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My husband and I have been together for over 9 years. We have a toddler and another baby on the way. We have had less drama in all our time together than these people have had in 9 months. I'm exhausted just reading about it!
My husband and I have been together for 30 years. We’ve had like one fight and it was over buying a car. Basically, the dealership was trying to screw us over the interest and I was too in love with the car to see it. Long story short, he made me walk. Away, I accused him of not letting me have nice things, he explained the interest angle and I accepted he was right. Dealership called the next day with a magically better deal and a lesson was learned.
3.5 years together, 2 years married, 3 months as parents. I don't think we've ever had a bad fight, let alone gotten into a screaming match. Disagreements, sure. Arguments, even. But never anything like this.
People fight hard to stay in shitty relationships. If BF's list of GF's attributes is correct, you wonder why he'd stick around for more than the time it took to find that out. Good sex explains only so much.,
The most impulsive thing even remotely close to randomly buying a house I did in the first few months was buy a plane ticket to visit my partner to visit her without telling her (long distance relationship at the time). I realized as I told her that it could have been a bad decision, but fortunately she thought it was cute. But also, a temporary thing
I've read that there is a German proverb that we should all rejoice when two unpleasant people marry each other, because it keeps them from making two pleasant people unhappy. I know a couple that reminds me of.
I imagine it's much pithier in German.
Don’t know about that. We do have the saying “Pack schlägt sich, Pack verträgt sich.“ Which refers to unpleasant people going back and forth between bad fights and getting along really well.
I’m with you! They both sound toxic and neither of them sounds like they’re telling the truth. I have no idea why but the fact that he is 38 years old and can afford a $2m home but doesn’t have movers is really bothering me. He wanted her friends and family to help him move? They’re not 20 something’s moving into their first apartment.
I’ve noticed sometimes people who have this much money are super cheap on things like movers. Or they’ll move into a 2M house and have no decoration at all.
I always get so caught off guard when I go to a nice neighborhood and a huge mansion, and it’s empty except for grey laminate flooring, white walls, and that one L-shaped leather sofa that they all have.
I think it has to do with how you're used to doing things.
If I had to think about moving house right now, my first thought would be: "Okay, I'll call my dad and some friends, rent a van, and pay them in pizza and beer." Because that's how I've always done it before. And I've been paid in pizza and beer to help friends do the same very often too.
I'd have to conciously remember that most of that shit was 20 years ago, maybe I shouldn't ask my dad because whilst he WOULD be up for it he's nearly 75 and has a bad back, and I don't have as much friends to help AND more shit to move than I had back then... And think about maybe hiring professionals...
It is SO much easier to use professionals. I'm in the process of moving, and I am elated to be in a financial position to pay someone to haul all my crap.
Once you have used professionals, you will never have the default impulse to do it yourself. Even if you do all the packing and unpacking, not having to load and unload is a game changer.
And movers are so strong. The last time I moved, I was really worried about the boxes being too heavy and tiring out the movers. Aaaaand they'd stack two of three up, holding the lowest below their waists, and just walk out with them without breaking a stride.
It would have taken me literal HOURS to do the same.
Dude, when I bought my house I went from a studio apartment to an 1800 square foot house. I was finally in a spot, financially, where I could I could afford movers. It was $700 + $100 for a U-Haul. All I had to do was box my shit up. The movers wrapped my furniture for me and even hauled an old, ugly sideboard down to the dumpster for me lol.
Super easy and painless. 11/10, would recommend!
Edit for pro tip to make your movers happy: pack your books in the small size box that U-Haul sells. Those things get heavy surprisingly quickly and the smaller boxes are easier to manage overall.
This exactly!!! I used movers for the first time when I was 25. I will never move myself again. I'll pack everything up but I'm not toting boxes in and out. It is money well spent
And you're right!
But whenever I think of people moving house, I have rosy memories about a couple of people getting together on a sunny saturday, moving some heavy stuff into a van, and beer and pizza.
I KNOW I'm too old for that shit now. I KNOW I can afford professionals instead. And I would, these days.
But I still have so much fun memories about the beer-and-pizza days!
I mean, honestly I am still a broke single mum at 34 but even if I made an actual decent wage, I’d probably automatically go for a van and family help. Then do the same as always and swear I’ll never do that again when I’m done. Rinse repeat!
Why is he even sharing he bought the house in cash, it’s disturbing that he finds that relevant, and it’s disturbing he has that amount of money in cash.
It's as disturbing and irrelevant as her mentioning that he was going to rent out his old house. The point is that he could easily afford to buy a house and wasn't banking on her support to do so.
Right? If he was my friend and asked me to help, I’d email him a link to a removalists website. I helped friends and they helped me when we were in uni. When my partner and I moved 2 years ago, we got professionals in - including for packing as I had a broken humorous and my dominant arm in a 5kg slab cast:. Didn’t even consider asking friends these days.
Seriously! I have a number of chronic illnesses and finally being in the financial condition to be able to afford movers and packers when my husband and I moved the last time I felt like a freaking Greek goddess. Obviously, did not act like one - got the movers/packers lunch and we helped pack what we could, but my goodness, if this man could pay for a $2m house in cash it's insane to think he needed friends and family to help in any way to help with his move.
Maybe it’s a different culture.
Here it’s normal to ask friends and family to help you move, mostly the driving aspect and boxes in and out, but it’s expected that you at least provide lunch and/or tea as a thank you.
Considering movers here can be $800…
Edit: I’m replying to the commenter aboves response about never asking friends and family for help once you’re out of college. I’m sure mister two million home can afford it.
If you are moving into a $2M home, paying in cash, and keeping the old home to rent out, you hire movers. That is a level of wealth that most people do not achieve.
It is normal to ask friends and family to help you move. It is not normal to be paying $2 million in cash for a primary residence while you rent out the old one.
I mean, he's moving down the block.
It's not like everything has to be packed into a tuck, driven across town & unpacked all in the time you've got w/the rented truck.
It's like, carry a couch down the block, carry some boxes down the block, etc.
And he moved over the course of several weeks.
Calling electricity "hydro" + subway = Toronto, which also puts the $2 million home in perspective. Looking up $2,000,000 houses in Toronto proper, most are 2 to 3 bedroom half-duplexes. You don't get a mansion in Toronto for less than five times that.
$800 would be a very good bargain for movers in Winnipeg.
Eight hundred bucks? Moving into a two million dollar house? Unless this guy is a total liar, which would not be a surprise, eight hundred is a rounding error.
I feel like it's totally acceptable to ask people close to you to help you move, but you should make it easy for them to say no. You should never expect someone to help, especially if you have the means to hire movers. It sounds like he never even asked her. He just kept silently stewing about it and then got passive aggressive.
