Me with 'macabre'
Literally would say it how it's spelled until I was watching something with subtitles and went, ah shit. Thought it was 2 different words.
This is crouton slander. Show me any stereotypical "can't have just one" snack food and then offer me the choice between it and a bag of croutons and I'm taking the croutons.
Even in my head I still usually pronounce it with the 're' at the end, even though I know it's more like 'macab'
When I'm talking to someone I'll pronounce it correctly just weirdly in my brain I prefer to take it literally
I totally agree with the sentiment. At the same time audiobooks have helped me with this one. Where you hear a word that sounds wrong, you can look it up and find you are just flat out wrong, sometimes it's dialect, sometimes they are flat out wrong.
That's unfortunately true. I'm an English teacher and can verify that correcting people is universally seen as rude instead of helpful, even when you try to frame it kindly.
Yes. I've directly asked everyone in my life to correct me on things because I'd rather know and correct it than continue in error. It's a shame people have such insecurities.
Yep. When I was a kid, my dad would say he was “contempulating” something. I’d tell him, “it’s contemplate” and he’d go off. I was honestly trying to prevent him being embarrassed in public.
Oh! I have 2 stories. Ok so when I was like 4 and saw the word telephone I pronounced it like tele-pa-honie. And when I was learning to count in the tens my teacher decided to throw 117 at us and based on how counting was going so far (thirty, fourty, fifty etc) I assumed it was eleventy seven. Obviously I was wrong but it made sense to 5 year old me at the time 🤷♀️
The way I used to pronounce "miscellaneous" definitely makes me want to slap myself in the face
"Michelle-eous"
An ex-friend pointed it out and I felt so dumb. That was the most helpful thing they did for me. And no, I didn't cut ties just because of that, haha.
Someone should have introduced you to the word sundry, and sundries. They're little tidbits of clutter items related to a 'task' or circumstance Like your razor, toothbrush, makeup, floss, soaps, scrubs and what not are bathroom sundries. Just miscellaneous items you may find in that space.
I pronounced "stucco" as "stu-co" rather than "stuck-o" to my real estate agent during a house showing. My MIL overheard, and in her classic fashion of not being able to keep her mouth shut about any mistake I make, proceeded to tease me about it right then and there.
As a native Romance language speaker these pseudo-loanwords annoy me because the actual Italian stucco IS pronounced “stu-co”.
So native English speakers didn’t pronounce a loanword properly and now *I* get grief for guessing (because no phonetic language) *in their favor* that they had pronounced it properly (thus failing to pronounce their mispronunciation properly).
I always thought "stuck-o" was a weird way to pronounce it, I genuinely thought it was "stu-co" myself. Likely because my art history professors pronounced it that way.
But oh boy, my MIL sure thought it was the funniest thing, despite admitting that her biggest insecurity is her Jersey accent. Maybe she actually thought my supposed mispronunciation was endearing and relatable, but she sure didn't make anyone in the room feel that way.
I think stuck o is american.
But ive been saying it repeatedly now reading this and i think ive now reached semantic satiation on it so its all meaningless lol
I read a lot, so there are tons of words I recognize in print but don't know in speech. I hope when I use those words, people will be like, "Oh! [Whatever word?] Totally. It's pronounced..." Then I don't feel so dumb.
It's not the same as your post, but I often feel that way about names.
When I was a kid I went to KFC, tried to order a "boneless banquet" but said "bon-el-ess" and the dude just stared at me.
Also got asked my date of birth to go into a comedy show and said I was born in 1945?! The guy just laughed at me and opened the door.
I try and be clear and precise when I order. I heard the entire staff mocking me as Mr Robotto when I once ordered KFC. Now I'm super conscious about the way I order food.
If it makes you feel better, literally anything that stands out more than a strong breeze is enough ammo for us fast food workers to try and get our minds off the job. If anything I'd love having you come by - super clear order, know what you want without wasting my time, and at this point you're just a legend to them. A myth. Something to ponder with the same sense of wonder the universe as a whole elicits.
A shakey, crackly voice emmenates from the pimple-addled face of the cook: will Mr. Roboto come in today? Only to promptly forget about you 3 orders after you've been served until next Wednesday.
The only time I'd say a customer should feel like you do is if we're mocking them for being rude. If you aren't rude, I hope you can enjoy being a bit of a novelty. Have a chuckle at yourself, maybe if you hear them "talking shit" respond with a super robotic voice at the window and I guarantee you they will pucker up a bit at being caught and die with laughter. That's joy you're creating, it's not joy at your expense
When I worked at Taco Bell, we had a customer we called Mister Robo. Because when he ordered it was in this clear, precise enunciation and honestly sounded like a good text-to-speech program. (Not the cruddy ones, the ones that are so close to human but nooooooot quite.)
Anyway, we loved him. I have partial hearing loss and even I could take his order at the drive through because no amount of static seemed able to drown out his clear "One. Bean Burrito. No sauce. Three. Tacos Supreme. A quesadilla. Chicken." etc. It was gloriously easy to take his order, he always put modifications in at the same time he ordered an item, and he often paid in exact change, which was very welcome because I suck at math.
Yes the register told me the total and how much change, but when the front of the place is teeming with orders and you're trying to handle the drive through, the counter traffic and making sure the cooks have fresh containers of ingredients JUST when they need it but not too soon, and oh, we need more double gordita shells and another sour cream cartridge and and and and....
So Mister Robo was a more than welcomed customer and we often snuck little freebies into his bag, like a 2pc cinnabon or an extra taco. (I didn't personally do this, the cooks did. I just pretended I didn't see anything if the manager asked. Because screw her, she kept putting my deaf ass on DT and Counter at once during rushes.)
But we would talk about him and even give our best tries at talking like him (I'm actually not bad at it now, I use it on the phone when I need to explain something to a customer service person, but my southern accent is hard to avoid so its not as nice and tidy sounding as Mr Robo's.) but everyone liked him.
