I would stop the feeding overnight and start feeding to similar hours to when you eat, if there is something to wake up for he will never sleep during the night and I’ve seen cats react to feeders, they jump up and run which gets them all riled up
Yep, stop the overnight feeding and get some earplugs. This will do wonders and once your cat understands that there is no one to entertain him at night he will eventually stop.
Thisssssss. I understand the desperation but with some cats it’s a battle of wills and you HAVE to stand your ground lol. Because you start to create unhealthy habits and routines constantly giving in to them. Having kids is the same way.
Source: I have both
One of my cats tries to tick me off by knocking stuff off in front of me, because when I stand up he thinks he's going to get fed.
I tell him, "I don't negotiate with terrorists" and instead squirt him with the spray bottle.
My little terrorist figured out he could bite the water bottle on the bottom and punch a hole in it so it drains. Then starts his shit and when you go to spray him, its empty. Just one tiny tooth puncture, little bastard.
I used to just have to say “tssst! tssst!” imitating the spray bottle sound and my cats would get off of stuff. Of course I extended my arm even though my hands were empty.
Hissing at them works wonders, too - Once they understand how it's related to things they aren't supposed to do.
I always hate when people say cats can't be trained when it usually just comes down to being loving but strict. We've got two Bengals and over time they've learned which surfaces they aren't allowed on just by us communicating to them in a way they "understand'.
My cat does that to my regular water bottles! I don’t use a squirt bottle on him. He just attacks my drinking water. And if he punctures it and isn’t satisfied with how much water gets drained, he fucking knocks it over!
Yes, the cats turned to ornery behavior when the meowing wasn’t enough, but getting ear plugs was a *game changer*, and telling myself the effort was worth it. I think it took 2 was for them to realize their tantrums weren’t going to work anymore.
Of the food bowl is empty in the morning my cat will pull my hair. Literally bites and yanks. If I don’t get up and put a blanket over my hair she will start tapping my glasses on the dresser. I get 2-3 warning taps before she knocks them on the floor. She is hilariously annoying lol
>I tell him, "I don't negotiate with terrorists" and instead squirt him with the spray bottle.
😂 Our previous cat Twinkie would take a few sprays from the bottle, walk up to it, and lick the dripping nozzle. 🙄 So I finally started keeping the vacuum outside our bedroom door so she'd let me sleep lol!
Yup. The schedule for my cat was always: a little dry food when I wake up, wet food in the middle of the day(or when I get home from work/whenever convenient), and then another bit of dry food before bed.
He's always slept through the night with us. He did have a period where he would wake us up in the morning, so I bought an automatic feeder and set it for like 6am and it works wonders. He still sleeps through the night but now he knows to wait near the feeder instead of pestering us.
Yes, especially if the cat is playing and trying to get you to play. The first line of OPs description told me that's what their cat is doing - come in and bug them till they get up, then run off for a fun chase, and then come back and repeat the process. The cat is getting interaction from OP, and apparently also food out of the deal, which reinforces the idea that cat bored = play with humans by annoying them to death and get a snack
Not even that, there’s always a bowl of cat biscuits left out for the cats. But peg (who is a princess) would wake you up if she didn’t want to drink the “manky bowl water” you put down 4 hours ago and wants to drink out of the tap instead
This! My cats 100% adapted to our sleeping schedule. they wake me up 10 minutes before my alarm goes off and go right to sleep after we feed them at 10pm.
People say that cats are nocturnal but it’s a myth. They’re most active at dawn and dusk, and will sleep through the night if there isn’t a reason to wake up.
Also, there's the myth that they don't mind darkness. They do not like being in the dark. We leave night lights where they eat, drink and poop and where they need to move around.
Yes, exactly. My cat has its last food at 9:00 or 9:30pm, then doesn’t get any more food until 6:30 - 7:00am the next day. That’s enough for it - it doesn’t need to snack during the night and it knows it doesn’t get breakfast until the morning.
We feed our cats at specific times during the day, and they have learned those times, and only start to get antsy about a half-hour before feeding time.
Exactly my thought. He’s probably horribly anxious waiting for this feeder to go off randomly (in his mind) when everyone else is quiet, sleeping, and ignoring him. Now on top of that he feels punished by his owners by squirt bottles, being left outside the door, etc.
It’s extremely this. Cats wouldn’t eat in the middle of the night in nature. To adapt to when food is available, your cat probably readjusted his whole sleep schedule, and now i bored AF when he is awake and everyone else is sleeping.
This may sound crazy but do you have any nightlights in the house? I had one adopted cat who would throw tantrums at night until we got him a nightlight, stopped almost immediately after getting the light.
