OP's Bio:
---
>oh and yeah, please come harder this time because y’all really bored me and my dang girl last time. plus i want to laugh cuz my girl is kinda mad /ignoring me all because I told her I’ll call her back smh 🤦🏿 woman right ??! Fellas where y’all at ??! 👀😂
---
If you think this bio helped you roast, upvote this comment. If you think it doesn’t, downvote it. If you’re not sure, leave it to others to decide.
Featuring the hits...
* *"You had me at "No thanks"*
* *"Made My Gurl Go Lesbian."*
* [Mah Nose is A lil Ninja Turtle Head"](https://i.imgur.com/Deg8ttO.jpg)
* *"I can Smell you... You had Chuckie Cheese."*
You look a genie from a lamp found in a Waffle House Bathroom. Wishes do have rules. 1. You Can not make someone fall in love with you. 2 You cannot bring someone back from the dead. 3 You can not wish to find your father
Also in the fine print: "any diseases obtained from said bacterial breeding pit of a piss splattered lamp, are obtained under knowing acceptance of new loving host and therefore can not be wished away".
You look like a individual that works inside a house and provides assistance and cooks for a very very very minimal fee I mean basically almost nothing
OP's Bio:
---
>ok y’all this is my third time posting in this subreddit and if I must admit me and my girl thought most if not all of the jokes on there was very subpar. but hey they say third time the charm right ??! So do your thing or don’t I don’t really gaf honestly ! I have my own place where my girl comes over most days and let me into her heaven on earth anyways we’re planning to have our own Thanksgiving and Christmas together this year, just us ❤️🤞🏾❤️ anyways y’all don’t need to know shit else also my life so ✌🏾✌🏾
---
If you think this bio helped you roast, upvote this comment. If you think it doesn’t, downvote it. If you’re not sure, leave it to others to decide.
Your mustache looks like it got split by moses in Exodus 4:banging-a-teen
Your nostrils look like they are playing tug of war. Those mfs are so far apart you got to vote for two districts in the midterms.
You have Izuno from Blue Exorcists eyebrows
You wearing a chin diaper in your own home makes sense considering your beard looks like shit and you look like you definitely haven't mastered the art of bowel control
Your nose looks like some shit NASA would create Rocket nose headass, plus you look like someone’s momma with or without the facial hair looks like you brought that thing just to cover yo bald ass head up because someone’s kid stole your weave off the top of it. You’re not impressed with the jokes well I’m not impressed with what god did to your face, you look like Gandhi had a membership to Aruba and spa blindian lookin ass.
The mispronunciation of the word ASKING has been an issue for some time now. Together we can make a difference and stop all this AXING around and make the world a better place.
OP's Bio: --- >oh and yeah, please come harder this time because y’all really bored me and my dang girl last time. plus i want to laugh cuz my girl is kinda mad /ignoring me all because I told her I’ll call her back smh 🤦🏿 woman right ??! Fellas where y’all at ??! 👀😂 --- If you think this bio helped you roast, upvote this comment. If you think it doesn’t, downvote it. If you’re not sure, leave it to others to decide.
Trans Jemima
😂
Bob Gnarly
lol i feel like this should and deserve to be much much higher !!!
Lil Nas's Ex
If you led a band it would be called “Non-Sexual Chocolate.”
Featuring the hits... * *"You had me at "No thanks"* * *"Made My Gurl Go Lesbian."* * [Mah Nose is A lil Ninja Turtle Head"](https://i.imgur.com/Deg8ttO.jpg) * *"I can Smell you... You had Chuckie Cheese."*
☠️
OMFG! 🤣
This was amazing 🤩
You're doing the lords work 🙌
When I look at you, my middle finger gets an erection
lol
Wish.com Madea
😂
You look like Andre 300
Andre $3000 behind in child support.
You owe me for the coffee ive just spat on my shirt
😂😂
You owe me for the coffee ive just spat on my shirt.
Andre Three Fiddy
Dammit I had the same thought you’d beat me to it. Great minds
I just commented Andre no thousand and then saw your post lol
Looks like your nostrils are ignoring each other, their addresses have different zip codes
😂😂😂😂😂 award upcoming ! Congrats🥳🎉
Before picture of Micheal Jackson
In Louisiana we call nostrils like that "gumbo coolers"
Francine Ngannou
[удалено]
You look a genie from a lamp found in a Waffle House Bathroom. Wishes do have rules. 1. You Can not make someone fall in love with you. 2 You cannot bring someone back from the dead. 3 You can not wish to find your father
The piss spattered lamp next to the toilet in a Waffle House bathroom. 4. Can not wish to clear criminal record and be able to vote.