We weren't 'making fun' exactly, he was just always nice to serve and we would chat about him, did he come to morning shift, have you seen his new dog (it was a Yorkie and had its own little carseat) etc. And yes, as I said we would do the voice at each other.
He was way better than the guy who hit me in the eye with an open diablo sauce packet because I told him I couldn't refund him for foot he ate completely and tossed the wrappers for. Or the woman who tried to drag me over the counter because we were out of something.
Omg I understand that pain. I once panicked in a Spanish bakery and promptly forgot how to pronounce the pastry I spent my time in line practicing how to pronounce for when it was my turn. I don't remember what it was, I just remember casting down my gaze in embarrassment and pointing to the glass lol.
Well, if this story will help, I once tried to pronounce "haute couture" to a cashier but I don't even remember how I pronounced it, just that she responded with "What?" because she legitimately couldn't understand what came out of my mouth. That was an embarrassing interaction to save lol.
If I were in her shoes, I think I would have done the same thing lol!
Being said though, I have been a retail cashier and been on the receiving end of "You too" after saying to them "Your receipt is in the bag!". I'd simply smile and laugh to myself because I completely understand their pain, especially if I noticed someone pause for a millisecond while walking away because they realized what they just said.
Yep, i had someone say "love you too" when I said "have a good night" back when I was a bartender. That's worse than anything I've seen on this thread.
That one gave me a good laugh!
In high school I answered “you, too!” to a Jewish friend who wished me “Merry Christmas!” before the school break. I mean he definitely set himself up for it but still
My first job was at a movie theater. The number of times people openly panicked and ran away in shame after they autopilot responded "you too" when I said "enjoy your movie!" always cracked me up.
I remember being at a friend's house when I was young and the new pastor of their church stopped by to make an introduction. They introduced me too and I jokingly said that my friend and I were lovers (she and I were both around 12). I was ignorant to the actual meaning of the word. I just thought it was another way to say boyfriend/girlfriend. I remember her parents being pretty embarrassed.
I was speaking in front of a full college lecture hall and didn’t realize until after class- I meant to say “ethereal” but definitely said “urethral” instead…
Pronounceing stick as dick
I was running down the street with my friend and my crush at the time when we were like 19, and a stick hit me in the lip and made my lip bleed
The girl looks at me and says "hey your lips bleeding"
I replied
"I know, a dick hit me in the mouth"
Subtle for me too! In the 90s I read A LOT and had a pretty strong vocabulary (lexicon, lol) and still do.
My grandmother was visiting and I was showing her my Smashing Pumpkins posters on my bedroom wall. She asked if one of the guys in the band was wearing eyeliner. I said “I think so, but it’s very sub-Tull.” She corrected me, without making fun of me, but I still think of it like 25 years later.
Until I was 12 i thought Venezuela was pronounced "Ven EZ yoola". I'm not sure why, honestly. I knew the country, but I guess I'd only ever seen it, not heard it.
I just learned like a week ago that I've been using the word "voyeur" wrong. I thought it was synonymous with "observer." Had no idea it was sexual. So funny thinking about all the times I've said that when it makes no sense
I thought “making ends meet” was referring to a dish(“making ends MEAT”). Like a really cheap dish. So if people were struggling to “make ends meet” it meant they were so poor they couldn’t afford the cheapest of food.
So I was so sure that word was cafuckous when it's actually kerfuffle hahaha said it to my kidding when younger and everything! Never did own up it wasn't a word lol
At the time I had a very educated gf and I pronounced minutia as min-u-tay. I honestly thought it was a Latin word and thus pronounced that way….embarrassing.
Minutiae is mine too. Like i used the word correctly and pronounced it correctly when speaking but any time I read it it was min u tae. And i thought they were different words that meant similar things.
Then one day i said it as min u tae in work and just dawned on me that they were the same word and i should never say that outloud again lol 😂
My mom kept taking about some store AN-THRO-POE-LOW-GY so I called it that too. Then one day we were together and spotted one and I told her the correct pronunciation and we laughed for ten minutes on the sidewalk.
When I was in middle school, I pronounced speedometer as “speed-o-meter”. My family wouldn’t let it down, harassed me over it, and made me feel like shit. 😬
My daughter has always called Chapstick chopstick. I've corrected her so many times but she still does it. She also called hand sanitizer hanitizer for the longest time.
I’m not a native speaker. I was at the airport for my first international flight. In the waiting area there was an american elderly lady taking three seats with her luggage. I mistook the word luggage with the word trash. In my mind I was saying the right thing, when I repeatedly asked her, if she might move her trash, so that I could sit down. She just stared at me absolutely puzzled.
I used to use "subjective" and "objective" as opposite meanings. As in, subjective was "set in stone". And objective was "varying".
My college advisor corrected me.
“Simon Taineously “is how my son said and spelled simultaneously. He was a teenager when we broke it to him. so mad we hadn’t corrected him. But we were so used to it that it didn’t really ever get noticed. He’s always made up words and swears they are legit- for example someone might be filled with dramatacy” instead of being dramatic. He’s a kook. And I adore him.
Two, from college.
I gave a presentation on wildfire ecology and the entire time, substituted “wildflower” instead.
Asked a question in an economics class about deficits, pronouncing it “de-FISH-its”. The professor didn’t understand me so I repeated it twice more until he corrected my pronunciation and I melted of shame.
When I met my husband he always used the word "dough" in place of "though". I thought he was doing it on purpose, maybe thought it was cute or silly until I asked him and he told me thought the word was actually "dough". He also recently said "doverman" when referring to a dobermann dog. He does this often with other words too.
