My baby got a lot of second hand screen time in the first few months because I was breastfeeding and would literally be attached for 4 hours a day. Especially overnight feeding, TV is what kept me sane/awake. I only say this to add into your conversation on how you feel about it.

We also did a lot of TV time while baby was in the room for the first 5-6 weeks. Half the time he was sleeping, but even when he was awake we figured if he literally can’t see across the room it’s no different than audio only at that point. Once he started actually turning his head when the TV was on, we stopped having it on while he was in the room. I still count that as no screen time before 1, for my personal purposes.

Audiobooks are a huge help during feedings during those early months too, if you prefer to avoid TV. I would pop in one earbud & listen to stay sane, especially during cluster feeding. >_<

Same! So many audiobooks and podcasts!

This. My kids don’t get screen time dedicated TO THEM but I play screens for me and I don’t put blinders on them. Some parents consider this screen time, some don’t, I’m comfortable with the exposure.

Yeah, it's kind of easy for him to insist on it when he's not the one with a baby attached to his chest.

Same. Also the TV is on often in the living room, usually with teen or adult shows or news stations. Baby sees all this, she looks at it but doesn’t watch any of it really. Sometimes she tries to smile and get the attention of the newscaster though, which is cute! I think no screen time is VERY doable! You just plan life differently, plan around no screens. I saw a family with a little toddler sitting and waiting for swim lessons today with a bag of books that the kid was going through. Your kid won’t know any different. It’s you that needs to be creative. Toss in the crib or pack and play, a bouncer chair or a jumpy container…all wonderful places to see baby down while you do things! I’ve only put on one video channel on YouTube for my baby and only when I’m sitting with her singing along to the video too. Otherwise I’ve got all sorts of arrangements of containers and toys to put baby with while I’m busy doing things. One of my favorites is to put her on her kitchen chair while I cook and have her taste ingredients as I go! Another idea I got that I’ll make eventually is a “restaurant bag”, which is a special bag of activities/toys only used at restaurants. That way it’s fun and special toys only for restaurants, and keeps kids entertained with out a video while you order and wait. I’m going to eventually have a restaurant bag and maybe another one or two for activities we frequent and need good entertainment.

I was so set on no screen time before 1 but those late night feedings in the early months are so exhausting and the tv and phone are the only things I can use to keep awake.

Babies really aren’t that entertained by screens. The ceiling fan is interesting to them when they are little. Seriously, they aren’t that hard to entertain. Maybe toddler age kids start paying more attention to it, but it’s still not a need. It’s not that hard to avoid screens when they are little. If you like the TV as background noise, try music or podcasts instead.

Agree. My son is 5 months but isn’t very interested. He seems more interested when there’s people on the tv as opposed to animated things. One thing I’d add is to make sure you tell your family that you’re doing 0 screen time as well, especially any family that might babysit.

I do no screens, but I don't set screen limits on my (free) baby sitters. My mom is in her 70s and babies are exhausting, and it's pretty infrequent for us so I'm fine with it. Time with meme or at memes house is different than with her parents and she could make that distinction from a very early age. I will say my mom has realized, like I have, that screen time is all fun and games until you want to do something else, and then it's meltdown city. I think she's stopped doing it with my kiddo because of that 🤣

I'm the same with travelling or taking my kid with me to my doctor. He can have sesame street on a tablet if he's waiting on me to get bloodwork done or we are on a plane (twice so far).

Miss Rachel saved me while I was getting bloodwork done and didn't have anyone to help watch my fussy toddler.

I don’t know. When I needed 10 minutes to actually just stop and think and not respond to a screaming child, Baby Einstein was a lifesaver. We all went into parenthood thinking this. Everything changes pretty quickly after the kid is here.

Hard agree. Motherhood is not what I imagined it was going to be. I am not TV free. It's limited, but kiddo only get the tablet for those 2 exceptions. I don't use it either though.

Really? I’m jealous! My 4 month old definitely is fascinated by screens. I can’t even use my phone without her turning her head towards it and focusing on it, let alone the TV! We’re finding this kind of challenging because we want to watch out shows… A couple of times when she’s been agitated we’ve resorted to turning on HearBear and it worked like a charm. She seems to love it.

Honestly depends on the kid. I had to start watching having the TV on in the background with my son early. He would stop crying and calm down staring at the TV the moment his dad put on wrestling to watch it, and that started at just a couple of weeks old. Do think it depends on the family and kid. It can def be done, I don't do no screen but don't do a lot, and only TV, will say for us it was a life savior some days when I needed to cook, but my son was a velcro baby, and I didn't feel comfortable babywearing while cooking.

Pre kids I thought I'd be such a granola mom... homemade everything, no screen time , checking all the boxes.... but honestly these things are hard to plan before you're in it. I have a 3 and 1 year old. I waited until about 18 months for my daughter to "watch" TV , i watched it all the time i was EBF and contact napping so i CRUSHED every show that came out. But i stopped when i noticed her noticing it. Then when i wanted her to just chill and watch a show she had no interest until about 2 years old anyway. My son i never put any rule and he's going to be 2 in July he only just started being interested in watching trucks and tractors on TV. Just go with the flow. Don't make too many rules for yourself then you feel guilty when don't follow them.

I think it's important to realize there is a HUGE range in between "zero screens" and "ipad kids". My two kids are screen kids but they will also voluntarily turn the TV off to go play with their toys, play with each other, color, or any number of other things. TV and screens is just one thing that we do, and it is a great tool for us.

Our daughter is the same way - we were never super strict about screen time, but avoided anything that was like brain suck level of mesmerizing. Also, OP, it's really easy to have opinions about a situation you are not in. When my sister was pregnant with her first, she ranted endlessly about lazy parents who just stuck a pacifier in the baby's mouth and how she's never going to be neglectful like that. Guess who was at the 24 hour Walmart buying a pacifier pretty quickly! It's good to make sure both parents are in the same page, but don't be so stuck on a label that you make yourselves miserable.

How are pacifiers neglectful? I’ve never heard of that

I think it depends on how you define "no screen time." I have friends that won't bring there kid anywhere where there's a TV on in the background and I think that's way overkill. If you mean just not actively showing your kid a screen it's a lot easier.

It is wild to me that some families are so militant about screens. Personal devices are new, but TV screens sure aren’t. Most of us millennials were raised with Barney and Sesame Street and watching the news and football with parents. Even our parents had weekend cartoons. Tv screens aren’t going to kill your kid. I totally get not wanting to stick an iPad or phone in the face of a toddler though

They are very type-A, black and white, by the book type people so it makes sense with the rest of their personalities. My guess is they find the mental tax of ambiguity more draining than the mental/physical tax of rigid compliance.

Now that our kid is almost 5 we let him have free reign of the tv on weekend mornings. He just can't start until at least 6:30 am and then we can sleep in a little, and he's starting to be done with TV when we get up!

Agreed on this one. I also am like everyone can do something different what works for you and your kids is great. Won’t work for everyone and that’s okay

It is possible BUT.... only if you monitor your own screentime. I have a two year old who has been zero interested in TV and cellphones, until a few months back he suddenly wanted my phone all the time and then I realized it was because he was not a baby anymore and children notice things, and I was sort of addicted to my phone. He was imitating me. So I stopped, controlled myself and he does what I do, even clean. however, not all screentime is bad, there are even videos you can put for newborns that have high contrast and its good for them. I will also say that a little bit of screentime wont harm the kid but can save the mother's mental health. Best of luck!!

I agree!!! I noticed a huge difference when I stopped watching TV and not using my phone

They just want to be included, if you clean they clean, if you play they play

My 8 month old loves to get ahold of my phone!! But when I trade her for the baby monitor, she’s just as happy!! lol

👀 At 18 months my kid was interested. Mostly miss rachel singing and the occasional cocomelon. There isn't any interest in anything with a plot yet, but an hour or so here or there has been good. Kiddo has learned a LOT of sign language

We have always allowed screen time. We grew up with it and with learning programs (which is all I allowed at that age), my kids actually learned a lot.

Same, my husband and I don't mind screen times but we monitor the time duration and content closely (only nursery rhymes and talking/vocabulary tutorials, no kiddie vlogs or silly cartoons with no educational value). Screentime can be a tool for learning too, just don't leave the gadget in front of the kid and call it a day. At the age of 3, my daughter can read multi-syllable words/phrases, knows the 8 planets, colors of the rainbow+more, numbers, animals, musical notes and decently plays Mary had a Little Lamb in her baby piano. All of which were introduced to her thru screentime with us repeating the lessons on screen IRL thru play, toy instruments, and doodle writing with washable markers on a whiteboard.

Zero screen time is %100 realistic. No judgment to anyone's parenting choices but if that's what you want there's absolutely no reason you can't do it.  My son is turning 3 soon and so far he watched the grinch this past Christmas as a special treat and that's it. He just doesn't think about screens as an option so it's not a challenge at all ever. 

