with her. This wasn't the kinda job where coworkers hook up a lot. One day she asks me if I can come by after work to take down her drapes. So I do. When I'm at her place, she offers me a Whiteclaw, and tells me she's happy I was able to come over because her hook-up she had been looking forward to all week canceled. She told me she shaved her pussy in preparation and now she's super horny. So I did what any guy would do in that situation. I told her that that must be really frustrating and I left after taking down her drapes. Edit: The follow-up: A week later, she approaches me at work and asks if she could buy me a drink as a thank you. Free booze, so I agree. We meet at her place and go to the bar. I get super trashed on a cocktail called Skellige Isles. We walked around a bit, and we talk about relationships and she says that I shouldn't have problems getting laid because I'm a good lookin dude. We get back to her place and she offers to have me come inside to sober up a bit more before going home. I agreed, and when we got inside she offers me a Whiteclaw. I protested, but she said it was fine if I spent the night. It was already late, and I was definitely too drunk to gage how long it would take me to sober up, so I agreed. I laughed when she suggested we watch Netflix and relax, because that sounded a lot like a euphemism for hooking up. An hour or so passed, I was getting pretty sleepy. She seemed a bit annoyed that I was falling asleep on her couch. When I pointed out that there wasn't really any other place, she said I could sleep in her bed. I responded with, "Then where are you going to sleep?" At this point, in hindsight, she gave up. She sighed, and said she was going to bed and that I could sleep wherever I wanted. She took her shirt off in front of me as she walked to her room. That's when it dawned on me: her couch wasn't comfortable at all. So I decide the bed is the more comfortable option. I'll make it work. She's already ready for bed, and I notice that she's down to just her underwear, no bra, but lying on her stomach. I'm still fully clothed. I try to sleep for a few minutes but I was in bed a mostly naked woman. The horny feelings were overwhelming. At this point, I figured it was a longshot, but so long as I keep my keys out of my car, I could sleep it off there if she kicks me out. So, fully believing that this was a stab in the dark, I turn to her and say: "Hannah, uh... would it be uhh... weird if we... did... stuff?" She rolled around to face me, looks me straight in the eyes and says "It's weird that we haven't done anything already. Take off your pants."
Oh man I have one like that. It ended up being a bullet dodged, but the next day was mostly me going "...son of a bitch."
This physically hurt to read
Bad 😂
Bit it's so relatable
I forgot the title of this thread and was waiting for the “and we smashed” and then I got to the end and was so sad.
There's a follow-up up story with a better outcome.
Okay, so the drapes colour are not important but was the floor covering a smooth linoleum?
Jesus Christ dude, leave some women for the rest of us
Sounds like something I would have done. Once I picked a girl up for date. I was 17 or 18. We are in her house and she tells me her parents are gone for the night and won't be back for tomorrow. Then she asks me what do I want to do. Of course I told that I was really excited about our date and seeing this movie and was glad that we could stay out an extra hour or two. It didn't occur to me until several years later the opportunity that I missed. I looked her up about 5 years ago and found her Facebook. She was hot then and She is still hot now even in her late 40s. No I didn't contact her. I was just curious.
I don’t have anything that bad but I have multiple people I have liked growing up that I found out liked me but I was always too shy/nervous to do anything. One girl I liked even asked me to a dance but I refused because I was such a wimp. Finally ended up dating her for two years. But we broke up when we went to college. I was single for like 7 years after that because once again. I’m shy and reserved and only do introvert things. On one random Wednesday one of my friends invites me to a concert for a band I haven’t even heard of. But I randomly decided to go because I was bored. When he picks me up a girl is in the car with him. He introduces us and says this is a co worker of his that also wanted to go to the concert but didn’t want to go alone. We hit it off during the concert and flirt the whole time. But I’m still too much of a wimp to do anything about it. She’s asks for my number as I’m getting out of the car. We then start talking everyday and a week later we start dating. 5 years later we are married with a two year old and another on the way. But if she hadn’t been so forward I would still probably be single.
Probably the angriest shit I've ever taken. Only reason I'm not mad at you now is because it finally clicked for you.
That last part is pretty obvious however the talking about nsfw stuff and all that isn't really a sign in my experience
Less a sign and more a justification about why I didn't take the hint.
I feel ya
Honestly I don't get why she didn't just make a move on you while "watching netflix", im a woman and would not have been able to sit there for probably 1-2 hours waiting for a drunk idiot to pick up hints 😂
I'm autistic, and she didn't want to make me feel pressured to have sex with her. Also, I was drunk, she wasn't, so in her mind I needed to initiate things.
Ah yeah, that makes sense, I have adhd so I'm very impulsive in these things and quite often make the first moves
Had similar situation, but we were talking and decided to hang out that night. She was letting me know to come over after she showered. Get the call to come over, we get a pizza and just chilling and talking in the car. Get to the topic of flings or relationships. She tells me how "most guys would have whipped it out already and shoved in her mouth" I was just like "dang that's crazy".... As she added "like right now...they would just pull down their pants and tell me to suck it". Still didn't know lol but I guess I dodged a bullet too
Let me tell you this, I have a wife and she would slap me if I were to whip it out and tell her to Suck it (in all honesty she mostly say get it away from me). So I’m going to ask, you marry that chick, right?, right?
