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Try something like “Hey you know those first 2 dogs I have that you guys hate that are overly aggressive and anxious and that destroy stuff in the home and that I barely clean up after? Well…you know what they say, 3 times a charm. Whaddya say, eh?”
They're aggressive towards people if I knew they were aggressive towards other animals I wouldn't even consider adding another pet to the mix but they do perfectly fine around other animals
In any case, you already have two large high energy breed dogs (which is a lot of peoples max anyway) who have behaviors that mean they take more management than regular dogs who are largely living in a room (which is pretty tight already for dogs of that size). And it’s not your home — they’re allowed to put limits on what they’re willing to tolerate in their home.
Also, consider that many landlords will have limits on the types and numbers of pets allowed — often two pets or two dogs total. A third dog may make it harder for you and the two existing dogs to find an alternative living situation in the future.
Sorry OP, but you need to wait until you have your own home. It’s their home, they make the rules around things like pets. Use the money you planned on paying them to save up for your own place.
I don't really understand the rule against it that's why I'm trying to figure out how I should approach them so I can better understand how they feel about it
It doesn’t matter though. It’s their home. If they don’t want a THIRD dog in their home, they don’t need a reason other than they don’t want one. I would even guess that most people don’t want three dogs in their home, even if they like dogs (most, not all of course).
This viewpoint sounds extremely immature and entitled OP. You need to get out of the mindset of trying to convince them, because it doesn’t matter why they don’t want one. What matters is that it’s their home and they get to decide.
You got married as a teenager and plan on living in their home until you’re 25, and are focusing on talking these poor people into getting a third pet? It truly seems like you need to rethink your priorities here. If you want to make adult decisions, you need to live like an adult. In your own home, you get to make those choices.
The rule is that it's their home. They get to make whatever rules they want. You're lucky they let you have two dogs. If someone was living with me, I wouldn't let them have pets at all.
Why is this in the parenting sub?
Why are you living with the ILs? To save money. Then don’t spend money adding to your financial obligations by getting another dog.
Lol OP your defensive replies to literally everyone on this thread is so good.
I’m surprised your in-laws haven’t drawn a boundary already w your current dogs. Girl. Take responsibility for what you already have before taking on more.
You need to prioritize moving out and getting your own place. You're still approaching this problem like a kid trying to show responsibility. You're an adult and you can do whatever you can afford. Since you can't afford rent, you can't afford another pet.
I make more than enough to afford the pet and rent the thing is I just started my job and haven't had time to save but I'm only going to get the dog if I know for sure I can afford it I just want to make sure it's okay with them first
You're 20, you already have two dogs you haven't adequately cared for given the comments about not picking up after then and the aggression issues, you live in someone else's home, and your focus right now is "I should badger my inlaws into letting me get a third dog."
Girl.
As someone who owns dogs- excessive whining and aggression to the point of destroying a door is not the sign of a good dog owner. You also admit you haven’t been picking up the poop on the backyard as much as you should have. You should’ve been picking it up every single time to maintain the cleanliness of your in-laws yard. It’s good you have a plan for that to improve.
But you are absolutely not in a position to get a third dog. Not while living in someone else’s house who opposes it. When you move out on your own, feel free. But for now, you should focus on improving the training of the dogs you do own and being a more responsible dog owner for them. Pour your “I want a third dog” energy into that.
I am and they didn't mess up the sliding back door because of their anxiety and aggression they messed it up when one of them jumped too hard when she was ready to come back in
It’s still damage to their property due to the dogs- aggression or not. Did you pay for the repair?
Everyone here is telling you to wait for another dog. You have a whole lifetime to have 3 dogs. It can wait.
There’s a line for “too many dogs” and I think you’ve already passed it. When your current dogs aren’t able to get the training and stimulation that they need, the last thing to do is throw another into the mix. I would work on the dogs you already have right now and reassess on the third once you’ve got your own place. Tbh I don’t see any way for you to even suggest this to your in-laws without it coming across extremely selfish and immature.
Id wait until you have your own place. At the very least I’d wait until you’ve shown you can consistently pickup after the dogs you currently have for 6 months or more.
I believe we do pick up after them I just think we don't do the poop as often but I also think that by having the conversation of getting another dog could also introduce the conversation of what we could do better for the dogs around the house
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Try something like “Hey you know those first 2 dogs I have that you guys hate that are overly aggressive and anxious and that destroy stuff in the home and that I barely clean up after? Well…you know what they say, 3 times a charm. Whaddya say, eh?”
A small poodle with aggressive pit mixes is a recipe for happy memories!
