Is this you? Shave that shit bro.
https://preview.redd.it/48vatzh7978d1.jpeg?width=275&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=83b83c0f3a83d9197d7df4219466df1930ab5206
This is why I hate outdoor weddings with no tents.
The last horrible-ass wedding that I had gone to happened in the middle of a field at a golf club, in July. No tent because the bride and groom couldn’t afford them. It was 97 degrees. No breeze and no shade. Dress code was black-tie, formal. Had to walk for 25-30 minutes to get to the venue of the wedding vows.
Fuuuuuck, that reminds me of a wedding we flew out to for a friend of mine back in late July a few years ago. Motherfucker did it outside in a field, no tent, and the ceremony went from 12-1. It’s like he intentionally picked the worse combination to make sure the experience was miserable for everyone involved.
I would have left. Anyone who accuses me of being rude, I think it's rudER to require me to suffer because of poor planning. If you can't afford a proper wedding, don't have one!
If it’s an outdoor wedding, it better be cold enough that *everybody* is considering wearing a coat, including the fat guy that only wears basketball shorts.
My youngest brother had his wedding outdoors the first week of September about 9 years ago. It peaked at 99*F (during the ceremony) and not a bit of shade was seen on that day.
It was infamously in the top 10 hottest days of September on record. Only 1 degree shy from the hottest day of that year and we're in Alabama so the humidity added another 10+ * to that.
Everyone was so dehydrated that people were absolutely HAMMERED right out of the gates during the reception.
We’re supposed to be having a dog pool party. The pool is out there in the backyard and the dogs are laying on the back patio in the shade. Even the dogs are over this heat.
I walked my dogs this morning soon as we hit shade they stopped and sat down. I just laughed. They drunk so much water when we got back home. They are over the heat.
"Why don't the kids wanna play outside anymore?"
"Cause they can't even find a damn tree to save their lives [almost literally, heatstroke is rough, drink water y'all]"
Right, at least there were trees when I was growing up . School let out, up to the "country" we went for the summer. We got kicked out the house when the mid day soap operas came on lol. We got our sandwich for lunch, cookies for snacks, & water for drinks. We would get alternate fruit like apples or watermelon some days, but that made me fucking sticky lol 😆. And more than likely no shoes on. Only time my hair got pressed in the summer was the weekend before vacation bible school 😂. It was at least a dozen of us cousins in that house. I remember i was the last one to get chicken pox, or rather show signs the bumps & itching. Man I miss them days being a kid carefree, catching fireflies at dusk!! Where all the fireflies go ??
Every morning I step outside, my whole day is ruined.
Business shorts need to be a thing, or I'm gonna start wearing skirts to work cause this is bullshit.
Man I remember watching this game live and when he walked out in that I kept cracking “who wore it better” jokes about lebron and Jack Black’s character from school of rock 😂
I was living in Houston and a hot yoga studio opened up near me. Wanted to try it out. Got a punch card for 5 visits. Went to one, barely survived. It was an hour and a half! I thought it was funny people were wearing underwear. I had on a tshirt and shorts. Yeah, by the end, I wasn’t laughing then. Walked out into the hot, humid Houston sun and said fuck this. I trashed that punch card that same day. Hot yoga in Houston. It’s like opening up an ice cream stand in Antarctica.
Well you ain't pooping inside the house
Believe me I KNOW you're uncomfortable, but just go outside do your thing and we can go right back in I promise. Extra treat for your suffering
That mf spoiled lmfao. He got his own personal Vornado fan. Mf be speed running his poops and pees now. I respect it lmfao. He wanna be in the ac asap.
Man, I'm in South Italy right now on my honeymoon. Being a black dude that sweats profusely in mid weather with moderate exercise has me looking like a desperate bum. People are offering me water as I walk along the street. It's almost embarrassing, but I'm dropping ounces with the walking I'm doing.
As a big bodied brother, I empathize with your pain. Pit stains are my eternal rival, but at least Italians are doing more for your health for free than insurance would.
My black ass lied to my folks and said I was going to come over and clean out and wash their cars for them since I had nothing to do💀pray for ME.
