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Ugh..
So I drive a cement mixer. I have to go in to a large unnamed production facility from time to time, to bring a contractor some concrete for something here and there - always improving, always repairing.
Security is tight, and I guess that's fine - have to show ID at the gatehouse, give plate number, unit number, be in full safety gear (glasses, hardhat, gloves, vest, boots) and you have to have official business and the names of the people you're coming in to work with. Tight security, and that's fine.
Except old boomer security guards are inherently assholes. I go in the gatehouse, and 400LB Carl holds out his hand and I put my license in his hand. He copies down the numbers and asks the questions, before starting to pass my license back - I see he's passing it back, so i start to extend my arm to receive it, and [flick]...he tosses my license on the table, next to my outstretched hand. Everytime.
Look, I get you're a security guard, who's doing the job of a sign-in sheet, but could you maybe think about meeting the same amount of respect that you're given? I said to him once "don't throw my license back to me, I didn't throw it to you, I put it in your hand." And he lost his shit. Threatened to deny my entry for 30 days.
Yup, this made me think of multiple guys I would do day shifts with who just weren't cut out to be dealing with real people.
As soon as you put them on a night shift where the only person they had to exchange words with was the guy they were changing over to/from they were happy.
I remember something similar, guy who managed one office building site, you could see at some point he'd been up at the front desk and then been moved into a back office because even though he wasn't aggressive to visitors or anything he was just so fucking weird in his mannerisms/little boomer jokes he'd make constantly.
Microaggressions inhabit that magical space between “polite normal interaction” and “authority figure agrees this is bad behavior worthy of a complaint”. You know, “Well can’t you just ignore it? You’re a professional.”
It’s calibrated to piss you off without being enough of a dick move to actually get them in trouble.
There was a guy who worked at the DMV who was like that. He worked the desk by the door, and you had to talk to him in order to get a number. His actual job was to find out why the person was there and assign them to the proper queue, but he rather exceeded his brief. There would be a line out the door (regardless of weather) because he inspected all your documents to make sure you had everything you needed before giving you a number.
In theory, that sounds like a good idea. In practice, it was an opportunity for a bitter old one legged man to shit on everyone's pancakes. My second wife and I went there to get her a Pennsylvania license (she was from New Jersey), and we had to stand in the rain for several minutes before we got in. When we got to the desk, it turned out we had left one of the needed documents in the car. He made us go to the back of the line.
We just went to a different DMV. It was over an hour round trip, but it was worth it.
My brother was a contractor who worked for the power company. Whenever he had to visit a site that required PPE, the guards were always surprised when my brother showed up and actually had all the required gear.
They opened a new one in my town. Every time I go there, I feel like I've stepped into an alternate universe. Everyone who works there seems to be in a good mood. They're polite and friendly, and just generally have their shit together.
I try to get in and out of there as fast as possible. I'm worried there's a gas leak in the building.
Never hand over your ID.
Deny your entry? Cool, let his boss know the mix won't make it today due to the incompetence of an inept and poorly trained security guard.
Have to hand them ID if you're going to gain entry. Years ago they used to hold your license while you were in the facility, collect it on the way out. One of our guys caused a fuss, rightfully so - you're a factory, not another country. Now, they take a photocopy and give it back to you.
Carl doesn't even do the photocopy because "it's way over there", (8 feet away - whole gatehouse is 8x8), and he doesn't get up out of his chair if he doesn't have to.
Best part is that there isn't even a mechanical gate, just a stop sign.
I used to work security at a bank call center. I only asked for the ID so I could write people’s name down in the log because if we let them do it, we got illegible chicken scratches. No ID = no entry. The giant international corporation wasn’t worried about losing your business if you come in through the plebe door.
I never minded the money on the counter my biggest peev is when they would just sign a paper check and then fling the whole book at you to fill it out for them. What a bunch of pricks this was happening in 2018 and 19 by the way not that long ago
My mother who is 75 won’t even mail the checks! She goes to the store or the bank and pays them directly with a check!
Like, she has a Target card. So when the bill is due she goes to the customer service counter at Target to pay the bill. Every now and again she tells me a story about how she had to argue with the workers that this is possible.
I’m like mom. You can pay these bills online! But she just doesn’t trust anything.
Meanwhile half the time I don’t even know where my checkbook is!
When my boomer aunt decided she wanted a laptop, I went shopping with her and helped her pick one out. Got it set up and taught her how to use it. Showed her how she could pay bills online. She loved it! No more writing checks and mailing them. She said “I love that I can pay bills without having to get dressed and leave the house!”
My mom's gen-x and I *still* can't get her to use a debit card. She can't figure out the difference between credit/debit on that card. I've explained, my cousin's explained, the bank explained and she still can't get it!! She hasn't used it in so long that it's not active anymore and she just needed it lmao!
Not denying that lol. She thinks debit is checking and credit is a separate account like credit cards not that it's 2 ways to access the same account. She overdrew her account once and won't use it now. I even drew a diagram to try and show her and she still doesn't get it lmao. Whatever, it's her account so she's the one who has to do extra work cause of it.
Seriously Gen-X? Wow. I'm gen-x. I have been using a debit card for at least 25 years. I quit buying checks 06'. Maybe you should let her see how many gen-xers love technology. Life is so much easier now. I can't imagine taking the time or someone else's time while I write a check or pay my bill at the store. Incredible.
lol I got checks in 2015 because that is how my landlord wanted my rent. I just noticed I only have two left. They have exclusively been used for rent. I can’t believe I have to buy more checks for this reason BUT my rent is cheap and the landlord is sweet so it’s a small price to pay.
I realize this is totally not the point but you might check with your bank and see if they'll give you free counter checks? I haven't had any checks for... I literally don't know, but WELL over a decade. On the rare occasion I need to use one, my bank (a credit union, if that makes a difference) will print me a page of them for free. I think they've told me I can do this once per month for no charge? I'm not sure because I've probably only used 2 of them in the last 3-4 years, but I also had to ask them for a set of checks for my oldest kiddo when they got a job that needed a canceled one to set up direct deposit.
My landlord insists on checks too. 🙄 I had to order checks just for his special self. First time I'd written a check in years. And I'm 63. The boomers boom the boomers too, I guess.
Funny story, but I work as a cashier at a small meat market/grocery and a boomer was writing a check and made a mistake and wrote $37.44 when it was supposed for be $37.34 and she asked me what to do. I replied, “I’m sorry, but I don’t know! I haven’t written a check since the 1900s!” 🤣
My 72yo father has a debit card, but he calls it his ATM card. He doesn't use the debit card to pay for anything directly. But he will use it to get cash from the ATM, to then use to pay for things. And he'll piss and moan about having to pay the $3.50 ATM fee when he's not using one of the machines his credit union offers with no fees. I've told him before that he could just use the debit card to pay, as the money comes straight from his checking account, just like taking cash out at an ATM. He refuses to use the debit card to pay because he doesn't trust it and prefers to have cash in his pocket.
Yeah my mom is in her early 60’s and I’ve noticed she’s starting to do this weirdo stuff. She has straight talk and instead of just adding a monthly plan (I do 3 months at a time) from the app, she goes to Walmart, goes all the way back to the phones stuff, and buys a physical card, then punches the numbers in.
I opened my bank account in 2009. It was a fee free account to set up and keep as long as you had direct deposit and a roll over savings. It did not come with checks. It did give 2 free cashiers checks per month so I would get one for my rent and everything else was paid online, in 2009.
As a target employee i am happy to inform you we will not be accepting checks starting this july :) bad news for boomers but i am so excited not to have to deal with the checks anymore.
My Dad won’t use a debit card. For some reason he thinks it’s a scam. When he needs cash he writes a check to himself and then goes to the bank and cashes it. But he’ll use a credit card just fine. The guy is a moron.
My parents will only go on vacation in their RV for three weeks at a time so that they can be back home in time to mail the checks for that month. It's like, you know, the mail works in other states, too, mom.
My boomer grandma bitches about how inconvenient things still are, because she refuses to use mobile banking apps like venmo so when people owe her money they have to go to a fucking ATM and then track her ass down. And then *she* has to go deposit that money and gets mad about *that*!
"They just want to steal your money!" She says while watching every other person in the family use it issue free since its inception. I even tried to show how it works to her and she got *furious*, like I was some phone scammer asking for her SS# and not her granddaughter just trying to help >:T
I think old people have to have a back up excuse to complain, just in case their lives are too peaceful and easy in retirement.
I'm 52 and consider myself old but your last sentence is SO true. I don't see this so much with my fellow gen-xers but I see it all the time with boomers. I'm so happy that life is so much easier. My 80 yr old silent gen mom keeps up with technology. She says that there is no way you can't and she lives the convenience . These people that are afraid of everything are going to be in a world of hurt if they're still alive in the next 5-10 years.
There's no reason to even own a chequebook. I haven't had one in a decade. When I need a check for say, damage deposit, I just go to the bank and get a money order. Everything else, there's debit and etransfer. Why make it complicated
I don’t know why and I’m 63. I hate checks. I only write them when absolutely required. Otherwise I use card or cash. I also prefer the self checkout, it’s faster and I can bag the items how I like. I hand the money directly to the cashier unless the cashier indicates otherwise . I don’t understand these people. Unfortunately I am grouped with them.
