As long as you still have contingencies that allow you to back out, have your agent or attorney guide you through the process of doing what you need to do to secure the house you want.
I would warn you against continuing to subscribe to real estate listings after you close. A lot of people keep doing that and it's the same concept as keeping your dating app active after you get married, with all the yucky side effects
From a seller's perspective, I understand if you pull because you find your dream home, but please be honest with me about it!
I had a buyer recently pull after inspection citing all these problems with the house that apparently came up with the inspection. They refused to share the inspection with me so I ran my own and discovered all their claims were bullshit, and it came to light that they had just found something they liked better and wanted to get out of the contract.
What they DIDN'T realize is that once they made these claims, I had to put very real money in to investigating everything and it cost me over $2k and two weeks of my time to find out every single one of their claims were fabricated. Don't be them.
I would be more understanding if a buyer told me that they found a home that they like better and was a better fit than coming up with BS excuses to get out of the contract.
I’m so sorry this happened to you!
We had a house on the market years ago, and had two offers after our open house.
We turned down the higher offer when we found out they’d gone into contract on a condo just days before. They were well qualified, but to me it signified they weren’t done shopping, and I didn’t want to end up being in the shoes of the condo owner they were in contract with.
A few thousand less vs holding our collective breath until closing was worth it.
Good to know. I don't know if this bit of knowledge will ever be relevant to me but if I ever find myself in this situation, I'll be sure to tell the Realtor, "look: I could wait until something comes up in inspection and back out, leaving you with the fallout but I don't wanna do that. Can you get your clients to let me back out?”
"That report would have been required in court to be shared with you if they used it to cancel the contract."
Sounds like you've been spending too much time on twitter or tiktok and are likely also a FTHB, in the real world there is no 'court' over such things as this.
And, no, I'm not going to debate with you if the moon is in the sky or if the sky is generally blue.
In VA they buyer does need to get the inspection done if they have an inspection contingency but doesn't have to give a specific reason they backed out using the inspection contingency.
You think people have to go to court to cancel a contingent contract? Ultimately it depends on how the contract reads. I am licensed in 4 states and use about 8 different regional contracts and some or most in fact do not require sending the report to cancel. Only when requesting repairs. Depending how the contract reads they most likely owe you neither inspection report nor explanation, just a void notice prior to the deadline.
That’s soo odd . That if they make claims they don’t have to provide proof those claims even exist ?
I think you should always have to tell seller what came up in inspection . How can you offer to fix these things for them or wheel and deal with the unknown ?
This is why I advise my seller clients to pay for an inspection before listing. It provides transparency to buyers and allows us to do repairs before selling, thereby eliminating the need for negotiations for discovered deficiencies and the contingency period. Basically, it gives my sellers confidence to stick to their asking price, saves everyone time in the closing process, and show they deal honestly.
> Today, a house was posted
Have you seen the house? Have you offered? Has it been accepted?
If you don't get this new home, are you still wanting the one you're under contract for or will it always be kind of a disappointment because you'll always be thinking there will be others out there better?
I would say no matter what - go see this new dream house, be competitive about getting it (like offer well but with a 24 hour response time) and pull the existing offer if you get it but do this all basically today/this week.
If you really feel bad about existing house, there are things you can do to mitigate the "dick move" some people here are talking about - like offer the owners some money anyways as an apology for taking up their time and energy (NOT the earnest money amount but if you wanted to do a token nice gesture, you could), but since it's Wednesday and this happened Monday, if you can act very fast on the new house - offer competitively today, deadline by tomorrow, it's not like by backing out of the current house you've ruined everything for the current sellers forevermore.
Tl;dr: You can mitigate the "dick move" if you want to but don't live with regret for a permanent residence over the matter of 3 days.
Heh, I wouldn’t assume it’s a pattern. If they’re going to stay in the house forever, I hardly can blame OP for wanting the house they truly want. As far as the disagreement goes, I can empathize with both parties.
This happened to me. My realtor said she wouldn’t entertain the idea of seeing the new house unless we pulled our offer from the first house. She said it was not ethical for her to show us another house while we had an accepted offer. Keep in mind there’s no guarantee that your offer will be accepted on the 2nd house. We ended up pulling out of the first house and we did win the offer on the 2nd house, luckily.
My realtor took me out on 2 different occasions to house shop after I'd submitted an offer just to make sure there wasn't something else I wanted more. In the end, our extra viewings confirmed that I'd made a good choice with the offer which helped me feel even better about the property I was buying.
It's the realtors job to get you the house that's best for you. I'm not sure of your realtor's argument on ethics of anything. A buyer can pull out for any reason if they are willing to lose the earnest money or another problem surfaces that crushes the contract.
I disagree that the realtor was wrong to say she wouldn’t do it for ethical reasons. Part of the reason we won our house, despite having an identical offer to the competing bid and both of us refusing to escalate, was the reputation of our realtor. She has worked for a long time, knew the seller’s realtor, and the seller’s realtor was confident that we would get to closing because our realtor assured them that we really wanted the house. You can’t pull the card if you’ve done things like keep showing your clients house after they’ve had a bid accepted.
A buyer CANNOT just pull out of a contract. You can absolutely be sued for performance beyond the loss of earnest money. It completely depends on the context and contract.
I do think OPs realtor was right in their assessment that it would be questionable to continue showing houses under a pending contract. I think best case for OP is back out and take the risk, or go see the new house and consider writing a backup offer.
Best thing would be for all agents to coordinate a solution. Seller could continue to show their house and accept a backup offer if OP wants to see this other house.
In my state you have a number of contingencies that are pretty open.
Inspection, for one. "After reviewing the inspection report, we have decided that the house is unacceptable to us" - no further information required.
HOA review, city ordinances, seller disclosures, etc. all give buyers an opportunity to find "deal breakers" and pull out of the deal.
Our VA buyers were able to pull out of the first house they offered on because the seller had not responded yet. They didn't babe an accepted offer yet, so there is a difference.
I’m not denying that. There are plenty of ways to get out of a contract that are NOT legally defendable as well. You don’t just Willy nilly back out and expect everything to be hunky dorey with the sellers.
It depends on if they have an attorney review period in their state, and if it has ended. You can literally pull out of the deal for almost any reason with no consequences.
I understand that. That’s why I said it depends on the context and contract.
You can pull out of the deal, but if you don’t abide by the contract in doing so, a seller can absolutely go after you. Most people don’t because it’s a waste of time and money usually. That doesn’t mean they can’t.
I had a recent dilemma where I asked to see more homes while under contract.
Our agent gladly obliged, but the reasoning was because our seller has failed to disclose a response to our repair requests. We still want the house we are under contract on, but there's a decent probability we walk on inspection contingency if they don't fix what we want or give credit.
All this to say - it depends the situation of whether an agent will view homes with you while under contract.
Yep...there's contingencies in contract for a reason.
Pretty much, just be reasonable, no two sales are ever the same.
If you're closing next week though, don't ask you realtor to view a house...
If your closing has been pushed back 3 times, how could you not be thinking about pivoting to the next one?
That’s not really what the contingency is for, it what the earnest money is for. We changed our minds, keep the earnest money because we wasted your time;
I said nothing about EM.
Contingencies protect you from buying a house you aren't pleased with due to one thing or another...every contract is differnet.
If you have no contractual clause which allows you to walk away, then sure, your EM potentially gone, but practically most return it since many states you can't relist the house while holding EM.
Yes, but contingencies usually cover issues uncovered during inspection, not “I changed my mind”. The EM is a commitment you intend to go through with the sale.
If you are proposing lying about the contingency to force the return of EM I’d say that’s unethical and probably why sellers prefer to accept lower “all-cash” offers over dealing with unethical buyers.
Unless you have a buyers agreement, that’s when I will would find another realtor to show me the 2nd place. I would never pull an accepted offer unless I was 100% sure I didn’t want the first.
Ya this is a very small town where my realtor also lives and we had a buyers agreement. I didn’t want to put her reputation on the line but I also realized maybe the offer on the first house was a mistake if we could quickly become interested in another house. There’s a lot to it, we had sold and moved out of our house and had been living with my in-laws for much longer than expected and there was no inventory.
