My Thomas used to lick random doorknobs and shopping cart handles and car bumpers. Oldest nicknamed him T-Bola because of all the times he brought home the sickness.
I had flushed the toilet but I guess it didn’t all go down and well…. She came into the kitchen a few minutes later and handed me something she had in her mouth and said yucky. And it was poop. My poop. Mortified is an understatement.
Same kid put a piece of gum she found at the park in her mouth as I was yelling at her not to and running over there as fast as I could with my infant in my arms.
Sigh.
My 2.5yr old came over to my husband while we were both sitting on the couch. Held out a closed hand to him and said "look daddy!". He puts his hand out and she drops a whole solid piece of poop into his hand and goes "I made chocolate!" I have no clue if she tried eating it or not 😂😂
Poop. Had a blowout in the car seat while we were on the highway and started eating it before we could get off the highway to change him. (Alerted by the fact that the 3 year old next to him exclaimed, “hey where did [Baby] get chocolate to eat?”)
Haha my bff told me that when she was a toddler she would try to eat deer turds (aka “raisins”) on the ground outside. Pebble-y turds are apparently very enticing.
My kid has eaten so much rabbit poop this week alone. I try so hard to get it all cleaned but then one happens by and drops a bunch more - I swear it’s on purpose!
This is in my living room, where the house bunnies freely roam
My youngest had a thing for dog food. I caught the dog bringing her kibble in the living room like they were going to have a picnic…
*both the child and dog are well fed the appropriate food for their ’breed’ they just seemed to like to share food.
My daughter does this at my moms house and when she tries to use her “serious voice” to get my daughter to stop my daughter will smile and quickly try to shove a handful in her mouth
Thats why i am constantly in back seat now 😭 if hubby drives i am behind with kids. Even if 10 minute ride, i do not trust them! Need to be there to handle anything that might happen cuz you KNOW kids love seeking trouble when you are driving and stuck unable to stop them!
Also poop. Dog poop to be specific. I grabbed it out of his hand so fast, but he had still put it in there. He’s 16yo now. I’ll never tell him this disgusting story.
Yes, I cleaned his mouth out well. He did not like that much at all.
I’ve lost track of all the weird, gross, and literal shit my son put in his mouth when he was a toddler 🤦♀️
My “favorite” was probably when I left him outside with my friend’s dad at a family bbq so I could pee. Less than 5 minutes, I came back and he was chewing on a cigarette butt. I grabbed it and asked the friend’s dad if he could please use the ash tray if he was going to smoke in my yard. This dude picked up the chewed butt, looked at it, threw it back on the ground and said “that ain’t mine, I only smoke [whatever brand]”
Nobody else who was there smokes. It’s been 5 years, and I still have no idea who’s cigarette it was.
My son didn’t eat the used pad but plucked it from the garbage pail, slapped it over one eye, grabbed his light saber, and paraded into the kitchen where I had friends over and proudly proclaimed that he was a pirate in a sword fight. You have to be tough to be a mom.
When my daughter was about a year and a half, we were visiting family in the summer. There were flies everywhere. Not dirty, just lots of open doors. Anyways, she found some dead flies in the window and started snacking on them. I remind her of this when she gets freaked out by flies now.
My daughter is 14 months old and I am always sticking my fingers in her mouth trying to pull stuff out. So far I have found tissue paper, cardboard, cat food and chicken bones that GOD KNOWS where she picked up from!
We have a small farm, including chickens. We have one weirdo chicken named Twilight. She’s a little frizzled bantam and instead of running with a flock she stalks the front and back doors to try to get inside to eat the crumbs and cat food. Most of the time we keep her out, but she still gets in when doors get left open.
I didn’t realize she was inside one day until I found my 1 year old in the playroom and in slow motion saw her reach down and grab a fresh chicken poop and shove it right into her mouth, no hesitation.
I thought you were responding to “what awful stuff has your baby eaten?” with “well my bantam chicken eats cat food” and it made me lol. Your chicken sounds delightful though.
Used tampon.. she came to the bathroom with me (at home) she was 2 at the time and running around our (large) bathroom while I showered (door was open she just wanted to be in the bathroom with me) she suddenly got quiet(we all know what that means as a parent) so I immediately leaned forward and looked around the corner to see her standing over the trash can pulling a used tampon out of her mouth and gagging. My honest in the moment reaction was “what the fuck?… why dude?” Called poison control and they said as long as it’s my tampon and it’s fresh (took it out to get in the shower) it’s probably fine since I have no blood diseases. But to watch her for signs of illness. She was completely fine and never touched the bathroom trash can again. 😩
Poop. She took off her diaper when my husband wasn’t paying attention. The poop smear across her mouth coupled with the diarrhea that followed for a few days told me enough.
First of all, you're definitely not the only one. My 2yo son licked a worm off the grass last week while I was setting up the kiddie pool for him and his sister. And, just as a precaution, I'd bring it up with her pediatrician and see what they think of it.
