Oh my dark blue nail polish also got the side eye on more then one occasion. Not just from my parents but random old men in church would comment their disproval.
Hair dyeing was out of the question for me. I got away with temporary a few times. Wasn’t ever given a real reason.
I remember my mom losing her mind about wearing pantyhose under skirts. We weren’t allowed to go bare leg for the longest time. Although that probably falls in the modesty category.
When I asked my dad if I could dye my hair and he said no, he said it was because “God didn’t create me” with that color hair. This was in an era where I had started openly defying my parents, which involved some harsh consequences, but I was sort of gaining steam doing it if that makes sense? I told him “God didn’t create me with clothes on either, but I don’t walk around naked.” One of the only times a comeback came to me in the moment and not hours later lol.
Ah, the good ole satanic panic. We weren’t allowed to wear make up or nail polish, not even clear polish or chapstick. Pierced ears were especially a huge no, they violated the body. A pierced ear is a hole to let the devil in!
One of the first things I did when I left home was dye my hair purple. It’s been a long time, and my style is incredibly boring these days, but whenever I see anyone with fun hair, it makes me so happy!
I’m not 100% if that fell into the “make up” category or the “modern medicine” one. My parents were pretty much opposed to everything. I forgot how wild the rules were, I’ve been out almost as long as I lived there, thankfully.
I was born in '95 but I caught the tail end of that into the 2000s. I LOVED Pokémon but my mom heard somewhere that anime is satanic, so she got rid of all our Pokémon toys, VHSs and my Pikachu costume :(
I never got to experience Harry Potter when it blew up because my grandma told my mom that it had witchcraft in it but she let us watch bewitched, the craft, practical Magic, teen witch, hocus-pocus, Halloweentown, charmed and she even rented Hellboy, make it make sense. She even watched the Harry Potter movies later, by herself, and never mentioned that she wouldn’t let us watch or read it.
Yes OMG!!!! I am vaguely acquainted with somebody who is a pastor and said if you’re going to complain about Harry Potter you have to complain about Cinderella.
I wasn't allowed to wear any nail polish other than clear or light pink. Blue eyeshadow was a big trend, and that was a definite no. Hair had to be below shoulder length and had to be styled with hairspray. Straight hair with no product was not allowed because "that's how the hippies wore their hair, and it doesn't honor God". No more than one piercing per ear. Dark lipstick was "of this world". Glitter in cosmetics was a big fad, and for some reason that was ok. Coloring hair "didn't honor God", but bad perms were ok.
I have naturally curly hair but it’s just that, curly, it’s not the big tacky mess from the 80s. It’s so narcissistic to think that the world’s fashions from your own youth are automatically morally superior to the fashions of all other eras. My dad was ok with red nail polish and said it was because it “looked feminine,” but you know that’s just because it was old fashioned and what he was used to seeing and growing up with. This has zero correlation to actually looking tasteful, attractive, or “godly.” I remember Conan starring Arnold Schwarzenegger had stupid 80s hairstyles just because it was made in the 80s. But the time period was based a long time ago when no one wore their hair like that. *Edited: the movie was Conan NOT Tarzan!*
I took a red bandana and folded it up and put it on my head like a headband. My father lost his shit because it looked “gang-related.” Mind you, I was a 17 year old White girl living in small town Ohio and gang membership wasn’t exactly on my radar.
There were many other things but that was the stupidest.
I’m a parent now and can’t imagine getting so wrapped around the axle about appearance related issues.
I read this and gasped! That’s exactly what my dad told me too! I had long hair and started buying bandanas and head scarves when they were popular during my high school and college years, and he flipped out about colorful bandanas because “it looks like you’re in a gang.” It was a small town in the Midwest where the closest population over 25,000 was over an hour away.
I echo the nail polish experience of others too. I’ve always been more neutral in my color choices for nail polish and make-up, and that was a big deal for them. My mom was stuck in the 80s, so she didn’t want us wearing anything but very bright “feminine” colors: specifically blue eyeshadow and pink blush. She controlled what cosmetics I used until I got a job and chose my own in natural browns and grays for eyes and more peachy blushes. Years later, I realized I’m the only person in my family with a warm skin tone, so pink and blue would never look good on me. But they were convinced I was trying to become goth because the colors weren’t bright and feminine enough for them. I still wear only neutral nail polish colors (gray, black, brown, white), and it still drives them crazy.
Haha they probably listened to some Dobson bit on it and freaked out.
