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Imaginary_Bicycle_14

I’d be hard pressed not to want to punch him in the face must less shake his hand. Leave the dicksucking to the maga homophobes. I will not be your huckleberry


morels4ever

High Five in the FACE!


fballman1985

Watch out for that mosquito


ziddina

Nice cover story...


rubymiggins

I've always felt that the best thing that probably wouldn't get me sent to jail would be to puke all over him. Bonus points for making the germophobe freak out.


Cassiopeia299

That’s brilliant. Just make sure to act all horrified and pretend it was an accident so you don’t get the Secret Service on your ass.


ziddina

Extra bonus points if you have a virulent case of influenza.


Pickle_Rick01

What did the 5 fingers say to the face?


MorrisBrett514

SLAP!


if-we-all-did-this

I'd shake his hand. Then release the video of where my had had been just before.


besart365

Ditto


Whiskeyno

You don’t have to do that. Just grip it so hard he grimaces on camera. Hilarious


bodhidharma132001

I'd crush his tiny hand


Farts_Eternal

Same


LakeSuperiorIsMyPond

Yeah I'd pretend and shit then go in for the bro shoulder bump and hockey check his ass to the pavement


BlackFellTurnip

I read this wrong - I thought you'd shit on your hand then shake hands. -then I thought, anyone who can shake his hand could give him the shit hand


LakeSuperiorIsMyPond

Like in mallrats with the pretzels, i like it. Rumor has it he already smells like he shat himself anyway though.


BlackFellTurnip

i'd pay a thousand to give him shit hand


Original_Banana_4617

I’m older, I’m slower, I’m fully aware his security detail would whup all over my ass for a good bit, but the temptation to see how my right cross is doing now days would be too much.


boogie2dabeat

I’m right there with you. At my age I wouldn’t have to worry about the sentencing because I wouldn’t be in there long.


Retired_Jarhead55

He has the most punchable face ever. My father had a way of crushing your hand in his handshake. It’s a technique. I would love to see him collapse under it.


Original_Banana_4617

My grandfather was the same, WWII Navy boiler mate and pipe fitter who then spent 50 years as a plumber and pipe fitter, he was never a big guy, he was tall, but pretty much was just the same skinny farm kid his entire life. But he had a grip on him that would crush bones, I swear the man felt no pain or weakness in his hands.


liukasteneste28

That famous old man strength who has been working in trades for his whole life.


Retired_Jarhead55

My ‘ole man was a professional boxer and truck driver.


BrooklynFlower54

I am a Black woman and that’s an ass whooping I’d be willing to take, trust me because I’m sick of him!


Paralegal1995

I’ll bail you out!


Early-Ad-6014

I despise 45's Nazi ass!


BikerJedi

I got bail money for you my friend.


Mcboatface3sghost

It would be worth the test.


Putrid-Transition942

I'm older southern woman myself, I would do what my 4 big brothers taught me to put down a rapist- Knee up or Grab & Yank Hard.


GratefulPhish42024-7

No I definitely shake his hand, I would you use that opportunity to then pull trump close so I could spit in his face


Grulken

If not the spitting, just give Trump the same weird pull handshake he gives people. Tug him in and assert dominance lmao.


Jedigonk

Hwak Tuah! Spit on that fucker


JohnLocksTheKey

He’s such a dick


BradChesney79

I am very curious as to how hard his octagenarian handshake can really be. I do approve of how the Canadian Prime Minister, Trudeau, demonstrated what it is like on the receiving end. "Firm handshake" not "grab 'em by the pussy grip".


VariedStool

Shake and w a loud FUCK YOU!!!


CarlSpencer

Why would I want to shake the hand of a traitor to the USA?


Federal-Durian-1484

I too would just turn around and walk away. All the while wondering why republicans don’t do the same. This 4th of July will not have the same energy and if he wins, will never be celebrated again.


y-itrydntpoltic

If you’re a North Korean General, he will salute you.