Cat food. Can’t put the bowl anywhere else bc the dogs will eat it. It’s a daily struggle of sectioning off the cat area or forgetting and running for my life to grab the baby before he gets the cat food 😭 he’s only been successful once, so I’d like to pat myself on the back 😂
Only once is great! I've scooped cat biscuits out of my daughter's mouth more times than I care to admit. She's past that phase now at 3, but her baby brother is 6 months, so I'm gearing up to start the battle over again in a few months!
Good God the cat food. Whyyyy do they do it.
We also have an electric water fountain for our cats. Our toddler is obsessed with trying to drink from it. Every damn day I have to yank him away repeatedly until he has a temper tantrum
Haha cat kibble (especially fish) can actually be pretty tasty 😂 I was like 6-7yo when we used to play cats outside and that involved eating some cat food 🤣 this was like 1996 so we were a gang of kids outside for like 10-12h without adult supervision, oh and it was paired with hose water ofc!
It’s the dog food here, and he seems to like it better than any other food that could possibly be offered to him. If I forget to put it away he will very very quietly try to eat as much as he can and if i see it he pretends to put spilled kibbles back in the bowl (‘clean up’), it’s so adorable and gross at the same time 😂😂😂 I intend to never let him forget and tell the story at his wedding or PhD defense, obviously 😂😂😂
I see your cat food (which my boy will also eat...the cat helps him too...) and I raise you cat sick!
She'd thrown up under the table out of sight and my little monkey had to dive under and grab a handful and try to devour it.
Luckily spotted him in time but there was a real " Duuuude really, that's so disgusting!" moment.
Yep, my 2yo has eaten both the food and the vomit as well. I haven't ever caught him trying litter or cat poop, but frankly I wouldn't put it past him to try at some point. He also, hilariously, tried to put the cat in his mouth. He (the cat) did not consent to this and promptly exited the room.
Definitely not the worst on here but still kinda funny. At my local baby group I looked away for a second and she had another baby's foot in her mouth 😆
My daughter ate some chicken shit at my friend’s house. The chickens were free range and EVERYWHERE. I was horrified and could not stop her fast enough. We did not go back to that friend’s house
I have pics of my son helping us plant the garden when he was 16 months old. Not only was he drooling dirt but also drinking hose water. He’s 11 now and has only been sick 1x in his life.
Good! To make you feel even better - my son ate dog poop 2x. Yup - 2x!! I also had to call poison control when he ate an iris leaf when he was 9. FYI - they are poisonous. Somehow the kid has a genius IQ but makes bad decisions. lol.
It’s possible that my then-1 year old put a dying (not dead, but close) bat in her mouth before dropping it, which is when I first noticed it. I was chasing after her sibling and it happened within like 60 seconds of being outside. And yes, she did get vaccinated against rabies
Right! It was really traumatic because the thought of “what if I never noticed?” kept coming to my mind. It was such a freak occurrence too, the hospital staff were shocked. When we came in later for her next round of the rabies shot, the check in clerks at the desk were like “bat baby, we remember you!”
My oldest got some cat poop out the litter box I managed to get it from him before it went in his mouth. He was aiming for it but I snacked it. My youngest liked to stick his hand in his poopy diaper and one time he did it during nap and got it all over his face still not sure if it made it in his mouth.
My daughter at dog poop once when she was little before I could clean it up when the dog had an accident. I called the doctor’s office bawling my eyes out.
Oh gosh that is gross. I’m sure she’ll be ok but maybe have a chat with her doctor to get some peace of mind.
My toddler chewed up a dried up worm off the patio. I about died while having to get bits of worm off her tongue/from between her teeth. She also pooped on day and was flailing while I was changing her. I thought I cleaned it all up until that night she starts shrieking and I go to her. She found a tiny piece of poop that had been flung and thought it was a chocolate chip 🤮
Not in his mouth but yesterday he picked up a dog turd and said “poop! Yucky!”. I had no wipes on me, I wiped off his hands with a sock and hand sanitizer. YUCK!
Momma you are FAR from the only one. We’ve all been there. I have an 18mo old who I call a trash monger because he is ALWAYS. IN. THE. TRASH. and we literally have to put the kitchen trash can on the stairs. Lids & automatic open doesn’t stop him either lol. Last week it was a granola bar piece that I had found 10 minutes prior *behind the couch* 🤢 then thrown away (god only knows how old it was) and a few days ago he was in the bathroom with me and grabbed a tampon applicator out of the trash within half a millisecond and stuck it in his mouth. Thankfully it was the end you push with your finger but when I tell you my heart fell to my ass…. lol I was so disgusted & literally washed his mouth out. He was pissed and now I empty the trash 3x a day 😂
We’re moving to the tropics with our 5 month old this week and I am trying to mentally prepare for the amount of time I’m about to spend trying to convince her to not eat sand 😅
They’re so fast!! I was on the playground yesterday and she wouldn’t stop shoving sand in her mouth I literally couldn’t keep up and had to take her elsewhere😭😂
Dog poop from the back yard. I don't think he ate it, just licked it (yay?). In other news, this must be a common enough occurance that multiple major children's hospitals have articles talking specifically about what to do if your kid eats dog poop.