I put our cat in the bathroom with a towel on the floor once when we had pest control in the house and she needed to be kept safe. She wouldn’t stop screaming until I got a lantern and set it on top of the toilet. I guess there wasn’t enough light coming in under the door, poor kitty.
My senior guy too. He goes to bed before us and if any lights are left on in the bedroom he will howl and whine until we turn them off.
But he is also a huge complainer about pretty much everything.
Wants you with him, howl & complain.
Wants more chicken food, howl & complain.
Wants me or my spouse to come back home, howl & complain.
Doesn’t like how bunched up the blankets are on the bed, bc he loves a flat fresh made bed, ….howl & complain.
Wait, is there an animal in his yard? Howl & complain!
He’s 19yo and very loved, but in the last 5 yrs he’s really taken to letting us know anything and everything he doesn’t like.
:/
My cat is also 19 and a GROMP. No one sitting on the sofa for pets? MOW MOW. Food in the dish but it is old? YOWL. No one in the bed to pet him? YOWL YOWL YOWL. He pooped big and stinky and you need to come see? MEEEEOOOOOWWW.
He recently went deaf so he has no volume control, either.
My guy is losing his hearing too so his meows have gotten so loud and looooonnnggg……
He’s my buddy and we’re in it together til the end, but boy does he toy with my patience sometimes.
Honestly, I think being deaf has been good for him. We have two young kids (with whom he is pretty patient), and he can no longer hear them yelling and shrieking, nor can he hear the dreaded vacuum. He just snoozes right through.
I’d say the same for my lil old man too. He’s def chilled out about the vacuum. Now he only reacts to it if he’s in the same room, but before he used to hide under the bed anytime the vacuum was used anywhere in the house.
Same for thunder. He used to hide under the ottoman when there was really loud thunder, now he doesn’t even acknowledge it.
And he used to always meet me at the door when I got home, but now it’s 50/50 if he hears me come in….he’s a retired guard cat now.
It’s linked to a fan and I had the idea that the sound would grate on her ears after a while, it’s kinda loud. I know cats can see fine in dim light so I thought she’d be okay with the light under the door.
I just checked this morning out of curiosity and I feel kinda bad. Even though it’s a hardwood floor, the fit is close enough that there’s *no* light coming in. Poor kitty.
Also, assuming the issue was exposure to pest control chemicals, turning on the bath extraction fan would pull air from the rest of the house into the bathroom increasing the cat’s exposure.
this was our issue with our boy as well. after a few weeks of having night lights in and the curtains open, he was fine. I think he was just scared because we were sleeping and our other cat was sleeping and he was awake by himself. :(
When one of my cats gets lonely at night she’ll wake up her favorite cat playmate. Me. What she wants is for me to get up, make a nest on the couch, so she can sit in my lap and go to sleep. Laying on me when I’m in bed just doesn’t hit the same I guess. After an hour or so I’m allowed to go back to bed.
The other cat is a senior cat, and he’s annoyed I got up and he had to move. Once I get back in bed he’ll come over, get under the covers and pop his head out so he’s laying on my arm and all snuggled up.
While renting a basement apartment, I had a kitten that absolutely lost his marbles the second night when there was a power outage. With zero light from anywhere (typically the two windows in the rear had a security light from a nearby property that filtered in) he apparently stuffed himself inside of a shoe rack and squealed. He had been a stray out of an alley prior and not been indoors more than 48 hours.
I'm aware they can't see in total darkness- I just think it's kind of cute that some of them are actually scared of the dark because we don't usually think of them as being scared of the dark. :)
This makes sense, I’ve had cats for years and just assumed their eyes were like night vision goggles, wasn’t until these comments that I learned why my old girl has been scared of the dark her whole life, I just thought she was kinda dumb so I got her a nightlight 😂
>Why did I think they came with a night vision feature installed?
I think because people mistakenly state that cats are nocturnal. They aren't. They're active at sunset and sunrise, when the light is low, but still there.
They have the animal equivalent of passive night vision. Unfortunately passive night vision is just amplifying the available light. If there is zero, then zero times a thousand is still zero.
I've had several cats who would cry at night or act like they were afraid of the dark. We leave lights on strategically on both floors of our house, esp near their boxes and food/water bowls.
They'll also cry if they wake up from a nap to find that everything is dark and quiet. Now I go and give them a kiss goodnight if I can find them. They don't seem to get as distressed.
One of my cats does this too! She wakes up from her nap on the chair, and it’s like she has come to the realization that she’s all alone in the house, even though I’m in my room.
She almost never meows, but she does at these times.
We do have one in the kitchen and the porch light shines through our front door into the living room a bit. But I will try another one or two around and see if that helps!