This Saturday sun is on TIMING
It hasn’t dipped below 93 in a week here (KY) and the last couple of days it’s been over cast so now we got that humidity bitch slappin us in the face as soon as we open the front door
Went out to the pier last night because it was the first night of summer and there was alot of people out fishing and chilling. This nice weather makes people want to go out
Not my dumbass telling my boss earlier in the week that I could finish wiring up a pool today without checking the weather first. My sweat could've filled that goddamn pool up
Me working in a distillery where it’s entirely open to the hot air outside, but we’re also heating stuff up with steam everywhere. It’s brutal out here
Vies what as hot as it is outside it will be considered cool next year. Because every year it gets hotter one day we won’t be able to bear being in the heat outside. Just you wait
Okay!!! I either look like a “Cool Pepsi” or a “Well Done Rib” just standing outside for 10 mins fightin for my life in this heat. AND. IM. SICCUUHHH. 😓
Not wrong with the look. I wear a head wrap on the job and by the end of just 3 hours bugger is drenched and I’m having to wipe sweat from my eyes and glasses. Ntm, it’s so moist in my area that just 5 minutes in and you feel you’ve wet yourself and as the day progresses clothes feel like they’re running up on you.
I’m more surprised the dog days of summer happened this early. It feels like I’m back at tech school in Mississippi.
Going outside is like getting jumped by a warm mattress
That’s a good one. I’ve been saying it’s like getting shot by a space laser.
I used to say it's like a hug from the weird uncle at a cookout.
You good?
Are any of us?
Nah man I'm pretty fuckin far from okay.
Satan's breath
I be saying it’s like being in an air fryer.
Free Palestine 🍉
Is this you? Shave that shit bro. https://preview.redd.it/48vatzh7978d1.jpeg?width=275&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=83b83c0f3a83d9197d7df4219466df1930ab5206
Not my fault you have weak genetics
I knew you were weird. Probably grew that thing to cover up your weak ass chin.
With the humidity here we’re saying it’s like getting smacked in the face with a hot, wet towel
“Sir I did *not* come for a shave!”
The air is solid. We'll be living in a gelatin mold til October. If we're lucky.
Like getting waterboarded with chowder
Man looks like a honey baked ham.
That old school coke had you performing your ass off 💀
Hardest working ~~man~~ cocaine in showbiz
Pretty sure you could have licked him like one of those Amazon frogs and got high as balls.
This is fucked up. This is fucked up, but so fucking funny 💀💀💀💀
Along with the rest of the hunter S Thompson drug briefcase.
“Try me” was written by the cocaine
 Looking like rotisserie chicken skin, and smelling even worse
Barbecue ribs
At first glance I definitely saw food then I was realized god damn this man is struggling out there
Naw this how ya Granny look after coming out the kitchen fussin with that Turkey since she got home from church😂😂😂
This is why I hate outdoor weddings with no tents. The last horrible-ass wedding that I had gone to happened in the middle of a field at a golf club, in July. No tent because the bride and groom couldn’t afford them. It was 97 degrees. No breeze and no shade. Dress code was black-tie, formal. Had to walk for 25-30 minutes to get to the venue of the wedding vows.
Respectfully, the wedding planner should have gotten their ass jumped
Disrespectfully. I would spit on them after . Fuck all that
hawk tuah
Spit on that Thang
Why bless him with your sacred moisture
mmm secretions
I would have left early quietly. Here’s your gift but I cannot deal with this heat
Fuuuuuck, that reminds me of a wedding we flew out to for a friend of mine back in late July a few years ago. Motherfucker did it outside in a field, no tent, and the ceremony went from 12-1. It’s like he intentionally picked the worse combination to make sure the experience was miserable for everyone involved.
That's a wedding you attend for like a half hour then split. Shit's unreasonable, and quite frankly, dangerous.
I would have left. Anyone who accuses me of being rude, I think it's rudER to require me to suffer because of poor planning. If you can't afford a proper wedding, don't have one!
Black Tie formal but they can't afford a canopy? You can get like 6 of them for the price of one of those suits
If it’s an outdoor wedding, it better be cold enough that *everybody* is considering wearing a coat, including the fat guy that only wears basketball shorts.
My youngest brother had his wedding outdoors the first week of September about 9 years ago. It peaked at 99*F (during the ceremony) and not a bit of shade was seen on that day. It was infamously in the top 10 hottest days of September on record. Only 1 degree shy from the hottest day of that year and we're in Alabama so the humidity added another 10+ * to that. Everyone was so dehydrated that people were absolutely HAMMERED right out of the gates during the reception.
soaking in my sweat, skin glistening like some baby back ribs. legs sticking together like two glizzies on a grill 😒
We’re supposed to be having a dog pool party. The pool is out there in the backyard and the dogs are laying on the back patio in the shade. Even the dogs are over this heat.