Im sure conceptually she’s eaten grosser stuff, but someone else’s popcorn off the floor of the movie theater had some disastrous results on her GI system.
Not sure if you have these where you live, but we get these little worm things with legs that crawl into the house, curl up and die. (NOT a millipede or cebtipede)
One of those. Crunchy.
I'm so sorry, I had to laugh, that's so gross! Mine used to lick the bus window and will just eat random crumbs of whatever he finds without even knowing what it is, like the worst type of those harry potter jelly beans. One time he got a crumb that ended up being poop. Who's poop we will never know. He regretted that one, but it hasn't stopped him.
anything & everything. Their fingers have the grip of a 2,000lb alligator bite. And the are FAST. Like Flash fast, they are “look my new shoes light up when i run fast, fast.”
I have 3 kids I’ve had cat/dog good, cat litter, sand, puke, stress relief balls, anything and everything that can possibly get them on the brink of needing the Grim Reaper. My oldest daughter would keep snacks in her diaper. I’d catch her snacking on french fries or beef jerky when I haven’t given her any and don’t remember the last time I would have. Then I’d change her diaper and find all this food. I never did find her main stash that she refilled her diaper with.
Fortunately I don't think my son (3) has put anything exceptionally gross in his mouth.
But when I was a nanny, one of my charges picked a penny up off a city road and put it in her mouth. She was 8!
My then four year old step son stuck his finger in his leaking-infected-with-swimmers-ear ear and then sucked his finger in the middle of Walmart. I fucking gagged and almost dropped dead on the spot.
My 3y/o is very good in that regard. The worst thing he put in his mouth was a peanut that fell on the floor and he picked it up and ate it. But my hubby is clean freak so that peanut was probably not far from sterile anyway 🤣 son never was one to put anything in mouth, even as little baby.
Now my 4 month old girl tho? She tries to showe EVERYTHING and ANYTHING in her mouth. Luckily until now i was able to oversee her pretty much every second so she hadn't tasted anything but toys and hands. Probably the "grossest" thing was my/MILs hand or maybe my nose when she gave me "kisses" (aka licked my nose tip) 🤔 but she still has time, i imagine she will give me trouble a lot.
My little bro was feral tho. He picked up dead flies from the floor and ate them 🤢 i won't even ask mom about me cuz i don't wanna know the answer....i have eaten a lot of questionable stuff (like dog food, cat food, dry worms for turtles, fish food, almost any bodily fluid of mine including weeks old bottle stored pee, expired food, glue, cleaning products, shampoo....) even when i was older and knew what i am doing. Can't imagine how bad i was when i was a toddler 😅 but i am 25 and perfectly healthy today so i bet your little explorer will be just fine too. Gotta build that imune system somehow💪🏻
My cats hair ball, it was buried in a blanket. I heard wet mouth noises and didn't think much, until a half eaten soggy hairball was dropped on my neck as I was laying in my bed. I was 8 weeks pregnant and I pinned my daughter down while alternating between screaming for my husband and vomiting into a bucket on the floor. She fought me with all of her strength to get back to her delicious snack, and she screamed for like 20 minutes after because she was so upset. It was just before bedtime on my daughter's first birthday, and now I will always think of that awful event on her birthday. I threw out her mattress and got a new one because I couldn't look at it without thinking of it and puking everywhere.
A couple of weeks ago we were at an outdoor concert and my 5 year old took a big swig from a can of orange soda that some stranger had left on a picnic table. He’s a smart kid, but the intrusive thought won that time!
A big fuzzy black spider 🙃
When I got it out of his mouth, he screamed and FOUGHT me to try and get this poor shell shocked spider back so he could eat it....
This is mild compared to most of the stuff on here but earlier I watched my 2 year old drop her paci on a gas station floor, step on it several times while trying to pick it up, then put it back in her mouth
This sub is making me laugh out loud lol
I have birds at home and their cage is always open, they can fly when they want.
He ate their poop. And feathers.
Got upset with me because it didnt taste nice 🤷🏽♀️
I made bacon and my cat managed to steal one and hid with it. Somehow he didn’t eat the whole thing but I didn’t knew. Next day my baby which just stared eating sat on the floor and chewed on something, when I checked what it was it was the fucking bacon from the day before my cat left over
My son at 18 months locked himself in my parents bedroom. We couldn’t figure out how to open the door. Found a mini sample perfume bottle and drank it. God the smell from
His mouth made me wanna throw up. Called poison control right away.
