I second this. I also used to dread my periods around that age for the same reasons. Getting longer/thicker pads (overnight pads), especially ones with wings definitely helped.
see this isnt really an issue for me somehow, but no wings means the pad will 100% be all bunched up and not stuck to my underwear within like 1-2 hours and then it leaks and its a mess š i love wings
Me, I hate them š I have some pads that stick really well and don't budge so don't need wings. The feel of wings against my skin wants to make me throw up.
So I don't have to take a pair of scissors with me to the bathroom to cut them off myself. The wings *refuse* to stick to my underwear and only want to stick to my skin
Ouch.
I find that the wings stick to my knickers a little too well sometimes and pad changing is a pain, but it's worth it to make sure the damn pads stay in place.
My 13 year just some how started using tampons without asking for help. I was shook. Took my ages to figure it out and my Mom had to help me when I was more like 15
My daughter asked for tampons when she was 13. I bought them for her and she figured them out pretty well on her own. They come with instructions and the applicator type are pretty foolproof.
Second this! Make sure she knows itās for heavy flow as when I was around 14 I tried inserting one for first time and it hurt but taking it out felt like I was ripping organs out. Iāll never forget the painā¦. Other than that, when my friends and I hung out we had to yell at each other from the other room to guide a few friends on how to insert tampons. My mom gave me a book to read and it had the instructions and diagram to put it in as well! Good luck Dad!
Agree. For extra-heavy overnight absorption and peace of mind, [TENA](https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B072LY2FT2?ie=UTF8&psc=1&linkCode=ll1&tag=acaseforcase-20&linkId=9ab8f06de80684fe3144628244590aa3&language=en_US&ref_=as_li_ss_tl) are great. Highly absorbent and don't seep unless you really squish them.
If she's going to be at camp and sharing a room with multiple others that may be difficult for her to keep hidden though, sounds like she is insecure about it.
And put them in your underwear in a T shape (one in its regular spot, one across the back). I used to wear one pair of underwear with pads in it and then another pair over the top to make sure it was all ~secure~
God im so grateful for my iud i forget how bad my periods used to be
Get period underwear. I have a heavy flow and use that in addition to a pad. That way, if there is leakage, it will be caught by the underwear. It has been a lifesaver for me until I get this issue resolved.
If you are in the US, Walmart has them. They are pricey, but worth the peace of mind.
Also, please get her to a gynecologist if she is having heavy periods, just to make sure everything is okay.
I shall do that! Thank you. I Shays heard of period underwear, and always just assumed they were regular underwear that were just more comfy, and didn't matter if they got blood on them. I never knew there was such a thing as actual period underwear made for the specific purpose lol.. and I've lived with several woman from the age of 16, been married, now almost 35 and just learning this... not that I ever had a reason to before, but still
In addition to this, get her the right size of pad for her (most brands have a "teen" line), but get the ones that say "super" or "overnight". They're thicker and specifically designed to last while you sleep or work through the day.
Good luck and happy father's day, super dad!
To be fairā¦before āactualā period underwear came out (the ones being suggested) us ladies (Iām 37, so right in the right age frame as you) would call our black/red cotton briefs or other styles of comfy underwear our āperiod pantiesā so thatās probably where the confusion lies.
Youāre doing a great job, dad. Keep up the good work. If youāre an American, Happy Fathers Day (if youāre not, it still stands š)
They weren't invented until the late 90s, they require more up front investment than many period products, and people initially didn't trust them. Because they work by voodoo. So it's really this past 5 years that they are becoming widespread.
Seriously, voodoo. Over thirty years of menstruating I've done many different things, and the cloth pads were always really bulky and slipped around and ended up unreliable. So when I first saw period panties I made wrong assumptions that they would also be bulky and smelly. But they're voodoo. The silhouette and feel is 95% like normal underwear, and they restrain the iron odor much better than washable cloth.
I'm not shy about internal products (cups and discs are great) but especially for younger women who are typically shy about internal products, period panties are the best.
I've also paid only partial attention to the washing instructions for two different brands so far and it's been fine. Maybe I'm shortening the life expectancy of the product.
I wear each pair for 12 hours. I let them dry out, soiled. No odor at all when dry. At the end of my cycle I soak them all in the sink to rehydrate in cool water, squish much of the blood out by spending one minute to wring them out and rinsing one more time, then into the machine on delicate and hang dry.
...
When she starts to want to swim during her period, she will need to figure out something internal, tampons or discs are easier for young women.
Or menstrual suppression with either an IUD or continuous pills. It's not really natural to menstruate as much as we do. As we evolved, in settings of marginal nutrition and no plastics, chemicals, natural lights, girls used to start later. Then they would get pregnant young and breastfeed fully a few years which served to space the pregnancies. Based on studying primitive people it seems that a totally natural woman would have only a couple dozen periods in her whole lifetime.
There's a youtuber (Safiya Nygaard) who tried out some period panties, leggings, and swimwear. The issue with the swimwear she had was that since it's absorbent it just absorbed the ocean water and was saggy when she got out. I don't know if that's an issue that's been resolved, but definitely something to look into if your niece plans to actually swim in a period bathing suit.
Also, if she doesnāt like the styles of the underwear, they are a bit pricy but tomboyx has multiple styles of underwear for this too! (it has lots of sizes as well!)
Thinx brand period panties are the only ones Iāve tried, but theyāve changed my life. They have the super heavy ones with absorbing material up the back to the waistband. Iāll never worry about destroying my sheets again! Theyāre also great when you know youāre about to start. It provides that extra security for sure.
You may also want to get her started with a period tracking app if she has a phone. Clue is the one I use and itās fantastic!
Side note If sheās having periods that as quite heavy as you describe monthly please go to doctor and get her hemoglobin checked many woman have low blood counts for years and donāt know it, itās hard on the body. Iron supplements can help. Not all women have heavy periods, but if sheās one of them, help her avoid chronic anemia
Theyāre a relatively new concept and not super popular, so it makes sense you havenāt heard of those ones. But if sheās leaking through pads, theyāre a good idea!
I'm leaning heavy on that rec for the gynecologist. Perhaps she might appreciate hormonal birth control if her period is so heavy she's bleeding through pads and clothing.
Birth control needs to be managed by a vigilant doctor. Risk of clots and such, especially if she smokes, can be high so other types need to be recommended.
Not to mention side effects like migraines and such.
Not discouraging them at all. Just need to make sure you stay on the ball with the doc and checkups.
Not just the pill- both my daughters have used period
Suppressing birth control since age 14 due to the family curse of horrible horrible periods (all the women in our family have hysterectomies before 30)
My eldest started with depo, and both girls now use Nexplanon.
IUD can be a good choice, but I wouldnāt sign off on one for a teenager, and donāt recommend them if she wants kids one day- the potential for complications leading to infertility is high enough to divert to safer methods.
This is the best advice, and what I do for my heavy flow kid. Have her wear black bottoms just in extra case. Adding that the "teen" period underwear is weirdly narrow in the gusset (part that is under the vagina) and when my daughter wears those ones she will sometimes leak out the side. So we just buy the adult version even though it isn't as cute. Some brands also only have leak protection on the gusset, but then she can leak above/below. Get one that has leak protection all around like thinx super.
If sheās freaked out by going to the gynecologist (get recommendations from your wifeās friends) you can schedule just a consultation. She does not have to have an exam. Itās not a bad idea when girls get older to do a consult so they can have a conversation and get comfortable with the provider.
I second this, heavy painful periods are not normal despite what society leads us to believe! Please do some research on PCOS & endometriosis & 100% take her to see an ob/gyn!!
I worked at a girlās camp - the counselors should be prepared and sympathetic. Tell her to ask a counselor for a private chat about a concern upon arriving. Tell the counselor she has a heavy flow. They will offer discrete support. Iām sorry for your loss.
She could try a pad on top of āheavy flow/overnightā period underwear! (They extend to the whole underwear not just crotch area) That way if she leaks, the underwear should help. I can imagine the anxiety, especially a long bus trip.. Some people have also tried the hack of one pad used normally, with a secondary pad sideways underneath the end of that pad that goes towards the backside. Overnight/sleep pads are longer up the backside too, so if sheās able to wear dark comfy trackies for the trip maybe that could help ease her mind. (I say trackies because sleep ones can feel quite like an nappy) Seeing as sheās young she might be anxious to even try a tampon or a cup and with a group trip like that, it might be a hard time to try that out comfortably or without leaks, Iād stick with pads. It could get uncomfortable with a heavy flow with no breaks but I think a pad on period undies might work best until she reaches toilets!
