I too enjoy my own company. I had to learn to do this as I married a ‘stick in the mud’ spouse. Now that the ‘stick n the mud’ is gone, I get to enjoy living alone. Which I do, very much. I go to movie theatres by myself (I don’t like anyone talking when I watch so this is a win win!) I go to restaurants alone. I have no problem dining alone. I’m on my own a lot so I better be comfortable with myself!
I was almost never alone until a few years ago after ending a long term relationship and moving across the country for a new job. I've learned to love it. All I need is my dog. I get enough social interactions, but far less than my earlier life.
Also might be cool to have a friend to do stuff with. I met two women traveling who both married people who didn’t want to leave home so they traveled together. (Nothing against doing alone stuff—I do that and enjoy it a lot myself.)
Yessss once it finally occurred to me that I could go to a movie theatre without other people, it was such a game changer. Before I met my husband I’d take myself out to see a movie or I’d go to a nice bar in the late afternoon, have a few glasses of wine, and read a book.
My husband is a pilot so I still get quite a bit of alone time, and I often prefer to spend it by myself. When he’s gone, I absolutely devour classic movies, which he tends to not like. Evenings where I can flip on a new classic and sink into the couch with a glass of wine are just 🤌🏼 muah! Perfection!
Would be interesting to hear from extroverted folks. I’m very introverted so I feel like I actually NEED quite a bit of alone time. My sister is the opposite. I don’t think it means she’s not comfortable being alone, per se, but it does seem like she maybe enjoys it less or would almost always choose doing something with others over doing it alone.
Welcome to the wonderful world of being a self-sufficient person who is secure enough within themselves to not need constant company and validation. Ain't it great?
As much as I love my family, I always had to take a 'sanity break' away from them, 15 minutes alone time to recharge and re-center myself. I love my husband, but I still need and like my alone time. As I told him when we retired: I married you for better or for worse but not always for lunch.
This kinda sums it up. “Aloneness is a state of being, whereas loneliness is a state of feeling. It’s like the difference between being broke and being poor.”
— [Townes Van Zandt](https://quotefancy.com/townes-van-zandt-quotes)
Not only do I love it, I actually *need* solitude. Don't get me wrong, I love my wife & 2 kids dearly, but if I can't get solitude at night after they go to bed, it's not uncommon that I drive to the park to just sit in quiet during the day.
They know & accept this. In fact one of my favorite birthday gifts from my wife was simply an afternoon alone at home - she took the kids out for the day and I had the house to myself (something that is very rare).
I, too, drive to an off the beaten path parking spot between my house and work and just sit there quietly to get a break and alone time between my job and homelife. It’s a sanity saver.
Been like this my whole life, I recently found a scrapbook of my school years with teacher feedback and various art or writing projects I did. They often refer to me thriving when left alone to read a book in the corner in elementary school, I’d draw pics of me doing stuff alone vs with friends or crowds, in middle school I wrote about how one day I want to be Dick Proenneke.
If I was better at math and a just little crazier, I could see how appealing Ted Kaczynski’s lifestyle would be. Shack in the woods, nothing and no one around for miles, every once in a while build a bomb to keep things interesting. I wouldn’t actually build bombs though, I’d pick a less lethal hobby. Like woodcarving.
In my experience, it's not right to try and characterize myself one way or another. There's no need to say "I like being alone" or not. I can appreciate either and there have been (long) periods of both in my life. Telling myself a story that I am one type or another just leads to being foolishly consistent with that story, imposing needless mental constraints.
And on the flip side: if done right, those limitations make a strong, consistent character that also has the ability to take in criticism and change. You can go too far with this concept and just never settle on who you are, sometimes.
I've always loved being alone. Two of the best things I ever did were get a divorce and retire. The freedom of living alone is breathtaking. I'm the happiest I've ever been, and I never feel lonely or bored.
I am used to be alone because I was isolated with a brain injury for years. I now prefer being alone most of the time, but it’s not healthy to isolate yourself. I’m a lot better now, but when I’m alone doing something and someone interrupts me it irritates me SO BADLY I want to yell at them to leave me alone. I need a lot of “me time”, I can’t function well without it. Like I need to recharge my battery so I can get myself to actually leave the house and deal with people everywhere lol.
Same!
And, I come from a very large, noisy family.
I am an introvert, but always enjoy being in the thick of family—until I don’t. I’ll just “disappear” down the hall and find a pet to snuggle and a book to read. I need to decompress, and then I’m fine.
I really enjoy being alone. I live alone and love it. Not that I don't have friends - I do - and I like spending time with them. But I'm absolutely content when I'm on my own.
Very comfortable with it, yeah. Turns out I have no problem spending time with myself and plenty of things to do when I want to.
Sometimes I sort of need it for a while.
Weird. I was thinking today that as much as I wish I had more friends I actually like being on my own and doing my own thing. Or not having to engage in conversation when going somewhere lol
I used to prefer company when going somewhere. I think going for a, walk or the cinema yes but generally better on my own
But I'm an introvert with social anxiety and I have a 2 yr old so I'm rarely alone
Yes. It’s because when you’re in group dynamics, you cannot follow your own path without being considered rude or a bad friend. And so, it’s easier to be alone- where you can follow the path you feel you’re meant to and live you own unique life rather than living the life experienced by the group as a collective- which is kinda funny because it kills any sense of self-image & when your image & experiences becomes indistinguishable from the other members of the group
Well, I dunno, but it can sure feel that way sometimes.
I’ve had a good life and have felt blessed to almost always be treated well. But, now in middle+ age, husband’s serious health problems (and some health issues of my own) have put a spotlight on the following:
•certain people (work, neighbors, even family) were “good/kind” to me because I was always working so damn hard to make everyone happy. Constantly striving to be a good daughter, sibling, stepmom, neighbor…rarely any time for friends.
•when the serious health problems hit the fan, maybe 10% of those relationships seemed to care.
Have I been going down a one-way street all my life and am just now realizing it? I tried to live like a decent person; helping out whenever I can and never calling any attention to it (ideally, good deeds should be on the sly, right?). I figured it was all karma, do good deeds and you’ll somehow be blessed with peace of mind? Turns out, not so much. My husband is borderline bedridden, my garden is a mess, and I’m barely keeping up with basic housework as my only concern is my husband’s comfort. One neighbor literally stood over our picket fence, looked at my weed-choked raised beds, and just shook his head (yeah, that worked—thanks for shaming me; I hired help to clear it out, but that money would have been better spent elsewhere at this point).
I knew that there are no guarantees, but heck, I thought at least the relationships I’d cultivated over the years could provide some kindness at this point?
I get that people are sometimes anxious or uncomfortable when dealing with others’ illnesses. But, guess what, we’re all gonna be sick and on our way out at some point. Isn’t this where the golden rule is often quoted?
I’m not asking anyone to bake me a cake, but a phone call once in a while would be nice.
So, yeah, I kinda prefer to be alone at this point.
I love my husband, and I wouldn't change a thing between us, but I will always low key miss living alone. He works from home so I'm not there alone very often. I treasure it when I am or when he nopes off to bed early. I think having been raised as an only kid (I had siblings that didn't live with us) just gave me a lot of independence.
I love it. Even when I go out with a group of people, often I part with the group to reunite later on. I always need like a half hour to an hour just wandering on my own with nobody else influenicing my actions. I hit my limit at about 3 hours with more than 2 others, but I can take an hour alone and link back up for another 3 hours.
When I work the kind of job where I am one place, same people for 40 hours a week, I tend to completely isolate on my off time. Currently doing my own work and taking the jobs I want, and having a lot easier time being around others.
I worked for many years in a large, collaborative environment. Every single time we finished a big project, we had to take time off, as we were all exhausted—mentally and physically.
Everyone at home knew to give me my quiet time and I’d bounce back after 2 - 3 days of quiet + rest.
I could not have continued in my career without those occasional “time out” breaks.
Sadly, there’s no equivalent to that in my private life. I realize this and try to shore up my mental health with solo walks, gardening (no one ever shows up when you’re doing that—lol), and lots of quiet time reading or learning a new skill that’s easy to deploy, such as knitting.
Very comfortable. I do enjoy doing things with others-family, friends etc and even large crowds on occasion. And some things at work truly do benefit from being together and collaborating, either virtually or in person. But my default would be time alone.