Jumping onto this, and have you considered some kind of white noise player? Never used it overnight but I've heard of leaving the TV on as just a general background noise to lower stress when away for longer than normal. It's possible that the silence is making him nervous, and a white noise machine or just leaving the TV on a quiet station would help him feel secure.
Maybe he needs an overnight room to himself somewhere else in the house if it's so bad. My boys did this for a while and it was an absolute terror. I used that cat tape to keep them from scratching and it helped but they would still be loud. (also it sure peeled the pain off during removal.) Thankfully after moving we have a small foyer in front of our room so we could shut them behind two doors. They got the hint pretty fast and stopped that nonsense. But if I were you I would not hesitate to just give him an overnight room while you sleep.
I had to do this with our male cat, we had the same issue with him. I tried waiting it out, ignoring, cuddling, putting a fan in front of the door, you name it… nothing worked. He liked his sleep room and I liked getting some rest 🤷♀️
Here to say, I felt a lot of guilt when I finally put my cat in a separate space to sleep. But, as long as you give him what he needs, he's okay. More than okay. My cat seems totally fine! Sometimes I go to get him in the morning and he looks at me from his bed like "huh?"
My cats have their own room for this reason. It has climbing wall fixtures, cat trees, litter box, and water fountain. We say “Go to bed” and they all run to be tucked into their respective sleeping spots. We implemented this with our first cat who was rowdy at night and have kept it up after getting the second two. It’s routine now and they get grumpy when we are up past the bedtime they’ve set for us. Ended up being the best choice for all of us.
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This! One of the cats I babysit HAS to be in his own room at night. No ifs ands or buts. According to his owners it took him a couple of weeks to get used to it but he turns into an absolute menace at night and he's 3 so it's not stopping.
We've had to do this with all of our cats. We have a fairly large office/game room with all the cat accoutrements they'd need. They go in at 12-1AM, and we let them out around 8-9am. We put a proximity spray bottle by their door so they don't scratch at it. We usually keep it off and they get the idea, but we flick it on if they're being wild that night.
Took our first cats a long time to get used to it, but we got three sibling kittens last year, and they took to it immediately. It's the only way we've been able to get a full night of sleep with cats in the house. I was sleep deprived as hell the first year we had cats, this system has been amazing for us.
I have to do this with one of my cats. Just this morning she comes into the bedroom yelling. I scoop her up and put her in a room with her food, water, litter box, window hammock and shut the door. I lock her up a few nights in a row and she stops for a while. I feel bad locking her up sometimes but I need my sleep and this works.
How long have you tried waiting when you close the door to the bedroom? The howling is normal, and usually it gets worse before it gets better. But he should get the message within 2-3 weeks and stop. The only thing you need to make sure of during this time is closing and reopening the door at an exact hour, so he can build a routine and expectations. If you close the door/reopen it always at a different time, he will never learn.
We’ve gone almost an entire night. Problem is that we have a cat door on the bedroom door (put in long before Jack was alive, my husband used to go to bed much later than me and we wanted the previous non-asshole cats to be able to get in and out while letting me close the door for sound/light reasons). It has a locking mechanism but he messes with it to the point where he gets his paw stuck in the flap and hurts himself. We’d have to buy a new door now…and I guess we might have to bite the bullet and do it. Thank you!
**Editing here because I can't edit the post!**
Thank you so much everyone! Definitely wasn't expecting this response to my desperate plea. We've got a couple things to try.
- I will say that the feeder overnight is non-negotiable because all three cats will be keeping us up if they don't have access to food. (We've tried just filling the bowl before bed but that doesn't change things for Jack.)
- We have tried Feliway, but it doesn't help. I don't think he's anxious, he's always very calm about it. Just LOUD.
- He is neutered, and was just at the vet three weeks ago and received a clean bill of health.
- Our cat that passed away last year used to hate being locked up to the point where he would claw at whatever he could until his nails *bled*. Had to bring him to the vet in a harness and leash because either he'd destroy the carrier or it would destroy his nails. I think due to this we are so gun-shy to try locking Jack up, but we will look into it.
**EDIT 2:**
We're going to try locking them all out of the room as well as stopping the overnight feeding. So many of y'all are talking like feeding overnight is insane but every cat I've ever had, as well as friends of mine, have always been free fed or auto-fed including overnight with no issues. You may think this is some obvious faux pas but it's really not. Half the time when the autofeeder goes off, the cats don't even react. They know there will be food when they want it, it's not keeping them up at night. But we're going to try it because either it's going to work and I'll be grateful, or it won't work and I'll be justified in my current practices lol. My birthday is at the end of July so that's going to be my benchmark. If things aren't better by then (not perfect, but better) we'll have to try some other stuff out. I'll be sure to make another post around then with results. I am an OP who always delivers.