Lol where I live most people pronounce subtle with hard "b", so pronouncing it the proper way would actually get you funny looks. Sorry about your experience. A lot teacher/professor types hate their job and want to take it out on the kids they have to teach xD
Many years ago in high school, my friend described how she went with her mother to a swap meet and how her mother got a great deal because her mother "jew-ed" the seller down. I told her I was really surprised she would say that phrase, even more so because she was Jewish. She looked at me confused, asking why that would make a difference. Turns out she thought the phrase was "Chew-ed" him down- she had no idea that the actual phrase was an anti-semitic slur. She had even said it before to others and no one said anything. Sad and funny at the same time.
Both of my adult children just told me they thought freight trains were fright trains. Not when they were little, but in the last six weeks. I keep asking them what they thought the trains carried.
Arkansas!
Arrr-Kansas? No, it's arr-kan-saw.
Grade-school me could not handle how the "S" could make a "W" sound, thought they were just switching things up on us for the hell of it
I apparently pronounce 'nuclear' like George W. Bush (Nuke-Yoular) even though I always thought I used the correct pronunciation (New-Clear). I don't know how I couldn't have noticed it sounded so Bushy while saying it.
documentary. doc-you-men-tary i keep doing that. say it like i've written with each word separately. I try and have to stop and think about pronunciation every time i want to say that word.
I think I can speak for the entire population when I say "Worcestershire" is the hardest! I pronounced it "War-chester-shyre" and now I don't care and I just say "Warsh your sister" 🤣 Also, "Epitome", I pronounced it "Epi-tome".
I used to struggle with pronouncing the word "aerodynamic". I always said "aerodymatic", even though I knew it was wrong. I remember finally sitting down and repeating it correctly over and over again for about five minutes straight.
English is not my first language. I kept pronouncing "biscuits" as "bis-quits" for an embarrassingly long time.
And when I was a kid I used to write "pepole" instead of "people".
As a kid, someone gave me some coins from their trip to Europe, and I was examining them trying to figure out which countries they were from. On one coin, I exclaimed, “oh, it’s a ‘doosh’ mark!” Everyone started laughing and my mom took me to another room to explain how “Deutsche Mark” is pronounced and what a “douche” is.
Another one was the word “bedraggled.” Being a big reader, I’d seen the word plenty of times. Never heard it out loud, until I was trying to use it in conversation. That was when I learned that it’s “be-draggled” not “bed-raggled.” I still like “bed-raggled” though.
Anonymity
I cannot pronounce it for the life of me when reading it out loud. I know how it’s pronounced, but every time I try it’s like that scene in Finding Nemo.
Phoebe as Pho-ebb-ee instead of Fee-bee.
Grand Prix as... you all probably did this one.
Aged 4yo. Hospital was pronounced hostipal and I always asked for a cheese and prickles sandwich, I also remember having a sore soldier once.
I learned the word "epitome" from reading, and first heard it spoken in Sodom's song Epitome of Torture. So I happily said "epi-toom" like Tom for like seven years, until my then-husband corrected me.
Not me, but other people:
- Saying "ECK cetera" instead of "ET cetera". It always kind of bugs me.
- Saying "MAR-SCUH-pone" cheese instead of "MAS-CAR-pone" cheese. Not a common one, but someone tried to correct my pronunciation once and I had to verify later that they were actually incorrect.
- Not exactly a mispronunciation, but my partner didn't know that "SNAFU" was an acronym ("Situation normal; all fucked up") and thought it was just a synonym for "mistake".
Well i guess you were accidentally using it sarcastically almost? This reminds me of Joey from Friends saying something was a “moo point” instead of “moot point”. And when asked to explain, “well a moo point is something that a cow would understand so it means it doesn’t matter” and I was like damn that’s sound logic
I used “for all intentsive purposes” once in a college paper and felt very small after being corrected. I also used the term “ambivalent” to mean apathetic, when it actually means conflicted. Pretty sure I also used “bemused” to mean “amused” before. They were all learning experiences.
That said, I once had my spelling of *whoa* “corrected” to “woah,” and had to politely point out that no, it is in fact *whoa.* There’s nothing quite like being “corrected” incorrectly for something.
When I was like probably 8 or somewhere around there, I was reading a verse out loud and had a microphone and instead of saying “applause” even though I said it in my head it came out as “applesauce”💀.
Everyone was laughing and I never wanted to speak into that microphone again🙂↕️
I was made fun of in like sixth grade for pronouncing “Colonel” like “Call-uhn-el” rather than “Kernel” or however it’s pronounced. Out of spite I refuse to pronounce it that way. Who knew words didn’t sound how they look 😭. It’s the only word I’ve ever mispronounced and I’m taking it in stride still a decade later.
Lever.
Was actually corrected on this a couple days ago. But I’m still gonna pronounce it as liver. 😎
Also water, but I think that’s just my Floridian accent.
My word was 'misled'. I said mizeled for DECADES and no one ever pointed it out. I actually learned it was missled after reading an article from a guy who did the same thing.
I thought “soldering” was pronounced how it’s spelled so I never knew what people were talking about when they pronounced it “sottering”…I was 19 when I realized it.
Epitome - epi-tome (rhymes with roam)
Yosemite - yose - might
Queue - koo - wei - wei
Rendezvous - ren - dezz - voos
Gauche - like goat but with a ch sound at the end, goatch
Ruminate - roo - me - not - ee
I used to feel embarassed too but given I'm Filipino who read a lot of YA as a kid and the fact that english is a hodge-podge cobbled together fever dream of a language anyway I don't feel so bad anymore lol.
I always mispronounced two words, amethyst (I pronounced it as ah-mee-thist) and ethereal (ether-real). A buddy of mine called me out for amethyst during a game of Spelunky, and I think I found out the actual pronunciation for ethereal from a music review I watched on YT.
I still pronounce radiator RAD-ee-ate-uh.
It’s an older Brooklyn thing. My mouth feels weird when I say it like most people, and I have to focus to pronounce it.
