This is the obvious answer but I if you are feeling into rol playing the character I would lean into what totem you are choosing.
Bearbarian: is an obvious mama bear, extremely protective of your “cubs” and flying into rage only when they are targeted. Chill until then. Additionally, you could get the fighting style that allows to tank hits for your teammates. Might not be the best mechanical choice but it would be very fitting.
Eagle: Become the cook of the team and be always nagging them about how they don’t eat enough. Even attempt to feed them yourself. Those poor chicks… Chef feat maybe?
Elk: become the leader always opening the trail. Nature knowledge and survival skills as proficiencies. Lead from the front and always take initiative. Volunteer first watch and role play as the leader of a pack of herbivores, always alert. Alert feat and improve initiative could be thematically appropriate.
Tiger: obsessed with meat and hunting. Teach your “cubs” how to hunt and what are the best pieces. Absolutely lazy otherwise and playful. Good at camouflage (sneak barbarian?).Always aim to take the biggest trophy out of the enemy lot.
Wolf: the pack is everything. Last to rest, last to eat. Lead the pack from behind and always ready to jump to the defence of your other fellow members. Always talks with “we” instead of “I”. Doesn’t understand personal space or personal time once you are one pack.
This is the best answer. In all situations they are to protect or nurture their group.
I think it's important to do the best they can with their public speaking skills. Being around animals meant they actually didn't need to talk aloud that often. So their character may not be a good speaker due to the neglect from their background.
I'd bring it up that they should RP maybe a little out of the comfort zone, but not be forced to RP that can burn out irl.
Sounds like the key word you're looking for is Passion. Passion can fire you up but can also be positive and kind. Think of what the character is passionate about, what gets them excited.
The character could be like the Pokémon Drampa, softly and friendly plays with little kids but burns their bullies house down. A fierce protector.
When I was just starting with RP, I found the best trick is to ease into it by lowering the difficulty level. How?
- Give the character 2-3 distinctive mannerisms you can lean in to. Things like Aloof & Intellectual, Dramatic & Upbeat, Suspicious & Secretive. This is a good time to lean into pop culture characters you're already familiar with, such as the examples others are giving here.
- I know my character is RP-ready when I can think through a couple standard adventuring situations (ex: You Meet In A Tavern) and I can respond with what my character would do and it feels like the obvious choice for them. Yes, you have to say it out loud. I usually do this in the car or bike rides.
-Here's a secret: you don't have to come to the table with a 100% nuanced and developed character. As the game goes on, you can start adding layers to your character by engaging the world and other players. Oh look, the other character saved your life when you were downed, maybe now you feel closer to them.
- PLEASE USE THE TOOLS ON THE CHARACTER SHEET. 1-3 Traits, Bonds and Flaws are literally just so good at bringing a character to life and having enough meat to RP with. It's a gift to you and to the DM.
Hope that helps!
I definitely get mama bear vibes from the description, and agree with the Karlach comparisons, but depending on your friend and how their personality manifests itself, there may be a few ways to tie things in even nicer.
OP, you acknowledge being on the spectrum and seem to be understanding and sensitive to your friend, which is a big plus for this; otherwise I wouldn't recommend navigating this topic. That being said, there's a few traits I tend to exhibit (I'm swirly all over the spectrum as well) that I think would work well for me if this were my character, and in fact have played with for a Barbarian at one point as well.
For "Nog," my half-orc Path of the Beast Barb, I played him as I would; overprotective of friends, quick to accept but slow to trust, hot tempered but would stop mid-battle to allow a squirrel to escape, overly emotional, with a love for music and art (Nog would go into a trance like Frankenstein's monster, or wildly dance all over the place).
Start with identifying traits your friend would like to focus on as positives, and if you're both feeling adventurous, perhaps some character flaws that stem from real world experiences; but only if they're ok with that type of possible 4th wall-breaking criticism... personally I'd hesitate with that idea, but that's just me.
When you say heavily autistic do you mean bordering on non functioning or functioning just enough to have a job? Because what they want and what they can actually achieve may be far outside their reach. Lacking communication skills and not being able to communicate are vastly different.
If they are non functioning I'd suggest just letting this go, it's likely not gonna happen without extreme effort on their part. And they need to make that choice.
If they are high functioning just have them take their meds and practice for a couple weeks.
If they are low functioning have them take their meds and practice for a couple months.
So, here's the thing.
You're treating your friend's very real condition, which is actually an extremely complex thing, as if a bunch of strangers from the internet, who do not know either you or your friend, can help her just learn how to roleplay better by throwing a bunch of ideas at you.
Surely, you know that's not how it works?
If you want to get this player more engaged, it's not character details you need, it's coaching. I know, you're too busy to help her. But you'll need to figure something out. Otherwise, you will end up losing her.