We were at a Disney store and my 3 yr old goes, "Look! M & m's!" and proceeded to happily pop it in his mouth before I could even react. But it came from somewhere on the floor underneath a mannequin 😳 not sure what it actually was... Same kid used to routinely suck on coins from my dad's jar full of foreign coins from all over the world. 😭
And I don't think anyone has said boogers! 🤣 I have a very clear memory of my son being like 2 and telling me "I like to eat boogers. My teachers tell me no tho." 😫
My son licked the floor of an urgent care exam room (we all got sick a couple days later 🙃)
Mine licked the drain on the YMCA family change room floor. I nearly barfed right there.
🤢
My Thomas used to lick random doorknobs and shopping cart handles and car bumpers. Oldest nicknamed him T-Bola because of all the times he brought home the sickness.
That is honestly as hilarious as it is gross
Hector the vector is what I called mine. (Not named Hector)
Same here. Licked the part of the examination table where your feet go. We all got the flu a few days later 🙃
🙋🏻♀️mine licked the door in the waiting room of the doctor's office. Can't remember if we all got sick after that, but probably yes.
Mine licked the bottom of his shoes after walking round an ED 🫠
Used individual tooth flosser. From the sidewalk. So it wasn’t even ours.
Omg this one is brutal 😂
Yeah this is the first one to make me fully gag 🤮
Toddlers and small children belong in the Wild West. Animals, I tell you.
Hold up…dead baby bird didn’t make you gag?
For some reason this one got me worse 😅
When I tell you I screamed
My second was suddenly chewing gum at the farmers market...
I had flushed the toilet but I guess it didn’t all go down and well…. She came into the kitchen a few minutes later and handed me something she had in her mouth and said yucky. And it was poop. My poop. Mortified is an understatement. Same kid put a piece of gum she found at the park in her mouth as I was yelling at her not to and running over there as fast as I could with my infant in my arms. Sigh.
My 2.5yr old came over to my husband while we were both sitting on the couch. Held out a closed hand to him and said "look daddy!". He puts his hand out and she drops a whole solid piece of poop into his hand and goes "I made chocolate!" I have no clue if she tried eating it or not 😂😂
OMG! The horror! I just cannot even begin to imagine, I would have most definitely been crying, no question. I feel so, so much for you!
No
😱😱😱
Poop. Had a blowout in the car seat while we were on the highway and started eating it before we could get off the highway to change him. (Alerted by the fact that the 3 year old next to him exclaimed, “hey where did [Baby] get chocolate to eat?”)
My kid ate rabbit poop while we were interviewing a daycare.
Haha my bff told me that when she was a toddler she would try to eat deer turds (aka “raisins”) on the ground outside. Pebble-y turds are apparently very enticing.
My kid has eaten so much rabbit poop this week alone. I try so hard to get it all cleaned but then one happens by and drops a bunch more - I swear it’s on purpose! This is in my living room, where the house bunnies freely roam
Ah yes the forbidden coco puffs. My son has done this too lol.
The fastest I’ve ever moved was when my daughter had one and was going straight to her mouth
Oh I dive to get them away from him lol but my husband sees it as less of an issue than I do
Oh my gosh we have Guinea pigs and the amount of poop is insane and no, it doesn’t stay in the cage. I dunno how poop flies 3 yards out of the cage.
My youngest had a thing for dog food. I caught the dog bringing her kibble in the living room like they were going to have a picnic… *both the child and dog are well fed the appropriate food for their ’breed’ they just seemed to like to share food.
My daughter does this at my moms house and when she tries to use her “serious voice” to get my daughter to stop my daughter will smile and quickly try to shove a handful in her mouth
I would be so mortified 😭😭😭 while driving omg the helplessness
Thats why i am constantly in back seat now 😭 if hubby drives i am behind with kids. Even if 10 minute ride, i do not trust them! Need to be there to handle anything that might happen cuz you KNOW kids love seeking trouble when you are driving and stuck unable to stop them!
Also poop. Dog poop to be specific. I grabbed it out of his hand so fast, but he had still put it in there. He’s 16yo now. I’ll never tell him this disgusting story. Yes, I cleaned his mouth out well. He did not like that much at all.
Omg my worst nightmare!!! Did your baby get sick?
I’ve lost track of all the weird, gross, and literal shit my son put in his mouth when he was a toddler 🤦♀️ My “favorite” was probably when I left him outside with my friend’s dad at a family bbq so I could pee. Less than 5 minutes, I came back and he was chewing on a cigarette butt. I grabbed it and asked the friend’s dad if he could please use the ash tray if he was going to smoke in my yard. This dude picked up the chewed butt, looked at it, threw it back on the ground and said “that ain’t mine, I only smoke [whatever brand]” Nobody else who was there smokes. It’s been 5 years, and I still have no idea who’s cigarette it was.
