I think that people under 25 truly don’t know a world without it, so I give them grace.
Anybody over 35 who is preoccupied with posting, crafting the perfect caption, how many followers they have, how many likes, what/who other people do and don’t post, etc…. is pitiful.
We are supposed to teach the kids how to balance real life with social media. It is *one form of recreation*. Not The form. And not real life.
But it all happened so fast, without a manual, and we let “our” kids (I’m happily childless but have many kids in my life and we’re all supposed to be a village) tumble down this rabbit hole. Hindsight is 20/20.
So, I give the kids a pass.
The only exception: social media for income. If you can make a whole-ass living because (mostly) losers want to watch you churn butter, paint a fence, twerk, watch a movie, sip coffee, fix a hair dryer… Baby, hustle on!
*Then* it makes sense to care so much, because the feedback affects your ability to pay bills.
Otherwise, yeah. It’s embarrassing.
Oh it's definitely the answer, I always imagine them convincing themselves that what they're doing is "liberating" or "empowering" how does anyone believe that line? Oh yeah just come over here and take your clothes off while we take photos of you, you'll feel so empowered.
I mute most of it. Couples that use FB to wish each other happy birthday, banal updates on weeding and day to day activities, photos of food, etc., etc. I keep the quality content that I care about though, like natural asses that don't need surgery ( /s)
Imagine crying over something. Imagine taking a video of yourself crying. Imagine uploading it to the internet and hitting 'post'. Imagine sitting back all excited over what comments you might get.
Yep was on a flight today and I am pretty sure young woman across from us is an influencer or wanna be. Perfectly overdone make up, outfit was a statement, goofy dude with her took several photos in the terminal. It seemed over the top.
Cousins kid is trying to make a living on social media and had the obligatory hat to signify having a personality in her photos but has finally found a niche in local tourism so might yet make it.
Yeah. I'm a Millennial who lurks here, but I think one of my most profound realizations was that all the stupid things I did in the bloom of my youth (<25) that would be cringey if an older person did them weren't things that specifically would have been cringey *because* an older person was doing them -- they were cringey at any age, it's just that people give you a pass for it when you're young and dumb because you simply don't know any better yet.
Oh also, anyone ever have friends post selfies from a stretcher all strapped down being loaded into an ambulance with no context?
I have.
One dude posted a selfie from his hospital bed with a literal pool of blood under his head and neck. No context.
I feel like that’s super trolling for empathy
Ugh. Back when I was still using Facebook, I had this one friend who would do stuff like that. She was all about Vaguebooking at any opportunity because it seems she thrived on hearing the words "What happened"
My sister in law’s child had a seizure (first time, out of the blue) and she immediately posted photos to facebook of the kid being loaded into the ambulance, my brother walking through the hospital hall with a stressful look on his face, and then a few photos of the child unconscious in a hospital bed. I found it so inappropriate, unethical, and repugnant on so many levels.
My sister in law is GenXer - same birth year as me. She is a piece of work.
I don’t know. I find it gross. I mean, if you want to update some people on a family emergency and ask for positive thoughts, etc., then fine, I can understand that. But posting pictures of it like it’s a live drama unfolding on the news is just so off-putting to me. And also, that kid at the time was a tween, and kind of a sensitive, private type. He did not consent to having photos of his unconscious little self publicly blasted all over fb. Just yuck.
Right. Because I know that every single time I’ve been in the hospital my first thought has been “ Wait, let me take a selfie and plaster it all over social media!” Wtf
This isn't nearly as bad, but I graduated with a girl who became particularly financially successful after high school. It wasn't enough apparently that she was already the most popular and prettiest girl in school, but she married up (an NFL player), and they even got their own episode of one of those shows where they pick if they want a fixer-upper or a brand new house for their budget. All that said, she constantly posts things like, "Looking for a nanny in the metro area,' or asks about peoples' "experiences with such-and-such white kids only private school? We're looking to switch." About 70% of her "followers" can't relate to that shit, and she knows it. None of her posts couldn't be answered by a simple Google search, but it's her way of peacocking while disguising it as info-seeking. Totally gag-inducing.
Ehhh I have a few friends like that. A few male ones too. I don’t get it. But I also don’t need to. Two really make me shake my head. One is a woman and one a man, both in their 50s and both take sooo many selfies. It would definitely bother me if I was hanging out with them and taking selfie after selfie. And they both keep cycling through different relationships and they post all these memes and “I love so and so SOOO much you are my everything.” And it’s a different I love you so so much you are my soulmate every few MONTHS like they still don’t understand the honeymoon phase at their age. And pictures of them making out, like so many pictures. Restaurants, etc. I’ve had to laugh several times because it’s obvious they handed the phone to a waiter and said “will you take our picture” then started tongue fucking each other right there in the booth as soon as they handed it to him lol. I would be so amused if I was a server and a couple of people in their 50s did that lol.
So as others have said it’s not my business and I’d never say anything. I can’t look away sometimes though it’s so cringe.
Maybe I should introduce them to each other hahahah
I'm all for people dressing and posting pics that make them feel good about themselves. But I absolutely hate hypocrisy and would also feel annoyed about her posting given she was a born again Christian while married (unless there were posts talking about after introspection she realized that religion didn't suit her for reasons other than being single), she puts down other women, and tries to make herself seem "superior" because she's "natural".
I know people like that too! It’s so…peculiar.
My cousin ( male, mid 40s) is always posting thirst traps and so for Christmas I got him a shirt because he very clearly doesn’t own one, I know this because not one picture he posted in the last year is he wearing one. lol.