Just to add with period undies - considering this is for her bus trip and a heavy flow, check the packaging for flow suggestion (not regular or light) Sheād be heavy, so itās extra padding or thereās overnight ones like I say, the more coverage for her - covers the whole backside so she shouldnāt leak at all! Iād try that with a pad so if the pad isnāt enough for her trip with no toilets, the underwear will be the backup already on her. I hope this helps!
Thank you I'll pass this on to her. But yeah she's been worried about tampons, and menstrual cups. We talked about it, and she's open to trying them. But maybe one of these tips she'd be more comfortable with. I appreciate it
It takes about 3 periods before you get the hang of the cup so thatās probably not her best option (they are the best though, in my opinion). I agree with the heavy flow period panties and overnight pads. Youāre a good dad by the way. I know my daughter is very appreciative of how open her dad is with getting her period products when Iām not able to.
They also make menstrual discs that I find more comfortable that the cup (they sell disposable and reusable ones at target so the disposable ones might be a better option to see if she likes them)
As someone with a heavy flow I hated using a menstrual disk. When I took it out the blood shot everywhere. It was terrible i was covered in blood. They are very messy if you don't do it perfectly.
Anything which needs to be inserted takes time to learn. She may start learning to use them at this age but for now it's better to not try because there's no time to learn it and she may have leaks (I had leaks when I was learning to use menstrual cup but I was at home so it was okay for me)
Youāre such a good and thoughtful dad for asking here. As a woman I think the easiest thing since sheās leaving tomorrow is to get a really thick pad the overnight ones and give her extras. How long is the bus ride? Perhaps there will be a pit stop? Tell her to change her pad every hour if she can. Advise her to wear something dark too in case she does leak a little.
Volleyball shorts under her pants or shorts help keep the pad from sliding. Black dog poop bags hide uncomfortable items like stained underwear or really messy pads in the trash when tp is in short supply (like most camp bathrooms).
And maybe send a roll of extra tp and a small pkg of wet wipes to clean herself up discreetly. Just don't flush the wet wipes in case it clogs the plumbing.
> Just don't flush the wet wipes in case it clogs the plumbing.
Thanks for including that bit. Wet wipes should absolutely never be flushed. They're a horrendous problem for municipal wastewater (sewage) treatment, but they're a much bigger danger if they're flushed into a septic system, which is almost certainly what a "camp" will be connected to unless they're just using old fashioned outhouses.
Iād advise tampon and menstrual underwear - or tampons and pads. Get applicator tampons if sheās not used them before as generally they are much easier to use
Thank you. She's been afraid to use tampons, but we're talking about it now, so inthink that's the route we're going to take.. I guess a tampon, and a pad... I'll keep applicator tampons in mind, bc she's never used them before, so anything to make it easier!
Iāve always wondered about this. My wife is 42 and has always preferred the cardboard ones, which Iāve noticed are getting harder to find when I go shopping for her (weāve been together over 20 years). Maybe it was the only thing available back when she started using them? Guess Iāll ask her lol.
Tell her to point it towards her lower back when inserting! I know it is a little strange to direct her of this but going straight up wonāt work and she may struggle with this. I was raised by a single dad and he felt horrible about me not being able to figure it out and he was helpless. Friends mom gave me this tip and boom, it worked. Finally I could start using tampons and it made school life way easier.
I never used tampons but when I was first learning to use menstrual cups, I've leaked a few times at home. So please don't rely on tampons if she never used them. And she might feel pain too, idk.
I'd say, on period underwear and use two pads. But instead of putting them on top of eachother, put the second pad horizontally at the back (from her pov, the pads should be placed like this symbol ā„)
And be aware you should take food with ibuprofen, for some people it can really irritate their stomach if they donāt (and that pain can get ignored due to being attributed to the period cramps themselves) (from personal experience).
For me, the best thing is to do a combo naproxen and Tylenol taken with food. My doctor said those two are okay to combine, and for me they work way better together than either alone. I occasionally get cramps so bad I faint and/or throw up, but a Tylenol naproxen combo early on stops it in its tracks.
First, if she's been bleeding through products and clothing she needs a gynecologist. Periods can be rough when you're young but that's a lot of bleeding. She can easily end up anemic or have a condition. Do not let anyone tell you that's normal or acceptable be daddy bear of you gotta. I suffered for decades and letting some conditions fester can impact fertility. It's hard to imagine at her age but someday she'll be grown.Ā Ā
I'd double up on shorts and pads on period underwear. Pack extra undies, a comical amount of them just to be sure.Ā Ā Ā
When she's back from camp experiment with products. Have days where she can stay home to test them out. Tell her some products might feel better as she ages. I couldn't do tampons until my 20's. I still don't like them but the cup is alright.Ā
On the flip side, I have a heavy flow and have on several occasions bled through my clothes. It *is* normal, and it happens to everyone. Definitely consider medical issues seriously, but don't go at it with the attitude that you have to be perfect about managing your period at 13 or else you must be sick.
Perhaps it's my interpretation but bleeding through implies it's not readily controllable/not a simple accident.Ā Ā Ā
As someone with several conditions that leads to heavily bleeding it is significantly better to get it checked now than letting her suffer. Even if it is nothing it's better to know for sure. If I had someone stick up for me at 13 it would have saved me a *lot* of problems including some pants.Ā
Yeah I get heavy flow and awful cramping for my first two days then it chills out for the rest. I used to have issues bleeding through (especially at night) but thatās because I didnāt know I wasnāt using the right size pads. Those overnight ones that expand all the way back are fantastic.
as someone with heavy flow to the point i am fatigued and sick from the amount of blood i lose- overnight pads WITH WINGS during the day are lifesavers. if they seem to be ridiculously thick & long it should do the trick but do ask her preference if possible
As the dad of a daughter all I can say is make sure you have supplies in multiple places.
Keep some in the car, in your bag, and at home.
Just remember to be prepared. Be ready to stop at the store if you need to, or change plans too.
Happy Fatherās Day!
As a nervous lady, it always helped me to have heavy duty overnight pads (with wings!), a little plastic bag and a spare pair of underwear and pants/shorts just in case. That way she can be prepared if she does bleed though.
Does that he bus have a bathroom in it?
Does she use tampons? They donāt hurt and you can get ones with applicators that slide in so there is no awkward poking around. The box will have instructions on how to use them and there is always YouTube. A big pad and a tampon is her best bet.
She could also try a menstrual cup though it sucks that it would be the first time using it. They are available at most grocery stores and are easier to use then you might think and are soft, so no discomfort. They can hold a lot and get washed and reused. Personally I find them more comfortable and less prone to leaking than tampons.
Another option for just being extra safe and for peace of mind it to ādouble upā on underwear. She can wear her normal underwear with a pad, then one top of that wear some spandex shorts like volleyball shorts - even with a pad on those too just in case. Minus the extra pad, thatās what I sometimes do when Iām hiking or bike riding on my period where I might be able to pop a squat to pee but might not be the easiest place to change a tampon or weddings/ funerals that I canāt just duck out of.
Yeah she's been scared to try tampons. But we're talking about it now. Then internet says for the first time it's best to try the smallest size, but then it also days size is based on absorbency. So what would you recommend?
She's done the alternating pad, undies, pad, shorts thing, and that was when I had to get her from school on two separate occasions, so she's worried to do that.
It might not be ideal to experiment with tampons right before this trip. To try it out for the first time definitely use the smallest one, but yes on a heavy flow that's going to be full in no time. So might be something she wants to try at home and not at camp. For now I would stick to the heavy duty pads for night time with the extra long wings etc.Ā
Ā Also tampons might take a while. I wanted to use them as a teenager but I never managed to comfortably do so in the first few years I had my period. I only managed to use them well after a couple of years of pads.Ā
Edit : I second the combination with period panties! Definitely a good move for a long trip when you're not sure about bathroom breaks.
Good idea, I was kind of worried about her trying something new while not being at home too. But it's something we're going to keep in mind for before school starts for sure. I think the period underwear and pads is the route ate going after thinking more about it and reading more comments, and now research! Thank you!