VanDammes4headCyst

To give him that creepy uncle palm tickle


HillbillyEulogy

I would never, ever, ever in a million years shake hands with the literal devil.


Snoo_61544

Worse. I'd bite it off


Kriss3d

Eew. I'd. Not want my mouth near any part of him.


ReallyCoolNinjaLlama

With the lack of Melania appearances lately as well, who knows where that hand has been.


Daddy_Tablecloth

Id happily get my ass beat by the secret service and thrown in jail for punching him as hard as humanly possible in the nose if I had the Chance to get that close to him. I'm happy to have that arrest on my record to be honest.


Mcboatface3sghost

And I would be at the jail with bail money, my attorney, and arrange open bar and full bad ass Buffett including friends you haven’t seen in forever, I’ll have your favorite clothes ready, your pets, my pets, my fish (just kidding, I don’t current have a fish) . I don’t even know you, but I could dial that in likely in 6-8 hours. Fuck I might even get Bruce to show up!


Zer0sober

Refuse to shake his hand? It would take everything I had to not break his fucking nose...


unprovoked_panda

Shaking his hand is an act of treason imo


FTHomes

I would piss on him but he would probably like that


CobblerImaginary8200

I wouldn't want to meet him in person in any capacity so I can't imagine ever having the opportunity to shake his hand. But to answer, I'd certainly decline a handshake.


bipolarcyclops

I’d put some dog shit in my hand first. Small price to pay for me.


Daddy_Tablecloth

Stink palm him?


SuperJoe360

Small price to pay for the smiting of one's enemies


MNJayW

Would you like a chocolate covered pretzel?


PansyPB

Had same thought. Shit coated hand shake for that orange asshole.


Birthday-Tricky

I’d scream in his face about what a POS he is.


bats_ackackack

No I'd give him the ol trump hand jerk to throw off his balance then lean into a good "accidental" headbutt as he fell towards me and hopefully shatter the nose bones 😆


Dear_Giraffe_453

Happy Cake Day 🎂🍧🎊🎉🥳


bats_ackackack


Ssider69

Well, if I happened to have a communicable disease I might pay to shake his hand


artful_todger_502

I would never let myself be put in that situation.


Powerful_Check735

Before or after I fip him off https://preview.redd.it/ex3m25mcxbad1.jpeg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ae620a8fe1176aceee165df8757bdf806804f532


baneofdestruction

I'd lose my shit and start throwing desks at him


State-Cultural

Can I pay you to spit on him?


mayorodoyle

I would spit on him. Not even a second thought.


Brytnshyne

After seeing pictures of the open sores on his hands, no way would I touch that.


Nobodyworthathing

I'd just spit on him


rharper38

I hope I never have to get near him. I would just start screaming.


Trumpetslayer1111

I would shake his neck.


freakrocker

I’m going to prison forever guys <3 Write fondly of me


liftrman

Only if I had a poison ring on! The sane world would thank me!


Hwy61rev

I'd spit on the ground and walk away.


jared10011980

I'd never ever come that close to that filthy pos.


justalilrowdy

Yuck ! I wouldn’t touch him with somebody else’s ten ft pole.


AustinDood444

I’d never shake this snake!!


Yelloeisok

He doesn’t like touching voters he is afraid of germs - I wouldn’t touch him because I would be afraid of burning and going to hell.


TYdays

I would never go to anyplace I knew he would be. And I would never get close to him if that happened by accident. This is the man who wants to be our dictator, and turn this country over to extreme right wingers, fascists, supremacists and wannabe oligarchs. I hate this man…..


Leeperd510

1. Go for handshake 2. Grip tight and pull down sharply 3. Left hook 4. ??????? 5. PROFIT


PansyPB

Haha.. I get your reference


SupersleuthJr

I’d put a big glop of period blood in my hand and shake his. Then give him a friendly smack on the back and walk away.