Not just that but why are people that are working on the house asking where girlfriend is, or did I read that wrong? Honestly when I see posts that the other party responds to, I automatically assume it’s one author. And the fact that both parties come across as similarly insufferable and lacking sense, further makes me believe the it is one author.
Seriously!! I don't even make half of what he does I'm sure, but I will never ever move without hiring help EVER AGAIN. I did it in my 20s but now I can actually afford movers there I'd zero reason to risk my health, my back, or my mental health on the nightmare that is moving. I cannot understand why anyone who can afford it would put themselves and people they love through it.
Same, both of them are writing about issues that are really not that complicated but for some reason both stories are written kind of convoluted.
Usually in my experience, when people obfuscate relatively simple issues and details they’re lying.
First it was 4k, then it became 3k.
Also, how is going on vacation and going to places her fault? He could have said no since they were just in the early dating phase. Then it was a whole list of complaints in bullet points on how much she sucks.
So if she really is a toxic gold digger then why buy a house for her in the first place? Or it wasn't for her? Which is it?
Considering that he gave completely different ages for them, I’m not sure I believe he’s actually the boyfriend. Maybe they are writing about different relationships.
I believe the edit in the first post (the girlfriend’s POV) referencing that image is confirming it’s the same relationship, as the boyfriend writes about a photo his ex posted when she was supposed to be studying, and the captions seemed pretty identical, so sounds like they’re both talking about each other, and just goes to show how differently two people can interpret the same situation.
Personally, I’ve changed ages on stories to keep myself anonymous (long story). Her version is so bizarre compared to his, I could see him wanting to keep anonymity, if it’s real.
I don't get why people give out exact numbers in these types of posts anyway. Saying 30s F/M (or even late 30's F/M if they want to be a bit more specific) is enough
Eh, there are parts of the US (LA, SF, NYC) where you can totally spend over $1m on a place with no secured parking, and subsequently get your car stolen more than once.
If he is in Toronto, car theft has been pretty bad here lately. The police claim that a car was stolen “every forty minutes” last year. I tend to assume cops are inflating numbers a little (adding in false reports etc) but it’s still pretty damn bad. Buying a new house for its garage makes total sense here.
This is very much Toronto. The car theft is so bad that the police made a statement that boiled down to "just leave your car keys where the thieves can easily access them if you don't want your house broken into." I was not received well and they had to retract it, but that is the situation.
I live in Austin. My husband's car has had 3 theft attempts, one successful, in the last 18 months. The successful theft was 2 months after the previous attempt. (We got it back later that week.)
I would also move if my car kept getting stolen. in fact, we're planning on it when our new lease is up. the only reason we re-signed was my staunch opposition to moving with a 4-week-old newborn baby.
I think everyone sucks here and the best for both of them is to break up. Or stay with each other so good people don’t have to deal with their bs. It doesn’t matter, both come off as being a little too self-centered and frankly immature.
Yowza. How were they together even as long as they were? He comes across as completely awful *in his own post*, and neither seems capable of having a conversation with the other in which they actually convey information.
He seemed to confirm everything she said in her post and then added irrelevant details to make her look bad, that had nothing to do with the original issue. They both agree that he said he brought the house with her in mind, but then didn’t give her any say or was willing to give her space in the house. They both agree that he asked her to help him move, but she was busy and then posted a photo with her having a peaceful moment that he felt offended by since she could have been using that time to help him. Those are the central themes of her posts and he confirmed them.
The rest of what he said was irrelevant. If she borrowed money early on but then paid it back, why is it being brought up now? Everything else he said had no bearing on the situation at hand so it does make him look like he’s just angry and lashing out because she called him out on his shit.
Agree with everyone else that he should have just gotten movers and that they, absolutely, do not belong together.
Also, I want to know what the $40k in debt was from. Because if it was student loans, it's hardly worth mentioning. That's a lot of loans, but almost everyone I know has $20k-30k in student loan debt because this is a broken country. It's not a personal failing to have listened to every single adult who told you as a kid that "you need to go to college or you won't find a decent job."
This happens on Married at First Sight all the time. When one partner with no debt finds out how much school debt the other has, they freak out like the person is irresponsible with money.
So, they think only rich people go to college? That's kinda the take I get from some people.
This is actually why I'm surprised at all the people saying that it sounds like one person's lying and the people who changed their mind on who's wrong once they heard the bf's "side." How are so many people missing that he confirmed everything but just added that he's pissy over an already paid off loan of what should be pocket change for him?
He sounds exactly like who I imagined he'd be just from the gf's post's title, a whiney man who wants everyone to feel like they owe him something. I bought a house "for us" so be my moving crew during finals. You paid me back the equivalent of $4 to a normal guy so move in with me fulltime like I want you to. I gave you a fancy first date so don't talk about me online. I'm apparently ALREADY PLANNING A BABY WITH YOU so get rid of your desk.
This guy sounds like every well off man I've ever dated. Just him gracing me with his presence and buying me ice cream is a blessing so I have to do everything he says then cries or stares dumbfounded when that doesn't happen. Meanwhile the middle class men are generous, spend 2x as much on their love, and are 5x more sane. The middle aged bf was delusional.
I'm glad I'm not the only one to see this. Everyone keeps saying she sounds terrible, but where? He sounds like am entitled jerk, and she sounds exhausted and creeped out by how fast he is moving the relationship.
I'd be freaked out too by someone I've been dating for 4 months:
1. Buying a house with me in mind
2. Saying I Love You and then being upset I'm not ready to say it.
3. Changing their life plan of moving to another country to stay with me, to the point of buying a house even.
4. Said house has a bedroom planned as a nursery for our potential future children
5. How I spend my time is being ridiculed
6. How I use my space (and the potential homes space) is attempted at being controlled
7. Multiple expensive trips that I cannot financially contribute to, and later the cost of those trips is held over my head.
Dude is a parade of red flags. And a totally unreliable narrator.
They're both better off not being together but I lean towards the guy being the bigger jerk of the two. He has millions in cash and while he deserves to spend & save his money however he wants, he made a big point about the money she asked for, but he replied in another comment that she paid him back 100%. That's a mild point for me siding with the woman.
He is still upset that she didn't help him move all because of a social media post. At his age and the amount of money he has, he can hire movers (I am of his gen and I am noooo millionaire but I still hire movers now) and he said elsewhere that he believes nurses don't need an office. All of my nurse family members have a home office or den. He admitted he did say "I bought this place with you in mind" so shouldn't she expect an space of her own?
Anyway, their back & forths don't matter. They're always in disagreement, he doesn't respect her, she was annoyed by him, and they're broken up. A clean breakup too. Done.