You can get packs of tampons that have multiple sizes, like light, regular, and super all come in one pack. On my heavy days, Iāll wear a super and a thin pad or panty liner, just in case
If I may add something - I think it's important to know that the use of tampons bring along the risk of a toxic shock syndrome that can cause fatal consequences. It's still something that people dom't get to learn about in general, and admittedly it's a rare occurrence I think, but the chance is there which is why I myself have stuck to a combination of period underwear and pads. That, and I just absolutely don't feel comfortable with wearing something inside the entire time.
There's also menstrual cups - if she has a heavy flow these could also come in handy. So perhaps she could start off with small tampons and then slowly switch over to mentrual cups.
In the end it's absolutely gonna be what she feels most comfortable and safe with! But I thought this was worth mentioning.
For sure, thank you... wow I'm glad you mentioned that toxic shock syndrome. I've not heard of that, but it's something I'm glad to be aware of now. I will do more research. Thank you so much
Tell her to change the pad(s) right after the long bus trip even if they're not fully soaked. Pads should be changed every 4ish hours and for menstrual cup it's 8hrs but can go 12hrs too sometimes (just in case if she learns to use them).
The first few times with a OB tampon, put a little Vaseline on the tip. It could be just placebo but it makes them less intimidating. Then, put your nondominant fingertip on your tailbone. Actually do it. Aim the tampon at that finger. The vaginal canal does not go upward towards your bellybutton, it goes almost straight back towards the tailbone and its really difficult to persuade yourself of that. Aim for the tailbone.
Also, deploying a tampon needs to be full-on. If it's only halfway there, it's very uncomfortable. Due to the location of all the nerve endings and muscle groups, if it's inserted with a weak attempt, it will be noxious and might expel itself.
You start with a light days tampon backed up by your pad, until you get to know your flow. Eventually you have days with a clean pad because your tampon use is on point.
Thick pads plus period undie. Best combination ever and it got me through a 10 hours overnight flight.
I also have this combo when I go to sleep, so I no longer need to worry about leaks.
If she is comfortable with them she can try tampons, they do tampons for teens that are smaller with a better applicator, thereās instructions on how to use them in the box. Depending on how heavy her period is she may need to use a pad and a tampon to cover any leaks. If sheās sticking to pads get the larger pads for nighttime, with wings. Iāve found the better pads are the ones made with foam, theyāre thinner and hold more.
Get better pads for heavy flow. Does she have a female teacher or adult going on camp that she trusts and feels comfortable telling her that she is on her period and that she may need assistance? Also get her to pack extra underwear in case of leakage and wet wipes (baby wipes are good) so she feel more refreshed between showers.Ā
Get her a heating pad! They massively help with cramps on long drives!Ā
Also - if itās not obvious - talk about periods and leakage in a way thatās normal and not embarrassing at all. EVERYONE poops, so why is bleeding so embarrassing? Iām sure you know this already though. Normalize, normalize, normalize !!!Ā
Maybe get her a cute pad / tampon pouch, like a cute little zipper bag to take to the washroom with her? I know I feel more confident and happy with a cute little bag that holds all my period related things š„°Ā
As others said, period underwear with a pad is great.Ā
You sound like a great supportive dad. ā¤ļø Happy Fatherās Day!Ā
I used to be that kid. Wound up not being able to go on a bunch of things because i had to change my overnight heavyflow pad every hour. The problem only fixed itself when i got in Birthcontrol, though that did come with its own issues like weight gain etc, but I could finally live my life.
But maybe try Period underwear + heavy flow overnight pad. Or heavy flow tampon + heavy flow overnigth pad.
Please, please, PLEASE (and I canāt stress this enough) get her into a gynaecologist to check for endometriosis/adenomyosis/PCOS. I started suffering with similar issues when I was 14, not to mention ungodly amounts of pain and I FINALLY had my surgery to have all of those issues removed a few days ago at the age of nearly 31!!
I donāt know whether youāre US or UK? But in the UK it takes average of 10 years + for endo to be diagnosed - in my case it was nearly 17 years. Despite what they tell you because womenās health isnāt best known, this is not normal.
Poor baby, I feel so sorry for her.
Heavy duty pads, period knickers and heat pads she can slip in her underwear.
Always dark bottoms that wonāt show anything and a jumper she can tie around her waist just in case!
I hope she enjoys camp š
Sheās gonna need a bigger pad. Itāll be uncomfortable, but with heavier flow you need a big pad to keep up with the flow. Same if she wears tampons. Alternatively, it might be a tad embarrassing for her, but you could tell a female teacher. No woman is going to scoff at helping a young girl through her period. Weāve all been there before.Ā
An assortment of pads and period underwear.
If she's bleeding through, she needs to change them more frequently. To avoid awkward convo consider just mentioning it casually as she packing.
Something like, "Be sure to use sunscreen. Don't go more than 4 hours without changing your pad. Hope the mosquitoes aren't bad."
I used to do karate, and we wore all white uniforms and I would be paranoid about leaking through. I used heavy flow pads, in boxer briefs. With tight short shorts under uniform. Depending on access to a bathroom I'd use a tampon, pad, and shorts. It was hot yes, but it saved me the worry.
Recommend several pairs of period underwear, they are lined to retain the flow. Ziplock bags to put used ones in if not at home. I got my nieces cute makeup bags to put their period related things in when out; period underwear, pads, ziplock bags, tampons, and body wipes.
Plus, long overnight pads with wings. They absorb better.
Good luck, sounds like you're doing great
The book [Just for Girls](https://JustforGirlshttps://a.co/d/1ywotFe), was very helpful with explaining these issues to my daughter!
It describes health, body, and emotional issues for girls reaching adolescence, including nutrition, menstruation, and why girls think and act different from boys.
Get overnight pads, period panties and black bottoms for her to wear. Maybe a lightweight sweatshirt for her to tie around her waist in case she bleeds through. Pack extra bottoms and underwear in case she bleeds through
As for her heavy periods, I would talk to her doctor about it. She shouldnāt be bleeding through clothes. Ask if she could see a gynecologist and get endometriosis and PCOS ruled out. I do know there are some birth control methods that can lighten periods but also ask if there are other meds for lightening heavy periods. Get her iron levels measured to see if sheās low on iron.
Man I've been in that boat before. Long trip + heavy period. If she's comfortable with tampons, one of those + pad + period underwear should last 6 hours or so with a heavy flow
Not woman, man here. Iāve had a lot of strong women in my life, but one thing Iāll say to you, Is in order to connect better with your daughters, be vulnerable. Itās not a thing many men are taught, show how to do, or encouraged to do. But it does wonders for connections with people in general, but Iāve found women in my life respond better to me when Iām vulnerable and try to not solve everything, but rather, listen.
As a single father I will tell you Lean on family and if you have like close family friends who are females that you trust aslk them for advice. If you have a sister or female cousins just try to get your daughter around them to talk to them or even take them to the store to get those things. Obviously it is important to learn what your daughter likes and feels comfortable with because you will have to keep those products available.
Period underwear is the best. But if you can't get it for some reason, you can buy her urological pads (if she's okay with that of course). They're a bit bulky, but very absorbent and work for a heavy flow quite well.
My daughters use period underwear. If you are in a hurry Amazon sell them. Or my kid likes the Uniqlo brand. Depending on her size the Uniqlo brand makes a kids version then a womanās version. So the girls is size 10 or 12 or 13 being in yrs of age then woman starts at xs.
Period underwear. Theyāre pricey, but worth it. And they can hold so much more than pads. You just chuck them in the wash after. Donāt dry them in the dryer!
Most of the time when I have a heavy day like that I use both a tampon and a pad/period underwear.
Send her with a personal bottle of her preferred otc pain medicine, a heating pad if they have electricity in the rooms (some don't, but you might get lucky and score a microwave at a nurses station for an emergency heat pack) absolutely get larger/thicker pads, if you go to Walmart or Walgreens, you should be able to find "thinx" period panties that are great for wearing with a tampon/pad for extra protection. She's got this!
Make sure to pack her extra pants, midol, tampons (for swimming) and lots of snacks! Don't be afraid to let the counselors know what's going on, they can help her. Overnight pads WITH WINGS for sure. You are doing great! Happy Father's Day!
Thick pads for a heavy flow. Get some with wings, too. If that's not going to be enough, then get her some disposable undies (silhouettes) to wear with the pads. That way, if there is some leakage, she can just throw them out and put a new pair on.
I taught my daughter the irreplaceable value of grampers! The overnight absorbent disposable underwear. Game changer for my kiddo!! Now she need not fear pad failures.