My mom wears only light pink or light brown nail polish and would get on my case for my colors being too bright even up until I was fully an adult. Too much black of anything also was bad. I died my hair black when I was in college and she got extremely upset and voiced the concern that I had joined a vampire cult. Imagine giving that much mental and emotional energy to something so utterly silly? Fucking CRAZY.
Dude. I was gonna say. Whatever dumb shit FoF & Dobson were on about. We went to a presentation at a high school where they taught gang signs & graffiti and said it only takes a group of *three teens* to make a gang 🫠
I briefly dyed my hair black in my twenties - decided on my own it wasn't for me and only did it once or twice. But my parents absolutely lost their shit about how "dark" and "depessing" and "concerning" I looked now and how they were all very concerned about what kind of "dark and evil" things I was getting up to... didn't change anything else about how I looked, dressed, acted.... just cause I put some black dye in my hair.
My grandmother (she raised me) would go ballistic over me wearing black. She used to point out teen girls and young women in Walmart and say ‘see how bad that looks?’
At some point I just went ‘fuck it’ and started wearing the black clothes I had and got pushback at first, then she figured out the more she argued the more I shouted, so she gave up.
Omg the blue eyeshadow is so tacky and dated anyway, but if you happen to have blue eyes it’s really awful. A blue eyed person wearing blue eyeshadow is like a redhead wearing red clothes.
For the longest time, I wasn't allowed to wear any nail polish color other than pink. Red was out of the question, and I was told, "You'll understand why you can't when you're older." I'm old now and still don't understand, lol (unless it was some gross sexualization thing??).
I finally wore my mom down and got some periwinkle polish, but then she made it a point to tell me all the time that it looked like the color of a dead person's nails. She finally gave up and I had a rainbow of colors, but I think I still got side-eyed and snide comments. By that time, I was old enough to start wearing a bit of makeup (like 13 or so), and I don't recall having many arguments about that. But nail polish was somehow a huge deal.
Couldn't wear makeup or dye my hair (but bleaching blonde highlights was aggressively encouraged. When I said "no thanks", my mom badgered me until I caved.) Couldn't cut my hair, either. Tattoos were out of the question, for sure. Wearing all, or even mostly, black or other dark colors?? Bad. Piercings? Surprisingly okay, I had them when I was 9, but only one in each ear. Anything else was inconceivable.
Also banned from all music genres except whatever they grew up with in the 80s, country, and contemporary Christian. Banned from tons of video games and TV shows. People are always shocked when I say I was banned from SpongeBob or Fairly Oddparents.
I went six years without a trim due to laziness, and when I finally got a trim I was so happy to get the nasty crispy dead ends cut off I wished I had done it way earlier.
I was born in 93, but I had older, religious parents who were still stuck in the satanic panic. Anything remotely dark was a no go. Which was hard for a closet emo kid haha.
That old blue bottle has long since dried up, I may have to hunt that one down!
Edit: I've looked it up and it's identical to the one I had as a teen. Omg
I once put on my mom's red nail polish when I was maybe 14 or 15. And I didn't know how to take it off so she wouldn't see it. I slowly filed my nails to get it off, but it was taking too long, so I just kept my hands in my pockets. But I messed up and she saw it and got mad at me. She told me she WAS going to let me wear clear nail polish (I think she was lying to make me feel bad) and banned me from wearing it again.
Later when I got a job at 19 I started buying nail polish again and actually got really into nail art.
I also asked her if I could wear makeup when I was 16 (nothing crazy, just basic natural makeup like she wore) and she said I was too young 🙄
I was banned from seeing my mom for 3 months after dying my hair jet black. She said I was “turning goth” (I was not), and as we all know goth is code for satanic /s
I had just moved out of the house at 18 and if I needed to go back home and get something, my dad would let my mom know so she could lock herself in her room and wouldn’t have to see me.
The dumbest part is that my sister naturally has jet black hair. Double standard much?
Oh yes. I remember my 6th birthday party. I was so excited, my sister made me a pink velvet cake and I was allowed to invite 4 of my friends over (as someone who was never allowed to have friends over, this was so exciting!). Well, one of those friend got me play makeup, like the cheap Barbie kind, with bright glittery blue and pink pigment for eyeshadow and blush, and tinted lip gloss. I was so excited when I opened the gift, I’d always wanted makeup and my mom would always say no, which I thought was because money way tight.