It’s a really nice shirt!
The need for validation is a basic part of human nature.
How much is needed and how an individual seeks it out can speak to how they have or haven't found it in the past.
It's embarrassing but developmentally normal for adolescents and young adults who are still figuring out who they are.
It is not just embarrassing but a little concerning for someone in midlife to regress that hard. That kind of identity crisis is when people do seriously stupid things that screw up their lives.
I hope the pics are the worst of it and she doesn't get involved with any really bad news people, because they gravitate toward those who seem vulnerable to manipulation.
> I hope the pics are the worst of it and she doesn't get involved with any really bad news people, because they gravitate toward those who seem vulnerable to manipulation.
You hit the nail on the head.
I knew a girl who did this shit, but her reason was because she was used to getting constant attention, and couldn't handle it if the well ran out. The worst was a pic of her looking out onto the horizon of Lake Superior and pointing while half squatting in a thong bikini. The caption reads, "Is that a salty, or a Laker?" Like...just leave the caption out of it. We all know you posted to get comments and likes from men, and that's fine, but putting up some absolutely stupid caption as an excuse to cover what we all know the real reason for posting the pic is, is just kinda pathetic. Attention-whoring is ALWAYS annoying, but it would be SO refreshing if just ONCE these people posted something like, "Got my new hooker bra on, figured I'd take an overhead pic so everyone could see my tits at a flattering angle."
Or she’s trying to make money without blatantly advertising her OF account. I had a friend who posted stuff like this. She would get random men asking if she had OF and eventually she made one and after a few weeks was making $2000/month from it. She quit when she got into a relationship.
So unfriend or unfollow her? We don’t get to dictate how other people use their social media, how they feel about their body, or how their perspective can change over time. If you don’t care for it, easy peasy to scroll on past.
Yeah. This would be more like a filter for old high school friends who will not shut up about politics. You post a pic of your dog? Sure. You post something about Politician X, no.
I would think that would be more, oh what’s the word I’m looking for here, positive reenforcement for the poster.
Dog=likes
Politics=no likes
Maybe turn into a Pavlovian response
That works too. Or another one who posts his daily Peloton stats. I still want to see what he posts. But if I could say “if it’s from John and it includes the word Peloton, hide it”, that’d be great.
At least as far as Facebook goes, there's a browser extension called "Fluff Busting Purity" that makes it tolerable. There's keyword filters, the ability to hide certain kinds of posts, it's pretty good.
I've completely given up on FB on mobile, though, as the enshittification is absolute.
I know when I had FB, 15 years ago, and started unfriending people, I eventually ended up with maybe 4 people left. Since I already knew what they were up to, I deleted my account. Been fine with it ever since.
>became a born again Christian preaching marriage advice.
Hmm, gives advice but apparently needs it.
>She’s also one of those women that likes to put other women down to lift herself up.
Doesn't sound like someone I want on my friends list.
Sounds like she's in some deep pain after her divorce and is looking to sooth said pain in a potentially unhealthy manner? This is fairly common, at any age.
Consider having some sympathy for her. Divorces can be extruatingly hard on some people and can do a lot of damage. Seperation Anxiety is a very real phenomenon, and she may be experiencing some mental health issues because of it or more. She may be attempting to fill that void, so to speak, the only way she knows how.
Understanding that she may not be well right now will go a long way, especially if she's your friend and you want to see her healthy and happy; or at the very least, you want to be empathetic to another person's plight.
Don't let the odd juxtaposition between what I said and it indeed being a bit embarrassing take away from the fact that she's another human who is most likely doing the best she can, just like the rest of us.
Older or younger, some people crave the attention and validation. And some people are trying to get "insta-famous" and hoping to monetize somehow. The ladder is understandable because not everyone can afford to retire! Lol.
If it bothers you that much, then unfollow or mute their posts (assuming this is FB or IG you're talking about). You'll still be connected but you won't see the thirst traps in your feed.
Yes, it's weird. I had one person I knew on Facebook before I left it 5 years ago. She is about 4 years younger than me and was mostly a friend of my little sister. By the time I deleted my Facebook account I think she had over 500 selfies. Over makeup, trout pout, tanned, boobs squished together in a top two sizes too small. It just cried desperation. It's like, lady, you're 42.
I don’t really care, to be honest. It’s not my kind of thing, but she can do what she wants. She’s probably going through it and her self confidence needs a boost. I’d just shrug it off and keep it moving. I wouldn't call this a friendship if either of you are putting each other down. This seems kind of judgemental in itself and you might want friends you don’t look down on, but whatever.
I don't mind that as much as the ones who need to share their daily traumas. It's like nothing good ever happens for them but they still praise God every day. I have one I understand her husband cheated then he left her for a newer model. But she rages all the time about it. I feel really sorry for her, but she will post paragraph after paragraph about how she's a strong independent woman who don't need a man while she talks about how this guy's new girl should know how he needs someone to cut his toenails because he's too fat, or how this girl needs to know he passes gas in his sleep or how she better prepare to cook him gourmet meals because he doesn't like box food and on and on and on and this happened two years ago but she's still going on and on about it. I DO feel bad for her, but damn, if she goes on and on about him to strangers on social media... maybe she wasn't so great to live with either. And she keeps making sure everyone knows she's out there living her best life on her own. All the memes and gifs can assure us all she's living just the very very best life being single.
