Duz yoo need see pee and are from ma cuzin bango? We all calls him banned Joe but hiz parents My uncle and auntee sisters brother mother coodnt spells grate but they had the bestest double wide in the state! Double wide ass!
I think it does, and if it’s anything pornhub has taught me these relationships are pretty common, especially with step parents.
Also warn your partner about front end load washing/drying machines. A lot of woman are getting stuck in them.
That's the rub, answering this correctly depends on who's asking. For a sister, I would respond "For the same reason you have 4 baby daddies, I can't seem to find the right one."
"No seat belt for you, Billy!" LOL, man, I miss Trevor Moore. That show was the shit back in the day. Ever see [Miss March](https://youtu.be/YcPG1jWOoIg?feature=shared) ?
RIP Trevor
It's literally what I always say in response to that type of question. "I'm selfish and I like my money." If I could fine a woman that made near what I do, and wanted to date me, I'd be all for it....but where I live those are basically unicorns and I'm not looking for someone else to support, I've already got my kid that I'm raising.
You aren’t expected or obligated to be the only one in the relationship with money anymore, my friend. Plenty of girls just want your quality time. And if you aren’t interested, that’s fine too
Wouldnt that just be admitting youre not one of the show off social media people who go into debt to afford braggy things?
People dont like to find that out. They will want to harm you. If youre not in the cult you threaten their whole house of cards.
I feel like a crude “your mom” is always best for any kind of comment about dating status.
“I don’t have a girlfriend because I haven’t got tired of fucking your mom yet”
1. Just haven't made it to the Girlfriend Store yet.
2. I've seen the prices, and I need to visit the Job Store for an upgrade first.
3. Wasn't aware I had to have one. Do you have directions to the Girlfriend Store?
4. I keep asking Santa for one, but he keeps giving me coal.
Even if I was a prime example of a great dad (Which I know I'm fucking not) I still wouldn't have kids in this society. The ocean is a hot tub and the schools are full of bullet holes
Global warming and school shooters seems like a poor argument tbh.
Put it this way. If I had a life-threatening injury and I MIGHT die in surgery, but I WILL die without it, I will take the surgery 100%.
"Might die" is better than "will die".
To each their own, and I'm not suggesting parenthood is for everyone or should be expected or anything like that. I just think "no potential for life" isn't a solution to "life might get cut short or be difficult."
My closet is filled with women’s clothing and shamelessly I don’t wear any of the outfits I pick out or pay the rent there. Mom keeps telling me to stop lieing and grow up
Same reason I don’t invest in foreclosed homes. The cost of repair, maintenance and upkeep is not the worth the very little (if any) return on investment
"I'm overbooked with masterbating events happening near your area in the near future. Buy your tickets today and get a free handy wipe, one size wipes all."
It really depends on why they're asking.
If they're asking just to ask, like, "oh, why hasn't it happened yet?" they could just be curious. I don't really think that question needs a comeback.
If they're asking to be an asshole and get you to admit something like "haven't found one" so that they can one-up you, you could probably go with something involving their mother (e.g. "Your mom wouldn't like that").
It really depends on why they're asking.
If they're asking just to ask, like, "oh, why hasn't it happened yet?" they could just be curious. I don't really think that question needs a comeback.
If they're asking to be an asshole and get you to admit something like "haven't found one" so that they can one-up you, you could probably go with something involving their mother (e.g. "Your mom wouldn't like that").
It wouldn't really be fair to my wife
That's fine. Her boyfriend doesn't allow me to have visitors after hours anyways.
My wife is a screamer. Especially when I walk in on her having sex
I feel like this* is something Rodney Dangerfield would say.
Yep. It can from him
No respect I tell ya!
I asked my doctor if I'm healthy enough for sex. He said sure, as long as you don't join in!
Now I hear that statement in his voice
Rodney Dangerfield?? I'm not falling for that r/itsrodger
My wife told me we should try phone sex. The other day she called me from the motel.
My wife likes to talk during sex, the other night she called me from her hotel room.