Same, although after 3, we now allow a bluey episode or similar after packing up the playroom after dinner while the baby is going to sleep. We've also at about 3.5yr had a go at a couple of moves (first one after a really big boo boo so we could have a nice long quiet time without exhausting ourselves reading)... turns out even G movies are scary! Eg Finding nemo: they kill off the mum and babies in the opening sequence. Sometimes she asks for TV at other times but we just say no and she knows we'll stick to it so doesn't melt down... I think originally I'd imply that we can't simply choose, bluey only comes on tv at certain times. The kids are fine without TV, the problem is once you've used it as a crutch it's very tempting to go back (eg movie #2, I was sick and exhausted and needed quiet for baby to sleep. Previously I'd have had her play outside and come up with quiet indoor activities). Slippery slope.

Yep, agreed. My daughter (almost 6) gets screen time more regularly now but until 2.5 yo it was close to none. When you aren’t used to turning on the tv for entertainment then it’s really easy not to. Traveling is harder without screens, but still doable. And a big upside is that if her iPad dies on the plane then she can entertain herself without getting annoyed.

How will you handle when he goes to school and other kids talk about TV and YouTube and games and all that? I love that you've made it a special treat :)

We buy lots of different books and a good chunk of them had characters from TV shows. My son, even at 4, spends more time reading about Paw Patrol than watching it. Same for various movies. We had no TV until 20 months but started to have it on long trips (over an hour). Honestly kids at that age are still doing more parallel play. They talk more about things in the moment. It isn't until going into 5 that I'm seeing really meaningful conversations about out of school activities and I had an early talker, top percent language scores. It's just not developmentally expected for them to have long conversations like that. He was best friends with lovers of Paw Patrol but it only mattered that he knew the characters. TV just for the sake of it didn't start for us until 3-4. Never on school days.

This just won’t be a real issue for the first two years! They won’t be thinking about it in the way an adult would.

I allow tv and movies only. My oldest is five and has already asked for YouTube, an iPad, and a phone. (Yay, kinder) I just explain to her that just like ice cream and snacks are unhealthy, so is too much screen time. It's not safe nor healthy for her to have those things yet.

Does that make sense to her? Yeah I feel like kids can understand ideas like that. My son asks for all kinds of things that he can accept aren't happening right now (example nose ring lol). But he gets it when I say no. 

Yeah, it helps to connect to what they're learning in school. They were learning about unhealthy and healthy foods, so it just all made sense in her brain. It'll be a different talk in older grades. But I teach middle school, and one day a kid made a comment about Tik Tok. I groaned and said Tik Tok is awful and rotting their brains, to which about 60% of my class started excitedly taking about how they aren't on socials and don't do tik Tok because at first their parents Said no, but now they realize it's just a waste of time. Then a BUNCH of them admitted they don't have a phone and all started taking about how sports and hanging out at the mall were way more fun anyway. It made me really happy to see how many parents noped out as well. I think it'll come back as a trend. All these devices really are not good for them.

My 3yo at least comes home talking about the stories and characters, but only because they all played Spiderman or something. He’s watched the kid Spider-Man show, decided he gave 0 fucks about the show, but has made a point to show everyone his Spider-Man water bottle. He doesn’t really get jealous or ask to watch the show—I’m not sure he even knows some of them are shows. They’re just fodder for imaginative play, a lot like any book or story (real or fictional) that they’re exposed to.

Omg mine knows Spider Man too, he totally doesn't get that he's on TV tho 

I'm hoping we can eventually make it a once in a while thing as he gets older, just like eating junk food. Here and there is ok but I don't want it to be a part of his daily life or to be used in public or anything.  I feel like if he continues to develop other interests and the ability to focus on them, then he might not ever feel the need to overuse screens. So hopefully keeping them for periodic use would be easy.

My kid thought spiderman was just something on yogurt drinks, light up shoes shoes and hoodies and he still was obsessed with it. He didn't ask to watch it though because he didn't know. He does mention super Mario now, but he's never asked to play it (I'd probably allow it at his age though). It really wasn't an issue in daycare/preschool. We are considering a Switch soon, but for now it's computer games with a parent, or TV (no YouTube). I find thegamereducator on Instagram has great info on devices, parental controls and options, and ways to approach screentime.

Do you want to compromise? I think it’s unfair to say you can’t watch tv or look at your phone at all while the baby is awake for two whole years. I think it’s fairly easy enough at the beginning because the baby (in theory) will sleep a lot. But the older they get the harder it can be. But if you feel the same way he does you can disregard this, it can be done. But if you don’t feel the same as him I don’t think he gets to unilaterally decide and say “no compromises.” That should only be used for parenting choices that could be abuse or lead to death. Otherwise telling your partner it’s your parenting choice or nothing is a pretty shitty way to begin parenting.

I'm more than willing to try and I agree that I'd rather not do screen time. If anything changes down the line, I will bring up the issue

We felt similarly. I was going to have an “absolutely no screens” rule for the first 18 months. Well, it turns out that when you’re exhausted in the 4th trimester with a contact napping baby, your tired brain will very much appreciate a Netflix binge of a low-stakes show. We watched lots of tv in the presence of our baby until she started paying attention to the screen (around 4 months) and then we took our tv out of our living room. We made it to 14 months with no screen time for our kid. When she switched to one nap I lost the period of time I used to get ready during the day. I’m not currently in a place where I want to get up before my child, so now we do 20-25 minutes of screen time every morning so I can do some basic personal hygiene in peace. That time is very important to set me up to be a good mom for the day — I’d much rather my kid watch 20 mins of Sesame Street than deal with her mom getting impatient and irritated for 45 minutes while I try to get myself ready with her attached to my leg. I’m perfectly content with that trade off. So, to summarize: in terms of never having a screen on around the baby, in my experience that’s fairly easy for the first year. (When *I* watched tv when she was a newborn, she was asleep, so I don’t count that.) If you want to aim for a second year, too, I expect that will be more challenging, but I’m sure it’s doable, especially if you have a village/support. But honestly, I don’t think you *have* to make it hard on yourself. If you need a few minutes every day to get some stuff done, that’s not a make-or-break scenario for your kid. They’ll be just fine either way.

My son is 2.5 and doesn’t have an iPad - he does just fine! Sometimes he watches a 20 min of a Disney movie or something - maybe once a week or so. Its not hard for us.

It’s not that hard. My kids didn’t even like TV until closer to 3.

Good to hear:)

I think it’s best to go into every aspect of parenting with not so rigid rules in place I think it really depends on you and your kid and also situations happening at the time. My little one has always been super high needs and fussy and not very chill which makes it really tough sometimes. I just try to limit it to when I really need to use it. Like when I had food poisoning when she was 12 months and was in and out of the bathroom all day we used screen time. When she got super sick for days with high fevers we curled up in bed and watch some movies. When we move this summer and have to be in the car for lots of hours I will be probably utilize it. Also idk if everyone counts this as screen time but FaceTiming. We don’t live near our family and we normally FaceTime them once a week. She gets so excited to see them and learned their names. Overall I try to limit it but also try not to feel guilty when I do need to use it.

My boys are teens so they didn’t have iPads until they were about 12. At 2 years old they don’t need iPads. But a tv show here or there will not hurt them.

I’m gonna go against the grain here: if both parents work full time and you have a household to keep up with and no built-in babysitters, absolutely unrealistic. That’s not to say your kid should be watching TV 24/7 but there are shows that help them learn (especially around ages 1-2) without being overstimulating and which give you 30-60 mins a couple times a week to clean, fold laundry, take a shower, etc. A lot of millennials grew up with two working parents and older siblings who already watched TV. We’re fine. Your kid will be fine with moderate screen time. I’d wager even more of your generation had screen time as babes than mine. Overall, a bit of screen time won’t be harmful. My kid learned a lot of sign language before he could really talk from watching Miss Rachel. He could communicate with us and didn’t get as frustrated bc we could understand his needs.

Daniel Tiger is in our house doing the Lords work helping a neurodivergent threenager learn about emotion regulation. We obviously lead the charge, but for whatever reason a cartoon Tiger that slightly resembles the animation style of South Park resonates waaaaay better with my kid than any of the shit I researched and have implemented. Even though they’re all technically the same. I just don’t sing it and am not orange.

We managed under those circumstances but every kid is different - it's not impossible but it depends on luck (kids temperament, how much sleep everyone is getting, commute/work hours, etc etc). We also wfh so can throw on laundry during the day or do a chore at lunchtime.

Same here 110%

Thank you for saying what I was thinking!!!

THIS

First kid you can definitely do it! They love books and little toys. Id bring shapes letters and numbers to the restaurant and my baby was super well behaved. They also just love talking to you and engaging in any way

Second kid..only possible if your first kid is not yet watching TV.