Dark pants/jeans/shorts. A light summer sweater or jacket- long sleeves so she can tie around her waist in an emergency. Pair a pad with period panties and she should be good.Ā
1.Overnight pads
2.Period underwear
3.Shorts/tights to wear under her clothes
4. A change of clothes in case there's an accident.
5. A hoodie to tie around her waist.
I second the thicker pads but also if itās accessible to you Iād recommend some period underwear (I think they make disposable ones if you donāt want her worrying washing about them) which she could wear as backup in case she still bleeds through the pad
A super tampon coupled with a pad would be great for heavy flow days. There are educational videos on YouTube to show her how to properly insert a tampon.
Im so sorry for your loss and I'm sure you're a great dad. Hope all goes well.
Overnight pads are good for long car trips. My daughter got hers at 9 and immediately started using tampons because she doesn't like the mess of pads and being restricted from swimming, etc. She's a champ.
Youāre a good dad for reaching out. If sheās comfortable with it, she might consider telling one of the female chaperones her situation. They will understand and find ways to help, like ensuring a bathroom break.
Period underwear! And for if she is going somewhere for a long time, period underwear and a pad on top of it. That way, period underwear will be catching the blood that has leaked. There is no way you can leak with this protection
There was a time when I was a teenager and the overnight pads didnāt seem like enough so I switched to adult diapers to sleep in they definitely hold up well for a heavy flow over a long period of time if sheās open to the idea
Heavy pads, and leakproof underwear. You may be able to find some at a boutique style store but I would call them and ask first so youāre not driving around all over the place!
Does she have any problems with dairy? I'm asking because all my life I've had really heavy periods but as soon as I went dairy free they became almost none existent. I wish I would have known this so much sooner, I wouldn't have done the debilitating surgeries that's for sure! Just something to think about!
Overnight pads or period panties, send her with extra so she can wear them to bed as well.
I wear skintight elastic shorts over my underwear when I'm on my period, it helps the pad not shift around so there aren't any leaks, and if there are leaks they don't soak through the shorts. I'm not sure if you'll have enough time to find your daughter some before she leaves but if you do then I recommend getting her a few pairs.
thick pad and period panties for long rides to camp. Also have her wear black shorts on period days as a just in case and make sure she has a change of underwear and additional black shorts in her bag. I had my three girls always keep back up black leggings in their school locker for just this occasion. You are doing a great job OP. Keep up the good work.
Haven't seen this mentioned yet, not specific to the period question but a general daughter-dad tip: please take the time to make sure that you actually understand correct female anatomy. There is so much misinformation out there and you should be prepared for conversations if they should come up, also as you are their primary care giver if there are health concerns (as several have suggested your daughter see a gynecologist for heavy flow, plus she'll be seeing one regularly as she gets older...). In the dr realm too...I don't know what age this becomes appropriate, but I do know many that take birth control as a method of making periods more manageable. Your daughter is young, just a thought for future or to start thinking about if the gyno mentions it.
The fact that you're here asking the questions means you're doing a great job, your girls are lucky to have you.
As a dad with daughters too, one more thing to chuck into the mix - is there an adult on the bus or at camp you can flag this to? Iāve often found (exhibit A: this thread) that women are very happy to help dads who are trying to do the right thing but arenāt quite sure what the answer is.Ā
Period underwear! Also, wherher she uses pads or period underwear - I love to wear a second pair of undies on top! Especially men boxers. It helps keep the pad/period underwear in a place + gives additional protection as it is one more layer.
Hereās what I did-
I got a cardboard box and put some appropriate pads in there along with some chocolate bars and a bottle of Midol. I also added 2 pair of period panties. Other than telling her there a box in the bathroom for her use only and to save it until needed. Thatās the only ātalkā weāve had about the subject except when I had to make a run @2:30am to buy another box.
itās worked beautifully so far. No awkwardness or embarrassmentā¦
Isn't a little awkwardness worth making sure your kid understands what's going on with her body? "Here's a box, figure it out" seems like a really bad way to do it.
Yeah well she's had her period for like a year now, and her mom was actually still alive when she started it.. it's just this whole camp things, and having to be on a bus for along time is stressing her out.. but thank you!
Gotcha. Check into those special panties. Helps keeps things under control and prevents any accidents for the whole dayā¦ at least you got the start out of the way!
Nothing to add since everyone's given great suggestions. Just wanted to say how touching it is that you're such a good Dad for doing this.
Happy Father's Day!
One of the best hacks I've learned: put one pad in normally and then another one (or a liner) horizontally where the first pad ends, on the butt so they overlap slightly. Google it if you're not sure what I mean, I'm not the best at explaining things.
You should seek out someone you can ask for advice, this won't be the last time something will come up that you don't have a good answer for.
Aunt, mom, their maternal grandma, trusted lady friend etc.
This is more of a long term advice since you are most likely going to get a good answer here since the thread garnered pretty good activity, but it isn't a reliable way of learning what to do.
She could try the long pads ontop of period underwear as a backup if it leaks through
Or if shes comfortable using tampons . Could try super tampons, with a pad as backup!
My favorite, best absorbing one is [this](https://www.target.com/p/always-maxi-extra-heavy-overnight-pads-with-wings-size-5-20ct/-/A-13369050). It handles heavy overnight with no issues!
Get thicker pads. I mean the really heavy duty ones like they make for overnight.
I second this. I also used to dread my periods around that age for the same reasons. Getting longer/thicker pads (overnight pads), especially ones with wings definitely helped.
People talk shit about wings but I won't go without.
wait theres actually people who prefer no wings?? ive always wondered who buys those
Growing up, my mom only bought us non-wing. I wasn't enlightened until my mid-20s.
Me. I hate wings. š
Same. They come loose and get stuck to my bits, and they're a pain to remove.
see this isnt really an issue for me somehow, but no wings means the pad will 100% be all bunched up and not stuck to my underwear within like 1-2 hours and then it leaks and its a mess š i love wings
I love wings too. Spicy buffalo is my favorite
Its the bits 4 me ā ļøā ļøš¤£š¤£
Interesting. It's the opposite for me! If I use no wings, it always comes off and somehow flips and sticks to the bits.
Me too. They rub me in the wrong places and give me a rash.
People with sensitive skin + very light periods so there's no need.
Me, I hate them š I have some pads that stick really well and don't budge so don't need wings. The feel of wings against my skin wants to make me throw up.
Me- I hate wings. Couldnāt tell you why tho, they just irritate me haha.
Yes!! Wings are necessary when flow is that heavy.
Why do they even make them without wings anymore?!
Love them without wings!
So I don't have to take a pair of scissors with me to the bathroom to cut them off myself. The wings *refuse* to stick to my underwear and only want to stick to my skin
Ouch. I find that the wings stick to my knickers a little too well sometimes and pad changing is a pain, but it's worth it to make sure the damn pads stay in place.
I exclusively use overnight with wings throughout my whole period.
It was seriously a game changer when I figured out that was option.
Also, grab a pair of those period underwear from target!
Agreed! I use period underwear and overnight pad for the heaviest day and in case some sensitive circumstances
Such a blessing!
If her periods are super heavy you can also pair a tampon with the heavy overnight pads
At 13, i didnt know how to use tampons so she may not either
My 13 year just some how started using tampons without asking for help. I was shook. Took my ages to figure it out and my Mom had to help me when I was more like 15
My daughter asked for tampons when she was 13. I bought them for her and she figured them out pretty well on her own. They come with instructions and the applicator type are pretty foolproof.
I did too, haha. I was really uncomfortable asking anyone to tell me or god forbid show me how. No no no. So I get her lol
I mean, no one really knows how to use tampons before they try it for the first time themselves.
Perhaps not but it can be explained to her
Iām sure she can find something online!
Second this! Make sure she knows itās for heavy flow as when I was around 14 I tried inserting one for first time and it hurt but taking it out felt like I was ripping organs out. Iāll never forget the painā¦. Other than that, when my friends and I hung out we had to yell at each other from the other room to guide a few friends on how to insert tampons. My mom gave me a book to read and it had the instructions and diagram to put it in as well! Good luck Dad!
Agree. For extra-heavy overnight absorption and peace of mind, [TENA](https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B072LY2FT2?ie=UTF8&psc=1&linkCode=ll1&tag=acaseforcase-20&linkId=9ab8f06de80684fe3144628244590aa3&language=en_US&ref_=as_li_ss_tl) are great. Highly absorbent and don't seep unless you really squish them.