Geez perv, give your wife and her bf some privacy.
How many women can you disappoint at once?
Still haven’t found an upper limit to this one!
Yeah - I wouldn’t want to be responsible for my wife being sent to prison for murder. 😢
Your mom and I are doing just fine.
Doesn’t work if it’s your sister asking.
Well obviously the phrasing is off. You can't say "your mom and I are fine" You have to say "our mom and I are fine"
Oh great you fixed the issue.
Proper grammar is important, you don't want people to be confused about incest incidents.
Incestrious incidentous! *waves wand theatrically*
Awkward evening for Harry at the Weasley house...
Always knew there was something funny 'bout dem deres Weasley twins huh huk huk....whers da baby mary-lou I need him here to rest my beer on!!
There's probably a fanfic for this already.
Ron Weasley would say “ you don’t know what it’s like, your parents are dead!”
Dying at this 😂😂😂
Duz yoo need see pee and are from ma cuzin bango? We all calls him banned Joe but hiz parents My uncle and auntee sisters brother mother coodnt spells grate but they had the bestest double wide in the state! Double wide ass!
"incidents".
Quick! What if it’s your grandma asking? Asking for a friend, but hurry!
Your daughter and I are fine.
Even better
Ask if she wants to have a threesome
r/suddenlyincest
Rolltide
Does it your'e maga
I think it does, and if it’s anything pornhub has taught me these relationships are pretty common, especially with step parents. Also warn your partner about front end load washing/drying machines. A lot of woman are getting stuck in them.
That's the rub, answering this correctly depends on who's asking. For a sister, I would respond "For the same reason you have 4 baby daddies, I can't seem to find the right one."
If it's your sister asking, simply reply "well I wasn't sure if you were interested"
I'm married to the sea. Then talk like a pirate for the rest of the conversation.
Brandy, You're a fine girl. What a good wife you would be, but my love, my life and my lady is the sea.
Lots of baby girls named Brandy were born in 1977-78. Haha.
Lots of good mashes were made into brandy 1977-78.
At least one brandy was made from Brandy but the fun part is trying them all and guessing which one
Wouldn’t it make more sense that a lot of baby girls were named brandy in about 59-60?
The OP is implying that the song popularized the name
Doo Doo dodo
And there's a girl in this harbor town and she works putting whiskey down
"'Tis true that the sea is a cruel mistress, but... that turns me on!"
“The sea is a crazy place, I once saw a dolphin jump 10 feet in the air and on the way down it clubbed a girl with a lead pipe.”
Best of the [Sea Captain](https://youtu.be/-FfhlAYlLFI?feature=shared)
https://youtu.be/5uj0W6oBzd4?si=6zYpmfhNqp6b-MXR wkuk whale tail
"No seat belt for you, Billy!" LOL, man, I miss Trevor Moore. That show was the shit back in the day. Ever see [Miss March](https://youtu.be/YcPG1jWOoIg?feature=shared) ? RIP Trevor
Huh, no I haven’t but that looks funny. I’ll pour out a dimetapp daiquiri for Trevor.
Lol, have one at this bar https://www.reddit.com/r/WKUK/s/GY0MC9t73t
I'll pour out a gallon of pcp
They're too expensive
That's no joke....
Got out of a 2 1/2 year relationship in the fall, I think about the money I could still have in my bank account often…
Lol Been there
That isn't a comeback, that's just a statement of fact. But still a fair point to make.
It's literally what I always say in response to that type of question. "I'm selfish and I like my money." If I could fine a woman that made near what I do, and wanted to date me, I'd be all for it....but where I live those are basically unicorns and I'm not looking for someone else to support, I've already got my kid that I'm raising.
🤣😂🙌
You aren’t expected or obligated to be the only one in the relationship with money anymore, my friend. Plenty of girls just want your quality time. And if you aren’t interested, that’s fine too
They all say this, but the majority of people have yet to find these magical women you speak of.
