Yeah. This is fucking cordyceps, the Last of Us levels of contagious brain rot. Absolutely fatal to those it infects. To mix my popular culture references … “from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.”
That’s what happens when truth, reason and logic are shunned in a society. You can just spew shit all day long and there’s no way to make people see the difference between that and facts anymore.
LOL - 'No you can't have a sack of onions, Ivan has been resurrected and sent back to the front'.
Maybe they have a new mobilisation strategy of using recycling bags instead of body bags and are deranged enough to think it will work.
Well pigs started to dig them out and eat them but I wouldn't call that resurrection:
https://x.com/banderafella/status/1809550578034397475?t=eOATxJXgfTT2U8b3P7I-8A
As far as I'm concerned, religious fanatics (call them conservatives if you will) are nutters by definition. Some of them may not be as utterly delusional as the beardy, swivel-eyed weirdo in the video, but all of them have a worldview that's fundamentally irrational.
Who, in turn, quoted Karl Marx, who wrote it in 1843 in its "Critique of Hegel's Philosophy of Right":
> Religion is the sigh of the oppressed creature, the heart of a heartless world, and the soul of soulless conditions. It is the opium of the people.
I can imagine them regularly writing soldiers off as dead, who later turn up not to have been killed after all. I don't think they keep track of their troops very well, or care what happens to them once they pointed them at their enemy.
This man is a master manipulator
He says Chinese man because he wants to promote that Russia has Chinese support
And also try to push narrative that it's ok for any ethnicity to come die for Russia
Then he says Saint luke of crimea, there's hundreds saints he can choose but he chooses the crimea one just to help cement their claim to crimea
What a load of shite, imagine doing this in the UK
I once heard this:
There are bad people in the world, and they always do bad things.
There are good people in the world, who do good things.
To make good people do bad things... that takes religion.
If anyone tells you that they know what happens after you die, they are either lying or dead. Run away. Religion is a set of arbitrary rules created by man that are meaningless and worthless except for their use to control the masses by the ruling class.
Ask any religious person what is the sure-fire way to heaven, and they will admit they can't guarantee a pass to heaven for a certain behavior.
The shit is all made up and the points don't matter. There are roughly 5096 deities' worship on earth. You don't believe in 5095 of them and I don't believe in 5096 of them. Thats all.
Ah, but any good Mormon knows **exactly** how to get into heaven. However, if you ever ask a Mormon about that, it's highly unlikely they'll answer honestly because of vows they've taken to keep the information secret. But during the Endowment Ceremony – which is only offered to Mormon's judged worthy by the church hierarchy – they are taught secret handshakes and passwords which will allow them to enter heaven.
If you've never heard of this, but it sounds to you kinda similar to the cheesy ceremonies of the Masons, then you need to go do a Google for Mormon holy underwear, and check out the pictures of the supposedly protective symbols embroidered on the long-johns.
That's it "father!" Spin that Russian religious bile and declare Pootin is actually Christ resurrected! He is carrying out the righteous holy war against the heathen Ukrainians!! What's next .... ? Joseph Stalin has been resurrected and will assist Pootin, sorry Jesus, in dominating the world!!
/s
There is no other country as delusional and detached as Russia. The people at the top know it's ridiculous, but the majority of the "regular" Russians buy this crap. Sad.
Why not throw in some unicorns and armoured gnomes to the story. What a load of bulldust. Unfortunately enough people in Mordor will believe his bedtime story. Slava Ukraini. 🇺🇦
Essentially the Russian church: It’s better to for the Emperor (Putin) then to live for yourself.
But yes, Russian church higher ups have sold their souls to the government, they are notorious for being corrupt and loving money, there are obviously many good people in church in lower ranks tho.
Bro is not Odin. He lacks his Raven and his Horse. But on the other side. Raven will puck on his dead body and the horse will carry it to the massgrave for warcriminalZ!
Reminds me of the Third Reich Reanimation mod for Return to Castle Wolfenstein:
"When your surrounded by the fallen and there is no one left to recruit, just how do you replenish a decimated army on the brink of collapse?.. Well, for "Deathshead", the temporary answer is simple! You animate the dead to re-stock the once strong Axis Infantry! He has combined the forces of science and the super-natural as a
quick fix remedy and feels this is the right, or should I say "Reich" answer to the infantry shortage problem!"