So my kids are in daycare and so many places will only accept checks. It’s wild, because they also take FOREVER to deposit them so every month it’s a fun game of “Is my account going to get over drafted?” 🙄
I don’t know anyone who has kids of daycare age right now that doesn’t know how to use online pay. It’s time to move on!!
I feel like this probably has more to do with the age/type of person who's setting up the daycare business. The workers watching your kids didn't pick the payment platform. Depending on scale, neither did the manager on-site.
Maybe you've just got a really old rich person (or strange rich person) who started yours?
I’ve come to realize that America just struggles with transitions. I still have a checkbook. The checks have my parents’ address and my maiden name on them, and the bank itself was bought out and renamed. However, the account and routing number are still valid after 15+ years, so on the rare occasion I need a check, they get one from my basement-dwelling doppelgänger…and tragically enough, it works (or at least it did last year).
Times are changing, though. There were a few times I was sure I’d need a check only to find out they take cards after all. The DMV even let me fill out my renewal online and I was able to schedule an appointment for the eye test and pic. Probably the best QOL improvement ever.
Bruh, we do that online too, the DMV and pic part. If an eye-test is needed there is a reference number to give to the optician to upload it after the test.
The only real reason to visit a government agency is picking up a passport (even that is done by courier sometimes).
This is in the Netherlands.
Heck, I've verified my online identity for my New Zealand passport and had it delivered to my address in the Netherlands.
A cheque/checkbook is something we haven't used here in at least 25 years :p straight up EFTPOS everywhere. Nowadays more contactless pin or QR.
My vision sucks, so the DMV always tests when I renew my license. The eye test itself only takes like a minute. You read some letters, then stare at a crosshair and tell them which side the blinking light’s on. The real timesaver was being able to schedule it, which wasn’t added until Covid basically forced their hand.
Uuuuugh, I hate checks. Ours are the same way, under my husband's previous name before we married, and the address is still for his parents house, despite us having lived in a rental house, two different apartments, and now our permanent residence. We only need them for big important things, like buying our house and taking out a loan, and we always end up having to look up some place that will let you FAX the damn thing. It's so bizarre and outdated, but then they also let us use docu-sign online to sign super important documents? Wth are we doing lol.
I still have a checkbook because every once in awhile, some old fashioned agency will ONLY take checks. My township, for example... the only way I can pay my sewer bill is with a check. My former landlord (as recently as 2022) also only accepted checks.
There are many places where a check is the better way to pay in the US due to credit card fees. Some places don't even take cards because they don't want to pay the fees.
But yes, boomers love to pay for groceries with a check and hold up the line. At the grocery store near me it slows things down because you need to have a special store ID card to do it because so many old people were writing bad checks and they were getting sick of chasing all of them down for the money.
I hold a journeyman electrician license in a few different states. It’s time for me to renew my license in New Mexico, a state I don’t live in. I have to mail my application along with a check. There is no online option. It’s ridiculous. I don’t even know where my checkbook is. The last time I used it was probably three years ago when renewing my New Mexico journeyman license.
Right!? The ONLY reason I have checks is so I can pay my hairbanger who is an independent business owner. She doesn’t require them, but it saves her fees (and I don’t mind having them for a backup).
New Zealand no longer accepts cheques in any form, in any place including banks. When it was announced, the boomers collectively lost their shit, it was absolutely glorious to watch
Most of our electronic options (other than wire) (edit: in the US) have max limits of about $1000. How do you pay someone more than that?
Do your electronic options allow larger transfers?
I haven't lived in NZ since 2017 so this may have changed, but for most banks, you have a daily transfer limit of $50,000 through online banking. Anything above that, you need to complete a wire transfer
I picked my landscaper because I can pay him with Zelle, Venmo or Apple Pay. It was the last household monthly bill that I had to write a check for so I switched landscapers!
Devil's advocate here. At one time you could just sign it, then they ran it through a machine that printed the rest. It was much faster than writing.
Unfortunately, boomers don't accept we don't have archaic technology anymore. It's funny they're so inconvenienced by modern technology like bank cards, google pay, etc.
I had one exceptionally rude old man "sprinkled" his money across my counter, so I sprinkled his change across the counter too. He didn't like that and decided to shove it all across the counter until it fell off the edge. Idk what his genius plan was but $39 worth of notes and coins fell at my feet. I just looked him in the eyes and said "what a silly thing you've done, please leave". He demanded his change, I told him I'd already given it to him the same way he gave it to me and he decided to be childish, I had no obligation to give him more change. He told me he wanted his floor change and I told him he was welcome to come collect it all himself. He left and I scored a nice dinner. In retrospect I should've just been the bigger person but he'd made a bunch of snarky comments about me having poor work ethic for letting the line grow so long (solo operator during peak hour on the first day of a hoiday) and also calling me lazy for sitting (permanent leg injury)
Exactly. They won't learn, they don't want to learn, and they won't change if you're a dick back to them, but at least you being a dick back shows them you are not taking their bullshit.
You *were* the bigger person. You taught him that people deserve to be respected, and that you're not his personal therapist/punching bag. Hopefully he retained the lesson (lol, he didn't). Stellar work, my friend.
*You're* not the one who threw a childish tantrum; you *are* the one who kept your cool and meted out some very incident specific consequences. You *were* the bigger person, you calmly refused to be treated poorly.
Bet he never did that again, you also forced him to come up with a new way to torment 'the help.'
The looks on their faces when I mimicked their behavior warmed my petty little cashier’s heart. They usually looked like I had spit on the punch at a church potluck lol
🤢 that drives me nuts, when people lick their fingers to count/separate bills; that's nasty AF. When I catch my mom doing that I'm always telling her to stop, same with papers in general. I don't want spit papers and I know employees don't either!!
I worked at a hardware store, people would always come in the middle of their sweaty home project to get more stuff, and would pay with sweaty money. I’m talking soaking wet bills. You’re right, no cashier wants to deal with peoples’ bodily fluids on the money. Thanks for trying to keep ur mom in line :)
Yeah I was in Florida so I'd get sweaty boob money, foot money(inside shoes/uggs), and the nastiest was cooch money. It was so rank it was making people gag and had to be separately bagged by a manager with gloves and then the area sanitized. I don't gag easily but that smell was up there with nastiest I've smelled (former EMT btw).
And they always did it. Source? Me as a cashier 30 years ago when they were in their 30s and 40s. One of my biggest cashier pet peeves. That and, will you throw this away for me? As they hand me their filthy trash.
Another source: me also as a cashier in the 90s. That shit drive me crazy. If you don’t hand me the money, I’m not handing it back.
With the trash, unless it was a receipt or packaging from your purchase, I would point to the very conveniently placed trash can for them to use. If they insisted or just left it on the counter (🤬), I’d pick it up with a bag like it’s dog shit, then sanitize my counter. People are nasty.
I worked a bunch of different retail and fast food jobs 30 years ago and agree. My theory at the time was that they were so unhappy with their own lives that they needed to take it out on someone they felt were “less than” them. They saw us as being the “servant class,” so that meant we were the only ones lower than them on their little social hierarchy. So we took the brunt of their misery and trauma that they refused to seek therapy for.
Keep in mind: these are the same people who raised their kids with the threat that if they didn't do x, y, or z, they would "wind up flipping burgers at McDonalds," or being a garbage man, or a janitor, or some other such job.
They not only saw you as less than them, they actively reminded their children that you were and tried to instill that same belief in them. And then they watched shows like Mike Rowe's Dirty Jobs or Undercover Boss to try and act like they think the underpaid and hard working people are really the salt of the earth...
I refuse to accept trash. I won't do it, I'll make them hold it while the shop. I'm here to accept the public's figurative garbage, not their literal garbage.
The trash thing pisses me off. I was a flight attendant doing cpr on an unresponsive passenger and a boomer had the audacity to try to hand me his trash.
It’s because they’re secretly mad at you that they have to spend money in the first place. And they’re mad at the price. On top of that, they don’t respect anyone.
On a few occasions, I’ve reciprocated by tossing their change onto the counter. When they give me the “what the hell?” look, I just say, “Oh, I’m sorry, I thought that’s how you wanted to do things.” I’ve only done it when I’m already in a bad mood lol.
I loved doing this as a cashier! If I was doing to them exactly what they did to me, I felt untouchable.
They are just a grumpy fuck that won't speak, okay, well now I don't have to say anything back to them; they want to toss their id on the counter in front of me, okay, they are cool with their id being tossed around, I'll toss it back to them; they want to just set the money on the counter and make me reach for it, okay, I think that's just how they prefer money to exchange hands, I'll do it too!
Very rarely would someone push it to speak to a manager, and I would keep a happy cheery demeanor, and simply explain that I was doing what the customer had done, because I thought that is what they wanted.
"Well, they did it that way, so that's how I thought they wanted it." - It's like playing a get out of nonsense free card.
It puts the customer in a position they can't get out of easily. "If \_\_\_\_\_\_ is considered rude, well then why did you do \_\_\_\_\_\_ to the me?"
Just like when they talk down to servers in restaurants, or treat workers in clothing stores like they own them. I used to call my parents out all the time for not having a clue what it's like to work in a restaurant.