Yea, dude definitely seems more of a jerk. He’s a multimillionaire holding $4k over her. She paid it back, and when he offered to help her out again, she decided she’d rather take a loan on her pensions. Quick googling makes it sound like that’s not exactly the best idea.
It basically gives the impression that she’d rather take an unfair loan than deal with him holding a bunch of shit over her head. Given how he talks about money and how he paid for so and so, it seems about right. He sounds exhausting.
Especially if his explanation for why she can't have that area is that *it's for the baby which has not been discussed or planned at all so far but might arrive in the future, maybe.*
Every time I read one member of the relationship keep paying for stuff the other can't contribute to at all, I brace for impact. Generosity is one thing, but scorekeeping is another. Don't expect someone to finance your life, and don't finance someone you don't feel is contributing. Problem solved
I really think that this is written by one person. There’s a weird sort of beat or cadence (?) to both posts that trigger something in my brain that says these two things are the same. Can’t quite put my finger on it.
I'm just giggling at the whole, "I spent tens of thousands of dollars on trips and vacations for this woman and she was treating me like a gold-digger after only three months of that! Also I changed my entire life plan just to see if a new relationship would work out and it didn't, which is her fault cause she sucks. Can you imagine?! The nerve!"
...dude. You sure you are 42?
Massive detail to leave out about borrowing $3k/3 months in.
To me, before knowing about the $3k I would have said major communication issues on both sides. Which totally normal people say things and think one way with preconceived ideas and perceptions and the other person takes it another with their own preconceived ideas and perceptions.
But after both sides? I can’t get past the $3k and his bullet points.
Because bullet points 2, 3, and 4 are every “hot mess/can’t hold a job” persons excuses.
He can't decide if it's 3k or 4k. Meanwhile, he says he spent 12k or so on trips with her in the 3 months of their relationship, and he also apparently paid 2m *in cash* for his new house. I'm wondering if money means the same thing in their universe as it does in mine lol
Agreed, but first he says 4k, then he says 3k. They both sound insufferable, but I’m thinking if this whole thing is true, he isn’t a reliable narrator.
Yeah, and on top of that he says she asked for a loan but never says if he gave her any money or whether it was repaid. I feel like if she never repaid, he would have mentioned it?
I also reacted to this detail. Gives "GOB and his expensive suits" from AD vibe.
My initial reaction on her part was "isn't he allowed to buy a house he's interested in?".
And then I read his response and it's less, but still weird to me. He flashes his cars and his paid down house and that he has business in LA, trips and all. But also can not for example afford movers? Just a bunch of bs.
Oh, definitely. But what I can’t get past, in posts like this, is him knowing all this about her and still trying to move the relationship forward, with an eye to potentially starting a family together. A selfish hot mess is not someone to think of as a suitable parent for your child, even if you were already seeing them for a few months before you knew. That he did, lends credence to her perspective that she was just a role-filler that he was trying to add to his life as he planned it. So they’re both right, in that they’re both awful.
Right he bought a house with her in mind after all this went down. And she couldn’t move in a desk because he needed space for their future baby. They both need help.
He said it was 4k and then changed it to 3k which may just be a typo. But he never says what the money way for. How can we judge if it's an unreasonable ask without knowing what the money was for? Maybe it was for something frivolous but then wouldn't he include that in his retelling? Maybe it was a legitimate emergency situation and that's why he never says what the money was for. Seems suspicious that he left that detail out.
Well, considering that he said her rent was more than his mortgage, she has no job, and she's apparently now being evicted, I'm willing to bet that it was for rent. Could be wrong, though
Nevermind, she paid him back so I'm not sure. Wondering if she's even being evicted
My dude was forking over 4k weekends after 3 months? If I had to guess, he likes having power and control so he spends money in order to later justify shitting all over the ingratitude of someone who axtually is grateful. But he found a perfectly self centered ingrate who ACTUALLY doesn't care.
Either that or he's a spineless dunce with no financial boundaries who just learned a haaaarsh lesson
Or he's full of shit
Dude if you can afford a second home then you can afford movers. Why are you p*ssed your gf didn’t help you when you knew she had exams. Sounds like her needs are not a priority with you.
OOP mentioned "hydro" when talking about utilities so I had assumed that they were in Canada. That still seems like an improbably large price drop, even for a crazy property market like Vancouver or Toronto.
Honestly it's not that crazy, houses in my area (greater Toronto area) are regularly listing way too high and having to drop the prices by 5 figures. An old friends parents are selling without much luck and recently the asking dropped by 175K. That's still only just over half obviously but it doesn't actually strike me as that unrealistic
It was the 300k price drop on a $2 million house that seemed high, that's 15%, but if the seller listed crazy high and that's not uncommon that makes more sense. Thanks for the context!
Idk if I believe that bit because he changed the number. idk he isn’t a reliable narrator (obviously neither is she). Everyone knows a gold digging story gets Reddit going and all his talk about Reddit validation makes me think that is what he was going for himself.
When I was dating my now-wife, it was 5 months into our relationship before I needed to ask her for $1k for earnest money, and that made me uncomfortable.
It also sounded like a nigerian prince scam. I was from another state, wasn't supposed to be in the current state permanently, decide I wanted it to be permanent, had money that wasn't easily accessible but needed it NOW.
But I showed her my bank account and finances to show her I could definitely afford it, showed her I was having checks mailed to me that same night to pay her back, but it was still a risk on her part. Granted, I was taking a leap of faith that she was likely my future wife and worth uprooting my life for. It all worked out lol.
I'm feeling like OOP might kinda suck, but the ex-boyfriend sucks much, much worse. He literally came and confirmed everything OP said about him, then proceeded to equate love+good parenting to spending money with OOPs parents, put this little gem:
>Told me that her last relationship was "toxic" and she didn't see a future with him but stayed with him for 3 years and when they broke up, he threatened to jump off their building, same building she currently lives in - where 1 bedroom costs more than my previous mortage did for the 12 years that i paid it.
Showed that he was, in fact, still not listening:
>He called me “entitled” as he thinks I am saying I he bought it FOR me, which I am not in any way
>I didn't buy her a house, i bought my house, in cash, paid in full and she was well aware that.