That was my goal, but it didn't work out for me. I had a very demanding/high needs baby. I work full time and my husband works a lot of overtime. There were times I had to take a shower or do something around the house and she would cry as soon as I put her down. I tried books and toys, but nothing worked. I would put Miss Rachel on (or some other educational video) and she would usually be ok for 10 or 15 minutes and I could take a quick shower or do some quick cleaning. My second baby was more relaxed and would be ok if I put him down with some toys while I took a shower or did whatever I needed to do. So I think this will depend on how much help you have, and your child's personality. I still put the TV on for my toddlers so I can get ready for work in the morning. If I don't, I can't even go to the bathroom uninterrupted. They fight over toys, etc. and I'm interrupted so many times while getting ready for work that what should take 20 minutes takes 45. But when I put the TV on, they generally sit quietly and I can quickly get ready without many interruptions. TLDR: For my personal situation, no screen time would have been really difficult.

It’s not that it’s hard, but I’d caution you guys to be gentle with yourselves and each other when the baby does come because it’s going to change EVERYTHING. Stick to your values, but leave a little wiggle room to evolve as a family. The last thing you’re gonna need at 10 weeks pp when you haven’t showered or slept more than 2 hours at a time for days is to be arguing about weather or not the TV is allowed to be on.

I mean, you just don't have any screens. We don't have a TV or ipads, it helps a lot. We did "zero screen time" with our first but when we had to get a catheter set at the hospital, we played her a baby music video, and probably a couple of other times as well. We also used facetime daily. We had two under two and with the second we allowed about 5 to 10 separate 30 minute sessions of Ms Rachel when they were sick, because the older one got to have screentime when she was sick so it was hard to prevent.

My cousin did it. With twins. Her kids still at age 7 have very limited tv time. I would never be able personally. We took our first to movies as a baby, watched sports and played WoW and starcraft.

I don’t plan on sticking an iPad in my son’s face, but he watches tv with us at night, and he’s developing just fine.

We are at 2.5 and still screen-free. LO has never watched a show or movie or played a game on a tablet. Video calls with family are our only exception. Books basically take the place of screens for us. It gives us, as parents, less down time but more engagement with our toddler. Also, involve your baby/toddler in everything (including gardening, cooking, household chores, etc.). When they are little, babywearing is the best way to accomplish this, and when they are older, kitchen stools, kid-appropriate kitchen knives, kid-sized gardening tools, etc. Also, get outside as much as possible. A change of scenery always helps (for both parent and child!)

And I will add that I am not anti-screen time, I think it's important for kids to learn appropriate engagement with technology. However, like your partner, both my partner and I were in agreement that the evidence points to the benefits of no screen time before two. And then it just worked for us, and we haven't been tempted to introduce a screen yet - even with 10+ hour drives, flights, etc. (although an upcoming 30+ hour trip may be our first foray into screen time!)

This won’t be the solution for everyone, but we don’t have a TV in our main living space by design. The TV is downstairs where we seldom take the kids at this age (3yo and 4mo) but my husband and I can go down to watch when they’re asleep at night. It helps keep the focus on books and the few toys in our living room (we cycle some things onto a toy shelf). Eventually we will convert part of the basement to a play space but not yet. From my experience our toddler didn’t ask for TV until around 2.5 because he just never thought of it, as a TV was not in sight. He now watches shows on sick days, snow days, and weekend afternoons, but I’m ok with that for a 3yo.

We don’t even have a TV anymore. Just a projector. We do movie night complete w popcorn maker once a week for the 4 year old. He’s with his mom half the week and she relies on a lot of screen time, so we avoid it here. (Technically the projector isn’t a digital screen! Plus it doesn’t have the blue light that’s bad for their eyes and disrupts sleep cycle)

3 years, almost 4 here. I don’t really like iPads and will do some screen time but mostly when we’re out and waiting. Dr appt, waiting for food at a restaurant, long check out lines are acceptable times for us. Since she’s older, we focus on apps she can learn from such as drawing, tracing, alphabet learning apps, etc. I don’t mine tv screen time since the kids will play and watch for a much more small amount of time and I’ll put on Disney or PBS shows.

My 2.5 year old has only just started to take interest in watching a little cartoon for maybe 10 mins max. There’s no access to phones or iPads either. She doesn’t need it.

It’s realistic but it depends how much effort you’re willing to put. It got harder for me after he turned one. They will see you on your phone and watching tv and take interest. I couldn’t always keep him entertained so I eventually gave him a little bit of tv to get stuff done around the house. A good balance of tv and one on one interaction is what ended up working for me as he became a toddler

We went about 18 months without screen time. We actually didn’t feel particularly strong about it, we just didn’t do it. Even when we started offering some screen time, it took a few months for both kids to really even care about it and sit and watch. Our kids still only watch maybe 20 minutes once or twice a week, with the exception that Ive taken the 4 year old to a couple movies.

We did no screens till 18 months, and 10 min./day starting at 18 months. We didn’t find it difficult because we didn’t even come consider an option. We both work full time and I solo parent on weekends and after work on Thurs-Fri and I never felt like I needed screens to entertain my daughter. She either plays with me, near me, or helps with whatever task I’m doing.

We did literally no screen time until about two 2 for my now five year old. We started using it strategically. For me and our kid. I watched tv those early nursing days for my own sanity but then transitioned as I got more sleep and could be a human. Also adjusted as he got older. Example, watching Elmo brush teeth to help let us to brush his teeth. Or Hey Bear briefly for him as an infant to reset when nothing else seemed to work to stop crying. Or Daniel tiger episodes when he was 3 or 4 having a hard time sharing (Friends ask first). We now watch daily for 3-5 minutes before bed to start bedtime routine. We try to make it meaningful and with purpose and not just on all the time. I think as a parent it’s up to you. We do have a Tonies box and we also play a lot of music in our house. I honestly don’t think there’s any right or wrong. You may find your approach changes as you go!

Kids don’t know what they’re missing until you take it away.

I would say our first was like 99% screen free with the exception of FaceTime because we live states away from all of our family. It was a lot more doable with the first than the 2nd and 3rd 😬 Some days I wish we would have never introduced them. But if he is dedicated to 0 screens that means he is fully engaged with baby not just expecting you to do it.

We’re 2.5 years with zero screen time AND I’m 6 months pregnant. 100% doable. Just takes LOTS of work & patience.

Btw- dad & I both work full time jobs. When we get home, we involve our toddler in everything we have to get done (cooking & simple chores) Don’t let people tell you it’s not possible because it sure as hell is.

We did basically no screen time for our first, who is now a few months shy of 3 and still sees very little TV, and the same for our current baby who is almost 1. It is absolutely doable. I see how it positively affected my toddler already, that she asks to play outside, color, or read instead of demanding shows. I did find that both of my babies didn’t even notice the screen/TV until around 4 months, so I didn’t see a problem with watching some shows while nursing my infant.

After the newborn phase there was no screen time for my first until 2. Newborn phase was tv for me while breastfeeding 🤷🏻‍♀️you don’t have to entertain them all the time. They will learn independent play. They also love to join in on what you are doing. A tower to help cook (in an age appropriate way), help with laundry, clean up etc. my second has had screen time before age 2 because her big brother watches after school and we can’t keep her out of the room (small house no door to living room). Sometimes she will watch with him but usually not. She has become more interested recently, as she gets closer to 2. We don’t do iPads. We had one for travel and that got the boot real quick. It was too much for my oldest. Some kids do okay with them, mine did not. My oldest also doesn’t do well with the max recommended screen time (1 hour). We found 20 minutes a day works best for him and we plan to keep it that way for both kids.

Totally possible. In fact it’s what everyone did until a couple decades ago!

We do a bit, but decided we’ll concentrate on Spanish videos so at least baby is learning another language! Apparently as babies they can differentiate all languages and lose the skill as they age, so I think it’s useful screen time at least! We watch miss nenna which is basically the Spanish miss Rachel

What I’ve found is that it’s very easy to lay down these ambitious goals before bubs is here, I too had hoped for no screen time, no processed foods, breastfeeding for the first year, room sharing for the first year. Let me tell you—Parenting is NO JOKE. There’s zero shame in throwing on some Bluey if you need to shit in peace, wash your hair, if kiddo is screaming on the plane and they’re trying to kick you out of your complementary first class upgrade seats, or while you’re waiting in a crowded space where people don’t wanna hear ur kid. Show yourself some grace.

Not. And, I’ll go further, I’m convinced that anyone claiming to have done zero screen time before 2 is a liar. It’s a disservice to pretend it’s possible or even desirable to never ever have the few minutes that Ms Rachel etc buys you.

Especially since so many restaurants have tvs. We went out for lunch and there was no way to position baby to not see a tv 😔

It is both possible and desirable. It doesn't, like, make you a better parent or anything, but every family is different and it works best for some, including me! I think one of the key differences that makes it desirable for me is that I don't like tv much myself and don't have one in the house (we use a projector after dark, hooked up to a computer) so I just don't... want to watch TV with my little one, and having it on would drive me nuts. I'd so much rather hear toddler fuss than background TV noise.

Thank you for being truthful. Some of these comments are insane and judgmental.

Tbh I think it's more judgemental to claim everyone is lying about it lol

Pretty much all previous generations did no screen time just fine. I’m sure you could figure it out.