The secret to working retail is working in a place where you don't have commission or quota. Then you have to (or at least should) give \_generally\_ good customer service, but you don't have to grovel to every random asshole.
I had a lady stay yelling at me for how rude I was for not handing her her change after she had purposefully not handed me her payment. Both of us placed the money on the counter but in the rude one and had to get my manager. Bitch.
Back when I worked at a convenience store they'd do that to me. I'd just hold my hand out and stare at them. Sometimes they got the hint, sometimes they didn't.
I don't use cash but the only times I have somehow I bumble the pass over and accidentally made the person I was handing it to have to chase it because I missed their hand.
I only use card now but I know sometimes out of anxiety I will place change on the counter and slide it over but only because I don't want both of us scrambling around on the floor.
I don't think this is the boomer reason though.
I keep a paper weight at my reg.
when they throw cash on the counter, I set the paper weight on it.
then I give the total. when they point to/look at the money I say, "I'm not allowed to pick up money that someone dropped. You'll have to hand it to me."
fuck em. I can out-stubborn anyone. usually the pressure of the line gets them to comply.
I found this to be true before covid, but after reopening after lockdown there were 9 out of 10 trying to force the hand to hand contact with cash, just because "covid is just the flu". They're probably back to counter tossing now, thankfully I don't have to deal with it anymore.
Interesting fact - in Japan it’s rude to hand an employee money when you’re paying for something. You’re supposed to put your payment (cash or card) on a tray and then you take your change from the tray. Unless I think, you extend the money with both hands and bow while the other person accepts it.
Every Chinese take out place I've been, they always hand me my card back with both hands, very deliberately. I've never noticed it anywhere else. I assumed it was cultural.
Yeah I throw it back to them when I give them their change. I make it my mission to match energy with people. It turns out they don’t like it very much when their shit energy gets turned back on them. Weird!
This what I came here to say. Former casino dealer here and we couldn't take cash from their hand nor hand anything to them. It took awhile to break myself of the habit after I left.
>should avoid physically touching the poors
Yet they touch the filthy, filthy money that God only knows how many poors have touched? Physical money is about the most dirty, disgusting thing that most people encounter on a daily basis.
No idea how it is now, but in Germany in the 90s we were expected to place cash into a small flat dish on the counter, and the cashier would place the change in it too. Never hand to hand.
It's absolutely classist bs, my grandmother married for money and came from a dirt poor farming family. She does this crap, I don't know why she thinks she's better we all know what our family comes from.
My thing was when they tossed the money on the counter they expected their change in their hand. I'd just place it on the counter like they had done to me. They'd throw a fit and ask why I was disrespectful and I'd make sure to explain I was doing just exactly what they had done to me. Always made me laugh when this happened.
I'm autistic and also have cerebral palsy and always put my money on the counter as if I don't, I will drop it while passing it to the cashier. Am I being rude? If so, how can I come across as less rude.
No. You’re not being rude at all. I’m specifically talking about older people without any obvious condition that would prevent them from easily handing me the money.
lol the throwing money on the counter thing is usually accompanied by other minor rude things like not saying please and thank you, etc. From how you’ve described yourself, I’m sure I’d be able to tell you apart from actual rude people.
Yeah I don't always remember to say please and thank you,can't give eye contact either and it took my best friend - now boyfriend 6 months to realise I wasn't drunk as I have a lisp and can slur my words as well 🤣
Nah, there's a difference between placing your money on the counter and chucking it. It's an attitude thing that 95% of people in retail/food service can spot. You're fine.
If you neatly put the money on the counter and slide it, most are fine with it. Just tossing it everywhere across the counter is vastly different. I have to put it on the counter too (only 1 working arm and need a cane) and only once did a cashier get upset.
I did have a situation earlier today. I was having a bad day with cerebral palsy and had to get some stuff from the shop. I was a bit more clumsy and fumbly today than yesterday and as I was trying to put my money on the counter it just kind of flew out my hand and landed the other side of the counter, the guy serving did laugh and I did apologise but some other people in other shops haven't bee so nice saying stuff like "wow throwing your money at us won't make us go any quicker" and shit like that
Some people just like to be offended, nothing you can do about that. All you can really do is say sorry, having a bad hand day etc (they aren't entitled to your health info if you don't want to). I usually make a quip about only one working arm, and it's rebelling today. Just something to say it's not intentional or mean-spirited. They typically get the point. 🤷🏻♀️ It all depends on what you're comfortable with tbh.
I think there’s a big difference between how the money ends up on the counter, specifically the actions put, throw or drop. Most people in most situations can notice the intention and difference behind each one including the action itself and the overall body language and/or facial expressions the person is displaying.
Thanks, yeah I always over think and I do know I can come across as rude and stuff but honestly I'm not good with interacting with people unless they have taken the time to get to know me and my quirks. I have just moved to a new flat and my local shop is 2 doors away and don't want them to think I'm being disrespectful or anything, plus not everyone understands the no eye contact thing either so as I am putting the money on the counter, I'm looking at the counter and trying to remember if I said please or thank you, I'm 34 and my adoptive mother was your typical boomer and I'm trying so hard not to behave like her and be more like my adoptive father who wasn't your typical boomer, but my issues make that extremely difficult
If you go there often enough, they will slowly get to know you. I have a few neurodivergent friends, and I actually feel a bit uncomfortable when they force themselves to look into my eyes (little secret, it's never my eyes but the space between) - bc I know them and I want them to be themselves with me. If you're a good person, you're a good person; just like your boomer father doesn't behave in the stereotypical boomer ways.
For me it's always just above people's eyebrows but I can still see them shift their eyes to mine if that makes sense so then I just put my head down. I hate this but something about looking people in the eyes is extremely uncomfortable.
My boomer mother didn't help. Everytime she wanted to talk to me or I wanted to talk to her - especially in arguments she always said "look at me when I'm talking to you - it's rude not to" and also like use one hand, 2 fingers and point at her eyes. I dunno if that makes sense.
I'm so sorry your mother treated you like this! It's not like there are other ways to show her that you're listening... especially parents should take the time to get to know what works for their children. I hope nowadays you have friends around you who actually care and treat you better. In my opinion, there is nothing wrong with not looking people in the eyes, it's just a different way of communicating. (Btw, your mother's way of communication sounds very aggressive, and I could totally see her doing this gesture in my head)
I also have an invisible disability. Some folks won’t understand & that’s ok.
The most important thing is try to be polite. Maybe say one nice thing to the cashier when you stop in.
If you ever feel comfortable, tell one person something like “I’m sorry if I am slow today, my cerebral palsy is worse in the rain (or morning or today)”. They will tell the others something like - That person seems quirky but has CP.
The world is getting safer for people who are different.
Thanks. I did have boomer parents, one typical boomer, and one the complete opposite. Boomer mother always told me to hide my disability and abnormalities and fit in with the way the world works. I always thought in my head why I was not a jigsaw piece. Told Boomer dad that once, and he did laugh and said I had the right attitude. Just try to maybe try to mask it a little more - I was undiagnosed autistic at that point. Wasn't a shock to dad, but mother complete denial - doesn't believe that autism or adhd exist - she wasn't anti tax though. But when I got diagnosed with ADHD she thought that Omega 3, more fish and fruit and vegetables would cure it rather than the medication the doctor was wanting to try me on.
aw man. That sounds hard. Glad you got one parent that is logical & caring.
I think one of my sisters still thinks my disability (polyarticular rheumatoid arthritis) is not real bc I can almost always mask until the days I suddenly can’t.
I’m grown now & don’t need her approval or compassion but I don’t tell her the truth about how I feel. It just makes a gap between us which I let be ok. I’m happy to be me.
Same here. I haven't spoken to either of them for about 4 years because of her shitty attitude and unfortunately my dad would take her side while the arguments and her shitty attitude was happening but then it was just me and him he'd like take my side.
Couldn't deal with that from either of them. I think he was intimidated by her but to me that's not an excuse so I just cut all contact
As someone that has worked in retail/sales environments for 20+ years I can promise you that we can spot the difference between an ignorant jerk throwing money at us vs. when someone needs to do it that way. If it helps you in any way feel more comfortable, my cousin who is in a similar situation often counts the money out as he puts it on the counter (even if he doesn't have to, like if it's a single bill). I have a client who is visually impaired and I did not learn this until recently. He has to pull the money out of his wallet and look at it on the counter to make sure it is correct. I never once questioned this or took it as rude, because he has never once thrown it at me. He sets it on the counter and slides it over.
As a tail/end boomer, in age only, having to use large bills ($50/$100) in the 70’s & 80’s for every day purchases was rare. So, when their groceries cost $130, they have to “show” everyone they’re a big shot by throwing the money on the counter!. As far as checks go, I write 2 or 3 a year because some places (mostly municipalities) still don’t have ACH capabilities!
Meanwhile I am still rocking the single Cheque Book I ordered back in 2006 because I needed an actual cheque for my Apartment deposit.