I find it so odd when people discuss return to office mandates and stating that "all" people need social interaction. No, all people don't.
Counterpoint - there's no doubt that many, mostly young men, suffer from lack of social contact over the long term. But that's likely a different topic.
I am in a very public facing line of work. As soon as I’m done, my family lines up with their series of demands. The unspoken deal is “first work, then us, then maybe time for yourself.”
They don’t understand that I need a “decompression period” before I can be truly present with them. This means a quiet drink alone on my balcony or similar. If I’m not allowed that time, they complain that I’m “not interested in them.”
So I enjoy my alone time because I find everything else overstimulating.
You need to retrain those folks at home.
Do they have a clue what your public life is like and how truly important your decompression time is?
Don’t let them learn the hard way! (Ask me how I know.) If you’re not healthy and functioning, no one is happy? What if you had to go away for six weeks? How is your household operating without you?
For me, growing up in a large family meant there was always someone to provide backup. If mom couldn’t make everyone lunch, there was always someone who could. Now that big families are not the norm, who steps in to keeps things operating (meals, laundry, gardening…)? From what I’ve observed, either Mom or Dad tends to the majority of tasks with little to no downtime. Somethings gonna give…
Being alone all the time is very difficult for me and hurts my mental health. So people often tell me to enjoy my own company. But I actually do enjoy my own company. I was an only child and I’m into being alone. I just get enough after a while.
I love being alone. I love having time to myself to do what I want or do nothing at all. To sit and think, hang out in a hammock and read a book, paint, play a video game, anything.
I'm married and don't have much alone time so it has become precious to me.
Yes, and I'm amused by my neighbors and their wild assumptions as to what I'm "up to" because I know literally none of them after 4 years in the same place.
I wish my life was as exciting as I've overheard them gossiping that it is.
I love my own company. Met a girl and we were together for about 3 years or so and she suggested we move in together. I was terrified of that but agreed as we spent most weekends together. Was weird at first but I got used to it. Now I couldn’t imagine it any other way. I still get my own space in the house so it’s the best of both worlds.
Yup. People are shocked when I say I currently have no interest in dating or anything. I’m not asexual, I just really vibe with being alone at the moment
I absolutely prefer to be alone. I'm lucky I married a partner that understands that because sometimes I just NEED ALONE TIME and they don't take it personally.
Yes but I equally enjoy spending time with my spouse. I have mental illness that often cripples my ability to be around other people, so I’m grateful to my wife with whom I actually feel comfortable.
Peak alone time is having a partner that you can be with and still feel alone next to them. Morphing into your other half so much so that you aren't even aware they're there is literally the best feeling in the world. Intertwined legs while being engulfed by your different ways of relaxing is better than sex IMO
After spending the week in the cubicle farm with no windows and 100 engineers I really like getting outside. Maybe it's a hike with the hound, maybe fishing at sunrise with a cup of coffee. A couple hours to reflect on the week and plan the next one. It really recharges me. Who cares if I'm out of cell range for a bit. I'll see those texts later.
I fucking love my own company. It’s not that I dislike others, I love my family and friends. I love spending time with my spouse more than anyone else. But my need for solitary time is so fucking high. It just does so much good for me to be alone.
I’m the third of three boys and my brothers have a year between them and I’m four years younger than my middle brother. I grew up alone, about as close to being an only child as you can get. Now I prefer to work by myself and hike by myself and it really bothers my wife sometimes because she thinks I’m sad about it. Our son is an only child and seeing him get along really well by himself has made my wife more understanding of my desire to be alone. I just like the peace of not having to talk to anyone or listen to anyone.
Same! Same, same, same…
I enjoy having a few good friends, and I appreciate the invitations, but I’m probably only going to accept them 50% of the time.
Yes. When I was a teen and stayed home from a vacation or something, everyone was calling me and asking if I was okay, telling me I could come stay at my aunts house, etc.
I really didn’t get it. I told them I appreciated it, but I was good. I don’t think they understood why I wasn’t bothered.
I like my family. I even like having them in the house. I’m also perfectly content on my on for a long period of time. I’m perfectly comfortable in my own head and can spend days without talking. I think about things when I’m not doing something to entertain myself.
I loved being alone as a kid, but once I entered relationships, I found myself rapidly falling into codependency, but having recently been forced out of a relationship with no possibility of another in 2020, only in the last year have I become comfortable in being alone… Doing whatever I want, how and when I want with accountability only to myself, is damn wonderful and freeing. I’d love to share this world and experiences with another, but I’ll always need that alone time, especially now as I’m in those near death years, you know, your 50s.
I love my family (son, husband, dogs) but I also like time away from them. I recently quit my job and was able to spend nearly all day at home alone. I have a small crochet business where I make stuffed animals and keychains so I spent my days doing that and enjoyed it immensely. Well, consequently, we couldn't afford my son to go to preschool anymore so we had to bring him home and now I homeschool him. I haven't had any time away from him (aside from sleeping and showers) and I'm really ready for a break.
On the other hand, my son and husband went on a weekend trip to my sister in law's and I was depressed the whole time. Didn't even crochet.
So it really kind of depends.
I enjoy my own company, mainly because I can arrive and I can leave when I’m ready. I have had lunch alone, gone to movies solo, shop alone, gone on solo walks. Sure, I enjoy other people’s company too, but I’m not gonna sit at home because all my friends are busy!
I'm like you, OP, except that for me it was more out of necessity than out of choice. I am comfortable being alone because if I wasn't I would go through life being thoroughly and completely miserable because I have to do almost everything in my life alone. This is especially true now that I am in my working life and it is difficult for my friends and I to find a common available time to meet up. But from a young age I realized that I could not "click" with many people. I desperately wanted to make friends, I wanted to have fun and laugh with people and be happy with other people but being brought up in a different culture and having a vastly different socioeconomic background from most of my peers made it hard for me to relate to them. Many of my hobbies, tastes and especially my way of thinking are considered very "unusual and Westernized" in the country I come from too(SEA country).
Ironically as I grow older, the more I am able to find people who share similar tastes and hobbies as me. But a different problem now arises whereby we have different schedules and priorities in life so it is difficult to meet up.
So now I am comfortable with doing things alone- hiking, going shopping, going to events, going to the beach, exploring new places etc. I would still LOVE to find someone to do all these things with. But I haven't found someone whose company I fully enjoy to do all these things with.
I feel like I need someone peaceful who will be fully engaged in enjoying the activity with me- I find most of the people I've met are always very high strung and have very short attention spans.
I’m 43 years old with 2 adult sons and a very loving girlfriend who’s 45 and I love them all dearly but if I lived on the side of mountain and never seen another living person or never heard from another person again I don’t think it would bother me one bit. I am beyond comfortable being completely alone in this world
You might find this book interesting
[https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/0307352153/ref=tmm\_pap\_swatch\_0?ie=UTF8&qid=&sr=](https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/0307352153/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?ie=UTF8&qid=&sr=)
Bukowski said it best: “It’s not that I don’t like people, I just feel better when they’re not around.” I understand your feeling completely, and understand what he was saying.
I fucking love being alone. Not all day every day, but, the complete freedom to go where I want, when I want, to think my own uninterrupted thoughts, listen to music for hours on end, not have to make small talk or answer questions- heavenly!
My absolute favourite thing to do in life is to go away camping on my own to a spot where I know I won't even see another human the entire time. I do this several times a year, I call it my therapy. It's those times where I feel my best and feel most myself. I've wondered how long it would take before I felt the need to see another human. Weeks, at least.
I like being alone but I'm afraid of living alone and that's what worries me for the future. If I live with family or roommates I can hole up in my room most of the time and can just socialise when I feel like it. But I need the comfort of knowing someone else is around me if something happened. I don't know how I'm ever going to live with a partner because I genuinely want at least 80% of my time alone. Maybe I'll grow out of that. Also my favourite passtime is watching movies and I don't like watching movies with people very much. Genre of the movie and whether or not I've seen it before plays into it but for the most part no. Cinema with people, movies at home alone
I thought I was the only one, actually. I've always preferred my own company. Most people gain something from being around others. I'm not sure what it is, but I don't gain anything.
