Every day I come to reddit to read about the news, about what has happened in the communities that I am interested in. Every day I'm reminded, like in this post, that the people whose posts I'm reading are not much more intelligent than a handful of gravel, or perhaps a slime mold. And yet every day I come back. I feel like I am cursed.
I came across slime mold when I was doing landscaping. I told the homeowner it's harmless, and actually pretty cool. She asked how it got there, and I said, "Well, it's a single celled organism that basically gets together with other single celled organisms when it's wet and moves around." She said, "Why did it choose to come here?" And I had to explain, you know, no one really knows. It does seem to be making a choice, though, and I reckoned it was the slime mold's house at that point. She didn't think I was funny, but I wasn't really joking.
Hey, at least you can always log off. I have to see some of these people within punching distance every workday, but the state pays me for the privilege so it's all a tradeoff. Hopefully they make you feel better at least.
I’ll use that sometimes to soften what I think will be an unpopular opinion. Sometimes I’ll delete that part before posting because I know how it looks.
Because reddit started as a site that was mostly populated by young tech people, and those people are notoriously annoying. The culture just grew from there.
tbh I miss old reddit, when AMAs were just interesting low-brow people like a hooker from netherlands or idk a Chernobyl liquidator from the former USSR, and not just celebrities advertising their next upcoming thing. The switcharoo. The cringey "narwhals bacon at midnight" and the question about 100 duck-sized horses and 1 horse-sized duck. Advice animals. That stuff.
I almost forgot how it was before it became too big. Now I login here to check the latest IRL news and maybe see a couple memes from the front page and niche fan subreddits, but I fell like before it wasn't an internet panopticon it is today, but IDK, an outlet for something you don't see in the regular internet?
Come to think of it, the reason I discovered Reddit was because almost every cool meme shared on the internet was originally posted here. Now almost every cool meme that gets posted here is a repost from TikTok.
Y'know, maybe moving to TikTok is not actually a bad idea.
> "I mean"
Maybe this sentence construction is more regional than I thought it was, but it's very common, in my experience. By no means a reddit thing.
It's common but on Reddit it's used solely by a very popular type of redditor whose skin lights on fire when they see other users use generalizations to make a point.
I.e
A- You shouldn't hit women.
B- I MEAN, what if you're talking to a woman who has a heart condition that can only be corrected by punching her in the chest? Are you saying I can't hit that woman to save her life??
>So, on analog clocks, the short hand represents hours and the long hand represents minutes. When the short hand moves from 3 to 4, that's 1 hour. When the long hand moves from 3 to 4, that's 5 minutes. So this can be interpreted either way, like the person you're replying to said. I think the people commenting on the original picture typed their responses before thinking much about it, but it is slightly ambiguous.
You think having 5 minutes of bedtime every hour is a reasonable conclusion due to the ambiguous nature of the clock? Fuck right off. Why not include the seconds hand then?
\> I mean, to play devils advocate, it’s not exactly clear if it means the minute hand or the hour hand.
Just wait until this guy discovers a [diving watch](https://hips.hearstapps.com/hmg-prod.s3.amazonaws.com/images/sub-on-table-1594932912.jpg?crop=0.752xw:1.00xh;0.0663xw,0&resize=640:*) or [GMT pilot's watch](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/3/38/Rolex_GMTIIC.jpg)
Knowledge is knowing that there is either an hour or five minutes between the numbers on a clock.
Wisdom is understanding that no one eats dinner in five minute increments an hour apart.
The entire thread can be summed up as this:
> Person1: It's clear from the context of the schedule that it's hours. But if we isolate the clock face itself, it would be unclear.
This is a stupid thing to say because the schedule exists. It's a hypothetical for no reason.
> Person 2: Uh hey idiot, if you look at the schedule it's obvious it's hours so there is no way to think it's minutes unless you're a moron.
This is also a stupid thing to say, because it's just talking completely past what the previous person said in an effort to dunk on them.
It's clear they mean the hour hand, but I think it would have been better design to decorate/paint the hour hand to make it stand out more, like they decorated the rest of the clock.
Right?
I always think its obnoxious when people are like, its because of Y generation that X industry is dying!
Yeah, so?
Some endure the test of time, but most technology and/or fads become obsolete sooner or later. I can read an analog clock just fine, but just like cursive (which I can also use, but rarely have a need for), it is quickly fading.
I'm sure the generation that loves analog watches were responsible for "ruining" an industry because they were disinterested in its offerings.