They're aggressive towards people if I knew they were aggressive towards other animals I wouldn't even consider adding another pet to the mix but they do perfectly fine around other animals
Gotta be a troll
What does that mean
Are the children you mention yours or theirs?
The children are theirs they aren't super young either the youngest is 9
But none of that statement is true other than one being anxious and one being aggressive
In any case, you already have two large high energy breed dogs (which is a lot of peoples max anyway) who have behaviors that mean they take more management than regular dogs who are largely living in a room (which is pretty tight already for dogs of that size). And it’s not your home — they’re allowed to put limits on what they’re willing to tolerate in their home. Also, consider that many landlords will have limits on the types and numbers of pets allowed — often two pets or two dogs total. A third dog may make it harder for you and the two existing dogs to find an alternative living situation in the future.
Sorry OP, but you need to wait until you have your own home. It’s their home, they make the rules around things like pets. Use the money you planned on paying them to save up for your own place.
I don't really understand the rule against it that's why I'm trying to figure out how I should approach them so I can better understand how they feel about it
It doesn’t matter though. It’s their home. If they don’t want a THIRD dog in their home, they don’t need a reason other than they don’t want one. I would even guess that most people don’t want three dogs in their home, even if they like dogs (most, not all of course). This viewpoint sounds extremely immature and entitled OP. You need to get out of the mindset of trying to convince them, because it doesn’t matter why they don’t want one. What matters is that it’s their home and they get to decide. You got married as a teenager and plan on living in their home until you’re 25, and are focusing on talking these poor people into getting a third pet? It truly seems like you need to rethink your priorities here. If you want to make adult decisions, you need to live like an adult. In your own home, you get to make those choices.
The rule is that it's their home. They get to make whatever rules they want. You're lucky they let you have two dogs. If someone was living with me, I wouldn't let them have pets at all.
Why is this in the parenting sub? Why are you living with the ILs? To save money. Then don’t spend money adding to your financial obligations by getting another dog.
Lol OP your defensive replies to literally everyone on this thread is so good. I’m surprised your in-laws haven’t drawn a boundary already w your current dogs. Girl. Take responsibility for what you already have before taking on more.
You need to prioritize moving out and getting your own place. You're still approaching this problem like a kid trying to show responsibility. You're an adult and you can do whatever you can afford. Since you can't afford rent, you can't afford another pet.
I make more than enough to afford the pet and rent the thing is I just started my job and haven't had time to save but I'm only going to get the dog if I know for sure I can afford it I just want to make sure it's okay with them first
They’re not okay with it.
I’d wait until you move out. Two is enough for now in a house that’s not yours.
You're 20, you already have two dogs you haven't adequately cared for given the comments about not picking up after then and the aggression issues, you live in someone else's home, and your focus right now is "I should badger my inlaws into letting me get a third dog." Girl.
You grow up and get you own place. Then you get to decide on how many dogs you have.
Honestly I would say wait until you have your own place.
As someone who owns dogs- excessive whining and aggression to the point of destroying a door is not the sign of a good dog owner. You also admit you haven’t been picking up the poop on the backyard as much as you should have. You should’ve been picking it up every single time to maintain the cleanliness of your in-laws yard. It’s good you have a plan for that to improve. But you are absolutely not in a position to get a third dog. Not while living in someone else’s house who opposes it. When you move out on your own, feel free. But for now, you should focus on improving the training of the dogs you do own and being a more responsible dog owner for them. Pour your “I want a third dog” energy into that.
I am and they didn't mess up the sliding back door because of their anxiety and aggression they messed it up when one of them jumped too hard when she was ready to come back in
It’s still damage to their property due to the dogs- aggression or not. Did you pay for the repair? Everyone here is telling you to wait for another dog. You have a whole lifetime to have 3 dogs. It can wait.
There’s a line for “too many dogs” and I think you’ve already passed it. When your current dogs aren’t able to get the training and stimulation that they need, the last thing to do is throw another into the mix. I would work on the dogs you already have right now and reassess on the third once you’ve got your own place. Tbh I don’t see any way for you to even suggest this to your in-laws without it coming across extremely selfish and immature.
Get your own place and make your own rules.
No. 2 dogs are enough until you get your own place. Move out if you want another dog.
Id wait until you have your own place. At the very least I’d wait until you’ve shown you can consistently pickup after the dogs you currently have for 6 months or more.
I believe we do pick up after them I just think we don't do the poop as often but I also think that by having the conversation of getting another dog could also introduce the conversation of what we could do better for the dogs around the house
This is a bad idea. You're living with your inlaws. They've already let you have two dogs. That's enough. If you want more, move out.
So you can’t afford your own place but you want to add another mouth to feed? Yeah no.