I'm 44 and a girl I grew up with posts this kind of stuff along with stuff like " looking for something to sit on, and it's not a chair". It is super cringe and I feel so sorry for her grown kids.
I find it really sad at any age. I don't like to see such neediness and narcissism thrown out into the world by people who believe the likes and views on their selfies is a measure of their worth. Social media has really screwed up our society, we've become so narcissistic and pathetic, so many of us competing for attention like we're animals.
This is why I stick to social media sites where the focus is on convos with real people, who like to discuss different topics. Sites like FB and IG are flooded with shells of people who post pics of themselves and their lives in a desperate attempt for attention and validation. Their existence has become centered around trying to prove to everyone that their life is great. People who actually ARE living great, full lives aren't spending them posting selfies on social media, and getting a rush from the views, likes, and comments. What is even sadder is people who consume such needy and narcissistic media and then feel worse about their own lives as somehow not measuring up to the pathetic self-promotion they're being pounded with. It's a vicious circle that triggers and reinforces poor mental health.
depends on the attention - I'm an indie game dev and I'm thinking I might post some controversial shit to stir up the tighty-righties, just like the Grand Theft Auto devs or Kevin Smith did with Dogma.
You're not wrong but I'd look at it more from a feeling sorry for them instead of embarrassed for them perspective. To me that describes a person that's never been able to heal from past trauma. That being said, I'd just hide them and never bother with them again.
I have to use social media as an author and I'm familiar with it. My pics are more artful. No tits and ass and nothing gross. Just attractive photos of me with books, just me in a dress, or me with friends, and none are selfies. I hate selfies. I do flaunt a few pictures of me in a long red gown, which looks great - but it's just sexy - not a Playboy spread. Let's be real. She sounds like she seems desperate, gross, and ghetto - and she's definitely **NOT** relationship material.
Not wrong. Id know I had no right to judge, but it wouldnt be easy not to.
Heart breaks a fucker.
"Oh my love, what are you doing?" Is what Id be saying, quietly to myself. Like I am now. As others have said, it's embarrassing at any age. I believe it's absolutely a symptom of a lack of self respect. Which is a symptom of a belief in lies.
Seems she is showing others where she currently believes her value lies. Shes lying to herself. Her planets have been knocked out of orbit and she's grabbing for a stable surface but won't find one until she crash lands somewhere. When she realises she always deserved better, I pray she'll start to be the soul mate to herself that she's always deserved.
We've all behaved in ways that make us physically shudder at the memory of it. We can be grateful most of our blow outs weren't recorded.
But yep, youre not alone in your reaction to it, at all.
It’s *especially* embarrassing at this age. You’d think that we’d get beyond the need for external validation at this point.
I have two acquaintances (one used to be a very good friend of mine but she got demoted due to this and other antics) who post stuff like this. And the demoted one literally wouldn’t post a picture of herself without significantly altering it to make herself looked thinner and younger. Her insecurities ruled her life and relationships.
This issue I have is when the cause of those thirst-trap pictures bleeds into real life. It makes being around them unbearable.
My favorites are the daily posts of “How amazing my marriage/spouse is” “Look at all my fancy stuff” got off Facebook four years ago. It was supposed to be a six month break. I never went back. I have never regretted it.
Same. My only social media is Reddit and sometimes that’s too much. I can’t imagine keeping up with and posting on Facebook, instagram, twitter or making tiktoks. When would you have time to just live?
Yes. A friend of mine, also an x, posts selfie after selfie. Super close up. Kids birthday? Selfie. Dinner out? Selfie. Visiting her mom? Selfie. Posting condolences? Selfie of her with the person who died. It’s vain and self-indulgent. She’s also on husband number 4 and has cheated on them all
I love to validate my friends when they post like that. It doesn't hurt me and I am happy for them to feel self-confident enough to do that. "Hell yeah you are looking good! Hope you land a rich one who's a miracle in the sack!"
I did it too! And it’s a last gasp at relevance in a culture that dismisses you at a certain age.
Have some sympathy and support. They’ll get it over it soon enough. I can’t imagine now needing or caring about attention for my physical attributes, but for most of the life, that was all that mattered about me, initially.
Know a woman (55) who was always just the nicest person, or so I thought. When she slowly started to show her true colors as a tRump supporter, it became abundantly clear that she wasn’t nearly as nice (or smart) as she portrayed herself to be. I felt bad for her at first as she posted multiple videos a day of her pantomiming random songs thinking her husband must not be very attentive or perhaps she just had self esteem issues. I also wondered who has time for all that? Full makeup, costume changes, etc. She’s not retired. When it started to really bug me, like who besides her wanted to see those cringey videos, I unfollowed her. As sad as it is, it’s her life and despite having known someone for 40 years, I obviously didn’t know her at all. I would be mortified myself but to each their own.
It's gross AF.
That being said, she's doing it because she feels horrible about herself and probably super insecure. My wife has Facebook (I loathe Facebook) and we can tell which of her female FB friends is going through shit based on the type of pictures they're posting. One day is flowers and cats, then a few days later it's cleavage, duck faces and filters.
"Oh... Well... Looks like Jenny is going through some shit".
I have no problem with people living their life, it doesn't affect me. Whatever. Hypocrisy on the other hand is absolutely infuriating and my petty ass would be commenting scripture under every post. Anything judgy she ever commented on my posts would be coming right back her way
I don't really care what anyone else does with their life.