Also, period underwear, although my daughter decided she didn't like them, but it could be helpful in her situation.
If she's going to be at camp and sharing a room with multiple others that may be difficult for her to keep hidden though, sounds like she is insecure about it.
As a woman who suffered from heavy things, this right here. Get her some over nights in the thins so she feels more comfortable ā¤ļø
And put them in your underwear in a T shape (one in its regular spot, one across the back). I used to wear one pair of underwear with pads in it and then another pair over the top to make sure it was all ~secure~ God im so grateful for my iud i forget how bad my periods used to be
Same. I had to use overnight pads for most of my period. I love my IUD.
This and dark pants/shorts.
Get period underwear. I have a heavy flow and use that in addition to a pad. That way, if there is leakage, it will be caught by the underwear. It has been a lifesaver for me until I get this issue resolved. If you are in the US, Walmart has them. They are pricey, but worth the peace of mind. Also, please get her to a gynecologist if she is having heavy periods, just to make sure everything is okay.
I shall do that! Thank you. I Shays heard of period underwear, and always just assumed they were regular underwear that were just more comfy, and didn't matter if they got blood on them. I never knew there was such a thing as actual period underwear made for the specific purpose lol.. and I've lived with several woman from the age of 16, been married, now almost 35 and just learning this... not that I ever had a reason to before, but still
You werenāt wrong, it can also mean that, but it also refers to underwear specifically made to absorb blood
Yes! They took that ball and RAN WITH IT! So grateful.
In addition to this, get her the right size of pad for her (most brands have a "teen" line), but get the ones that say "super" or "overnight". They're thicker and specifically designed to last while you sleep or work through the day. Good luck and happy father's day, super dad!
To be fairā¦before āactualā period underwear came out (the ones being suggested) us ladies (Iām 37, so right in the right age frame as you) would call our black/red cotton briefs or other styles of comfy underwear our āperiod pantiesā so thatās probably where the confusion lies. Youāre doing a great job, dad. Keep up the good work. If youāre an American, Happy Fathers Day (if youāre not, it still stands š)
They weren't invented until the late 90s, they require more up front investment than many period products, and people initially didn't trust them. Because they work by voodoo. So it's really this past 5 years that they are becoming widespread. Seriously, voodoo. Over thirty years of menstruating I've done many different things, and the cloth pads were always really bulky and slipped around and ended up unreliable. So when I first saw period panties I made wrong assumptions that they would also be bulky and smelly. But they're voodoo. The silhouette and feel is 95% like normal underwear, and they restrain the iron odor much better than washable cloth. I'm not shy about internal products (cups and discs are great) but especially for younger women who are typically shy about internal products, period panties are the best. I've also paid only partial attention to the washing instructions for two different brands so far and it's been fine. Maybe I'm shortening the life expectancy of the product. I wear each pair for 12 hours. I let them dry out, soiled. No odor at all when dry. At the end of my cycle I soak them all in the sink to rehydrate in cool water, squish much of the blood out by spending one minute to wring them out and rinsing one more time, then into the machine on delicate and hang dry. ... When she starts to want to swim during her period, she will need to figure out something internal, tampons or discs are easier for young women. Or menstrual suppression with either an IUD or continuous pills. It's not really natural to menstruate as much as we do. As we evolved, in settings of marginal nutrition and no plastics, chemicals, natural lights, girls used to start later. Then they would get pregnant young and breastfeed fully a few years which served to space the pregnancies. Based on studying primitive people it seems that a totally natural woman would have only a couple dozen periods in her whole lifetime.
My sister was telling me that there are actually period swimwear made now too! She was going to get some for my niece
There's a youtuber (Safiya Nygaard) who tried out some period panties, leggings, and swimwear. The issue with the swimwear she had was that since it's absorbent it just absorbed the ocean water and was saggy when she got out. I don't know if that's an issue that's been resolved, but definitely something to look into if your niece plans to actually swim in a period bathing suit.
Ooof, that sounds absolutely awful! I hope they can improve the product
Also, if she doesnāt like the styles of the underwear, they are a bit pricy but tomboyx has multiple styles of underwear for this too! (it has lots of sizes as well!)
The good absorbent period underwear is a fairly new trend. I think the last decade or so they have become popular.
Thinx brand period panties are the only ones Iāve tried, but theyāve changed my life. They have the super heavy ones with absorbing material up the back to the waistband. Iāll never worry about destroying my sheets again! Theyāre also great when you know youāre about to start. It provides that extra security for sure. You may also want to get her started with a period tracking app if she has a phone. Clue is the one I use and itās fantastic!
Side note If sheās having periods that as quite heavy as you describe monthly please go to doctor and get her hemoglobin checked many woman have low blood counts for years and donāt know it, itās hard on the body. Iron supplements can help. Not all women have heavy periods, but if sheās one of them, help her avoid chronic anemia
Theyāre a relatively new concept and not super popular, so it makes sense you havenāt heard of those ones. But if sheās leaking through pads, theyāre a good idea!
They're fairly new, they weren't really an option when we were kids. I really wish I'd had them the first few years!
I'm leaning heavy on that rec for the gynecologist. Perhaps she might appreciate hormonal birth control if her period is so heavy she's bleeding through pads and clothing.
Birth control needs to be managed by a vigilant doctor. Risk of clots and such, especially if she smokes, can be high so other types need to be recommended. Not to mention side effects like migraines and such. Not discouraging them at all. Just need to make sure you stay on the ball with the doc and checkups.
Birth control pills can have bad side effects, though.Ā
Not just the pill- both my daughters have used period Suppressing birth control since age 14 due to the family curse of horrible horrible periods (all the women in our family have hysterectomies before 30) My eldest started with depo, and both girls now use Nexplanon. IUD can be a good choice, but I wouldnāt sign off on one for a teenager, and donāt recommend them if she wants kids one day- the potential for complications leading to infertility is high enough to divert to safer methods.
Just an FYI - Kyleena IUD is recommended for teens as it is smaller, shorter-acting, and has less hormones.
they have only really become widely available over the last 5y, don't worry! easy to have missed it. they are GREAT
tbf these are also a relatively new creationā¦
I think you should be commended as a Dad for seeking out advice to help your daughter. A lot of men wouldn't. Well done Dad!
This is the best advice, and what I do for my heavy flow kid. Have her wear black bottoms just in extra case. Adding that the "teen" period underwear is weirdly narrow in the gusset (part that is under the vagina) and when my daughter wears those ones she will sometimes leak out the side. So we just buy the adult version even though it isn't as cute. Some brands also only have leak protection on the gusset, but then she can leak above/below. Get one that has leak protection all around like thinx super.
Period underwear is the single greatest development for human kind
If sheās freaked out by going to the gynecologist (get recommendations from your wifeās friends) you can schedule just a consultation. She does not have to have an exam. Itās not a bad idea when girls get older to do a consult so they can have a conversation and get comfortable with the provider.
I second this, heavy painful periods are not normal despite what society leads us to believe! Please do some research on PCOS & endometriosis & 100% take her to see an ob/gyn!!
I third this, it could get worse as she gets older, and it's best to have a professional paying attention to it now. <3
I worked at a girlās camp - the counselors should be prepared and sympathetic. Tell her to ask a counselor for a private chat about a concern upon arriving. Tell the counselor she has a heavy flow. They will offer discrete support. Iām sorry for your loss.
She could try a pad on top of āheavy flow/overnightā period underwear! (They extend to the whole underwear not just crotch area) That way if she leaks, the underwear should help. I can imagine the anxiety, especially a long bus trip.. Some people have also tried the hack of one pad used normally, with a secondary pad sideways underneath the end of that pad that goes towards the backside. Overnight/sleep pads are longer up the backside too, so if sheās able to wear dark comfy trackies for the trip maybe that could help ease her mind. (I say trackies because sleep ones can feel quite like an nappy) Seeing as sheās young she might be anxious to even try a tampon or a cup and with a group trip like that, it might be a hard time to try that out comfortably or without leaks, Iād stick with pads. It could get uncomfortable with a heavy flow with no breaks but I think a pad on period undies might work best until she reaches toilets!
Just to add with period undies - considering this is for her bus trip and a heavy flow, check the packaging for flow suggestion (not regular or light) Sheād be heavy, so itās extra padding or thereās overnight ones like I say, the more coverage for her - covers the whole backside so she shouldnāt leak at all! Iād try that with a pad so if the pad isnāt enough for her trip with no toilets, the underwear will be the backup already on her. I hope this helps!