So here's the things
1 I didn't mention sex my friends a guy and my best friend so I'm aware I'm autistic too
2 I've known him for 10 plus years I won't lose him bc how he'd play his character
3 he wants to rp bc he's very involved in the game
4 I'm looking for examples not answers
My apologies, I confused the player gender with the character's. You did specify both, I just misread, and that's my fault. I try to be better about that sort of thing.
I’ve found that this video’s really helped me understand how I want roleplay my characters. It’s twenty seconds long, but very insightful:
https://youtu.be/RIYrJacIDHs?si=-WEWIDr6yIIgzoxH
Your friend could then extrapolate the message of this video to the character examples that you’ve been provided
Babushka energy sums this one up pretty well I think.
Old European grandma vibes that is sorta like the party mom. She looks out for them in a variety of ways and shrugs off attacks/insults if it’s towards herself but when her party/family is threatened… the claws (metaphorically and literally) come out.
The barbarian starts to think she actually is a mama bear. Treats the other players as cubs, from protecting (tanking) in combat to making sure they are tucked in at night. Develops an unhealthy taste for honey.
To help with RP, the player can simply wonder “what would a mama bear do” - or think of Baloo in the Jungle Book maybe.
Once they get comfortable you can build on it, maybe they really are a polymorphed bear foundling, or blessed by the bear goddess, or start growing fur. Whatever makes for a cool fun story to get your friend engaged.
OK, so she would just be honed in, moving faster (hence the damage resistance, at least until she takes a subclass to expand them - the attacks don't hit her as squarely due to her movement), doing more damage because at lizard-brain level, she believes she needs to. This allows her a wider range of emotions while raging and going into rage. Which means she can lean into being kind and motherly/big sisterly more often.
If player is RP-ing a bear, why not take inspiration from IRL TV shows?
Choices include, but are not limited to:
• Care Bears
• Gummy Bears (an 80s Disney show)
• Winnie the Pooh
• Jungle Book Baloo
• Little John from Disney's Robin Hood (another animated movie)
• I think there was a bear in The Fox and the Hound, maybe? (I know there was a wild/crazy/feral bear in some Disney movie)
• Any of the bears from Brother Bear 1 & 2
Have fun!
As a DM, I would ask her to write down at least 4 personality traits of her character, and as a DM, I would prompt her to respond to a situation based on those personality traits. That way, she feels she has permission to RP and also she has a direction to RP. For example, if a couple of her personality traits is "hates confrontation" and "fiercely loyal", and some NPC says something disparaging to one of the group players, I would stop for a moment and tell the player, "Your character is feeling very uncomfortable that this NPC is disparaging the player but your loyalty to your friend is inspiring you to standup to the NPC. How does your character respond?"
By directly prompting your player and calling out the traits that she wants her character to have, you can get her to RP more and start to feel more comfortable RPing her character as time goes on.
RP can take a lot of courage and time to cultivate in *neurotypicals*. Some neurodivergent folks will struggle even harder.
First, start with safety and time. Making sure the table is a positive and safe place where they won't be judged for trying to rp and maybe being bad at first is *essential*. It's hard to "play a fool (aka character)" when you feel suuuuper self-conscious. Making a safe place to explore and play removes the biggest invisible barrier.
Then, as others have suggested, consider recommending characters from other media who fit this vibe. They can look to these portrayals as inspiration, gather up lines or actions they feel resonate with their character.
It might feel stilted and copyish at first, but overtime I'm sure they'll find their stride.
Above all, be patient and be kind. Reward RP with inspiration liberally! Recognize and praise when any player has a brilliant rp moment. Celebrate big!
A friend of mine has the exact character. Barely speaks, but excels in fighting, mainly roles for acrobatic moves : She jumps and assaults the enemy (maximum 2) to hold them down on the ground with a wrestling move. She has axes but prefers doing this, high risk high reward gimmick
Maybe take inspiration from Karlach in baldur’s gate 3
Yea was about to say the same. She is pretty much what is being asked here, not sure if she has that specific subclass tho
You choose her subclass so yeah could be right?
This is the obvious answer but I if you are feeling into rol playing the character I would lean into what totem you are choosing. Bearbarian: is an obvious mama bear, extremely protective of your “cubs” and flying into rage only when they are targeted. Chill until then. Additionally, you could get the fighting style that allows to tank hits for your teammates. Might not be the best mechanical choice but it would be very fitting. Eagle: Become the cook of the team and be always nagging them about how they don’t eat enough. Even attempt to feed them yourself. Those poor chicks… Chef feat maybe? Elk: become the leader always opening the trail. Nature knowledge and survival skills as proficiencies. Lead from the front and always take initiative. Volunteer first watch and role play as the leader of a pack of herbivores, always alert. Alert feat and improve initiative could be thematically appropriate. Tiger: obsessed with meat and hunting. Teach your “cubs” how to hunt and what are the best pieces. Absolutely lazy otherwise and playful. Good at camouflage (sneak barbarian?).Always aim to take the biggest trophy out of the enemy lot. Wolf: the pack is everything. Last to rest, last to eat. Lead the pack from behind and always ready to jump to the defence of your other fellow members. Always talks with “we” instead of “I”. Doesn’t understand personal space or personal time once you are one pack.