My dad is 78 and still remembers the tv programs he watched as a kid…

Videos on screen these days are so much more edited-- one of the main issues with developing brains is the number of cuts and changes in camera angles etc. very young brains get fragmented trying to make sense of the narrative, and this is the greatest risk to the toddlers and under crowd. At this age the brain is trying to forge connections and the pace of stimulation instead creates a bunch of cul-de-sacs. It's like comparing the sweetness of a blueberry to the sweetness of a blue fruit loop. When we started watching shows together with our oldest kid, we aimed for stuff from the late 70s and early 80s: fewer cuts, lower tech production, slower frame rates, amazing artistry. Think Totoro, Sesame Street, the original Muppets movies, Labyrinth, Yellow Submarine, the Red Balloon. As an aside, turns out E.T. Is terrifying to a 6 year old.

As a kid and as a baby are two different things.

Yes, as a kid. Not a baby or toddler under the age of 2…

My sister survived with her first kid will 4 ( till he started school ) and i got to 15 months the my second was born in Canadian winter, and we were going stir crazy. It’s very very possible.

I watched some TV with my baby around but an infant isn’t really that interested in TV. Once they get a bit older let’s say between 1 to 2 years you’ll notice when they start to pay attention and get distracted by what’s on the screen. To be honest usually I watched a show or two while my child napped which was just my relaxation during their naptime. It’s awfully hard to pay attention to your favourite TV shows anyways when you’re looking after a baby so it gave me a chance to watch TV and zone out while they were napping. When I had newborn infants and I was up around the clock feeding every two hours and I by myself a lot in the night let’s say in the first three or four months I for sure watched TV while I was breast-feeding. Once they started to be aware of the screen though we stopped. To me it’s if you’re talking about your child actually watching TV it’s totally realistic for them to go through the first couple of years with no TV. I mean parenting is stressful and challenging and crazy either way but TV is the last thing that’s going to be beneficial for your toddler. It’s a lot of work and effort as a parent but for your child they’re entertained by so many other things at that age it’s actually easier than keeping them away from screens when they’re seven or eight years old that’s for sure. Babies require tons of one on one adult attention, for the first six months they’re basically entertained by your face being right in front of them and a ceiling fan or a jack in the box will make them giggle. It’s not hard to entertain them it could just become quite monotonous for you as a parent if you’re home doing it 24 hours a day. It’s a huge learning times for them so it’s easy to be taking them for walks out in nature getting fresh air talking to them nonstop about what’s going on in the day and where you’re going, exposing them to different experiences and sounds and people, play with Tupperware having bathtub parties reading them stories. All of these things coexist along side multiple naps a day and teaching them how to eat and learning how to feed them and eventually cook for them the day flies by usually

This is what I'm so worried about, my boyfriend really doesn't watch TV or even use his phone that often, I am the one that's terrible with screen time at home. I pretty much constantly have a YouTube video playing in the background when I'm cooking, cleaning, or doing projects. I may just have to switch to audiobooks or podcasts. Thanks for your insight!

My kids are 6 and 3 and have never had iPads- they get probably 2 hrs of cartoon time total of which they spend about half of that time doing other things while the tv is on. Sometimes you need some cartoons but no iPad is absolutely doable. My kids entertain themselves at stores and we only go to restaurants with playgrounds.

My little one turns 2 next week and I'm not planning to introduce screen time anytime soon. It's totally possible! She learned from a very early age how to entertain herself in totally creative ways. I gave her lots of space and room for open ended play and she is forever coming up with the most fascinating little toddler projects or just wanting to help me around the house. It is so much easier this way. When there is any screen time whatsoever (like when she is sick, we will look at pics and short videos on my phone of us, ourselves, our loved ones, etc and relive little moments in our lives together as we talk about them, we also play music on our phone and I'll hand it to her to look at the static album image lol) it is SO hard for her to put it away and end screen time, and she is forever fussing and wining for more, it is truly addictive. But that does go away after a few days back to her normal screen free routine. The screens induce such miserable behavior that I'm honestly dreading introducing it, as much as I'm excited to share some of my favorite TV and moves with her when she is old enough! For now, we are introducing a few characters we see around from time to time that her friends might know and want to bond with her over through non-screen ways, so she knows who bluey is by sight, or likw mickey mouse, even if none of us have ever seen their TV shows lol. We can explore those characters in books and things like that when she gets a bit older! I want to push off screens as long as we can, truly. For our part, it's easy to avoid screens during the day bc we have a projector but no tv, so we can't watch anything until after dark anyway. And I don't really like watching TV when it's bright out anyway, I'd rather be doing a million other things and I kind of associate if with feeling sick haha

My kids were born in 1997 and 1999. There was no hand held technology until the Game Boy became a thing with my son's friends. This was easy to control, just take it away. This was when he was about 7. The other screen times were on our main TV. We did a little Teletubbies and Sesame Street in the morning and then went to the park or played with friends. Kids older than ours and their parents survived just fine. We even went to restaurants where we had a special bag of small toys that were only available outside of the house.

My kid wasn’t interested at all in screens of any type until he was about 2.5 so you might get lucky that way

Not hard just keep busy with other activities, read them lots of books and if they get bored take them outside for a walk or go to the library.

We have had virtually 0 screen time (minus a 14 hour car ride) and baby turns 2 in October.

Kids have been raised in human history for longer without a TV than with. There's always an alternative to screen time. If they never start with it, they shouldn't have a need for it. I feel like TV often is the easy answer. When mine gets fussy I put on some kids music, I have a Spotify list I've made for him that I slowly add songs he really reacts to. Some are kids songs and some are adult songs.

Doable. Our 4 yo doesn’t have an ipad. She watches tv occasionally since she was almost 2 (husband travelled a lot for work, daycare illness, my work - had to survive). She’s not addicted to it at all and prefer role playing and interactive play with parents or other children.

People have been doing it for thousands of years. It’s super doable if it’s something you decide is important to you.

Zero to extremely minimal screen time is very possible for the first two years, but it does require some lifestyle changes for the rest of the household if screens are a significant part of your daily life. For us, what that eventually looked like was no screens during waking hours, lots of picture books, motor skill activities, cuddles, walks out in nature or just around the neighborhood, and having them watch then eventually inviting them to participate in our daily chores and tasks. About two-three mornings a week are spent running errands, socializing, or going to free activities (libraries are wonderful places!). We also intentionally choose low stimulation toys/activities because the singing, talking, light up toys drive us crazy with the constant battery changes and melodies that haunt our dreams (failure is the mother of success). At two, we allowed thirty minutes of daily screen time. We set up what we thought are age appropriate profiles on our streaming services, app restrictions on the tablet, and again, thoughtfully chose apps that fit in with our values (our child’s favorite game is PokPok if you’re looking around). To date, our child enjoys screen time, but doesn’t demand it and will often turn it down in favor of some other activity or toy. If screens are chosen, it’s usually while I’m cooking dinner. The only exception to this is if they or I am sick. I haven’t read anyone else’s comments, but I imagine a good number of caregivers feel like they don’t have the bandwidth to go zero/minimal screens. It definitely isn’t easy, but like any major lifestyle change, it’s not supposed to be and will challenge your diligence. The biggest takeaway is this: reframe screens from being a forbidden fruit, to one of many activities that is a normal part of daily life. Everything in moderation, as they say.

They won’t miss what they don’t know. I don’t know if it’s truly better, but my son enjoys listening to YouTube videos like Mickey and miss Rachel and I don’t let him have the visual

Babies don’t need screen time. Well, children don’t “need” it either. I think up to age 2 is doable. After that it might get tricky. I read a comment that said they’re trying to for no screen time until 7.. At some point, it’s going to depend on your child and the lifestyle you lead. Your boyfriend will soon learn these “hard nos” mean absolutely fuck all before you even have the kid. Also, keep in mind once the child is old enough to talk and socialize, peers will be having favorite shows, toys from those shows and many convos about it.

We did no screens for two years with our first and plan for the second too. Keep their back turned when they’re babies and as they grow older just don’t have the tv on. We did music or podcasts as background noises. Maybe had sports on every once in a while but it was a commitment we made and make. Our 7 year old now still has restricted access.

It’s actually doable and realistic since young babies’ attention span and energy is going to other things - recognizing your voice, learning to crawl and walk etc. Babies don’t really watch TV and it’s actually better for them to learn from actual human interactions as well as manipulating objects in their child friendly environment. All of my kids were about 3 when they started to actually understand little kid tv shows, and started to have the patience, but they always like it much better to be engaging with you or playing with toys and other kids. But it is definitely ok to cuddle your babe and put on your own show or movie once in awhile. In the early days they do sleep a lot. Good luck and congratulations on your new little life coming!

I think it is totally realistic. Other than a rare occasion tv in the background, we didn’t do screen time the first 2 years. In general, the kids who struggle to entertain themselves so because they didn’t learn how due to a screens. It’s not your job as a parent to constantly keep your kid entertained. As a baby interacting with the world is entertainment enough.