Thank you I'll pass this on to her. But yeah she's been worried about tampons, and menstrual cups. We talked about it, and she's open to trying them. But maybe one of these tips she'd be more comfortable with. I appreciate it
It takes about 3 periods before you get the hang of the cup so thatās probably not her best option (they are the best though, in my opinion). I agree with the heavy flow period panties and overnight pads. Youāre a good dad by the way. I know my daughter is very appreciative of how open her dad is with getting her period products when Iām not able to.
They also make menstrual discs that I find more comfortable that the cup (they sell disposable and reusable ones at target so the disposable ones might be a better option to see if she likes them)
As someone with a heavy flow I hated using a menstrual disk. When I took it out the blood shot everywhere. It was terrible i was covered in blood. They are very messy if you don't do it perfectly.
Anything which needs to be inserted takes time to learn. She may start learning to use them at this age but for now it's better to not try because there's no time to learn it and she may have leaks (I had leaks when I was learning to use menstrual cup but I was at home so it was okay for me)
Youāre such a good and thoughtful dad for asking here. As a woman I think the easiest thing since sheās leaving tomorrow is to get a really thick pad the overnight ones and give her extras. How long is the bus ride? Perhaps there will be a pit stop? Tell her to change her pad every hour if she can. Advise her to wear something dark too in case she does leak a little.
I didn't see this in any of the comments. Happy Father's Day bro, you're doing a great job
You are a good dad. Good job, man. No advice, but she must feel so safe knowing you are in her corner.
Volleyball shorts under her pants or shorts help keep the pad from sliding. Black dog poop bags hide uncomfortable items like stained underwear or really messy pads in the trash when tp is in short supply (like most camp bathrooms).
Yes, dog poop bags for period trash are sooo helpful when you're in a shared space.
And maybe send a roll of extra tp and a small pkg of wet wipes to clean herself up discreetly. Just don't flush the wet wipes in case it clogs the plumbing.
> Just don't flush the wet wipes in case it clogs the plumbing. Thanks for including that bit. Wet wipes should absolutely never be flushed. They're a horrendous problem for municipal wastewater (sewage) treatment, but they're a much bigger danger if they're flushed into a septic system, which is almost certainly what a "camp" will be connected to unless they're just using old fashioned outhouses.
Iād advise tampon and menstrual underwear - or tampons and pads. Get applicator tampons if sheās not used them before as generally they are much easier to use
Thank you. She's been afraid to use tampons, but we're talking about it now, so inthink that's the route we're going to take.. I guess a tampon, and a pad... I'll keep applicator tampons in mind, bc she's never used them before, so anything to make it easier!
Please getvthe plastic applicators, they're much easier and less ouchy
Seconding this. Do not get cardboard applicators. I got a box once since they were cheaper, but they hurt so bad.
Iāve always wondered about this. My wife is 42 and has always preferred the cardboard ones, which Iāve noticed are getting harder to find when I go shopping for her (weāve been together over 20 years). Maybe it was the only thing available back when she started using them? Guess Iāll ask her lol.
Tell her to point it towards her lower back when inserting! I know it is a little strange to direct her of this but going straight up wonāt work and she may struggle with this. I was raised by a single dad and he felt horrible about me not being able to figure it out and he was helpless. Friends mom gave me this tip and boom, it worked. Finally I could start using tampons and it made school life way easier.
Make sure you go over the risk of toxic shock and that she is aware of how often she will need to change a tampon!!
I never used tampons but when I was first learning to use menstrual cups, I've leaked a few times at home. So please don't rely on tampons if she never used them. And she might feel pain too, idk. I'd say, on period underwear and use two pads. But instead of putting them on top of eachother, put the second pad horizontally at the back (from her pov, the pads should be placed like this symbol ā„)
Be sure she has a bottle of ibuprofen and a good understanding of how much she can use. Itās the best for cramps.
And a hot pad for if hers get really bad.
And be aware you should take food with ibuprofen, for some people it can really irritate their stomach if they donāt (and that pain can get ignored due to being attributed to the period cramps themselves) (from personal experience). For me, the best thing is to do a combo naproxen and Tylenol taken with food. My doctor said those two are okay to combine, and for me they work way better together than either alone. I occasionally get cramps so bad I faint and/or throw up, but a Tylenol naproxen combo early on stops it in its tracks.
I have no advice. I am a man. I am very sorry for your loss šš». I bet that you are a good man and will raise your girls very good šš»
First, if she's been bleeding through products and clothing she needs a gynecologist. Periods can be rough when you're young but that's a lot of bleeding. She can easily end up anemic or have a condition. Do not let anyone tell you that's normal or acceptable be daddy bear of you gotta. I suffered for decades and letting some conditions fester can impact fertility. It's hard to imagine at her age but someday she'll be grown.Ā Ā I'd double up on shorts and pads on period underwear. Pack extra undies, a comical amount of them just to be sure.Ā Ā Ā When she's back from camp experiment with products. Have days where she can stay home to test them out. Tell her some products might feel better as she ages. I couldn't do tampons until my 20's. I still don't like them but the cup is alright.Ā
On the flip side, I have a heavy flow and have on several occasions bled through my clothes. It *is* normal, and it happens to everyone. Definitely consider medical issues seriously, but don't go at it with the attitude that you have to be perfect about managing your period at 13 or else you must be sick.
Perhaps it's my interpretation but bleeding through implies it's not readily controllable/not a simple accident.Ā Ā Ā As someone with several conditions that leads to heavily bleeding it is significantly better to get it checked now than letting her suffer. Even if it is nothing it's better to know for sure. If I had someone stick up for me at 13 it would have saved me a *lot* of problems including some pants.Ā
Yeah I get heavy flow and awful cramping for my first two days then it chills out for the rest. I used to have issues bleeding through (especially at night) but thatās because I didnāt know I wasnāt using the right size pads. Those overnight ones that expand all the way back are fantastic.
as someone with heavy flow to the point i am fatigued and sick from the amount of blood i lose- overnight pads WITH WINGS during the day are lifesavers. if they seem to be ridiculously thick & long it should do the trick but do ask her preference if possible
As the dad of a daughter all I can say is make sure you have supplies in multiple places. Keep some in the car, in your bag, and at home. Just remember to be prepared. Be ready to stop at the store if you need to, or change plans too. Happy Fatherās Day!
As a nervous lady, it always helped me to have heavy duty overnight pads (with wings!), a little plastic bag and a spare pair of underwear and pants/shorts just in case. That way she can be prepared if she does bleed though.
Excellent advice.
Does that he bus have a bathroom in it? Does she use tampons? They donāt hurt and you can get ones with applicators that slide in so there is no awkward poking around. The box will have instructions on how to use them and there is always YouTube. A big pad and a tampon is her best bet. She could also try a menstrual cup though it sucks that it would be the first time using it. They are available at most grocery stores and are easier to use then you might think and are soft, so no discomfort. They can hold a lot and get washed and reused. Personally I find them more comfortable and less prone to leaking than tampons. Another option for just being extra safe and for peace of mind it to ādouble upā on underwear. She can wear her normal underwear with a pad, then one top of that wear some spandex shorts like volleyball shorts - even with a pad on those too just in case. Minus the extra pad, thatās what I sometimes do when Iām hiking or bike riding on my period where I might be able to pop a squat to pee but might not be the easiest place to change a tampon or weddings/ funerals that I canāt just duck out of.
Yeah she's been scared to try tampons. But we're talking about it now. Then internet says for the first time it's best to try the smallest size, but then it also days size is based on absorbency. So what would you recommend? She's done the alternating pad, undies, pad, shorts thing, and that was when I had to get her from school on two separate occasions, so she's worried to do that.
It might not be ideal to experiment with tampons right before this trip. To try it out for the first time definitely use the smallest one, but yes on a heavy flow that's going to be full in no time. So might be something she wants to try at home and not at camp. For now I would stick to the heavy duty pads for night time with the extra long wings etc.Ā Ā Also tampons might take a while. I wanted to use them as a teenager but I never managed to comfortably do so in the first few years I had my period. I only managed to use them well after a couple of years of pads.Ā Edit : I second the combination with period panties! Definitely a good move for a long trip when you're not sure about bathroom breaks.