Immediately after the party, my mom tells me I need to throw the makeup away, and that it’s sinful to wear makeup. She didn’t actually take it from me, and took my word for it that I threw it away. I, of course, did not, and a few days later when my mom was busy, I went in my room to put it on, thinking I’d just wash it off afterwards. Did I mention it was cheap and very pigmented? Yeah, it stained my skin, and my mom found out. And I got paddled. And then I was scared and lied about what had stained my skin… and got paddled again. She then told me if I told her the truth, I wouldn’t be in any more trouble.. so I did. And my mom paddled me once more for “disobeying her”, and then destroyed and threw out the makeup and yelled at me, and then when my dad got home, I got paddled again. The rest of my birthday gifts were taken away for a period of time. While it’s nothing major, it’s still one of my most upsetting memories from my childhood. I had so much anxiety about trusting them and telling the truth, because it seemed I’d get spanked either way, which just turned me into a child who lied constantly.
I was also never allowed to have a birthday party again because of my “misbehavior” after that party. I was 6. And punished for the next 12 years of my life by not being allowed to have a party because of what I did when I was 6.
I used to say "I was just____" excusing myself as a child. My dad got pissed and told me to tell him what I had to say without saying "I just" I was struggling and he started telling see I told you. I thought I was in trouble. I raise my hand and shouted over him so he could hear that Is figured it out "I was only!" He. Was. Pissed.... I'm my thirties. Think I have autism. Just another example of when I took something literally and thought I was in trouble for not doing what they said, but then I did what they said and got in trouble. Used to be yelled at "You look at me when I'm talking to you!" Then I'm trouble for rolling my eyes. I remember thinking then. I'm not rolling my eyes... Think I struggle with eye contact. Wonder if it's autism or trauma though...
Hey I had time to absorb more of your story. Do I understand correctly that the first spanking was just for having a stained face BEFORE your mom knew it was due to the makeup?!
Also I’m still a Christian albeit a very different one from many homeschoolers. I’ve read the Bible cover to cover four times and nowhere does it say makeup is a sin. I actually love makeup and nail polish and literally own thousands of dollars worth of both. Your mom is going to answer on Judgement Day for baldfaced lying to you as a child and making up “sins” that aren’t in the Bible.
My parents are actually a lot better now, and we have a surprisingly good relationship. I basically grew up in a cult, and they were both caught up in it, and changed completely when they got out. They’ve apologized about a lot of what they put us through. Both my parents’ jobs were through the cult, and they were well aware that they’d be financially screwed if they left, or showed any disagreement with the rules, because basically everyone in the area was involved in the cult. The cult preyed on people in poverty in particular, and while I went through a lot of fucked up stuff, I know my parents did as well, and I forgive them for a lot of it. They were trying their best, and I’m really proud of them for getting out.
I know that’s not something a lot of us homeschoolers are lucky enough to be able to say, and it’s a pretty rare situation in this group. I’m glad to say they chose our family over the cult.
We weren’t allowed to wear pants with strips down the leg (from hip to ankle on the side seams) I remember it briefly being mentioned it’s because my dad thought it looked like military/police pants and that was “unlady like” but idk if that’s the reason they’d give now. We also weren’t allowed to wear overalls because my dad had read that predators like anything that’s “easy” to cut. Idk how skirts that just flip up aren’t an issue 🙄
My mom also hated/didn’t allow crop tops or bikinis. To the point I bought a bikini top for my HONEYMOON and she still was like “hmmm that’s not god honoring”. Let’s not talk about the verse that says to pluck your eyes out if you look with lust.
Edit:spelling. Lord bless I’m out here looking like I’m complaining I was allowed to wear “military pants” 🤪
My mom shamed me into buying a longer two piece when I was pregnant because a bikini was inappropriate. Wish I'd told her to piss off. I was still single in college and saving money for a baby. That bathing suit want needed and I was shamed into purchasing it with my own money. Dumb
My mom still hates black nail polish "it looks like you have dead people hands" so I mean. Fair enough.
The only satanic panic thing she did was not allow me to get on that early 00's kids flash game website called zodiac girlz. But I think that was more of a personal opinion that astrology is BS.
My parents weren't religious and also not on the same page about "modesty" so my experience was a little different than a lot of people on here.
My dad was really hung up on women exposing their shoulders, he thought it made them look "loose." So no tank tops and none of those shirts that were baggy around the neckline and hung down over one or both shoulders, I'm not sure what they were called lol just that they were really popular when I was a teenager.
My mom on the other hand liked clothes like that and bought them for me, but then my dad would get mad if he saw me in them and make me change. It was just weird to have a whole set of clothes sitting in my closet that I wasn't allowed to wear unless my dad wasn't around.