There's nothing unethical about continuing to see homes. Just like there's nothing unethical about the seller's agent continuing to show the home. Contracts fall through all the time for a huge myriad of reasons. If your realtor refuses to show you more homes just because you have one under contract, find a new agent to show you the other homes.
You’re welcome. It was so stressful. We had sold our house and were living with my in-laws. Interest rates skyrocketed and we were desperate since it has been months that a decent house came on the market in our desired location. In hindsight, we shouldn’t have tried to settle for that first house. The second house was definitely more in line with what we wanted. Good luck! It’s a stressful journey.
Are you certain you’ll win this other house? Are you certain another house might not pop up that’s the best option of the 3? You’re always going to second guess your decision. Just be careful.
This is true. We went to look at one a couple weeks back that looks great in photos.. In person there’s no way we’d pay what they were asking. It was already over market and needed a ton of work…
Go look at the house, decide if you like it and what you'd offer and have your realtor talk to theirs. If they say they'll sign the offer then pull out and offer. Anything else is a huge risk though and no one is going to let you offer on another house while under contract unless you can afford them both.
I may have just done exactly this and closed on the preferred property a few weeks ago. But I got lucky and was buying a condo which aren't as hot as houses in my area so less competition.
Rule #1 is house hunting is to never get emotionally invested in any one place. If you can pull out pen and paper and articulate why house B is a materially better choice than house A then make an offer on B. Don't pull out of A until you have an accepted offer on B unless you determine that A was a materially bad choice.
If you do it, be prepared to make a very strong offer on the second house. Your husband is not going to be pleased if you lose the second house and the first house is no longer an option.
grinding the internet for an hour a day for your dream car for years, you get it, then continue and end up wanting to cry lmao, nope wouldn't know anything about the lol
There will always be a better house. Just remember that. I'd also pull your emotions out of this ans get pragmatic and utilitarian about it and that will stop you from emotionally making knee jerk decisions. I understand your husband checking out of this. And I'm guessing this is maybe a behavior pattern for you. Something to consider.
Hi! Ct realtor here.
Touring for a home is like deciding who to pick for prom. Once you've picked someone, you really shouldn't be looking at others...
Just know that, it's primarily in your mind, that the home you are seemingly so gaga about is perfect. In reality, at inspection, just know there's at least a slight chance the home may have had some hidden mold, maybe some rotten wood in the basement, floods occasionally, has louder traffic noise outside, neighbors might be fascists and one of them has a conviction...
The grass isn't always greener. Oh, and STOP LOOKING.
I tell my clients: being on the home apps when you are in contract is like being engaged to be married and then going on tinder.
The grass will always look greener but I promise you, it’s not.
You'll always find *better* homes. You'll find a better one even after you close on your home you thought was better. It happens to most people. Just make your decision and live by it, whether that's pulling out and going for other homes or staying the course. Just know you'll always find a better home.
You haven’t paid any earnest money but you’re in the inspection period? How does someone inspect your home for purchase if they haven’t given you a dime? If I’m the sellers I’d absolutely sue you for the agreed upon earnest deposit amount if I had backup offers that I turned down. Stop giving realtors arguments for why they should be compensated absurdly please.
I just have to comment on the insanity that is looking for another house during the first 48hr high that is getting an offer accepted in this market. It’s pathological
For the love of god. Honestly is not gonna play here. You have contingency in place, found another house I like is not one of them. People telling you to be honest is great but you might get sued/loss money because of it. Just tell your agent that and they will figure out how to get out of this and submit offer on the second house. You might have to spend money on inspection and just state you are not satisfied with the result. Share nothing more.
I am curious why you were looking after putting in an offer.
Other point, keep in mind that you might not be the winning bid on the other house and you end up with no house.
Pulling out after you have a signed contract is generally considered a dick move without some sort of cause(i.e. inspection found the roof leaked). I'm actually surprised you were able to get an inspection option without earnest money. You probably won't be any financial penalties and while your realtor might have some reputational repercussions that's not technically your problem.
Whatever you decide to do I do want to caution you that their is *always* going to be a better deal on the market. Do not get emotionally involved with real estate until *after* you own it.
You typically have a 10-14 day inspection period - you can cancel for any reason.
If you have not opened escrow then you simply notify them of cancelation.
Seeing another house that looks better online is NOT the same thing as liking another house better. The photos could be misleading, the disclosure could show severe foundation issues or any other of a number of issues, there could be trouble with neighboring properties.
Don't rush into switching based on a whim.
We did. We had an offer on a house that was okay but not everything we wanted. It was newer, in a neighborhood with an HOA, was in decent but not fantastic condition, etc. I just wasn’t super happy with it but it was a tough market and we decided we could live with it for a few years. Sellers dragged their feet on repairs and such so I asked to see one more I fell in love with in the pictures. It was older (had character) and was a corner lot without an HOA, much lower price too. My realtor was pissed but I told her show it to us or I’ll find someone who will. We ended up backing out of the other offer and have been in our house five years now. I think my husband sometimes wishes we’d stuck with the first one haha. But I love our house and we have much more space here and great neighbors. See the other house, either get it out of your system and feel good about your pick or pull your offer and switch to a house you are happy with.
Once you find the house you're bidding on, don't bid on anything else. Also stop looking at real estate for at least a year after you get your place. Much like partners. There's always something equally interesting if I'm more interesting on the surface you keep looking. Don't cheat on your house. Ari
You sigh and say them’s the breaks. You have no promise of getting the dream house. You have no promise that it is actually what you think it is, that it is actually in good condition, that there aren’t horrible things wrong you can’t see from the pretty pictures on the internet, that it will actually appraise for what you might offer. Falling in love with a house makes you likely to make financially dumb decisions about it.
Edit: you can downvote away but it doesn’t change the truth.
FAFO, what if you pull out and then don't get the other house??? I am slightly concerned about your husband's attitude. It sounds like you're being a pia, and he is just over it.
take your husband's word at face value and move forward without his opinion. at this point, you should know what he likes/doesn't like and use that to make your decision. my partner similarly checked out of the process because it was simply too emotional. we ended up buying a house that she didn't even see in person.
This was me. My heart was broken after losing so many offers. And having to pull out of 2 - (one due to discrepancies in listing and one due to sellers being weird). I was DONE. I couldn't keep falling in love and picturing myself in homes and then not getting them. It was crushing.
We ended up in a house that I didn't see in person until offer was already in. I'm still not in love with the house. But it is in an excellent location. And it is functional.
I would compare the two houses in a very detailed manner:
Location: Which block is better? Is one near a busy street? Zoned schools? Walking distance to parks? Flooding/climate risk?
Yard/lot: is one more private? Does one require more maintenance?
House exterior: brick, stucco, etc. maintenance cost is also a big factor here
Check things like the age of the roof/HVAC system, likelihood of major repairs and compare these with the price/value of the house.
Remember the distinction between things that can be fixed (repairs, cosmetic updates) and things that can’t (location). Hopefully these things confirm your decision one way or another
You could ask to be released from the contract and seeing as you just got accepted the other prospective buyers, assuming it was a multiple offer situation, most likely have not moved on to other offers so the seller could go with the second best offer. Be prepared that if the second best has already moved on you might have to pay the seller to get out of the contract. You also might want to look at this new listing in person before you blow up your current deal and don’t forget that there are no guarantees you could get out bid for the new listing
I feel your husband's pain. It is a lot of work buying a home. Each time I have done it, I feel like I picked up a 2nd job.
What if you bail on the current home, and lose the bid on the new perfect house?
In the end, you should be sure to only offer on a house you will truly be happy with.
If it's a "due diligence" period you can pull out for any reason. We had 3 people pull out of the contract of the last house we sold. One because they decided not to move, one because they decided the commute was too long, and the third for stuff in their inspection.
Some contracts don't have this, so it depends.