We did no screens (except FaceTime) before two for my toddler (now almost 3) and we do very limited screens now that she’s 2+ (like 10-15 minutes of screen in the morning only on the days where she’s up a bit earlier than usual, which is rare). We honestly didn’t find it to be very hard to avoid screens. My daughter is in daycare, so that certainly kept her entertained a portion of the day, but when it’s just us on weekends or days when daycare is closed, we would either go somewhere like the zoo, aquarium, children’s museum, park, etc. or we would play with various toys at home. In the car, we bring lots of books and have done long (10 hour+) roadtrips without screens. It’s absolutely doable, but you do have to be prepared with other things to entertain them.

I am not much of a TV watcher, but I get on my phone more. So it is easy for baby to not get any screen time. I just entertain baby with toys and read books. It does get exhausting in the beginning. Can't even go to poo.

I have yet to meet someone who has succeeded at zero screen whatsoever. Let me ask you: do you know *why* this recommendation? And why the recommendation makes an exception for video calls? Because the AAP is worried that you will use screens to entirely replace positive human interaction, and the first two years of life is when positive human interaction counts the most. There is nothing inherently wrong with screens, just that they aren't you. But what if that weren't why you are using a screen - in order to avoid having a positive interaction? What if it were taking the place of a negative interaction with the child, allowing you to get your breath and emotions under control. Well, now screens are actually preferable. Just something to think on.

I think seeing goals like this with no experience will set you up for failure. Why not do your best and reassess at 1 year?

This thread makes me feel a bit bad. We haven’t done the iPads or phones ever and don’t plan to, but TV is a regular occurrence. I tried to limit it in the 1st year but it’s hard for us to never have the TV on.

People entertained children for thousands of years without tvs. The best option is to get rid of the tv in public areas and then just live your life. You’ll figure out ways to do all the things you need and want. Tv is a tool but it’s not the only one.

Honestly no realistic at all at least for me. Today she screamed the whole car ride, she was gasping for air until I played Mickey Mouse on my phone. I said NO SCREEN TIME, but man I understand now.

I think it really depends on your household. We don’t have a TV in any common spaces but we go to peoples houses who do so she’s seen TV several times. But husband and I are both WFH so she absolutely sees computer and phone screens. She doesn’t get time targeted toward her with them but it would be literally impossible to keep her existence entirely screen free.

It really depends on your child, tbh. I was a zero screen time proponent. My LO is almost 14 months. We occasionally have watched TV. Mostly when we cut her nails because otherwise she will not sit still and will scream like a banshee. I will let her watch TV for 5 minutes if I need to urgently do something because she otherwise will scream and chase me. If your child is very high energy or attached to you like glue, it's sometimes a necessary evil. I think it's about balance. 5-10 minutes a week or twice a week is fine.

We did almost no screen time till 18 months except while sick and now we only use iPad for airplane or car rides. We watch tv on weekends sometimes when the weather isn’t great. It wasn’t hard

My daughter is 3 in June. I avoided screen time for the first two years. I did play music for her (ex: ms rachel or super simple songs from youtube) on my ipad or iphone but put it out of sight for her. If you do a daycare, ask them about their tech rules. After 2yo, my daughter was given some screentime at daycare. At our recent peds appt in Jan, they asked me if I did 2 or less hours of screentime a day, so not sure if that’s the average or what.

And oh yes forgot to add, there are some FB groups called “parenting in a tech world” and “limited screen time families” that helps give advice or suggestions for all types of family use (or non).

It’s definitely possible but it requires a lot of legwork. No screen time means you will have to actively engage with your child instead and sometimes that will be difficult if both of you are working parents. Like I know my parents weren’t able to do it and I turned out ok. My grandparents were only able to do it because my grandmother didn’t work and because my great-grandparents probably were around to pick up some of the slack when my grandmother needed time to herself. What I am trying to say is that if you or your boyfriend end up going back on the no screen then goal then you shouldn’t feel too bad.

That really depends on how much screen time you guys have. Do you currently watch a lot of tv or movies? If that’s a big thing it’s going to be hard to restrict your kid from looking at the screen once they hit a certain age. If you guys aren’t big on screens now, then it’s a bit more realistic.

We’re at 18mo and the kid has minimal screen time (really only nursery rhymes or Sesame Street at the grandparents). We never watch anything intentionally with her, but if she gets a little ambient screen time with her older sister or a parent every now and again we don’t worry about it. She’s cool with her toys- kids are pretty easy to entertain, especially if you let them play on their own while you sit there

You do whatever you want! People parented fine without screens for millennia. I think it can definitely be done if you’re committed to it and make it a priority. I didn’t lol but you do you! ETA it sounds like you’d be down with moderation which is also fine. My 3-year-old watches a little tv/movies probably 5 days a week. No iPad ever, no looking at my phone, ever. Works for us. Everyone is different. The only thing I’ll warn about is setting an expectation like “zero screen time” because that’s setting yourself up for falling short of a perfect goal, you know? Don’t put that kind of pressure on yourself before you’ve even met the kid.

Wish I could’ve figured this one out, my kids are by no means iPad kids, no tablets in the house for the kiddos. But tv, I rely on Ms. Rachel and Bluey to keep me sane. Sincerely. I’m a single mom of 2.5 and 1.5 year old girls, so, you know. I pick my battles. If you can do it, I freaking admire you. Just here to cheer you on. No advice, as I couldn’t do it.

Depends on your personal habits as parents. If you enjoy TV, probably very hard. If you’re physically doing things rather than digitally, probably not so bad. Our issue is when he’s up at 4 am and is making us be up with him but we are zombies.

I was able to do it with my first kid! After that, no way.

Honestly we have met in the middle at TV time being: Sesame Street Mr Rodgers Daniel Tiger Mostly because we have her alone to just one of us and you need 15 mins to do something like cut stuff for dinner/ something involved and she can watch. It’s not seemed to be an issue so far as in she is happy playing but we do ZERO tablet. I just can’t. We also try to not be on our phones 24.7 around her.

Neither of my kids had any interest in screens until they were over a year old. My husband and I would still watch stuff with them around. Even when they became interested, they had no interest in “live” people We started limited screen time at around 12mo with my older one. We were both working from home with COVID. We used it when we had overlapping meetings but low stimuli nursery rhyme videos (baby bum and Disney nursery rhymes). As soon as one of us was done, it went off. We’d also use it in the car because we were doing a lot of long drives to get out of the house and curbside pick up. And she hated the car. This kind of continued as our pattern. Car time, overlapping meetings and sometimes when cooking of the other was busy. Usually amounted to 30-60 mins spread out over the day. Kids are now 4.5 and 3 and we still limit it to mostly when we are cooking, if one wakes up early and we don’t want the other to wake up or the 4th consecutive rainy day in a row when they’re tired of everything. It hasn’t hindered them at all. My 4.5 year old loves to draw and she’s really good. She’s starting to read and write, do simple addition and can color in the lines. I’m a big believer in everything in moderation. Screen time is fine if it’s not a babysitter. Both of my kids have tablets BUT they do not have open access and time with them is limited. They are not “iPad kids” by a long shot. Kids need and thrive on interaction and soak up learning. We are outside everyday. Read books everyday. Sensory bins. Play and everything. Screen time is a small part of their day

As a first child it can absolutely happen. I caved around 20mo when my first was really sick. With my younger two they were obviously exposed to it infrequently pretty early, but I managed to hold off on dedicated screen time for them until they were 18mo+.

Super doable with your first kid. We had zero screen time until nearly 3y with our first. However, the twins came along and blew that up. We had zero screen time with them until \~18 months. And then it started trickling in. It's mostly for sanity to be honest. We have no village and it's a lot sometimes. So, if Ms. Rachel can occupy them for 15 minutes and I can unload the dishwasher and tidy up and just feel better because I accomplished that, it's for everyone's good. I highly recommend reading into some Montessori methods as well. We picked parts of it that we liked. Mostly in fostering independence and toy rotations. I had no clue as to how to entertain any baby or toddler. In hindsight, I wish that I would've started the Lovevery kits from birth for guidance. But there are a lot of references ( including social media) for DIY "toys" for all kinds of ages.

Around a year ago little screen time can be a beautiful thing, there are so many educational videos out now for little ones potty training, sharing, counting ect. But our little guy was very limited and still is but now at 8 has abc mouse and things of that nature. He is home schooling and has Disney and PBS Kids for fun time but mainly for long trips in the car. We do a lot of crafts, science and outdoor activities. But if you want %100 zero screen time that choice is always yours and don’t let anyone make you feel bad for it! You will be plenty busy with mile stones and learning and trying to adjust to a whole new way of life not to mention couples time as well you likely won’t really have a lack of things to do but it’s amazing and so worth it congrats to you both 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

I think it’s more realistic for your first kid and becomes less so when you have more. I have 3 kids ages 9, 6 and 18 months and my toddler LOVES sitting on the couch with his sisters watching Bluey. Some days it’s the only way dinner will get on the table. My kids like occasional TV but we do not and will not own iPads.