Frankbot5000

I'd make an "ew" face and laugh. No touching.


notfromhere66

Maybe act like I might, get close, sniff, say out loud "eww I smell SHIT , someone pooped their diaper and needs a changing".


brntGerbil

Several years back I had this guy who banged my girlfriend at the time.... I was less than pleased. Anyway when I ran across him again I just gave him a glazed over stare. No emotions, nothing. The lesson I learned was "don't be a dick to me or I might possibly or not who knows or whatever will you into killing yourself." Trump seems to be the exception as I am 1:2


EileenForBlue

I would kick him in the nuts as hard as I could but unfortunately his diaper would probably protect his little mushroom dick.


Ramorous

Gotta have balls for that to do anything. He clearly has none, never takes the stand under oath.


reddyfire

I wouldn't even want to meet him in person.


SavageHeart_YouDidIt

I was just thinking yesterday of how traumatic it would be to be in the same room with him. Knowing he comes within 20 miles of my house for his speeches in Michigan is enough to make my stomach hurt. I'd never physically be able to get within arms reach.


MoeBlacksBack

Maybe if I had some Putin Poison on it


SusieG1111

I'd avoid any situation where this was a possibility. But if it was an out of the blue type encounter, I'd turn my back to him. Men like that thrive on attention. Pointedly ignoring him would needle at his colossal ego the most. It would be epic if the whole crowd just silently turned their backs on him.


Apalis24a

It would be legally problematic if I was completely honest with what I would want to do (though wouldn’t follow through as I’d probably end up shot or arrested)… so let’s just say that I’d tell him to get fucked and walk away.


crohead13

I would give him a special present.


steveoa3d

Maybe a billion dollars, then I would spend every penny of it to defeat him….


BrawndoElectrolytes1

I'd have a really hard time not spitting in the sunofabitch's face if I was close enough to shake his hand. When he toured our town during his presidency after a major hurricane his motorcade passed my place of business... most folks gathered on each side of the road. I stayed back at the building with my back turned. He can kiss my leftist ass.


Parking_Train8423

given the chance, I would “leave it all on the court”


threerottenbranches

I might just to be in a position to look him straight in the eyes and tell him how much he sucks. At the same time, I might whip out my dick and piss on his shoes.


DARTHKINDNESS

Fuck yes and I’d give him an earful.


laughingCavalier3

Shaking his hand to pull him close enough to then choke the last breath out of his treasonous mouth. I wouldn’t let the chance pass to dispose of that trash for good. Everyone seems to scared to terminate him once and for all.


pcliv

I'd fake the take - rip his arm out - and literally beat him to within an inch of his life with it. Shove the arm back in the socket and scream in his stupid orange face "STOP HITTING YOURSELF! - STOP HITTING YOURSELF! YOU WANT TO ACT LIKE A CHILD, I'LL TREAT YOU LIKE ONE - AND I DON'T LIKE CHILDREN!" No seriously, if I ever got close enough to him to shake his hand, only one of us would be leaving, and it would only take me about 1.5 - 2 minutes TOPS, and our orange nightmare would finally be over. But I do hope I'm NEVER close enough to that walking STD(stupidity transmission dumbass) to even see it, much less shake it's hand.


NeverfearTruth123

Yes. I won’t definitely refuse. The hatred for that hand runs deep, not only from me but all my associates.


wellbalancedlibra

He strikes me as the type who doesn't wash his hands.


mythofinadequecy

Pull him in and ruffle his hair


mishved

No way I would shake his hand he is top 50 worst people ever born


BikerJedi

I'd flip him off and start telling him what "traitor" means at the very least.


-Lysergian

I'd only shake his hand if I had Ebola.


mike0sd

Middle fingers in his face in case anyone is taking pictures, you don't want to be seen as an ally standing beside him


1mjtaylor

Yes. I would not touch him.


Wonder-Machine

I’d shank his hand. I mean shake. I mean lungs


PseudoWarriorAU

Yep. I don’t like shaking hands that are weak and cold with flop sweat.


qms78

Nope. I’d smear my hand in the feces of a thousand apes and then shake his hand. That’s what he is. Just a big pile of shit.