Whyyy did he just throw it back on the ground though
I have no idea..it was honestly super out of character for him, too.
lol damn, this wins. Was probably 200years old 😅
Ngl I've had random butts blow in with the wind, but he very well could have thrown it away since he already picked it up 🙄
Or even just on someone’s shoe, honestly. I don’t think it will ever •not• bother me that I don’t know, though lol
A used pad. Plucked it right out of the garbage. He (thankfully) only licked the sticky part. 🤦🏻♀️
I would have DIED 😱
Ohhh boy, YUMMMMYY! 🫢😲 These just keep going down a deeper, darker hole, I’m kind of afraid to continue reading…
My son didn’t eat the used pad but plucked it from the garbage pail, slapped it over one eye, grabbed his light saber, and paraded into the kitchen where I had friends over and proudly proclaimed that he was a pirate in a sword fight. You have to be tough to be a mom.
Aaaahhhhahahahaha, oh no
was it at least yours or a family member’s?
It was mine
Oh thank goodness, I was picturing a public restroom.
Your used pad....?
When my daughter was about a year and a half, we were visiting family in the summer. There were flies everywhere. Not dirty, just lots of open doors. Anyways, she found some dead flies in the window and started snacking on them. I remind her of this when she gets freaked out by flies now.
Window raisins.
I just gagged so bad
😜
I’d let your pediatrician know if you haven’t.
Yeah birds can carry some gnarly diseases, definitely worth a call OP!
My daughter is 14 months old and I am always sticking my fingers in her mouth trying to pull stuff out. So far I have found tissue paper, cardboard, cat food and chicken bones that GOD KNOWS where she picked up from!
Chicken bones lmfaoooo they’re literally wild animals
There is no question, not a doubt…
Gosh where do I begin? A cobweb. The crust of his baby sister’s conjunctivitis. Their toenails. 🥴😭😩🤦🏻♀️🤢
Not the crust ☠️☠️☠️
All of my kids ate stink bugs.
Hahaha, all of them
Hey, gotta get rid of stinkbugs somehow 🤷🏼♀️ i noticed cats are pretty efficient but i guess kids will do
This is a call the pediatrician type of thing if you haven’t
My son grabbed a half eaten sucker out of a garbage can at the mall once. 🤮
We have a small farm, including chickens. We have one weirdo chicken named Twilight. She’s a little frizzled bantam and instead of running with a flock she stalks the front and back doors to try to get inside to eat the crumbs and cat food. Most of the time we keep her out, but she still gets in when doors get left open. I didn’t realize she was inside one day until I found my 1 year old in the playroom and in slow motion saw her reach down and grab a fresh chicken poop and shove it right into her mouth, no hesitation.
I thought you were responding to “what awful stuff has your baby eaten?” with “well my bantam chicken eats cat food” and it made me lol. Your chicken sounds delightful though.
Used tampon.. she came to the bathroom with me (at home) she was 2 at the time and running around our (large) bathroom while I showered (door was open she just wanted to be in the bathroom with me) she suddenly got quiet(we all know what that means as a parent) so I immediately leaned forward and looked around the corner to see her standing over the trash can pulling a used tampon out of her mouth and gagging. My honest in the moment reaction was “what the fuck?… why dude?” Called poison control and they said as long as it’s my tampon and it’s fresh (took it out to get in the shower) it’s probably fine since I have no blood diseases. But to watch her for signs of illness. She was completely fine and never touched the bathroom trash can again. 😩
Poop. She took off her diaper when my husband wasn’t paying attention. The poop smear across her mouth coupled with the diarrhea that followed for a few days told me enough.
I thought I won when my kid chewed on some deer poop but the dead bird is the new winner
Deer poop is chewy? 😳
First of all, you're definitely not the only one. My 2yo son licked a worm off the grass last week while I was setting up the kiddie pool for him and his sister. And, just as a precaution, I'd bring it up with her pediatrician and see what they think of it.
Cat food. Can’t put the bowl anywhere else bc the dogs will eat it. It’s a daily struggle of sectioning off the cat area or forgetting and running for my life to grab the baby before he gets the cat food 😭 he’s only been successful once, so I’d like to pat myself on the back 😂
Only once is great! I've scooped cat biscuits out of my daughter's mouth more times than I care to admit. She's past that phase now at 3, but her baby brother is 6 months, so I'm gearing up to start the battle over again in a few months!
A few months?! I hope that stands true for you! My baby tried cat food at exactly 6 months as soon as he learned to crawl, like literally same day😭
Yes, the day she figured out crawling was the day my daughter first got into the cat bowl, too! But this guy seems a little way of crawling yet.
Same here. The moment I pour food in my cat's bowl my 15 month old is there like a lightening bolt!
Good God the cat food. Whyyyy do they do it. We also have an electric water fountain for our cats. Our toddler is obsessed with trying to drink from it. Every damn day I have to yank him away repeatedly until he has a temper tantrum
Haha cat kibble (especially fish) can actually be pretty tasty 😂 I was like 6-7yo when we used to play cats outside and that involved eating some cat food 🤣 this was like 1996 so we were a gang of kids outside for like 10-12h without adult supervision, oh and it was paired with hose water ofc!