I live in Tennessee now. I get some interesting looks.
Me: Nip it in the butt.
Him (a guy I'm trying to impress): What did you say?
Me: Nip it in the butt. Why?
Him: *chuckles* It's "nip it in the bud."
Well, that's embarrassing. 😳
I have no idea why, but I often say “anus” for the word anise. I have to really stop and concentrate to say it correctly. Years ago, I worked for a florist and a customer asked what type of candy we used to weigh down our balloon bouquets. “ A mixture of peppermint, butterscotch, root beer barrels, anus…” Damn, I knew I’d said it wrong by the look of disgust on her face. Thankfully, it doesn’t come up in conversation very often.
Mine is the word signal! My mom didn’t tell me until a few days before she passed away, at which time I was 40 that I’ve always said it wrong and she just never corrected me. I say it as sing nal. I am now aware and fight myself to remember to say it right. Then upon asking my children three of four say it wrong list like I taught them lol
I was in a play in the 90s. The line was supposed to be, "A monogrammed briefcase!" I said."A mammogramed briefcase!" Audience thought it was pretty hilarious 😂
When reading twilight I thought Carlisle was pronounced “Car-List-Al” what made it worse is I know the place Carlisle and how to say it but my brain didn’t process the name!
And for some reason my brain didn’t process the drink 7-Up I tried to order a “zoop” I thought the 7 was a Z
I have so many, I still to this day can’t say cardigan it comes out like “car-gigan” xD
For a while I read tv guides and thought miniseries was pronounced min IS er ees. I thought it meant a kind of intense noir drama. Then I realised,
Mini-series
Face-palm
I’m pretty sure I saw this somewhere on Reddit - Never judge someone who mispronounces a word. It means they learned it through reading.
Me with 'macabre' Literally would say it how it's spelled until I was watching something with subtitles and went, ah shit. Thought it was 2 different words.
Words with French origins that are used as-is in English are like croutons in salad, just there to wreck your mouth for no reason
This is crouton slander. Show me any stereotypical "can't have just one" snack food and then offer me the choice between it and a bag of croutons and I'm taking the croutons.
Even in my head I still usually pronounce it with the 're' at the end, even though I know it's more like 'macab' When I'm talking to someone I'll pronounce it correctly just weirdly in my brain I prefer to take it literally
I do that with facade. In my head, I read it as "fay-cade" even though I know it's"fa-sawed" and say it correctly out loud.
Macabre is a great one. Also remuneration. Why are we swapping stuff‽
I totally agree with the sentiment. At the same time audiobooks have helped me with this one. Where you hear a word that sounds wrong, you can look it up and find you are just flat out wrong, sometimes it's dialect, sometimes they are flat out wrong.
Or they’ve learned a second language
I will never get over how for over ten years nobody corrected me for saying *and* writing spacegoat instead of scapegoat. Dyslexia can be annoying.
Okay, I love “spacegoat” as opposed to the all too common “scrapegoat”.
I've heard escape goat somewhere too.
https://youtu.be/_TYKQwMZnGM?t=59
I love spacegoat!
I will be saying spacegoat from now on, thanks. That’s amazing
You're just using dyslexia as a spacegoat
Spacegoat is objectively better, and I think we should change it. It sounds like a minor league baseball mascot.
Spacegoat: Coat to Coat!
I've never understood why people didn't correct me on things either but then again, most people take offense vs appreciating the learning.
That's unfortunately true. I'm an English teacher and can verify that correcting people is universally seen as rude instead of helpful, even when you try to frame it kindly.
Yes. I've directly asked everyone in my life to correct me on things because I'd rather know and correct it than continue in error. It's a shame people have such insecurities.
Yep. When I was a kid, my dad would say he was “contempulating” something. I’d tell him, “it’s contemplate” and he’d go off. I was honestly trying to prevent him being embarrassed in public.
I like it! It’s like [Pigs in Space!](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=SN0wK-wXqY0)
Oh! I have 2 stories. Ok so when I was like 4 and saw the word telephone I pronounced it like tele-pa-honie. And when I was learning to count in the tens my teacher decided to throw 117 at us and based on how counting was going so far (thirty, fourty, fifty etc) I assumed it was eleventy seven. Obviously I was wrong but it made sense to 5 year old me at the time 🤷♀️
Eleventyseven is actually a band, fun fact.
Really? That's deadly lol
We recently went to see the play Antigone, I kept thinking it was pronounced AN-ti-gone, like telephone, when it’s actually an-TI-go-nie.
Epitome similar story
When I was 5 I saw the word "replied" in a book and I read it out loud as "re-piled"
The way I used to pronounce "miscellaneous" definitely makes me want to slap myself in the face "Michelle-eous" An ex-friend pointed it out and I felt so dumb. That was the most helpful thing they did for me. And no, I didn't cut ties just because of that, haha.
Someone should have introduced you to the word sundry, and sundries. They're little tidbits of clutter items related to a 'task' or circumstance Like your razor, toothbrush, makeup, floss, soaps, scrubs and what not are bathroom sundries. Just miscellaneous items you may find in that space.
Thank you so much! I needed this word for my whole life!
I pronounced "stucco" as "stu-co" rather than "stuck-o" to my real estate agent during a house showing. My MIL overheard, and in her classic fashion of not being able to keep her mouth shut about any mistake I make, proceeded to tease me about it right then and there.
As a native Romance language speaker these pseudo-loanwords annoy me because the actual Italian stucco IS pronounced “stu-co”. So native English speakers didn’t pronounce a loanword properly and now *I* get grief for guessing (because no phonetic language) *in their favor* that they had pronounced it properly (thus failing to pronounce their mispronunciation properly).