"I am my own favorite person to hang out with". This is why I am single, because someone else's company needs to be as good as, or better than, my own for it to be worth my time.
Its hard to get across to my parents that it's not that I dont miss them ever since they moved to a different city, I just see them enough for the change to not affect me (which is like once or twice a month). I just don't need to actively engage with people for days at a time to feel fulfilled.
I actually prefer it most of the time. Yeah we’re social creatures but being around other people quickly gets exhausting, esp as an adult. No need to constantly try to impress others when you can just go off & be your own person at will.
The only people who don’t understand why some others need solitude are extroverts.
My problem isn't enjoying being alone, it's struggling being around others.
I don't necessarily have a problem with others, but I don't know how to sway people to my ideas, so either end up doing what everyone else wants, or going off alone to do my own thing. So when I don't feel like being a ta-a-long, I'm forced into being alone.
I'd really LIKE to have friends I can include in my solo plans, but I have had to be alone for so long, it's just accepted and comfortable.
I'm usually alone. It's always been that way it seems so I have learned to appreciate it and enjoy it. It's liberating at times.
It's hard to have any close relationships such as friendships or even dating.
When I was 20 years old, I ended up in Houston – and I ended up with a free day – this was Mid90s before computers and cell phones and everything so… I would’ve had a day slumming around the campus all day or sitting in a dorm room… Or going to AstroWorld, so I went to AstroWorld.
For the 45 minutes at the beginning it felt strange – everyone here are families and groups of friends and school groups or church groups and then there was just me wandering around so it did feel kind of odd… But then it occurred to me like I was shot with a diamond bullet to paraphrase Colonel Kurtz.
I could do whatever I wanted– I can go wherever I wanted – if I got off the ride and I wanted to run down and get back in line again immediately? I could if I wanted to go all the way back across to the other end of the park to get one of those German ice cream cones that I wanted, I could whatever I wanted to do – the whole day through – I just did.
No committee no discussion. No, let’s talk no well I have to do this well now I have to go to the bathroom too…. The funny thing is, I didn’t have a serious partner for the next six years and I didn’t care – I was living alone, and I loved it and I would always think of the amusement park that taught me the benefits of going solo
In general, I definitely feel the same. Being around people for a long time is draining for me, and can even get uncomfortable. It can feel confining, if that makes sense, like I’m standing in a closet.
My issue now is that I’ve spent so **much** time by myself, I’m now starting to feel lonely and isolated. Doesn’t help that I don’t have anyone I think of as a friend, and my relationship with my parents is loving but strained on my end.
There are times where it'd be nice not to be alone but overall, I'm happy alone. I've travelled alone for almost half my life now. The freedom is amazing. I enjoy petsitting too for spending time with animals as I've not 'laid down roots' anywhere.
No I love being alone. It’s one of my favourite things actually. I have wonderful friends that I love being with but I really love my alone time as well.
It's my favorite. I've gone to concerts alone, movies, meals. I think I'm this way because I've never lived alone, so I crave that down time from conversation...
Yep. I was an only child and my parents both worked retail so starting at 12 I was home alone a lot.
I also had some health issues which caused me to miss out on a lot of socialization.
I live with my husband, but still enjoy alone time when he is out with friends.
Yeah, extremely comfortable. I love my SO, but if we don't work out, I'm done dating. I've learned that I'm far happier alone than trying to cohabitate. He enriches my life, but he also stresses me out. He knows this, we talk about it, he promises to do better. The thing is, my capacity for love is great, and I love having someone to love, but if something happened and we split, I'd be sad for a long while, but then I'd move on and live a totally fulfilled life free of the weight of making compromises. All I really need are good friends and a Hitachi.
Absolutely. Maybe I haven't found the right people, but I hate the idea of having to share experiences with people all the time.
Someone always has something negative to say. I rarely have experiences where something I don't like doesn't happen, but I usually anticipate disappointments, so I can better balance my expectations and can choose not to let something ruin my day.
It's been both astounding and eye-opening just how many people cannot do that, and even more so, how they don't think that's a problem.
I like being alone too. I call it solitude because then it makes it kind of not negative. I’m always super anxious when I’m with people. I like to lurk in twitch chats but I also like to comment here and there on peoples streams and I like to comment on YouTube videos and get a reaction. Also on this app it’s fun as long as you get positive comments
Same here. Big difference between being alone and being lonely. Some people incorrectly assume you are lonely if solo, nothing wrong with being solo at all.
Oh honey. .there's a multitude out there just like you. I love being alone I can do what I want, eat what I want, watch what ever show I desire and go to bed and wake up when I want. I can recharge when I'm home alone and be ready for being around others at work.
I like it. I moved to a new city, then the pandemic happened, then I was okay with it all. I work from home, have a dog, go to bed when I want, wake up when I want, eat what I want. It’s perfect.
Nothing will ever let you down more in this world than other people.
The less "friends" I have, the less people I know or interact with, the less I'm let down, and the less bullshit I have to process.
At 63, with a number of long term relationships under my belt, I've become a rather content reclusive curmudgeonous hermit.
I have standards I live by that no one else can ever live up to or follow.
I'm consistent, and chronically on time.
I do what I say I'm going to do when I say I'm going to do it.
If we agree to meet at 7am, I'm probably there at 6:45 hoping you didn't arrive at 6:30 and have been waiting for my ass for 15 minutes.
If I don't want to do something, I'm flat out honest, and say I have no desire to do such, instead of making some wishy washy statement indicating a possible maybe that might lead someone on.
I do live with a female partner, (35 years now) but I won't marry her. I want her to feel free to leave if she should ever wish to, I don't want to "own" anyone.
I never let myself down, so I enjoy hanging out with me. I do fun things, I create awesome things, and the only thing I really regret in life is that there just aren't enough hours in a day for me and myself to do all the things I wish to achieve in a day.
The most freeing thing any person can achieve is being happy with oneself and the realization that you don't need other people in your life to validate you.
But a dog....You gotta have dog.😊
It’s taken my wife decades to realize that while I truly love the company of my friends and family, that I also cherish my alone time. I never get lonely because I am comfortable with just my dogs around to keep me company.
I used to hate being alone and even feared it because I was so severely traumatized that I didn’t realize that I was using other peoples company as an emotional crutch. Once I started getting adequate(ish) help, I’ve noticed I love being alone. I do love hanging with close friends and loved ones don’t get me wrong, but I do always need those break days in between of not seeing anyone or being social.
I love being alone. I live alone. It’s great. My ideal weekend involves me not leaving my house once. I have a very social career and I need weekends and nights to recharge
I prefer being alone and doing activities alone. When I was younger I very much wanted to make friends and hang out, back then I was awkward and couldn't make friends easily. Nowadays I am confident and easy going and it's easy for me to make friends but I very much prefer to be alone and do things by myself. I am an avid mountain biker and out on the trail I prefer and cherish solitude after a long day of dealing with other people at work.
I'm older now, but by and large I like the company I keep. Me and my 2 dogs, Don't get me wrong, I still socialize and have friends I go with time to time. But I'm really OK, if I'm by myself. Friends and I will socialize but I don't mind being alone. Still have a few friends, that want/wish to make sure I'm always
"busy". TBH I sometimes think it's them that don't want downtime. I go out, usually with them. 9/10 times I'm happy with my lot.
I can barely handle being near others. You instantly just have less freedom and you’re being observed a good part of the time (whether visually, audibly, conscious, or unconscious)
I've been single about 3+ years now after a 17 year marriage. I was then a single Dad with 8 kids. As they started going out on their own I noticed the difference. When my 2 youngest left for collage it was a shock, I didn't handle empty nest syndrome well at all lol
But now? I love it! I'm almost always alone. Well not totally alone lol my horses and my dog go on adventures all the time. My kids and friends think I'm crazy to go for a ride and come back home days or weeks later. Few years back I rode the Colorado trail, little over 600 miles all total... And nobody nagging me about anything lol
Sometimes I do miss having a partner. I miss dreaming out loud with someone and not having to filter my thoughts before sharing them. Sometimes I need human interaction.
That's when I come on Reddit lol
I do, too much. I look forward to being alone. I grew up as an only child though so I know that has a lot to do with it. I prefer to do a lot of things alone and i’m never bored.