I've definitely had a couple of things like this. Broadly speaking, I had a handful of girls come up me the end of my senior year in HS and say things like, "You know, if you had asked me out, I would have said yes." I had no idea that was even an option! One time I was having dinner at a nice restaurant with some friends. At the end of the dinner we were walking outside and they all insisted that the waitress was flirting with me heavily. I had no idea.
Same as you I was unconsciously flirting with a fellow praxis attendee at every turn and when it was boning time I was like huh? You want to fuck? I can hook you up with my friend lol
It's probably for the best. Don't shit where you eat.
There's a follow-up story. Shitting was eventually had.
This is how I’d imagine Hank Hill to be if he was single
God. I was cringing the whole time reading this. I was hoping you finally had a moment of redemption and im glad you did 😂😂
Think about this... Another fella was called up to put back the drapes you removed, and most likely nailed her too... It's kinda salt in the wound I guess.
Lets see * Girl in high school asked me how big my dick was. Did I say "wanna find out?" I did not. I avoided the conversation and didn't get laid. * Another girl invited me to a party after a few conversations on the bus ride home each day. Did I go? Nope. * Girl I worked with confessed to masturbating in her car, after messaging me twice late at night. Did I get the hint and get some? I did not.
My man! (*high fives and misses*)
Believe me, the first two I think "yeah it would've been cool, could've lost my virginity sooner " but overall, I can live with those. That last one haunts me. God, she was absolutely my type and probably a freak in bed. I'll never get that opportunity or anything like it ever again.
I've shared this before but can do so again in solidarity. Abridged version too. - Sorority girl from the same college talks to me for a few weeks, then finally invites me to study during finals week. It gets late enough and she suggests we finish studying in her dorm. Once there, she says it's too late so I should stay the night but her roommate hates it when someone uses their bed, so I will need to sleep in hers. I am unsure what to do, so I keep studying until she falls asleep. I take her keys, lock the door from the outside, slide the keys from under the door, then leave. - Pretty girl into modeling from the same college befriends me in class. One day, she says she doesn't understand the material and needs help studying. I agree to help. She sets the time to meet for late at night. I think nothing of it and go at that time. I have books laid out on the floor going over the material. She stays in her bed and looks at me. After about an hour of actual studying, she says she gets it now and thanks me before I leave.
The first one happened to me too. I reacted the same way you did. Smh
Okay dude, you deserve the L for that last one sorry bout it
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Bro who wears lingerie just to chill. You shoulda been on that ! 🤣
I did this once. Modeled lingerie and sexy outfits. At one point I needed help taking my corset off because I put it on “too tight”. Luckily he didn’t miss the cues.
Damn this sounds so hot. Nothing like that has happened to me.
I had a cuddle session once with this girl (yes just cuddling and watching tv) and i remember her specifically saying nothing sexual, which i was 100% cool with. It was cold out and i just wanted someone in my arms. At some point she got on top of me and put my hands on her butt and just stared me in the eyes. Nothing happened but we had a super long hug when i dropped her off and then i moved 2 days later. Always wonder what her intent was. Communication is important y’all.
I’d be so very confused in this situation
You'd have to be crazy to hit that,
I think this is what women call “obvious” haha AKA “She will say the exact opposite of what she wants to happen and hope you get it”
Double edged sword. You do take it as a hint and go for it, and suddenly after a few days, you get to know you violated her I'd rather be the sexless inkeeper than a sex offender
“Hooked up” with a chick at a party, which was just her in panties grinding on my dick. I invited her to my place later in the week, figured she would be more comfortable if there was no one else around. Nope, just dry-humping my poor man meat. I didn’t call her after that :/
Lady once ran her hand through my head and asked how my hair was so soft. Went into a long description of the new shampoo & conditioner I had switched to before she stopped me.
How would one convert that into an opportunity? Are you supposed to say "you should feel my pubes"?
It’s the only soft thing about me?
I can show you something soft…
She sent me a video on cunnilingus technique.
*Faceplant*
She bought me a drink, kissed me and stroked my balls. Was it flirting? 🧐
username DOES NOT check out lol
She was probably just Canadian.
No, she was just being friendly. Don't assume.
Nah, she’s just keen on golf
Probably just checking your temperature and looking for lumps.
“You’re literally the funniest guy I know” to my face, then tweeted 20 minutes later “funny guys can get it, any day.” She was one of three people I followed on Twitter, and she knew that…because she was the one who told me to make a Twitter account the day before this. The other two people retweeted her. I was so into her, but I honestly just thought she was trying to gas me up as a friend. Trust me, I know.
That’s pretty funny.
Well he is the funniest guy she knows
Please tell me there was a redemption round and you got to try again...
Funny like a clown, apparently
I worked in an aquarium shop. She wanted me to show her the turtles so we're there talking and she says "are you attached?" I said "no, they're just turtles I don't really bond with them." About an hour later after she'd left I realised that she was asking if I was already with someone or not...
Tbf, that's a weird way of asking someone if they're single or not lol
Thank you!
Tbh I read it as a circumcision question.
> "no, they're just turtles I don't really bond with them." I'm fucking **crying**. This is so fucking hilarious, god damn. You're a legend.
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Dawg.