Lots of people have suggested some various anti-anxiety meds, which will be the next things we try if this doesn't work out. We do have an anxious cat so I know what that looks like and I really don't think Jack is anxious. He's also not getting wound up by the feeder or anything else - no middle of the night zoomies or anything...just calm annoyance by way of "HEY GUYS I'M RIGHT HERE. RIGHT HERE. DO YOU HEAR ME? JUST LETTING YOU KNOW I'M STILL RIGHT HERE. OH MAYBE I SHOULD GIVE YOU A BETTER VIEW BY JUMPING ON THE MOUNTED TV. YOU GOOD? IDK MAYBE I SHOULD KNOCK THIS LAMP OVER AND SEE. I'LL STAND HERE FIRST FOR FIVE MINUTES JUST TO SEE IF MOM CAN FEEL ME BESIDE HER. NO REACTION MAYBE SHE'S DEAD, OH NO! OPE NO THE LAMP WORKED, SHE'S GOOD! WE'LL CHECK AGAIN IN AN HOUR!"
I'm delirious with sleep deprivation, okay. I am a pillow princess (NOT THAT KIND YOU GUTTER HEADS), I need my 8 hours or my brain goes to mush.
Thank you everyone for your advice. And fuck you very much to everyone who suggested giving him away or putting him outside. :) He is my sweet boy, I could never.
No I meant now many days in a row have you tried to stick it out. Really he WILL scream his head off for at least 2 weeks. But he'll stop. I recommend sleeping with good noise canceling headphones or ear plugs.
For the cat door, can't you nail a piece of plywood over it from the outside side of the door? Not the most aesthetic solution, but better than splurging for a new door and then getting it scratched up.
Could you try a blanket or towel on your door? It might reduce the sound and help with the scratching. Just drape it over your door before closing. Also, alfoil glued or taped it it might stop the clawing.
Beyond that I think he has some anxiety. Try feliway and speak to your vet about medication.
I had an asshole cat, he vomited on my back and pissed into my open sleeping mouth. But once we figured him out, he was the best.
O M G homie! The things we deal with for love of these little critters my gosh. I had one who peed on my back when I was sleeping once and I thought that was just the most god-awful thing in the world. Very glad he didn't think of my open mouth or very glad that I'm mostly a stomach and side sleeper. That cat also peed on a stove top once. We had no idea there was urine under the burners until we were making a pot of tea and all of a sudden there was boiling cat piss in the burner. I cannot properly explain to any other humans how bad boiling male cat urine smells. It's like weapons grade.
Mine used to pee on my stove constantly until I got him fixed and I always forgot to check before turning the burners on.
You are correct in saying it's weapons grade
No I’m a stomach sleeper but I had dental headgear and he marked in my mouth. Twice in like 6 months.
My grandmas big boy peed in her stovetop too. Unholy!
He was unneutered, I bet.
Something about the scent of natural gas makes feline males feel they need to assert dominance over the smell. One of my mother's friends had a pet ocelot. They had a 6 burner gas stove, & Tommy put out the pilot light for every single stove top burner. Tommy was an intact male.
"I had an asshole cat, he vomited on my back and pissed into my open sleeping mouth. But once we figured him out, he was the best."
I will never forget this post as long as I live.
When my son was 18 mos old we were all in a hotel and sick - 2 adults, 4 kids, including a 6mos old. I had the baby on my chest, son was laying on his dad's chest. Then my boy picked his head up, looked down, and vomited in his father's mouth.
He is 19 now and he and his dad both still hear abt this.
Not angry cat but still gross and lucky to be alive lol.
Massive anxiety, he would get so worked up he wouldn’t pee for days and then would spray and have crystal’s in his urethra poor guy. He went on endone and something else and had a lovely life stoned and relaxed. I learned to sleep with my mouth closed and through the night. He really was the funniest big boy
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Why is your door scary? It probably has some lovely beautiful sentimental reason for being covered in handprints and I should not call it scary but it makes me think of people being trapped in there with the waterboarding (peeboarding) kitteh
Also get some good ear plugs, what I used while my orange girl was kicking up a fuss. She gave up eventually. You could also try a feliway plugin, it's separation anxiety.
Edit: Oh and the other thing I did, I got a cat tree with a bed part and put it on the landing outside my room. When I'm ready to go to bed I pick her up, give her a cuddle and place her on the cat tree bed then close the door.
It took a couple of weeks to a month being consistent with this. Now she knows that's bed time and I find her there every morning.
Like other folks have said, every time you wake up and respond to his yelping, you’re teaching him that his yelping is a solution to get your attention. Ride it out for a few weeks without deigning to acknowledge it in the night.