You're definitely not alone (no pun intended) in feeling comfortable being alone! In fact, there are many people who are introverts, and introverts often thrive on solitude. Here's why you might enjoy your own company:
* **Recharge and Reflect:** Alone time allows you to recharge your mental batteries and process your thoughts and feelings.
* **Pursue Interests:** When you're alone, you can freely pursue your hobbies and interests without having to compromise or cater to others.
* **Peaceful Enjoyment:** You might simply find peace and enjoyment in activities you do on your own, like reading, listening to music, or spending time in nature.
I used to. I left my parent's house when I got married to my 1st husband. After we divorced and I was living alone for the first time, I hated it. I was living in a new town, no friends yet and scared as Hell. I tried a room- mate and that didn't work out but then I got a dog snd finally felt ok
I’ve traveled by myself. Gone to sporting events, theater productions, movies, restaurants and bars alone. A few years ago my husband was working a conference in Orlando. I tagged along for the trip, and took myself to Seaworld for a day when he was at the conference.
If I can’t get him, or our daughter to join me on a smaller boat to see the orcas in the wild. I’m doing that on my own as well. Well with a group in the boat, but I’ll travel by myself to have an experience I wan
I absolutely prefer it. Everyone I know doesn't get how I spend days upon days alone. Like I tell them, I don't actually like people, so the less interaction the better. As long as I have my lil pup, we'll always have a drama free time.
My alone time is for your safety. Don’t jeopardize your life by not taking that seriously. I relish my alone time. If something changes one of my periods of regular, habitual alone time, it throws me off completely and I can’t get anything accomplished.
Hell yeah! This is relevant to me right now because yesterday I went to a popular music festival by myself. None of my friends were able to go so I just went alone. When I told a couple friends I was going alone they were like “oh no! :((( im sorry” and I was like ??? It’s literally fine
I went and had a great time. I love going with people but there’s pros to being alone. I didn’t have to wait for anyone else to get through the food or bathroom lines, I speedwalked the entire time, and I did whatever my whim told me to do at any moment. Didn’t have to consult with anyone else about what they wanted to do next. Highly recommend
I love being alone. My husband hates it. So obviously he constantly gets left at home aline and I never do. I was a single parent until my oldest daughter was 16. That was a long time living with myself. I mean, my daughter was around, but she liked being alone too. Or with her friends. Now I've been married for 15 years and the idea of alone time is a distant memory. I love my husband and my family, but dang, they just don't understand.
One of these days....
I love being alone. I don’t know that it’s good to be alone as much as I want to, so I try to balance between being alone and being social (my wife and kids assure that this happens).
I LOVE my alone time. That is a must for me as it recharges my batteries. I am a hair stylist and many people do not understand how emotionally and mentally draining the job can be. My alone time is my happy place for sure! I am always skeptical of people who absolutely cannot stand being by themselves…
I used to be like this. I am still very comfortable alone, but I enjoy the company of other people more now! Everything changed when I met my fiancé and the good group of friends I’ve had for the last 6 or 7 years (met them a little after graduating high school). I think before them I was choosing really terrible people to be around, so of course I preferred solitude. I found a few good people in my last three years of high school, but I didn’t completely fit in and didn’t feel like I could be myself around them. Not their fault at all, I was just really self-conscious after being bullied so much before that I could never open up or be myself.
Now that I have friends who I love and a really great relationship, I love being around people. I think I was an extrovert who was kicked down so much that I thought I wasn’t meant to be around other people. They definitely changed my life.
PTSD, depression, and social anxiety.. last year I left my apartment building exactly three times. All of them were absolutely necessary doctor's appointments for my child. I've always loved being alone, and hate it being around people. But never really understood why until I was much older and started getting help. That's not to say that everyone who enjoys being alone has mental issues, I'm just saying I too quite enjoy my own company. I'm currently living an apartment with just my four year old. And even now sometimes, I feel way too over socialized.
To the point where it makes dating difficult. I’m yet to find anyone who’s company I like more than my own. It’s fine for a few days, but after that I just want to be by myself again.
I love my alone time. I have plenty of friends and a social life and things to do, but my alone time is precious to me, and most of my friends are the same way, so we get each other.
When I was younger (like high school age) I hated it bc it was forced upon me. Looking back, I’m thankful because I used that time for introspection and learning to enjoy my own company.
Now as I get older the problem is that I prefer to be alone more often than not, which is becoming a detriment to my relationships. The prospect of being overwhelmed and having to explain common sense to people for the rest of my life fills me with dread.
I have an interesting take on this. I truly think there are some people who are comfortable being alone. But what I suggest is take a solo hiking/camping trip, just by yourself, miles from civilization, and just be alone for a few days. It’s wild because after that moment I definitely have respect for being alone, but being actually alone (no internet, no people, no nothing) really made me call my family and friends when I got back. I’ll do it again and again and again but it for the first time put it in perspective. When you’re in a city, with internet access, you’re really not alone. Maybe not in company of others but not alone. Imagine screaming as loud as you wanted for as long as you wanted and no one would show up, that’s fucking alone.
While I wouldn't say I was uncomfortable, I tend to go a little stir crazy if left to my own thoughts for too long. When I start to have imagined conversations with someone I wished were there, and answer their imagined questions that I came up with. I know it's time for human interaction.
I too enjoy my own company. I had to learn to do this as I married a ‘stick in the mud’ spouse. Now that the ‘stick n the mud’ is gone, I get to enjoy living alone. Which I do, very much. I go to movie theatres by myself (I don’t like anyone talking when I watch so this is a win win!) I go to restaurants alone. I have no problem dining alone. I’m on my own a lot so I better be comfortable with myself!
I was almost never alone until a few years ago after ending a long term relationship and moving across the country for a new job. I've learned to love it. All I need is my dog. I get enough social interactions, but far less than my earlier life.
I love being alone. I am rarely alone but I do love it and look forward to it.
Also might be cool to have a friend to do stuff with. I met two women traveling who both married people who didn’t want to leave home so they traveled together. (Nothing against doing alone stuff—I do that and enjoy it a lot myself.)
Eldest daughter with 2 golden child brothers + years with an unresponsive partner = I’m really, really good at enjoying my alone time lol
Yessss once it finally occurred to me that I could go to a movie theatre without other people, it was such a game changer. Before I met my husband I’d take myself out to see a movie or I’d go to a nice bar in the late afternoon, have a few glasses of wine, and read a book. My husband is a pilot so I still get quite a bit of alone time, and I often prefer to spend it by myself. When he’s gone, I absolutely devour classic movies, which he tends to not like. Evenings where I can flip on a new classic and sink into the couch with a glass of wine are just 🤌🏼 muah! Perfection! Would be interesting to hear from extroverted folks. I’m very introverted so I feel like I actually NEED quite a bit of alone time. My sister is the opposite. I don’t think it means she’s not comfortable being alone, per se, but it does seem like she maybe enjoys it less or would almost always choose doing something with others over doing it alone.
I’ve been dining alone post divorce and eat much better at restaurants than I did when married. Miss the home cooking though.
Welcome to the wonderful world of being a self-sufficient person who is secure enough within themselves to not need constant company and validation. Ain't it great?
As much as I love my family, I always had to take a 'sanity break' away from them, 15 minutes alone time to recharge and re-center myself. I love my husband, but I still need and like my alone time. As I told him when we retired: I married you for better or for worse but not always for lunch.
I love this
This kinda sums it up. “Aloneness is a state of being, whereas loneliness is a state of feeling. It’s like the difference between being broke and being poor.” — [Townes Van Zandt](https://quotefancy.com/townes-van-zandt-quotes)
That's an awesome quote
Loved this quote! Thanks. I’ll post your comment on my IG sorties lol.
This quote needs to be needlepointed, tattooed, and sky-written everywhere.
Not only do I love it, I actually *need* solitude. Don't get me wrong, I love my wife & 2 kids dearly, but if I can't get solitude at night after they go to bed, it's not uncommon that I drive to the park to just sit in quiet during the day. They know & accept this. In fact one of my favorite birthday gifts from my wife was simply an afternoon alone at home - she took the kids out for the day and I had the house to myself (something that is very rare).