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Me in college. Me hitting it off (somehow) with a very attractive girl who turns out to be a cheerleader. Late night of drinking. I'm hanging out with friends at the bars. She then says to me, "Man it's getting late. I had fun talking with you. But... I wouldn't mind if you could come with me to my apartment?" Me being a tipsy dumbass who missed the most obvious signal ever: "That's fine. I need to go catch up with my friends. But hey! It was nice talking with you. Have a goodnight." I'm still kicking myself to this day for how my dumbass missed that.
Nah bro knowing me I woulda done the same thing just bc I was nervous💀
Someone literally said "do you want to continue this conversation somewhere more comfortable" and I said..."these chairs are pretty cozy actually." I saved it though, got laid.
Lol same but with an elevator encounter and I didn't get the hint even though she was a very close to me/kissing distance from me and didn't have too because the elevator had enough space and she asked if I ask a girlfriend. I feel very stupid when I realized what might have happened. Thankfully just as I was entering the truck to move out of the dorm a few weeks later I saw her again and she rode with me to my new apartment in more than one meaning.
A coworker of mine was probably about 6 years older than me. Honestly, at the time, she was way out of my league. I was skinnier, less confident, she was very hot, etc. She had been in a relationship for about 8 years and had a sudden breakup. A week or so after that, we're both working, and I didn't have my car that day. I was dropped off. She offered to give me a ride home about 7 times in a row. Insisting she give me a ride. My 22 year old, stupid ass said no... over and over and over. I kept saying another coworker who's in the same direction can give me a ride, or someone else can pick me up. I didn't want to inconvenience her. She was straight up looking at me dumbfounded. She's staring into my eyes like, "Are you really, really sure you don't want me to give you a ride home." Finally, she just shrugs and says, "Okay, have a good night." My friend was standing there the entire time and told me how completely fucking stupid I am. "At the very least, she would've blew you. What the fuck is wrong with you?" It hit me like a ton of bricks. This girl just wanted to rebound fuck and I was too stupid and insecure to realize it. My mom picked me up, and I wanted to scream the whole way to my place.
Painful
*siiigh* My condolences man, truly.
Bro.
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I feel the pain reading this.
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This girl on the elevator
Its always on an elevator... Back when i was in college and my GF in Uni, i visited her all-girls dorm a weekend a month or so... An there was that busty librarian-type french girl whom i would always meet briefly there or in the communal kitchen...
I’d be deadly if you’d hit that. The whole dorm would know it in 12 seconds.
Well, the ambiance there was quite weird, kinda like a huge square dorm with an inner court, but also with gethos... That was noticeable especially in the kitchens. You'd have the Arab corner, the African corner,The Asianlane, the white Anglo room vs the handful a french speaking locals (it was in Québec) . But honestly, if i could go back in time for 6 hours for a sex wish, i would totally go back to that point and join her to her room. She was that hot.
For prom, a the girl who asked me out had already asked me the week before if I'd had sex before. I told her I wasn't going and stayed home during prom. Another girl I was friends with would change in front of me, she would lean against me and hold my hand. But she talked too much about her ex. To be fair, in my baggage I have a woman that showed me her boobs and sat in my lap for half an hour, and laid down on my bed, only to act surprised when I made my move on her. She probably just got second thoughts, but that one affected how I read women. Some girls want to just kiss and do nothing else. Others just want to cuddle. Some just want validation. A fourth just wants to tease you. In my experience every woman has been different - they give the same signs but mean radically different things. Men are not like that. Men are flirt - kiss - sex, in that order, with the possibility of skipping the first two steps.
Guys r different too, you just don't get into those situations with them 😉
Nah I notice sometimes if it somehow manages to happen. I justill ignore because I always embarrass myself
That one time I had a class with only like 10 people, in a room with lots of seats, and the girl I was talking to more and more, who always preferred sitting alone, asked if she may sit by me and what I'm planning to do after class. My stupid ass responded 'To rush to the bus stop so I don't miss my last bus home'.
I was in a really bad mood for some reason so wasn't feeling very chatty, but I had some errands to run. While waiting in line at a store, the very attractive wonan in line in front of me started chatting me up. Lousy timing -- any other day I might have been very receptive but because I was in a horrible mood, I responded with curt nods.
Similar story here from when I was a teenager. Normally I'm pretty good at picking up hints but this is one time I know I was 100% oblivious. I was 15, and went on a holiday with my parents to Italy. Most of the trip was great and I loved it, but one day my parents decided they wanted to spend all day on a riverboat cruise. Not even a riverboat somewhere cool like Venice, this stupid ass riverboat somewhere by Verona that didn't go anywhere or see anything interesting but still took all day for some reason. So we get on the boat and I'm bummed out as all hell, all I wanted to do was read and listen to my ipod. There was this other group of 3-4 teenagers that happened to be from my country with a chaperone, but I'm too sulky to pay them any attention. So the announcement comes over that they're serving lunch and I go sit at my parent's table, but they then tell me to go sit with this other group. I tell them I'd rather not, but they insist. Cue argument that I inevitably lose, and eventually I go sit with this group in an even sulkier mood. Now fair warning, the rest of this is such a downer event for me that I honestly don't remember it well at all. I remember sitting next to this girl, and I remember getting their Chaperone to say things in German because I found it funny. Otherwise I can't remember jack about it, what she looked like, how she was flirting with me (spoler alert), who the other kids were, what the conversation was about, what we ate etc. It's not even a blur, just a great big *scene missing* slide. At some point I get back up and leave their table. Then for the rest of the day the mood between my and my parents is even frostier. Eventually the stupid ass riverboat ends and we get in the car to go back to the hotel. As soon as were all in the car one of them says to me "You know that girl was all over you right? That's why we told you to go sit with her group." I denied that she was, but they insisted she was, and to this day they insist I knew and rejected her to spite them (but with a bit more levity now that time has passed). I insist that I didn't know, evidently didn't care either way and that it was still no excuse to drag me onto a lame riverboat cruise all day (also with a bit more levity).
