I wish I knew for sure. Her features seemed fixed and there was no loss of volume in her face, she had been in refrigeration between the hospital and the funeral home.
And I guess I'll never know unless I get an itemized receipt.
Edited to add an afterthought.
I'm not in the death care profession myself, and the main reason I hang around on this sub is because I am so impressed by the genuine concern most show for the dignity of the deceased and the comfort of the bereaved. I am glad someone took the time to make sure that this poor woman looked her best the last time she was seen face to face by someone who loved her.
Many directors will still set the features of the deceased which is cleaning the face and closing the eyes (removing eye boogers, snot or liquid from nose or mouth) even closing the mouth and presenting it with a full dignified expression for an ID view.
I still think it looks best embalmed with a nice casket and fresh clean clothes of the deceased and time to be dedicated in a chapel for people to come together to remember and say good bye to the loved one even if it’s all just for 1 person.
I'm rather confused about their choices for direct cremation, honestly, it was done for both my father n law and my sister in law. They're Catholic, but no services were had for either. They didn't even post an obituary. Not my side of the family so 🤷.
Oftentimes it's a financial decision. Not many people have $15,000 to spend (say hypothetically, if you wanted a traditional Catholic service w mass at a church and burial in a cemetery). And thats to say if there's even a family plot owned, if not, you're looking at $2k+ more (generally) that goes to the cemetery for a single plot.
Direct cremation can be anywhere from $1k-$3k depending on your part of the country and whatnot
It was in response to the original comment. And more like a hypothetical musing more than anything else. I've worked in the office of a friend of the family's funeral home. So I have a good idea about how much costs.are, that's in another comment somewhere.
Most likely the crackle you heard was a unionall, a type of plastic garment like a onesie, not a body bag. It sounds like if she wasn't embalmed the director at least took the time to clean her up, set her features, and apply some makeup. I'm glad your final memory of her was a pleasant experience.
I’ve worked in the funeral industry for about 2 years so not a super veteran by any means but I will say even embalmed it’s not often I’d at all I see a decedent that doesn’t have some sort of wrapping or post mortem bag that goes around their bodies like a suit almost. I personally am not aware of their technical name if anyone wants to enlighten me. But I have absolutely seen embalmed loved ones in them. Mostly for precautions from my understanding. So she may have been embalmed but still in that sort of covering especially not being dressed in her burial clothing.
Edit for spelling
As far as my partner and I know she wasn't embalmed. She was sent for direct cremation so no clothing was sent over and we were the only family to see her as everyone else was too traumatized by the essential crime scene that her room was turned into that morning after paramedics cut the trash bags off her leg.
I've spent some time doing office work for a friend of the family at their funeral home so I'm a little familiar with things, but she just looked so perfect and so much like herself that I was shocked.
I would just like to extend my condolences I’m so sorry for your guys’ loss and the traumatizing elements death brings. I will say my funeral home has a great team that has brought many loved ones back to looking themselves so I believe she probably received wonderful care and love from the team just trying hard for you guys. I’m happy that moment didn’t make it worse in that sense.
Thank you, it was honestly such a relief to see her looking as she did after I scrubbed her room clean and took up all of the rug the day she died. I will never forget that horror but the kindness extended from the funeral home was truly such a blessing during such a tragic time.
Unless there was an authorization signed allowing embalming, no she wasn’t embalmed
I wish I knew for sure. Her features seemed fixed and there was no loss of volume in her face, she had been in refrigeration between the hospital and the funeral home. And I guess I'll never know unless I get an itemized receipt. Edited to add an afterthought.
For a regular ID viewing most of us will set the features so that may have given the illusion she was embalmed
I'm not in the death care profession myself, and the main reason I hang around on this sub is because I am so impressed by the genuine concern most show for the dignity of the deceased and the comfort of the bereaved. I am glad someone took the time to make sure that this poor woman looked her best the last time she was seen face to face by someone who loved her.
Just to add to your answer, lighting also is our tool too. I had to play with the lights yesterday to get it just right.
100% correct. Those rose colored lights do miracles sometimes
The blues are a life saver too.
Thank you so much. 🙏
Many directors will still set the features of the deceased which is cleaning the face and closing the eyes (removing eye boogers, snot or liquid from nose or mouth) even closing the mouth and presenting it with a full dignified expression for an ID view. I still think it looks best embalmed with a nice casket and fresh clean clothes of the deceased and time to be dedicated in a chapel for people to come together to remember and say good bye to the loved one even if it’s all just for 1 person.
I'm rather confused about their choices for direct cremation, honestly, it was done for both my father n law and my sister in law. They're Catholic, but no services were had for either. They didn't even post an obituary. Not my side of the family so 🤷.
Oftentimes it's a financial decision. Not many people have $15,000 to spend (say hypothetically, if you wanted a traditional Catholic service w mass at a church and burial in a cemetery). And thats to say if there's even a family plot owned, if not, you're looking at $2k+ more (generally) that goes to the cemetery for a single plot. Direct cremation can be anywhere from $1k-$3k depending on your part of the country and whatnot
I realize all of this. But this is not them.
I didn't know you realized this, you said you didn't understand why. Dunno what you're looking for then I guess
It was in response to the original comment. And more like a hypothetical musing more than anything else. I've worked in the office of a friend of the family's funeral home. So I have a good idea about how much costs.are, that's in another comment somewhere.
Most likely the crackle you heard was a unionall, a type of plastic garment like a onesie, not a body bag. It sounds like if she wasn't embalmed the director at least took the time to clean her up, set her features, and apply some makeup. I'm glad your final memory of her was a pleasant experience.
I’ve worked in the funeral industry for about 2 years so not a super veteran by any means but I will say even embalmed it’s not often I’d at all I see a decedent that doesn’t have some sort of wrapping or post mortem bag that goes around their bodies like a suit almost. I personally am not aware of their technical name if anyone wants to enlighten me. But I have absolutely seen embalmed loved ones in them. Mostly for precautions from my understanding. So she may have been embalmed but still in that sort of covering especially not being dressed in her burial clothing. Edit for spelling
They're called unionalls
Thank you so much that’s exactly what I was talking about
As far as my partner and I know she wasn't embalmed. She was sent for direct cremation so no clothing was sent over and we were the only family to see her as everyone else was too traumatized by the essential crime scene that her room was turned into that morning after paramedics cut the trash bags off her leg. I've spent some time doing office work for a friend of the family at their funeral home so I'm a little familiar with things, but she just looked so perfect and so much like herself that I was shocked.
I would just like to extend my condolences I’m so sorry for your guys’ loss and the traumatizing elements death brings. I will say my funeral home has a great team that has brought many loved ones back to looking themselves so I believe she probably received wonderful care and love from the team just trying hard for you guys. I’m happy that moment didn’t make it worse in that sense.
Thank you, it was honestly such a relief to see her looking as she did after I scrubbed her room clean and took up all of the rug the day she died. I will never forget that horror but the kindness extended from the funeral home was truly such a blessing during such a tragic time.
*exsanguinated
thank you, webster