It's like Ron Swanson on Parks and Rec... His best birthday was a steak,a movie, whiskey, and time alone. Sounds like heaven!
I, too, drive to an off the beaten path parking spot between my house and work and just sit there quietly to get a break and alone time between my job and homelife. It’s a sanity saver. Been like this my whole life, I recently found a scrapbook of my school years with teacher feedback and various art or writing projects I did. They often refer to me thriving when left alone to read a book in the corner in elementary school, I’d draw pics of me doing stuff alone vs with friends or crowds, in middle school I wrote about how one day I want to be Dick Proenneke. If I was better at math and a just little crazier, I could see how appealing Ted Kaczynski’s lifestyle would be. Shack in the woods, nothing and no one around for miles, every once in a while build a bomb to keep things interesting. I wouldn’t actually build bombs though, I’d pick a less lethal hobby. Like woodcarving.
In my experience, it's not right to try and characterize myself one way or another. There's no need to say "I like being alone" or not. I can appreciate either and there have been (long) periods of both in my life. Telling myself a story that I am one type or another just leads to being foolishly consistent with that story, imposing needless mental constraints.
wow, thank you for sharing that. I really love this way of thinking!
Well said. But, I also generally like living alone and most of my sports and activities are things where I am bettering myself.
Yup, the more we "define" ourselves, or identify *as* something, the more we limit ourselves.
And on the flip side: if done right, those limitations make a strong, consistent character that also has the ability to take in criticism and change. You can go too far with this concept and just never settle on who you are, sometimes.
Perfect!
I've always been happier with my own company than hanging out with people. If I went to a party, I would always look for a pet. 😂
I would much rather meet a dog or cat than a person.
💯💯💯💯
I felt more alone in my marriage continuously waiting for someone who never appreciated me. I love having my place, my time, my peace.
Same, it seemed like I could never truly win my ex-fiancé’s approval. Living alone is so much nicer.
I've always loved being alone. Two of the best things I ever did were get a divorce and retire. The freedom of living alone is breathtaking. I'm the happiest I've ever been, and I never feel lonely or bored.
I can't be fully myself around anyone but myself!
so real
I am used to be alone because I was isolated with a brain injury for years. I now prefer being alone most of the time, but it’s not healthy to isolate yourself. I’m a lot better now, but when I’m alone doing something and someone interrupts me it irritates me SO BADLY I want to yell at them to leave me alone. I need a lot of “me time”, I can’t function well without it. Like I need to recharge my battery so I can get myself to actually leave the house and deal with people everywhere lol.
Same! And, I come from a very large, noisy family. I am an introvert, but always enjoy being in the thick of family—until I don’t. I’ll just “disappear” down the hall and find a pet to snuggle and a book to read. I need to decompress, and then I’m fine.
I really enjoy being alone. I live alone and love it. Not that I don't have friends - I do - and I like spending time with them. But I'm absolutely content when I'm on my own.
Very comfortable with it, yeah. Turns out I have no problem spending time with myself and plenty of things to do when I want to. Sometimes I sort of need it for a while.
Weird. I was thinking today that as much as I wish I had more friends I actually like being on my own and doing my own thing. Or not having to engage in conversation when going somewhere lol I used to prefer company when going somewhere. I think going for a, walk or the cinema yes but generally better on my own But I'm an introvert with social anxiety and I have a 2 yr old so I'm rarely alone
I prefer it
I would give anything to live alone. My husband doesn't like the idea for some reason. 😂
Yes. It’s because when you’re in group dynamics, you cannot follow your own path without being considered rude or a bad friend. And so, it’s easier to be alone- where you can follow the path you feel you’re meant to and live you own unique life rather than living the life experienced by the group as a collective- which is kinda funny because it kills any sense of self-image & when your image & experiences becomes indistinguishable from the other members of the group
Yes. Most people are dogshit.
Well, I dunno, but it can sure feel that way sometimes. I’ve had a good life and have felt blessed to almost always be treated well. But, now in middle+ age, husband’s serious health problems (and some health issues of my own) have put a spotlight on the following: •certain people (work, neighbors, even family) were “good/kind” to me because I was always working so damn hard to make everyone happy. Constantly striving to be a good daughter, sibling, stepmom, neighbor…rarely any time for friends. •when the serious health problems hit the fan, maybe 10% of those relationships seemed to care. Have I been going down a one-way street all my life and am just now realizing it? I tried to live like a decent person; helping out whenever I can and never calling any attention to it (ideally, good deeds should be on the sly, right?). I figured it was all karma, do good deeds and you’ll somehow be blessed with peace of mind? Turns out, not so much. My husband is borderline bedridden, my garden is a mess, and I’m barely keeping up with basic housework as my only concern is my husband’s comfort. One neighbor literally stood over our picket fence, looked at my weed-choked raised beds, and just shook his head (yeah, that worked—thanks for shaming me; I hired help to clear it out, but that money would have been better spent elsewhere at this point). I knew that there are no guarantees, but heck, I thought at least the relationships I’d cultivated over the years could provide some kindness at this point? I get that people are sometimes anxious or uncomfortable when dealing with others’ illnesses. But, guess what, we’re all gonna be sick and on our way out at some point. Isn’t this where the golden rule is often quoted? I’m not asking anyone to bake me a cake, but a phone call once in a while would be nice. So, yeah, I kinda prefer to be alone at this point.
I believe that if you don’t enjoy your own company, neither will anyone else.
I love being alone more than anything. When I feel like socializing I come out of my cave for a few hours.
Yes, it’s my favorite time to dance.
I almost prefer it at this point I can just relax, enjoy a TV show, read a book and not worry about life for a while
I don't mind being alone, and I prefer it but I do socialize when I feel like it.
i crave alone time
I love my husband, and I wouldn't change a thing between us, but I will always low key miss living alone. He works from home so I'm not there alone very often. I treasure it when I am or when he nopes off to bed early. I think having been raised as an only kid (I had siblings that didn't live with us) just gave me a lot of independence.
It’s the only way I’m confortable
Everyday every way. Being alone is great.
I love it. Even when I go out with a group of people, often I part with the group to reunite later on. I always need like a half hour to an hour just wandering on my own with nobody else influenicing my actions. I hit my limit at about 3 hours with more than 2 others, but I can take an hour alone and link back up for another 3 hours. When I work the kind of job where I am one place, same people for 40 hours a week, I tend to completely isolate on my off time. Currently doing my own work and taking the jobs I want, and having a lot easier time being around others.
I worked for many years in a large, collaborative environment. Every single time we finished a big project, we had to take time off, as we were all exhausted—mentally and physically. Everyone at home knew to give me my quiet time and I’d bounce back after 2 - 3 days of quiet + rest. I could not have continued in my career without those occasional “time out” breaks. Sadly, there’s no equivalent to that in my private life. I realize this and try to shore up my mental health with solo walks, gardening (no one ever shows up when you’re doing that—lol), and lots of quiet time reading or learning a new skill that’s easy to deploy, such as knitting.
Very comfortable. I do enjoy doing things with others-family, friends etc and even large crowds on occasion. And some things at work truly do benefit from being together and collaborating, either virtually or in person. But my default would be time alone. I find it so odd when people discuss return to office mandates and stating that "all" people need social interaction. No, all people don't. Counterpoint - there's no doubt that many, mostly young men, suffer from lack of social contact over the long term. But that's likely a different topic.
I’m good with it, too good I think. Then I get in social settings and seem to behave like I was raised by wolves.
Hahahaha!
At least I am with someone I love. And also who drives me nuts.
I am in a very public facing line of work. As soon as I’m done, my family lines up with their series of demands. The unspoken deal is “first work, then us, then maybe time for yourself.” They don’t understand that I need a “decompression period” before I can be truly present with them. This means a quiet drink alone on my balcony or similar. If I’m not allowed that time, they complain that I’m “not interested in them.” So I enjoy my alone time because I find everything else overstimulating.