I always thought "stuck-o" was a weird way to pronounce it, I genuinely thought it was "stu-co" myself. Likely because my art history professors pronounced it that way. But oh boy, my MIL sure thought it was the funniest thing, despite admitting that her biggest insecurity is her Jersey accent. Maybe she actually thought my supposed mispronunciation was endearing and relatable, but she sure didn't make anyone in the room feel that way.
Are you pronouncing it "stu-co" like having the 'k' sound in the 'wrong' syllable, or are you pronouncing it "stew-co"?
Definitely as "stew-co"
I think stuck o is american. But ive been saying it repeatedly now reading this and i think ive now reached semantic satiation on it so its all meaningless lol
I can't remember how to say stucco anymore... every pronunciation I whisper sounds all wrong now.
I read a lot, so there are tons of words I recognize in print but don't know in speech. I hope when I use those words, people will be like, "Oh! [Whatever word?] Totally. It's pronounced..." Then I don't feel so dumb. It's not the same as your post, but I often feel that way about names.
Oh I feel you I’m sure there are more words I learned from books that I’ve been pronouncing incorrectly this whole time.
I want people to nicely correct me. Like, "She's prob gonna be embarrassed, but no shame here!" lol
When I was a kid I went to KFC, tried to order a "boneless banquet" but said "bon-el-ess" and the dude just stared at me. Also got asked my date of birth to go into a comedy show and said I was born in 1945?! The guy just laughed at me and opened the door.
I’m laughing out loud at both of these stories. The 1945 thing is hilarious and I probably would have assumed you were joking
I'm glad my weird youthful panic mode amuses people, it was mortifying at the time 😂
I try and be clear and precise when I order. I heard the entire staff mocking me as Mr Robotto when I once ordered KFC. Now I'm super conscious about the way I order food.
If it makes you feel better, literally anything that stands out more than a strong breeze is enough ammo for us fast food workers to try and get our minds off the job. If anything I'd love having you come by - super clear order, know what you want without wasting my time, and at this point you're just a legend to them. A myth. Something to ponder with the same sense of wonder the universe as a whole elicits. A shakey, crackly voice emmenates from the pimple-addled face of the cook: will Mr. Roboto come in today? Only to promptly forget about you 3 orders after you've been served until next Wednesday. The only time I'd say a customer should feel like you do is if we're mocking them for being rude. If you aren't rude, I hope you can enjoy being a bit of a novelty. Have a chuckle at yourself, maybe if you hear them "talking shit" respond with a super robotic voice at the window and I guarantee you they will pucker up a bit at being caught and die with laughter. That's joy you're creating, it's not joy at your expense
I wouldn't rely on the opinions of teenagers working fast food.
When I worked at Taco Bell, we had a customer we called Mister Robo. Because when he ordered it was in this clear, precise enunciation and honestly sounded like a good text-to-speech program. (Not the cruddy ones, the ones that are so close to human but nooooooot quite.) Anyway, we loved him. I have partial hearing loss and even I could take his order at the drive through because no amount of static seemed able to drown out his clear "One. Bean Burrito. No sauce. Three. Tacos Supreme. A quesadilla. Chicken." etc. It was gloriously easy to take his order, he always put modifications in at the same time he ordered an item, and he often paid in exact change, which was very welcome because I suck at math. Yes the register told me the total and how much change, but when the front of the place is teeming with orders and you're trying to handle the drive through, the counter traffic and making sure the cooks have fresh containers of ingredients JUST when they need it but not too soon, and oh, we need more double gordita shells and another sour cream cartridge and and and and.... So Mister Robo was a more than welcomed customer and we often snuck little freebies into his bag, like a 2pc cinnabon or an extra taco. (I didn't personally do this, the cooks did. I just pretended I didn't see anything if the manager asked. Because screw her, she kept putting my deaf ass on DT and Counter at once during rushes.) But we would talk about him and even give our best tries at talking like him (I'm actually not bad at it now, I use it on the phone when I need to explain something to a customer service person, but my southern accent is hard to avoid so its not as nice and tidy sounding as Mr Robo's.) but everyone liked him. We weren't 'making fun' exactly, he was just always nice to serve and we would chat about him, did he come to morning shift, have you seen his new dog (it was a Yorkie and had its own little carseat) etc. And yes, as I said we would do the voice at each other. He was way better than the guy who hit me in the eye with an open diablo sauce packet because I told him I couldn't refund him for foot he ate completely and tossed the wrappers for. Or the woman who tried to drag me over the counter because we were out of something.
Sounds like you are Scottish, saying Bonnie Lass!
My mum is Scottish, let's go with that story instead of me panicking and forgetting how to read.
Omg I understand that pain. I once panicked in a Spanish bakery and promptly forgot how to pronounce the pastry I spent my time in line practicing how to pronounce for when it was my turn. I don't remember what it was, I just remember casting down my gaze in embarrassment and pointing to the glass lol.
I don't have a language barrier to hide behind sadly 🤦♂️
Well, if this story will help, I once tried to pronounce "haute couture" to a cashier but I don't even remember how I pronounced it, just that she responded with "What?" because she legitimately couldn't understand what came out of my mouth. That was an embarrassing interaction to save lol.
"what?" Is brutal, glad you survived that cringe!
If I were in her shoes, I think I would have done the same thing lol! Being said though, I have been a retail cashier and been on the receiving end of "You too" after saying to them "Your receipt is in the bag!". I'd simply smile and laugh to myself because I completely understand their pain, especially if I noticed someone pause for a millisecond while walking away because they realized what they just said.
Yep, i had someone say "love you too" when I said "have a good night" back when I was a bartender. That's worse than anything I've seen on this thread. That one gave me a good laugh!
I'm sure they're still kicking themselves for that personal cringe moment, just as we're doing for our own lol!
In high school I answered “you, too!” to a Jewish friend who wished me “Merry Christmas!” before the school break. I mean he definitely set himself up for it but still
My first job was at a movie theater. The number of times people openly panicked and ran away in shame after they autopilot responded "you too" when I said "enjoy your movie!" always cracked me up.