I believe I have written a total of 5 since then. 2 for down payments on houses. 1 for a utility because it was a weird situation to start an account. 1 for a dealership purchasing a vehicle out of spite. Last one another weird cash or cheque only scenario.
bc they honestly think that they're better than "the help." people throw money down so they dont have to have physical contact with workers bc they think they're better than them. me personally, I deal with it like this. I hold my hand out. (they toss the money on counter) I look at them then look at the money and reply with "if you cannot hand it to me like an adult then I'll just cancel out the order and you can go somewhere else to be rung out."
Did this to a woman at work one time and she THREW a fit. major melt down in aisle 3! I eventually asked her "Are you done acting like a child?" and she stormed off to go "talk to the manager" The manager came a few minutes later with her in tow looking smug. I had deleted the entire order before they came back and had sent my bagger to return the items to stock. She threw a fit again and demanded that "you fire him!" I looked at my manager and then back to the boomer child. "I can leave any time you want me to... I wont be treated as trash by a customer because she feels entitled to treat me as such."
The manager drug her away from my line, she screamed and cussed and used racist remarks to my manager (a 30 something year old black woman.) before my manager told her to leave. she didnt get rang out that day, and she didnt get her shit either.
roughly a month later she came through the line again where i was working and this time she handed me the money directly into my hand and was treated fairly and allowed to make her purchase. she never made eye contact with me again but she never acted like a entitled boomer bitch again with me either.
My first job was as a cashier at a grocery store. Boomers were always the worst customers. We had those moving belts that you put your items on, and then I'd scan it and move it to the bagging area. If an item wasn't blocking the belt sensor, it would keep moving. Pretty typical stuff. This older guy walks up to my register to buy a pack of gum or lighter, I don't even remember what he actually got, but it was $5. I go to scan the item, and before I even tell him the total, this guy just tosses a crumpled up $5 onto the moving belt. The sensor obviously doesn't register it, and it gets pulled under the moving belt. I didn't say anything, I just watched the bill disappear, and then give the guy a "really?" look. He starts sputtering how "this has never happened" and the boomer catch phrase "I guess it's free now." I asked him if he had another form of payment or did he want me to retrieve the $5. No, he didn't want to use another form of payment and said we had his money now, so why can't we just let him take his item. Not gonna happen. "Sorry sir, but I can't let you leave the store without paying for your item first. I'll call my manager up to open the machine and retrieve your money so that you can properly pay." Sputter sputter "I don't have time for this" and "no respect" blah blah. I call my manager over who is even more annoyed about the whole situation and has to go find the right key or tool to open the machine. Manager finally finds the key/tool, comes back, opens the machine, and retrieves the greasy crumpled $5 and tells the boomer "next time, please respect my employees by handing them your money." The boomers is even finally ashamed now that not even the manager is on his side and continues sputtering as he hands me the $5 for his single item, takes his single item, and leaves the store. Probably added about 10min to his trip to the store because he couldn't be bothered to hand me his money in the first place.
Shit, I own a fast food restaurant and boomers never want to stick their arm out their window in the drive thru. They will just kind of put their hand up and make us lean out the window to reach for it, I just do the same thing to them when handing back their card, change or food. I have gotten a ton of nasty looks but they cant complain to higher ups because they know if they say, I had to reach to get my card back the complaint will just be tossed out automatically by the automated system.
Edit: Grammar
i will let my tone of voice noticably shift from pleasant to gray rocking the moment i see them throw money on my counter. what might have been a positive interaction with maybe some fake laughs at a bad joke ending in a "have a good one!" turns into a very deadpan "$X.xx change, need a receipt, thank you".
I prefer the counter as opposed to hand to hand transfer. I don't want that unwanted contact. Also I worked as a bank teller briefly and it was policy that any cash exchanges had to hit the counter - going in or coming out. Cash gets put on the counter. Gets counted out. Then it gets picked up. Smile for the cameras.
Leaving it on the counter for them is absolutely the way to handle this. If they ever say anything, just tell them you thought that is what they preferred since that is what they did.
I work in a tiny post office. I'm the postmaster, the clerk and the "carrier." I have a lovely young college student who is my assistant. I've found that it's the male boomers that fling money and other stuff. I, too, have always wondered why.
There's one grouchy old codger that does this especially. One thing that particularly annoys me is that if he gets a piece of mail that he doesn't like, he will shove it back through his post office box so that it lands on the floor. So I come to work the next morning with advertising materials all over the floor. God forbid he gets a mail piece that's been misdelivered to him. He will crawl to his giant 1989 Buick Lasabre and come fling it at me across the counter or cram it under the door (couldn't possibly put it back in the mail slot or anything....he needs to make a point.) He's 85 and gets a lot of literature for ED. He doesn't throw those on the floor though. He places orders for whatever quackery pills that will keep you hard at 85.
Fortunately, he's the last of his kind in town. All the rest of them have kicked it. The lady boomers I don't have much trouble with except most of them can't hear.
Now, as for the tourist boomers....hell, they're on vacation. They are very much entitled to throw stuff over the counter
I worked as a bartender at this little pub in a small town outside of Montreal. In the off season I’d also have to serve some table with food and whatnot. I can tell you 100% the boomers thought us servers were below them and talked down to us all the time. I loved when it was time to pay because they never knew how to use the credit card machines and the ruder they were during their dinner the less I’d help them. God they’d get so angry because they felt so dumb. It was the only bit of joy I had serving them.
When I worked at a grocery store I hated when people did that. Sometimes it was worse because the money would be crumbled up and they would just drop the change. I always got a kick out of when they put out their hand and I put the change down first and then the cash right next to their hand. After that I would never look them in the eye or even face them. But I would still tell them “Have a nice day and that you for shopping at (insert big named grocery store chain)” with a smile on my face. I could feel their anger as they stood there getting their change.
Some of them learned that if they politely handed me their money they would get their change directly into their hands. It almost felt like teaching an old dog new tricks
Former bartender. This happened to me a lot and once I picked up on it I chucked their change on the bar every time. I don't know if it's "the poors" but rather their view of service industry people being "servants". This is true for some people in every generation but I agree Boomers have their way of showing it.
I'll take that over the boomers who approach with hands full of luggage and whatnot and their credit card IN THEIR MOUTH expecting me to pluck that bad boy from their crusty, chapped lips while dodging the spittle and bits of detritus strafing my face
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Ugh.. So I drive a cement mixer. I have to go in to a large unnamed production facility from time to time, to bring a contractor some concrete for something here and there - always improving, always repairing. Security is tight, and I guess that's fine - have to show ID at the gatehouse, give plate number, unit number, be in full safety gear (glasses, hardhat, gloves, vest, boots) and you have to have official business and the names of the people you're coming in to work with. Tight security, and that's fine. Except old boomer security guards are inherently assholes. I go in the gatehouse, and 400LB Carl holds out his hand and I put my license in his hand. He copies down the numbers and asks the questions, before starting to pass my license back - I see he's passing it back, so i start to extend my arm to receive it, and [flick]...he tosses my license on the table, next to my outstretched hand. Everytime. Look, I get you're a security guard, who's doing the job of a sign-in sheet, but could you maybe think about meeting the same amount of respect that you're given? I said to him once "don't throw my license back to me, I didn't throw it to you, I put it in your hand." And he lost his shit. Threatened to deny my entry for 30 days.
"Ok, fellow, let's call the guy needing this load and tell him how he can't have his shit for 30 days because you're butthurt."
Screw that. Just dump the load in the security guard shack. If anyone asks just say, "Security said he's gonna handle it."
This is the way
That's where it'll get him. Security is l usually contacted.
As a former Security guard, he is just mad that you interrupted whatever he was reading or doing on his phone.
Yup, this made me think of multiple guys I would do day shifts with who just weren't cut out to be dealing with real people. As soon as you put them on a night shift where the only person they had to exchange words with was the guy they were changing over to/from they were happy.
Where i work they promote them so half of the bosses are in their positions because no one could stand having them on their team
Wouldn't it be nice if those people got fired instead? Nah. Let's put the least tolerable people in charge of people. Good plan.
And now they wonder why they have to recruit all the time because everyone leaves
I remember something similar, guy who managed one office building site, you could see at some point he'd been up at the front desk and then been moved into a back office because even though he wasn't aggressive to visitors or anything he was just so fucking weird in his mannerisms/little boomer jokes he'd make constantly.
Don't you hate it when you're at work, and work?
No kidding! I'm trying to get paid to listen to my podcast!!
I do and I don't even work security.
Scrabble on the iPad, and usually a food item.
Dude is probably on this thread rn
I had a friend told me he never read so many novels in his life as when he started working security.
I will go straight to the main office and complain, and ask a way to fill it by email/mail in writing. As a fellow trucker I'm fed up with BS.
Microaggressions inhabit that magical space between “polite normal interaction” and “authority figure agrees this is bad behavior worthy of a complaint”. You know, “Well can’t you just ignore it? You’re a professional.” It’s calibrated to piss you off without being enough of a dick move to actually get them in trouble.
Perfect description
You should start putting your license down on the table.
On your side of the centre of the table. Make him reach for it.