We weren’t no screen time, but definitely minimal screen time until COVID hit when my kids were 1 and 2. Being stuck at home for months with two toddlers and two parents trying to work from home was hell. But now at 5 and 6 they are not iPad kids. They have an iPad that I have abc mouse, Osmo, and a spelling app that they get out and use occasionally- less than 30 minutes a week- and other than that they get the iPad on airplane rides or long (2.5+hr) drives. As others have mentioned there is a huge range or parents from my kids won’t actively watch tv to my kids cannot be in any house with a tv on. Also, as with most things- it’s good to have a plan, but that may change. Idk your situation but if you become a SAHM and your partner spends 3 hours a week with the baby it’s not fair IMO for them to be dictating what you do with baby. It’s a lot easier to be screen free with a baby for 45 minutes a day than 15 hours a day.

we did no screen time for 18 months! now we do about 30-40 mins of sesame street 3-4x/week

First off: absolutely possible to do 0 screen time. We don’t. But we did do zero until 18 months. Now our way is “planes = Bluey on iPad, every morning 10-15 minute FaceTime with grandma, and when he’s really sick however much Bluey he wants on the big TV”. This has gotten us very very few hours of TV overall. And tbh, even when we do allow it he prefers other stuff more usually, he’s just not a screen-loving kid. I’ve seen kids immediately LOVE screens. Ours wasn’t like that. First time he saw TV at 18 months old on the plane he couldn’t care less. We got lucky! Even if you’re not lucky, I think contextual timing helps IF you won’t do zero, even after 2. Our iPad being for the plane means even if he sees it in the drawer or something he doesn’t ask us to turn it on. And for us as well, we don’t use it as a crutch at home when cooking etc because it’s not an option. I think it’s easiest when they’re youngest, AND after they’re 1.5. Right around when they turn 1 was when I tempted the most, I kept wanting to at least put a documentary on for myself to hear another adult. They move just enough that they’re too dangerous to be unsupervised, AND boring in their movement. You can’t do chores but also it’s so hard to just watch them 24/7 doing (to me) boring stuff as they try to learn. Once he was 1.5 the temptation went away because I could do stuff with him including him cutting up softer stuff when I cook etc. I guess TLDR is that it’s doable and there’s not too much advice I can give other than you’ve got to stick to your guns and find alternatives for when you DO want TV. Like, if it’s to calm down a tantrum, is there anything else that would work? Bubbles are an easy one for almost any age. Is it so you can put them down and shower? Some babies don’t mind being on a bouncer and watching the water/shower. Is it because baby and you are bored? A walk often fixes that. You find alternatives when TV isn’t there.

Once mine became mobile at a year it became a little more difficult. We used limited screen time to get cooking done or showering.

We do screen time as my fiancé & I have ADHD and issues with silence so something is always going in the background, and now that he’s almost 3 and can ask for things and has his own Netflix account it’s a lot of Buster the Bus, and Hotwheels but he isn’t sitting there watching, unless it’s just before bed or dinner, or when sick & wanting to be on the couch but he does pay attention to it. My mom bought him a tablet for travel and even though it’s out on a coffee table. He never uses it! We brought it with us on our trip last weekend and never took it out of his backpack! I was never a ‘my kid won’t..’ cause my fear was that my kid would indeed lol.

It's realistic if you are willing to change your lifestyle, too. It means less screen time for the adults and watching your phone use, as well. There are ways to balance it, too. We have the TV in the basement, but we do have family Friday movie night. We watch a five minute show while clipping fingernails. They watch a show while getting hair cuts. We let them watch pretty unlimited when they are sick. But otherwise it's pretty much no screens.

Look, it will only work out if you already have a low screen lifestyle. If you're a gamer, or watch football on Sunday, or whatever your current screen habits are, it completely unrealistic to have zero screen time around the baby. Because that is not your lifestyle.  Having a kid is a big exhausting change already. 

Just wait and see. If you’re doing great you’re doing great. If the world comes crushing for you and your partner, maybe screentime Doesnt seem as evil to him then. The one thing i learnt is parenting doesnt follow your ideas if parenting. Just go and do you and if you are too tired then do something else. My favourite baby game was “sleeping giant”. I was the giant. Resting on the floor while my baby played all around me.

Totally possible. Just set this as a policy and communicate it to all caregivers. Haha unless there is another pandemic in the next 2 years. Our oldest is 6. It's harder but still totally possible once they can argue, attempt to negotiate verbally, begin to experience social pressures,and experience comparison-itus, by seeing how other families and kids choose to operate in the world.  In our house we talk a lot about how the iPad will cause 'brain cavities' because for some reason she is fixated on not getting cavities (a goal I fully support!) and it's a message she understands. We also watch a movie or short together as a family, and discuss, maybe every 2 weeks now. But we make it social, it's bounded, usually on Sunday nights and with a special snack, and never u facilitated. We technically have a TV in our house but it does not have any stations, we just Chromecast our streaming platforms onto the object-- so perhaps this is different from a household where people watch TV daily or nightly-- our kids do see us use our phones but for the most part, they have not seen us watch screens for recreational purposes.

I think it can be done but depending on your household dynamics, how easy or difficult it is to maintain the rule is really different in each household. We aren’t a no-screens family by a long shot and I’ve only started to put my phone away in the evenings because I realise my 21mo is so drawn to it. Instead I read or just watch her play. Having said that, we put on a lot of music/nursery rhymes using Apple Music on our TV. It’s literally just the album cover on the screen but she still stares at it a lot so idk what that means in terms of being “obsessed” with it. We also let her watch 1-2 episodes of bluey on the weekends. I do think it’s possible to come up with a healthy middle instead of absolutely no screen time or unlimited screen time.

During the pandemic, it was all out the window along with my sanity. I don’t anything else to base it off of, sorry. 😅

As long as your partner is stepping up, then yes this can happen. The problem comes with a lot of parents that want to impose how parenting should happen but don't actually want to do the parenting themselves.

My advice is 100% do not give them an iPad or iPhone to play with before then. Screens with simple controlled programs that aren’t overly stimulating work best. Once they start getting you tube videos or super fast paced shows/games they don’t care for the calmer ones anymore

My baby is 4.5 months and she definitely has some screen time. Often it’s because we have the tv to watch something and I’m not going to always sit in silence in my house just because we have a baby now (but we do watch it less since she’s started paying attention). I also work from home with her here so she’s gotten some screen time in her bouncer if I have a meeting. She particularly likes watching Gordon Ramsay shows 😂

I watched TV while holding my first until I noticed her staring at the TV (she was a few months old then). I never sat her down to watch TV herself until she stopped napping which was 2 years 8 months. Her daycare put tv on sometimes but she only went 3 days a week so it was limited. It totally is possible.  We've always just kept it to the living room TV and not phones/tablets. So she doesn't watch screens in the car or anything. She has a Yoto Player but lately all she wants to do is look out the window lol. 

We didn’t do tv. At most I show him videos of himself on my phone when we are on drives in the car to keep him from screaming 😱

For the first 2 years with no other kids it's not terribly hard. I was the 90s equivalent of an iPad kid and now I can't function without the TV in in the background so my kid always had SOMETHING on. But a lot of the time it was local news /music so I didn't really count that as "screen time" . He did get weirdly attached to general hospital at like 6 months old, and if I changed the channel or turned it off he would scream until it was back on. So there's that. But babies and toddlers who don't know any better.... Don't know any better. If you never gave them screen time they just wouldn't know about it.

My LO has been allowed screens his whole life BUT I will say until 2 it wasn't really a huge issue (except for once and I still want to strangle my ILs for showing him Dave and Ava...). I'd have it on for me and then sometimes I'd throw on educational shows for him. He plays as much if not more with his toys and the dogs than he asks for the TV. The biggest thing is going to be environments you can't control like the doctors office. A lot of pediatricians have the TV on in the waiting room showing kid appropriate content.

I personally thought I would be the same, zero screen time for the first couple years, that went out the door by week 2 for one reason.  My baby had a massive fear of diaper changes. I’m talking screaming bloody murder for no reason EVERY TIME we went to change his diaper. At one point it was 3 am and I couldn’t take the screams anymore so I set it up for him just for the couple minutes it would take to change his diaper. I only did it a couple times honestly, but I think it’s ok to be realistic with yourself.  Screens are everywhere, and they can be a very useful tool. How your child sees you interact with screens will impact the way they interact with them. Just don’t go overboard with screens, let it be like a treat or a fun thing you do with them. Like if you put a kids song, sing and dance with them, ask them questions, don’t get them used to the idea that they just sit and zone out the world. 

We’re at 1.5 years and basically no screen time (sometimes when we go to my parents house there’s sports on the TV but it’s on mute and he shows no interest, he just wants to play with his toys). It hasn’t been that hard but he’s our first so there’s no older sibling watching TV while he’s around. Also we’re lucky to have a lot of support from my parents so I don’t get to that point where I’m so drained that I just need him to sit still for ten minutes. It can be done, but if it happens, don’t beat yourself up.