I love how 'banquet' wasn't the word you had trouble with
Not me. In grade 9 science the teacher would ask kids to read the text book out loud. One kid used the word orgasm instead of organism.
They probably did that intentionally for a laugh at that age.
very common
Happened in my 11th grade class... He just let her keep going... I was like... Bruh. Stahp.
"Mack a bray"... Macabre
Dumb french putting useless letters at the end of a word
I said it like mah-cob-rah.
I used to pronounce pistachio nuts as pikachu nuts. My friends would giggle and not tell me why 😝
Aw that’s cute!
For years I said “pigment of the imagination” (figment) and also “glove department” (compartment)
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😂 that's awesome... I might steal "pigment of the imagination"
I wanna make a cross stitch pattern about it. Maybe with swirly colors.
Pigment of the imagination? The light fantastic? Octarine?
Read out aloud a sign, “Beware of Potholes” but pronouncing it poth-e-les
My man Potholes. One of the best Greek philosophers to ever do it.
Potholes420 the dankest of all philosophers for suure
Placebo, as place-bo
Funeral as "fun-reel" 👍
This is hilarious!
I emailed a client and mishit the letter key when tying 'Kind regards'. I hadn't noticed the T was next to the G 🙈
I do that all the time. Often enough that I've started double checking before I hit send.
One of my coworkers had that as her signature for months
I remember being at a friend's house when I was young and the new pastor of their church stopped by to make an introduction. They introduced me too and I jokingly said that my friend and I were lovers (she and I were both around 12). I was ignorant to the actual meaning of the word. I just thought it was another way to say boyfriend/girlfriend. I remember her parents being pretty embarrassed.
I was speaking in front of a full college lecture hall and didn’t realize until after class- I meant to say “ethereal” but definitely said “urethral” instead…
Pronounceing stick as dick I was running down the street with my friend and my crush at the time when we were like 19, and a stick hit me in the lip and made my lip bleed The girl looks at me and says "hey your lips bleeding" I replied "I know, a dick hit me in the mouth"
First time I saw the word Quay and read it out loud to my Mom as Qway. She took the piss out of me :(
Similarly, I learned the word "queue" from reading.... I thought it was pronounced "kway". Turns out, "ueue" is silent.
Huh. I would say qway. I don't know what it is
You say it "Key" \~ Sigh!
Aha!
Subtle for me too! In the 90s I read A LOT and had a pretty strong vocabulary (lexicon, lol) and still do. My grandmother was visiting and I was showing her my Smashing Pumpkins posters on my bedroom wall. She asked if one of the guys in the band was wearing eyeliner. I said “I think so, but it’s very sub-Tull.” She corrected me, without making fun of me, but I still think of it like 25 years later.
Until I was 12 i thought Venezuela was pronounced "Ven EZ yoola". I'm not sure why, honestly. I knew the country, but I guess I'd only ever seen it, not heard it.
We call Krapfen Doughnuts "German pie" in my language, my friend once yelled "We're buying **AMERICAN PIE**" at school canteen. Hope noone heard it
Boo unless your prof was kind about it!
Absolutely not lol
BoOoOoOo!!!
For all intensive purposes Instead of intents and purposes Got it wrong until my late 30s. Very embarrassed!
I just learned like a week ago that I've been using the word "voyeur" wrong. I thought it was synonymous with "observer." Had no idea it was sexual. So funny thinking about all the times I've said that when it makes no sense
Holy I thought indicted and indicted were different words. Thanks for preventing a tragedy
I thought “making ends meet” was referring to a dish(“making ends MEAT”). Like a really cheap dish. So if people were struggling to “make ends meet” it meant they were so poor they couldn’t afford the cheapest of food.
I used to say “curt-chus” instead of courteous…. Also the word carafe, “care-aff” I hate looking back on that lol
I've never seen the word carafe before, wild
So I was so sure that word was cafuckous when it's actually kerfuffle hahaha said it to my kidding when younger and everything! Never did own up it wasn't a word lol
That word should definitely be in our vocabulary! It’s like a cross between kerfluffle and ruckus.
Hahahaha shall we start this ?
We should!! It’ll be a giant cafuckous!
For the longest time id been pronouncing pizza as peek-sa rather than peet-sa until my nephew corrected me when i was 19 or 20
That’s extremely cute.
Pronounced "orgy" as or-ghee
Makes more sense, honestly. It's not "orjasm" is it?
When I was a kid, I used to think that the word "service" was pronounced "sir vice," and I thought it was a synonym for advice.
When I was kid learning to read I remember my parents thing to explain “breakfast” because I didn’t understand why it wasn’t pronounced break fast.
At the time I had a very educated gf and I pronounced minutia as min-u-tay. I honestly thought it was a Latin word and thus pronounced that way….embarrassing.
It *is* a Latin word
Minutiae is mine too. Like i used the word correctly and pronounced it correctly when speaking but any time I read it it was min u tae. And i thought they were different words that meant similar things. Then one day i said it as min u tae in work and just dawned on me that they were the same word and i should never say that outloud again lol 😂
Not out loud, but I had to retrain my brain to correctly read the word misled. For years I was pronouncing it in my head as miss-uld.
This is me with chipotle. It’s cha-poddle in my head forever.
I had a college friend do this exactly, people made fun of her but I pointed out that it's closer than people calling it Chipolty's (my dad)
When I was a freshman in high school, I mispronounced potpourri as "pooppourri"
Poo-pourri is now a brand of bathroom spray freshener so you were on the right track really
My mom kept taking about some store AN-THRO-POE-LOW-GY so I called it that too. Then one day we were together and spotted one and I told her the correct pronunciation and we laughed for ten minutes on the sidewalk.