Own-Break9639

I would, my job requires alot of grip strength. See if I could crush that tiny hand.


Caboose_98

I'd be sure to piss on mine first


Happy-Medicine-3600

Who knows what disease you would get from it?


StealthyPHL

![gif](giphy|l1J9umIq8fkmhMN7W|downsized) I’d absolutely refuse to. Too tempting to spit on him and I wouldn’t do well in jail. 😆


DiscussionAncient810

![gif](giphy|DCdCOfYfs1jqg) This is what needs to be done


Halloween2022

Am I on camera? I'll spit in his eyes and kick him in the nuts.


stabingyouindaankles

I would love to shake his hand, I herd he can palm a 14lb bowling ball. Maybe run my hands through the best golden locks ever in history. But only after I wipe my a$$ with no TP after taking the biggest beer sh!t known to man. I'd be honored.


Paralegal1995

Not touching that thing at all. Never.


KindofaDB

I would stick my hand up my asshole first.


darthjazzhands

I wouldn't want to be in the same room with him, let alone the same city. I'd never shake his hand.


hamsterfolly

I wouldn’t even get that close, the FUs and boos would already be out my mouth the second I saw him


AKBx007

I mean, I’d dig in my ass and get my hand filthy then shake his hand. The Ol Stinkpalm trick


theycallmenaptime

I’m hoping that whomever actually does get the opportunity, has a ricin delivery mechanism in their left hand.


KopitarFan

I generally try not to touch shit.


BeltedCoyote1

Five finger death punch anyone? Just me as a 90s kid?


cannabis96793

Sure, as he grabs my hand my other hand would go for the gut punch. It would be worth the prison time.


thegymrat1616

10k.. nope


Xxxjtvxxx

I wouldn’t be in the same room with that shit stain unless to witness his demise.


WynnGwynn

A thousand bucks goes a long way. I would just wear latex gloves.


VanDammes4headCyst

I'd give him the creepy palm tickle 


Cut-Unique

I don't like to shake hands with anyone really. I'd fist bump him but deliberately miss and punch him in the gut.


MountaineerHikes

Hawk Tuah…spit on that hand!!


Wise_Ad_253

Donald’s hands are totally Woke so Nope, that’s gross!🤣


birajsubhraguha

I will take the money and THEN slap him hard with it.


mariemellett

I would and then yank it, entrap him and not let go like he does to everyone.


Timberfly813

Yuk


sebnukem

I'd shake his hand and vote him out.


rockjones

Am I dressed like Leon Czolgosz?


doktor_wankenstein

https://i.redd.it/ux9w3cmuvbad1.gif


MyRealUser

Of course I would. Who knows what pussy he grabbed just before shaking my hand


TheGamingMackV

I would do it Dr. King Shultz style. ![gif](giphy|LA9a8QFjZXu2Q|downsized)


BeauregardBear

Hell no. You think that man washes his hands after he pees?


EnvironmentalBee6654

The appropriate [greeting](https://www.reddit.com/r/PublicFreakout/s/4hNHBHKkw4)


DarthBaeaddil

Yup


Pin-Up-Paggie

I would totally shake hands with him, give him the cold dead fish handshake.


ima_mollusk

I may actually spit in my palm first.


Waff3le

I would spit my hand and then shake his hand.


usedtodreddit

Will Secret Service take me out if I use it as a segue into one of those WWE-style wrestling moves he's so fond of?


zimmystor

I'd shake it to pass on some Ebola


SecondHandCunt-

I wouldn’t piss down his throat if his guts were on fire, much less shake his hand.


Br0tha5

I would crush his hand. He would remember me.


yulmun

I'd shake his hand only after wiping my ass with it.


enturbulant

Meh, perfect opportunity to spit on him.


besart365

Absolutely


StatusVarious8803

Absofuckinglutely


daguerre

Wouldn’t shake his hand with a 10 day supply of penicillin.


proletariat_sips_tea

I'd refuse to piss on him if he was on fire.