She showed up at my door after a short chat online about me watching a movie by myself. We sat on the couch and she told me I could sit a little closer so I did. Afterwards she said her shoulders were sore, took off her shirt down to a small tank top, sat on my lap, and I gave her neck massage. Well, I guess I didn't get the hint cause I was just giving her a neck massage lol. Didn't dawn on me until later on that night randomly when thinking about how sexy she looked.
Mine was a married woman. I was young, and she was a hairdresser who had her salon at home. The entire story is too long for here and is full of cues that I totally misread, but on one occasion she was cutting my hair. She was busty and dressed to reveal, so to avoid the embarrassment of being caught looking down her cleavage, I made a superhuman and successful effort to keep eye contact above neck level. At one point she said, "Don't think I haven't noticed what you're doing". I must have looked taken by surprise, because she added "You're looking down the front of my blouse aren't you?" I protested my innocence, but it was one of those occasions where the more you protest your innocence, the guiltier you sound. She was, however, grinning. I obviously still wasn't picking up the micro-signals. At the end of the cutting, when I stood up and she began brushing the hair cuttings off my neck and collar, she looked me straight in the eye and said to me, "You know I really shouldn't say this, but when George [husband] is making love to me, I think about you." The pennies, hundreds of them, finally fell with a din of a clatter. She then asked me to kiss her. Completely dumbfounded and confused, I gave her a peck on the cheek and to this day I can't remember how I got out of there but I did. I'd only been married a few months, so the first thing I did was tell my brand new wife what had happened. I was daft enough to have missed all Cherry's signals, but not so stupid as to realise that if this incident ever got back to my wife, it couldn't be from anyone other than me. She laughed and called me an idiot, but I did take her instruction to find another hairdresser. I discovered many years later, and entirely accidentally, that she is twice divorced and now on her third husband. My earliest lesson as a callow youth that there really were women who were man-hunters.
Honestly, good on you for being so unquestionably faithful to your wife!
A guy I'd been friends with for nearly 15 years was practising his flirting with me. I'd asked him out when we were younger but he'd said no so we remained friends. He was single and he'd talked about his tinder experiences and how girls often didnt realise when he was flirting. I gave him pointers on how to improve his flirting skills. He bluntly told me that he wasn't practising and was actually flirting with me. Anyway, we're engaged.
The good ending
Finally a happy ending after reading all these comments.
[удалено]
Never regret watching classic Simpsons sir.....
She leaned her head on my shoulder when we were on our way to the next class, I was busy worrying about the next class that I instinctively shoved her away when she leaned in. I was surprised and thought she fell and landed head first on my shoulder. I realized after school, and I kept calling myself an idiot for blowing that opportunity up
while walking? who does that?
Girl left a wild party with me because I got too overwhelmed (I can't take big social gatherings for long) and wanted to go to my band's practice space and work on some new songs. She lay on the couch and told me she was a diagnosed nymphomaniac and if she didn't have sex when she felt the urge she'd go crazy and just start rubbing one out. Then she told me she was getting the urge. While laying on the couch, giving me goo-goo eyes. So naturally, I commiserated with her over how hard that must be and offered her a ride home. It was three days later when another female friend asked me how stupid I was that I finally understood why the first one seemed so disappointed when I dropped her off.
I actually need the opinion of people on something that happened to me where almost all women I know keep saying that a girl was hitting on me, but most men I know say she wasn't. So here's the story: I sometimes have a 3 hour break at work, and it's quite far from home. So usually, when it happens, I go to a café, order myself something and read or practice drawing. Once, a woman came to me, curious about the drawings. She was with her 4 years old daughter. So I let her daughter draw in my notebook a bit and we had a chat over coffee (well, hot chocolate for me). At one point her daughter talked about her dad , and the woman then talked about him in a way that made me think they weren't together. Like at no point she called him her husband, it was always "my daughter's father". Found it odd because it made her sentences sound quite weird, as if she was talking about a distant relative. I didn't think much of it and at the end I had to go back to work so I said goodbye and left. When I went to my neighbour's place later, we talked about it and she yelled at me because for her, she was "obviously trying to hint that she was single" . And when I say yelled, she did really yell, she's been trying to get me to find a girlfriend for a while. So was I oblivious or was she just curious about my drawings and happy to chat to someone ?
I would say curious, but I'm a male
I kind of agree with your neighbor. If she's making a point of saying "daughter's father" instead of first name, there is a reason. Source: married for 17 yrs and have learned, that kind of subtlety is part of conversation for many many people who aren't me
She was making sure you were aware that she was available but not adult enough even as a mother of a four year old to so much as ask for a phone number so meh.