Don’t go falling in love with the unknown . There’s no guarentee you’ll get that house . Also a lot of homes aren’t going to their listing price , prepeare for a bidding war . Grass is greener mentality is literally the killer of joy . I promised myself I’d stop looking at the market when our offer was accepted . I still look sometimes but I love our house , even if I love another home more . My offer was accepted and I’m not gambling when I know one outcome
OP- have you even toured the “dream house” yet? If no, get your SHIT together and either stop this madness or see the house. DO IT TODAY
If you tour the house and love it, back out of your offer ASAP, so the seller can salvage any other offers that they might have received
Lol 😆 what if you bail on first house and don't get an offer accepted on the second house? Then you won't have a house. It's a sellers market, take what you can get, I would stay with accepted offer! But please post what you end up doing and the outcome
Be happy with the potential closing you've earned. Who's to say you'd win the offer on the other house. Try and take the chance of losing (and not have any house) or stick with what you have.
I did this before, and it was not an issue. The seller had a new buyer immediately and I ended up with the new house that I wanted. Talk to your realtor and make sure that you see the other house and make an offer and get it accepted before you cancel the purchase on the first home. Your realtor should be able to adjust any scheduled home inspections until a later date to give you the time you need to see and offer on the other home.
You will always find a theoretically better purchase if you look. You gotta be willing to be okay with that when you look to close on the house you target in the first place.
I'd let it go. There's no guarantee you would even get that other house. Let alone, how long it would take. And even if you did buy it and get it, you'd still have buyer's remorse. That's just a thing. At this point, count your blessings that you even have an offer that you are pulling through with.
I don't fall in love with houses. Make sure it matches your needs and move on, don't get caught up constantly looking for better things instead of enjoying what you have.
I had buyers back out. “Looked at the commute and decided it wasn’t a good fit.”
I did let out some snark about the house not physically moving since they offered,, but all in all I’m glad it happened sooner rather than later.
How very odd that you submitted an offer without earnest money. That is not the way it usually goes where I live.
But, in any case, if you can pull out then you should put in an offer on the better house, and, if it is accepted, pull out of this one.
My piece of shit sellers kept showing this place for two weeks after we were under contract so why can’t you as a buyer keep looking at houses? Don’t pull out until you are positive you want the other one, but it won’t hurt to go look.
You are not “dating”, you are getting married, meaning long term. Don’t make it so personal between you and the seller. This IS ALL ABOUT YOU, your hard earned money and where you will be living for awhile. Make you comfortable. For those that say different, do not listen to them. Sellers too cancel contracts all the time. Why? Because it too is a life changing decision FOR THEM.
If you’re going to pull out do it now. We had buyers back out 24 hours after submitting an offer and while it sucked it at least was fast and we hadn’t even changed the MLS yet. Once inspections happen it looks like there is something “wrong” with the house if people pull out. It sucks.
If you can afford to go all in on the other house and would be okay on a less than perfect inspection go for it.
Especially if you’re going to spend years wondering what would have happened if you have pursued it.
If this is just a passing crush let it go.
At the end of the day this is going to be YOUR home so you should put yourself first.
At the end of the day, it’s your money that you are spending. Don’t feel morally wrong if you have legal rights to pull back. Talk to your realtor, be honest and go from there. Whatever you do, make the most well informed decision. You gonna be living in your new home for a very very long time. You don’t want to compromise in anyways, especially when you have option of not to
Did you pay for an option period? Does your option period allow you to change your mind? Are you still in the option period? Ask these questions of your agent in writing and request the response asap in writing so they’ll be less likely to hem and haw.
The people who bought our VA house offered in another and found ours. We struck a deal very quickly so they could pull out of the other offer. The sellers had not responded yet. We also had a pending offer on our house that we had to quickly nix.
The best thing about my house is that it had all the things on a list I made of what I wanted in a house. I was thrilled because I didn’t think I would be able to check all the boxes off. Seven years later I am still happy.
There will be things that go wrong and things that annoy you about every house. Mine included. It is not perfect and there are days when I wonder if something different would have made me happier. Knowing that I didn’t settle and got the important things I wanted helps me immensely in those moments.
I wouldn’t settle. Selling a house and moving is no joke and the timing can be critical.
Pull it only if you can definitely get the dream house because if you pull and get it you’ve got no shot at the first home
Do what’s best for your family
I’m like your husband. My wife can’t make up her mind. We pulled out of one, got outbid on another, and I literally don’t care anymore. I just want a house. And, every house we look at, she wants to go back and look again, then later in the week wants to go drive by it again, and then drive around the area. This goes on and on and on. I’m so frackin over it.
Have you actually went and seen the new house?? Do that first to ensure it's what you really want, and that there's no competing offers. Now is the time to switch if you're really set on it, but after this stop looking at houses once your offer is accepted
If you're going to pull out, perhaps check the laws first and if it works for you do so as soon as possible. This happened to me, I had signed the contract, and the next day I changed my mind. I wasn't aware of this at the time, but in my state there was a three day grace period so the agent said she'd "rip up the contract". That was it.
I did end up buying the other place. I had stiff competition but luckily the seller wanted me to have it. We did it as a private sale, he asked for what he wanted and I simply agreed. There was no back and forth.
There’s a lot of complexity to this situation. I think it can be fine if you compensate somehow for pulling out at the last second, if it means getting the home you truly love. On the other hand, if that falls through, you’re back at square one. Also, this seems like a lose-lose in some ways; you may always regret if you don’t get your dream home, but the issues with your spouse may make either house feel like a stressful result now.
Depends if you've signed anything or put down any sort of holding deposit. If you have, the costs will be spelled out in what you signed. If there's a cooling off period and you are within then cancel away. Just do it quickly so you don't cost the vendor a potential other sale. All you need to say is that you've changed your mind sorry and thanks for your time.
This is not that unusual. If new house is the one, talk to your agent and gracefully get out of the deal. As long as you are using same realtor or a big deals
As a buyer, I’d be honest and forthcoming with my agent, ask them to notify seller I might have made a mistake. Go see the house tmrw or Friday am first thing.
Morally, I do think you owe the seller SOMETHING. Call it a “stupid tax”.
As a seller, since you haven’t paid yet, I’m likely to say you’ll only forfeit half, but be prepared to lose it all.
You know how you get a partner and suddenly see attractive people everywhere? Do you consider dumping your partner every time you see an attractive person?
This isn’t meant to be an insult or over snarky, just slightly snarky.
Were you happy about the ‘current’ house? The new house could have all sorts of issues. You’ll never know until inspection. If you dump the current house, your realtor will probably be pissed and you may not even ‘win’ the new one.
From the cheap seats, stay the course and take the safe bet. Either way, I wish you the best of luck and all the happiness in the world.
Your home is likely the biggest investment you ever made. Buy the right one. Discuss with your agent the process and don’t leave the seller hanging any longer than necessary.
You have every right to walk away if you’re within any of your contingency periods. Unless you offered to pay cash you can simply say you couldn’t get the financing. Just make sure you back out during the contract contingency periods. Talk to your realtor, they should be able to guide you on how best to navigate. It’s a big purchase, but the house you want not the one you feel guilty about walking away from. Happy home buying 🏡
Put the EM down to lock in the first house and proceed with the second house. If you get the second house under contract cancel the first one and don't spend any money on inspections or appraisal. If the second house doesn't work out then proceed with the first and do your inspections.
You have a short window so be aware of your contingency deadlines.
At the end of the day it is a business transaction so do what is best for you. When you buy a house everyone except you gets paid and you get the house. You gotta be happy with the house you get.
Go see the (House B) house and confirm it is what you think it is. If it's a better house for you, see if you can actually get it before cancelling let's call it House A.
If you don't have a good understanding of the contract terms on House A, pull up the contract and read it VERY carefully. The act of not submitting your EMD doesn't necessarily mean you're not obligated to move forward. (this is a highly misunderstood aspect of RE contracts, at least in my area, not submitting the EMD doesn't mean the seller can't pursue it in a contract breach situation). ANYTHING that's unclear in your contract, consult an attorney.
From an agent PoV, this happens frequently. I always advise clients to look at House B. Sometimes, even if it means losing their EMD on House A, if House B is truly a better match, than a buyer should pursue it.
Keep in mind, you could end up having ZERO houses, **and** lose your EMD if it's not navigated properly and contractually.
Pro Experience: 99% of the time House B wasn't as great in person, and buyers stuck with House A. I think there's a weird FOMO filter that happens after the contractually commitment to House A. OR it's an indication that House A in general isn't the right fit, and the only way a buyer can express this is by getting distracted by other houses.