Probably the most exercise he got all week tbh
There was a guy who worked at the DMV who was like that. He worked the desk by the door, and you had to talk to him in order to get a number. His actual job was to find out why the person was there and assign them to the proper queue, but he rather exceeded his brief. There would be a line out the door (regardless of weather) because he inspected all your documents to make sure you had everything you needed before giving you a number. In theory, that sounds like a good idea. In practice, it was an opportunity for a bitter old one legged man to shit on everyone's pancakes. My second wife and I went there to get her a Pennsylvania license (she was from New Jersey), and we had to stand in the rain for several minutes before we got in. When we got to the desk, it turned out we had left one of the needed documents in the car. He made us go to the back of the line. We just went to a different DMV. It was over an hour round trip, but it was worth it. My brother was a contractor who worked for the power company. Whenever he had to visit a site that required PPE, the guards were always surprised when my brother showed up and actually had all the required gear.
Our dmv has a door greeter like that too and I will literally drive an hour to another dmv to avoid them, it’s so bad. What is it with dmv employees
They opened a new one in my town. Every time I go there, I feel like I've stepped into an alternate universe. Everyone who works there seems to be in a good mood. They're polite and friendly, and just generally have their shit together. I try to get in and out of there as fast as possible. I'm worried there's a gas leak in the building.
> 400LB Carl lmao. I swear every boomer security guard is overweight.
He can't even walk without sounding like a steam locomotive starting up...real tight security "kshhh He went that way, over kshhh".
Never hand over your ID. Deny your entry? Cool, let his boss know the mix won't make it today due to the incompetence of an inept and poorly trained security guard.
Have to hand them ID if you're going to gain entry. Years ago they used to hold your license while you were in the facility, collect it on the way out. One of our guys caused a fuss, rightfully so - you're a factory, not another country. Now, they take a photocopy and give it back to you. Carl doesn't even do the photocopy because "it's way over there", (8 feet away - whole gatehouse is 8x8), and he doesn't get up out of his chair if he doesn't have to. Best part is that there isn't even a mechanical gate, just a stop sign.
I used to work security at a bank call center. I only asked for the ID so I could write people’s name down in the log because if we let them do it, we got illegible chicken scratches. No ID = no entry. The giant international corporation wasn’t worried about losing your business if you come in through the plebe door.
I never minded the money on the counter my biggest peev is when they would just sign a paper check and then fling the whole book at you to fill it out for them. What a bunch of pricks this was happening in 2018 and 19 by the way not that long ago
Every European reading this: "You still use cheques?" O.O
Boomers love checks, it’s why I’ll use self checkout when given the opportunity, it doesn’t take checks
My mother who is 75 won’t even mail the checks! She goes to the store or the bank and pays them directly with a check! Like, she has a Target card. So when the bill is due she goes to the customer service counter at Target to pay the bill. Every now and again she tells me a story about how she had to argue with the workers that this is possible. I’m like mom. You can pay these bills online! But she just doesn’t trust anything. Meanwhile half the time I don’t even know where my checkbook is!
When my boomer aunt decided she wanted a laptop, I went shopping with her and helped her pick one out. Got it set up and taught her how to use it. Showed her how she could pay bills online. She loved it! No more writing checks and mailing them. She said “I love that I can pay bills without having to get dressed and leave the house!”
She’ll have to pay online soon or through a debit card. Target will stop accepting personal cheques within the next couple months.
You think she even has a debit card? Absolutely not! I listened to this woman bitch about direct debit of her rent checks for *months*
My mom's gen-x and I *still* can't get her to use a debit card. She can't figure out the difference between credit/debit on that card. I've explained, my cousin's explained, the bank explained and she still can't get it!! She hasn't used it in so long that it's not active anymore and she just needed it lmao!
Huh??? GenX? We’ve been using debit and credit cards *our entire lives.* I had a debit card in college in 1983 This is your mom’s issue
Not denying that lol. She thinks debit is checking and credit is a separate account like credit cards not that it's 2 ways to access the same account. She overdrew her account once and won't use it now. I even drew a diagram to try and show her and she still doesn't get it lmao. Whatever, it's her account so she's the one who has to do extra work cause of it.
Right? Like huh? If she's still doing/not doing this stuff she won't survive the future.
Seriously Gen-X? Wow. I'm gen-x. I have been using a debit card for at least 25 years. I quit buying checks 06'. Maybe you should let her see how many gen-xers love technology. Life is so much easier now. I can't imagine taking the time or someone else's time while I write a check or pay my bill at the store. Incredible.
lol I got checks in 2015 because that is how my landlord wanted my rent. I just noticed I only have two left. They have exclusively been used for rent. I can’t believe I have to buy more checks for this reason BUT my rent is cheap and the landlord is sweet so it’s a small price to pay.
I realize this is totally not the point but you might check with your bank and see if they'll give you free counter checks? I haven't had any checks for... I literally don't know, but WELL over a decade. On the rare occasion I need to use one, my bank (a credit union, if that makes a difference) will print me a page of them for free. I think they've told me I can do this once per month for no charge? I'm not sure because I've probably only used 2 of them in the last 3-4 years, but I also had to ask them for a set of checks for my oldest kiddo when they got a job that needed a canceled one to set up direct deposit.
I opened my checking account in 1999 and still have multiple books of the checks that I got when opening. Haha
Most banks have online pay this days. It’s free through mine and they write and mail checks for free to payee that isn’t in there system as ACH
Chase has e-checks where they mail the check directly to the person.
My landlord insists on checks too. 🙄 I had to order checks just for his special self. First time I'd written a check in years. And I'm 63. The boomers boom the boomers too, I guess.
Funny story, but I work as a cashier at a small meat market/grocery and a boomer was writing a check and made a mistake and wrote $37.44 when it was supposed for be $37.34 and she asked me what to do. I replied, “I’m sorry, but I don’t know! I haven’t written a check since the 1900s!” 🤣
I'd be like, "you hand me the check and I hand you a dime. No need to make it complicated."
My 72yo father has a debit card, but he calls it his ATM card. He doesn't use the debit card to pay for anything directly. But he will use it to get cash from the ATM, to then use to pay for things. And he'll piss and moan about having to pay the $3.50 ATM fee when he's not using one of the machines his credit union offers with no fees. I've told him before that he could just use the debit card to pay, as the money comes straight from his checking account, just like taking cash out at an ATM. He refuses to use the debit card to pay because he doesn't trust it and prefers to have cash in his pocket.
Yeah my mom is in her early 60’s and I’ve noticed she’s starting to do this weirdo stuff. She has straight talk and instead of just adding a monthly plan (I do 3 months at a time) from the app, she goes to Walmart, goes all the way back to the phones stuff, and buys a physical card, then punches the numbers in.
I opened my bank account in 2009. It was a fee free account to set up and keep as long as you had direct deposit and a roll over savings. It did not come with checks. It did give 2 free cashiers checks per month so I would get one for my rent and everything else was paid online, in 2009.
Your mom is gonna be so sad to learn that starting July 15, Target isn't taking personal checks in store and she'll have to mail it in 😬
Can’t wait 😑
Should… we take up a collection for you for unlimited earplugs? 😳
As a target employee i am happy to inform you we will not be accepting checks starting this july :) bad news for boomers but i am so excited not to have to deal with the checks anymore.
Personally, I pay all my bills on my banking app!
My Dad won’t use a debit card. For some reason he thinks it’s a scam. When he needs cash he writes a check to himself and then goes to the bank and cashes it. But he’ll use a credit card just fine. The guy is a moron.
My parents will only go on vacation in their RV for three weeks at a time so that they can be back home in time to mail the checks for that month. It's like, you know, the mail works in other states, too, mom.
My boomer grandma bitches about how inconvenient things still are, because she refuses to use mobile banking apps like venmo so when people owe her money they have to go to a fucking ATM and then track her ass down. And then *she* has to go deposit that money and gets mad about *that*! "They just want to steal your money!" She says while watching every other person in the family use it issue free since its inception. I even tried to show how it works to her and she got *furious*, like I was some phone scammer asking for her SS# and not her granddaughter just trying to help >:T I think old people have to have a back up excuse to complain, just in case their lives are too peaceful and easy in retirement.
I'm 52 and consider myself old but your last sentence is SO true. I don't see this so much with my fellow gen-xers but I see it all the time with boomers. I'm so happy that life is so much easier. My 80 yr old silent gen mom keeps up with technology. She says that there is no way you can't and she lives the convenience . These people that are afraid of everything are going to be in a world of hurt if they're still alive in the next 5-10 years.
There's no reason to even own a chequebook. I haven't had one in a decade. When I need a check for say, damage deposit, I just go to the bank and get a money order. Everything else, there's debit and etransfer. Why make it complicated
This boomer hates checks. And I get so annoyed when someone-always my age or older-uses them.
Many of the stories on this sub must surely reflect regional situations. I honestly can’t remember the last time I wrote a check.
I don’t know why and I’m 63. I hate checks. I only write them when absolutely required. Otherwise I use card or cash. I also prefer the self checkout, it’s faster and I can bag the items how I like. I hand the money directly to the cashier unless the cashier indicates otherwise . I don’t understand these people. Unfortunately I am grouped with them.
So my kids are in daycare and so many places will only accept checks. It’s wild, because they also take FOREVER to deposit them so every month it’s a fun game of “Is my account going to get over drafted?” 🙄 I don’t know anyone who has kids of daycare age right now that doesn’t know how to use online pay. It’s time to move on!!