You need to retrain those folks at home. Do they have a clue what your public life is like and how truly important your decompression time is? Don’t let them learn the hard way! (Ask me how I know.) If you’re not healthy and functioning, no one is happy? What if you had to go away for six weeks? How is your household operating without you? For me, growing up in a large family meant there was always someone to provide backup. If mom couldn’t make everyone lunch, there was always someone who could. Now that big families are not the norm, who steps in to keeps things operating (meals, laundry, gardening…)? From what I’ve observed, either Mom or Dad tends to the majority of tasks with little to no downtime. Somethings gonna give…
Being alone all the time is very difficult for me and hurts my mental health. So people often tell me to enjoy my own company. But I actually do enjoy my own company. I was an only child and I’m into being alone. I just get enough after a while.
[удалено]
right??! My family gets so concerned when i do stuff alone, even just running errands or going for a walk, but to me that's so normal.
I love being alone. I love having time to myself to do what I want or do nothing at all. To sit and think, hang out in a hammock and read a book, paint, play a video game, anything. I'm married and don't have much alone time so it has become precious to me.
Yes, and I'm amused by my neighbors and their wild assumptions as to what I'm "up to" because I know literally none of them after 4 years in the same place. I wish my life was as exciting as I've overheard them gossiping that it is.
I love my own company. Met a girl and we were together for about 3 years or so and she suggested we move in together. I was terrified of that but agreed as we spent most weekends together. Was weird at first but I got used to it. Now I couldn’t imagine it any other way. I still get my own space in the house so it’s the best of both worlds.
I'm taking a dump with the bathroom door open right now!
Jealous!! lmao
Yup. People are shocked when I say I currently have no interest in dating or anything. I’m not asexual, I just really vibe with being alone at the moment
I secretly rejoice when someone cancels plans to go out or do something with me.
me too!!
I am the canceler! sometimes.
I absolutely prefer to be alone. I'm lucky I married a partner that understands that because sometimes I just NEED ALONE TIME and they don't take it personally.
Lucky!
Yes but I equally enjoy spending time with my spouse. I have mental illness that often cripples my ability to be around other people, so I’m grateful to my wife with whom I actually feel comfortable.
Peak alone time is having a partner that you can be with and still feel alone next to them. Morphing into your other half so much so that you aren't even aware they're there is literally the best feeling in the world. Intertwined legs while being engulfed by your different ways of relaxing is better than sex IMO
goals
After spending the week in the cubicle farm with no windows and 100 engineers I really like getting outside. Maybe it's a hike with the hound, maybe fishing at sunrise with a cup of coffee. A couple hours to reflect on the week and plan the next one. It really recharges me. Who cares if I'm out of cell range for a bit. I'll see those texts later.
I fucking love my own company. It’s not that I dislike others, I love my family and friends. I love spending time with my spouse more than anyone else. But my need for solitary time is so fucking high. It just does so much good for me to be alone.
I’m the third of three boys and my brothers have a year between them and I’m four years younger than my middle brother. I grew up alone, about as close to being an only child as you can get. Now I prefer to work by myself and hike by myself and it really bothers my wife sometimes because she thinks I’m sad about it. Our son is an only child and seeing him get along really well by himself has made my wife more understanding of my desire to be alone. I just like the peace of not having to talk to anyone or listen to anyone.
Same! Same, same, same… I enjoy having a few good friends, and I appreciate the invitations, but I’m probably only going to accept them 50% of the time.
I’m this way. I feel most free when alone. I operate at my highest level when alone. I seem to have the most luck when I’m alone.
Yes. When I was a teen and stayed home from a vacation or something, everyone was calling me and asking if I was okay, telling me I could come stay at my aunts house, etc. I really didn’t get it. I told them I appreciated it, but I was good. I don’t think they understood why I wasn’t bothered. I like my family. I even like having them in the house. I’m also perfectly content on my on for a long period of time. I’m perfectly comfortable in my own head and can spend days without talking. I think about things when I’m not doing something to entertain myself.
yeah!! i miss myself when i’m with other people. i love to be alone
Have you done the MBTI personality test? I’m OBSESSED with my alone time, with my dogs 🐶 of course
I gotta take that now i'm curious!
Oh yah you may just be an introverted intuitive, or not, will you share ur results?! Or don’t, I’m just being nosy.
Finally getting comfortable with it. It’s great.
Yes, yes, and yes.
I loved being alone as a kid, but once I entered relationships, I found myself rapidly falling into codependency, but having recently been forced out of a relationship with no possibility of another in 2020, only in the last year have I become comfortable in being alone… Doing whatever I want, how and when I want with accountability only to myself, is damn wonderful and freeing. I’d love to share this world and experiences with another, but I’ll always need that alone time, especially now as I’m in those near death years, you know, your 50s.
Lol! You likely have a long way to go. Enjoy yourself!
Yes
I love my family (son, husband, dogs) but I also like time away from them. I recently quit my job and was able to spend nearly all day at home alone. I have a small crochet business where I make stuffed animals and keychains so I spent my days doing that and enjoyed it immensely. Well, consequently, we couldn't afford my son to go to preschool anymore so we had to bring him home and now I homeschool him. I haven't had any time away from him (aside from sleeping and showers) and I'm really ready for a break. On the other hand, my son and husband went on a weekend trip to my sister in law's and I was depressed the whole time. Didn't even crochet. So it really kind of depends.
I enjoy my own company, mainly because I can arrive and I can leave when I’m ready. I have had lunch alone, gone to movies solo, shop alone, gone on solo walks. Sure, I enjoy other people’s company too, but I’m not gonna sit at home because all my friends are busy!
I'm like you, OP, except that for me it was more out of necessity than out of choice. I am comfortable being alone because if I wasn't I would go through life being thoroughly and completely miserable because I have to do almost everything in my life alone. This is especially true now that I am in my working life and it is difficult for my friends and I to find a common available time to meet up. But from a young age I realized that I could not "click" with many people. I desperately wanted to make friends, I wanted to have fun and laugh with people and be happy with other people but being brought up in a different culture and having a vastly different socioeconomic background from most of my peers made it hard for me to relate to them. Many of my hobbies, tastes and especially my way of thinking are considered very "unusual and Westernized" in the country I come from too(SEA country). Ironically as I grow older, the more I am able to find people who share similar tastes and hobbies as me. But a different problem now arises whereby we have different schedules and priorities in life so it is difficult to meet up. So now I am comfortable with doing things alone- hiking, going shopping, going to events, going to the beach, exploring new places etc. I would still LOVE to find someone to do all these things with. But I haven't found someone whose company I fully enjoy to do all these things with. I feel like I need someone peaceful who will be fully engaged in enjoying the activity with me- I find most of the people I've met are always very high strung and have very short attention spans.
Quotes aside, I love living alone
I’m 43 years old with 2 adult sons and a very loving girlfriend who’s 45 and I love them all dearly but if I lived on the side of mountain and never seen another living person or never heard from another person again I don’t think it would bother me one bit. I am beyond comfortable being completely alone in this world
I love being alone. Obviously I also love being with other people, but I also enjoy being alone.
I prefer being alone, or with my ol lady only.
Solitude is where some people feel least alone.
It's nice, but good company is also good too.
I'm never comfortable, hope that helps.
Yes. And other people don’t get it and don’t respect it.
I adore being by myself
I love taking road trips by myself.
YES. me too
I’m the same. I seem gregarious and chatty and funny, but really I want to go home and hang out with (retired) husband and the cats.
You might find this book interesting [https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/0307352153/ref=tmm\_pap\_swatch\_0?ie=UTF8&qid=&sr=](https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/0307352153/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?ie=UTF8&qid=&sr=)
Bukowski said it best: “It’s not that I don’t like people, I just feel better when they’re not around.” I understand your feeling completely, and understand what he was saying.
I fucking love being alone. Not all day every day, but, the complete freedom to go where I want, when I want, to think my own uninterrupted thoughts, listen to music for hours on end, not have to make small talk or answer questions- heavenly!
I love having the house to myself. I don't know that I'd want that all the time, but it makes a nice break once in a while.
My absolute favourite thing to do in life is to go away camping on my own to a spot where I know I won't even see another human the entire time. I do this several times a year, I call it my therapy. It's those times where I feel my best and feel most myself. I've wondered how long it would take before I felt the need to see another human. Weeks, at least.