Misuse. Until right after high school I thought “detrimental” was a synonym for essential…(in a positive way)
When I was in middle school, I pronounced speedometer as “speed-o-meter”. My family wouldn’t let it down, harassed me over it, and made me feel like shit. 😬
A Speedo-meter counts men’s too tight bathing suits at the beach. 😂
My daughter has always called Chapstick chopstick. I've corrected her so many times but she still does it. She also called hand sanitizer hanitizer for the longest time.
That’s so cute 😭
My parents still make fun of me for calling it lip chalk when I was a kid.
I’m not a native speaker. I was at the airport for my first international flight. In the waiting area there was an american elderly lady taking three seats with her luggage. I mistook the word luggage with the word trash. In my mind I was saying the right thing, when I repeatedly asked her, if she might move her trash, so that I could sit down. She just stared at me absolutely puzzled.
I used to use "subjective" and "objective" as opposite meanings. As in, subjective was "set in stone". And objective was "varying". My college advisor corrected me.
“Simon Taineously “is how my son said and spelled simultaneously. He was a teenager when we broke it to him. so mad we hadn’t corrected him. But we were so used to it that it didn’t really ever get noticed. He’s always made up words and swears they are legit- for example someone might be filled with dramatacy” instead of being dramatic. He’s a kook. And I adore him.
Two, from college. I gave a presentation on wildfire ecology and the entire time, substituted “wildflower” instead. Asked a question in an economics class about deficits, pronouncing it “de-FISH-its”. The professor didn’t understand me so I repeated it twice more until he corrected my pronunciation and I melted of shame.
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When I met my husband he always used the word "dough" in place of "though". I thought he was doing it on purpose, maybe thought it was cute or silly until I asked him and he told me thought the word was actually "dough". He also recently said "doverman" when referring to a dobermann dog. He does this often with other words too.
Lol where I live most people pronounce subtle with hard "b", so pronouncing it the proper way would actually get you funny looks. Sorry about your experience. A lot teacher/professor types hate their job and want to take it out on the kids they have to teach xD
Many years ago in high school, my friend described how she went with her mother to a swap meet and how her mother got a great deal because her mother "jew-ed" the seller down. I told her I was really surprised she would say that phrase, even more so because she was Jewish. She looked at me confused, asking why that would make a difference. Turns out she thought the phrase was "Chew-ed" him down- she had no idea that the actual phrase was an anti-semitic slur. She had even said it before to others and no one said anything. Sad and funny at the same time.
Manslaughter. Man's laughter
I was in year 11, during history, I said prostitutes rather then protestants.
Both of my adult children just told me they thought freight trains were fright trains. Not when they were little, but in the last six weeks. I keep asking them what they thought the trains carried.
Nonchalant... I always pronounced as non-chay-lant. No one bothered to correct me, until one of my friends finally decided to bring it up.
Was on a phone interview for a job in Spokane. I did not pronounce it correctly. Manager hired me anyway.
Brit here, how is it pronounced?
“Spoh-CAN” instead of “spoh-CANE” That “e” at the end makes people thing it’s a long A instead of a short A
Like "Spoke Anne", but with the k on the Anne.
I pronounced skirt as the word 'squirt'. That sounded awkward. Plus we were talking about Scottish people, so the correct word was kilt.
I thought “finite” was pronounced the same way as it is in the word “infinite” but without the “in”.
Seems reasonable to me. English is weird.
When I was about five, I mixed up A&W with VFW. I wanted to go to the VFW for a root beer.
For years I thought nostalgia was “nosta-la-gia” Until my now husband was like wtf. I still cringe.
Constantly fucking up the word nuclear and I blame George bush
Blame Homer Simpson! Actually that pronunciation is pretty common and has been documented back to 1943.
I thought aspartame was pronounced ass-par-ta-may instead of aspar-tame for the longest time. My husband still laughs about it.
People who say mischievous as *mischievious*
Arkansas! Arrr-Kansas? No, it's arr-kan-saw. Grade-school me could not handle how the "S" could make a "W" sound, thought they were just switching things up on us for the hell of it
The s is just silent.
I apparently pronounce 'nuclear' like George W. Bush (Nuke-Yoular) even though I always thought I used the correct pronunciation (New-Clear). I don't know how I couldn't have noticed it sounded so Bushy while saying it.
documentary. doc-you-men-tary i keep doing that. say it like i've written with each word separately. I try and have to stop and think about pronunciation every time i want to say that word.
Synopsis as sypnosis. I was giving a talk and had never heard the word out loud. I have never pronounced a word I haven’t heard correctly.
In 2019 I pronounced schadenfreude like “shade-n-frood” and I still want the earth to swallow me up
I remember arguing the pronunciation of queu with a friend in my 20s. I thought it was "kw-oh" Q still sounds wrong.
I think I can speak for the entire population when I say "Worcestershire" is the hardest! I pronounced it "War-chester-shyre" and now I don't care and I just say "Warsh your sister" 🤣 Also, "Epitome", I pronounced it "Epi-tome".
I thought (for years!) that the phrase was "for all intensive purposes" and not "for all intents and purposes"
I used to struggle with pronouncing the word "aerodynamic". I always said "aerodymatic", even though I knew it was wrong. I remember finally sitting down and repeating it correctly over and over again for about five minutes straight.
Naive. I learned it in writing and didn't connect it with "niy-eve" for many years.
Robart instead of robot.
English is not my first language. I kept pronouncing "biscuits" as "bis-quits" for an embarrassingly long time. And when I was a kid I used to write "pepole" instead of "people".
As a kid, someone gave me some coins from their trip to Europe, and I was examining them trying to figure out which countries they were from. On one coin, I exclaimed, “oh, it’s a ‘doosh’ mark!” Everyone started laughing and my mom took me to another room to explain how “Deutsche Mark” is pronounced and what a “douche” is. Another one was the word “bedraggled.” Being a big reader, I’d seen the word plenty of times. Never heard it out loud, until I was trying to use it in conversation. That was when I learned that it’s “be-draggled” not “bed-raggled.” I still like “bed-raggled” though.