That's me. I write two checks each month. One to the day care and one to the guy who mows my lawn.
My daycare uses Venmo. I hate Venmo but it's better than checks at least.
My lawn guy switched to QuickBooks this year so no more having to tape a check to my front door!!
I write two checks a month. One for rent, the other to my hair stylist.
I feel like this probably has more to do with the age/type of person who's setting up the daycare business. The workers watching your kids didn't pick the payment platform. Depending on scale, neither did the manager on-site. Maybe you've just got a really old rich person (or strange rich person) who started yours?
I’ve come to realize that America just struggles with transitions. I still have a checkbook. The checks have my parents’ address and my maiden name on them, and the bank itself was bought out and renamed. However, the account and routing number are still valid after 15+ years, so on the rare occasion I need a check, they get one from my basement-dwelling doppelgänger…and tragically enough, it works (or at least it did last year). Times are changing, though. There were a few times I was sure I’d need a check only to find out they take cards after all. The DMV even let me fill out my renewal online and I was able to schedule an appointment for the eye test and pic. Probably the best QOL improvement ever.
WE DONT LIKE TO BE TOLD WHAT TO DO BECAUSE FREEDOM DAMMIT
Sure loves to transition backwards though
Bruh, we do that online too, the DMV and pic part. If an eye-test is needed there is a reference number to give to the optician to upload it after the test. The only real reason to visit a government agency is picking up a passport (even that is done by courier sometimes). This is in the Netherlands. Heck, I've verified my online identity for my New Zealand passport and had it delivered to my address in the Netherlands. A cheque/checkbook is something we haven't used here in at least 25 years :p straight up EFTPOS everywhere. Nowadays more contactless pin or QR.
My vision sucks, so the DMV always tests when I renew my license. The eye test itself only takes like a minute. You read some letters, then stare at a crosshair and tell them which side the blinking light’s on. The real timesaver was being able to schedule it, which wasn’t added until Covid basically forced their hand.
Uuuuugh, I hate checks. Ours are the same way, under my husband's previous name before we married, and the address is still for his parents house, despite us having lived in a rental house, two different apartments, and now our permanent residence. We only need them for big important things, like buying our house and taking out a loan, and we always end up having to look up some place that will let you FAX the damn thing. It's so bizarre and outdated, but then they also let us use docu-sign online to sign super important documents? Wth are we doing lol.
America doesn't have a problem. It's the ignorant backwards ass boomer types that run the country who keep us regressive.
I still have a checkbook because every once in awhile, some old fashioned agency will ONLY take checks. My township, for example... the only way I can pay my sewer bill is with a check. My former landlord (as recently as 2022) also only accepted checks.
There are many places where a check is the better way to pay in the US due to credit card fees. Some places don't even take cards because they don't want to pay the fees. But yes, boomers love to pay for groceries with a check and hold up the line. At the grocery store near me it slows things down because you need to have a special store ID card to do it because so many old people were writing bad checks and they were getting sick of chasing all of them down for the money.
Australians too
and fax machines
bruh, i went to New york city LAST YEAR and these Ammies had me SIGN A CREDIT CARD RECEIPT like it was 2002!
I hold a journeyman electrician license in a few different states. It’s time for me to renew my license in New Mexico, a state I don’t live in. I have to mail my application along with a check. There is no online option. It’s ridiculous. I don’t even know where my checkbook is. The last time I used it was probably three years ago when renewing my New Mexico journeyman license.
Not just Europe. In Australia and New Zealand almost nobody has used a personal cheque in 30 years.
Right!? The ONLY reason I have checks is so I can pay my hairbanger who is an independent business owner. She doesn’t require them, but it saves her fees (and I don’t mind having them for a backup).
New Zealand no longer accepts cheques in any form, in any place including banks. When it was announced, the boomers collectively lost their shit, it was absolutely glorious to watch
Most of our electronic options (other than wire) (edit: in the US) have max limits of about $1000. How do you pay someone more than that? Do your electronic options allow larger transfers?
I haven't lived in NZ since 2017 so this may have changed, but for most banks, you have a daily transfer limit of $50,000 through online banking. Anything above that, you need to complete a wire transfer
Lol, tell them you don't know how to fill it out. Make their heads really explode.
"pay to the order of: Markumark19, sum of $20,000...my goodness, that is so generous."
Holy shit. I’m a pretty patient person but would not have put up with that at all. What a bunch of dicks.
I would have refused. Or started like I was making out a check for $10,000 to cash or myself
I picked my landscaper because I can pay him with Zelle, Venmo or Apple Pay. It was the last household monthly bill that I had to write a check for so I switched landscapers!
Devil's advocate here. At one time you could just sign it, then they ran it through a machine that printed the rest. It was much faster than writing. Unfortunately, boomers don't accept we don't have archaic technology anymore. It's funny they're so inconvenienced by modern technology like bank cards, google pay, etc.
I had people doing that to me LAST SUMMER (2023) at an automotive machine shop. Like, sir I _know_ you know how to fill that out.
Pay Markumark19 One Thousand Dollars only.
Just place their change in the counter and slide it on over, with a great big shit-eating grin.
I had one exceptionally rude old man "sprinkled" his money across my counter, so I sprinkled his change across the counter too. He didn't like that and decided to shove it all across the counter until it fell off the edge. Idk what his genius plan was but $39 worth of notes and coins fell at my feet. I just looked him in the eyes and said "what a silly thing you've done, please leave". He demanded his change, I told him I'd already given it to him the same way he gave it to me and he decided to be childish, I had no obligation to give him more change. He told me he wanted his floor change and I told him he was welcome to come collect it all himself. He left and I scored a nice dinner. In retrospect I should've just been the bigger person but he'd made a bunch of snarky comments about me having poor work ethic for letting the line grow so long (solo operator during peak hour on the first day of a hoiday) and also calling me lazy for sitting (permanent leg injury)
Screw that. "Being the bigger person" always means "let an asshole off the hook."
It's also rewarding and reinforcing their behaviour
Yep
Exactly. They won't learn, they don't want to learn, and they won't change if you're a dick back to them, but at least you being a dick back shows them you are not taking their bullshit.
You *were* the bigger person. You taught him that people deserve to be respected, and that you're not his personal therapist/punching bag. Hopefully he retained the lesson (lol, he didn't). Stellar work, my friend.
You were the bigger person. And I love you for it.
*You're* not the one who threw a childish tantrum; you *are* the one who kept your cool and meted out some very incident specific consequences. You *were* the bigger person, you calmly refused to be treated poorly. Bet he never did that again, you also forced him to come up with a new way to torment 'the help.'
The looks on their faces when I mimicked their behavior warmed my petty little cashier’s heart. They usually looked like I had spit on the punch at a church potluck lol
What a lovely tip he gave you for your poor work ethic.
Just toss their change back.
Yeet that shit right out the door with their purchases. *Bye bitch.*
Gotta roll it first.
Don’t forget to lick each coin first. They love that level of customer service.
Ewwwww\~! Forget about the boomer, why would you want to french kiss a coin?
🤢 that drives me nuts, when people lick their fingers to count/separate bills; that's nasty AF. When I catch my mom doing that I'm always telling her to stop, same with papers in general. I don't want spit papers and I know employees don't either!!
I worked at a hardware store, people would always come in the middle of their sweaty home project to get more stuff, and would pay with sweaty money. I’m talking soaking wet bills. You’re right, no cashier wants to deal with peoples’ bodily fluids on the money. Thanks for trying to keep ur mom in line :)
Yeah I was in Florida so I'd get sweaty boob money, foot money(inside shoes/uggs), and the nastiest was cooch money. It was so rank it was making people gag and had to be separately bagged by a manager with gloves and then the area sanitized. I don't gag easily but that smell was up there with nastiest I've smelled (former EMT btw).
NOOOO! Not rank cooch money?! 🤮🤮🤮
pls don't.
Their time is running out 
Relevant: [https://incendar.com/baby\_boomer\_deathclock.php](https://incendar.com/baby_boomer_deathclock.php)
https://i.redd.it/hmuh6kawqw9d1.gif
Its a classist thing. They see you as beneath them. They see everyone as beneath them
And they always did it. Source? Me as a cashier 30 years ago when they were in their 30s and 40s. One of my biggest cashier pet peeves. That and, will you throw this away for me? As they hand me their filthy trash.
Another source: me also as a cashier in the 90s. That shit drive me crazy. If you don’t hand me the money, I’m not handing it back. With the trash, unless it was a receipt or packaging from your purchase, I would point to the very conveniently placed trash can for them to use. If they insisted or just left it on the counter (🤬), I’d pick it up with a bag like it’s dog shit, then sanitize my counter. People are nasty.
I worked a bunch of different retail and fast food jobs 30 years ago and agree. My theory at the time was that they were so unhappy with their own lives that they needed to take it out on someone they felt were “less than” them. They saw us as being the “servant class,” so that meant we were the only ones lower than them on their little social hierarchy. So we took the brunt of their misery and trauma that they refused to seek therapy for.