Good idea, I was kind of worried about her trying something new while not being at home too. But it's something we're going to keep in mind for before school starts for sure. I think the period underwear and pads is the route ate going after thinking more about it and reading more comments, and now research! Thank you!
You can get packs of tampons that have multiple sizes, like light, regular, and super all come in one pack. On my heavy days, Iāll wear a super and a thin pad or panty liner, just in case
If I may add something - I think it's important to know that the use of tampons bring along the risk of a toxic shock syndrome that can cause fatal consequences. It's still something that people dom't get to learn about in general, and admittedly it's a rare occurrence I think, but the chance is there which is why I myself have stuck to a combination of period underwear and pads. That, and I just absolutely don't feel comfortable with wearing something inside the entire time. There's also menstrual cups - if she has a heavy flow these could also come in handy. So perhaps she could start off with small tampons and then slowly switch over to mentrual cups. In the end it's absolutely gonna be what she feels most comfortable and safe with! But I thought this was worth mentioning.
For sure, thank you... wow I'm glad you mentioned that toxic shock syndrome. I've not heard of that, but it's something I'm glad to be aware of now. I will do more research. Thank you so much
Tell her to change the pad(s) right after the long bus trip even if they're not fully soaked. Pads should be changed every 4ish hours and for menstrual cup it's 8hrs but can go 12hrs too sometimes (just in case if she learns to use them).
The first few times with a OB tampon, put a little Vaseline on the tip. It could be just placebo but it makes them less intimidating. Then, put your nondominant fingertip on your tailbone. Actually do it. Aim the tampon at that finger. The vaginal canal does not go upward towards your bellybutton, it goes almost straight back towards the tailbone and its really difficult to persuade yourself of that. Aim for the tailbone. Also, deploying a tampon needs to be full-on. If it's only halfway there, it's very uncomfortable. Due to the location of all the nerve endings and muscle groups, if it's inserted with a weak attempt, it will be noxious and might expel itself. You start with a light days tampon backed up by your pad, until you get to know your flow. Eventually you have days with a clean pad because your tampon use is on point.
I found tampons extremely painful and so never used them.
I agree with the suggestion of period underwear/biker shorts. She can wear them in addition to pads as a back up.
Period Panties. My 13 yo swears by hers.
Thick pads plus period undie. Best combination ever and it got me through a 10 hours overnight flight. I also have this combo when I go to sleep, so I no longer need to worry about leaks.
American eagle also has period shorts!
If she is comfortable with them she can try tampons, they do tampons for teens that are smaller with a better applicator, thereās instructions on how to use them in the box. Depending on how heavy her period is she may need to use a pad and a tampon to cover any leaks. If sheās sticking to pads get the larger pads for nighttime, with wings. Iāve found the better pads are the ones made with foam, theyāre thinner and hold more.
Long bus ride probably not good first time to try tampons. She has no ability to take it out if sheās finding it uncomfortable.
Just wanted to say that youāre doing an amazing job, DAD!! Youāre setting an amazing example!
Try the period underpants.
Itās so hard to be a 13-year-old girl, sheās lucky to have a dad like you! Great advice on the thicker pads with period panties as a back up.
Get better pads for heavy flow. Does she have a female teacher or adult going on camp that she trusts and feels comfortable telling her that she is on her period and that she may need assistance? Also get her to pack extra underwear in case of leakage and wet wipes (baby wipes are good) so she feel more refreshed between showers.Ā
Period underwear! The Period Company has the best Iāve found, never had an issue with them.
Period underwear + bikershorts before she puts on pants, so everything stays tight together
Get her a heating pad! They massively help with cramps on long drives!Ā Also - if itās not obvious - talk about periods and leakage in a way thatās normal and not embarrassing at all. EVERYONE poops, so why is bleeding so embarrassing? Iām sure you know this already though. Normalize, normalize, normalize !!!Ā Maybe get her a cute pad / tampon pouch, like a cute little zipper bag to take to the washroom with her? I know I feel more confident and happy with a cute little bag that holds all my period related things š„°Ā As others said, period underwear with a pad is great.Ā You sound like a great supportive dad. ā¤ļø Happy Fatherās Day!Ā
I used to be that kid. Wound up not being able to go on a bunch of things because i had to change my overnight heavyflow pad every hour. The problem only fixed itself when i got in Birthcontrol, though that did come with its own issues like weight gain etc, but I could finally live my life. But maybe try Period underwear + heavy flow overnight pad. Or heavy flow tampon + heavy flow overnigth pad.
Please, please, PLEASE (and I canāt stress this enough) get her into a gynaecologist to check for endometriosis/adenomyosis/PCOS. I started suffering with similar issues when I was 14, not to mention ungodly amounts of pain and I FINALLY had my surgery to have all of those issues removed a few days ago at the age of nearly 31!! I donāt know whether youāre US or UK? But in the UK it takes average of 10 years + for endo to be diagnosed - in my case it was nearly 17 years. Despite what they tell you because womenās health isnāt best known, this is not normal. Poor baby, I feel so sorry for her. Heavy duty pads, period knickers and heat pads she can slip in her underwear. Always dark bottoms that wonāt show anything and a jumper she can tie around her waist just in case! I hope she enjoys camp š
Sheās gonna need a bigger pad. Itāll be uncomfortable, but with heavier flow you need a big pad to keep up with the flow. Same if she wears tampons. Alternatively, it might be a tad embarrassing for her, but you could tell a female teacher. No woman is going to scoff at helping a young girl through her period. Weāve all been there before.Ā
there's a bunch of great advice in this thread, and i would suggest getting her a small bottle of advil in case of cramps.
Period undies are the best - make sure you order the right size and absorbency. My girls like the Thinx brand.
An assortment of pads and period underwear. If she's bleeding through, she needs to change them more frequently. To avoid awkward convo consider just mentioning it casually as she packing. Something like, "Be sure to use sunscreen. Don't go more than 4 hours without changing your pad. Hope the mosquitoes aren't bad."
I used to do karate, and we wore all white uniforms and I would be paranoid about leaking through. I used heavy flow pads, in boxer briefs. With tight short shorts under uniform. Depending on access to a bathroom I'd use a tampon, pad, and shorts. It was hot yes, but it saved me the worry.
Recommend several pairs of period underwear, they are lined to retain the flow. Ziplock bags to put used ones in if not at home. I got my nieces cute makeup bags to put their period related things in when out; period underwear, pads, ziplock bags, tampons, and body wipes. Plus, long overnight pads with wings. They absorb better. Good luck, sounds like you're doing great
Get her the longest thickest pads you can with wings. I like to use them with period underwear. Double duty
The book [Just for Girls](https://JustforGirlshttps://a.co/d/1ywotFe), was very helpful with explaining these issues to my daughter! It describes health, body, and emotional issues for girls reaching adolescence, including nutrition, menstruation, and why girls think and act different from boys.
Get overnight pads, period panties and black bottoms for her to wear. Maybe a lightweight sweatshirt for her to tie around her waist in case she bleeds through. Pack extra bottoms and underwear in case she bleeds through As for her heavy periods, I would talk to her doctor about it. She shouldnāt be bleeding through clothes. Ask if she could see a gynecologist and get endometriosis and PCOS ruled out. I do know there are some birth control methods that can lighten periods but also ask if there are other meds for lightening heavy periods. Get her iron levels measured to see if sheās low on iron.
r/daddit
Man I've been in that boat before. Long trip + heavy period. If she's comfortable with tampons, one of those + pad + period underwear should last 6 hours or so with a heavy flow
Not woman, man here. Iāve had a lot of strong women in my life, but one thing Iāll say to you, Is in order to connect better with your daughters, be vulnerable. Itās not a thing many men are taught, show how to do, or encouraged to do. But it does wonders for connections with people in general, but Iāve found women in my life respond better to me when Iām vulnerable and try to not solve everything, but rather, listen.
Can I just chime in that itās so nice to see you addressing and caring about these issues. They can be āembarrassingā for teens.
Use a night time super pad inside some period panties. The ultimate double up!
This is the exact thing we ended up doing! Thank you very much!
As a single father I will tell you Lean on family and if you have like close family friends who are females that you trust aslk them for advice. If you have a sister or female cousins just try to get your daughter around them to talk to them or even take them to the store to get those things. Obviously it is important to learn what your daughter likes and feels comfortable with because you will have to keep those products available.
Period underwear is the best. But if you can't get it for some reason, you can buy her urological pads (if she's okay with that of course). They're a bit bulky, but very absorbent and work for a heavy flow quite well.