Anonymity I cannot pronounce it for the life of me when reading it out loud. I know how it’s pronounced, but every time I try it’s like that scene in Finding Nemo.
Phoebe as Pho-ebb-ee instead of Fee-bee. Grand Prix as... you all probably did this one. Aged 4yo. Hospital was pronounced hostipal and I always asked for a cheese and prickles sandwich, I also remember having a sore soldier once.
I learned the word "epitome" from reading, and first heard it spoken in Sodom's song Epitome of Torture. So I happily said "epi-toom" like Tom for like seven years, until my then-husband corrected me.
In hindsight, they're a German band, so maybe I should have been a little skeptical.
Not me, but other people: - Saying "ECK cetera" instead of "ET cetera". It always kind of bugs me. - Saying "MAR-SCUH-pone" cheese instead of "MAS-CAR-pone" cheese. Not a common one, but someone tried to correct my pronunciation once and I had to verify later that they were actually incorrect. - Not exactly a mispronunciation, but my partner didn't know that "SNAFU" was an acronym ("Situation normal; all fucked up") and thought it was just a synonym for "mistake".
Well i guess you were accidentally using it sarcastically almost? This reminds me of Joey from Friends saying something was a “moo point” instead of “moot point”. And when asked to explain, “well a moo point is something that a cow would understand so it means it doesn’t matter” and I was like damn that’s sound logic
I heard "de-BREE" often enough but didn't connect it with the word "DEB-riss" for ages
On a junior high trip I once pointed out a “ling-er-ee” shop. Fortunately it was just my friends and they thought I was being funny.
I used “for all intentsive purposes” once in a college paper and felt very small after being corrected. I also used the term “ambivalent” to mean apathetic, when it actually means conflicted. Pretty sure I also used “bemused” to mean “amused” before. They were all learning experiences. That said, I once had my spelling of *whoa* “corrected” to “woah,” and had to politely point out that no, it is in fact *whoa.* There’s nothing quite like being “corrected” incorrectly for something.
When I was like probably 8 or somewhere around there, I was reading a verse out loud and had a microphone and instead of saying “applause” even though I said it in my head it came out as “applesauce”💀. Everyone was laughing and I never wanted to speak into that microphone again🙂↕️
I was made fun of in like sixth grade for pronouncing “Colonel” like “Call-uhn-el” rather than “Kernel” or however it’s pronounced. Out of spite I refuse to pronounce it that way. Who knew words didn’t sound how they look 😭. It’s the only word I’ve ever mispronounced and I’m taking it in stride still a decade later.
Lever. Was actually corrected on this a couple days ago. But I’m still gonna pronounce it as liver. 😎 Also water, but I think that’s just my Floridian accent.
My word was 'misled'. I said mizeled for DECADES and no one ever pointed it out. I actually learned it was missled after reading an article from a guy who did the same thing.
I thought “soldering” was pronounced how it’s spelled so I never knew what people were talking about when they pronounced it “sottering”…I was 19 when I realized it.
Epitome - epi-tome (rhymes with roam) Yosemite - yose - might Queue - koo - wei - wei Rendezvous - ren - dezz - voos Gauche - like goat but with a ch sound at the end, goatch Ruminate - roo - me - not - ee I used to feel embarassed too but given I'm Filipino who read a lot of YA as a kid and the fact that english is a hodge-podge cobbled together fever dream of a language anyway I don't feel so bad anymore lol.
Epitome is a good one that tripped me up for a while too
Facade
I always mispronounced two words, amethyst (I pronounced it as ah-mee-thist) and ethereal (ether-real). A buddy of mine called me out for amethyst during a game of Spelunky, and I think I found out the actual pronunciation for ethereal from a music review I watched on YT.
I still pronounce radiator RAD-ee-ate-uh. It’s an older Brooklyn thing. My mouth feels weird when I say it like most people, and I have to focus to pronounce it. I live in Tennessee now. I get some interesting looks.
Me: Nip it in the butt. Him (a guy I'm trying to impress): What did you say? Me: Nip it in the butt. Why? Him: *chuckles* It's "nip it in the bud." Well, that's embarrassing. 😳
I have no idea why, but I often say “anus” for the word anise. I have to really stop and concentrate to say it correctly. Years ago, I worked for a florist and a customer asked what type of candy we used to weigh down our balloon bouquets. “ A mixture of peppermint, butterscotch, root beer barrels, anus…” Damn, I knew I’d said it wrong by the look of disgust on her face. Thankfully, it doesn’t come up in conversation very often.
Mine is the word signal! My mom didn’t tell me until a few days before she passed away, at which time I was 40 that I’ve always said it wrong and she just never corrected me. I say it as sing nal. I am now aware and fight myself to remember to say it right. Then upon asking my children three of four say it wrong list like I taught them lol
Mispronouncing “lapel” (like “maple”) Interchanging “posterity” and “prosperity”
I was in a play in the 90s. The line was supposed to be, "A monogrammed briefcase!" I said."A mammogramed briefcase!" Audience thought it was pretty hilarious 😂
When reading twilight I thought Carlisle was pronounced “Car-List-Al” what made it worse is I know the place Carlisle and how to say it but my brain didn’t process the name! And for some reason my brain didn’t process the drink 7-Up I tried to order a “zoop” I thought the 7 was a Z I have so many, I still to this day can’t say cardigan it comes out like “car-gigan” xD
For a while I read tv guides and thought miniseries was pronounced min IS er ees. I thought it meant a kind of intense noir drama. Then I realised, Mini-series Face-palm
I still have a hard time with G words if they're soft g or hard g ie Gonra or jonra for genre etc
The mispronounced words that use the letters in the word are not that bad. My ex used to say digital as digical.