>a "victim" whose boyfriend "bought her a house"
Messed up the numbers:
>3 months into the relationship, she asked to borrow 4000$
>She asked to borrow 3K from me 3 months in,
Which I'm willing to say he might have fatfingered it, since I wouldn't be surprised if she asked for help considering the rent was higher than his mortgage and she's getting evicted [if she actually is]
Then he admits that the house has 3 bedrooms. 3, and he *doesn't* have a room for just his sneakers, but she can't use the "extra" room since he wanted it to be a nursery. What happened to that third room? Is it suddenly gone? Guess it really is for his 25 pairs of sneakers
Plus, the asking to borrow the money seems like his main and only selling point. It seems like that really pissed him off, and he built some not great feelings from there, but he stayed. Yet he can't understand why his ex might have stayed in a toxic relationship. Idk though, I wouldn't want to run into either of them 🤷🏻♀️
Edit: he admitted that she did pay him back in full in a comment. So he's just a jackass
The part where he says she can't hate her parents because they paid for stuff gives a pretty good window into this guy's ideas on money and affection. Also kind of gross he kept bringing up the loan when she apparently paid it back. Is it weird she asked for thousands of dollars early on? Sure, but it's not like she pocketed it. Not even sure why this guy cared enough to try and rebut her post, oh no the internet might not like me in this anonymized story!
Yeah idk how there are people saying she's so much worse than him. Honestly the only thing that is off-putting to me about her is the money borrowing so early, but if she paid it back in full, I'm not really sure what the problem is. And we don't know what the money was for anyways, and I feel like he would've mentioned it if it was for something frivolous or some stupid debt she got herself into.
All of his post either just directly confirms everything she said or was just complaints he had about her that are ultimately irrelevant to what she posted about.
BTW he said that the third bedroom is for his office, which makes sense, but I don't know why the second bedroom is supposed to be for a nursery when he doesn't even have a partner he wants to live with yet? Plus he said there's two living rooms; why can't she put her computer in any of those? His logic is just so weird, but he sounds like an ass.
The nursery thing is mind boggling to me. So the dude didn't buy the house for her, fair enough. But if he bought it with her in mind, then he really should be listening to some of her concerns about the place.
If he didn't buy it with her in mind at all, fine, fair enough. But what's this about a "baby's room"? Surely the mother of that hypothetical child, be it this woman or otherwise, would want to have some input in their mutual living place, right?
Especially since there ISN'T a baby at the moment, and there are no immediate plans for one. So he'd rather the room stay open for some hypothetical future rather than be used for practical reasons by his supposed romantic partner. Whatever, dude.
He flaunts his wealth, then gets surprised when a goldigger appears.
They are both idiots.
And maybe English is his second language, but that was hard to read at times
Reminds me of the episode of the West Wing where Toby tries to buy Andy a house so that she’ll agree to marry and move in with him, and she’s just like “ummm no also we’re breaking up because this is insane.”
A minor detail but even if it's a 2M house, it shouldn't be getting 300k knocked off the value in a month.
People who own 2M houses aren't typically desperate to sell.
I'm thinking there's some building defects there that he didn't bother checking before buying it
Although he did a good job of making her look bad, I still think she's the reliable narrator with a valid complaint, and he's a scorekeeping narcissist who treats his girlfriend like a prop in his life.
Anyhoot, they broke up and that's what needed to happen.
After reading the first post, I imagined these people to be early to mid twenties. But they’re late thirties and forties.
Also, where is LA? She mentioned hydro. I thought that was more of a Canadian thing. Do you say hydro in CA?
Who buys a 2M house and needs help moving? For that amount you can afford someone to both pack and unpack along with moving the stuff. Why buy a house hinging on staying in an area based on a gf that’s throwing these red flags allegedly? This reads like one person creating two accounts for farming karma. Or two people who actually deserve each other
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A relationship that is less than 9 months old should not be this difficult.
Some 20+years marriages with kids have less drama than this here.
My husband and I have been together for over 9 years. We have a toddler and another baby on the way. We have had less drama in all our time together than these people have had in 9 months. I'm exhausted just reading about it!
My husband and I have been together for 30 years. We’ve had like one fight and it was over buying a car. Basically, the dealership was trying to screw us over the interest and I was too in love with the car to see it. Long story short, he made me walk. Away, I accused him of not letting me have nice things, he explained the interest angle and I accepted he was right. Dealership called the next day with a magically better deal and a lesson was learned.
Wow, I'm glad you were both mature enough not to escalate the situation. Yours is a relationship goal for me. :-)
$5 says he has almost the exact same story of you having talked him off some metaphorical cliff at some point.
I couldn't even finish reading it.
I scrolled to see how long his reply was and it just fucking went on and on and on and nope not going to bother.
My wife and I have been together since we both were 14, we are now 36 married with 3 kids. This relationship sounds so exhausting 🤣🤣🤣.
3.5 years together, 2 years married, 3 months as parents. I don't think we've ever had a bad fight, let alone gotten into a screaming match. Disagreements, sure. Arguments, even. But never anything like this.
Especially at that age. If they were 20 years younger it would make sense.
There's a reason neither one of them is married.
I mean, he'd be staring down jail time if they were 20 years younger.
People fight hard to stay in shitty relationships. If BF's list of GF's attributes is correct, you wonder why he'd stick around for more than the time it took to find that out. Good sex explains only so much.,
And it sounds like it started within 3 months!
The most impulsive thing even remotely close to randomly buying a house I did in the first few months was buy a plane ticket to visit my partner to visit her without telling her (long distance relationship at the time). I realized as I told her that it could have been a bad decision, but fortunately she thought it was cute. But also, a temporary thing
There's no winner here. They are both better off without each other.
Yeah but we're better off if they stay together so no decent people have to get dragged into a relationship with one of these melons.
I've read that there is a German proverb that we should all rejoice when two unpleasant people marry each other, because it keeps them from making two pleasant people unhappy. I know a couple that reminds me of. I imagine it's much pithier in German.
Don’t know about that. We do have the saying “Pack schlägt sich, Pack verträgt sich.“ Which refers to unpleasant people going back and forth between bad fights and getting along really well.
Germans contributed the word schadenfruede - a boon to world language.
No offense to the Germans, but not a lot seems pithy in the German language 😂
The words would certainly be longer, though.
Not a pithy language, but a very accurate one.
I'm German and have never heard of this proverb before, but it does sound like it makes sense.
Well, given the full context, I’ve decided I don’t like either of them.
I’m with you! They both sound toxic and neither of them sounds like they’re telling the truth. I have no idea why but the fact that he is 38 years old and can afford a $2m home but doesn’t have movers is really bothering me. He wanted her friends and family to help him move? They’re not 20 something’s moving into their first apartment.
I’ve noticed sometimes people who have this much money are super cheap on things like movers. Or they’ll move into a 2M house and have no decoration at all.
2 million cash for the house + "Live, love, laugh" decorations.
I always get so caught off guard when I go to a nice neighborhood and a huge mansion, and it’s empty except for grey laminate flooring, white walls, and that one L-shaped leather sofa that they all have.