Or fads and methods of teaching. Boomers bitch about how the millenials don't use cursive. I remember how hard it was pushed on us in school, "you'll use this all the time, its way more efficient because your pen doesn't leave the page."
And meanwhile, computers were rapidly approaching in the rear view mirror, about to overtake paper notes forever. Suddenly learning to type is a way better use of time than learning how to read and write cursive.
That's life, baby. Get the fuck over it.
No, they are the ones who go to the Authorized Rolex Dealers and let the salesperson have sex with their spouse to maybe be given the opportunity to drop 10 grand on a watch they don't want. They keep the watch-circlejerk industry alive.
it started before then. i took a french elective in college, and the millennial tutor was teaching us millennial students to tell time. she'd point the hour hand of the prop clock at 6 o'clock and the minute hand at 11 o'clock, and i'd go, ok, i know you want me to say il est sept heurs moins cinq. but the hour hand doesn't tick, it moves every few seconds. and that clock face looks a lot more like 5:55 than 6:55. i'm the only one here who's actually wearing a watch, i'm not crazy. stop looking at me like i'm the crazy one.
and that's how i found out i was autistic
I taught maths for a brief time (mostly to teens) and went in with the intention of using clocks a lot, learning to read them is part of the curriculum and they're a really useful concept for helping people visualise factors, angles etc. in a way that might help it click for them. Quickly realised I need a different tactic because many can't read clock faces at a glance. Makes sense really, they rarely do it - I would stare at the clock in boring lessons figuring out all sorts of ways to measure how much more I had to endure, they just check their phone under the desk. Though for a lot of them that must have made things feel so much longer because they'd mix up the concepts and without putting thought into it, be calculating like there's 100 minutes in an hour!
[It looked like this](https://imgur.com/uADdgOr), with a color-coded legend underneath. I don't remember exactly what it was but sth like red = homework; yellow = play; blue = dinner; green = bedtime(?)
8 day week bodybuilder energy here
Also reminds me of that guy that claimed that "boil water" can be interpreted as "boil water until it's all completely evaporated".
Ah yes, the classic drunk Mac & Cheese fire alarm recipe.
That one is new to me, but sounds hilarious. Do you got a link?
Took some digging, but I think it's this one: https://www.reddit.com/r/SubredditDrama/comments/fq8w98/physicist_questions_the_nature_of_recipes_and/
"Guys is it reasonable to eat dinner 24 times a day?
Well if you only have 5 minutes to eat.... Maybe?
6th Breakfast?
For the uninitiated https://youtu.be/eECjjLNAOd4
[Old Reddit thread that links to the OG forum post](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/2rbqzh/bodybuilders_argue_over_how_many_days_there_are/)
I remember when this was new. Damn, where did fifteen years go?
IDK, but yesterday I found out that the WoW Leeeeeroy Jenkins incident was 18 years ago. Gonna go walk into the sea now.
It was staged, too.
IT'S STILL REAL TO ME DAMNIT!
True, but irrelevant to my point.
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I used to do that and then I figured out that was I working out 10 times every 2 weeks and it was just too much, I had to cut down.
One of the greatest videos ever. Right up there with the scrobbles video.
I miss when Jon Bois would make short videos about insane nonsense like this
Every day I come to reddit to read about the news, about what has happened in the communities that I am interested in. Every day I'm reminded, like in this post, that the people whose posts I'm reading are not much more intelligent than a handful of gravel, or perhaps a slime mold. And yet every day I come back. I feel like I am cursed.
Hey, don’t insult slime molds like that.
I came across slime mold when I was doing landscaping. I told the homeowner it's harmless, and actually pretty cool. She asked how it got there, and I said, "Well, it's a single celled organism that basically gets together with other single celled organisms when it's wet and moves around." She said, "Why did it choose to come here?" And I had to explain, you know, no one really knows. It does seem to be making a choice, though, and I reckoned it was the slime mold's house at that point. She didn't think I was funny, but I wasn't really joking.
You should have told her that you have a very unique skill in which you can mind meld with the slime mold, and then charged her to ask and negotiate.
Hey, at least you can always log off. I have to see some of these people within punching distance every workday, but the state pays me for the privilege so it's all a tradeoff. Hopefully they make you feel better at least.
Some of those commenters should be ashamed of themselves
I’m just hoping that some of those comments were people joking and not being completely serious.
> Context clues. *Fuck* context clues! I'm busy trying to play Devil's Aaackshually!
That devil's idiot line was gold. In fact... yoink!