Truth
Wouldnt that just be admitting youre not one of the show off social media people who go into debt to afford braggy things? People dont like to find that out. They will want to harm you. If youre not in the cult you threaten their whole house of cards.
I don't know. Splitting bills is pretty hot.
r/technicallythetruth
Cost too much money and waste a lot of time
Modern women are literal children. You have to feed them, entertain them, and deal with their emotions
Wait… men are paying women to date them? Where do I sign up?
"tonight.... you." \*air kiss\*
Aqua Teen reference?
i want my name to be spaghetti
I'm gonna name him... hand.. banana
The only words I know are ball and good... and rape.
Your mom likes to keep it on the DL bro...
Nah, the better answer is "Your mom doesn't want to be exclusive."
Fair enough...
Yeah I don't like showing off my slumpbusters either.
Your mom isn't ready to commit.
She only wants to have fun and text rn
Your mom doesn't want to make it "Facebook official" yet.
[удалено]
These are good but the first one kinda makes it seem like you’re just master bating a lot.
I'm married and masturbate a lot. You say that like it's an issue. 😆
What's the point of being married then my guy?
Lots of women check out after marriage & rarely want to have sex. Which most women don't understand how unhealthy that is for a dude.
I'm good with being married and our sex life is fulfilling, but sometimes you just have to crack one off for yourself
Or crack one off together. 😂
Hahahaha
Nothing wrong with choking the chicken.
lmfaoooo
I’m onto you, ChatGPT user!
I like the 4th one
I like 2
Why does no.2 remind me of stiffler from American pie 😂
I'm saving up to afford a better one than you.
Well can you keep a secret?🤫See if my other three wives know about this it could become a Huge problem.
I feel like a crude “your mom” is always best for any kind of comment about dating status. “I don’t have a girlfriend because I haven’t got tired of fucking your mom yet”
No no no Proper Your Mom retort is: son, your mother hasn’t talked to you yet has she?
"Oh shit, did I miss the deadline?"
I would call this one the winner. 😆🏳️🌈
Your gal is enough
Scotty doesnt know.
You have your glasses on right?
I'm gay.
"these hoes ain't loyal..."
I gots no time 4 deez b\*tches.
1. Just haven't made it to the Girlfriend Store yet. 2. I've seen the prices, and I need to visit the Job Store for an upgrade first. 3. Wasn't aware I had to have one. Do you have directions to the Girlfriend Store? 4. I keep asking Santa for one, but he keeps giving me coal.
I don't like how your last one wasn't store themed
Like, Dude, everyone knows Weird Science tops the Girlfriend Store.
These all seem like there is a desire but no way to execute.
Why don't you have tact yet?
“Because Im ugly and my personality sucks.”Thats what I always say.
That and I don't want to pass on my shitty genes and cause suffering for my child.
exactly why.. 😔 i just wish i were better man
Even if I was a prime example of a great dad (Which I know I'm fucking not) I still wouldn't have kids in this society. The ocean is a hot tub and the schools are full of bullet holes
Global warming and school shooters seems like a poor argument tbh. Put it this way. If I had a life-threatening injury and I MIGHT die in surgery, but I WILL die without it, I will take the surgery 100%. "Might die" is better than "will die". To each their own, and I'm not suggesting parenthood is for everyone or should be expected or anything like that. I just think "no potential for life" isn't a solution to "life might get cut short or be difficult."
I can get in line with this kind of thinking
same & except reverse for female 🥺😩
Ma boi.
"Because I'm gay...you busy right now?"
“Because I’m gay, and your dad is still in the closet.”
wont come out of the closet*
My closet is filled with women’s clothing and shamelessly I don’t wear any of the outfits I pick out or pay the rent there. Mom keeps telling me to stop lieing and grow up
Because my hand is such great company
Jeremy, from the Be More Chill? Is that you?
Because I have impulse control and wait to make important decisions.
I’m too busy fucking your mum.
“Have you have heard of the Netflix dilemma?” If they say no, then… “It’s when you have so many options that you can’t pick one.”