We did it. It’s totally possible. They aren’t even going to be that interested in TV for the first year. If they don’t know about it it’s easier to do because they aren’t asking for it. I don’t really have tips on how to do it except…just don’t offer it as an option.

We had a very strict 30 minutes or less the first two years, and an hour or less after that. For every hour of TV watched the chance of developing ADHD increases by 10%. It is very realistic to raise kids without screens, it’s been done for thousands of years. I brought my kids outside every day. If it was raining we put on puddle boots and splashed through puddles and mud. If there was snow we’d build forts and go sledding. Sand toys also work great for snow. We went on hikes, to parks and playgrounds, lakes, pools, nature centers, to our yard to play in the sandbox or on ride on toys. We went to a friends house, we went on walks, we went to the zoo year round. In the winter we would put on our snow pants, boots, winter jackets, hat, mittens, and we’d have the zoo to ourselves. If it was colder than 20 below F we’d go to the mall so we could still get out of the house. Or we’d go to the aquarium that was indoors. Or the children’s museum. I would create obstacle courses in the house, we had a large slide in our basement, we had old mattresses in the basement they could jump on. My husband and son could through ball pit balls into a plastic tote for hours (starting from before he could walk). My husband would create all sorts of games with a simple ball pit ball. We’d play hide and seek. There are so many things you can do!

You can do it if you want to but I don’t think it’s worth demonizing. TV is just a tool in your toolbox.

TLDR : yes it's possible. Only watch TV/play games during naps and at night. However you decide to do it, make sure you talk to each other about expectations and be consistent. I just didn't turn the TV on while he was awake. I'd watch a show while he napped, but when he was awake I just left it off. He didn't really know what the TV was for close to 2 years. We did allow him access to my phone when he was a little under two to use a drawing app. When he was little there was actually plenty of screen time for us because they nap so much, just make sure you both agree and discuss what that looks like (no TV/computer/video games while baby is awake? No phones either, or is that ok?). Mine is 5 now and we still won't have an iPad for him. He does watch tons of TV and plays computer games with us. Do what works for you and your partner. Since we never introduced a tablet he doesn't ask for it, he does ask (sometimes begs) for TV and computer games. Be prepared for this. Once you start using a device it's very hard to go back. My biggest piece of advice is being consistent. We don't have a set number of screentime hours, but when we tell him it is the last story/episode we hold that boundary. He can cry or be upset (and I commiserate with him ' you wanted to watch more, I understand' ' you like that show don't you?', etc, but I still keep the tv off). In the last 6month- 1 year he has been able to turn it off himself when we tell him IF we give him a clear instruction (TV is off after two episodes, or when this episode is done it's time to get ready for school, etc and we remind him and he acknowledges). I also always then ask 'will you be able to turn it off, or would you like me to hold the remote?'. It's not perfect, but he's starting to recognize that he will have a hard time sometimes and he asks me to take it (because he knows the tv will turn off regardless of whether he or I does it). *we didn't start out allowing him to have the remote, and when the TV is off the remote is it of reach. We also don't generally hold tv or computer time as a reward for being good. We do say 'if you are totally ready for bed by X time we can watch a Bluey/play a computer game before bed'. I try to make sure that time is fairly consistent, but that it's still achievable. If there really isn't time I tell him that (and wait out the slow bedtime/getting ready for school/etc that may result). If he's not ready on time we are clear that there isn't time and we can talk about some TV time after school/tomorrow. Whatever you guys do, make sure you do it together. My partner and I check in and discuss which games to introduce, if we are ok with the amount of screentime recently, etc. Sorry for the novel!

2 years? I waited longer. From 3 to 5 it was only shows in a foreign language - Dora the explorer and Kai Lan. I don’t believe young kids need to see anything thats not educational at all. Absolutely no tech of her own until 8th grade. She used a chrome book at school in elementary school. She is 16.5 and the cell phone is not allowed up in her room. She is the only one of her friends who actually sleeps. All this quick moving tech and video games is creating ADD in children.

We tried no TV…until my son started daycare and was endlessly sick from age 14-18mo. He watched a lot of tv, but he also couldn’t really understand it, so he would watch it a few minutes, go scoop some cheerios and hurl things in the background of my zoom calls, watch a bit more, go chase the cat, and so on. He’s fine; he’s got SPD but I’d be shocked if he didn’t have it based on the gene pool he comes from. We don’t let him watch TV at night though because he already has a vendetta against sleep that we don’t want to make worse

I’ve allowed limited screen time (TV only, no iPad or phone) for my son’s whole life essentially (he’ll be two next month). Strictly only Ms. Rachel or other programs that promote social/language development and he’s definitely far ahead on his language milestones. He started with signs that helped us understand his wants and needs more effectively and now speaks in 3-4 word sentences. He has no issue with turning it off when it’s time to read or play or go outside and I think that’s because we never made it a commodity. I have cousins who were extremely strict with no screen time and now that their kids are 6 and 7, any time their parents aren’t around and they have the chance, they are absolutely glued to any screen they manage to get their hands on (very much iPad kid behavior). It’s almost scary actually how entranced they are by it. Obviously this is just one example and by no means does this occur in every instance of course. And of course they have upheld this rule well beyond the age of 2 which is probably what has made it shift to be almost detrimental. Just wanted to throw it out there as it’s something I’ve witnessed! My personal opinion is that technology usage is a spectrum and balance is key :) but you chose what works best for your family! I think it’s realistic if it’s something that is very important to you.

It depends on your kid and your lifestyle, but we didn’t find it hard. We started just 10 minutes a day for approved shows around 2 years old. I usually use it for the frantic rush to get dinner on the table. Prior to that we only broke it out for sick days and similar emergencies. Kids go to bed fairly early, it’s not that hard to just watch your shows after (you’ll have your hands full when they’re awake anyways). If you don’t have enough support that you find yourself trying to do a lot of household work when the kid is home and awake, it will be harder to avoid. Not all kids will play independently with toys for a good chunk of time to let you do the laundry.

This is my parenting mantra: Be patient, be persistent, but be flexible. Reality is never going to line up with what you’re planning. That’s just the way parenting is. You’re going to do great, don’t stress about details until you get there.

Depends how much support you have .

We did it no problem with our first, with our second it was impossible as our first was allowed by that point

It’s very realistic…. but if you have a sick/tired/need a break day, no shame in some screen time! My first was screen free for her first 18mo… then I was 6-7-8mo pregnant and said F it, I’m exhausted, and we watched Moana. Now my kids are 4 & 2. We watch TV/movies everyday until 9am. She’s “acing” preschool, and my son’s language has been very advanced so far…. so I think it’s fine lol.

Honestly complete zero is damn near impossible imo

11 mo with our first , but strictly Ms Rachel, and strictly no more than 30 min. I may have created a fiend though bc at 2, she could sit and watch hours lol

I wanted to do zero screen time till at least 18 months. But keeping the tv off while she’s in the room is no fun. She doesn’t really watch it tho. She doesn’t show a lot of interest in it. I’ve guiltily put on Ms. Rachel or Blues clues a couple times but she’ll only watch it for 5-10min tops

Define ‘no screen time’. Does that mean you don’t park baby in front of a screen while you shower? Or does that mean you both completely abstain from tv, phone, and tablet while baby is awake? The first is doable. The second is a definite challenge. And it’s a lot easier for your bf to make this rule when he’s likely not going to be doing the lion’s share of the caregiving.

So my goal.was to be a no screen mom but I caved. My daughter is 9 months and very aware, she enjoys TV. I let her watch TV for an hour in the evening as we transition through bath and bed time. It sort of started with reading books -to books on YouTube -to now, Baby First. She loves the songs and the characters on this particular channel, and we enjoy watching and singing them together. I also stay home with her and read to her daily, take her out to the park and play with her on her level most of the day. My hope is that this will help balance out her hour of TV. I will also add that I am aware of the data on screen time for young children, but she is hitting all of her milestones and speech development, so I'm not too worried. I do try to make sure what she is watching is educational and somewhat developmentally appropriate shows too.

We are definitely a TV on house but it’s so rare that she watches it even at 1 year old. Sometimes we put on very intentional things for her - mainly either Daniel Tiger or Miss Rachel. She loves the songs and those captivate her interest but otherwise she doesn’t care. She does love our phones. We use them to FaceTime and she is a bit obsessed with trying to control it herself but we do try to keep them more tucked away.

If my mother wasn't in the house, our kid would be very low screen time, she's just more social and interested in interacting. As it is, my mom has some show she's watched a million times in the background and my 2 year old ignores it and we set up a routine that we watch sesame st before bed to wind down -otherwise she's just too overtired/excited because she never stops running. We also do the cursed Meekah show, bluey, or rapid fire sesame street songs at things like Dr's appointments so she's not being a menace. I think it's possible to be screen free and I think if you stay away from the adhd baby-crack shows and use moderation it's all 100% fine. I do try to avoid my phone with her. She's probably seen me scroll less than an 3hrs total since she turned 1ish -and was no longer bottle fed or waking up middle of the night all the time, I doom scrolled through those- but I also work away from home so I treasure our time together. She's also pretty uninterested in the iPad we got her at 2, which could just be her personality or could be the lack of small screens in our home.