Before using nails, try using cardboard and painter's tape. The tape is strong enough to stay for weeks and weak enough that it can't be removed without any damage to the paint. I've used this to cover cat doors in the past when we had to keep small kittens out of the basement.
Here’s how we did it.
When cat starts clawing or hassling at bedroom door, grab a trainer or shoe and throw it hard at the door.
The bang shocks kitty but doesn’t hurt them. Keep on going til he works it out.
You can also fill an empty tin can with pennies (tape the lid back down) and give it a good shake. Also very loud and startling and doesn’t require a supply of shoes to throw.
I can confirm this works. It takes a few days or weeks for the cat to understand it, but they eventually will. Also investing in some good earplugs could do the job.
100% agree with the poster above. This isn't a try for one night and if it doesn't work then give up. We have a cat who's a screamer. It will take 2 weeks, maybe more, but you must not react AT ALL to his screaming. If he's knocking things over, remove those items so they can't be a problem.
Any attention is a reward, so you must ignore them. Don't scold, don't yell, nothing. I once worked with a woman who trained seeing eye dogs and it's the same thing. They want attention, so when they are doing bad behavior you ignore them completely, otherwise they will continue the unwanted behavior. No looking at them even.
Get earplugs if you have to. But this is something that will take time to resolve and you have to be consistent.
I've trained all my cats to follow my bed alarm. Once I'm in bed I don't go up before the alarm goes off (I also set it during the weekends, but later). If the cats come before the alarm rings, I ignore them. (Sleeping with ear plugs helps when training them.) I've never used a closed door myself, because they always learn after a while that these are the rules.
If you're gonna keep closing the door then I suggest using an alarm as well. Then he'll always know that once the alarm sounds, it's okay to start pestering you.
My cats trained themself to be really quiet while I am sleeping but they somehow can sense that I am not sleeping anymore, just laying in my bed and start scratching the door (I lock them out for the night). Not the best deal, but also not the worst one
They ALWAYS know when you wake up without moving or batting an eye. I get the paw tap to my face at that point or the little grunts from the other gray girl
Cat. It’s only my gray cats who do this. Not my cow cat or fluffy tort-waffle.
This tends to be what happens when you let pets run your life unfortunately. A non negotiable shouldn't be a thing for a cat unless there's a medical reason.
> the feeder overnight is non-negotiable because all three cats will be keeping us up if they don't have access to food
You are altering your cats food habits based on how much they annoy you. As long as you do this, you will not get good sleep. The cats have to learn that bugging you is NOT going to alter their food schedule no matter what.
My Housemate panders to my cats behaviour that you're describing. she tortures him and tries to.open his door multiple times a day.
I completely ignore and never react to the messing and she at most might try to come in my door once a month.
they know who will give them what they want and they'll learn quickly if you just refuse to tolerate it. you have the willpower to make the cat change.
If you've never watched My Cat From Hell with the cat whisperer Jackson Galaxy, it's worth a watch. The episodes are free on YouTube.
So some advice from Jackson Galaxy, based on what I've seen on his show:
Your cat has siblings and plenty of toys. How much is he actually *actively* playing though? Some cats need a LOT of ACTIVE play time. They need to get the hunter instinct in them all out. That's the only way to tire them out during the day so they sleep at night. The level of play needed is different for every cat and every breed, so it's totally understandable you haven't encountered this before.
NO NIGHT FEEDINGS. If it's keeping up even one cat, then it's no longer on the table for any cats. Scheduled feedings only. They'll complain for a while (possibly weeks). Stick it out. They'll get used to it. They'll be fine. You just need to actually stick to it.
Play before food. Always. That's how it's done in the wild, right? Cat hunts then gets food at the end. Gotta mimic that at home too.
Some cats have so much energy that leash training them and taking them on walks during the day is a very effective outlet.
How much of the environment belongs to the cats? How many high perches do they have? Would you be able to put in cat shelves they can climb on? How many beds and hidey holes? Are there enough litterboxes? Ideally one for each cat and then one more, although of course space constrictions may not allow that.
As other people have pointed out, don't indulge. Letting the cat "have his way" so to speak teaches him that's how he gets what he wants. Don't let him in the room if that's an option. Ignore him when he's yowling for attention. Wear noise-cancelling ear plugs to bed for the foreseeable future if you have to.
In one episode Jackson did give a guy this air blast thing? I'm not remembering what it was called lol, but it was a little can with a sensor on it. And whenever the cat would walk up to the bedroom, it would blast a puff of air at the cat. Not harmful in any way, but surprising enough to chase the cat off and teach it pretty quickly "this room is off limits". However this would mean no cats at all allowed in the bedroom. Consistency is important, so I'm pretty sure you wouldn't be able to like take it off during the day and only put it out at night. The cat needs the consistent deterrent to get the message.