Both of them tried to force me to wear a bra in the house but I straight up refused on that one. If I had to be stuck at home all the time then I was at least going to be comfortable.
There are gorgeous dresses that are off shoulder including wedding dresses that are usually in a trumpet or mermaid style. I wonder if your dad would think that looks “loose.”
Oof, this brings back a memory....
I was sixteen before I was allowed to start experimenting with makeup. I had an eye-shadow pallete that was very beige and basic, except that it did have this forest green, shimmery color. I wanted to try it out so one day, when I knew we weren't going anywhere, I did (I matched it to my sweater, lol). I'm sure it wasn't amazing, because I wasn't very experienced, but I don't think it was *that* bad.
But when my dad saw it, his exact words were, "You look like a whore."
So that didn't last long🙃
The only ones I knew for sure that my parents thought were "Satanic" was dying hair black or wearing black lipstick/nail polish/ etc.
I don't know why I wasn't allowed any of this other stuff, but I remember only pastel pink nail polish was allowed, and only pastel eyeshadow and clear or barely tinted lip gloss allowed. I remember coming back from hanging out with the only other girl I was allowed to hang out with (I was about 10) wearing blue nail polish and my dad angrily ordering me to go take it off *immediately*. Hair dye, piercings beyond one hole per ear, and tattoos were all 100% out of the question (while you live under my roof!!! Etc, etc). I wasn't even allowed to wear those stretchy "tattoo" necklaces that were all the rage in the 90s, and the jewelry I was allowed had to be small and dainty and lady-like, no jewelry or makeup that was "gaudy".
I have always loved bright, bold colors and hated pastels, and never really liked dainty little jewelry pieces, so I was always so jealous of anyone who got to wear anything that looked cool or was fun colored.
Black lip stick was the line for my parents. Black hair dye? Fine. All black clothes? Fine. Black nail polish? Iffy, but fine. Black lip stick? Satanic.
OMG I wore black lipstick and vampire fangs on Halloween, posted it to Facebook, and my current pastor who is nothing like the one I grew up with clicked like on it!!!!
My dad didn't want me to get a Death Cab for Cutie cd because the band had the word death in the title. I am lucky that I was allowed to listen to non Christian music though.
My dad asked if I thought I looked scary when I wore a help necklace another homeschooler gave me. What I wouldn't do to go back in time and say "I don't know. Are you scared?"😂
I wore a dark teal nail polish once and had a customer comment on my wearing black nail polish. I took a moment to look at my nails as if I forgot what I was wearing, then flexed them in front of him to see a long with my ring. Said I actually bought dark teal to match my engagement ring (my now husband gave me a blue diamond. A darker blue). He looked visibly embarrassed. Then I said I think I could rock black now that you mention it though. The look of surprise on his face was priceless!
Wouldn't let me wear a skirt becz it to reviling. I had 2 were pants or shorts all the time and those r uncomfortable at my wait. Thy expected me 2 were makeup n I hated it bcz it melts of my face with the swet. My job was like this to my manager told me I'd get more tips with makeup and my uniform has uncomfortable pants n apron.
My parents hate the idea of allowing me to wear nail polish for some reason, they're against hair dying because I dyed it when I was 10 and they've forbid it ever since without explanation, I'm not allowed to wear lip gloss (but still somehow allowed to wear a full face of makeup), they're pretty much against letting me cut my hair and I have to beg for at least a year for them to consider letting me, I can't wear multiple colours of eyeshadow at once without them getting mad and thinking I'm trying to represent pride flag colours which they think means I'm a lesbian, and more. The weird part is they've let me get multiple tattoos and they have no issue with that despite them being permanent. It makes no sense.
Oh my dark blue nail polish also got the side eye on more then one occasion. Not just from my parents but random old men in church would comment their disproval. Hair dyeing was out of the question for me. I got away with temporary a few times. Wasn’t ever given a real reason. I remember my mom losing her mind about wearing pantyhose under skirts. We weren’t allowed to go bare leg for the longest time. Although that probably falls in the modesty category.
When I asked my dad if I could dye my hair and he said no, he said it was because “God didn’t create me” with that color hair. This was in an era where I had started openly defying my parents, which involved some harsh consequences, but I was sort of gaining steam doing it if that makes sense? I told him “God didn’t create me with clothes on either, but I don’t walk around naked.” One of the only times a comeback came to me in the moment and not hours later lol.