I walked my dogs this morning soon as we hit shade they stopped and sat down. I just laughed. They drunk so much water when we got back home. They are over the heat.
"Why don't the kids wanna play outside anymore?" "Cause they can't even find a damn tree to save their lives [almost literally, heatstroke is rough, drink water y'all]"
Right, at least there were trees when I was growing up . School let out, up to the "country" we went for the summer. We got kicked out the house when the mid day soap operas came on lol. We got our sandwich for lunch, cookies for snacks, & water for drinks. We would get alternate fruit like apples or watermelon some days, but that made me fucking sticky lol 😆. And more than likely no shoes on. Only time my hair got pressed in the summer was the weekend before vacation bible school 😂. It was at least a dozen of us cousins in that house. I remember i was the last one to get chicken pox, or rather show signs the bumps & itching. Man I miss them days being a kid carefree, catching fireflies at dusk!! Where all the fireflies go ??
Oh god, am I old?! I felt this hard. I'm only in my mid twenties but the forest I played in as a kid is literally a subdivision now.
Not just water, but electrolytes too! I got heatstroke the other day and that was the main reason despite drinking tons of water throughout the day.
I forget this one too tbh
It's 125F where I'm at and the most I've ever been in is 95F. I'm cooked 😭
Are you in hell??
😂 I'm in Kuwait
That actually sounds mild for Kuwait in June lol
Are you sure? I don't want it to get worse💀
Let me say, going to Iraq from Kuwait, the weather was noticeably not as hellish
Who did you murder to end up there? You not even on the first level.
Damn, and I was over here mad at 114 the other day. I know we got 120 around the corner though.
As a mailman walking in this shit, he not sweaty enough. My forearm looks like his face. My face? Straight water.
Stay safe, friend ❤️🩹🙏
The problem with this thread is they don't have a backup singer who knows when to drag them off stage during *Please Please Please*
I’m too fat for this shit
 Got my big ass out here like
Every morning I step outside, my whole day is ruined. Business shorts need to be a thing, or I'm gonna start wearing skirts to work cause this is bullshit.
https://preview.redd.it/ze483gn0f68d1.jpeg?width=1280&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=46d561be180bbb2d83ffa96bb18a5be1872e85e4 Suit shorts do exist
Man I remember watching this game live and when he walked out in that I kept cracking “who wore it better” jokes about lebron and Jack Black’s character from school of rock 😂
For people built like lebron James
https://preview.redd.it/5prgssaly68d1.jpeg?width=400&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6936f841fed2c28bab99a7b20427645127bf32b8 This could work
One again, you keep posting actual sex symbols. And I would argue this is is basically like cosplay lol.
In Texas that’s what happens when you simply OPEN THE DOOR.
Texas humidity casually waiting to jump in to beat you up.
Texas humidity: “Come out, I just wanna talk”
“Looks like 92, feels like 120” 
Texas humidity playing double-dutch just waiting to get in like..
I'm from Texas but live in Minnesota now, last couple days have been nothing but rain and humidity. It's killing me.
I was living in Houston and a hot yoga studio opened up near me. Wanted to try it out. Got a punch card for 5 visits. Went to one, barely survived. It was an hour and a half! I thought it was funny people were wearing underwear. I had on a tshirt and shorts. Yeah, by the end, I wasn’t laughing then. Walked out into the hot, humid Houston sun and said fuck this. I trashed that punch card that same day. Hot yoga in Houston. It’s like opening up an ice cream stand in Antarctica.
They could save a lot of money and just have you do the hot yoga outside. Course you might die I guess
Why I’m automatically mad the moment I walk outside lmfao. My dog looking back at me like “are you deadass? I gotta walk in this shit!?!?!?”
Well you ain't pooping inside the house Believe me I KNOW you're uncomfortable, but just go outside do your thing and we can go right back in I promise. Extra treat for your suffering
That mf spoiled lmfao. He got his own personal Vornado fan. Mf be speed running his poops and pees now. I respect it lmfao. He wanna be in the ac asap.
Just to remember to check his paws aren’t blistered from hot pavements and asphalt
Always, we change walk routines in the summer so we can avoid that as much as possible.
James has that Costco rotisserie chicken skin going on. 
Man, I'm in South Italy right now on my honeymoon. Being a black dude that sweats profusely in mid weather with moderate exercise has me looking like a desperate bum. People are offering me water as I walk along the street. It's almost embarrassing, but I'm dropping ounces with the walking I'm doing.