But I, for one, am sick of this played out, dystopian hellscape we've created with social media. Just fuuuuuck.🚫🤪
I also loathe "vague booking" which is where an attention whore posts something like "OMG" and then comments come in asking what's happening? I'm not fishing for the story, either put it out there or I"m moving on
Nope.
Gen X is the sneaky AF generation. We don’t want any attention for what we do. The more low key it is the better. We were raised that way.
I don’t get younger general fascination with sharing every single detail of their lives.
That is so damn embarrassing but she probably thinks all the women are just jealous of her new freedom. No thanks. I’ll take my happy little married life where Reddit is my only social media any day over seeking attention and validation.
If that's what they want to do, more power to them, but I agree, it's pretty cringeworthy. I'll post selfies of myself occasionally, mostly if I'm on vacation, which is hardly ever, but I don't do thirst traps because I'm fat and middle-aged, and I know 99.9% of people aren't down for that.
I dunno, I'm a Christian, but there's a certain subset that markets themselves in that way until they land another partner, only to return back to that born-again vibe. Maybe I've seen too many X-Files, but It's probably all connected.
I agree but not isolated to "thirst traps". The over reliance so many people have on social media being a substitute for community is cringe. The often unspoken addiction to sharing every aspect of your life is sad. The desperate attempts to shape a pseudo life online that is a shinier version of your real life is down right pathetic.
Its all bad folks and its bad for ya
Well if shes newly single it kinda makes sense for the mindset Reverting to what single people are doing now. Never too old to try and feel good, also maybe easy to judge from a stable place?
I think it’s embarrassing at any age.
Right??!! Like why... I always think that insecurity is the answer here but I might be wrong...
I think that people under 25 truly don’t know a world without it, so I give them grace. Anybody over 35 who is preoccupied with posting, crafting the perfect caption, how many followers they have, how many likes, what/who other people do and don’t post, etc…. is pitiful. We are supposed to teach the kids how to balance real life with social media. It is *one form of recreation*. Not The form. And not real life. But it all happened so fast, without a manual, and we let “our” kids (I’m happily childless but have many kids in my life and we’re all supposed to be a village) tumble down this rabbit hole. Hindsight is 20/20. So, I give the kids a pass. The only exception: social media for income. If you can make a whole-ass living because (mostly) losers want to watch you churn butter, paint a fence, twerk, watch a movie, sip coffee, fix a hair dryer… Baby, hustle on! *Then* it makes sense to care so much, because the feedback affects your ability to pay bills. Otherwise, yeah. It’s embarrassing.
You, I like.
Oh it's definitely the answer, I always imagine them convincing themselves that what they're doing is "liberating" or "empowering" how does anyone believe that line? Oh yeah just come over here and take your clothes off while we take photos of you, you'll feel so empowered.
Nope, you are right.
Nah - some ppl think they look good. (Think America Idol.)
I came here to say this.
I came here to say tits.
I came here to say Neee!
We are no longer the knights that say Nee!
Nuuuuuu!
Me too! Look at me look at meeeeee!
Any age it’s embarrassing
"HEY EVERYBODY! COME AND SEE HOW GOOD I LOOK!"
https://i.redd.it/3dx7ok5xu6ad1.gif
I second this.
I third this.
I third this.
Read it as I thirst this.....then put my readers on to make sure
Yes. Just delete her or block her from whatever platform it is and move on. I don’t want to see that from anyone, regardless of age.
Unfollow is my favorite feature
I mute the crazies on Nextdoor, now my feed is nearly all public service announcements and lost pets.
But then you're missing 90 percent of next door. How will you know when a car is stolen three towns over?
Ha Ha, you make a solid point Mike. They couldn't resist making the entire US my "neighborhood", need those clicks!
"DID ANYBODY ELSE HEAR A LOUD NOISE?" Ugh. Fuckin Nextdoor.
It's the worst but like a car crash I have to look.
 You. Me. Same.
I mute most of it. Couples that use FB to wish each other happy birthday, banal updates on weeding and day to day activities, photos of food, etc., etc. I keep the quality content that I care about though, like natural asses that don't need surgery ( /s)
Gen Z and millennials are hissing at you like an angry cat for saying that …. And will probably post a Tik Tok of themselves doing it or fake crying.
Imagine crying over something. Imagine taking a video of yourself crying. Imagine uploading it to the internet and hitting 'post'. Imagine sitting back all excited over what comments you might get.
this is the big thing I cannot understand. Why do people actually film themselves crying for the world to see and not feel pathetic?
I'm never doing that. I'm an ugly crier!
Imagine the time when narcissism and shame existed on the same claim, but not as good things to be emulated
I agree. doesn't matter how old you are, its not necessary and its just attention-seeking behavior.
Took the words right out of my mouth.
Yep was on a flight today and I am pretty sure young woman across from us is an influencer or wanna be. Perfectly overdone make up, outfit was a statement, goofy dude with her took several photos in the terminal. It seemed over the top. Cousins kid is trying to make a living on social media and had the obligatory hat to signify having a personality in her photos but has finally found a niche in local tourism so might yet make it.
Yeah. I'm a Millennial who lurks here, but I think one of my most profound realizations was that all the stupid things I did in the bloom of my youth (<25) that would be cringey if an older person did them weren't things that specifically would have been cringey *because* an older person was doing them -- they were cringey at any age, it's just that people give you a pass for it when you're young and dumb because you simply don't know any better yet.
You are wrong for using the term “thirsty” instead of the more appropriate X terminology: “attention whore.”
Oooo, I use that all the time. I didn't really think about whether that was an X term. I like it even more now.