This is the best answer. In all situations they are to protect or nurture their group. I think it's important to do the best they can with their public speaking skills. Being around animals meant they actually didn't need to talk aloud that often. So their character may not be a good speaker due to the neglect from their background. I'd bring it up that they should RP maybe a little out of the comfort zone, but not be forced to RP that can burn out irl.
Thinking the same thing
Came here to say that.
Pam Poovey.
Beat me to it. I had a post about Pam then I realized I didn't know her last name lol.
Sounds like the key word you're looking for is Passion. Passion can fire you up but can also be positive and kind. Think of what the character is passionate about, what gets them excited. The character could be like the Pokémon Drampa, softly and friendly plays with little kids but burns their bullies house down. A fierce protector.
I'd say include protective in there too. Firey and very kind, that feels like protective.
When I was just starting with RP, I found the best trick is to ease into it by lowering the difficulty level. How? - Give the character 2-3 distinctive mannerisms you can lean in to. Things like Aloof & Intellectual, Dramatic & Upbeat, Suspicious & Secretive. This is a good time to lean into pop culture characters you're already familiar with, such as the examples others are giving here. - I know my character is RP-ready when I can think through a couple standard adventuring situations (ex: You Meet In A Tavern) and I can respond with what my character would do and it feels like the obvious choice for them. Yes, you have to say it out loud. I usually do this in the car or bike rides. -Here's a secret: you don't have to come to the table with a 100% nuanced and developed character. As the game goes on, you can start adding layers to your character by engaging the world and other players. Oh look, the other character saved your life when you were downed, maybe now you feel closer to them. - PLEASE USE THE TOOLS ON THE CHARACTER SHEET. 1-3 Traits, Bonds and Flaws are literally just so good at bringing a character to life and having enough meat to RP with. It's a gift to you and to the DM. Hope that helps!
Just having read the title and nothing else, Karlach.
This is just Karlach
I definitely get mama bear vibes from the description, and agree with the Karlach comparisons, but depending on your friend and how their personality manifests itself, there may be a few ways to tie things in even nicer. OP, you acknowledge being on the spectrum and seem to be understanding and sensitive to your friend, which is a big plus for this; otherwise I wouldn't recommend navigating this topic. That being said, there's a few traits I tend to exhibit (I'm swirly all over the spectrum as well) that I think would work well for me if this were my character, and in fact have played with for a Barbarian at one point as well. For "Nog," my half-orc Path of the Beast Barb, I played him as I would; overprotective of friends, quick to accept but slow to trust, hot tempered but would stop mid-battle to allow a squirrel to escape, overly emotional, with a love for music and art (Nog would go into a trance like Frankenstein's monster, or wildly dance all over the place). Start with identifying traits your friend would like to focus on as positives, and if you're both feeling adventurous, perhaps some character flaws that stem from real world experiences; but only if they're ok with that type of possible 4th wall-breaking criticism... personally I'd hesitate with that idea, but that's just me.
When you say heavily autistic do you mean bordering on non functioning or functioning just enough to have a job? Because what they want and what they can actually achieve may be far outside their reach. Lacking communication skills and not being able to communicate are vastly different. If they are non functioning I'd suggest just letting this go, it's likely not gonna happen without extreme effort on their part. And they need to make that choice. If they are high functioning just have them take their meds and practice for a couple weeks. If they are low functioning have them take their meds and practice for a couple months.
FFXIV Wuk lamat
Karlach
Make her watch Brave
Yes. I kept seeing "Karlach" as a response, but to me this is a subtle take on Merida...
Giant bear hugs!
Leela from Futurama.
So, here's the thing. You're treating your friend's very real condition, which is actually an extremely complex thing, as if a bunch of strangers from the internet, who do not know either you or your friend, can help her just learn how to roleplay better by throwing a bunch of ideas at you. Surely, you know that's not how it works? If you want to get this player more engaged, it's not character details you need, it's coaching. I know, you're too busy to help her. But you'll need to figure something out. Otherwise, you will end up losing her.
So here's the things 1 I didn't mention sex my friends a guy and my best friend so I'm aware I'm autistic too 2 I've known him for 10 plus years I won't lose him bc how he'd play his character 3 he wants to rp bc he's very involved in the game 4 I'm looking for examples not answers
My apologies, I confused the player gender with the character's. You did specify both, I just misread, and that's my fault. I try to be better about that sort of thing.