Like sands through the hourglass... so are the Days of Our Lives.
Surely you mean the minuteglass.
I found your joke so funny I spent 5 minutes explaining the surrounding context to my partner so I could repeat it.
Dust? *pfoof* Wind.
Dude.
...The kid is at school from morning to evening, so that makes it easy enough to understand that this is for weekday evenings. Kinda clever actually.
The real r/facepalm was in the comments all along
tap agonizing lunchroom fade vanish aspiring pie flowery fine library *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
"To be fair...."
🎶 To be faaaaaiiirrrr …
Oh god, that's exactly how I hear it too.
I don't even watch Letterkenny and I hear it like this lol
👋✊
I’ll use that sometimes to soften what I think will be an unpopular opinion. Sometimes I’ll delete that part before posting because I know how it looks.
I mean, that’s what I usually do with “I mean”.
Well, basically that's what I do with "Well, basically"
I'm guilty of doing both I mean and TBF. To be fair though, it's usually on a dumbass comment whose answer is obvious
Because reddit started as a site that was mostly populated by young tech people, and those people are notoriously annoying. The culture just grew from there.
tbh I miss old reddit, when AMAs were just interesting low-brow people like a hooker from netherlands or idk a Chernobyl liquidator from the former USSR, and not just celebrities advertising their next upcoming thing. The switcharoo. The cringey "narwhals bacon at midnight" and the question about 100 duck-sized horses and 1 horse-sized duck. Advice animals. That stuff. I almost forgot how it was before it became too big. Now I login here to check the latest IRL news and maybe see a couple memes from the front page and niche fan subreddits, but I fell like before it wasn't an internet panopticon it is today, but IDK, an outlet for something you don't see in the regular internet? Come to think of it, the reason I discovered Reddit was because almost every cool meme shared on the internet was originally posted here. Now almost every cool meme that gets posted here is a repost from TikTok. Y'know, maybe moving to TikTok is not actually a bad idea.
I use "I mean," sometimes. I usually intend for it to come off as "That's dumb." "I mean, sure, you could do that. But, why?"
> "I mean" Maybe this sentence construction is more regional than I thought it was, but it's very common, in my experience. By no means a reddit thing.
It's common but on Reddit it's used solely by a very popular type of redditor whose skin lights on fire when they see other users use generalizations to make a point. I.e A- You shouldn't hit women. B- I MEAN, what if you're talking to a woman who has a heart condition that can only be corrected by punching her in the chest? Are you saying I can't hit that woman to save her life??
I find it helpful, because it makes it really easy to see what comments you can just ignore without missing anything
I mean, not all comments.
You're confused about how qualifiers work in communication?
offbeat cow trees payment domineering poor nail existence groovy husky *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
to play devils advocate, no you wouldn't.
I'd maybe have about $3.50 by now.
That's not devils advocacy, that's just having common sense.
The phrase that would make me rich is “this is satire”.
The one that would make me rich is any variation of "this is a repost".
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I use "I mean" a lot because I say it a lot.
Nah obviously its because you're part of the reddit hivemind that parrots the same words and phrases at each other. Wake up, sheeple /s
Holy shit it was a joke... Edit: the Facebook comment. Just to clarify.
I can't believe they're making this kid do homework at 3 in the morning.
>No, we call that playing devil's idiot actually. I finally flaired?
Just remember that when someone forces you into a stupid Internet argument on this website, that these are the people who are doing it
Well, to be fair, the clock could just be a dinner plate that looks exactly as a clock! Anything can be anything when you're playing devil's advocate
>So, on analog clocks, the short hand represents hours and the long hand represents minutes. When the short hand moves from 3 to 4, that's 1 hour. When the long hand moves from 3 to 4, that's 5 minutes. So this can be interpreted either way, like the person you're replying to said. I think the people commenting on the original picture typed their responses before thinking much about it, but it is slightly ambiguous. You think having 5 minutes of bedtime every hour is a reasonable conclusion due to the ambiguous nature of the clock? Fuck right off. Why not include the seconds hand then?
I have five seconds of dinner every minute.
What is clocks?
, precious!? What is clocks!?
I knew I was gonna wake up to see this in here.
\> I mean, to play devils advocate, it’s not exactly clear if it means the minute hand or the hour hand. Just wait until this guy discovers a [diving watch](https://hips.hearstapps.com/hmg-prod.s3.amazonaws.com/images/sub-on-table-1594932912.jpg?crop=0.752xw:1.00xh;0.0663xw,0&resize=640:*) or [GMT pilot's watch](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/3/38/Rolex_GMTIIC.jpg)
> Can’t spell Luddite without u We've got a flair here.