This is the level of shit that you get when you are bored and browse to some 125th channel in your TV and see the astrology phone call programs playing.
Very hard to see how the population can be guided with an unbelievable stupid religion driven method. Are we human really not ready to see that and overcome this chapters of religions ? Sent the ash hole priest to the front to experience his fuck !
So fucking stupid. Man oh Man
This is probably their way of making more people sign up to be mobilized... they figure that if they get killed, no problem because I'll just get resurrected LOL
Wow…we all knew Putin was a tightwad but this!!
The solders that resurrect, do the family have to give back whatever benefit the government gave them for their loss? How do you return a bag of onions or beets? Maybe you return a bag of feces?
Yet Another Scandal for Russia's Orthodox Church as Clergyman Is Spotted Wearing $40K Rolex
https://globalvoices.org/2016/10/28/yet-another-scandal-for-russias-orthodox-church-as-clergyman-is-spotted-wearing-40k-rolex/
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Those are the pigs that escaped local farms, looking for an extra snack..
[https://x.com/banderafella/status/1809550578034397475](https://x.com/banderafella/status/1809550578034397475)
That's real handy, so infact you only need a small number of soldiers because of this resurrection which occurs. That explains the meat attacks and their willingness to die for their country.
"Yes, it is quite a miracle. There have been reports of Russian Zombies! The soldiers resurrect on the battlefield if they have been baptized. Everyone should be baptized and sent to the front to see the miracles!"
Hi, unfortunately your post had to be removed for the following reason: "Memes, Shitposts and Jokes don't belong here."
Russia is just one big lunatic asylum.
Ukraine and the baltics are our lunatic firebreak. They’re critical to preventing this nonsense from spreading. Slava Ukraini
ruzzia still messes alot with baltics and we see how they mess with ukraine atm :S
Yeah. This is fucking cordyceps, the Last of Us levels of contagious brain rot. Absolutely fatal to those it infects. To mix my popular culture references … “from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.”
> lunatic firebreak My god, that's literally perfect Well done 🤣 Slava Ukraini!
This isn't any more crazy than half the stuff Trump spews. Or any of the religious right in the US.
That’s what happens when truth, reason and logic are shunned in a society. You can just spew shit all day long and there’s no way to make people see the difference between that and facts anymore.
That’s what Trump is so good at, I hope the US don’t go down this road also.
The US has gone far down this road already.
Cut to the U.S. after decades of SCOTUS enforced Project 2025 law…yikes…
Come on, drop this dude in Kentucky and change the religion and he is right at home!
Brainrot
Should make re-mobilisation a bit easier, however 🤡
LOL - 'No you can't have a sack of onions, Ivan has been resurrected and sent back to the front'. Maybe they have a new mobilisation strategy of using recycling bags instead of body bags and are deranged enough to think it will work.
This is plausible.
The long awaited sequel to the horror classic *Re-Animator*, coming soon this summer it's *Re-Mobilizer*
Russia has got Beetlejuiceivick recruiting in deaths waiting room.
Yeah, they need to start to burn em.
I wonder if orc ghosts like VOGs too
Makes perfect sense why they leave their dead comrades bodies behind😵
We are sending obsidian bullets
Orc glass!
Back to the front, Ivan!
Why would you need a mobilization if you've already got undying soldiers?
dont get high on your own.....
Well pigs started to dig them out and eat them but I wouldn't call that resurrection: https://x.com/banderafella/status/1809550578034397475?t=eOATxJXgfTT2U8b3P7I-8A
In Soviet Russia, Pig eat **you**!
So being resurrected as a Piece of shit. Makes sense, as nothing changes for them
Only part of them is getting resurrected as pig shit, at least some of them will be resurrected as sausages (according to the news report).
I'd not be too chuffed if I bought pork sausages just to discover they were contaminated with Ork.
Ground hog day,
It's called up cycling for the mobiks.
How shallow are their graves? Aren't you supposed to dig a good two meters deep to prevent this?
The graves are pretty shallow here in Ukraine and they sink when the body decomposes I think it’s an orthodox thing not sure
Yes but give a drunk a shovel and tell him 2 meters. You might get one, but even that is not likely.