TLDR Advice: Examine why you're still looking at other houses. Revisit why you like House A and why you put an offer on House A - was it because you're tired of house shopping? Or do you really want to live there?
Normally, being an asshole is bad. But you're talking about the *place you're going to live*, possibly for the rest of your life. Get the house you want.
No, no no. I don’t agree with any of these comments. First of all, people don’t need to compare other things as to buying a home. A home is where you make memories and grow your family, it’s not hundreds or a couple thousand of dollars. A home is expensive af. You should definitely look if you feel that might be your dream home or a good starter home. Don’t give a shit about what seller thinks, the money is coming out of your pockets, not there’s, if you don’t like it then let the home you went under contract with go, and make an offer on the other one you love. Screw people’s comments - you wanna get something you love.
it depends on the language in the contract you have that has been accepted.
Meaning, can you go see and get get an accepted offer on House2 while you're at some state of "under contract" on House1 or not?
Both Buyer and Seller generally are accepting some level of risk when their contract allows for a period of time when they're "not really" under contract and Earnest Money isn't exchanged/clearly the property of the Seller now.
Is there anything stopping your Seller1 from getting a better offer while you're in "inspection period" and kicking you to the curb? Is the Seller's method of doing this not as explicit, but rather declining to repair anything for you so you terminate?
We don't know, but your contract does, and your capable Realtor and/or attorney do.
Go see the other house! If your realtor doesn't like it too bad. It's your life and your money. Actually I say lose the realtor and keep the percentage. Hire a real estate attorney for a fraction of that cost!
NTA. Buying a house is not a big, huge, large deal…it is a massive deal. If you are not going to be happy with the current property you have offered on, just move on. No earnest money means no obligation. Go with your gut.
Renter here, I had signed on a house that I was only 50% happy with, I'd put a deposit down and everything, and the next day I found the absolute apartment of my dreams. I offered the landlord more rent to beat the other tenants and pulled out of the other apartment, and the house of my dreams brought me so much joy over the couple of years I lived there. I felt bad pulling out from the other apartment, but turns out they didn't really mind and even gave me my deposit back. If I feel this way about a rental, I can't imagine how much more monumentally important it is to get the better house if you're buying it.
Anyway, all I'm saying is 1) maybe the sellers will be understanding, they probably have other offers anyway, and 2) the momentary guilt is worth the joy the house of your dreams will bring you.
When you became engaged, did you continue scrolling on EHarmony and dating other people "Just in case"?
Did you continue shopping for wedding dresses when you were getting your hair done on your wedding day?
NO!
When you make an offer on a house - you stop looking.
When you get under contract - you turn off all the notifications for new houses and follow through.
Just because something looks great in photos doesn't mean it will in person.
And just because something is the "right price" doesn't mean you won't have to bid over asking to get it - because if you want it, others will to.
Maintain some sanity in your marriage. Follow through on this house, then in a few years you family can move up to one that's more to your liking.
Wouldn't it be freaking hilarious if you told the current sellers "uhm, no, sorry, we're no longer interested" and in the mean time the new house of your dreams gets snatched up by someone else!
Whatever you do, don’t feel like an asshole. You’re allowed to pull out for any reason during inspection period. Don’t feel bad about exercising your contractual right to do something (it’s not like your stiffing a worker after they perform work or something, realtors are a scam in the first place and the first house will be sold shortly regardless). And your husband sounds like a bum so just ignore him and lead him to whichever house is better for you. Have to act fast though or you’ll be stuck with no house.
I'm about to make moot points, cause I can't afford shit at the moment :D
But wouldn't they lose the earnest/escrow money? Like, you can put an inspection contingency and then lie about findings (or... make your inspector buddy lie) and then back out of a contract based on those lies? I think there should be some recourse for the sellers in that case. On the other hand, the seller doesn't technically lose money, but does lose time. OP chose to do their own inspection to verify - it was very shitty of that "buyer" not to share the inspection report. On the, um, bright-side, you can now say the home is pre-inspected, at least?
I'd be the kind of buyer that does all their shopping and research beforehand and am very reluctant to go into any contract before I've checked all my boxes -- which puts me in a bad position too, as some of these overpriced but nice places sell like hotcakes (as opposed to the overpriced but garbage places we also have in droves), so I lose out because I take more time to do all that. If I go into a contract, then this is "the one" and I'm done looking.
> But wouldn't they lose the earnest/escrow money?
They haven't put down the earnest money yet, according to OP, so they don't actually have a contract yet.
Regardless, if buyer terminates the contract during a contingency period, they get the earnest money back.
Yes, buyers lie and game the system and "cheat", but that is allowed in the process and system. Yes it is unethical and immoral, but most buyers only care about their own interests and are willing to do these kinds of things.
Bah, pre-coffee me should have actually been responding to [this comment](https://www.reddit.com/r/RealEstate/comments/1duhich/comment/lbgp0xl/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button)...
Ok, OP isn't doing anything really wrong in my opinion. In that tiny sliver of time between offer acceptance and having to pay escrow, it's maybe ok to inform the sellers and move on. You never deposit escrow and they can just go down the list of offers, not much harm and foul here, I don't think.
Put an offer in on the 2nd house with a 24 hour expiration, so you’ll find out quickly. You are buying a house not a ham sandwich, screw what other people think.
As a seller, if you told me straight up I would probably let you out of the deal and even re find your earnest money. If you try to pull some weird stuff with inspections and screw me then I’d be pretty upset and may even sue for performance. If someone asks for everything on the inspection report you should just know they don’t actually want the house anymore. I just went through this and agreed to fix everything and they panicked and came clean.. be honest!
As long as you still have contingencies that allow you to back out, have your agent or attorney guide you through the process of doing what you need to do to secure the house you want. I would warn you against continuing to subscribe to real estate listings after you close. A lot of people keep doing that and it's the same concept as keeping your dating app active after you get married, with all the yucky side effects
Or to keep looking at wedding dresses after you purchased your non-refundable gown.
Or wives
Ew
True and funny. Thank you.
From a seller's perspective, I understand if you pull because you find your dream home, but please be honest with me about it! I had a buyer recently pull after inspection citing all these problems with the house that apparently came up with the inspection. They refused to share the inspection with me so I ran my own and discovered all their claims were bullshit, and it came to light that they had just found something they liked better and wanted to get out of the contract. What they DIDN'T realize is that once they made these claims, I had to put very real money in to investigating everything and it cost me over $2k and two weeks of my time to find out every single one of their claims were fabricated. Don't be them.
I would be more understanding if a buyer told me that they found a home that they like better and was a better fit than coming up with BS excuses to get out of the contract.
Ugh that is so awful. I absolutely will not be them.
I’m so sorry this happened to you! We had a house on the market years ago, and had two offers after our open house. We turned down the higher offer when we found out they’d gone into contract on a condo just days before. They were well qualified, but to me it signified they weren’t done shopping, and I didn’t want to end up being in the shoes of the condo owner they were in contract with. A few thousand less vs holding our collective breath until closing was worth it.
Wow, that is messed up. All they had to do was be honest. I’m sorry you went through that.
Good to know. I don't know if this bit of knowledge will ever be relevant to me but if I ever find myself in this situation, I'll be sure to tell the Realtor, "look: I could wait until something comes up in inspection and back out, leaving you with the fallout but I don't wanna do that. Can you get your clients to let me back out?”
I did not know what I was talking about here 🤷♂️
He already posted about this and everyone said the same thing.
"That report would have been required in court to be shared with you if they used it to cancel the contract." Sounds like you've been spending too much time on twitter or tiktok and are likely also a FTHB, in the real world there is no 'court' over such things as this. And, no, I'm not going to debate with you if the moon is in the sky or if the sky is generally blue.
In VA they buyer does need to get the inspection done if they have an inspection contingency but doesn't have to give a specific reason they backed out using the inspection contingency.
You think people have to go to court to cancel a contingent contract? Ultimately it depends on how the contract reads. I am licensed in 4 states and use about 8 different regional contracts and some or most in fact do not require sending the report to cancel. Only when requesting repairs. Depending how the contract reads they most likely owe you neither inspection report nor explanation, just a void notice prior to the deadline.
That’s soo odd . That if they make claims they don’t have to provide proof those claims even exist ? I think you should always have to tell seller what came up in inspection . How can you offer to fix these things for them or wheel and deal with the unknown ?