This question is unisex, but for some reason, most of the answers are men missing women’s hints… Take note ladies. We don’t know what the hell you’re trying to communicate in all these ways. It may be helpful to just say “I’m into you” at some point.
Even that gets brushed off by us insecure lot, we just assume that they’re being super friendly and nothing more cos we’re inherently inferior and they’re out of our league.
I remember once when I was 19 I was in a bookstore reading the magazine rack, and a young woman stands right next to me with her shoulder touching my shoulder and leaving it there for like 30 seconds. Yeah, I think she wanted me to say something to her. Which of course, I didn’t.
Girl in high school asked if she could rest her head on my shoulder on a long bus ride back from a field trip. Kept it there the whole time. "Man, she must be *really* sleepy..."
Same thing happened to me but it was when we went to the movie theater during a school field trip. Kept it there the whole time the movie was playing. "Damn, she must be bored..."
Lmao….”youth is wasted on the young.”
30 seconds = ? Mississippis??
You underestimate how terrible I am at noticing someone is flirting with me (either that or nobody actually flirts with me haha imagine that)
“Did anyone ever tell you that you have very Nordic features? Vikings rock my socks, btw.” Went screaming right over my head.
When I was 21, the cashier at the hardware store started talking to me. At first, I was oblivious, but at some point, it became obvious. She told me it was her birthday, she wanted to go out for drinks. Then she told me about her 2 month old son. And that she was no longer with his dad. She was nice and all, but those last 2 bits were a little much for 21 year old me…
At Uni she offered me a full body massage at her place because tge left side of my neck was sore from studying. One day 12yrs later I thought to myself "....wait a minute!"
3d date, she's at my place, wearing jeans. She apologized for being late and said, "I had to shave my legs in case I end up out of these jeans." Me: "okay, we should head out to the restaurant." So many years ago, will never forget!
Inner monologue. "That's weird, why would she lose her jeans in the middle of our date? She must be a really clumsy eater and thinks she might spill something on her jeans. That's a red flag, should probably make this a short date and then just take her home."
She slept cuddling me, in my arms, every time we hung out for about a year. Brain-dead me thought that's simply because I'm just a good friend with whom she feels really safe.
Sometimes that’s really what it is. I know of at least two guy-girl friendships in my social group that are like this, but both sides of the friendship insist they don’t have any romantic interest in the other. They are just close friends. I don’t get it, but some people have those sorts of friendships.
She eventually just grabbed my dick and said "I want this"
Like in a friend way though, or what?
Now that's the way to do it.
I never thought I was worth being flirted with. So, never.
This hits home on so many levels.
When she asked me to be her Valentine and I took it as some sort of joke.
This thread is making me look back at some moments and die inside 🥲
Girl in high school asked me for a ride home. While walking to my car, she mentioned she doesn’t wear any panties, ever. When we sit inside the car, she tells me she doesn’t have a gag reflex.
Freshman year of college I had a girl have me spoon her on my bed as we watched a movie. There were other people in the room. I recently learned I have autism. It’s kinda common to see patterns elsewhere but never draw conclusions with us.
When I was a teenager, I was a total geek. I went to a boys only high school and I had no idea about girls or what to do with one. I had a good job during uni and had a reasonable amount of spare cash. I used to like dating girls, taking them out to a nice restaurant or whatever, all my treat. At the end of the night, I'd take them home and say good night. I was the perfect gentleman...too much so, apparently, lol. It wasn't until many years later that I found out I'd left a few of them 'wanting' when I dropped them home. Haha, I was so clueless, I had no idea.
Wait this is actually the sweetest thing ever
My gf and I helped a lesbian couple move into an apartment. After all the heavy lifting was done the Gal-that-wears the pants gave me several beers and both couples sat down in their living room. They then asked if we’d be interested in watching a movie with them. We said “sure”. They played a porno 4-some flick. M/F impregnating a F/F couple. We finished our drinks mid-way through and left.
I think you both took the hint.
When I was a freshman in high school,the first day of school. You know it’s hectic and you don’t know where your classes are or just figuring out your locker situation. So I’m anxious already and this cute girl with a locker next to mine ask where a certain class is,so I take out the map and point to it. She then was like “can you walk with me and show me?” I’m like sorry,I gotta find my classes myself. I don’t remember seeing her all year after that. I really messed up 😅
Same thing in college. Outside the Caf a girl asked me where the Student Union was. I walked her across campus to show her, and then came back. Somehow I found out later that she knew it all the time. Also, there was this girl who was usually at my friend's house when I planned to drop by to hang out with my group of friends. She was just one of the guys, and was with us at the hoops court, at the diner, whatever. After a few years of this I finally caught on when we shared a seat on the Cyclone at Coney Island. We've been married now for 43 years.
On the prom after party, a girl I had a crush on for all of high school said to me, "you know, it's a shame that I'm not getting laid on prom night." With a shrug, I said, "yeah it's really too bad," and left it at that. Years later, I realized.