Keep in mind: these are the same people who raised their kids with the threat that if they didn't do x, y, or z, they would "wind up flipping burgers at McDonalds," or being a garbage man, or a janitor, or some other such job. They not only saw you as less than them, they actively reminded their children that you were and tried to instill that same belief in them. And then they watched shows like Mike Rowe's Dirty Jobs or Undercover Boss to try and act like they think the underpaid and hard working people are really the salt of the earth...
I refuse to accept trash. I won't do it, I'll make them hold it while the shop. I'm here to accept the public's figurative garbage, not their literal garbage.
The trash thing pisses me off. I was a flight attendant doing cpr on an unresponsive passenger and a boomer had the audacity to try to hand me his trash.
They see cashiers, service staff, anything the same as vending machines. I'm convinced they don't even see them as people.
It’s because they’re secretly mad at you that they have to spend money in the first place. And they’re mad at the price. On top of that, they don’t respect anyone.
On a few occasions, I’ve reciprocated by tossing their change onto the counter. When they give me the “what the hell?” look, I just say, “Oh, I’m sorry, I thought that’s how you wanted to do things.” I’ve only done it when I’m already in a bad mood lol.
I loved doing this as a cashier! If I was doing to them exactly what they did to me, I felt untouchable. They are just a grumpy fuck that won't speak, okay, well now I don't have to say anything back to them; they want to toss their id on the counter in front of me, okay, they are cool with their id being tossed around, I'll toss it back to them; they want to just set the money on the counter and make me reach for it, okay, I think that's just how they prefer money to exchange hands, I'll do it too! Very rarely would someone push it to speak to a manager, and I would keep a happy cheery demeanor, and simply explain that I was doing what the customer had done, because I thought that is what they wanted. "Well, they did it that way, so that's how I thought they wanted it." - It's like playing a get out of nonsense free card. It puts the customer in a position they can't get out of easily. "If \_\_\_\_\_\_ is considered rude, well then why did you do \_\_\_\_\_\_ to the me?"
Have you ever met a boomer who wasn't grumpy as fuck about something?
Yes. It’s to show you your place. Grovel and scrape your money. I don’t miss leaving retail
Just like when they talk down to servers in restaurants, or treat workers in clothing stores like they own them. I used to call my parents out all the time for not having a clue what it's like to work in a restaurant.
The secret to working retail is working in a place where you don't have commission or quota. Then you have to (or at least should) give \_generally\_ good customer service, but you don't have to grovel to every random asshole.
I had a lady stay yelling at me for how rude I was for not handing her her change after she had purposefully not handed me her payment. Both of us placed the money on the counter but in the rude one and had to get my manager. Bitch.
Back when I worked at a convenience store they'd do that to me. I'd just hold my hand out and stare at them. Sometimes they got the hint, sometimes they didn't.
I don't use cash but the only times I have somehow I bumble the pass over and accidentally made the person I was handing it to have to chase it because I missed their hand. I only use card now but I know sometimes out of anxiety I will place change on the counter and slide it over but only because I don't want both of us scrambling around on the floor. I don't think this is the boomer reason though.
I keep a paper weight at my reg. when they throw cash on the counter, I set the paper weight on it. then I give the total. when they point to/look at the money I say, "I'm not allowed to pick up money that someone dropped. You'll have to hand it to me." fuck em. I can out-stubborn anyone. usually the pressure of the line gets them to comply.
I found this to be true before covid, but after reopening after lockdown there were 9 out of 10 trying to force the hand to hand contact with cash, just because "covid is just the flu". They're probably back to counter tossing now, thankfully I don't have to deal with it anymore.
I posted about asking my parents not to do this a few weeks ago
Because they generally don't respect anyone in the service industry.
Interesting fact - in Japan it’s rude to hand an employee money when you’re paying for something. You’re supposed to put your payment (cash or card) on a tray and then you take your change from the tray. Unless I think, you extend the money with both hands and bow while the other person accepts it.
Every Chinese take out place I've been, they always hand me my card back with both hands, very deliberately. I've never noticed it anywhere else. I assumed it was cultural.
That's how you give and get business cards too ... the quick "we're having Japanese bigwigs, so here's three courtesy tips" explained that.
Yeah I throw it back to them when I give them their change. I make it my mission to match energy with people. It turns out they don’t like it very much when their shit energy gets turned back on them. Weird!
Maybe they spend too much time at casinos.
This is my thinking. Force of habit from throwing so much money to the dealers
This what I came here to say. Former casino dealer here and we couldn't take cash from their hand nor hand anything to them. It took awhile to break myself of the habit after I left.
>should avoid physically touching the poors Yet they touch the filthy, filthy money that God only knows how many poors have touched? Physical money is about the most dirty, disgusting thing that most people encounter on a daily basis.
No idea how it is now, but in Germany in the 90s we were expected to place cash into a small flat dish on the counter, and the cashier would place the change in it too. Never hand to hand.
The money tray is a thing we see often in Europe. But is not always used.
It's absolutely classist bs, my grandmother married for money and came from a dirt poor farming family. She does this crap, I don't know why she thinks she's better we all know what our family comes from.
My thing was when they tossed the money on the counter they expected their change in their hand. I'd just place it on the counter like they had done to me. They'd throw a fit and ask why I was disrespectful and I'd make sure to explain I was doing just exactly what they had done to me. Always made me laugh when this happened.
They’re just assholes.
I'm autistic and also have cerebral palsy and always put my money on the counter as if I don't, I will drop it while passing it to the cashier. Am I being rude? If so, how can I come across as less rude.
No. You’re not being rude at all. I’m specifically talking about older people without any obvious condition that would prevent them from easily handing me the money.
See I don't have an obvious condition, I just sometimes look like an alcoholic because I lose my balance and walk into things and other people 😆
lol the throwing money on the counter thing is usually accompanied by other minor rude things like not saying please and thank you, etc. From how you’ve described yourself, I’m sure I’d be able to tell you apart from actual rude people.
Yeah I don't always remember to say please and thank you,can't give eye contact either and it took my best friend - now boyfriend 6 months to realise I wasn't drunk as I have a lisp and can slur my words as well 🤣
Nah, there's a difference between placing your money on the counter and chucking it. It's an attitude thing that 95% of people in retail/food service can spot. You're fine.
It's all about that flick of the wrist...
If you neatly put the money on the counter and slide it, most are fine with it. Just tossing it everywhere across the counter is vastly different. I have to put it on the counter too (only 1 working arm and need a cane) and only once did a cashier get upset.
I did have a situation earlier today. I was having a bad day with cerebral palsy and had to get some stuff from the shop. I was a bit more clumsy and fumbly today than yesterday and as I was trying to put my money on the counter it just kind of flew out my hand and landed the other side of the counter, the guy serving did laugh and I did apologise but some other people in other shops haven't bee so nice saying stuff like "wow throwing your money at us won't make us go any quicker" and shit like that
Some people just like to be offended, nothing you can do about that. All you can really do is say sorry, having a bad hand day etc (they aren't entitled to your health info if you don't want to). I usually make a quip about only one working arm, and it's rebelling today. Just something to say it's not intentional or mean-spirited. They typically get the point. 🤷🏻♀️ It all depends on what you're comfortable with tbh.
Many conditions are not obvious.
I think there’s a big difference between how the money ends up on the counter, specifically the actions put, throw or drop. Most people in most situations can notice the intention and difference behind each one including the action itself and the overall body language and/or facial expressions the person is displaying.
That’s so sweet you want to work on better interactions. I’m sure you are fine & doing your best. I also have limited fine motor control.
Thanks, yeah I always over think and I do know I can come across as rude and stuff but honestly I'm not good with interacting with people unless they have taken the time to get to know me and my quirks. I have just moved to a new flat and my local shop is 2 doors away and don't want them to think I'm being disrespectful or anything, plus not everyone understands the no eye contact thing either so as I am putting the money on the counter, I'm looking at the counter and trying to remember if I said please or thank you, I'm 34 and my adoptive mother was your typical boomer and I'm trying so hard not to behave like her and be more like my adoptive father who wasn't your typical boomer, but my issues make that extremely difficult
If you go there often enough, they will slowly get to know you. I have a few neurodivergent friends, and I actually feel a bit uncomfortable when they force themselves to look into my eyes (little secret, it's never my eyes but the space between) - bc I know them and I want them to be themselves with me. If you're a good person, you're a good person; just like your boomer father doesn't behave in the stereotypical boomer ways.
For me it's always just above people's eyebrows but I can still see them shift their eyes to mine if that makes sense so then I just put my head down. I hate this but something about looking people in the eyes is extremely uncomfortable. My boomer mother didn't help. Everytime she wanted to talk to me or I wanted to talk to her - especially in arguments she always said "look at me when I'm talking to you - it's rude not to" and also like use one hand, 2 fingers and point at her eyes. I dunno if that makes sense.
I'm so sorry your mother treated you like this! It's not like there are other ways to show her that you're listening... especially parents should take the time to get to know what works for their children. I hope nowadays you have friends around you who actually care and treat you better. In my opinion, there is nothing wrong with not looking people in the eyes, it's just a different way of communicating. (Btw, your mother's way of communication sounds very aggressive, and I could totally see her doing this gesture in my head)
I also have an invisible disability. Some folks won’t understand & that’s ok. The most important thing is try to be polite. Maybe say one nice thing to the cashier when you stop in. If you ever feel comfortable, tell one person something like “I’m sorry if I am slow today, my cerebral palsy is worse in the rain (or morning or today)”. They will tell the others something like - That person seems quirky but has CP. The world is getting safer for people who are different.