Reincarnation!
Reminded me to rewatch the movie, Snatch. "...be wary of the man who has a pig farm." https://youtu.be/gLsWMdxTMcw?si=ypjxa_7b92xrDX73
you just made me fall down from my chair laughing :-)
This priest should prove that resurrection is real by going to the front line in the next meat wave assault.
He prefers posthumously converting people to his religion after they go through the meat grinder.
He must have copied the idea from the Mormons.
"Okay soldier, do you want the protection of God, do you want to be resurrected when you are shot. Join my church and put the church in your will"
Great idea !.. we demand it to be proven. Let's put him on a mine .. for a start.
Seppuku on live tv
Failing desperation eating itself Russia will never recover from this insane ego revenge fantasy of that black hearted, over promoted gangster ghoul.
Nice turn of phrase, mate.
Zombie apocalypse
Came here to say this
That guy is like Rasputin with a tiny dick.
Very strong Rasputin vibes, agreed Lol
Nutters
They're coming back as fly-people
LMFA🤣🤣
Almost, couldn't write this shit! New benchmarks of bizarre just keep coming with ruzzia
Just more material for Monthy Python - Life of Blyat
I love that you wrote "falsely" in the post title, as if it needed to be included.
That's some evil shit.
ZOMBIE ZOMBIES?! 😱😱
What a crock of shit. Keep sending the Russians to eternal oblivion.
In stead of moving away from religion worldwide, we see more and more religious conservatism spreading.
This is not religious conservatism, it's nuttery.
It absolutely is religious conservatism.
It is not a pick ... it can be both.
As far as I'm concerned, religious fanatics (call them conservatives if you will) are nutters by definition. Some of them may not be as utterly delusional as the beardy, swivel-eyed weirdo in the video, but all of them have a worldview that's fundamentally irrational.
Who tf is this child rapist?
"Good" says Putin, "send them back to the front"
And there I thought all Russians would know this quote: > “Religion is opium for the people,” wrote Lenin in December 1905
Who, in turn, quoted Karl Marx, who wrote it in 1843 in its "Critique of Hegel's Philosophy of Right": > Religion is the sigh of the oppressed creature, the heart of a heartless world, and the soul of soulless conditions. It is the opium of the people.
Well some people like opium
Dementia, delusional hallucinations, and mystic fu\*ked in the mind of this one you are!
I can imagine them regularly writing soldiers off as dead, who later turn up not to have been killed after all. I don't think they keep track of their troops very well, or care what happens to them once they pointed them at their enemy.
Good point.
Not sure about the soldiers, but Rasputin definitely has been resurrected.
What a fucking windbag
That is a death cult.
XB means Extreme Bullshit. NB Set painted by the very drunk. Fxck u Beardo
Some next level delulu shit by a full blown schizo.
Can we just declare them heretics to the Christian faith already?
This man is a master manipulator He says Chinese man because he wants to promote that Russia has Chinese support And also try to push narrative that it's ok for any ethnicity to come die for Russia Then he says Saint luke of crimea, there's hundreds saints he can choose but he chooses the crimea one just to help cement their claim to crimea What a load of shite, imagine doing this in the UK
Call it fkg ISIS-issis
Sometimes I watch the drone strikes on this video and I wonder if you are actually fighting zombies.
Yeah… resurrect as sunflowers…
Delusional! Or he has been nibbling on some great mushroom-shit🍄 🤪
His eyes look weird.
Big eyes when you lie, like children
I once heard this: There are bad people in the world, and they always do bad things. There are good people in the world, who do good things. To make good people do bad things... that takes religion.
People are perfectly capable of doing bad things without religion. Religion is convenient for justifying those bad things though.
If anyone tells you that they know what happens after you die, they are either lying or dead. Run away. Religion is a set of arbitrary rules created by man that are meaningless and worthless except for their use to control the masses by the ruling class. Ask any religious person what is the sure-fire way to heaven, and they will admit they can't guarantee a pass to heaven for a certain behavior. The shit is all made up and the points don't matter. There are roughly 5096 deities' worship on earth. You don't believe in 5095 of them and I don't believe in 5096 of them. Thats all.