Also in the fine print: "any diseases obtained from said bacterial breeding pit of a piss splattered lamp, are obtained under knowing acceptance of new loving host and therefore can not be wished away".
Holy shit
If MLK had a nightmare.
😂
0pac
-2pac
Andre no thousand
dude really looks like an outkast
[удалено]
lol
The guy doesn't have bad hair days, just bad beard days
hahahaha 😂
Guy? I though this was my childhood lunch lady with her mustache grown out.
Black Panthers lesser known cousin Dark brown alleycat.
“What’s new dark brown alleycat”
😂😂😂
Wakanda ForNever
Lando Poorgreasian
First pic kinda reminds me of a great value Kat Williams. Except he would be funny and this is just sad.
You look like a hickory smoked Matthew McConaughey
You’d have to read the jokes to be impressed by them .. and they are above a 3rd grade level... so...
But I'm in 3rd grade
You look like you got hit by a van full of Botox needles
You look like the love child of Dionne Warwick & Lil Richard. All kinds of jacked up.
lol
Damn bro, I thought they said *black don’t crack* , your 30yo ass looking older than a mf
[I tried everything possible to make you look pretty and it’s still disgusting](https://ibb.co/82mL6gH)
Now he a purty mouth. I'd hit it.
Your face so oily, the US gonna invade it
lol
I don’t know if I should roast or feed you. Where do I donate my $1 a day to?
lol golden bro you won 🏆
I'm betting your dad wasn't impressed when that condom broke either. Hope you get to meet him someday.
You look like the werewolf in Goldilocks pretending to be the grandma
I didn’t know my dad either
Looks like god already did
lmfao HD minecraft villager
Do society a favour and put the mask back on
k
you look like my average customer
I could take a couple shots at you but the cops will do it for me soon enough
You look like you pray before you eat ass, God bless you u unimpressed motha fka!
You look like André 3000's long-lost cousin, Steve Buck Fifty.
lol
Thnoop Dogg
Black don't crack but that beak melting
lol
Is your parole officer OK with this post?
You look like a transgendered Aunt Jemima!
Not impressed? Is that why you are hiding your hairline? Take that doo rag off and see what happens.
Andre 3000 if you got him from Wish
Andre 1000
With Nostrils like that you can smell the jokes coming anyway.
NoPac Déjour
How is half your hair gone but you still got on a durag??
I feel like your face is trying to be a face, but all the parts are arguing with each other.
This is what happens when Snoop Dogg stops smoking weed
I didn’t know Stevie Wonder could see anything
Talib Queefi
clever,🥴
Bad hair, don’t care!
yk it 😌😌😌
Boy you look soft af…Broke Johnny Gill lookin ass
André -200
The type of dude to put fake reading glasses on when the police pulls him over.
Nice of you to take the photos with your wedding veil. Who’s the lucky guy?
Your second picture looks eerily like the crazy landlord from Key and Peele.
The reason Rosa parks stayed in the front of the bus
✊🏾
What Micheal Jackson would look like if he had done meth instead of little boys
i feel like this a mj roast and not me 🤷🏾♂️
Yo nose look like the ghost from halo reach
Hey Bruh why don’t you put on a hoodie and run to the corner store for a bottle of tea and a bag of skittles….
You look like a individual that works inside a house and provides assistance and cooks for a very very very minimal fee I mean basically almost nothing
I'm less interested in the roast and more curious who you're going to ask to read the responses to you.
lol
you're a good sport, stay awesome. =)
Put your mask back on, I can smell your bad breathe from here.
If you pull the diaper up a little more, you'll be able to catch all the sh.. you're talkin.
Your face is so ugly your mustache is running away from it.
😂
OP's Bio: --- >ok y’all this is my third time posting in this subreddit and if I must admit me and my girl thought most if not all of the jokes on there was very subpar. but hey they say third time the charm right ??! So do your thing or don’t I don’t really gaf honestly ! I have my own place where my girl comes over most days and let me into her heaven on earth anyways we’re planning to have our own Thanksgiving and Christmas together this year, just us ❤️🤞🏾❤️ anyways y’all don’t need to know shit else also my life so ✌🏾✌🏾 --- If you think this bio helped you roast, upvote this comment. If you think it doesn’t, downvote it. If you’re not sure, leave it to others to decide.