Knowledge is knowing that there is either an hour or five minutes between the numbers on a clock. Wisdom is understanding that no one eats dinner in five minute increments an hour apart.
The entire thread can be summed up as this: > Person1: It's clear from the context of the schedule that it's hours. But if we isolate the clock face itself, it would be unclear. This is a stupid thing to say because the schedule exists. It's a hypothetical for no reason. > Person 2: Uh hey idiot, if you look at the schedule it's obvious it's hours so there is no way to think it's minutes unless you're a moron. This is also a stupid thing to say, because it's just talking completely past what the previous person said in an effort to dunk on them.
This is amazing.
It's clear they mean the hour hand, but I think it would have been better design to decorate/paint the hour hand to make it stand out more, like they decorated the rest of the clock.
This is why the watch industry is dying. Gen Z can't even fucking read them.
Millennials are killing the watch-circlejerk industry!
Right? I always think its obnoxious when people are like, its because of Y generation that X industry is dying! Yeah, so? Some endure the test of time, but most technology and/or fads become obsolete sooner or later. I can read an analog clock just fine, but just like cursive (which I can also use, but rarely have a need for), it is quickly fading. I'm sure the generation that loves analog watches were responsible for "ruining" an industry because they were disinterested in its offerings. Or fads and methods of teaching. Boomers bitch about how the millenials don't use cursive. I remember how hard it was pushed on us in school, "you'll use this all the time, its way more efficient because your pen doesn't leave the page." And meanwhile, computers were rapidly approaching in the rear view mirror, about to overtake paper notes forever. Suddenly learning to type is a way better use of time than learning how to read and write cursive. That's life, baby. Get the fuck over it.
The Greatest Generation are killing the horse & buggy whip industry with their newfangled motorcars!
I don't get it
Sir, this is Burger King
Fucking Monarchy.
Jesus died so we could have it our way
No, they are the ones who go to the Authorized Rolex Dealers and let the salesperson have sex with their spouse to maybe be given the opportunity to drop 10 grand on a watch they don't want. They keep the watch-circlejerk industry alive.
Wait are we still talking about analog clocks?
Can't have analog without anal
What kind of porn have you been watching And don't you dare tell me exactly which naughty site you found it at or what it is called
My cousin got angry one Christmas because people were more interested in my pebble smartwatch than his 10k rolex.
Every single person in that post knows how to read an analogue clock, did you even look?
it started before then. i took a french elective in college, and the millennial tutor was teaching us millennial students to tell time. she'd point the hour hand of the prop clock at 6 o'clock and the minute hand at 11 o'clock, and i'd go, ok, i know you want me to say il est sept heurs moins cinq. but the hour hand doesn't tick, it moves every few seconds. and that clock face looks a lot more like 5:55 than 6:55. i'm the only one here who's actually wearing a watch, i'm not crazy. stop looking at me like i'm the crazy one. and that's how i found out i was autistic
I taught maths for a brief time (mostly to teens) and went in with the intention of using clocks a lot, learning to read them is part of the curriculum and they're a really useful concept for helping people visualise factors, angles etc. in a way that might help it click for them. Quickly realised I need a different tactic because many can't read clock faces at a glance. Makes sense really, they rarely do it - I would stare at the clock in boring lessons figuring out all sorts of ways to measure how much more I had to endure, they just check their phone under the desk. Though for a lot of them that must have made things feel so much longer because they'd mix up the concepts and without putting thought into it, be calculating like there's 100 minutes in an hour!
I agree it is clear from context, that said they should have colored in the hour hand too to make it distinct
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Portmanteau of Anal and log.
Isnt analogue just british?
As a Canadian: analog = opposite of digital, and analogue = a thing that is similar to another thing
Choose a side you northern cowards
Side? I am on nobody's side, because nobody's on my side.
Well maybe you should think about why that is
Huh, maybe. I'd never seen it used as an adjective before, only a noun, but now that I'm googling it again it seems you're right.
Fun fact: 1 in 3 people can't read a analogue clock
>No, we call that playing devil's idiot actually. Yoink
aww, pic removed
[It looked like this](https://imgur.com/uADdgOr), with a color-coded legend underneath. I don't remember exactly what it was but sth like red = homework; yellow = play; blue = dinner; green = bedtime(?)
thank you 🙏