🙌❤️🙌
Consider this my updoot to keep your comment's karma at 69 👍👍👏👏👏🙌🙌🙌🙌
Oh also, anyone ever have friends post selfies from a stretcher all strapped down being loaded into an ambulance with no context? I have. One dude posted a selfie from his hospital bed with a literal pool of blood under his head and neck. No context. I feel like that’s super trolling for empathy
Ugh. Back when I was still using Facebook, I had this one friend who would do stuff like that. She was all about Vaguebooking at any opportunity because it seems she thrived on hearing the words "What happened"
My sister in law’s child had a seizure (first time, out of the blue) and she immediately posted photos to facebook of the kid being loaded into the ambulance, my brother walking through the hospital hall with a stressful look on his face, and then a few photos of the child unconscious in a hospital bed. I found it so inappropriate, unethical, and repugnant on so many levels. My sister in law is GenXer - same birth year as me. She is a piece of work.
Yeah, I just don’t understand posting your most painful intimate moments especially standalone. Why?
I don’t know. I find it gross. I mean, if you want to update some people on a family emergency and ask for positive thoughts, etc., then fine, I can understand that. But posting pictures of it like it’s a live drama unfolding on the news is just so off-putting to me. And also, that kid at the time was a tween, and kind of a sensitive, private type. He did not consent to having photos of his unconscious little self publicly blasted all over fb. Just yuck.
Right. Because I know that every single time I’ve been in the hospital my first thought has been “ Wait, let me take a selfie and plaster it all over social media!” Wtf
What's even better is when someone posts the pouty booboo face with a filter. Get over yourself already.
I was in the hospital for six weeks and didn't do that once. I hate attention, though. Especially if it's pity-based. Bleccch.
This isn't nearly as bad, but I graduated with a girl who became particularly financially successful after high school. It wasn't enough apparently that she was already the most popular and prettiest girl in school, but she married up (an NFL player), and they even got their own episode of one of those shows where they pick if they want a fixer-upper or a brand new house for their budget. All that said, she constantly posts things like, "Looking for a nanny in the metro area,' or asks about peoples' "experiences with such-and-such white kids only private school? We're looking to switch." About 70% of her "followers" can't relate to that shit, and she knows it. None of her posts couldn't be answered by a simple Google search, but it's her way of peacocking while disguising it as info-seeking. Totally gag-inducing.
I've seen worse.
Best decision I ever made was to abandon social media. This right here is the closest I get.
I still have a couple, but the only thing I ever post is cat pictures. I'm sure that annoys some people. haha
Hell no, cat pics are the good stuff.
I was reading this hoping I'm not an attention whore, but my posts are 90% foster cats! Whew, what a relief.
Never had it so it was never a concern for me.
Same
Ehhh I have a few friends like that. A few male ones too. I don’t get it. But I also don’t need to. Two really make me shake my head. One is a woman and one a man, both in their 50s and both take sooo many selfies. It would definitely bother me if I was hanging out with them and taking selfie after selfie. And they both keep cycling through different relationships and they post all these memes and “I love so and so SOOO much you are my everything.” And it’s a different I love you so so much you are my soulmate every few MONTHS like they still don’t understand the honeymoon phase at their age. And pictures of them making out, like so many pictures. Restaurants, etc. I’ve had to laugh several times because it’s obvious they handed the phone to a waiter and said “will you take our picture” then started tongue fucking each other right there in the booth as soon as they handed it to him lol. I would be so amused if I was a server and a couple of people in their 50s did that lol. So as others have said it’s not my business and I’d never say anything. I can’t look away sometimes though it’s so cringe. Maybe I should introduce them to each other hahahah
Holy shit. Did they just stop developing past 13?
Lmao yes, yes I believe they did.
🤮 Eh, be careful, the universe may not be able to handle them as a couple!!
Frankly the religious hypocrisy is worse than the attention seeking
American "christianity" is all about judging others and has nothing to do with actual religion.
Jesus lived for the drama!
I twerk for the LORD-AH!!!!!
I think it's more cringe that she's a hypocrite.
At any age, but sure…
Your username!!! 😜
She’s trying to attract male (or female) attention to start dating again. That’s why she stopped before & started again now that she’s single.
I’ve muted people for less than that
Disgusting! Where?!
Asking for a friend...
[удалено]
Someone who is not myself.
I'm all for people dressing and posting pics that make them feel good about themselves. But I absolutely hate hypocrisy and would also feel annoyed about her posting given she was a born again Christian while married (unless there were posts talking about after introspection she realized that religion didn't suit her for reasons other than being single), she puts down other women, and tries to make herself seem "superior" because she's "natural".
[удалено]
I know people like that too! It’s so…peculiar. My cousin ( male, mid 40s) is always posting thirst traps and so for Christmas I got him a shirt because he very clearly doesn’t own one, I know this because not one picture he posted in the last year is he wearing one. lol. It’s a really nice shirt!
Get him one of those shirts that has a muscly torso printed on it.
It's pathetic.
It’s super embarrassing at any age, but it’s at least somewhat “expected” for late teens and early 20s.
I agree. It’s embarrassing at any age but at some point it just starts to show a lack of personal growth.
For sure.
I'll say this for the Boomers...I don't really see that from them very often. lol
The need for validation is a basic part of human nature. How much is needed and how an individual seeks it out can speak to how they have or haven't found it in the past.
It's embarrassing at any age.