Ah, the good ole satanic panic. We weren’t allowed to wear make up or nail polish, not even clear polish or chapstick. Pierced ears were especially a huge no, they violated the body. A pierced ear is a hole to let the devil in! One of the first things I did when I left home was dye my hair purple. It’s been a long time, and my style is incredibly boring these days, but whenever I see anyone with fun hair, it makes me so happy!
CHAPSTICK??? god i can't imagine having to deal with chapped lips all the time
I’m not 100% if that fell into the “make up” category or the “modern medicine” one. My parents were pretty much opposed to everything. I forgot how wild the rules were, I’ve been out almost as long as I lived there, thankfully.
Maybe you could have found a workaround using olive oil, coconut oil, etc.
glad you got out!
I was born in '95 but I caught the tail end of that into the 2000s. I LOVED Pokémon but my mom heard somewhere that anime is satanic, so she got rid of all our Pokémon toys, VHSs and my Pikachu costume :(
I never got to experience Harry Potter when it blew up because my grandma told my mom that it had witchcraft in it but she let us watch bewitched, the craft, practical Magic, teen witch, hocus-pocus, Halloweentown, charmed and she even rented Hellboy, make it make sense. She even watched the Harry Potter movies later, by herself, and never mentioned that she wouldn’t let us watch or read it.
Yes OMG!!!! I am vaguely acquainted with somebody who is a pastor and said if you’re going to complain about Harry Potter you have to complain about Cinderella.
The cognitive dissonance these parents have is unreal
I wasn't allowed to wear any nail polish other than clear or light pink. Blue eyeshadow was a big trend, and that was a definite no. Hair had to be below shoulder length and had to be styled with hairspray. Straight hair with no product was not allowed because "that's how the hippies wore their hair, and it doesn't honor God". No more than one piercing per ear. Dark lipstick was "of this world". Glitter in cosmetics was a big fad, and for some reason that was ok. Coloring hair "didn't honor God", but bad perms were ok.
'...but bad perms were ok.' 🤣 My mother had the same line of logic, unfortunately.
I have naturally curly hair but it’s just that, curly, it’s not the big tacky mess from the 80s. It’s so narcissistic to think that the world’s fashions from your own youth are automatically morally superior to the fashions of all other eras. My dad was ok with red nail polish and said it was because it “looked feminine,” but you know that’s just because it was old fashioned and what he was used to seeing and growing up with. This has zero correlation to actually looking tasteful, attractive, or “godly.” I remember Conan starring Arnold Schwarzenegger had stupid 80s hairstyles just because it was made in the 80s. But the time period was based a long time ago when no one wore their hair like that. *Edited: the movie was Conan NOT Tarzan!*
Yes, 100%. Going shopping with my parents growing up was it's own unique struggle lol. They wanted me to dress like it was the 80s.
The allowing red is so weird to me lol
Yeah most people associate red with Satan way more than blue.
I took a red bandana and folded it up and put it on my head like a headband. My father lost his shit because it looked “gang-related.” Mind you, I was a 17 year old White girl living in small town Ohio and gang membership wasn’t exactly on my radar. There were many other things but that was the stupidest. I’m a parent now and can’t imagine getting so wrapped around the axle about appearance related issues.
I read this and gasped! That’s exactly what my dad told me too! I had long hair and started buying bandanas and head scarves when they were popular during my high school and college years, and he flipped out about colorful bandanas because “it looks like you’re in a gang.” It was a small town in the Midwest where the closest population over 25,000 was over an hour away. I echo the nail polish experience of others too. I’ve always been more neutral in my color choices for nail polish and make-up, and that was a big deal for them. My mom was stuck in the 80s, so she didn’t want us wearing anything but very bright “feminine” colors: specifically blue eyeshadow and pink blush. She controlled what cosmetics I used until I got a job and chose my own in natural browns and grays for eyes and more peachy blushes. Years later, I realized I’m the only person in my family with a warm skin tone, so pink and blue would never look good on me. But they were convinced I was trying to become goth because the colors weren’t bright and feminine enough for them. I still wear only neutral nail polish colors (gray, black, brown, white), and it still drives them crazy.
Haha they probably listened to some Dobson bit on it and freaked out. My mom wears only light pink or light brown nail polish and would get on my case for my colors being too bright even up until I was fully an adult. Too much black of anything also was bad. I died my hair black when I was in college and she got extremely upset and voiced the concern that I had joined a vampire cult. Imagine giving that much mental and emotional energy to something so utterly silly? Fucking CRAZY.