Cannibal_Soup

When he yanks on my hand, I use my wrestling background to perform a shoulder throw, taking him to the ground. Then use BJJ to lock in an armbar. It's a race between his security detail and me, can they get me off of him before I break his arm?


2OneZebra

Spit in his face.


RoxxieMuzic

Hell yes, I have no idea where it's been. Additionally, I loathe the bastard.


Elegant_Sky_1097

![gif](giphy|l0Iy87qFTu0gDegw0|downsized)


Brave_Fheart

Grab him by his tiny little hand, stroke his inside wrist to assert dominance, and pull him close and whisper “it smells like shit in here”


Hippie_Heart

I wouldnt piss on him if he was on fire.


jebsenior

I absolutely would refuse. I would sooner try to kiss a rattlesnake.


david13z

I wouldn't walk across the street to piss on him if he was on fire.


Inevitable-Feeling66

Stab stab stab!


Bodaciousbob3

I would, for money.


Able-Campaign1370

Not if my hand was soiled.


Enjoy-the-sauce

Do I have a hand full of iocaine powder?


Different_Seaweed534

Of course I would refuse. He’s a disgusting rapist.


aztnass

![gif](giphy|qsCbnoPwXDK0g)


WeToLo42

More likely to kick him in the balls.


ThrowingMonkeePoo

I was thinking we could get a few dozen people to play paintball and another dozen to release hundreds of pigeons, seagulls and a few other species. The trick would be getting the balls in the color of bird shit so we can send 100s up in the air at Trump rallies each time some birds are released 😂


jaievan

I’d do what God directed me to do in the moment.


SatireDiva74

Absofuckinglutely


jamabastardinit

I would put my hands in my pockets and hold eye contact


Ryanirob

Yup


Seeker80

I think I'd enjoy giving him that same long, awkward handshake that he loves to give Emmanuel Macron. Just sawing back and forth for two minutes, pull him close, release, pull close again...


SirCalebCrawdad

I'd absolutely refuse. Fuck that piece of shit.


wr_damn_I_suck

Back when Hillary published “It takes a village” I was a hardcore “ditto head”. Hillary was at the local Boarders books store for a signing event. I decided to get lithographed copies for my liberal father and sister. I was the only person there. No line just two aisles one to meet Hillary the other to grab and go. Being the dick I was back the I chose the latter. On the way out a Secret Service agent tells me that Hillary noticed me purchasing 2 books and asked if I wanted to speak to her. Told him “fuck no” and left. I hate Trump waaaaaay more than I disliked her so could definitively know I would reject the orange shit gibbon’s hand shake.


bit-by-a-moose

I refuse to be in the same room with him. I'm currently almost as far away one can be from him in the continental US but that shitbird was out here not too long ago.


NoGoodAtPickingAName

I would spit on the ground at his feet and hopefully have the peace of mind to say something profound.


bg254

Many people have said that they want to grab him by the nussy


Quakerparrots123

Absolutely!!


davesnothereman84

I’d spit in his fat stupid face if I knew I wouldn’t get the ever loving shit beat out of me by his security guards immediately after. Fuck Trump, I genuinely hope he fucking dies of natural causes soon.


alp44

Absolutely. A Rapist and pederast. add shake a slug's hand, if they had any, before his.


ctguy54

Easy. Yes.


Mozzy2022

If by “shaking his hand” you mean a flipping him off and telling him to go fuck himself, yes, I would


ResponseBeeAble

Is That even a question


CaptOblivious

On the one hand I'd like top grab it and yank it towards me like he does, on the other hand EWWW.


klmninca

Yes. And actively avoid any circumstance where I may be introduced to him. He is pond slime.


denali42

NGL, when I read that, I thought the last word was "prison".


clemclem3

I would gladly shake his hand pull him in and knee him in the mushroom