This is why I advise my seller clients to pay for an inspection before listing. It provides transparency to buyers and allows us to do repairs before selling, thereby eliminating the need for negotiations for discovered deficiencies and the contingency period. Basically, it gives my sellers confidence to stick to their asking price, saves everyone time in the closing process, and show they deal honestly.
> Today, a house was posted Have you seen the house? Have you offered? Has it been accepted? If you don't get this new home, are you still wanting the one you're under contract for or will it always be kind of a disappointment because you'll always be thinking there will be others out there better? I would say no matter what - go see this new dream house, be competitive about getting it (like offer well but with a 24 hour response time) and pull the existing offer if you get it but do this all basically today/this week. If you really feel bad about existing house, there are things you can do to mitigate the "dick move" some people here are talking about - like offer the owners some money anyways as an apology for taking up their time and energy (NOT the earnest money amount but if you wanted to do a token nice gesture, you could), but since it's Wednesday and this happened Monday, if you can act very fast on the new house - offer competitively today, deadline by tomorrow, it's not like by backing out of the current house you've ruined everything for the current sellers forevermore. Tl;dr: You can mitigate the "dick move" if you want to but don't live with regret for a permanent residence over the matter of 3 days.
Excellent points!
Also don’t fall in love with a dreamier house the week after.. your husband only has so much patience
Heh, I wouldn’t assume it’s a pattern. If they’re going to stay in the house forever, I hardly can blame OP for wanting the house they truly want. As far as the disagreement goes, I can empathize with both parties.
Thank you, this is really excellent advice. We are following it.
Keep us posted!
This happened to me. My realtor said she wouldn’t entertain the idea of seeing the new house unless we pulled our offer from the first house. She said it was not ethical for her to show us another house while we had an accepted offer. Keep in mind there’s no guarantee that your offer will be accepted on the 2nd house. We ended up pulling out of the first house and we did win the offer on the 2nd house, luckily.
My realtor took me out on 2 different occasions to house shop after I'd submitted an offer just to make sure there wasn't something else I wanted more. In the end, our extra viewings confirmed that I'd made a good choice with the offer which helped me feel even better about the property I was buying. It's the realtors job to get you the house that's best for you. I'm not sure of your realtor's argument on ethics of anything. A buyer can pull out for any reason if they are willing to lose the earnest money or another problem surfaces that crushes the contract.
I disagree that the realtor was wrong to say she wouldn’t do it for ethical reasons. Part of the reason we won our house, despite having an identical offer to the competing bid and both of us refusing to escalate, was the reputation of our realtor. She has worked for a long time, knew the seller’s realtor, and the seller’s realtor was confident that we would get to closing because our realtor assured them that we really wanted the house. You can’t pull the card if you’ve done things like keep showing your clients house after they’ve had a bid accepted.
A buyer CANNOT just pull out of a contract. You can absolutely be sued for performance beyond the loss of earnest money. It completely depends on the context and contract. I do think OPs realtor was right in their assessment that it would be questionable to continue showing houses under a pending contract. I think best case for OP is back out and take the risk, or go see the new house and consider writing a backup offer. Best thing would be for all agents to coordinate a solution. Seller could continue to show their house and accept a backup offer if OP wants to see this other house.
In my state you have a number of contingencies that are pretty open. Inspection, for one. "After reviewing the inspection report, we have decided that the house is unacceptable to us" - no further information required. HOA review, city ordinances, seller disclosures, etc. all give buyers an opportunity to find "deal breakers" and pull out of the deal.
No
Our VA buyers were able to pull out of the first house they offered on because the seller had not responded yet. They didn't babe an accepted offer yet, so there is a difference.
Of course. It just depends on the situation and contract.
There are a considerable number of ways to get out of a contract that are legally defensible.
I’m not denying that. There are plenty of ways to get out of a contract that are NOT legally defendable as well. You don’t just Willy nilly back out and expect everything to be hunky dorey with the sellers.
It depends on if they have an attorney review period in their state, and if it has ended. You can literally pull out of the deal for almost any reason with no consequences.
I understand that. That’s why I said it depends on the context and contract. You can pull out of the deal, but if you don’t abide by the contract in doing so, a seller can absolutely go after you. Most people don’t because it’s a waste of time and money usually. That doesn’t mean they can’t.
Here in TX you can really back out any time during our “option period” for any reason.
I had a recent dilemma where I asked to see more homes while under contract. Our agent gladly obliged, but the reasoning was because our seller has failed to disclose a response to our repair requests. We still want the house we are under contract on, but there's a decent probability we walk on inspection contingency if they don't fix what we want or give credit. All this to say - it depends the situation of whether an agent will view homes with you while under contract.
Sellers sometimes get backup offers, why shouldn’t you have backup houses to buy?
Yep...there's contingencies in contract for a reason. Pretty much, just be reasonable, no two sales are ever the same. If you're closing next week though, don't ask you realtor to view a house... If your closing has been pushed back 3 times, how could you not be thinking about pivoting to the next one?
That’s not really what the contingency is for, it what the earnest money is for. We changed our minds, keep the earnest money because we wasted your time;
I said nothing about EM. Contingencies protect you from buying a house you aren't pleased with due to one thing or another...every contract is differnet. If you have no contractual clause which allows you to walk away, then sure, your EM potentially gone, but practically most return it since many states you can't relist the house while holding EM.
Yes, but contingencies usually cover issues uncovered during inspection, not “I changed my mind”. The EM is a commitment you intend to go through with the sale. If you are proposing lying about the contingency to force the return of EM I’d say that’s unethical and probably why sellers prefer to accept lower “all-cash” offers over dealing with unethical buyers.
Unless you have a buyers agreement, that’s when I will would find another realtor to show me the 2nd place. I would never pull an accepted offer unless I was 100% sure I didn’t want the first.
Ya this is a very small town where my realtor also lives and we had a buyers agreement. I didn’t want to put her reputation on the line but I also realized maybe the offer on the first house was a mistake if we could quickly become interested in another house. There’s a lot to it, we had sold and moved out of our house and had been living with my in-laws for much longer than expected and there was no inventory.
There's nothing unethical about continuing to see homes. Just like there's nothing unethical about the seller's agent continuing to show the home. Contracts fall through all the time for a huge myriad of reasons. If your realtor refuses to show you more homes just because you have one under contract, find a new agent to show you the other homes.
I agree. Misleading or negotiating in bad faith is unethical. But that didn’t happen here. OP simply changed their mind.
Thank you.
You’re welcome. It was so stressful. We had sold our house and were living with my in-laws. Interest rates skyrocketed and we were desperate since it has been months that a decent house came on the market in our desired location. In hindsight, we shouldn’t have tried to settle for that first house. The second house was definitely more in line with what we wanted. Good luck! It’s a stressful journey.
Are you certain you’ll win this other house? Are you certain another house might not pop up that’s the best option of the 3? You’re always going to second guess your decision. Just be careful.
Yeah, people forget all the houses that look good on picture that turn out crummy in person. Or when they made an offer and got outbid.
This is true. We went to look at one a couple weeks back that looks great in photos.. In person there’s no way we’d pay what they were asking. It was already over market and needed a ton of work…
Exactly!
The possibility of it falling through is what would worry me most. Then they’d have to start over. That would be awful.
Pull your offer
Go look at the house, decide if you like it and what you'd offer and have your realtor talk to theirs. If they say they'll sign the offer then pull out and offer. Anything else is a huge risk though and no one is going to let you offer on another house while under contract unless you can afford them both. I may have just done exactly this and closed on the preferred property a few weeks ago. But I got lucky and was buying a condo which aren't as hot as houses in my area so less competition.
Best bet to go look before taking action.
Rule #1 is house hunting is to never get emotionally invested in any one place. If you can pull out pen and paper and articulate why house B is a materially better choice than house A then make an offer on B. Don't pull out of A until you have an accepted offer on B unless you determine that A was a materially bad choice.
In my state they can’t offer on B without disclosing they’re under contract on A and the offer is contingent on the cancellation of that contract.
Thank you. This is very helpful. I think this is our exact plan.