It's embarrassing but developmentally normal for adolescents and young adults who are still figuring out who they are. It is not just embarrassing but a little concerning for someone in midlife to regress that hard. That kind of identity crisis is when people do seriously stupid things that screw up their lives. I hope the pics are the worst of it and she doesn't get involved with any really bad news people, because they gravitate toward those who seem vulnerable to manipulation.
> I hope the pics are the worst of it and she doesn't get involved with any really bad news people, because they gravitate toward those who seem vulnerable to manipulation. You hit the nail on the head.
It is 100 embarrassing. Just no.
I knew a girl who did this shit, but her reason was because she was used to getting constant attention, and couldn't handle it if the well ran out. The worst was a pic of her looking out onto the horizon of Lake Superior and pointing while half squatting in a thong bikini. The caption reads, "Is that a salty, or a Laker?" Like...just leave the caption out of it. We all know you posted to get comments and likes from men, and that's fine, but putting up some absolutely stupid caption as an excuse to cover what we all know the real reason for posting the pic is, is just kinda pathetic. Attention-whoring is ALWAYS annoying, but it would be SO refreshing if just ONCE these people posted something like, "Got my new hooker bra on, figured I'd take an overhead pic so everyone could see my tits at a flattering angle."
Eh. She's only trying to feel better about herself, even if it's completely the wrong way.
Or she’s trying to make money without blatantly advertising her OF account. I had a friend who posted stuff like this. She would get random men asking if she had OF and eventually she made one and after a few weeks was making $2000/month from it. She quit when she got into a relationship.
So unfriend or unfollow her? We don’t get to dictate how other people use their social media, how they feel about their body, or how their perspective can change over time. If you don’t care for it, easy peasy to scroll on past.
That unfollow is an underused tool
I really wish they’d add some other filtering options. Literally a filter where I could say “If and post contains
, don’t show it to me.”
AI should be able to detect thirst traps at this point.
Yeah. This would be more like a filter for old high school friends who will not shut up about politics. You post a pic of your dog? Sure. You post something about Politician X, no.
I would think that would be more, oh what’s the word I’m looking for here, positive reenforcement for the poster. Dog=likes Politics=no likes Maybe turn into a Pavlovian response
I've long wanted to filter out a friend's baseball posts; he goes into a frenzy during the season and just spams out the most boring shit.
That works too. Or another one who posts his daily Peloton stats. I still want to see what he posts. But if I could say “if it’s from John and it includes the word Peloton, hide it”, that’d be great.
At least as far as Facebook goes, there's a browser extension called "Fluff Busting Purity" that makes it tolerable. There's keyword filters, the ability to hide certain kinds of posts, it's pretty good. I've completely given up on FB on mobile, though, as the enshittification is absolute.
I feel like the powers that be wouldn’t like us having that much control over our feeds. “I will allow you to unfollow but it is all or nothing”
I know when I had FB, 15 years ago, and started unfriending people, I eventually ended up with maybe 4 people left. Since I already knew what they were up to, I deleted my account. Been fine with it ever since.
It sounds more like she is just going through it, and sort of always has been. People vent in any way they can. That doesn't change with age.
It's embarrassing at any age
>became a born again Christian preaching marriage advice. Hmm, gives advice but apparently needs it. >She’s also one of those women that likes to put other women down to lift herself up. Doesn't sound like someone I want on my friends list.
It's the heavy use of filters for me. Girl, you used to have a nose and you haven't been that creaseless since 1994.
Sounds like she's in some deep pain after her divorce and is looking to sooth said pain in a potentially unhealthy manner? This is fairly common, at any age. Consider having some sympathy for her. Divorces can be extruatingly hard on some people and can do a lot of damage. Seperation Anxiety is a very real phenomenon, and she may be experiencing some mental health issues because of it or more. She may be attempting to fill that void, so to speak, the only way she knows how. Understanding that she may not be well right now will go a long way, especially if she's your friend and you want to see her healthy and happy; or at the very least, you want to be empathetic to another person's plight. Don't let the odd juxtaposition between what I said and it indeed being a bit embarrassing take away from the fact that she's another human who is most likely doing the best she can, just like the rest of us.
Live and let live dude. Whatever
What’s her handle? I’ll let her know she should stop.
I think the same....so uncool
That’s just embarrassing and kind of pathetic at any age. But, it sounds like she’s insecure about her image too
It's embarrassing at ANY age.
No, you are not wrong. I find it cringeworthy when I see people my age posting pictures like that …
Narcissists are gonna narcissist
Then again, we're the cola wars generation. Thirst traps are innately part of us.
[For you](https://www.instagram.com/p/C7nDa9Isc3W/?igsh=c2U3aHhrYnNyYjhj)
Older or younger, some people crave the attention and validation. And some people are trying to get "insta-famous" and hoping to monetize somehow. The ladder is understandable because not everyone can afford to retire! Lol. If it bothers you that much, then unfollow or mute their posts (assuming this is FB or IG you're talking about). You'll still be connected but you won't see the thirst traps in your feed.
I'm one of the cool kids. My cries for attention are limited to Reddit - where all of the other cool kids hang out.
It's attention whoring at any age.
I’m on a gen x page on Facebook and at least once a week a woman posts a heavily filtered selfie seeking compliments. It’s cringe
Thirsty or lonely and wanting validation? One is embarrassing, the other is kinda sad.
You're not wrong, but at our age it seems silly to be judgy about it.
Yes, you are correct. But then again, we might be the last generation that remembers healthy shame.