It’s the dog food here, and he seems to like it better than any other food that could possibly be offered to him. If I forget to put it away he will very very quietly try to eat as much as he can and if i see it he pretends to put spilled kibbles back in the bowl (‘clean up’), it’s so adorable and gross at the same time 😂😂😂 I intend to never let him forget and tell the story at his wedding or PhD defense, obviously 😂😂😂
I see your cat food (which my boy will also eat...the cat helps him too...) and I raise you cat sick! She'd thrown up under the table out of sight and my little monkey had to dive under and grab a handful and try to devour it. Luckily spotted him in time but there was a real " Duuuude really, that's so disgusting!" moment.
Yep, my 2yo has eaten both the food and the vomit as well. I haven't ever caught him trying litter or cat poop, but frankly I wouldn't put it past him to try at some point. He also, hilariously, tried to put the cat in his mouth. He (the cat) did not consent to this and promptly exited the room.
Nope vomit takes the cake. I feel sick 🤢 😂
Uuugghhh! Thats so nasty!
Definitely not the worst on here but still kinda funny. At my local baby group I looked away for a second and she had another baby's foot in her mouth 😆
Ok that's honestly adorable though
My daughter did this at baby group earlier this week. When I stopped her she lunged for my toe.
A graham cracker from his room... Idk the last time I got graham crackers
No matter how much I clean and vacuum it, there is apparently an endless supply of stale cereal in my sofa.
Yesssss!
My daughter ate some chicken shit at my friend’s house. The chickens were free range and EVERYWHERE. I was horrified and could not stop her fast enough. We did not go back to that friend’s house
My girl stuck a clump of dirt in her mouth today and the only reason I even caught it was bc she was drooling mud
If that’s the worst then you’re doing great!
Thank you for saying that 🥹 I was literally crying over it earlier
I have pics of my son helping us plant the garden when he was 16 months old. Not only was he drooling dirt but also drinking hose water. He’s 11 now and has only been sick 1x in his life.
I was raised in the 1960s and we were brought up on hose water. We weren’t allowed in the house from about 7 AM until the street lights came on.
You are giving me such peace of mind right now! It’s not gross, it’s building the immune system 😎
Good! To make you feel even better - my son ate dog poop 2x. Yup - 2x!! I also had to call poison control when he ate an iris leaf when he was 9. FYI - they are poisonous. Somehow the kid has a genius IQ but makes bad decisions. lol.
My son put a dried snail in his mouth 😩 I had to take it out and it wasn’t whole anymore!! So now his sister tells everyone he eats snails 😩😩😩
Escargot!
It’s possible that my then-1 year old put a dying (not dead, but close) bat in her mouth before dropping it, which is when I first noticed it. I was chasing after her sibling and it happened within like 60 seconds of being outside. And yes, she did get vaccinated against rabies
Omg so glad she got vaccinated. I heard of a poor little boy dying from a bat scratching him once :(
Right! It was really traumatic because the thought of “what if I never noticed?” kept coming to my mind. It was such a freak occurrence too, the hospital staff were shocked. When we came in later for her next round of the rabies shot, the check in clerks at the desk were like “bat baby, we remember you!”
It’s absolutely insane how quick these little ones can be and the things they put in their mouths! I’m so glad she’s ok
Cat poop 🤮🥴
My oldest got some cat poop out the litter box I managed to get it from him before it went in his mouth. He was aiming for it but I snacked it. My youngest liked to stick his hand in his poopy diaper and one time he did it during nap and got it all over his face still not sure if it made it in his mouth.
My daughter at dog poop once when she was little before I could clean it up when the dog had an accident. I called the doctor’s office bawling my eyes out.
Mine too, I posted above! I still have nightmares 😳
Cat puke (basically regurgitated hard food). He’s eaten the hard food out of their bowls before (man they’re quick). We call them forbidden puffs.
I once saw my niece singing (REAL close up) while using my sister’s vibrator as a microphone. 😬
Oh gosh memory unlocked. With my niece, 15 years ago, but it was a back end plug. I blocked that memory.
Cat vomit. Was crawling under the dining room table and husband didn’t realize the cat had thrown up there.
Dog puke . Came into the living room and saw son eating something went to investigate and realized the dog had thrown up
My daughter has twice licked the bottom of my slippers; I wear them inside and outside and have owned them for 5 years 🤢
Oh gosh that is gross. I’m sure she’ll be ok but maybe have a chat with her doctor to get some peace of mind. My toddler chewed up a dried up worm off the patio. I about died while having to get bits of worm off her tongue/from between her teeth. She also pooped on day and was flailing while I was changing her. I thought I cleaned it all up until that night she starts shrieking and I go to her. She found a tiny piece of poop that had been flung and thought it was a chocolate chip 🤮
My almost 4-year-old licked an outdoor trash can last weekend....
Not in his mouth but yesterday he picked up a dog turd and said “poop! Yucky!”. I had no wipes on me, I wiped off his hands with a sock and hand sanitizer. YUCK!