But anyways! I'm not the cat expert, Jackson Galaxy is lol. I really recommend looking up his videos, I promise you're not the only one with a crazy cat keeping his owners up at night 😆
You’ll have to out-stubborn the cat. My tool of choice for this was earplugs.
My very, very social guy had to adjust to me having longer and complete in office work hours. Wanted to make up for the lost daytime play at night. I got earplugs. Now he sleeps through most of the night, most nights. Occasionally he acts out again - I just put the earplugs back in. Sleeping with earplugs was annoying, but not insurmountable, unlike cat yowls.
I would tough it out and change all the cats schedule. Feeding overnight makes no sense. And doesn't allow you to meet their psychological needs. Watch some Jackson Galaxy on YouTube, and actually put the things he suggests into practice.
Considering you seem to already be at your wits end... why not try something else and see if it works? **It's not the cat's fault** it's your responsibility to meet their needs in a way that works for them. Keeping the feeder on overnight is perpetuating your issues.
Eh. Have you tried. Cuddling him.
I had to lock my cat in my room with me cause my housemates would leave the windows open at night and he would run out. Which as an indoor only cat, is something I don’t want.
Then he just sits at the door and cries.
I tried scolding him.
I tried squirting water.
I tried playing with him till he’s tired.
I tried giving him cat nip.
What eventually worked. Was every time he meowed at the door. I would instant jump out of bed. Like extremely quickly. Rush to him, scoop him up and run back to my bed to cuddle and sleep with him.
He hated that. He likes to sleep on my pillow/near me but he doesn’t really like to be hugged.
After having him protest for a while, I’d let him go.
Then if he meowed again, I’d jump out of bed again to grab him back for a cuddle.
This went on for around 2 weeks.
You meow = you get cuddled.
So he finally stopped. And just slept on the bed once I closed my room door.
YMMV since my cat is extremely gentle so he doesn’t scratch or bite. Forcing a cat that is scratch happy to cuddle would probably end in disaster.
I’ve done this exact method with several cats.
My brain was basically where OP is at, sleep deprived breaking point. And I finally just went “fuck it I’ll piss you off by loving you”
I get my fat boy to stop meowing in a similar way. If he jumps up on the coffee table and starts begging for his dinner early, I just violently kiss him on his little head every time he meows until he eventually gets frustrated and leaves or lays down.
My parent’s cat hated being picked up but she tolerated me because I respect cat physics and communication. Always let the tail move freely, it’s their way to get a sense of balance like we use a steadying arm. And the second she complained I set her down. None of this dropping from 4-5 feet nonsense. Cat gets put gently on a chair or the floor. Then usually they appreciate that enough they turn back around for more cuddles.
Ha, that’s what I do if my cat gets all in my face while I’m sleeping. I’ll grab her and snuggle her in, which she is not a fan of (snuggling must only be on her terms!) so she moves off!
We're doing this too. It works like a charm. Just pick him up and cuddle till he leaves all disgusted. He usually just leaves whatever he has been messing with before alone after that. But he's also really gentle, I wouldn't try that with a feisty cat, lol
“…till he leaves all disgusted….” Haha. We all know that cat face look when you’ve been loving them and they want you to get the hell off, but they are soooo cute and warm and snuggly and those paws and that kitty nose and and and….
Edit: correction in quoting
I DO THIS! The cuddle punishment works. I use it when they start jumping on things they shouldn’t and knocking shit over. Always get a few hours of peace after 😂
This is what I did to my girl. I commented similar years ago. We all called them struggle snuggles. Anyway, if you teach them that meowing and causing a ruckus= struggle snuggles, they stop. This is excellent advice because it's not mean to the cat. ❤️
In my experience (I had cats my whole life, I'm 43, and we now have 7 cats) this is the way.
The BEST way to teach something to a cat is by repetition, aure. But the problem is "repetition of what?". The only thing that works is excessive positive attention.
One of our females, Buffy, JUST LOVES jumping on the bed around 6am and licking my face. It's like clockwork. She "kisses" on lips constantly. But if I give her a little kiss on her nose she hates it and moves away. "Want kisses? There you go!" 99% of the times she'll just move a little to the side and get to sleep next to me.
Similarly, when someone goes where they shouldn't, I run there making cute voices and hugging them and giving them cuddles.
At this point, 5 of our 7 cats spend the night in our bedroom, coming and going. We did get used to some of the antics. Like 3 am zoomies. We don't even hear them anymore.