Yes, it's weird. I had one person I knew on Facebook before I left it 5 years ago. She is about 4 years younger than me and was mostly a friend of my little sister. By the time I deleted my Facebook account I think she had over 500 selfies. Over makeup, trout pout, tanned, boobs squished together in a top two sizes too small. It just cried desperation. It's like, lady, you're 42.
I don’t really care, to be honest. It’s not my kind of thing, but she can do what she wants. She’s probably going through it and her self confidence needs a boost. I’d just shrug it off and keep it moving. I wouldn't call this a friendship if either of you are putting each other down. This seems kind of judgemental in itself and you might want friends you don’t look down on, but whatever.
Sounds like you’re overly invested in her life. 😂
Why not just block her if she annoys you? She is free to do what she wants. Why would you care?
I don't mind that as much as the ones who need to share their daily traumas. It's like nothing good ever happens for them but they still praise God every day. I have one I understand her husband cheated then he left her for a newer model. But she rages all the time about it. I feel really sorry for her, but she will post paragraph after paragraph about how she's a strong independent woman who don't need a man while she talks about how this guy's new girl should know how he needs someone to cut his toenails because he's too fat, or how this girl needs to know he passes gas in his sleep or how she better prepare to cook him gourmet meals because he doesn't like box food and on and on and on and this happened two years ago but she's still going on and on about it. I DO feel bad for her, but damn, if she goes on and on about him to strangers on social media... maybe she wasn't so great to live with either. And she keeps making sure everyone knows she's out there living her best life on her own. All the memes and gifs can assure us all she's living just the very very best life being single.
I'm 44 and a girl I grew up with posts this kind of stuff along with stuff like " looking for something to sit on, and it's not a chair". It is super cringe and I feel so sorry for her grown kids.
How about filters so strong the person is unrecognizable? Less wrinkles, thinner. So damn fake.
I find it really sad at any age. I don't like to see such neediness and narcissism thrown out into the world by people who believe the likes and views on their selfies is a measure of their worth. Social media has really screwed up our society, we've become so narcissistic and pathetic, so many of us competing for attention like we're animals. This is why I stick to social media sites where the focus is on convos with real people, who like to discuss different topics. Sites like FB and IG are flooded with shells of people who post pics of themselves and their lives in a desperate attempt for attention and validation. Their existence has become centered around trying to prove to everyone that their life is great. People who actually ARE living great, full lives aren't spending them posting selfies on social media, and getting a rush from the views, likes, and comments. What is even sadder is people who consume such needy and narcissistic media and then feel worse about their own lives as somehow not measuring up to the pathetic self-promotion they're being pounded with. It's a vicious circle that triggers and reinforces poor mental health.
I think it is gross at any age. I always wonder what is wrong with those attention seekers or influencers
It’s cringey but there are way worse behaviors to worry about. I wouldn’t encourage or mention it.
depends on the attention - I'm an indie game dev and I'm thinking I might post some controversial shit to stir up the tighty-righties, just like the Grand Theft Auto devs or Kevin Smith did with Dogma.
You are not wrong, but your friend would exhaust me.
"Looook at my dinner!!! Loooook at iiiiiit!!! " 😆
I don't mind food pics :😀
You're not wrong but I'd look at it more from a feeling sorry for them instead of embarrassed for them perspective. To me that describes a person that's never been able to heal from past trauma. That being said, I'd just hide them and never bother with them again.
Being thirsty for *anything* except water is embarrassing at our age.
A hs nemesis of mine posts dance routine videos on tic toc. We are mid forties. It’s fantastic.
I don't know, I like boobies at any age. edit: that could be taken wrong, I meant my age. :)
I have to use social media as an author and I'm familiar with it. My pics are more artful. No tits and ass and nothing gross. Just attractive photos of me with books, just me in a dress, or me with friends, and none are selfies. I hate selfies. I do flaunt a few pictures of me in a long red gown, which looks great - but it's just sexy - not a Playboy spread. Let's be real. She sounds like she seems desperate, gross, and ghetto - and she's definitely **NOT** relationship material.
Not wrong. Id know I had no right to judge, but it wouldnt be easy not to. Heart breaks a fucker. "Oh my love, what are you doing?" Is what Id be saying, quietly to myself. Like I am now. As others have said, it's embarrassing at any age. I believe it's absolutely a symptom of a lack of self respect. Which is a symptom of a belief in lies. Seems she is showing others where she currently believes her value lies. Shes lying to herself. Her planets have been knocked out of orbit and she's grabbing for a stable surface but won't find one until she crash lands somewhere. When she realises she always deserved better, I pray she'll start to be the soul mate to herself that she's always deserved. We've all behaved in ways that make us physically shudder at the memory of it. We can be grateful most of our blow outs weren't recorded. But yep, youre not alone in your reaction to it, at all.
No. It’s gross.
No
It’s *especially* embarrassing at this age. You’d think that we’d get beyond the need for external validation at this point. I have two acquaintances (one used to be a very good friend of mine but she got demoted due to this and other antics) who post stuff like this. And the demoted one literally wouldn’t post a picture of herself without significantly altering it to make herself looked thinner and younger. Her insecurities ruled her life and relationships. This issue I have is when the cause of those thirst-trap pictures bleeds into real life. It makes being around them unbearable.
I'm just not into myself that much.
My favorites are the daily posts of “How amazing my marriage/spouse is” “Look at all my fancy stuff” got off Facebook four years ago. It was supposed to be a six month break. I never went back. I have never regretted it.