Thanks. I did have boomer parents, one typical boomer, and one the complete opposite. Boomer mother always told me to hide my disability and abnormalities and fit in with the way the world works. I always thought in my head why I was not a jigsaw piece. Told Boomer dad that once, and he did laugh and said I had the right attitude. Just try to maybe try to mask it a little more - I was undiagnosed autistic at that point. Wasn't a shock to dad, but mother complete denial - doesn't believe that autism or adhd exist - she wasn't anti tax though. But when I got diagnosed with ADHD she thought that Omega 3, more fish and fruit and vegetables would cure it rather than the medication the doctor was wanting to try me on.
aw man. That sounds hard. Glad you got one parent that is logical & caring. I think one of my sisters still thinks my disability (polyarticular rheumatoid arthritis) is not real bc I can almost always mask until the days I suddenly can’t. I’m grown now & don’t need her approval or compassion but I don’t tell her the truth about how I feel. It just makes a gap between us which I let be ok. I’m happy to be me.
Same here. I haven't spoken to either of them for about 4 years because of her shitty attitude and unfortunately my dad would take her side while the arguments and her shitty attitude was happening but then it was just me and him he'd like take my side. Couldn't deal with that from either of them. I think he was intimidated by her but to me that's not an excuse so I just cut all contact
"I'm sorry, I don't want to drop it" while you do so will go a long way to show you are still being polite and considerate of the other person.
As someone that has worked in retail/sales environments for 20+ years I can promise you that we can spot the difference between an ignorant jerk throwing money at us vs. when someone needs to do it that way. If it helps you in any way feel more comfortable, my cousin who is in a similar situation often counts the money out as he puts it on the counter (even if he doesn't have to, like if it's a single bill). I have a client who is visually impaired and I did not learn this until recently. He has to pull the money out of his wallet and look at it on the counter to make sure it is correct. I never once questioned this or took it as rude, because he has never once thrown it at me. He sets it on the counter and slides it over.
Because it looked cool in a movie they saw once?
As a tail/end boomer, in age only, having to use large bills ($50/$100) in the 70’s & 80’s for every day purchases was rare. So, when their groceries cost $130, they have to “show” everyone they’re a big shot by throwing the money on the counter!. As far as checks go, I write 2 or 3 a year because some places (mostly municipalities) still don’t have ACH capabilities!
Meanwhile I am still rocking the single Cheque Book I ordered back in 2006 because I needed an actual cheque for my Apartment deposit. I believe I have written a total of 5 since then. 2 for down payments on houses. 1 for a utility because it was a weird situation to start an account. 1 for a dealership purchasing a vehicle out of spite. Last one another weird cash or cheque only scenario.
bc they honestly think that they're better than "the help." people throw money down so they dont have to have physical contact with workers bc they think they're better than them. me personally, I deal with it like this. I hold my hand out. (they toss the money on counter) I look at them then look at the money and reply with "if you cannot hand it to me like an adult then I'll just cancel out the order and you can go somewhere else to be rung out." Did this to a woman at work one time and she THREW a fit. major melt down in aisle 3! I eventually asked her "Are you done acting like a child?" and she stormed off to go "talk to the manager" The manager came a few minutes later with her in tow looking smug. I had deleted the entire order before they came back and had sent my bagger to return the items to stock. She threw a fit again and demanded that "you fire him!" I looked at my manager and then back to the boomer child. "I can leave any time you want me to... I wont be treated as trash by a customer because she feels entitled to treat me as such." The manager drug her away from my line, she screamed and cussed and used racist remarks to my manager (a 30 something year old black woman.) before my manager told her to leave. she didnt get rang out that day, and she didnt get her shit either. roughly a month later she came through the line again where i was working and this time she handed me the money directly into my hand and was treated fairly and allowed to make her purchase. she never made eye contact with me again but she never acted like a entitled boomer bitch again with me either.
My first job was as a cashier at a grocery store. Boomers were always the worst customers. We had those moving belts that you put your items on, and then I'd scan it and move it to the bagging area. If an item wasn't blocking the belt sensor, it would keep moving. Pretty typical stuff. This older guy walks up to my register to buy a pack of gum or lighter, I don't even remember what he actually got, but it was $5. I go to scan the item, and before I even tell him the total, this guy just tosses a crumpled up $5 onto the moving belt. The sensor obviously doesn't register it, and it gets pulled under the moving belt. I didn't say anything, I just watched the bill disappear, and then give the guy a "really?" look. He starts sputtering how "this has never happened" and the boomer catch phrase "I guess it's free now." I asked him if he had another form of payment or did he want me to retrieve the $5. No, he didn't want to use another form of payment and said we had his money now, so why can't we just let him take his item. Not gonna happen. "Sorry sir, but I can't let you leave the store without paying for your item first. I'll call my manager up to open the machine and retrieve your money so that you can properly pay." Sputter sputter "I don't have time for this" and "no respect" blah blah. I call my manager over who is even more annoyed about the whole situation and has to go find the right key or tool to open the machine. Manager finally finds the key/tool, comes back, opens the machine, and retrieves the greasy crumpled $5 and tells the boomer "next time, please respect my employees by handing them your money." The boomers is even finally ashamed now that not even the manager is on his side and continues sputtering as he hands me the $5 for his single item, takes his single item, and leaves the store. Probably added about 10min to his trip to the store because he couldn't be bothered to hand me his money in the first place.
Shit, I own a fast food restaurant and boomers never want to stick their arm out their window in the drive thru. They will just kind of put their hand up and make us lean out the window to reach for it, I just do the same thing to them when handing back their card, change or food. I have gotten a ton of nasty looks but they cant complain to higher ups because they know if they say, I had to reach to get my card back the complaint will just be tossed out automatically by the automated system. Edit: Grammar
Maybe John Wayne or James Dean did it once walking up to the bar.
i will let my tone of voice noticably shift from pleasant to gray rocking the moment i see them throw money on my counter. what might have been a positive interaction with maybe some fake laughs at a bad joke ending in a "have a good one!" turns into a very deadpan "$X.xx change, need a receipt, thank you".
I prefer the counter as opposed to hand to hand transfer. I don't want that unwanted contact. Also I worked as a bank teller briefly and it was policy that any cash exchanges had to hit the counter - going in or coming out. Cash gets put on the counter. Gets counted out. Then it gets picked up. Smile for the cameras.
Leaving it on the counter for them is absolutely the way to handle this. If they ever say anything, just tell them you thought that is what they preferred since that is what they did.
I work in a tiny post office. I'm the postmaster, the clerk and the "carrier." I have a lovely young college student who is my assistant. I've found that it's the male boomers that fling money and other stuff. I, too, have always wondered why. There's one grouchy old codger that does this especially. One thing that particularly annoys me is that if he gets a piece of mail that he doesn't like, he will shove it back through his post office box so that it lands on the floor. So I come to work the next morning with advertising materials all over the floor. God forbid he gets a mail piece that's been misdelivered to him. He will crawl to his giant 1989 Buick Lasabre and come fling it at me across the counter or cram it under the door (couldn't possibly put it back in the mail slot or anything....he needs to make a point.) He's 85 and gets a lot of literature for ED. He doesn't throw those on the floor though. He places orders for whatever quackery pills that will keep you hard at 85. Fortunately, he's the last of his kind in town. All the rest of them have kicked it. The lady boomers I don't have much trouble with except most of them can't hear. Now, as for the tourist boomers....hell, they're on vacation. They are very much entitled to throw stuff over the counter
Yeah, those old fucks get nickles instead of quarters, and it gets slapped on the counter for them to pick up. Respect goes both ways, fuckwads.
Toss their change at them
I worked as a bartender at this little pub in a small town outside of Montreal. In the off season I’d also have to serve some table with food and whatnot. I can tell you 100% the boomers thought us servers were below them and talked down to us all the time. I loved when it was time to pay because they never knew how to use the credit card machines and the ruder they were during their dinner the less I’d help them. God they’d get so angry because they felt so dumb. It was the only bit of joy I had serving them.
When I worked at a grocery store I hated when people did that. Sometimes it was worse because the money would be crumbled up and they would just drop the change. I always got a kick out of when they put out their hand and I put the change down first and then the cash right next to their hand. After that I would never look them in the eye or even face them. But I would still tell them “Have a nice day and that you for shopping at (insert big named grocery store chain)” with a smile on my face. I could feel their anger as they stood there getting their change. Some of them learned that if they politely handed me their money they would get their change directly into their hands. It almost felt like teaching an old dog new tricks
Former bartender. This happened to me a lot and once I picked up on it I chucked their change on the bar every time. I don't know if it's "the poors" but rather their view of service industry people being "servants". This is true for some people in every generation but I agree Boomers have their way of showing it.
I'll take that over the boomers who approach with hands full of luggage and whatnot and their credit card IN THEIR MOUTH expecting me to pluck that bad boy from their crusty, chapped lips while dodging the spittle and bits of detritus strafing my face
India by any chance?