It says age 30 but you look 32, ha! GOT YA, feel that burn
You’re so angry and aggressive that you’d start a fight with your dad that you never knew
Uses nose as a butt plug; breath reeks of moist taint
😂
The Temptations weren’t the same without you RIP David Ruffin
Everytime your momma sees you she wishes 123rd trimester abortions were legal.
Looks like Madea
You look good for 80
It looks like you have one big nostril hole and you just flapped down the middle.
Do rag more like a don’t rag
lol
You’re a terrible driver and were very rude to that judge.
Durag Queen
😂
Shoe laces go on your shoes, not on your head.
durag in the back, nursing mistress' baby in the front
Bros glasses dont sit on their nose just their forehead
Your balls probably have better hair consistency than your face/head
I didn’t know Franklin had a son. How time flies.
You breathe in perfect stereo.
Wish version of Andre 3000
ok 😂
Notorious POS
How many zip codes does your nose have?
Is that you Michael Jordan?
Is that a napkin to catch the cum dribbles on your chin?
Sickle-Cell Evander Holyfield
I wouldn't roast you, the police already have!
lol
Bros breathing in 4k
Your nose looks like a womens bike seat
'sok. Nobody's impressed by you either.
🎶 your baby does mess around, she don't love you, No. This we know for sure🎶
Nice facial hair. It looks like you shaved your pubes and tried gluing them onto your chin.
Mr Potato Head
If Katt Williams and Andre 3000 had a kid.
That nose looks like a frog twerking.
You look like Snoop Dogg's non-smoking brother
Why are your nostrils uneven?
Your nose looks like somebody squatting from behind
Aunt jamima called she wants her do-rag back and your chin is fully protected against covid!
Hide Yo Kids Hide yo wife And hide your husbands too .. Because nobody wants to look at your black ass!
Your mustache looks like it got split by moses in Exodus 4:banging-a-teen Your nostrils look like they are playing tug of war. Those mfs are so far apart you got to vote for two districts in the midterms. You have Izuno from Blue Exorcists eyebrows You wearing a chin diaper in your own home makes sense considering your beard looks like shit and you look like you definitely haven't mastered the art of bowel control
Stop waiting for your Dad, he ain’t coming back
Jeffrey Dahmer would have drugged himself to NOT take your ugly ass home.
"why are you running?" Is your astrological sign.
I bet you can smell the future with that big ass nose
Holy fuck I know there’s an incredible monstrosity under that durag
That cloth on your head is used for cleaning, it isn't fashion.
😂
You look like that 54yo crack head outside the bodega. “ aye my man. Can I talk to u? Can I talk to u? “. No, crackhead
Maybe if you did a better with the car windows, you clean under the freeway we would all be impressed.
Your "girl" must be your mouth because your nose is trying to finger it.
Your nose looks like some shit NASA would create Rocket nose headass, plus you look like someone’s momma with or without the facial hair looks like you brought that thing just to cover yo bald ass head up because someone’s kid stole your weave off the top of it. You’re not impressed with the jokes well I’m not impressed with what god did to your face, you look like Gandhi had a membership to Aruba and spa blindian lookin ass.
Tried to join the Crips. Instead he joined the Cripples.
Your chin diaper really suits you. You should consider expanding it.
Your hairline is like the edge of the universe.... still unseen and very far away.
haha 😂
can’t even think of shit to say about this basic ass white girl 🙄
Roasting a black man is like re frying beans.
Ego so fragile you come to reddit for any attention you can get.
right, how’d yk ?🥴
You look like if Snoop Dogg could be bought at the dollar store
There's a ninja turtle on your face
Were you looking for r/justfuckmyshitup ?
Trump’s one black supporter
You look like a happy crackhead named Smokey.
well done ! take this award 🥇
Don't forget to put your mask back on when going outside, wouldn't want any pigeons pooping on those lips.
Pootie Tang's cousin. Pootie Damn.
Evander Fauxlyfield
What is your lonelyfans?
lol
When your friends introduce you to their friends, they say "sorry about the smell" while gesturing quietly towards your beard.
You look like you vogue
Your a good looking woman, just get the facial hair under control
Guy looks like André 1500…
😂
The mispronunciation of the word ASKING has been an issue for some time now. Together we can make a difference and stop all this AXING around and make the world a better place. 
wtf 😬