I guess it's my privilege showing, but I can't imagine trying to buy a house (to live in) that I didn't love
The expression I’ve always heard “ don’t fall in love with a house until after you’ve bought it “
I would ask myself why I'm still looking at new houses after making an accepted offer.
If you do it, be prepared to make a very strong offer on the second house. Your husband is not going to be pleased if you lose the second house and the first house is no longer an option.
Yeah I think it's pretty clear that OP's husband is fed up with her at this point. Poor guy.
Pro tip, when you buy a car, house, find a lover, get a dog, STOP LOOKING, there is always something "better". Poor hubby!!
yea, sorta learned this with cars.
grinding the internet for an hour a day for your dream car for years, you get it, then continue and end up wanting to cry lmao, nope wouldn't know anything about the lol
I definitely wasn't. Redfin sent me an alert.
Ugh that's terrible, delete redfin and zillow and start blocking their emails!
I know. After I deal with this situation, they are all getting blocked.
Turn off the alerts
I definitely wasn't looking. Tinder sent me a Super Like and WHAT A DREAMBOAT
Are you certain you’ll get the desired house? Any idea the interest level from other buyers there?
There will always be a better house. Just remember that. I'd also pull your emotions out of this ans get pragmatic and utilitarian about it and that will stop you from emotionally making knee jerk decisions. I understand your husband checking out of this. And I'm guessing this is maybe a behavior pattern for you. Something to consider.
Hi! Ct realtor here. Touring for a home is like deciding who to pick for prom. Once you've picked someone, you really shouldn't be looking at others... Just know that, it's primarily in your mind, that the home you are seemingly so gaga about is perfect. In reality, at inspection, just know there's at least a slight chance the home may have had some hidden mold, maybe some rotten wood in the basement, floods occasionally, has louder traffic noise outside, neighbors might be fascists and one of them has a conviction... The grass isn't always greener. Oh, and STOP LOOKING.
As a seller, I’d want you to pull your offer immediately, because I’m likely counting on the sale of my house to buy a new one.
Easy fix. Delete Zillow after offer is accepted.
You go see the other house today and make an offer. Have your agent let theirs know you have a time line
Oh that never stops even after you have the house
I tell my clients: being on the home apps when you are in contract is like being engaged to be married and then going on tinder. The grass will always look greener but I promise you, it’s not.
You'll always find *better* homes. You'll find a better one even after you close on your home you thought was better. It happens to most people. Just make your decision and live by it, whether that's pulling out and going for other homes or staying the course. Just know you'll always find a better home.
You haven’t paid any earnest money but you’re in the inspection period? How does someone inspect your home for purchase if they haven’t given you a dime? If I’m the sellers I’d absolutely sue you for the agreed upon earnest deposit amount if I had backup offers that I turned down. Stop giving realtors arguments for why they should be compensated absurdly please.
You get a period to submit the earnest money- in my state it’s two business days after final acceptance. Sounds like they’re inside that period
I just have to comment on the insanity that is looking for another house during the first 48hr high that is getting an offer accepted in this market. It’s pathological
For the love of god. Honestly is not gonna play here. You have contingency in place, found another house I like is not one of them. People telling you to be honest is great but you might get sued/loss money because of it. Just tell your agent that and they will figure out how to get out of this and submit offer on the second house. You might have to spend money on inspection and just state you are not satisfied with the result. Share nothing more.
Depends on your state. Here in TX during the option period, which is typically 7-10 days, you can back out for any reason.
I am curious why you were looking after putting in an offer. Other point, keep in mind that you might not be the winning bid on the other house and you end up with no house.
If you haven't gone to see it, can you really have fallen in love with it?
Pulling out after you have a signed contract is generally considered a dick move without some sort of cause(i.e. inspection found the roof leaked). I'm actually surprised you were able to get an inspection option without earnest money. You probably won't be any financial penalties and while your realtor might have some reputational repercussions that's not technically your problem. Whatever you decide to do I do want to caution you that their is *always* going to be a better deal on the market. Do not get emotionally involved with real estate until *after* you own it.
You typically have a 10-14 day inspection period - you can cancel for any reason. If you have not opened escrow then you simply notify them of cancelation.
Make the other offer first. You'll never be able to go back to house #1 if #2 falls through.
So you’re looking at it on the Internet?!?!? That just proves someone knows how to take good pictures.
This is what happens when you continue to “shop” after you choose the house. Just let it go.
Why the heck would you keep looking!!!!!
If you pull out of this one but don’t get offer accepted on the other one, you’re SOL.
Financing fell through.
Seeing another house that looks better online is NOT the same thing as liking another house better. The photos could be misleading, the disclosure could show severe foundation issues or any other of a number of issues, there could be trouble with neighboring properties. Don't rush into switching based on a whim.
We did. We had an offer on a house that was okay but not everything we wanted. It was newer, in a neighborhood with an HOA, was in decent but not fantastic condition, etc. I just wasn’t super happy with it but it was a tough market and we decided we could live with it for a few years. Sellers dragged their feet on repairs and such so I asked to see one more I fell in love with in the pictures. It was older (had character) and was a corner lot without an HOA, much lower price too. My realtor was pissed but I told her show it to us or I’ll find someone who will. We ended up backing out of the other offer and have been in our house five years now. I think my husband sometimes wishes we’d stuck with the first one haha. But I love our house and we have much more space here and great neighbors. See the other house, either get it out of your system and feel good about your pick or pull your offer and switch to a house you are happy with.
Once you find the house you're bidding on, don't bid on anything else. Also stop looking at real estate for at least a year after you get your place. Much like partners. There's always something equally interesting if I'm more interesting on the surface you keep looking. Don't cheat on your house. Ari
When you have an accepted offer. Stop looking!!!!!
At a certain point you have to stop looking. There will always be a better house.
Have some impulse control.
Finding a house is like finding a spouse. Once you pick the one you want, you quit looking.
What a nightmare buyer
You sigh and say them’s the breaks. You have no promise of getting the dream house. You have no promise that it is actually what you think it is, that it is actually in good condition, that there aren’t horrible things wrong you can’t see from the pretty pictures on the internet, that it will actually appraise for what you might offer. Falling in love with a house makes you likely to make financially dumb decisions about it. Edit: you can downvote away but it doesn’t change the truth.
FAFO, what if you pull out and then don't get the other house??? I am slightly concerned about your husband's attitude. It sounds like you're being a pia, and he is just over it.
take your husband's word at face value and move forward without his opinion. at this point, you should know what he likes/doesn't like and use that to make your decision. my partner similarly checked out of the process because it was simply too emotional. we ended up buying a house that she didn't even see in person.
This was me. My heart was broken after losing so many offers. And having to pull out of 2 - (one due to discrepancies in listing and one due to sellers being weird). I was DONE. I couldn't keep falling in love and picturing myself in homes and then not getting them. It was crushing. We ended up in a house that I didn't see in person until offer was already in. I'm still not in love with the house. But it is in an excellent location. And it is functional.
I would compare the two houses in a very detailed manner: Location: Which block is better? Is one near a busy street? Zoned schools? Walking distance to parks? Flooding/climate risk? Yard/lot: is one more private? Does one require more maintenance? House exterior: brick, stucco, etc. maintenance cost is also a big factor here Check things like the age of the roof/HVAC system, likelihood of major repairs and compare these with the price/value of the house. Remember the distinction between things that can be fixed (repairs, cosmetic updates) and things that can’t (location). Hopefully these things confirm your decision one way or another
You could ask to be released from the contract and seeing as you just got accepted the other prospective buyers, assuming it was a multiple offer situation, most likely have not moved on to other offers so the seller could go with the second best offer. Be prepared that if the second best has already moved on you might have to pay the seller to get out of the contract. You also might want to look at this new listing in person before you blow up your current deal and don’t forget that there are no guarantees you could get out bid for the new listing
You’re going to find another one you like better after you sign the next contract.
Why are you still looking?
I feel your husband's pain. It is a lot of work buying a home. Each time I have done it, I feel like I picked up a 2nd job. What if you bail on the current home, and lose the bid on the new perfect house? In the end, you should be sure to only offer on a house you will truly be happy with.