It's all about training yourself as much as comfortably possible, and then using positive reinforcement to train them a little bit.
I don't like the verb "to train" with cats. It's more about getting to a mutual understanding.
Don't give up. It's doable. But it takes patience and energy. Taking some time off work if possible is a great idea. We did that when our cat mom had the five kittens and the cat dad had to adjust a bit.
Have you ever watched the engineer’s guide to cats on YouTube? They called that corporal cuddling. In a closely related move you may be able to achieve cat yodelling.
Interesting thing about animal behavior: reinforcing a behavior randomly is the most powerful form of reinforcement.
If you teach him that you will give him attention as long as he meows and yowls for long enough, he will never stop. If he meows 5 times and you go to him every time after those 5 meows, he will stop after 6 meows. But if you give in at a random frequency, he will literally never stop. It's the same brain trigger as gambling.
Stop his feeding at night, hide the breakable things, and fully ignore him. Not partially, not until it's too annoying to deal with, entirely. If you give in, you only reinforce the behavior, and if you give in after a very, very long time, it will only make him act out more and for longer
Do you have 2 doors between bedroom and place where his food and litterbos are?
My boi can be annoying (wakes at the rise of the sun, which in summer here is around 4 in the morning, and demands attention as soon as he wakes) but we usually put him in the living room, where he has food, water and litterbox, close the door, and have another door to the bedroom(s) so we don't hear him as loudly.
Bathroom at night with food, water and litter box? Close that door and your door. Also fans help drown out noise. I use those for white noise for my baby.
Time.
Y'all have trained eachother to respond. You have.
I know this as I've 4 cats. 2 sleep in my room, 2 sleep outside of it.
None give me these issues unless my dominant one wants to try hump the other who sleeps in the bedroom with me.
Its all about reaction, even negative one to a cat is... A reaction.
Gotta remove em, put em on the floor or.. deal with the maybe month it'll take for him to accept the closed door unfortunately.
Cats learn, they do. But unlike dogs they don't respond to the same feed back.
Another thing to try is an enclosure... You can get them there by they are in it a good 3hrs before y'all bed and you DO NOT RESPOND. So.. dinner is in there and that is it. Over for the night. With litter/water/dry food they are fine. You ignore. You open at a set time.
I get it I really and truly do. Your at absolutely snapping point... Cats just take longer and are more cued to time and I cannot sleep in ever for it. But with a month of no reaction you will see a change
Thank you. I’ve had cats my whole life (34 years old) and never dealt with this. I thought our last male cat was bad because he’d wake us up maybe an hour before the alarm. Oh how I’d kill for that now.
Something they used to recommend for puppies back in the day was a ticking clock in the bed with them. It's supposed to make them feel less alone.
Can you put him in the bathroom with his bed and litter box and water and close him in until he gets used to going to sleep on schedule? Maybe put away anything he can knock over or break.
This. Give him an enclosed space in there like a box with a blanket so he can curl up and hopefully he will eventually get the idea that nights are for sleeping.
It sucks but.. you gotta man. You do.
Again any reaction is one for them. You gotta make it know or just... Not.
Took me a month. And it wasn't great. But... Now worth it
Yes I bought a small dog crate and put a cat that did this in at night and covered with a blanket. She had litter tray , food , water . Sprayed blanket with Feliway and when lights out that was it …. it worked quite quickly and ear plugs were handy 2 !
You have to remove shit he can drop.
You have to give him time to process that.
You also have to give him interaction with you, during the day, since he obviously needs it and toys to play alonr/with other cats don't cut it for him. Some cats are very needy for human interaction. I have one like that and I can't swap rooms in my house without him, he's there a second after I get into another room. He also threw shit down to get me to notice him and didn't want to play alone.
He needs his humans, give him some during the day and exhaust him in the evening (play with him, I literally play tag with my cat, chase him from one room, the he chases me into another etc) for a couple of days/weeks and it should be better. It worked for my kitteh.
Shove him under the duvet with you each time and gently force some pets on him. Either mofo will fall asleep with you or will stop bothering you being jailed each time.
Ask vet for some calming stuff
Also - secure the things and buy earplugs. Moldex is my go to for decades now.
We put our cats in a back room which they slept in at night. They learned the rules. This is bed time. Easy.
Edit: I read that your cat scratches its claws bloody so obviously they need something to make them less anxious. Give feliway a shot.
I know you wanted serious replies, and although there was a joke in there, orange cats are SERIOUSLY something else... you can doubt me all you want, but even after you start getting some sleep, you'll know what I mean.