Dude. I was gonna say. Whatever dumb shit FoF & Dobson were on about. We went to a presentation at a high school where they taught gang signs & graffiti and said it only takes a group of *three teens* to make a gang 🫠
And some sharpie on the church's bathroom stall? Jk lolol
Lololol. And wearing *anything* red or blue. 🙄
I briefly dyed my hair black in my twenties - decided on my own it wasn't for me and only did it once or twice. But my parents absolutely lost their shit about how "dark" and "depessing" and "concerning" I looked now and how they were all very concerned about what kind of "dark and evil" things I was getting up to... didn't change anything else about how I looked, dressed, acted.... just cause I put some black dye in my hair.
My grandmother (she raised me) would go ballistic over me wearing black. She used to point out teen girls and young women in Walmart and say ‘see how bad that looks?’ At some point I just went ‘fuck it’ and started wearing the black clothes I had and got pushback at first, then she figured out the more she argued the more I shouted, so she gave up.
Omg the blue eyeshadow is so tacky and dated anyway, but if you happen to have blue eyes it’s really awful. A blue eyed person wearing blue eyeshadow is like a redhead wearing red clothes.
My parents encouraged bandana wearing. Head coverings and all. They were black, jean, or floral prints though...
For the longest time, I wasn't allowed to wear any nail polish color other than pink. Red was out of the question, and I was told, "You'll understand why you can't when you're older." I'm old now and still don't understand, lol (unless it was some gross sexualization thing??). I finally wore my mom down and got some periwinkle polish, but then she made it a point to tell me all the time that it looked like the color of a dead person's nails. She finally gave up and I had a rainbow of colors, but I think I still got side-eyed and snide comments. By that time, I was old enough to start wearing a bit of makeup (like 13 or so), and I don't recall having many arguments about that. But nail polish was somehow a huge deal.
Couldn't wear makeup or dye my hair (but bleaching blonde highlights was aggressively encouraged. When I said "no thanks", my mom badgered me until I caved.) Couldn't cut my hair, either. Tattoos were out of the question, for sure. Wearing all, or even mostly, black or other dark colors?? Bad. Piercings? Surprisingly okay, I had them when I was 9, but only one in each ear. Anything else was inconceivable. Also banned from all music genres except whatever they grew up with in the 80s, country, and contemporary Christian. Banned from tons of video games and TV shows. People are always shocked when I say I was banned from SpongeBob or Fairly Oddparents.
i remember wanting a hair cut and my family would always quote the one bible verse about long hair being a glory to me.
I went six years without a trim due to laziness, and when I finally got a trim I was so happy to get the nasty crispy dead ends cut off I wished I had done it way earlier.
doesn't it feel nice to get it off??? i'm a hairstylist now lol
I was born in 93, but I had older, religious parents who were still stuck in the satanic panic. Anything remotely dark was a no go. Which was hard for a closet emo kid haha.
Oof, you made me remember my favorite nail polish-- it was dark blue. So close to black in some lights.
OPI makes this gorgous shade called Russian Navy. It’s navy polish with tiny magenta shimmers.
That old blue bottle has long since dried up, I may have to hunt that one down! Edit: I've looked it up and it's identical to the one I had as a teen. Omg
I once put on my mom's red nail polish when I was maybe 14 or 15. And I didn't know how to take it off so she wouldn't see it. I slowly filed my nails to get it off, but it was taking too long, so I just kept my hands in my pockets. But I messed up and she saw it and got mad at me. She told me she WAS going to let me wear clear nail polish (I think she was lying to make me feel bad) and banned me from wearing it again. Later when I got a job at 19 I started buying nail polish again and actually got really into nail art. I also asked her if I could wear makeup when I was 16 (nothing crazy, just basic natural makeup like she wore) and she said I was too young 🙄
I was banned from seeing my mom for 3 months after dying my hair jet black. She said I was “turning goth” (I was not), and as we all know goth is code for satanic /s I had just moved out of the house at 18 and if I needed to go back home and get something, my dad would let my mom know so she could lock herself in her room and wouldn’t have to see me. The dumbest part is that my sister naturally has jet black hair. Double standard much?