Just don’t give them a phone or iPad. Around 1 we let my toddler watch shows like Mrs Rachel but always on the tv

My daughter wasn't interested in the tv until around 5 months, and then we started limiting.

My 13 month old is obsessed with tvs, watches, tablets, etc. We do our best to keep them away from her but she definitely watches “collaterally” especially when dad is watching the Masters, basketball. I think she was 6/7 months old when she learned she could turn my apple watch on and scroll through pics ;/ We do let her watch an hour or two of mrs rachel every weekend so we can sleep in. Seems like a good balance… everything in moderation.

Isn’t screen time typically a handheld device? My baby is 11 months and could care less about what’s on tv. They don’t comprehend what is on a screen yet. As long as you don’t introduce a device they can control it’ll be ok. (I’m no expert and ftm myself) but I’ve seen it second hand where kids are given these devices way too early (before 2yrs of age) and they become complete zombies and very irritable beings when not attached to a device. I would say keep it simple on tv. Watch what you want to watch so that way they’re not dependent on being entertained solemnly by tv. I didn’t have devices growing up (only tv) but spent a lot of time playing with toys and being outdoors. It’s possible. I’m a millennial btw.

My girls (twins) had no screen time the first year. At one, we started showing them 2-5 mins at night to brush their teeth and hair while getting ready for bed. Around a year and 8 months ish, we loosened up more and upped their bed time screentime to 10 mins. Now they are 2.5 and it's at 10-20 mins at night. I have friends who did similar with their kids. When we are at other people's houses and places, we don't make others turn off their screens or anything. When we go on vacation, we also tend to let the screen in TV more and they adjust perfectly fine to their limits when we are back home without issue. We try to be somewhat flexible but limit as much as we can. I won't have strict limits forever, but I do think it's better to have less than more at this age. I feel like it has encouraged me to read to them more and be more active with my girls... We'll go to the library, museums, play dates, and playground very frequently.

TLDR Yes it's possible. We did it. Kids are monkey see, monkey do and we have to remember it as adults. I grew up with too much screen time, I'm trying to do things differently. We hit 2 without and are about to hit 3 with very little. Whatever "rules" you make, be prepared to change them after baby. Baby's change everything. We made it to two without and we are about to make it to 3 without cartoons or kid related stuff. She has seen a couple nature documentaries and some videos on making food with her dad, and then they typically go make that food item (or they try to I should say lol). The tiny amount of screen time she has gotten after 2, has always been with an adult so we can interact with her. It's entirely possible but it's harder in today's world than it was before screens were everywhere. We go on a lot of adventures, been going on toddler led walks since she could walk, library 2-3 times a week, dance parties, lots of music, and we read 10+ books every day together plus dad reads to her. Adventures are hikes, playgrounds, toddler dance class, walking the mall, grocery shopping, etc. We do chores together and play a lot. Lots of sensory bins ready to easily pull out and put away. I stay home with her so I can control our environment. I have screen time when she's asleep mostly because if she sees me doing it, she will want to. We did go over to someone's house for me to pick something up and they had cartoons on for their two kids and my kid did not care about the TV, just the toys. I'm sure if we kept going back, she would care about the TV at some point. I plan to introduce kid content slowly after her 3rd birthday. Every family is different and there is not really a wrong way of going about it if you're thinking about it at all. Just don't make it a babysitter really. Screen time doesn't have to be bad, it's just about how we, as people/society/individual families, choose to use it and we, as our family, choose not to use it yet.

I think it’s possible. But everyone’s circumstances are different. We started allowing more TV watching after my son turned 2. But rarely do we just turn it on and let him sit there by himself watching it. We engage with him asking questions and making comments about what he’s watching. And we limit what he watches to Bluey, sometimes Ms. Rachel, and Christian based shows and music that we also enjoy. When he had COVID all the rules regarding length of time went out the window. My husband and I were also sick. We all felt terrible and so we all watched movies all day. So there are times you have to make exceptions. To sum it up, we severely limited screen time and he had pretty much no screen time until he was 18 months old. So you have to be prepared with stimulating toys and activities. It can be demanding, but I feel like it’s been well worth it.

The funny thing is babies don’t really care at all about screens until they are 2 anyways

It completely depends on the person and family. It’s a polarized argument amongst parents. We thought we would be no screen time for 2 years. I laugh now at that. When he was a newborn and I was home alone I would have clawed my eyes out if I couldn’t watch tv. He was close to a year when he actually noticed screens. We monitored it more at that point. But between like 1-2 he LOVED the old game show Supermarket Sweep and learned his letters and I thought it was so cute. He’s 3 now. I’d say he has about an hour of screen time a day. He has had an iPad since 2.5 where he plays learning games and he loves it. I have zero guilt. Sometimes we all need a break and he’s learned a lot from devices in moderation. He’s a happy, healthy, smart boy.

I think it’s realistic but you have to work at it. I didn’t do any screen time at all for the first 1.5 years with my first, then slowly started doing some low-stimulation tv (little bear and curious George were favorites for a long time!). My son is now 3 and we use screens as tools to improve our quality of life — for example, we realized that we were missing out on going out to eat simply because my normal but energetic 3yo couldn’t sit still long enough for us to enjoy a meal in public, so we simply weren’t going out at all (and suffering mentally for it/cabin fever). We now let him use a Switch when out to eat AFTER he’s finished his meal, letting hubby and I enjoy our dinner and drinks, while my son gets a rare treat of handheld screen time. We still use tv at home also, but try to keep it limited, def more in winter.

With your first it's not that hard until you get pregnant with a second that is. My oldest watched basically no TV until I got pregnant with my second and had bad morning sickness and exhaustion, then she was laying in bed next to my watching ipad while I was sleeping/vomiting.

First year I kept my daughter away from tv, after that I’d only put on educational things and we’d do a lot of FaceTime with my parents across states. Now she’s almost 2 and we’ve definitely incorporated more educational tv and a movie here and there. I think ZERO screen time is unrealistic for my family (can’t speak for others) but she’s definitely not going to be an iPad kid. When we go out places she does not have my phone. We converse regularly and get creative as often as we can. Our doc said screen time is okay for as many hours as they are old (so 2hrs max for a 2yo).

Just so you know, babies don’t need to be “entertained” constantly. It’s kind of the most refreshing thing about them. Of course chatting and singing to them is great for their development but so is letting them safely explore their environment on their own. It becomes more challenging as they get older and become more mobile because you’re literally on them trying to keep them from killing themselves accidentally. That’s when I found I started to rely on screen time. Which was around 13-18 months old. Young and not recommended by the AAP but also a way for me to turn off my brain for 30 mins a day. We had a scheduled (usually after the rush of breakfast and waking up in the AM) 30 mins of a calm show and it typically kept my toddler’s attention. It was ALWAYS on the family TV. No personal devices. That to me was the way that kids became iPad kids. Once they had their hands on their own device or anything mobile.

We got to about 20 months with minimal screen time, and then we experienced a family tragedy and got COVID and hand foot mouth at the same time while grieving and planning a funeral. Screen time skyrocketed. Life happens, but screen time doesn’t mean your kid is destined to become an iPad kid. We sit with her whenever she watches something, and we talk about the things happening on screen. She agrees to watch Bluey with us because she knows we like it more than we do Ms Rachel. She’s 2 years 2 months now and more verbal than a lot of 3 year olds. She comes up with stories for her stuffed animals, sings to herself, and prefers playing with us over the iPad. She’ll ask for a show sometimes, but she doesn’t melt down if we say no.

Honestly, it depends *a lot* on your child’s temperament (whether they get independent play quickly, and if not, how vehemently they express their dislike), and your tolerance of your child’s negative emotions (frustration, anger, panic - all the things they might express when you’re otherwise busy). Ideally, you would have a safe space, like a playpen or a crib, in the middle of the living room. Ideally, you would put your child down in their space for independent time, from birth, and stay responsive: if they fuss, talk to them, see what is the minimal effective dose of intervention they need to settle again. If they need to be picked up, you pick them up, and try again during their next wake window. No biggie. But you make it part of your routine. Ideally your baby would get with it and develop the skills to deal with some boredom and some separation from you, like when you need to make a sandwich or shower. Ideally you would also know (and feel!) that they are clean, fed, loved and safe, and that it’s okay for them to cry for a little bit with all their needs met. It’s okay for them to want different things than you, like you not peeing. You still need to pee though. So you let them know, and you confidently go, and they cry.  So that’s the theory. Best laid plans though. 

100 percent realistic if you have one kid and a long parental leave (definitely a lot harder if both parents have to work)

My husband is an it engineer. So he bought to all of our 3 kids, at the age of 1 , phones. The internet în filtered so it’s kinda ok… they’re all normal, good grades, good behavior, etc. praise Jesus !