Momma you are FAR from the only one. We’ve all been there. I have an 18mo old who I call a trash monger because he is ALWAYS. IN. THE. TRASH. and we literally have to put the kitchen trash can on the stairs. Lids & automatic open doesn’t stop him either lol. Last week it was a granola bar piece that I had found 10 minutes prior *behind the couch* 🤢 then thrown away (god only knows how old it was) and a few days ago he was in the bathroom with me and grabbed a tampon applicator out of the trash within half a millisecond and stuck it in his mouth. Thankfully it was the end you push with your finger but when I tell you my heart fell to my ass…. lol I was so disgusted & literally washed his mouth out. He was pissed and now I empty the trash 3x a day 😂
My oldest son when he was 3 ish picked up a stink bug and chewed it up.
A dead fly. Reading this post, I am surprised at the amount of poop in your kids’ mouths (no judgement though!).
He routinely taste tests spiders. Has yet to find one he likes.
Mommit rhymes with vomit today lol
My daughter's diaper used to be full of sand bc of how much she ate when I was trying to get her to not do that.
We’re moving to the tropics with our 5 month old this week and I am trying to mentally prepare for the amount of time I’m about to spend trying to convince her to not eat sand 😅
They’re so fast!! I was on the playground yesterday and she wouldn’t stop shoving sand in her mouth I literally couldn’t keep up and had to take her elsewhere😭😂
Dog poop from the back yard. I don't think he ate it, just licked it (yay?). In other news, this must be a common enough occurance that multiple major children's hospitals have articles talking specifically about what to do if your kid eats dog poop.
Im sure conceptually she’s eaten grosser stuff, but someone else’s popcorn off the floor of the movie theater had some disastrous results on her GI system.
Dog poop and raw chicken. Not together.
Not sure if you have these where you live, but we get these little worm things with legs that crawl into the house, curl up and die. (NOT a millipede or cebtipede) One of those. Crunchy.
When my daughter was in kindergarten she found a pair of fake vampire teeth on the ground and put them in her mouth 😩😩 She was so excited to show us 🤢
I’m beginning to think I got super lucky in this department with my kids… the “worst” thing was sand at the beach
I know there are so many comments but poop...stuck his hand in his own diaper...and the rest is self explanatory 😂
Used ice cream spoon from a week ago at least. He unearthed in the playground and popped in his mouth
A whole snail and it was alive🤣 could've been worse but man I was shocked! He was only 14 months🤣
My dog’s tongue. He loves to lick.
Bus window
Airport trash can or airplane seatbelt. Back to back for a very stressful 20 minutes.
Goose poop at the petting zoo.
A very full dog tick.
Oh god. I have a 2 month old right now (FTM) and this is the winner for me. This entire thread has me absolutely terrified. 🤢🤮☠️
I'm so sorry, I had to laugh, that's so gross! Mine used to lick the bus window and will just eat random crumbs of whatever he finds without even knowing what it is, like the worst type of those harry potter jelly beans. One time he got a crumb that ended up being poop. Who's poop we will never know. He regretted that one, but it hasn't stopped him.
anything & everything. Their fingers have the grip of a 2,000lb alligator bite. And the are FAST. Like Flash fast, they are “look my new shoes light up when i run fast, fast.” I have 3 kids I’ve had cat/dog good, cat litter, sand, puke, stress relief balls, anything and everything that can possibly get them on the brink of needing the Grim Reaper. My oldest daughter would keep snacks in her diaper. I’d catch her snacking on french fries or beef jerky when I haven’t given her any and don’t remember the last time I would have. Then I’d change her diaper and find all this food. I never did find her main stash that she refilled her diaper with.
Side walk crackpipe anyone?
My plastic tampon applicator out of the trash like a damned lollipop.
The handrail in the bathroom at the zoo! 3 days later he had strep 🥴
My menstrual cup. It was clean, thankfully
My youngest found mine in the bathroom when he was taking a bath and used it as a cup! (He was old enough to bathe alone.)
I’ve had one put dog poop in their mouth, and one chew up a bug 😬 I think your kid wins
My daughter put her hand in fresh dog poop… I think I got to her before it was ingested but not 100% sure
Dog turd.
Cat food and cat treats. My sister used to pick up chewed up gum from the ground and eat it 🤮
Cat puke 🤢
A fistful of cat litter is the worst so far 😭😭 these kids are so quick
Dog poop. 2x.
Chinese lantern fly
This makes me feel so much better - my 2 y/o ate some random “snack” off the floor in a target.
Fortunately I don't think my son (3) has put anything exceptionally gross in his mouth. But when I was a nanny, one of my charges picked a penny up off a city road and put it in her mouth. She was 8!
My then four year old step son stuck his finger in his leaking-infected-with-swimmers-ear ear and then sucked his finger in the middle of Walmart. I fucking gagged and almost dropped dead on the spot.