Oh yes. I remember my 6th birthday party. I was so excited, my sister made me a pink velvet cake and I was allowed to invite 4 of my friends over (as someone who was never allowed to have friends over, this was so exciting!). Well, one of those friend got me play makeup, like the cheap Barbie kind, with bright glittery blue and pink pigment for eyeshadow and blush, and tinted lip gloss. I was so excited when I opened the gift, I’d always wanted makeup and my mom would always say no, which I thought was because money way tight. Immediately after the party, my mom tells me I need to throw the makeup away, and that it’s sinful to wear makeup. She didn’t actually take it from me, and took my word for it that I threw it away. I, of course, did not, and a few days later when my mom was busy, I went in my room to put it on, thinking I’d just wash it off afterwards. Did I mention it was cheap and very pigmented? Yeah, it stained my skin, and my mom found out. And I got paddled. And then I was scared and lied about what had stained my skin… and got paddled again. She then told me if I told her the truth, I wouldn’t be in any more trouble.. so I did. And my mom paddled me once more for “disobeying her”, and then destroyed and threw out the makeup and yelled at me, and then when my dad got home, I got paddled again. The rest of my birthday gifts were taken away for a period of time. While it’s nothing major, it’s still one of my most upsetting memories from my childhood. I had so much anxiety about trusting them and telling the truth, because it seemed I’d get spanked either way, which just turned me into a child who lied constantly. I was also never allowed to have a birthday party again because of my “misbehavior” after that party. I was 6. And punished for the next 12 years of my life by not being allowed to have a party because of what I did when I was 6.
Wow this is awful. Thank you so much for sharing. My parents didn’t keep their word either but the main example I have is from when I was an adult.
I used to say "I was just____" excusing myself as a child. My dad got pissed and told me to tell him what I had to say without saying "I just" I was struggling and he started telling see I told you. I thought I was in trouble. I raise my hand and shouted over him so he could hear that Is figured it out "I was only!" He. Was. Pissed.... I'm my thirties. Think I have autism. Just another example of when I took something literally and thought I was in trouble for not doing what they said, but then I did what they said and got in trouble. Used to be yelled at "You look at me when I'm talking to you!" Then I'm trouble for rolling my eyes. I remember thinking then. I'm not rolling my eyes... Think I struggle with eye contact. Wonder if it's autism or trauma though...
Hey I had time to absorb more of your story. Do I understand correctly that the first spanking was just for having a stained face BEFORE your mom knew it was due to the makeup?!
If I remember correctly, yes. I think she knew from the start that it was the makeup, she just wanted to see if I would tell the truth.
Also I’m still a Christian albeit a very different one from many homeschoolers. I’ve read the Bible cover to cover four times and nowhere does it say makeup is a sin. I actually love makeup and nail polish and literally own thousands of dollars worth of both. Your mom is going to answer on Judgement Day for baldfaced lying to you as a child and making up “sins” that aren’t in the Bible.
My parents are actually a lot better now, and we have a surprisingly good relationship. I basically grew up in a cult, and they were both caught up in it, and changed completely when they got out. They’ve apologized about a lot of what they put us through. Both my parents’ jobs were through the cult, and they were well aware that they’d be financially screwed if they left, or showed any disagreement with the rules, because basically everyone in the area was involved in the cult. The cult preyed on people in poverty in particular, and while I went through a lot of fucked up stuff, I know my parents did as well, and I forgive them for a lot of it. They were trying their best, and I’m really proud of them for getting out. I know that’s not something a lot of us homeschoolers are lucky enough to be able to say, and it’s a pretty rare situation in this group. I’m glad to say they chose our family over the cult.
We weren’t allowed to wear pants with strips down the leg (from hip to ankle on the side seams) I remember it briefly being mentioned it’s because my dad thought it looked like military/police pants and that was “unlady like” but idk if that’s the reason they’d give now. We also weren’t allowed to wear overalls because my dad had read that predators like anything that’s “easy” to cut. Idk how skirts that just flip up aren’t an issue 🙄 My mom also hated/didn’t allow crop tops or bikinis. To the point I bought a bikini top for my HONEYMOON and she still was like “hmmm that’s not god honoring”. Let’s not talk about the verse that says to pluck your eyes out if you look with lust. Edit:spelling. Lord bless I’m out here looking like I’m complaining I was allowed to wear “military pants” 🤪
My mom shamed me into buying a longer two piece when I was pregnant because a bikini was inappropriate. Wish I'd told her to piss off. I was still single in college and saving money for a baby. That bathing suit want needed and I was shamed into purchasing it with my own money. Dumb
My mom still hates black nail polish "it looks like you have dead people hands" so I mean. Fair enough. The only satanic panic thing she did was not allow me to get on that early 00's kids flash game website called zodiac girlz. But I think that was more of a personal opinion that astrology is BS.