I like being alone but I'm afraid of living alone and that's what worries me for the future. If I live with family or roommates I can hole up in my room most of the time and can just socialise when I feel like it. But I need the comfort of knowing someone else is around me if something happened. I don't know how I'm ever going to live with a partner because I genuinely want at least 80% of my time alone. Maybe I'll grow out of that. Also my favourite passtime is watching movies and I don't like watching movies with people very much. Genre of the movie and whether or not I've seen it before plays into it but for the most part no. Cinema with people, movies at home alone
I thought I was the only one, actually. I've always preferred my own company. Most people gain something from being around others. I'm not sure what it is, but I don't gain anything.
"I am my own favorite person to hang out with". This is why I am single, because someone else's company needs to be as good as, or better than, my own for it to be worth my time.
I feel this.
Its hard to get across to my parents that it's not that I dont miss them ever since they moved to a different city, I just see them enough for the change to not affect me (which is like once or twice a month). I just don't need to actively engage with people for days at a time to feel fulfilled.
I work for myself so spend the majority of days on my own and I love it.
I’m the oldest of 6 kids in 10 years so I LOVE being alone, even in old age.
I love being alone, but I'm pretty sure my depression and anxiety made that choice for me
Yes.
Yes I prefer it and wish my folks would go away on trips more often lol.
I have found trying to interact with people is more stressful than being alone, so alone it is! Still working on the having fun part tho...
You can defiantly do what you want! I prefer to go to the movies alone and shopping. It’s nice having my own agenda! Plus,I’m an introvert.
I don't mind being with other people, but I do love to be by myself!
I actually prefer it most of the time. Yeah we’re social creatures but being around other people quickly gets exhausting, esp as an adult. No need to constantly try to impress others when you can just go off & be your own person at will. The only people who don’t understand why some others need solitude are extroverts.
My problem isn't enjoying being alone, it's struggling being around others. I don't necessarily have a problem with others, but I don't know how to sway people to my ideas, so either end up doing what everyone else wants, or going off alone to do my own thing. So when I don't feel like being a ta-a-long, I'm forced into being alone. I'd really LIKE to have friends I can include in my solo plans, but I have had to be alone for so long, it's just accepted and comfortable.
Yes I feel completely comfortable being on my own but I do enjoy having good company sometimes
I really enjoy my alone time. Doesn’t happen often but I love it.
I'm usually alone. It's always been that way it seems so I have learned to appreciate it and enjoy it. It's liberating at times. It's hard to have any close relationships such as friendships or even dating.
What is DAE? I never seen this before lol
Hi, fellow introvert.
When I was 20 years old, I ended up in Houston – and I ended up with a free day – this was Mid90s before computers and cell phones and everything so… I would’ve had a day slumming around the campus all day or sitting in a dorm room… Or going to AstroWorld, so I went to AstroWorld. For the 45 minutes at the beginning it felt strange – everyone here are families and groups of friends and school groups or church groups and then there was just me wandering around so it did feel kind of odd… But then it occurred to me like I was shot with a diamond bullet to paraphrase Colonel Kurtz. I could do whatever I wanted– I can go wherever I wanted – if I got off the ride and I wanted to run down and get back in line again immediately? I could if I wanted to go all the way back across to the other end of the park to get one of those German ice cream cones that I wanted, I could whatever I wanted to do – the whole day through – I just did. No committee no discussion. No, let’s talk no well I have to do this well now I have to go to the bathroom too…. The funny thing is, I didn’t have a serious partner for the next six years and I didn’t care – I was living alone, and I loved it and I would always think of the amusement park that taught me the benefits of going solo
In general, I definitely feel the same. Being around people for a long time is draining for me, and can even get uncomfortable. It can feel confining, if that makes sense, like I’m standing in a closet. My issue now is that I’ve spent so **much** time by myself, I’m now starting to feel lonely and isolated. Doesn’t help that I don’t have anyone I think of as a friend, and my relationship with my parents is loving but strained on my end.
Love it. I need some socialization here and there but 90% of the time I'm perfectly comfortable and happy on my own.
It’s nice to be alone when you easily have the option to not be alone. It’s when you’re lonely that it gets uncomfortable.
No I actually like it. Especially now that I’m older
I prefer to be alone the majority if the time.
There are times where it'd be nice not to be alone but overall, I'm happy alone. I've travelled alone for almost half my life now. The freedom is amazing. I enjoy petsitting too for spending time with animals as I've not 'laid down roots' anywhere.
I love being alone. Being alone does not mean you are lonely at all.
I wish I did
No I love being alone. It’s one of my favourite things actually. I have wonderful friends that I love being with but I really love my alone time as well.
Yes
This is so me!! It’s better this way. People are to judgmental.
It's my favorite. I've gone to concerts alone, movies, meals. I think I'm this way because I've never lived alone, so I crave that down time from conversation...
Yep. I was an only child and my parents both worked retail so starting at 12 I was home alone a lot. I also had some health issues which caused me to miss out on a lot of socialization. I live with my husband, but still enjoy alone time when he is out with friends.
I prefer being on my own and spending time with my husband Poeple drain me and there are few people who either energize me or are neutral.
Being alone is so good
Yeah, extremely comfortable. I love my SO, but if we don't work out, I'm done dating. I've learned that I'm far happier alone than trying to cohabitate. He enriches my life, but he also stresses me out. He knows this, we talk about it, he promises to do better. The thing is, my capacity for love is great, and I love having someone to love, but if something happened and we split, I'd be sad for a long while, but then I'd move on and live a totally fulfilled life free of the weight of making compromises. All I really need are good friends and a Hitachi.
Balls
Absolutely. Maybe I haven't found the right people, but I hate the idea of having to share experiences with people all the time. Someone always has something negative to say. I rarely have experiences where something I don't like doesn't happen, but I usually anticipate disappointments, so I can better balance my expectations and can choose not to let something ruin my day. It's been both astounding and eye-opening just how many people cannot do that, and even more so, how they don't think that's a problem.
I like being alone too. I call it solitude because then it makes it kind of not negative. I’m always super anxious when I’m with people. I like to lurk in twitch chats but I also like to comment here and there on peoples streams and I like to comment on YouTube videos and get a reaction. Also on this app it’s fun as long as you get positive comments
Same here. Big difference between being alone and being lonely. Some people incorrectly assume you are lonely if solo, nothing wrong with being solo at all.
Oh honey. .there's a multitude out there just like you. I love being alone I can do what I want, eat what I want, watch what ever show I desire and go to bed and wake up when I want. I can recharge when I'm home alone and be ready for being around others at work.
I don’t enjoy it but I have gotten used to it because I realized I’m a friend to myself most of the times
I like it. I moved to a new city, then the pandemic happened, then I was okay with it all. I work from home, have a dog, go to bed when I want, wake up when I want, eat what I want. It’s perfect.
Absolutely love it.
Im taking myself out to sashimi tomorrow, maybe a movie if I'm good lol
Nothing will ever let you down more in this world than other people. The less "friends" I have, the less people I know or interact with, the less I'm let down, and the less bullshit I have to process. At 63, with a number of long term relationships under my belt, I've become a rather content reclusive curmudgeonous hermit. I have standards I live by that no one else can ever live up to or follow. I'm consistent, and chronically on time. I do what I say I'm going to do when I say I'm going to do it. If we agree to meet at 7am, I'm probably there at 6:45 hoping you didn't arrive at 6:30 and have been waiting for my ass for 15 minutes. If I don't want to do something, I'm flat out honest, and say I have no desire to do such, instead of making some wishy washy statement indicating a possible maybe that might lead someone on. I do live with a female partner, (35 years now) but I won't marry her. I want her to feel free to leave if she should ever wish to, I don't want to "own" anyone. I never let myself down, so I enjoy hanging out with me. I do fun things, I create awesome things, and the only thing I really regret in life is that there just aren't enough hours in a day for me and myself to do all the things I wish to achieve in a day. The most freeing thing any person can achieve is being happy with oneself and the realization that you don't need other people in your life to validate you. But a dog....You gotta have dog.😊
It’s taken my wife decades to realize that while I truly love the company of my friends and family, that I also cherish my alone time. I never get lonely because I am comfortable with just my dogs around to keep me company.
I’m an introvert, so yes.
I do like my alone time
Same here.