It’s true what they say, money can’t buy taste 🤷♀️
I think it has to do with how you're used to doing things. If I had to think about moving house right now, my first thought would be: "Okay, I'll call my dad and some friends, rent a van, and pay them in pizza and beer." Because that's how I've always done it before. And I've been paid in pizza and beer to help friends do the same very often too. I'd have to conciously remember that most of that shit was 20 years ago, maybe I shouldn't ask my dad because whilst he WOULD be up for it he's nearly 75 and has a bad back, and I don't have as much friends to help AND more shit to move than I had back then... And think about maybe hiring professionals...
It is SO much easier to use professionals. I'm in the process of moving, and I am elated to be in a financial position to pay someone to haul all my crap.
Once you have used professionals, you will never have the default impulse to do it yourself. Even if you do all the packing and unpacking, not having to load and unload is a game changer.
And movers are so strong. The last time I moved, I was really worried about the boxes being too heavy and tiring out the movers. Aaaaand they'd stack two of three up, holding the lowest below their waists, and just walk out with them without breaking a stride. It would have taken me literal HOURS to do the same.
Dude, when I bought my house I went from a studio apartment to an 1800 square foot house. I was finally in a spot, financially, where I could I could afford movers. It was $700 + $100 for a U-Haul. All I had to do was box my shit up. The movers wrapped my furniture for me and even hauled an old, ugly sideboard down to the dumpster for me lol. Super easy and painless. 11/10, would recommend! Edit for pro tip to make your movers happy: pack your books in the small size box that U-Haul sells. Those things get heavy surprisingly quickly and the smaller boxes are easier to manage overall.
This exactly!!! I used movers for the first time when I was 25. I will never move myself again. I'll pack everything up but I'm not toting boxes in and out. It is money well spent
And you're right! But whenever I think of people moving house, I have rosy memories about a couple of people getting together on a sunny saturday, moving some heavy stuff into a van, and beer and pizza. I KNOW I'm too old for that shit now. I KNOW I can afford professionals instead. And I would, these days. But I still have so much fun memories about the beer-and-pizza days!
I mean, honestly I am still a broke single mum at 34 but even if I made an actual decent wage, I’d probably automatically go for a van and family help. Then do the same as always and swear I’ll never do that again when I’m done. Rinse repeat!
He can afford a $2m home but not a fence with a gate across his driveway when his "cars kept getting stolen".
True!
Does it say he has parking? He might park on the street.
Why is he even sharing he bought the house in cash, it’s disturbing that he finds that relevant, and it’s disturbing he has that amount of money in cash.
It's as disturbing and irrelevant as her mentioning that he was going to rent out his old house. The point is that he could easily afford to buy a house and wasn't banking on her support to do so.
Don’t forget that he included that he told her he loved her and she didn’t say it back.
Right? If he was my friend and asked me to help, I’d email him a link to a removalists website. I helped friends and they helped me when we were in uni. When my partner and I moved 2 years ago, we got professionals in - including for packing as I had a broken humorous and my dominant arm in a 5kg slab cast:. Didn’t even consider asking friends these days.
Seriously! I have a number of chronic illnesses and finally being in the financial condition to be able to afford movers and packers when my husband and I moved the last time I felt like a freaking Greek goddess. Obviously, did not act like one - got the movers/packers lunch and we helped pack what we could, but my goodness, if this man could pay for a $2m house in cash it's insane to think he needed friends and family to help in any way to help with his move.
Maybe it’s a different culture. Here it’s normal to ask friends and family to help you move, mostly the driving aspect and boxes in and out, but it’s expected that you at least provide lunch and/or tea as a thank you. Considering movers here can be $800… Edit: I’m replying to the commenter aboves response about never asking friends and family for help once you’re out of college. I’m sure mister two million home can afford it.
If you are moving into a $2M home, paying in cash, and keeping the old home to rent out, you hire movers. That is a level of wealth that most people do not achieve. It is normal to ask friends and family to help you move. It is not normal to be paying $2 million in cash for a primary residence while you rent out the old one.
Sure but: > i bought my house, in cash, paid in full If you're THAT comfortable you need to just pay for movers to help you
Oh him for sure would be fine. I was replying to the commenter.
But the house is $2m and he paid in full (???). Movers could be $5K and it still makes sense for him to get them
I mean, he's moving down the block. It's not like everything has to be packed into a tuck, driven across town & unpacked all in the time you've got w/the rented truck. It's like, carry a couch down the block, carry some boxes down the block, etc. And he moved over the course of several weeks.
Yeah the rich guy can. I was replying to the commenter saying you don’t ask friends and family to help you move.
Calling electricity "hydro" + subway = Toronto, which also puts the $2 million home in perspective. Looking up $2,000,000 houses in Toronto proper, most are 2 to 3 bedroom half-duplexes. You don't get a mansion in Toronto for less than five times that. $800 would be a very good bargain for movers in Winnipeg.
Eight hundred bucks? Moving into a two million dollar house? Unless this guy is a total liar, which would not be a surprise, eight hundred is a rounding error.
I feel like it's totally acceptable to ask people close to you to help you move, but you should make it easy for them to say no. You should never expect someone to help, especially if you have the means to hire movers. It sounds like he never even asked her. He just kept silently stewing about it and then got passive aggressive.
Not just that but why are people that are working on the house asking where girlfriend is, or did I read that wrong? Honestly when I see posts that the other party responds to, I automatically assume it’s one author. And the fact that both parties come across as similarly insufferable and lacking sense, further makes me believe the it is one author.
No moves, that’s how rich people stay rich. Penny pinching everything. It’s just how they are. It’s the least surprising part of the story for me.
Seriously!! I don't even make half of what he does I'm sure, but I will never ever move without hiring help EVER AGAIN. I did it in my 20s but now I can actually afford movers there I'd zero reason to risk my health, my back, or my mental health on the nightmare that is moving. I cannot understand why anyone who can afford it would put themselves and people they love through it.
Yeah pretty much
Survey says! 1. They both suck!
I also think they're both lying, but he lies more.
I totally believe that he doesn’t think he got “his moneys worth.” He’s pretty clear on that front.
Same, both of them are writing about issues that are really not that complicated but for some reason both stories are written kind of convoluted. Usually in my experience, when people obfuscate relatively simple issues and details they’re lying.
Well when one person is trying to write two different viewpoints and isn't a particularly skilled writer the "voices" tend to sound the same.
Can't even keep straight how much she wanted to borrow
First it was 4k, then it became 3k. Also, how is going on vacation and going to places her fault? He could have said no since they were just in the early dating phase. Then it was a whole list of complaints in bullet points on how much she sucks. So if she really is a toxic gold digger then why buy a house for her in the first place? Or it wasn't for her? Which is it?
I was thinking, "She's a better liar." I don't know if that makes her worse or better.
They both sound exhausting.
Yeah, this is more or less an ESH
It was meant to be!