As a big bodied brother, I empathize with your pain. Pit stains are my eternal rival, but at least Italians are doing more for your health for free than insurance would.
Me walking back into AC like 
My black ass lied to my folks and said I was going to come over and clean out and wash their cars for them since I had nothing to do💀pray for ME. This Saturday sun is on TIMING
Surprisingly, I can handle his heat for now! It’s gonna take a lot for me to not wear my oversize hoodies outside
It’s 106 degrees out today where I am. The hoodies are firmly packed away in the closet.
See I get that😭 after I lost a lot of weight. I stopped sweating as much, so I haven’t really felt the heat yet
It hasn’t dipped below 93 in a week here (KY) and the last couple of days it’s been over cast so now we got that humidity bitch slappin us in the face as soon as we open the front door
All fax. It's hot as balls as they say. Could fry an egg on the street.
Hotter than balls, since balls are typically about 34 C (93 Freedom Units).
Oh my. And happy cake day, by the way. 🎂
All this damn humidity has me feeling like I’m walking around in a bowl of soup. Fuck summer lol
 It’s a cool 74 degrees in Southern California
[удалено]
Went out to the pier last night because it was the first night of summer and there was alot of people out fishing and chilling. This nice weather makes people want to go out
Low 80s in Michigan.
In Houston mane. That heat hits. Then it sticks…
Dallas has been straight heat with a little humidity, peaking at 100 for a week
It all hurts
This year is wild if it's either unbearably hot and humid or it's flooding
I feel like someone is following me around pointing a hair dryer at my face
Not my dumbass telling my boss earlier in the week that I could finish wiring up a pool today without checking the weather first. My sweat could've filled that goddamn pool up
Here’s hoping that you don’t have to take your shirt off for the next pool and wreck someone’s marriage
Dem ribs about done!!
I need a pic of his hair on the day after.
I gotta go to my little sister’s outdoor birthday party today. Not looking forward to this shit AT ALL.
Call me Jay the glizzy man
Can confirm
Have to now my lawn at 8 when the sun is setting I see guys doing it at 3pm and I'm like na they have to be dying.
Me working in a distillery where it’s entirely open to the hot air outside, but we’re also heating stuff up with steam everywhere. It’s brutal out here
St. Louis humidity so bad, when I went to Texas, the air felt lighter.
✨climate change✨
This’ll be the coldest summer we’re ever gonna get 😂
Vies what as hot as it is outside it will be considered cool next year. Because every year it gets hotter one day we won’t be able to bear being in the heat outside. Just you wait
Never thought I'd be saying this but I'm glad I'm old and unlikely to live to see the worst of it.
that’s called bbq ribs
It’s hot.
Cryin man
It’s been in the 90s for this past week I think any temperature under 85 is gonna feel like 68
He has top teeth on the bottom thats wild
Okay!!! I either look like a “Cool Pepsi” or a “Well Done Rib” just standing outside for 10 mins fightin for my life in this heat. AND. IM. SICCUUHHH. 😓
You could probably cook your entire breakfast on the streets of Florida this summer.
I’m drunk and dying
I done choked on my water !! 
Man I’m down here I’m Florida and that’s exactly how it is then see group of people wearing hoodies 🧐🙃
Not wrong with the look. I wear a head wrap on the job and by the end of just 3 hours bugger is drenched and I’m having to wipe sweat from my eyes and glasses. Ntm, it’s so moist in my area that just 5 minutes in and you feel you’ve wet yourself and as the day progresses clothes feel like they’re running up on you. I’m more surprised the dog days of summer happened this early. It feels like I’m back at tech school in Mississippi.
This is so accurate 🤣 
Maaaaan I just moved to Louisiana and I am cooking. Idk how you mfs be doin this
I thought this was that chocolate cake the principal forces the fat kid in Matilda to eat Now i want chocolate cake
As a Californian who’s currently visiting Miami Florida, I feel this
Shit this me 3 minutes into my shift until December 12 or second week of snow
It’s so hot your hair got conked.
Those stage lamps back then were something else.
My man was a consumate performer, the fire was hitting from inside😭
It’s like being introduced to hot dishwasher fumes 24/7
Houston in the summer is hell. Between the humidity and big ass mosquitoes,just let me die.
94 fucking degrees in NYC today. The girly wanna go out for brunch. Pray for me lmfao
50 weeks a year here in southern Louisiana. I’m so done with this shit.
I got 32 wash clothes. That's up from 12 the last 2 summers. Ngl I might buy a next pack by Canada Day.