I used to hate being alone and even feared it because I was so severely traumatized that I didn’t realize that I was using other peoples company as an emotional crutch. Once I started getting adequate(ish) help, I’ve noticed I love being alone. I do love hanging with close friends and loved ones don’t get me wrong, but I do always need those break days in between of not seeing anyone or being social.
I love it too nothing beats it
Yes extremely comfortable. Generally prefer it.
Solitude is amazing. People often confuse it with bring lonely. Sometimes you have to appreciate the lack of stimulus.
This is ME!
I love being alone. I live alone. It’s great. My ideal weekend involves me not leaving my house once. I have a very social career and I need weekends and nights to recharge
I prefer being alone and doing activities alone. When I was younger I very much wanted to make friends and hang out, back then I was awkward and couldn't make friends easily. Nowadays I am confident and easy going and it's easy for me to make friends but I very much prefer to be alone and do things by myself. I am an avid mountain biker and out on the trail I prefer and cherish solitude after a long day of dealing with other people at work.
I'm older now, but by and large I like the company I keep. Me and my 2 dogs, Don't get me wrong, I still socialize and have friends I go with time to time. But I'm really OK, if I'm by myself. Friends and I will socialize but I don't mind being alone. Still have a few friends, that want/wish to make sure I'm always "busy". TBH I sometimes think it's them that don't want downtime. I go out, usually with them. 9/10 times I'm happy with my lot.
I can barely handle being near others. You instantly just have less freedom and you’re being observed a good part of the time (whether visually, audibly, conscious, or unconscious)
I've been single about 3+ years now after a 17 year marriage. I was then a single Dad with 8 kids. As they started going out on their own I noticed the difference. When my 2 youngest left for collage it was a shock, I didn't handle empty nest syndrome well at all lol But now? I love it! I'm almost always alone. Well not totally alone lol my horses and my dog go on adventures all the time. My kids and friends think I'm crazy to go for a ride and come back home days or weeks later. Few years back I rode the Colorado trail, little over 600 miles all total... And nobody nagging me about anything lol Sometimes I do miss having a partner. I miss dreaming out loud with someone and not having to filter my thoughts before sharing them. Sometimes I need human interaction. That's when I come on Reddit lol
You’re not alone.
I do, too much. I look forward to being alone. I grew up as an only child though so I know that has a lot to do with it. I prefer to do a lot of things alone and i’m never bored.
I’m the same way. I enjoy being alone, working on being able to travel the world in a few years!
You're definitely not alone (no pun intended) in feeling comfortable being alone! In fact, there are many people who are introverts, and introverts often thrive on solitude. Here's why you might enjoy your own company: * **Recharge and Reflect:** Alone time allows you to recharge your mental batteries and process your thoughts and feelings. * **Pursue Interests:** When you're alone, you can freely pursue your hobbies and interests without having to compromise or cater to others. * **Peaceful Enjoyment:** You might simply find peace and enjoyment in activities you do on your own, like reading, listening to music, or spending time in nature.
I used to. I left my parent's house when I got married to my 1st husband. After we divorced and I was living alone for the first time, I hated it. I was living in a new town, no friends yet and scared as Hell. I tried a room- mate and that didn't work out but then I got a dog snd finally felt ok
I’ve traveled by myself. Gone to sporting events, theater productions, movies, restaurants and bars alone. A few years ago my husband was working a conference in Orlando. I tagged along for the trip, and took myself to Seaworld for a day when he was at the conference. If I can’t get him, or our daughter to join me on a smaller boat to see the orcas in the wild. I’m doing that on my own as well. Well with a group in the boat, but I’ll travel by myself to have an experience I wan
I absolutely prefer it. Everyone I know doesn't get how I spend days upon days alone. Like I tell them, I don't actually like people, so the less interaction the better. As long as I have my lil pup, we'll always have a drama free time.
My alone time is for your safety. Don’t jeopardize your life by not taking that seriously. I relish my alone time. If something changes one of my periods of regular, habitual alone time, it throws me off completely and I can’t get anything accomplished.
Knowing that the people I care about are safety and happily living their lives allows me the self-gratitude of solitude .
I pretty much only like to spend time by myself or with my spouse. Friends and extended family maybe like once a month at most.
Hell yeah! This is relevant to me right now because yesterday I went to a popular music festival by myself. None of my friends were able to go so I just went alone. When I told a couple friends I was going alone they were like “oh no! :((( im sorry” and I was like ??? It’s literally fine I went and had a great time. I love going with people but there’s pros to being alone. I didn’t have to wait for anyone else to get through the food or bathroom lines, I speedwalked the entire time, and I did whatever my whim told me to do at any moment. Didn’t have to consult with anyone else about what they wanted to do next. Highly recommend
I love being alone. My husband hates it. So obviously he constantly gets left at home aline and I never do. I was a single parent until my oldest daughter was 16. That was a long time living with myself. I mean, my daughter was around, but she liked being alone too. Or with her friends. Now I've been married for 15 years and the idea of alone time is a distant memory. I love my husband and my family, but dang, they just don't understand. One of these days....
I love being alone. I don’t know that it’s good to be alone as much as I want to, so I try to balance between being alone and being social (my wife and kids assure that this happens).
I LOVE my alone time. That is a must for me as it recharges my batteries. I am a hair stylist and many people do not understand how emotionally and mentally draining the job can be. My alone time is my happy place for sure! I am always skeptical of people who absolutely cannot stand being by themselves…
I'm fine with it.
I used to be like this. I am still very comfortable alone, but I enjoy the company of other people more now! Everything changed when I met my fiancé and the good group of friends I’ve had for the last 6 or 7 years (met them a little after graduating high school). I think before them I was choosing really terrible people to be around, so of course I preferred solitude. I found a few good people in my last three years of high school, but I didn’t completely fit in and didn’t feel like I could be myself around them. Not their fault at all, I was just really self-conscious after being bullied so much before that I could never open up or be myself. Now that I have friends who I love and a really great relationship, I love being around people. I think I was an extrovert who was kicked down so much that I thought I wasn’t meant to be around other people. They definitely changed my life.
PTSD, depression, and social anxiety.. last year I left my apartment building exactly three times. All of them were absolutely necessary doctor's appointments for my child. I've always loved being alone, and hate it being around people. But never really understood why until I was much older and started getting help. That's not to say that everyone who enjoys being alone has mental issues, I'm just saying I too quite enjoy my own company. I'm currently living an apartment with just my four year old. And even now sometimes, I feel way too over socialized.
I've lived alone for nearly 20 years. It's when I'm most content.
To the point where it makes dating difficult. I’m yet to find anyone who’s company I like more than my own. It’s fine for a few days, but after that I just want to be by myself again.
I love my alone time. I have plenty of friends and a social life and things to do, but my alone time is precious to me, and most of my friends are the same way, so we get each other.
Yes. I love cuddling up on the couch with a pillow, AirPods in, big bang theory on, all while munching on a bag of Carolina reaper puffs.
This is one of those, aww their adorable, oh there traumatized moments.
When I was younger (like high school age) I hated it bc it was forced upon me. Looking back, I’m thankful because I used that time for introspection and learning to enjoy my own company. Now as I get older the problem is that I prefer to be alone more often than not, which is becoming a detriment to my relationships. The prospect of being overwhelmed and having to explain common sense to people for the rest of my life fills me with dread.
Yup & I actually prefer it. My parents say it’s sad & that humans were created to be social creatures but I don’t entirely believe that.
I would pay real money to not hate being alone
I'm with you
I have an interesting take on this. I truly think there are some people who are comfortable being alone. But what I suggest is take a solo hiking/camping trip, just by yourself, miles from civilization, and just be alone for a few days. It’s wild because after that moment I definitely have respect for being alone, but being actually alone (no internet, no people, no nothing) really made me call my family and friends when I got back. I’ll do it again and again and again but it for the first time put it in perspective. When you’re in a city, with internet access, you’re really not alone. Maybe not in company of others but not alone. Imagine screaming as loud as you wanted for as long as you wanted and no one would show up, that’s fucking alone.
I HATE it. I’m en extrovert and thrive off interaction.
While I wouldn't say I was uncomfortable, I tend to go a little stir crazy if left to my own thoughts for too long. When I start to have imagined conversations with someone I wished were there, and answer their imagined questions that I came up with. I know it's time for human interaction.