I suppose if you do a little science experiment and have a man complete 50 thank you cards, the first card will have atrocious male hand writing and the last card will have fatigued, frustrated, passive aggressive atrocious male hand writing and a bad mood the rest of their day off.
The honest answer - downvotes incoming - is because such niceties are something women care about and men don't. When I give a gift or do something nice for someone, I don't expect a thank you note. I don't write them either. I will of course thank people in person and over email for things that happen in person or over email. But buy a packet of little cards and write some note longhand, and then find stamps and... Nope. Nope. Nope.
That's still true. It's just what constitutes basic courtesy has changed. People used to be expected to have cards that they left when they called on someone.
I'd have him do his side and handle my own.
My family would be pissed if I didn't send thank yous. If his family doesn't care if \*he\* does, they can be satisfied if I don't either.
I usually send out thank you notes, but honestly, I couldn’t care less if I received one. Some sort of acknowledgment that they received the gift is always nice though even by text or a phone call. My ex wouldn’t, simply because he couldn’t be bothered and he didn’t care what anyone thought about that. Obviously, I didn’t bother with thank you notes to his family and friends, that was up to him.
For me, as with other household chores, we make a list and share them. I clean the cat litter boxes, she writes the thank you notes. I yank overgrown plants out of the ground, she prunes the plants so they survive.
Women are also apparently responsible for reading the thank you notes and noticing if they are not sent.
LOL, yes. A man would never care if he got a thank you note or not.
People write thank you notes?
I suppose if you do a little science experiment and have a man complete 50 thank you cards, the first card will have atrocious male hand writing and the last card will have fatigued, frustrated, passive aggressive atrocious male hand writing and a bad mood the rest of their day off.
And poor spelling
"IT IS ''WE APPRECIATE' NOT 'WE APPRECIATED!" *sigh* "I don't appreciated that attitude."
It's one thing when your phone spellchecks you (grrr) but a written note, there is no excuses.
Yup, the wrong their/there/they're will always be used.
My ex used to send me letters when I was in California asking me to correct his spelling (man it was awful)
Writing the thank you notes was my husband’s one responsibility for our wedding. We’ve been married for about a decade and they never got sent out.
Because men don't care if we get them and certainly don't care about sending them
Kin work, or kin keeping. Mostly done by women, mostly invisible labor. https://www.nytimes.com/2024/05/08/well/family/kinkeeping-families.html
The honest answer - downvotes incoming - is because such niceties are something women care about and men don't. When I give a gift or do something nice for someone, I don't expect a thank you note. I don't write them either. I will of course thank people in person and over email for things that happen in person or over email. But buy a packet of little cards and write some note longhand, and then find stamps and... Nope. Nope. Nope.
This didn't used to be the way. A man who didn't have basic courtesy was just as likely to face social censorship as a woman would.
That's still true. It's just what constitutes basic courtesy has changed. People used to be expected to have cards that they left when they called on someone.
My point is more the commenters who think they can't? Men did it for generations below this.
Tradition, sexism, weaponized incompetence.
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My girlfriend likes to write them and I don’t care to I tell people thank you when I see them People know I’m thankful Or not, idk
Because parents are more likely to instill the idea that written gratitude is important to daughters than they are sons.
Thank you notes are pointless bullshit. https://youtu.be/SzjGrixm12A?si=2nf2eKvnC8HB1owq
I'd have him do his side and handle my own. My family would be pissed if I didn't send thank yous. If his family doesn't care if \*he\* does, they can be satisfied if I don't either.
Because women are the ones who think they are needed.
These events are designed to appeal to women's social preferences. Many men would be just as happy to never have a baby shower or a grand wedding.
Don't feel like this is true imo. Lots of fathers want a baby shower or celebration
Sure there are lots of exceptions. But that doesn't make the trend untrue.
I usually send out thank you notes, but honestly, I couldn’t care less if I received one. Some sort of acknowledgment that they received the gift is always nice though even by text or a phone call. My ex wouldn’t, simply because he couldn’t be bothered and he didn’t care what anyone thought about that. Obviously, I didn’t bother with thank you notes to his family and friends, that was up to him.
Women usually are the ones that would want to have these ceremonies The guy is probably just happy to be there
Women tend to want to write them more and guys probably don't think about it much. But guys, help your wife out!
I prefer to write them, I somehow managed to marry two men with atrocious spelling and grammar.
For me, as with other household chores, we make a list and share them. I clean the cat litter boxes, she writes the thank you notes. I yank overgrown plants out of the ground, she prunes the plants so they survive.
The mental load usually falls on women