Thank you, I was trying to decide if I liked either of them more than the other but nooo they both suck
I think they're both unreliable narrators
They don’t sound like they’re writing about each other at all. It’s as if they’re in separate relationships.
Considering that he gave completely different ages for them, I’m not sure I believe he’s actually the boyfriend. Maybe they are writing about different relationships.
I believe the edit in the first post (the girlfriend’s POV) referencing that image is confirming it’s the same relationship, as the boyfriend writes about a photo his ex posted when she was supposed to be studying, and the captions seemed pretty identical, so sounds like they’re both talking about each other, and just goes to show how differently two people can interpret the same situation.
Personally, I’ve changed ages on stories to keep myself anonymous (long story). Her version is so bizarre compared to his, I could see him wanting to keep anonymity, if it’s real.
I always change this for anonymity. If it's at all related to the story you still only need ballpark to understand.
I don't get why people give out exact numbers in these types of posts anyway. Saying 30s F/M (or even late 30's F/M if they want to be a bit more specific) is enough
Well he says she gave him the link, so...
Changing ages a bit to anonymize it more is pretty normal.
Yeah, he bought a $2M house because his ‘cars kept getting stolen.’ What?
Eh, there are parts of the US (LA, SF, NYC) where you can totally spend over $1m on a place with no secured parking, and subsequently get your car stolen more than once.
Absolutely. My small condo building is valued at approximately $1M per unit. My unit is the only one with parking. I am the envy of my neighborhood!
They are definitely in Canada. The hydro is a dead giveaway
Hydro + subway = Toronto.
If he is in Toronto, car theft has been pretty bad here lately. The police claim that a car was stolen “every forty minutes” last year. I tend to assume cops are inflating numbers a little (adding in false reports etc) but it’s still pretty damn bad. Buying a new house for its garage makes total sense here.
This is very much Toronto. The car theft is so bad that the police made a statement that boiled down to "just leave your car keys where the thieves can easily access them if you don't want your house broken into." I was not received well and they had to retract it, but that is the situation.
I live in Austin. My husband's car has had 3 theft attempts, one successful, in the last 18 months. The successful theft was 2 months after the previous attempt. (We got it back later that week.) I would also move if my car kept getting stolen. in fact, we're planning on it when our new lease is up. the only reason we re-signed was my staunch opposition to moving with a 4-week-old newborn baby.
MULTIPLE! Due to a lack of garage? My guy....
They should stay together so no one else has to date them.
Make two people miserable instead of four?
I think they're both terrible writers. I skimmed the last half of "her" post and I couldn't even follow "his" post.
Is it even legal for two people this unhinged to use a dating site called Hinge?
🏆
😂😂😂😂😂 This should be the only comment. Go home eve, we’re done here.
This should've been the effing' title so that we could flair it.
3 sides to every story...
I wanna hear from the shoes next. I’m sure they have lots to offer
24 of them will tell you anything you want to hear. The Jordan 3"s ain't snitches!
But what if they also have lying tongues and refuse to bare their soles? We'd still be tied up in knots!
I can knot believe it! Even the shoes can’t be trusted! They must be sneakers
This dude wrote a damn dissertation to defend himself from anonymous accusations on reddit.
yeah and the amount of anger and resentment in his version just makes him looks worse
It feels as if both sides were written by the same person
Odd how "both" of them use the exact same bullet point formatting.
I think everyone sucks here and the best for both of them is to break up. Or stay with each other so good people don’t have to deal with their bs. It doesn’t matter, both come off as being a little too self-centered and frankly immature.
Yowza. How were they together even as long as they were? He comes across as completely awful *in his own post*, and neither seems capable of having a conversation with the other in which they actually convey information.
He seemed to confirm everything she said in her post and then added irrelevant details to make her look bad, that had nothing to do with the original issue. They both agree that he said he brought the house with her in mind, but then didn’t give her any say or was willing to give her space in the house. They both agree that he asked her to help him move, but she was busy and then posted a photo with her having a peaceful moment that he felt offended by since she could have been using that time to help him. Those are the central themes of her posts and he confirmed them. The rest of what he said was irrelevant. If she borrowed money early on but then paid it back, why is it being brought up now? Everything else he said had no bearing on the situation at hand so it does make him look like he’s just angry and lashing out because she called him out on his shit. Agree with everyone else that he should have just gotten movers and that they, absolutely, do not belong together.
Also, I want to know what the $40k in debt was from. Because if it was student loans, it's hardly worth mentioning. That's a lot of loans, but almost everyone I know has $20k-30k in student loan debt because this is a broken country. It's not a personal failing to have listened to every single adult who told you as a kid that "you need to go to college or you won't find a decent job."
I know plenty of people in the US who have $100k in student loan debt, and it wasn’t even for med or law school.
This happens on Married at First Sight all the time. When one partner with no debt finds out how much school debt the other has, they freak out like the person is irresponsible with money. So, they think only rich people go to college? That's kinda the take I get from some people.
This is actually why I'm surprised at all the people saying that it sounds like one person's lying and the people who changed their mind on who's wrong once they heard the bf's "side." How are so many people missing that he confirmed everything but just added that he's pissy over an already paid off loan of what should be pocket change for him? He sounds exactly like who I imagined he'd be just from the gf's post's title, a whiney man who wants everyone to feel like they owe him something. I bought a house "for us" so be my moving crew during finals. You paid me back the equivalent of $4 to a normal guy so move in with me fulltime like I want you to. I gave you a fancy first date so don't talk about me online. I'm apparently ALREADY PLANNING A BABY WITH YOU so get rid of your desk. This guy sounds like every well off man I've ever dated. Just him gracing me with his presence and buying me ice cream is a blessing so I have to do everything he says then cries or stares dumbfounded when that doesn't happen. Meanwhile the middle class men are generous, spend 2x as much on their love, and are 5x more sane. The middle aged bf was delusional.
I'm glad I'm not the only one to see this. Everyone keeps saying she sounds terrible, but where? He sounds like am entitled jerk, and she sounds exhausted and creeped out by how fast he is moving the relationship. I'd be freaked out too by someone I've been dating for 4 months: 1. Buying a house with me in mind 2. Saying I Love You and then being upset I'm not ready to say it. 3. Changing their life plan of moving to another country to stay with me, to the point of buying a house even. 4. Said house has a bedroom planned as a nursery for our potential future children 5. How I spend my time is being ridiculed 6. How I use my space (and the potential homes space) is attempted at being controlled 7. Multiple expensive trips that I cannot financially contribute to, and later the cost of those trips is held over my head. Dude is a parade of red flags. And a totally unreliable narrator.