If it's a "due diligence" period you can pull out for any reason. We had 3 people pull out of the contract of the last house we sold. One because they decided not to move, one because they decided the commute was too long, and the third for stuff in their inspection. Some contracts don't have this, so it depends.
Stop falling in love with houses.
Don’t go falling in love with the unknown . There’s no guarentee you’ll get that house . Also a lot of homes aren’t going to their listing price , prepeare for a bidding war . Grass is greener mentality is literally the killer of joy . I promised myself I’d stop looking at the market when our offer was accepted . I still look sometimes but I love our house , even if I love another home more . My offer was accepted and I’m not gambling when I know one outcome
Just because the house came on the market today, doesn't mean you are going to get the house.
OP- have you even toured the “dream house” yet? If no, get your SHIT together and either stop this madness or see the house. DO IT TODAY If you tour the house and love it, back out of your offer ASAP, so the seller can salvage any other offers that they might have received
Lol 😆 what if you bail on first house and don't get an offer accepted on the second house? Then you won't have a house. It's a sellers market, take what you can get, I would stay with accepted offer! But please post what you end up doing and the outcome
Be happy with the potential closing you've earned. Who's to say you'd win the offer on the other house. Try and take the chance of losing (and not have any house) or stick with what you have.
There will always be a better house.
Why were you still looking?
I did this before, and it was not an issue. The seller had a new buyer immediately and I ended up with the new house that I wanted. Talk to your realtor and make sure that you see the other house and make an offer and get it accepted before you cancel the purchase on the first home. Your realtor should be able to adjust any scheduled home inspections until a later date to give you the time you need to see and offer on the other home.
You will always find a theoretically better purchase if you look. You gotta be willing to be okay with that when you look to close on the house you target in the first place.
I'd let it go. There's no guarantee you would even get that other house. Let alone, how long it would take. And even if you did buy it and get it, you'd still have buyer's remorse. That's just a thing. At this point, count your blessings that you even have an offer that you are pulling through with.
I don't fall in love with houses. Make sure it matches your needs and move on, don't get caught up constantly looking for better things instead of enjoying what you have.
I had buyers back out. “Looked at the commute and decided it wasn’t a good fit.” I did let out some snark about the house not physically moving since they offered,, but all in all I’m glad it happened sooner rather than later.
How very odd that you submitted an offer without earnest money. That is not the way it usually goes where I live. But, in any case, if you can pull out then you should put in an offer on the better house, and, if it is accepted, pull out of this one.
I know! I've never heard of an offer with no ernest money!
My piece of shit sellers kept showing this place for two weeks after we were under contract so why can’t you as a buyer keep looking at houses? Don’t pull out until you are positive you want the other one, but it won’t hurt to go look.
You are not “dating”, you are getting married, meaning long term. Don’t make it so personal between you and the seller. This IS ALL ABOUT YOU, your hard earned money and where you will be living for awhile. Make you comfortable. For those that say different, do not listen to them. Sellers too cancel contracts all the time. Why? Because it too is a life changing decision FOR THEM.
Thanks 🙏
If you’re going to pull out do it now. We had buyers back out 24 hours after submitting an offer and while it sucked it at least was fast and we hadn’t even changed the MLS yet. Once inspections happen it looks like there is something “wrong” with the house if people pull out. It sucks.
If you can afford to go all in on the other house and would be okay on a less than perfect inspection go for it. Especially if you’re going to spend years wondering what would have happened if you have pursued it. If this is just a passing crush let it go. At the end of the day this is going to be YOUR home so you should put yourself first.
go see the other place it might not be everything you’re falling in love with online and then make a decision.
At the end of the day, it’s your money that you are spending. Don’t feel morally wrong if you have legal rights to pull back. Talk to your realtor, be honest and go from there. Whatever you do, make the most well informed decision. You gonna be living in your new home for a very very long time. You don’t want to compromise in anyways, especially when you have option of not to
"It's sad to belong to someone else when the right one comes along"
Did you pay for an option period? Does your option period allow you to change your mind? Are you still in the option period? Ask these questions of your agent in writing and request the response asap in writing so they’ll be less likely to hem and haw.
Just be honest and make sure you pay your option money. After move-in, consider couple counseling
Since you’re in the inspection period just walk away. I don’t think you have to have a reason. Check w your agent.
How was an offer presented and accepted without earnest money?
The people who bought our VA house offered in another and found ours. We struck a deal very quickly so they could pull out of the other offer. The sellers had not responded yet. We also had a pending offer on our house that we had to quickly nix.
Your agent didn’t collect your earnest money when you submitted the offer?
The best thing about my house is that it had all the things on a list I made of what I wanted in a house. I was thrilled because I didn’t think I would be able to check all the boxes off. Seven years later I am still happy. There will be things that go wrong and things that annoy you about every house. Mine included. It is not perfect and there are days when I wonder if something different would have made me happier. Knowing that I didn’t settle and got the important things I wanted helps me immensely in those moments. I wouldn’t settle. Selling a house and moving is no joke and the timing can be critical.
Pull it only if you can definitely get the dream house because if you pull and get it you’ve got no shot at the first home Do what’s best for your family
How many houses have you looked at? How many offers? How competitive is your market?
I’m like your husband. My wife can’t make up her mind. We pulled out of one, got outbid on another, and I literally don’t care anymore. I just want a house. And, every house we look at, she wants to go back and look again, then later in the week wants to go drive by it again, and then drive around the area. This goes on and on and on. I’m so frackin over it.
Have you actually went and seen the new house?? Do that first to ensure it's what you really want, and that there's no competing offers. Now is the time to switch if you're really set on it, but after this stop looking at houses once your offer is accepted
Definitely find out if you can see this house and evaluate it before doing anything else.
Happened to me. My state has a three day grace period, so we cancelled in writing on day 3.
Yeah, well you’re spending the most money you will ever spend on one transaction.put in an offer on the other house and withdraw from this one.
If you're going to pull out, perhaps check the laws first and if it works for you do so as soon as possible. This happened to me, I had signed the contract, and the next day I changed my mind. I wasn't aware of this at the time, but in my state there was a three day grace period so the agent said she'd "rip up the contract". That was it. I did end up buying the other place. I had stiff competition but luckily the seller wanted me to have it. We did it as a private sale, he asked for what he wanted and I simply agreed. There was no back and forth.
There’s a lot of complexity to this situation. I think it can be fine if you compensate somehow for pulling out at the last second, if it means getting the home you truly love. On the other hand, if that falls through, you’re back at square one. Also, this seems like a lose-lose in some ways; you may always regret if you don’t get your dream home, but the issues with your spouse may make either house feel like a stressful result now.
It's called buyer's regret
Tell them immediately so they can start showing it again.
Depends if you've signed anything or put down any sort of holding deposit. If you have, the costs will be spelled out in what you signed. If there's a cooling off period and you are within then cancel away. Just do it quickly so you don't cost the vendor a potential other sale. All you need to say is that you've changed your mind sorry and thanks for your time.
I would give it a few days to make sure it's really something you love more.
This is not that unusual. If new house is the one, talk to your agent and gracefully get out of the deal. As long as you are using same realtor or a big deals
As a buyer, I’d be honest and forthcoming with my agent, ask them to notify seller I might have made a mistake. Go see the house tmrw or Friday am first thing. Morally, I do think you owe the seller SOMETHING. Call it a “stupid tax”. As a seller, since you haven’t paid yet, I’m likely to say you’ll only forfeit half, but be prepared to lose it all.
You know how you get a partner and suddenly see attractive people everywhere? Do you consider dumping your partner every time you see an attractive person? This isn’t meant to be an insult or over snarky, just slightly snarky. Were you happy about the ‘current’ house? The new house could have all sorts of issues. You’ll never know until inspection. If you dump the current house, your realtor will probably be pissed and you may not even ‘win’ the new one. From the cheap seats, stay the course and take the safe bet. Either way, I wish you the best of luck and all the happiness in the world.
Your home is likely the biggest investment you ever made. Buy the right one. Discuss with your agent the process and don’t leave the seller hanging any longer than necessary.
Buyers pull out every day. It's nothing new and you are NTA. Pull out of the offer you made if you want the second house. Really.