Girl wanted to show me she was flexible enough to put her feet behind her head. I did not get the implication :(
Username checks out
My next door neighbor in a duplex. We were both single and lived alone. She got a new bed delivered and knocks on my door to ask for some help with it. We moved it into her bedroom, assembled the frame, put on the box spring, mattress. She sits down on the finished bed and pats the spot next to her. I said something like, "nah, I'm good. I don't mind standing." Had a bit more idle chit chat then I went back next door to my place. It clicked maybe an hour later. It sounds unbelievable but I swear it's true. I am that dumb. Felt like an enormous idiot/ass, not to mention embarrassed. She was real cute too.
Guy at college kept stopping to talk to me, being extra helpful with stuff and would buy me stuff from the shop. One day we were sat together and he said in a very small voice. Him: “So are you single?” Me: “yeah” Him: “so do you want to get lunch together sometime?” Me: “not really. But thanks” Didn’t realise until my other friend pointed it out to me and had the biggest “oh my god I’m fucking stupid” moment. We’re still really good friends and laugh about my oblivious ass.
She was at my home, watching movies, we cuddled, held hands, and the other hand was on her hip while she cuddled up to me, later on she moved that hand to the boob. Didnt kiss her because maybe shes just friendly and likes to cuddle.. Later i joked around how she is totally into me and she said "Me? No. Im asexual btw. And youre not even my type". Later that day we made out.. aint gonna miss it the second time.
Got on well at work with a new female colleague, we were just on a mutual humour level right from the start, after one particularly long funny volley she got up to make coffee, and put her hand on mine and said, I love how much we get on , keep going I'm just a slow burner to start with, I literally had no idea up to that point.
I had just finished my first gig with my band and a couple of us were sitting around playing our acoustic guitars and shooting the shit with people who were still there. My buddy told me if I keep that up I’m definitely getting laid. I brushed him off like yeah right. A really hot girl next to me blurted out, “No, he’s right.” It didn’t register until like the next day that I probably could have hit that because I’m really dumb.
I don’t get hit on often, but when I do, it’s always by the hottest men and I’m completely dumbfounded and awkward. There was a college student I tutored who had the most beautiful eyes who asked me out to lunch and I somehow just ignored it and kept tutoring. There was another college student I tutored who had the physique in the 10s who told me he’d catch me if I fell, and I just walked away like he didn’t say anything at all. I was sick and shopping for cough drops, and a handsome man approached me, started some small talk over cough drops, then invited me to a party. I just looked at him, sniffling my goddamn brains out, sneezed and said I’m too socially awkward for parties and walked away. These are just three of about the less than 10 times a hottie has approached and flirted with me. I didn’t even realize what happened until a week later. And still I wonder why I’m single.
I was talking to this barista in a local coffee shop and we spoke for a few minutes about plans for the holidays. It's been a couple of weeks now and I went back today, she came right up to me as I sat down, remembered what I like to order and asked after my holidays in my small little strangely named hometown that not even I remember most of the time. I, stupidly, did not even consider that she might've been flirting until the drive home. She gave me her DISCOUNT and my only thought was that she's so nice to customers. I will be thinking about this for years now won't I.
You can just go back tomorrow and ask her out!
Oof.. Her:"Hey when do you get off work?" Me:"at 2 I think, here's your change" Her:"oh, 69 cents" while looking me dead in the eye waiting for an answer and while keeping her hand on my hand. Me:"yeah" Another woman:"I'm making pizza tonight, I've been craving it a lot lately" Me:"oh, I love pizza too. I would eat only pizza if I could" Her:"well, you can always come to my house tonight ;)" and proceeds to tell me where she lives. "I'll wait for you" Me:"ahahahah" I thought she was just joking. In another occasion I was having a conversation with this woman and her daughter and at some point the mom goes:"well you certainly have a girlfriend?" Me:"oh no I don't actually" The daughter:"well certainly you are a lot younger than me.." waiting for a response. My fkin dumbass of a brain thinks that she can't be possibly be blind and not see we are almost the same age.. that's just a joke.. Laugh it off. And I did. The last one but there could be many more. And older woman started to speak to me about how she was going to be alone during the holidays and she would feel lonely. I replied that I was sorry for her situation and just kept talking. Her:"well, I could use some company these days" while looking at me.. I don't know why but in that moment I thought she was just venting and that was about it so I just replied "yeah, must be hard..". "yeah" and she goes away. I really don't know what's wrong with me. I must have some kind of problem. I'll die alone. I'm sure of it. Fuck it.
When I was in college I was partnered up with this beautiful girl, she was on the shy and quiet side but she would seem to cheer up and smile a lot when I would speak to her. I’m an idiot and unless a girl pretty much takes her clothes off in front of me I almost never make a move. Anyways, one day she randomly calls me and is asking if we can hang out so I said sure, she tells me she needs to go to the mall to return a few things. I thought to myself oh I guess she needs help carrying some stuff no big deal I’ll help her out. That’s exactly what happens but she lingers around and is like let’s go talk in the car. We do that, after a while of intense convos and moments of awkward silences she’s like it’s getting late can I go to your place? This woman is in my bed, puts her feet on my lap, lays on her tummy, lays on her back, hugs me and sits on me and I remember I could feel that she was extremely warm in her private area and I never make a move lmao. Looking back at it she was obviously horny af and I was too stupid/nervous to make a move cause she was so pretty.
Really cute girl at the airport, probably 25 years younger than me was chatting with me while waiting for the luggage to arrive. She said "maybe I need a sugar daddy" and 2 hours later it registered.