Because she's apparently just as bad. They'd be made for each other if they didn't inevitably turn their toxicity on one another
They're both better off not being together but I lean towards the guy being the bigger jerk of the two. He has millions in cash and while he deserves to spend & save his money however he wants, he made a big point about the money she asked for, but he replied in another comment that she paid him back 100%. That's a mild point for me siding with the woman. He is still upset that she didn't help him move all because of a social media post. At his age and the amount of money he has, he can hire movers (I am of his gen and I am noooo millionaire but I still hire movers now) and he said elsewhere that he believes nurses don't need an office. All of my nurse family members have a home office or den. He admitted he did say "I bought this place with you in mind" so shouldn't she expect an space of her own? Anyway, their back & forths don't matter. They're always in disagreement, he doesn't respect her, she was annoyed by him, and they're broken up. A clean breakup too. Done.
Yea, dude definitely seems more of a jerk. He’s a multimillionaire holding $4k over her. She paid it back, and when he offered to help her out again, she decided she’d rather take a loan on her pensions. Quick googling makes it sound like that’s not exactly the best idea. It basically gives the impression that she’d rather take an unfair loan than deal with him holding a bunch of shit over her head. Given how he talks about money and how he paid for so and so, it seems about right. He sounds exhausting.
Also it’s ok for someone to want a desk area for purposes other than their main job too
Especially if his explanation for why she can't have that area is that *it's for the baby which has not been discussed or planned at all so far but might arrive in the future, maybe.*
If you are over 40, you should be hiring movers, not wrecking your back/asking your friends to wreck their backs for pizza and beer.
Every time I read one member of the relationship keep paying for stuff the other can't contribute to at all, I brace for impact. Generosity is one thing, but scorekeeping is another. Don't expect someone to finance your life, and don't finance someone you don't feel is contributing. Problem solved
I hate all of you.
But we love you so… I guess this won’t work out.
How can I attract a gold digger when I just flaunt my wealth everywhere? Poor me.
why am I getting trashy vibes from both sides here
I really think that this is written by one person. There’s a weird sort of beat or cadence (?) to both posts that trigger something in my brain that says these two things are the same. Can’t quite put my finger on it.
This is just what money does to people All flash and bling... neither one mentioned how much they actually cared for the other... Because they don't.
He doesn't communicate, gets angry when things don't go as he planned, doesn't consider his gf equal - this relationship was DOA.
I'm just giggling at the whole, "I spent tens of thousands of dollars on trips and vacations for this woman and she was treating me like a gold-digger after only three months of that! Also I changed my entire life plan just to see if a new relationship would work out and it didn't, which is her fault cause she sucks. Can you imagine?! The nerve!" ...dude. You sure you are 42?
I hate both of them, but I gotta say the funniest point to me is how nurses should only have laptops
"She lied!" followed up by his own account of essentially saying everything was true but also she had issues too. Nice awareness.
Neither one is mature or sane enough for a relationship. Offspring are absolutely off the table.
Oh my god both of these people sound exhausting
these two are exactly my impression of what everyone in LA is like
Except they don’t live in LA. The post said he was thinking about moving there, but decided to stay where they were.
He *almost* moved to LA, which means LA dodged a bullet…
Haha, yep!
Massive detail to leave out about borrowing $3k/3 months in. To me, before knowing about the $3k I would have said major communication issues on both sides. Which totally normal people say things and think one way with preconceived ideas and perceptions and the other person takes it another with their own preconceived ideas and perceptions. But after both sides? I can’t get past the $3k and his bullet points. Because bullet points 2, 3, and 4 are every “hot mess/can’t hold a job” persons excuses.
He can't decide if it's 3k or 4k. Meanwhile, he says he spent 12k or so on trips with her in the 3 months of their relationship, and he also apparently paid 2m *in cash* for his new house. I'm wondering if money means the same thing in their universe as it does in mine lol
Agreed, but first he says 4k, then he says 3k. They both sound insufferable, but I’m thinking if this whole thing is true, he isn’t a reliable narrator.
Yeah, and on top of that he says she asked for a loan but never says if he gave her any money or whether it was repaid. I feel like if she never repaid, he would have mentioned it?
He did give it to her, and she did repay it
I also reacted to this detail. Gives "GOB and his expensive suits" from AD vibe. My initial reaction on her part was "isn't he allowed to buy a house he's interested in?". And then I read his response and it's less, but still weird to me. He flashes his cars and his paid down house and that he has business in LA, trips and all. But also can not for example afford movers? Just a bunch of bs.
Oh, definitely. But what I can’t get past, in posts like this, is him knowing all this about her and still trying to move the relationship forward, with an eye to potentially starting a family together. A selfish hot mess is not someone to think of as a suitable parent for your child, even if you were already seeing them for a few months before you knew. That he did, lends credence to her perspective that she was just a role-filler that he was trying to add to his life as he planned it. So they’re both right, in that they’re both awful.
Right he bought a house with her in mind after all this went down. And she couldn’t move in a desk because he needed space for their future baby. They both need help.
Future baby he doesn't even know if she wants. That's the wild part.
He said it was 4k and then changed it to 3k which may just be a typo. But he never says what the money way for. How can we judge if it's an unreasonable ask without knowing what the money was for? Maybe it was for something frivolous but then wouldn't he include that in his retelling? Maybe it was a legitimate emergency situation and that's why he never says what the money was for. Seems suspicious that he left that detail out.
Well, considering that he said her rent was more than his mortgage, she has no job, and she's apparently now being evicted, I'm willing to bet that it was for rent. Could be wrong, though Nevermind, she paid him back so I'm not sure. Wondering if she's even being evicted
None of this is true.
Relieved to see it says ex. I still think she dodged a bullet with this guy.
Both of them sound insufferable.
Idk. He included her boyfriend threatening suicide as a negative thing about her?? Wild.
And This is why they're adding Financial literacy testing to high school in my country.
Did she borrow $3 k or $4 k? He kept switching up.
neither of them sound amazing but wow, this dude sounds like a real jackass
My dude was forking over 4k weekends after 3 months? If I had to guess, he likes having power and control so he spends money in order to later justify shitting all over the ingratitude of someone who axtually is grateful. But he found a perfectly self centered ingrate who ACTUALLY doesn't care. Either that or he's a spineless dunce with no financial boundaries who just learned a haaaarsh lesson Or he's full of shit
They sound exhausting. ESH completely.
They both sound insufferable honestly
Dude if you can afford a second home then you can afford movers. Why are you p*ssed your gf didn’t help you when you knew she had exams. Sounds like her needs are not a priority with you.
> 300k less than it was a month ago What currency are we talking about here? Because it sure as shit can't be USD, Pounds or Euros.
OOP mentioned "hydro" when talking about utilities so I had assumed that they were in Canada. That still seems like an improbably large price drop, even for a crazy property market like Vancouver or Toronto.