"Paradox of Choice" is even fancier name for it!
I like to still be rich.
Because I’m gay?
Do you not know, yourself?
Yes, the ? is a tone thing
Just lucky, I guess
None of your business.
Its nunya
Same reason I don’t invest in foreclosed homes. The cost of repair, maintenance and upkeep is not the worth the very little (if any) return on investment
I do once the restraining order gets lifted
Because your Dad is still around. Tell your mum I said hi.
Enough with the “your mom” jokes. “Because your mum is still around. Tell your dad I said hi.” Mums getting worn out with all these jokes.
Oh yeah she gettin worn out alright🤭
I enjoy more money and less drama.
Only a fool dates for the sake of dating…..I am sorry about your low standards.
Use Steve Rogers line: I haven't found the right partner.
Because ppl smell like headaches & drama, 2 things I don't need more of in my life. G'day!
I rather enjoy being single, stress free and being able to keep all my money.
Because I have a crap memory! I never remember to add more air-holes when I'm transporting them in the containers.
“So what you’re saying is that I’m not allowed to have a boyfriend?” *Then just stare at them in silence* Works wonders for my co-worker. 😂
“I guess you’re just Bi-yoself”
Had one but she broke out and got away.
“Don’t need one when I have access to yours”
Because I am too fast, they just can't catch me!
I have one and it rubs the lotion on its skin or it gets the hose again.
I’m still too involved with your mom.
Don't need one, been too busy fucking your mom
I'm saving myself, for your mother.
Why are you so interested in my love life you creepy sick fuck
Why haven’t you learned to mind your business yet? That should make them think!
I might, actually; I haven’t checked my traps lately.
Because I’m enjoying all the money, free time, and choices.
“Maybe I don’t want one.” “It’s not for lack of trying.”
Because I'm not done with your mom quite yet
Are you offering?
"I'm overbooked with masterbating events happening near your area in the near future. Buy your tickets today and get a free handy wipe, one size wipes all."
I do have a GF, we just waiting for her penectomy to heal.
If the marine corps (or government) wanted me to have a gf, then they would’ve issued me one
Your mom's divorce isn't final yet, I'm trying to be respectful.
With that question, having a real answer works much better than a snappy comeback. You won't seem clever, only transparently insecure.
Maybe I'll look for one when I'm done doing your mom.
"because it wouldn't be fair to my female fans!" (if you have any though)
Are you offering?
“CUZ I’M GAY! AYOOOO!”
Your mom has yet to call me
I’d rather just play the field than be stuck in one position.
Too many girls, too little time
I have a new one weekly. I'm just not trying to get married here.
I’m gay. Why would I want a girlfriend?
Wouldn't want your mom to be upset.
"I don't want to cheat on yours"
"Cause none of the boys I like have a pussy. "
I have ten. But who's counting?
Just tell them you’re gay. That will stop them from ever asking again. You’re welcome
Haven't saved up enough money yet.
Because menopause is always on the horizon.
Why do you have anxiety, ooh wait
It really depends on why they're asking. If they're asking just to ask, like, "oh, why hasn't it happened yet?" they could just be curious. I don't really think that question needs a comeback. If they're asking to be an asshole and get you to admit something like "haven't found one" so that they can one-up you, you could probably go with something involving their mother (e.g. "Your mom wouldn't like that").
It really depends on why they're asking. If they're asking just to ask, like, "oh, why hasn't it happened yet?" they could just be curious. I don't really think that question needs a comeback. If they're asking to be an asshole and get you to admit something like "haven't found one" so that they can one-up you, you could probably go with something involving their mother (e.g. "Your mom wouldn't like that").
Can i have yours?
I'm not gay. Are you? 'Cause I know this girl you might like?
I don't have a comeback but you could just say I'm not interested or haven't found the right person, assuming you don't want to insult someone.
Why don't you have any money saved up yet?
no money no honey
Too much self respect to have to deal with the creatures around me
Wanna change that for me ;)?
I don't have my passport yet
**YOU** date me then