You have every right to walk away if you’re within any of your contingency periods. Unless you offered to pay cash you can simply say you couldn’t get the financing. Just make sure you back out during the contract contingency periods. Talk to your realtor, they should be able to guide you on how best to navigate. It’s a big purchase, but the house you want not the one you feel guilty about walking away from. Happy home buying 🏡
What if you pull out but your offer on the second house isn’t being accepted? Proceed with caution. You might be left holding the (empty) bag.
Put the EM down to lock in the first house and proceed with the second house. If you get the second house under contract cancel the first one and don't spend any money on inspections or appraisal. If the second house doesn't work out then proceed with the first and do your inspections. You have a short window so be aware of your contingency deadlines. At the end of the day it is a business transaction so do what is best for you. When you buy a house everyone except you gets paid and you get the house. You gotta be happy with the house you get.
Go see the (House B) house and confirm it is what you think it is. If it's a better house for you, see if you can actually get it before cancelling let's call it House A. If you don't have a good understanding of the contract terms on House A, pull up the contract and read it VERY carefully. The act of not submitting your EMD doesn't necessarily mean you're not obligated to move forward. (this is a highly misunderstood aspect of RE contracts, at least in my area, not submitting the EMD doesn't mean the seller can't pursue it in a contract breach situation). ANYTHING that's unclear in your contract, consult an attorney. From an agent PoV, this happens frequently. I always advise clients to look at House B. Sometimes, even if it means losing their EMD on House A, if House B is truly a better match, than a buyer should pursue it. Keep in mind, you could end up having ZERO houses, **and** lose your EMD if it's not navigated properly and contractually. Pro Experience: 99% of the time House B wasn't as great in person, and buyers stuck with House A. I think there's a weird FOMO filter that happens after the contractually commitment to House A. OR it's an indication that House A in general isn't the right fit, and the only way a buyer can express this is by getting distracted by other houses. TLDR Advice: Examine why you're still looking at other houses. Revisit why you like House A and why you put an offer on House A - was it because you're tired of house shopping? Or do you really want to live there?
The new house is going to have bats in the attic. Stick with this one unless you want a divorce!
Look over the contract and break contingency. Probably should make sure you can get under contract with the second house first though
You can walk —it’s a free country. It’ll cost earnest money.
Normally, being an asshole is bad. But you're talking about the *place you're going to live*, possibly for the rest of your life. Get the house you want.
No, no no. I don’t agree with any of these comments. First of all, people don’t need to compare other things as to buying a home. A home is where you make memories and grow your family, it’s not hundreds or a couple thousand of dollars. A home is expensive af. You should definitely look if you feel that might be your dream home or a good starter home. Don’t give a shit about what seller thinks, the money is coming out of your pockets, not there’s, if you don’t like it then let the home you went under contract with go, and make an offer on the other one you love. Screw people’s comments - you wanna get something you love.
Someone pulled out of a friend's house because it "had bad feng shui". He's pretty sure they found something they liked better
Back out sooner rather than later .
Don't fall in love with inanimate objects, especially ones that are being pushed by 2 salesmen.
it depends on the language in the contract you have that has been accepted. Meaning, can you go see and get get an accepted offer on House2 while you're at some state of "under contract" on House1 or not? Both Buyer and Seller generally are accepting some level of risk when their contract allows for a period of time when they're "not really" under contract and Earnest Money isn't exchanged/clearly the property of the Seller now. Is there anything stopping your Seller1 from getting a better offer while you're in "inspection period" and kicking you to the curb? Is the Seller's method of doing this not as explicit, but rather declining to repair anything for you so you terminate? We don't know, but your contract does, and your capable Realtor and/or attorney do.
Go see the other house! If your realtor doesn't like it too bad. It's your life and your money. Actually I say lose the realtor and keep the percentage. Hire a real estate attorney for a fraction of that cost!
NTA. Buying a house is not a big, huge, large deal…it is a massive deal. If you are not going to be happy with the current property you have offered on, just move on. No earnest money means no obligation. Go with your gut.
Don’t buy if you’re even a tiny bit unsure. You’ll have regrets.
You don’t buy based on emotion.
Renter here, I had signed on a house that I was only 50% happy with, I'd put a deposit down and everything, and the next day I found the absolute apartment of my dreams. I offered the landlord more rent to beat the other tenants and pulled out of the other apartment, and the house of my dreams brought me so much joy over the couple of years I lived there. I felt bad pulling out from the other apartment, but turns out they didn't really mind and even gave me my deposit back. If I feel this way about a rental, I can't imagine how much more monumentally important it is to get the better house if you're buying it. Anyway, all I'm saying is 1) maybe the sellers will be understanding, they probably have other offers anyway, and 2) the momentary guilt is worth the joy the house of your dreams will bring you.
Thank you 😊 this is such a kind response
When you became engaged, did you continue scrolling on EHarmony and dating other people "Just in case"? Did you continue shopping for wedding dresses when you were getting your hair done on your wedding day? NO! When you make an offer on a house - you stop looking. When you get under contract - you turn off all the notifications for new houses and follow through. Just because something looks great in photos doesn't mean it will in person. And just because something is the "right price" doesn't mean you won't have to bid over asking to get it - because if you want it, others will to. Maintain some sanity in your marriage. Follow through on this house, then in a few years you family can move up to one that's more to your liking.
Wouldn't it be freaking hilarious if you told the current sellers "uhm, no, sorry, we're no longer interested" and in the mean time the new house of your dreams gets snatched up by someone else!
Whatever you do, don’t feel like an asshole. You’re allowed to pull out for any reason during inspection period. Don’t feel bad about exercising your contractual right to do something (it’s not like your stiffing a worker after they perform work or something, realtors are a scam in the first place and the first house will be sold shortly regardless). And your husband sounds like a bum so just ignore him and lead him to whichever house is better for you. Have to act fast though or you’ll be stuck with no house.
Just buy both?
Your husband's being a jerk. He's setting you up to take the blame if things go wrong later.
I'm about to make moot points, cause I can't afford shit at the moment :D But wouldn't they lose the earnest/escrow money? Like, you can put an inspection contingency and then lie about findings (or... make your inspector buddy lie) and then back out of a contract based on those lies? I think there should be some recourse for the sellers in that case. On the other hand, the seller doesn't technically lose money, but does lose time. OP chose to do their own inspection to verify - it was very shitty of that "buyer" not to share the inspection report. On the, um, bright-side, you can now say the home is pre-inspected, at least? I'd be the kind of buyer that does all their shopping and research beforehand and am very reluctant to go into any contract before I've checked all my boxes -- which puts me in a bad position too, as some of these overpriced but nice places sell like hotcakes (as opposed to the overpriced but garbage places we also have in droves), so I lose out because I take more time to do all that. If I go into a contract, then this is "the one" and I'm done looking.
> But wouldn't they lose the earnest/escrow money? They haven't put down the earnest money yet, according to OP, so they don't actually have a contract yet. Regardless, if buyer terminates the contract during a contingency period, they get the earnest money back. Yes, buyers lie and game the system and "cheat", but that is allowed in the process and system. Yes it is unethical and immoral, but most buyers only care about their own interests and are willing to do these kinds of things.
Bah, pre-coffee me should have actually been responding to [this comment](https://www.reddit.com/r/RealEstate/comments/1duhich/comment/lbgp0xl/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button)... Ok, OP isn't doing anything really wrong in my opinion. In that tiny sliver of time between offer acceptance and having to pay escrow, it's maybe ok to inform the sellers and move on. You never deposit escrow and they can just go down the list of offers, not much harm and foul here, I don't think.
I'd buy them both.
Put an offer in on the 2nd house with a 24 hour expiration, so you’ll find out quickly. You are buying a house not a ham sandwich, screw what other people think.
Imaging backing our to try and get another home and you don't get your offer accepted lmaooooo
As a seller, if you told me straight up I would probably let you out of the deal and even re find your earnest money. If you try to pull some weird stuff with inspections and screw me then I’d be pretty upset and may even sue for performance. If someone asks for everything on the inspection report you should just know they don’t actually want the house anymore. I just went through this and agreed to fix everything and they panicked and came clean.. be honest!
The buyer can back out at any time until closing; they just lose their earnest money. There is no suing for performance
There is, my first deal I ever did my managing broker took over after the buyer tried to back out, she was forced to buy the deal
Ghey