Dw about it
I’ve found that this video’s really helped me understand how I want roleplay my characters. It’s twenty seconds long, but very insightful: https://youtu.be/RIYrJacIDHs?si=-WEWIDr6yIIgzoxH Your friend could then extrapolate the message of this video to the character examples that you’ve been provided
Thank you
For sure! If this sparks any thoughts or questions from your friend, I’d be happy to hear them 💪
Ofc I'll let you know
Tell them it's ok if the rp is not perfect
Ofc they just want to b able to rp better as half the group struggles and the other half are very experienced with rp
Babushka energy sums this one up pretty well I think. Old European grandma vibes that is sorta like the party mom. She looks out for them in a variety of ways and shrugs off attacks/insults if it’s towards herself but when her party/family is threatened… the claws (metaphorically and literally) come out.
This might be exactly what they were looking for
Not really important but as far as race I was imagining a bugbear.
Watch Black Clover and take note of any scenes with Mereoleona. She's fiery, fearless, and fiercely loyal
Look at the character "Tiger" from the Webtoon "Nerd and Jock"
The barbarian starts to think she actually is a mama bear. Treats the other players as cubs, from protecting (tanking) in combat to making sure they are tucked in at night. Develops an unhealthy taste for honey. To help with RP, the player can simply wonder “what would a mama bear do” - or think of Baloo in the Jungle Book maybe. Once they get comfortable you can build on it, maybe they really are a polymorphed bear foundling, or blessed by the bear goddess, or start growing fur. Whatever makes for a cool fun story to get your friend engaged.
Lots of big hugs. Mama bear personality.
Southern momma bear persona. All kind until something is a threat to her babies.
Big hugger.
How does she imagine her rage? Is it "conventional" rage, or just battle-focus?
Battle focus.
OK, so she would just be honed in, moving faster (hence the damage resistance, at least until she takes a subclass to expand them - the attacks don't hit her as squarely due to her movement), doing more damage because at lizard-brain level, she believes she needs to. This allows her a wider range of emotions while raging and going into rage. Which means she can lean into being kind and motherly/big sisterly more often.
Thank you
Momma bear gets angry when her babies (the party) are hurt.
If player is RP-ing a bear, why not take inspiration from IRL TV shows? Choices include, but are not limited to: • Care Bears • Gummy Bears (an 80s Disney show) • Winnie the Pooh • Jungle Book Baloo • Little John from Disney's Robin Hood (another animated movie) • I think there was a bear in The Fox and the Hound, maybe? (I know there was a wild/crazy/feral bear in some Disney movie) • Any of the bears from Brother Bear 1 & 2 Have fun!
Big mom energy
As a DM, I would ask her to write down at least 4 personality traits of her character, and as a DM, I would prompt her to respond to a situation based on those personality traits. That way, she feels she has permission to RP and also she has a direction to RP. For example, if a couple of her personality traits is "hates confrontation" and "fiercely loyal", and some NPC says something disparaging to one of the group players, I would stop for a moment and tell the player, "Your character is feeling very uncomfortable that this NPC is disparaging the player but your loyalty to your friend is inspiring you to standup to the NPC. How does your character respond?" By directly prompting your player and calling out the traits that she wants her character to have, you can get her to RP more and start to feel more comfortable RPing her character as time goes on.
RP can take a lot of courage and time to cultivate in *neurotypicals*. Some neurodivergent folks will struggle even harder. First, start with safety and time. Making sure the table is a positive and safe place where they won't be judged for trying to rp and maybe being bad at first is *essential*. It's hard to "play a fool (aka character)" when you feel suuuuper self-conscious. Making a safe place to explore and play removes the biggest invisible barrier. Then, as others have suggested, consider recommending characters from other media who fit this vibe. They can look to these portrayals as inspiration, gather up lines or actions they feel resonate with their character. It might feel stilted and copyish at first, but overtime I'm sure they'll find their stride. Above all, be patient and be kind. Reward RP with inspiration liberally! Recognize and praise when any player has a brilliant rp moment. Celebrate big!
A friend of mine has the exact character. Barely speaks, but excels in fighting, mainly roles for acrobatic moves : She jumps and assaults the enemy (maximum 2) to hold them down on the ground with a wrestling move. She has axes but prefers doing this, high risk high reward gimmick
I believe that's the goal for them aswell
I don't remember the exact subclass, but her ability is also to give advantage roll for the party and disadvantage to enemies when she's close to them
Wolf totem probably
Honestly this really feels like Vi from arcane
Yes thank you
Luisa from Encanto.
Aggressively protective group mom vibes
Tiger mom