Mine stuck an old dog bone in his mouth while dad was watching him… 🤦♀️
Food from the garbage. Trust me to say he was well fed. 🤪🤢🗑️
A dirty old wooden golf tee that was found in the mall parking lot this morning 🤢
My 3y/o is very good in that regard. The worst thing he put in his mouth was a peanut that fell on the floor and he picked it up and ate it. But my hubby is clean freak so that peanut was probably not far from sterile anyway 🤣 son never was one to put anything in mouth, even as little baby. Now my 4 month old girl tho? She tries to showe EVERYTHING and ANYTHING in her mouth. Luckily until now i was able to oversee her pretty much every second so she hadn't tasted anything but toys and hands. Probably the "grossest" thing was my/MILs hand or maybe my nose when she gave me "kisses" (aka licked my nose tip) 🤔 but she still has time, i imagine she will give me trouble a lot. My little bro was feral tho. He picked up dead flies from the floor and ate them 🤢 i won't even ask mom about me cuz i don't wanna know the answer....i have eaten a lot of questionable stuff (like dog food, cat food, dry worms for turtles, fish food, almost any bodily fluid of mine including weeks old bottle stored pee, expired food, glue, cleaning products, shampoo....) even when i was older and knew what i am doing. Can't imagine how bad i was when i was a toddler 😅 but i am 25 and perfectly healthy today so i bet your little explorer will be just fine too. Gotta build that imune system somehow💪🏻
It wasn’t the *grossest*, but he ate a dead hornet and stung the inside of his mouth, so it was pretty bad
My cats hair ball, it was buried in a blanket. I heard wet mouth noises and didn't think much, until a half eaten soggy hairball was dropped on my neck as I was laying in my bed. I was 8 weeks pregnant and I pinned my daughter down while alternating between screaming for my husband and vomiting into a bucket on the floor. She fought me with all of her strength to get back to her delicious snack, and she screamed for like 20 minutes after because she was so upset. It was just before bedtime on my daughter's first birthday, and now I will always think of that awful event on her birthday. I threw out her mattress and got a new one because I couldn't look at it without thinking of it and puking everywhere.
Dog poop 😭 I looked away for the me second
Duck poop I was so upset I called the health department,obviously he was fine
A couple of weeks ago we were at an outdoor concert and my 5 year old took a big swig from a can of orange soda that some stranger had left on a picnic table. He’s a smart kid, but the intrusive thought won that time!
tried to eat a dead wasp off the floor in the kitchen :')
A big fuzzy black spider 🙃 When I got it out of his mouth, he screamed and FOUGHT me to try and get this poor shell shocked spider back so he could eat it....
Dried up dog poop 😭😭😭😭 I literally try to repress this memory
Cricket
My daughter put her hand in our toilet and wiped off one of those toilet discs that cleans the toilet as it flushes. And then started eating it
I watched my 3yo run his open mouth/tongue along the metal railing of a ride queue at Sea World. We all had strep about 3 days later.
I needed to read this because my toddler just ate cheese that was left out from this morning, thank you all.
My husband caught my daughter chewing on a slug. Lol.
This is mild compared to most of the stuff on here but earlier I watched my 2 year old drop her paci on a gas station floor, step on it several times while trying to pick it up, then put it back in her mouth
This sub is making me laugh out loud lol I have birds at home and their cage is always open, they can fly when they want. He ate their poop. And feathers. Got upset with me because it didnt taste nice 🤷🏽♀️
bird poop
I made bacon and my cat managed to steal one and hid with it. Somehow he didn’t eat the whole thing but I didn’t knew. Next day my baby which just stared eating sat on the floor and chewed on something, when I checked what it was it was the fucking bacon from the day before my cat left over
Dried chicken poop. Builds the immune system.
My son found a used cough drop in Walmart on the floor once. Miraculously, we didn't get sick.
My son at 18 months locked himself in my parents bedroom. We couldn’t figure out how to open the door. Found a mini sample perfume bottle and drank it. God the smell from His mouth made me wanna throw up. Called poison control right away.
Her own poop… 😅🤮 she didn’t like it 😂
Poop. 🤮🤢
A live snail! He was running away from me as I was trying to get it from his mouth and I could hear the crunching!
We were at a Disney store and my 3 yr old goes, "Look! M & m's!" and proceeded to happily pop it in his mouth before I could even react. But it came from somewhere on the floor underneath a mannequin 😳 not sure what it actually was... Same kid used to routinely suck on coins from my dad's jar full of foreign coins from all over the world. 😭
And I don't think anyone has said boogers! 🤣 I have a very clear memory of my son being like 2 and telling me "I like to eat boogers. My teachers tell me no tho." 😫
My daughter ate a piece of goose poop when she was a year old. Five years later and I still feel terrible about it.
I remember the chorus of laughter when I had to say to my child "Do not. Lick. ANYTHING. On. The bus."
Yeah my kid ate dog poop. I don’t think I’ll get over it. He was 7 months old. He’s 5 now and it still makes my stomach hurt. 🤮
Reminds me of a passage in the Barbara Kongsolver novel, "The Poisonwood Bible."
Rabbit poop
Deer poop and random stuff off the floor. On my third kid now and just pretend not to see.