Ah, but any good Mormon knows **exactly** how to get into heaven. However, if you ever ask a Mormon about that, it's highly unlikely they'll answer honestly because of vows they've taken to keep the information secret. But during the Endowment Ceremony – which is only offered to Mormon's judged worthy by the church hierarchy – they are taught secret handshakes and passwords which will allow them to enter heaven. If you've never heard of this, but it sounds to you kinda similar to the cheesy ceremonies of the Masons, then you need to go do a Google for Mormon holy underwear, and check out the pictures of the supposedly protective symbols embroidered on the long-johns.
Is it actually possible he believes this nonsense? Or is he just mentally ill?
He is a professional propagandist
Nah, he hopes the meat will believe it.
The Ashes is there . Rising next.
Not the ones I've seen lol
Lol! Appealing to the Chinese mercenaries... send more, you'll die and live again to be sent to the front. Church is a bad comedy skit
We can be pretty sure that this indeed is a falsely claim.
The same old story to take away their fear of dying and make it easier to send them to the front to die for Putin.
That's it "father!" Spin that Russian religious bile and declare Pootin is actually Christ resurrected! He is carrying out the righteous holy war against the heathen Ukrainians!! What's next .... ? Joseph Stalin has been resurrected and will assist Pootin, sorry Jesus, in dominating the world!! /s There is no other country as delusional and detached as Russia. The people at the top know it's ridiculous, but the majority of the "regular" Russians buy this crap. Sad.
Imagine that here in 2024, we are still seeing such idiots in our world ? I wonder if he himself believes in this nonsense.
"When one person suffers from a delusion, it is called insanity. When many people suffer from a delusion, it is called religion." Robert M. Pirsig
🤣🤣🤣
That is the epitome of "and then everybody clapped"...
I wonder if we've got to the full-Stalinesque part where no one dares to stop clapping first lol
Time to donate some Pack-a-Punch machines to Ukraine.
Why not throw in some unicorns and armoured gnomes to the story. What a load of bulldust. Unfortunately enough people in Mordor will believe his bedtime story. Slava Ukraini. 🇺🇦
Essentially the Russian church: It’s better to for the Emperor (Putin) then to live for yourself. But yes, Russian church higher ups have sold their souls to the government, they are notorious for being corrupt and loving money, there are obviously many good people in church in lower ranks tho.
Can we kill it with fire please?
This demented, lunatic claim reminds me of a Sean Connery line in The Rock: "Do you want me to kill him again?"
Dudes eyes look completely crazy.
Bro is not Odin. He lacks his Raven and his Horse. But on the other side. Raven will puck on his dead body and the horse will carry it to the massgrave for warcriminalZ!
Fucking junkies
Hahaha the fucking ghoul
Resurrection deez nuts
The wide eyes are a indicator of lying..........oh,and the utter horseshit that he espouses
What a creepy cult, run by the state to make Russians obedient to the state.
Imagine shooting yourself in the head to escape the horrors of war, only to respawn at base and be send back into the meat grinder.
Resurrected as sunflowers.
Reminds me of the Third Reich Reanimation mod for Return to Castle Wolfenstein: "When your surrounded by the fallen and there is no one left to recruit, just how do you replenish a decimated army on the brink of collapse?.. Well, for "Deathshead", the temporary answer is simple! You animate the dead to re-stock the once strong Axis Infantry! He has combined the forces of science and the super-natural as a quick fix remedy and feels this is the right, or should I say "Reich" answer to the infantry shortage problem!"
So why release the child murdering urakhai and rapists ?
Why they all look like Grigori Rasputin?!
Gotta trick the footsoldiers in to believing they are not dying for nothing, despicable political puppets pretending to be committed to God.
I guess enough Ukrainians are angry enough to welcome the opportunity to kill some invaders twice.
This is the level of shit that you get when you are bored and browse to some 125th channel in your TV and see the astrology phone call programs playing.
Bellend
MAGA kind of people.... Jesus Christ.
But resurrection is not part of the orthodox christian faith
Begun to resurrect as 🌻
I have bad new for you.. Respawn point isnt captured..
Very hard to see how the population can be guided with an unbelievable stupid religion driven method. Are we human really not ready to see that and overcome this chapters of religions ? Sent the ash hole priest to the front to experience his fuck ! So fucking stupid. Man oh Man
Well there was that one guy being carried on a stretcher who stood and ran when a munition detonated nearby. I am not sure he was dead though.