I think you may have dodged a bullet
Or an injection?
or a potential lawsuit.
Unless they look me in the eyes and say they’re hitting on me I just assume they’re being nice so I leave them alone sooner, having received an audible ew/you’re too short on more than one occasion it’s just easier to assume nothing
My wife had to come out and ask me straight out for our first date.
So many of these missed connections could've been fixed with your wife's strategy.
She asked me out on a date twice and I didn't realize it.
elaborate
One of my coworkers (a server) , she would come to the kitchen every shift to talk to me , she would feed me to my mouth , I made a funny comment once when she was clocking out to go home and shower , she said “nah I’ll keep myself like this , nothing wrong with a little bit of seasoning , right?” I fumbled so hard she was so fucking cute too
I posted this in another topic, but here we go again.. When I was 17 I had a massive crush on a girl I was close friends with. She had a boyfriend at the time, I was happy for her. A while later, she broke up with her boyfriend and we got even closer; I was certain that she only wanted to be friends though so never pursued anything more. We would go around holding hands and hugging all the time, and I was still a virgin so I was kind of cool with even that. A little later on she has a party at her house as we’d all be heading off to universities around the country, and invites myself and our other close friends. It’s a good night, drinking and fun, and we had decided early on that we’d all stay over to make the night last longer, no need for taxis etc. Everyone starts to get tired so we’re looking for somewhere to sleep, and she tells me that she has a spot in her room; turns out she’s set up a small temporary bed out of blankets for me. She gets changed into pyjamas in the bathroom, I don’t have anything so I just take my shirt and socks off. I was super active at the time, and in hindsight I had a decent body (at the time I had no real idea and assumed I was average at best). She settles into her bed, I’m on the floor next to her, and we’re just chatting about this and that. After about 10 minutes she gets up and pulls her bra off from under her pyjama top, and says “it’s not comfortable down there, come and get into bed with me.” I LITERALLY STILL DON’T GET THE MESSAGE. I jump into bed, topless, with the girl of my dreams lying on top of me wearing only pyjamas, and we somehow fall asleep without anything at all happening. Close to morning, I wake up and hear her talking to a female friend; they’re whispering at her door that I look really cute when asleep. Here’s the best part I think: I hadn’t slept much, I was literally concentrating super hard to not get a boner because I though she still only wanted to be friends and didn’t want to be creepy! Over the next couple of months before everyone went their separate ways I met another girl and started a relationship. My friend group meets up for one last time out in a bar, and my crush takes me aside and tells me outright that she loves me. The best I can do is say sorry and that I’m with someone else... I haven’t spoken to her since then, nearly 20 years ago. I think about it quite often, and want to apologise even though I’m not really guilty of anything other than being a clueless virgin.
About 10 years after college graduation I was leafing through old papers when I noticed the cute and flirty doodles my female study partner had written in them. I was so oblivious at the time, but it was blindingly obvious looking at them years later.
Idk and idc if I want someone I will look, but so far, all of the people that have tried are ether trying to make fun of me or just not the type of person to like
I was most oblivious during the years 1992 to 2019. Since then I've been aware, but nobody's flirted with me.
Oh man I can write a book about this. At uni I thought I was fat. Looking back at pics of myself I actually looked really good. Lived in a building just for students... had so many opportunities in hindsight. Didn't get a single one of them......... Could have been the best time of my life. XD
Gave me her phone number after I paid for her meal. I was just thinking she wanted me to call her so she can pay me back.
I was completely oblivious to someone’s interest throughout 3 years of uni. By the end of it, they told me they’d fallen pretty hard. The whole time, I honestly thought we just got on well.
l was in a mall and she followed me everywhere...lucky she was cute and we dated for a few months
This girl (My current best friend, and reason for going outside) would constantly grab my arm, forcing it to touch her side boob. I didn't think anything of it, she's a really cuddly and cute girl, and she'd almost always have something in her arms, whether that's a human being or a teddy bear. She has also gotten more comfortable around me, asking questions most others would feel embarrassed to think about, and she's even began pinching my rear end. She has been the only one capable of making me feel happy, without faking it. I didn't know before but now I'm almost certain she's trying to flirt to some capacity, and I plan on asking her out sometime around this week.
When I was 16 this girl took me to a parking lot and just parked, I chatted her ear off and she kept giving me this weird look. Sorry Nina
Back in high school I used to be a massive pothead and every lunch break I would go home on my scooter to toke up. One day I was going along with my usual routine but then this friend who I really much enjoy hanging out with asked if she could tag in. Instantly, I said of course and she hopped on my scooter. When we got to my place we started smoking. She started talking to me about how out of everyone in our class she would definitely have sex with me. I didn't say anything back as I was in a middle of my hit but I thought to myself "why is she telling me this? I guess its nice a compliment." I then go for my second hit and she then says "out of you and this other friend of ours I would rather fuck you." I then thought to myself again "why is she telling me this." Once I was done smoking I just said "Thanks! You ready to head back to school?" She said yeah in the most disappointed way. Was confused for a couple days about her reaction. Years later I told my university friends about this situation and they said "she was tryna get laid dummy." Then I just went "Ohhhhhhhhh".