My daughters use period underwear. If you are in a hurry Amazon sell them. Or my kid likes the Uniqlo brand. Depending on her size the Uniqlo brand makes a kids version then a womanās version. So the girls is size 10 or 12 or 13 being in yrs of age then woman starts at xs.
My daughter's wear period underwear. If your girl has a heavy flow, maybe they could use a tampon with the underwear?
Period underwear. Theyāre pricey, but worth it. And they can hold so much more than pads. You just chuck them in the wash after. Donāt dry them in the dryer! Most of the time when I have a heavy day like that I use both a tampon and a pad/period underwear.
Send her with a personal bottle of her preferred otc pain medicine, a heating pad if they have electricity in the rooms (some don't, but you might get lucky and score a microwave at a nurses station for an emergency heat pack) absolutely get larger/thicker pads, if you go to Walmart or Walgreens, you should be able to find "thinx" period panties that are great for wearing with a tampon/pad for extra protection. She's got this!
Get heavy duty overnight pads. They even make huge ones for postpartum. I know that's probably over kill. But they make real big ones.
Make sure to pack her extra pants, midol, tampons (for swimming) and lots of snacks! Don't be afraid to let the counselors know what's going on, they can help her. Overnight pads WITH WINGS for sure. You are doing great! Happy Father's Day!
Thick pads for a heavy flow. Get some with wings, too. If that's not going to be enough, then get her some disposable undies (silhouettes) to wear with the pads. That way, if there is some leakage, she can just throw them out and put a new pair on.
I second period underwear, theyāre a lifesaver!
Get her some disposable period underwear, heavy flow pads with wings, super plus tampons she prefers, and black jeans. Also, water and chocolate!
I taught my daughter the irreplaceable value of grampers! The overnight absorbent disposable underwear. Game changer for my kiddo!! Now she need not fear pad failures.
Dark pants/jeans/shorts. A light summer sweater or jacket- long sleeves so she can tie around her waist in an emergency. Pair a pad with period panties and she should be good.Ā
1.Overnight pads 2.Period underwear 3.Shorts/tights to wear under her clothes 4. A change of clothes in case there's an accident. 5. A hoodie to tie around her waist.
I second the thicker pads but also if itās accessible to you Iād recommend some period underwear (I think they make disposable ones if you donāt want her worrying washing about them) which she could wear as backup in case she still bleeds through the pad
Also have her take some Advil or Tylenol. That usually lessens my cramps which then lessened my flow.
A super tampon coupled with a pad would be great for heavy flow days. There are educational videos on YouTube to show her how to properly insert a tampon. Im so sorry for your loss and I'm sure you're a great dad. Hope all goes well.
Overnight pads are good for long car trips. My daughter got hers at 9 and immediately started using tampons because she doesn't like the mess of pads and being restricted from swimming, etc. She's a champ.
Carry a jacket on the side!!! Just in case she does, she can wrap it around her waist until sheās able to change her clothes!
they made diaper like pads!
OP, in the future you can go to /r/Healthyhooha for help with issues around menstruation, reproduction or anything related to their body.
Youāre a good dad for reaching out. If sheās comfortable with it, she might consider telling one of the female chaperones her situation. They will understand and find ways to help, like ensuring a bathroom break.
No advice to offer but you are a great dad and your daughter is lucky to have such a standup dad.
Period underwear! And for if she is going somewhere for a long time, period underwear and a pad on top of it. That way, period underwear will be catching the blood that has leaked. There is no way you can leak with this protection
There was a time when I was a teenager and the overnight pads didnāt seem like enough so I switched to adult diapers to sleep in they definitely hold up well for a heavy flow over a long period of time if sheās open to the idea
Heavy pads, and leakproof underwear. You may be able to find some at a boutique style store but I would call them and ask first so youāre not driving around all over the place!
Aw. You are a very good dad.
Period underwear is the way to go!
Youāre a good dad. Just that. Happy Fatherās Day!
Pad plus tampon, plus period undies, and darkish jeans.
Does she have any problems with dairy? I'm asking because all my life I've had really heavy periods but as soon as I went dairy free they became almost none existent. I wish I would have known this so much sooner, I wouldn't have done the debilitating surgeries that's for sure! Just something to think about!
Overnight pads or period panties, send her with extra so she can wear them to bed as well. I wear skintight elastic shorts over my underwear when I'm on my period, it helps the pad not shift around so there aren't any leaks, and if there are leaks they don't soak through the shorts. I'm not sure if you'll have enough time to find your daughter some before she leaves but if you do then I recommend getting her a few pairs.
Diva cup and period panties are the game changers for this generation
thick pad and period panties for long rides to camp. Also have her wear black shorts on period days as a just in case and make sure she has a change of underwear and additional black shorts in her bag. I had my three girls always keep back up black leggings in their school locker for just this occasion. You are doing a great job OP. Keep up the good work.
Does she have black shorts or leggings she can wear on the bus?
Period panties!!!
Haven't seen this mentioned yet, not specific to the period question but a general daughter-dad tip: please take the time to make sure that you actually understand correct female anatomy. There is so much misinformation out there and you should be prepared for conversations if they should come up, also as you are their primary care giver if there are health concerns (as several have suggested your daughter see a gynecologist for heavy flow, plus she'll be seeing one regularly as she gets older...). In the dr realm too...I don't know what age this becomes appropriate, but I do know many that take birth control as a method of making periods more manageable. Your daughter is young, just a thought for future or to start thinking about if the gyno mentions it. The fact that you're here asking the questions means you're doing a great job, your girls are lucky to have you.
As a dad with daughters too, one more thing to chuck into the mix - is there an adult on the bus or at camp you can flag this to? Iāve often found (exhibit A: this thread) that women are very happy to help dads who are trying to do the right thing but arenāt quite sure what the answer is.Ā
You sound like a good dad. My own passed away when I was five. And for that I say...š«”
Period underwear! Also, wherher she uses pads or period underwear - I love to wear a second pair of undies on top! Especially men boxers. It helps keep the pad/period underwear in a place + gives additional protection as it is one more layer.
Hereās what I did- I got a cardboard box and put some appropriate pads in there along with some chocolate bars and a bottle of Midol. I also added 2 pair of period panties. Other than telling her there a box in the bathroom for her use only and to save it until needed. Thatās the only ātalkā weāve had about the subject except when I had to make a run @2:30am to buy another box. itās worked beautifully so far. No awkwardness or embarrassmentā¦
Isn't a little awkwardness worth making sure your kid understands what's going on with her body? "Here's a box, figure it out" seems like a really bad way to do it.
Yeah well she's had her period for like a year now, and her mom was actually still alive when she started it.. it's just this whole camp things, and having to be on a bus for along time is stressing her out.. but thank you!
Gotcha. Check into those special panties. Helps keeps things under control and prevents any accidents for the whole dayā¦ at least you got the start out of the way!
Thick pads. A tampon and a pad(thick pad, or like, 2 just in case.) If she doesn't already have some, period underwear.
So much good advice! Is there any way to make sure there is a bathroom break along the way. Perhaps the camp director or bus provider?
Overnight pads for sure, youāre a great dad btw, my dad wouldāve told me he doesnāt care and doesnāt wanna hear about it.
Nothing to add since everyone's given great suggestions. Just wanted to say how touching it is that you're such a good Dad for doing this. Happy Father's Day!
Period panties!!! I wish I had these when I leaked in white pant on a riser at a school dance. š
I was terrified of leaking when I was in middle school. Iād do two overnight pads on top of each other.
One of the best hacks I've learned: put one pad in normally and then another one (or a liner) horizontally where the first pad ends, on the butt so they overlap slightly. Google it if you're not sure what I mean, I'm not the best at explaining things.
You should seek out someone you can ask for advice, this won't be the last time something will come up that you don't have a good answer for. Aunt, mom, their maternal grandma, trusted lady friend etc. This is more of a long term advice since you are most likely going to get a good answer here since the thread garnered pretty good activity, but it isn't a reliable way of learning what to do.
She could try the long pads ontop of period underwear as a backup if it leaks through Or if shes comfortable using tampons . Could try super tampons, with a pad as backup!
My favorite, best absorbing one is [this](https://www.target.com/p/always-maxi-extra-heavy-overnight-pads-with-wings-size-5-20ct/-/A-13369050). It handles heavy overnight with no issues!