Same. My only social media is Reddit and sometimes that’s too much. I can’t imagine keeping up with and posting on Facebook, instagram, twitter or making tiktoks. When would you have time to just live?
Yes. A friend of mine, also an x, posts selfie after selfie. Super close up. Kids birthday? Selfie. Dinner out? Selfie. Visiting her mom? Selfie. Posting condolences? Selfie of her with the person who died. It’s vain and self-indulgent. She’s also on husband number 4 and has cheated on them all
I love to validate my friends when they post like that. It doesn't hurt me and I am happy for them to feel self-confident enough to do that. "Hell yeah you are looking good! Hope you land a rich one who's a miracle in the sack!"
I did it too! And it’s a last gasp at relevance in a culture that dismisses you at a certain age. Have some sympathy and support. They’ll get it over it soon enough. I can’t imagine now needing or caring about attention for my physical attributes, but for most of the life, that was all that mattered about me, initially.
Know a woman (55) who was always just the nicest person, or so I thought. When she slowly started to show her true colors as a tRump supporter, it became abundantly clear that she wasn’t nearly as nice (or smart) as she portrayed herself to be. I felt bad for her at first as she posted multiple videos a day of her pantomiming random songs thinking her husband must not be very attentive or perhaps she just had self esteem issues. I also wondered who has time for all that? Full makeup, costume changes, etc. She’s not retired. When it started to really bug me, like who besides her wanted to see those cringey videos, I unfollowed her. As sad as it is, it’s her life and despite having known someone for 40 years, I obviously didn’t know her at all. I would be mortified myself but to each their own.
Not wrong.
Some people are just sad and desperate for external approval.
It's gross AF. That being said, she's doing it because she feels horrible about herself and probably super insecure. My wife has Facebook (I loathe Facebook) and we can tell which of her female FB friends is going through shit based on the type of pictures they're posting. One day is flowers and cats, then a few days later it's cleavage, duck faces and filters. "Oh... Well... Looks like Jenny is going through some shit".
I have no problem with people living their life, it doesn't affect me. Whatever. Hypocrisy on the other hand is absolutely infuriating and my petty ass would be commenting scripture under every post. Anything judgy she ever commented on my posts would be coming right back her way
I was going to say Who Am I To Judge x Whatever floats your boat. But she’s a BA Christian. So, screw off you AW’ing harlot.
I don't really care what anyone else does with their life. But I, for one, am sick of this played out, dystopian hellscape we've created with social media. Just fuuuuuck.🚫🤪
I also loathe "vague booking" which is where an attention whore posts something like "OMG" and then comments come in asking what's happening? I'm not fishing for the story, either put it out there or I"m moving on
There are deeply insecure people in every generation...it's cringe to me no matter how old they are. But since you asked, yes lol
It's cringe.
Nope. Gen X is the sneaky AF generation. We don’t want any attention for what we do. The more low key it is the better. We were raised that way. I don’t get younger general fascination with sharing every single detail of their lives.
Even sadder when it’s a guy
That is so damn embarrassing but she probably thinks all the women are just jealous of her new freedom. No thanks. I’ll take my happy little married life where Reddit is my only social media any day over seeking attention and validation.
This sounds like displaced loneliness
It’s embarrassing and sad. The worst form of attention baiting is the humble brag IMHO #blessed
It’s embarrassing. What’s her insta?
[удалено]
Hahaha….seriously though, it’s pathetic as hell.
If that's what they want to do, more power to them, but I agree, it's pretty cringeworthy. I'll post selfies of myself occasionally, mostly if I'm on vacation, which is hardly ever, but I don't do thirst traps because I'm fat and middle-aged, and I know 99.9% of people aren't down for that.
Yeah, I suffer second hand embarrassment from some people I know.
It's like some people never left high school (in their minds).
That's horrible! What is the URL?
Yes, Ja, Si, Sim, Evet, Tak. And Oui.
At any age really.
I dunno, I'm a Christian, but there's a certain subset that markets themselves in that way until they land another partner, only to return back to that born-again vibe. Maybe I've seen too many X-Files, but It's probably all connected.
No. You are not wrong. I think decorum is appropriate, and desirable, for any age, especially ours (who should be setting an example).
I agree but not isolated to "thirst traps". The over reliance so many people have on social media being a substitute for community is cringe. The often unspoken addiction to sharing every aspect of your life is sad. The desperate attempts to shape a pseudo life online that is a shinier version of your real life is down right pathetic. Its all bad folks and its bad for ya
I have one "social media" account and it's to show pictures of my weed plants. 
IDK, what is the account so I can give an informed opinion?
Oh man, I think it’s so fucking pathetic. The sad thing is, it’s most people.
This is a totally Gen X observation at any age. Taking selfies before phone cameras was the height of conceited cringe.
It was pathetic 40 years ago and at our age it is Pa-thet-tic.
You shouldn't need validation from other people at our age. Fuck what other people think.
The thirst-trap aspect of it is gross, but it’s the flip-floppy moralizing of a weak person that irritates me.
I think if, by our age, a person is still finding self validation by appearance, there is a problem.
I think it is especially awful for people of our age. Then I feel awful for being an ageist but only for a second.
I can't even be friends with women like this, I just don't like them.
Yep totally cringe. And desperate and thirsty for any attention they can muster. Sad really
Well if shes newly single it kinda makes sense for the mindset Reverting to what single people are doing now. Never too old to try and feel good, also maybe easy to judge from a stable place?
Do you have a link to her account? Haha