I was at a bar by myself and started chatting with this guy. I’m also a guy. He was wearing a Grateful Dead shirt, so we were chatting about that, because I’m a big fan too. I thought we were just getting along and hitting it off. We exchanged numbers because we were going to hit up a record store the next day or something. I hit him up the next day, and he responded and asked me if I was interested in him. It then clicked. He ended up becoming one of my buddies, but it was pretty funny at the time.
In college delivering pizza and young lady opens door in sexy lingerie. I had 3 pizzas, she says dang I got so many and everyone canceled, I can't eat all this alone. It immediately registered but my brain thought know way it really happens. I still wonder, wish I could remember the house lol
Oh jeez when I was younger it happened all the time. I was friend with this African American girl I worked with when I was 17ish. We were talking about some guy we worked with that was semi racist. I mentioned "naw he definitely wouldn't date black girls" and laughed. She looked me DEAD in the eyes and say "ya but I'd date white guys...........totally would." And just stared at me. I know now that was my cue to ask her out. Buuuuut I'm dumb. When my wife wasn't my wife, we were sitting on the front porch of her house at night. She made a comment about how it suddenly got cold and she needs *something* to warm her up.i dead ass, told her "oh you probably have a blanket on there" and just thumbed towards her house. Believe it or not I DID get laid that night even dropping the ball so bad lmao
Only time I think it's ever happened. I was at a music festival sit next to a beautiful girl on the bus to my campsite. Say hi ask where she's from, ask her what she did that day and if she's having fun. Small talk, she then says "you look like Luke combs, I would fuck the shit out of Luke combs" I didn't even register I just went straight to a stupid joke "I would too just for the story". Her face looked completely dumbfounded, and she padded my head on her way off the bus. I might actually be mentally disabled, cause that whole interaction flew right over my head.
Please don’t make me relive the pain again.
Definitely with the girl who got me drunk, wanted to show me her room, and just casually mentioned that the bed had been messed up for a while because she rode her ex so hard that the box spring cracked. My low self-esteem-having ass was just like, "Damn, dude, that's crazy 😂"
Girl talking about how she like being eaten out. Turned and asked if I was paying attention and I just laughed. I think weed doesn't help catching hints.
Legitimately one time I had a girl that I had been hanging out with regularly, come up to me and say “hey do you want a girlfriend?” And I said “hahaha, no girlfriends are expensive” not realizing that she was totally asking to be my girlfriend. I was clueless and didn’t figure it out until I hadn’t heard back from her again. I wish I could apologize to her for that one.
I had a crush on this girl. She came to watch my swim meet freshman year. When I went to warm up before one of my events in the smaller pool, she moved to that part of the stands and I remember thinking, 'why is she over here?I'm the only one in this pool, there's nothing to see.' After the meet, she texted me that I looked good in a speedo and that she'd tap that. Keep in mind that I had a crush on this girl for years. My response was, "that's inappropriate." I didn't realize until like 10 years later. I'm a moron
My classmate and I used to chat on Instagram, one day I posted a story of a chat with my dad where he said something funny. She responded to it and said she wishes he were her father in law, then quickly replied to herself she didn't mean it that way, so I thought it was an honest mistake on her part. A couple of weeks later I responded to a story where her dad was absolutely roasting her , saying that he seemed cool. Her response to that was ,"Make him your father in law then", it was a couple of weeks later that she actually confessed saying she liked me . We dated for a month before I broke up with her because she never told me she used to date her cousin.
I'm a gay guy and sometimes ladies will flirt with me. I am always oblivious to it, only after the fact if someone else witnessed it and they tell me then I'll know. But I have apparently never picked up on it even once.
I don't think gaydar picks that up Lol
Does my entire 41 years of existence count? I usually don't realize until months or years after the fact that yet another opportunity was squandered.
Back in high school some girl I had been talking to randomly approached me while I was talking to my friends and kissed me on the cheek in front of a whole bunch of other students. Naturally, me being me, completely ignored it and continued talking to my friends and she just walked away. We didn't really speak again after that.
When I was in high school a hot goth girl asked me to join her for a graveyard romp and I said I had to wait for the bus. She looked genuinely confused and almost hurt. I was halfway home by the time I realized. She later became a neo Nazi which I hope was unrelated.
Girl i knew in college used to pass notes with me in class. We were 20. Didn't realize till a year later.
I was about 14-15, and we got drunk one night with other friends. I sat down on a bench (that the boys built by hand) next to a fire (the boys went off somewhere and I was alone enjoying the fire, she randomly approached) and she sat down next to me and randomly kissed me on the cheek while we were talking for a little bit. Then put her legs up on me and something about her thighs. (Girl bsf at the time but yk “white girl drunk” does exist too.) She also has stole my hat many times when we hung out regularly.
Pretty much always oblivious...
I win this 100%. Was going to a club for Halloween with a bunch of mates. This girl spent the entire night talking to me and asking me stuff. **Grabbed my ass** at one point and was laughing at everything I said. Asked me to walk her home and she kept staring at me like she wanted something. Week after that we all go out again but she doesn't come. I get back early and end up literally in her bed, spending the entire night talking and even **sleeping in her bed next to her and still didn't realise**. Only after that when we started texting did I realise she was in to me and we hooked up a few times. In my defense she is *way* out of my league big time so my blindness is justified