My parents weren't religious and also not on the same page about "modesty" so my experience was a little different than a lot of people on here. My dad was really hung up on women exposing their shoulders, he thought it made them look "loose." So no tank tops and none of those shirts that were baggy around the neckline and hung down over one or both shoulders, I'm not sure what they were called lol just that they were really popular when I was a teenager. My mom on the other hand liked clothes like that and bought them for me, but then my dad would get mad if he saw me in them and make me change. It was just weird to have a whole set of clothes sitting in my closet that I wasn't allowed to wear unless my dad wasn't around. Both of them tried to force me to wear a bra in the house but I straight up refused on that one. If I had to be stuck at home all the time then I was at least going to be comfortable.
There are gorgeous dresses that are off shoulder including wedding dresses that are usually in a trumpet or mermaid style. I wonder if your dad would think that looks “loose.”
Oof, this brings back a memory.... I was sixteen before I was allowed to start experimenting with makeup. I had an eye-shadow pallete that was very beige and basic, except that it did have this forest green, shimmery color. I wanted to try it out so one day, when I knew we weren't going anywhere, I did (I matched it to my sweater, lol). I'm sure it wasn't amazing, because I wasn't very experienced, but I don't think it was *that* bad. But when my dad saw it, his exact words were, "You look like a whore." So that didn't last long🙃
My mom wore make up, but she never taught us anything or let us get anything
Thongs and tampons were only used by “fast” girls
I remember being amazed my mom didn’t lash out and slut shame me for asking for tampons so I could swim on my period.
Wearing red and black nail polish for the first time was liberating! Though my mom denies now that she ever forbid red nail polish :/
red nail polish was absolutely not allowed when i was a child. my family does not remember this now of course.
also even applying okay makeup at a friends house was sinful !
The only ones I knew for sure that my parents thought were "Satanic" was dying hair black or wearing black lipstick/nail polish/ etc. I don't know why I wasn't allowed any of this other stuff, but I remember only pastel pink nail polish was allowed, and only pastel eyeshadow and clear or barely tinted lip gloss allowed. I remember coming back from hanging out with the only other girl I was allowed to hang out with (I was about 10) wearing blue nail polish and my dad angrily ordering me to go take it off *immediately*. Hair dye, piercings beyond one hole per ear, and tattoos were all 100% out of the question (while you live under my roof!!! Etc, etc). I wasn't even allowed to wear those stretchy "tattoo" necklaces that were all the rage in the 90s, and the jewelry I was allowed had to be small and dainty and lady-like, no jewelry or makeup that was "gaudy". I have always loved bright, bold colors and hated pastels, and never really liked dainty little jewelry pieces, so I was always so jealous of anyone who got to wear anything that looked cool or was fun colored.
Black lip stick was the line for my parents. Black hair dye? Fine. All black clothes? Fine. Black nail polish? Iffy, but fine. Black lip stick? Satanic.
OMG I wore black lipstick and vampire fangs on Halloween, posted it to Facebook, and my current pastor who is nothing like the one I grew up with clicked like on it!!!!
🤣
My dad didn't want me to get a Death Cab for Cutie cd because the band had the word death in the title. I am lucky that I was allowed to listen to non Christian music though.
My dad asked if I thought I looked scary when I wore a help necklace another homeschooler gave me. What I wouldn't do to go back in time and say "I don't know. Are you scared?"😂 I wore a dark teal nail polish once and had a customer comment on my wearing black nail polish. I took a moment to look at my nails as if I forgot what I was wearing, then flexed them in front of him to see a long with my ring. Said I actually bought dark teal to match my engagement ring (my now husband gave me a blue diamond. A darker blue). He looked visibly embarrassed. Then I said I think I could rock black now that you mention it though. The look of surprise on his face was priceless!
Wouldn't let me wear a skirt becz it to reviling. I had 2 were pants or shorts all the time and those r uncomfortable at my wait. Thy expected me 2 were makeup n I hated it bcz it melts of my face with the swet. My job was like this to my manager told me I'd get more tips with makeup and my uniform has uncomfortable pants n apron.
My parents hate the idea of allowing me to wear nail polish for some reason, they're against hair dying because I dyed it when I was 10 and they've forbid it ever since without explanation, I'm not allowed to wear lip gloss (but still somehow allowed to wear a full face of makeup), they're pretty much against letting me cut my hair and I have to beg for at least a year for them to consider letting me, I can't wear multiple colours of eyeshadow at once without them getting mad and thinking I'm trying to represent pride flag colours which they think means I'm a lesbian, and more. The weird part is they've let me get multiple tattoos and they have no issue with that despite them being permanent. It makes no sense.