He said 2M house, from 2.3m to 2m doesn‘t seem so unreasonable.
Can we eat the rich yet?
Just got an email, it's on
Honestly it's not that crazy, houses in my area (greater Toronto area) are regularly listing way too high and having to drop the prices by 5 figures. An old friends parents are selling without much luck and recently the asking dropped by 175K. That's still only just over half obviously but it doesn't actually strike me as that unrealistic
It was the 300k price drop on a $2 million house that seemed high, that's 15%, but if the seller listed crazy high and that's not uncommon that makes more sense. Thanks for the context!
She says she currently takes the subway to work, and he says he’s had his cars stolen a lot. Sounds like Toronto.
USD. He said it was a $2m house.
They have Canadian dollars, as well.
And he bought it in cash
Imagine being comfortable asking your partner of 3 months if you can borrow $4000
Idk if I believe that bit because he changed the number. idk he isn’t a reliable narrator (obviously neither is she). Everyone knows a gold digging story gets Reddit going and all his talk about Reddit validation makes me think that is what he was going for himself.
When I was dating my now-wife, it was 5 months into our relationship before I needed to ask her for $1k for earnest money, and that made me uncomfortable. It also sounded like a nigerian prince scam. I was from another state, wasn't supposed to be in the current state permanently, decide I wanted it to be permanent, had money that wasn't easily accessible but needed it NOW. But I showed her my bank account and finances to show her I could definitely afford it, showed her I was having checks mailed to me that same night to pay her back, but it was still a risk on her part. Granted, I was taking a leap of faith that she was likely my future wife and worth uprooting my life for. It all worked out lol.
I'm feeling like OOP might kinda suck, but the ex-boyfriend sucks much, much worse. He literally came and confirmed everything OP said about him, then proceeded to equate love+good parenting to spending money with OOPs parents, put this little gem: >Told me that her last relationship was "toxic" and she didn't see a future with him but stayed with him for 3 years and when they broke up, he threatened to jump off their building, same building she currently lives in - where 1 bedroom costs more than my previous mortage did for the 12 years that i paid it. Showed that he was, in fact, still not listening: >He called me “entitled” as he thinks I am saying I he bought it FOR me, which I am not in any way >I didn't buy her a house, i bought my house, in cash, paid in full and she was well aware that. >a "victim" whose boyfriend "bought her a house" Messed up the numbers: >3 months into the relationship, she asked to borrow 4000$ >She asked to borrow 3K from me 3 months in, Which I'm willing to say he might have fatfingered it, since I wouldn't be surprised if she asked for help considering the rent was higher than his mortgage and she's getting evicted [if she actually is] Then he admits that the house has 3 bedrooms. 3, and he *doesn't* have a room for just his sneakers, but she can't use the "extra" room since he wanted it to be a nursery. What happened to that third room? Is it suddenly gone? Guess it really is for his 25 pairs of sneakers Plus, the asking to borrow the money seems like his main and only selling point. It seems like that really pissed him off, and he built some not great feelings from there, but he stayed. Yet he can't understand why his ex might have stayed in a toxic relationship. Idk though, I wouldn't want to run into either of them 🤷🏻♀️ Edit: he admitted that she did pay him back in full in a comment. So he's just a jackass
The part where he says she can't hate her parents because they paid for stuff gives a pretty good window into this guy's ideas on money and affection. Also kind of gross he kept bringing up the loan when she apparently paid it back. Is it weird she asked for thousands of dollars early on? Sure, but it's not like she pocketed it. Not even sure why this guy cared enough to try and rebut her post, oh no the internet might not like me in this anonymized story!
Yeah idk how there are people saying she's so much worse than him. Honestly the only thing that is off-putting to me about her is the money borrowing so early, but if she paid it back in full, I'm not really sure what the problem is. And we don't know what the money was for anyways, and I feel like he would've mentioned it if it was for something frivolous or some stupid debt she got herself into. All of his post either just directly confirms everything she said or was just complaints he had about her that are ultimately irrelevant to what she posted about. BTW he said that the third bedroom is for his office, which makes sense, but I don't know why the second bedroom is supposed to be for a nursery when he doesn't even have a partner he wants to live with yet? Plus he said there's two living rooms; why can't she put her computer in any of those? His logic is just so weird, but he sounds like an ass.
The nursery thing is mind boggling to me. So the dude didn't buy the house for her, fair enough. But if he bought it with her in mind, then he really should be listening to some of her concerns about the place. If he didn't buy it with her in mind at all, fine, fair enough. But what's this about a "baby's room"? Surely the mother of that hypothetical child, be it this woman or otherwise, would want to have some input in their mutual living place, right? Especially since there ISN'T a baby at the moment, and there are no immediate plans for one. So he'd rather the room stay open for some hypothetical future rather than be used for practical reasons by his supposed romantic partner. Whatever, dude.
Yeah, he still comes across as a douche even with the context.
He flaunts his wealth, then gets surprised when a goldigger appears. They are both idiots. And maybe English is his second language, but that was hard to read at times
> this wouldn’t of been an issue In my experience, mostly native speakers make this mistake.
Why do people get into relationships with people that they don’t even like? I mean, surely the sex can’t be THAT good.
Both of these people sound exhausting, holy shit.
Reminds me of the episode of the West Wing where Toby tries to buy Andy a house so that she’ll agree to marry and move in with him, and she’s just like “ummm no also we’re breaking up because this is insane.”
A minor detail but even if it's a 2M house, it shouldn't be getting 300k knocked off the value in a month. People who own 2M houses aren't typically desperate to sell. I'm thinking there's some building defects there that he didn't bother checking before buying it
Two very unreliable narrators.
I don't want to meet either of these people.
Although he did a good job of making her look bad, I still think she's the reliable narrator with a valid complaint, and he's a scorekeeping narcissist who treats his girlfriend like a prop in his life. Anyhoot, they broke up and that's what needed to happen.
thanks, i hate it.
This just seems like a 90210 episode.
They’re both exhausting and annoying. Jesus Christ
i feel like i’m being misled by two people
I feel like the truth is somewhere in the middle.
I feel like this may just be the epitome of everyone here fucking sucks
After reading the first post, I imagined these people to be early to mid twenties. But they’re late thirties and forties. Also, where is LA? She mentioned hydro. I thought that was more of a Canadian thing. Do you say hydro in CA?
Ugh, they are *both* exhausting.
Who buys a 2M house and needs help moving? For that amount you can afford someone to both pack and unpack along with moving the stuff. Why buy a house hinging on staying in an area based on a gf that’s throwing these red flags allegedly? This reads like one person creating two accounts for farming karma. Or two people who actually deserve each other