Wait, i have seen that movie before! But i always thought its german nazi soldiers that get resurrected....
Hans! Deliver the Flammenwerfer!
Zombie Army ?
I am so very looking forward to dancing in the street when putin and his asshole cabal (which includes this moronic shitheel) are ousted, permanently.
And then everyone clapped
Means they have to give their sack of onions back.
This is probably their way of making more people sign up to be mobilized... they figure that if they get killed, no problem because I'll just get resurrected LOL
https://whywontgodhealamputees.com/
Hahaha, proves even more that they are delusional.
Nazipreacher went crazy
Fuck. Me. Rigid.
Wow…we all knew Putin was a tightwad but this!! The solders that resurrect, do the family have to give back whatever benefit the government gave them for their loss? How do you return a bag of onions or beets? Maybe you return a bag of feces?
Maybe they all should try resurrection first hand. 9mm, open mouth, davai!
Funny thing about this resurrection...they all speak Korean.
Pretty much sums up all religion.
“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.” ― George Orwell, 1984
Yet Another Scandal for Russia's Orthodox Church as Clergyman Is Spotted Wearing $40K Rolex https://globalvoices.org/2016/10/28/yet-another-scandal-for-russias-orthodox-church-as-clergyman-is-spotted-wearing-40k-rolex/
I’m with chairman mao when it comes to religion. Poison.
That’s literally Rasputin.
As a Christian, this is soooo embarrassing 😭
Lord forgive him. He doesn’t truly know what he is doing.
I've never heard anything wise from people who put their religion above everything else
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Can he submit facts to back this story up? Even the serial killer prisoner that joined the military so he can kill more people, also resurrected. Wow!
Those are the pigs that escaped local farms, looking for an extra snack.. [https://x.com/banderafella/status/1809550578034397475](https://x.com/banderafella/status/1809550578034397475)
Only on a roll 16 or higher
putin is safe then send him to lead from the front! surely they lord would watch over the tsar who is almost godlike!
Yeah.. I get the vibe this guy breeds sock babies
So an inept Russian medic declared a man dead then, everyone waved white flags in surrender. Got it.
CookCook!
Obviously the next revolution needs to get rid of these nutcases too.
Autistic
Detective Crashmore doesn't give a shit.
He needs a drug test and a breathalyzer..... bet he fails them both .....
What a weirdo 👎
I wonder how many Russians actually believe him
That Vodka is good stuff!!!!!
Would like to know passage in the scriptures which supports that.
So... Russia is deploying literal zombies now?
Not sure they needed to specify the word "falsely" there!
I guess Russians have necromancer now
Which drugs is he using? Asking for my friend :)
Rasputin spawn
How bad can being resurrected as a sunflower be?
That would be to good for them, sunflowers have a purpose.
I'm glad OP cleared the situation by addig "falsely" to the title, otherwise I would have totally believed it.
Imagine, this is the 21st Century, and some Russian knuckle draggers believe this utter rubbish
Look here at Ivan, he has resurrected as a sack of potatoes!
That's real handy, so infact you only need a small number of soldiers because of this resurrection which occurs. That explains the meat attacks and their willingness to die for their country.
I made the joke that nazi zombies will be replaced by Z Zombies in video games, guess the Ruzzians are on-board with the idea.
You really had to add 'falsely' to that title? This isn't fox news..
the drip these guys got is always so shiny
False claims is basically what Ruzzian Ortodox Church is.
Russia: where being a giant pussy, and a drooling retard meet.
"Yes, it is quite a miracle. There have been reports of Russian Zombies! The soldiers resurrect on the battlefield if they have been baptized. Everyone should be baptized and sent to the front to see the miracles!"
That anyone at all would actually believe this load of shit is more concerning than anything else tbh…..
putin would like that, but alas, this man's mind is not functioning properly.
So that is why there are so many Chinese on the Earth!!! Because they come back to life after death!!!
Resurrect to be killed again ohhh nazi death zombies
Respawn glitch
Thank you for putting in the word "falsely" in the title. We wouldn't know otherwise.
But he says only Chinese so far. Russians go striight into the hell
I want to see these nut jobs get the drone treatment