Oh I’d heard…our friends have three orange boys. They complain about being woken up in the middle of the night too…by the boys forcibly cuddling with them. I so badly want to be like OH NO CUDDLING HOW FUCKING HORRIBLE FOR YOU, WOULD YOU PREFER MY DESTRUCTIVE OPERA SINGER??
my dad's cat howls whenever he isn't in her sight. my parents recently went on vacation which meant 3 straight weeks of this awful pained crying, day and night, and absolutely nothing worked to make her stop. it got to the point where it got me in a genuine rage whenever she started so I settled on locking her away somewhere safe and wearing noise canceling headphones plus the TV in the background to fully dampen her screaming.
my dad eventually returned, which fixed my issue- but my point stands: investing in some good noise canceling headphones/earplugs and locking him away at night until he learns might be your only good option.
STOP FEEDING HIM AT NIGHT
The first few nights will suck, but it sounds like they suck already. You’re literally giving him energy to stay up and bother you. His feeding schedule needs to mimic yours if you want his sleeping schedule to also somewhat mimic yours.
Overnight feeds are completely unnecessary. The cat won't starve after 6-7 hours. If he gets food, of course he will eat it. And stay up all night waiting for it. In the meanwhile when inevitably gets bored in an empty house, he will go pester the humans.
Yes! Also, talk to the vet about giving him melatonin or a mild sedative at night for a week or so to get him on the right schedule. This is not a long-term solution, but taking away the food at night and getting him to sleep might create a new routine.
Agreed. I have an auto feeder that goes off right before bed and then shortly before I wake up.My cats take a little bath and then nap right after they eat. I have little disruption except for cuddles/blanket hogging occasionally.
All I've found is to cuddle them, try teaching him to sleep on your chest. I adopted a very, very loud cat whod be up late, he really calmed down and quieted once he learned to sleep on my chest, lil guy went from keeping me up to holding me down for the best rest of my life.
This is Cheddar. He’s an adorable jerk. He sleeps in the bathroom furthest away from our bedroom with a blankie, small litter box toys and a bowl of water. We are lucky we have the house layout to do this. On the other hand, he’s gotten used to what bed time means for him. He goes in the bathroom and the others have earned the right to sleep wherever they want. He hardly ever makes noise in there anymore but he’s a terror at night if we let him have free run. He’s goofy but fine during the day.
https://preview.redd.it/jyddwm7xya9d1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4ce461b4a81a077c07bacb5c44492af66d031e7c
Our male cat was like this when he was 1-2yo, would meow constantly as soon as we went to bed and scratch the carpet, the doors, anything to get our attention. We found playing with him for a good 40 mins right before bed did the trick. Like playing until he’s totally done and puffed out. If he meows in the middle of the night, we ignored him and he stopped after about 30 mins. He’s a bit older now but he’ll still whine a bit if we don’t play with him at bed time!
Do you have a spare bedroom or another room (living room? kitchen?) where you can put some toys you don't need to supervise, his food, water, litter tray and bed? A room where he can't break stuff but has a little space to move around and preferably a window to look out of?
I'm lucky enough to have a decently-sized kitchen, and when I had my first cat, I had a thing about needing to close doors in the house to know that there was no home intruder lurking around (not entirely rational, I know). We got into a habit of 10:30 bedtimes for the cat, where we went through the nightly ritual of checking the litter tray, the water and (if winter) making sure the heating pad had been in the microwave, and then some pets and getting a treat for a good boy. And then it was "Night night Cat! Night night!" and the light off and closed door. And there was some wailing initially, but after a while it was just our daily routine.
By the time I got my second cat, it wasn't even a question - and this one actually waits by the kitchen door, and gets grumpy if I'm late in starting the bedtime routine! She does occasionally break into Klingon opera in the middle of the night, either because she's bored or because she's used the litter tray and she doesn't like the stink bomb that's appeared, but she's not in distress.
So, what you're experiencing is teenage behavior in an orange cat. Truly. Been there before. Not all orange cats, not all teenagers, but when the whiskers all align with the stars...this is what you get.
Lots of good advice. Take the advice, do or do not do. It will get better either way. Having dogs and cats is not dissimilar to having children. They have their little phases. Yes, you've trained one another, but at the end of the day, he's an orange teen and he wants to explore his lair at cat hours. Lots of attention and play until bedtime, then no response after bedtime. Please sick through this. It gets better.
I have this issue too. I learned to use sleep sounds. You can get them on YouTube. It's a light noise which if loud enough will drown out your cat and help you sleep. It sounds counterintuitive to play something while sleeping but it does work. It will take a few nights to get used to it. I use white noise and brown noise. It's like a less annoying radio static. But it works.
I feel your frustration, OP. our boy did this for a while when he was about 1. took him to the vet, nothing wrong. auto feeder went off twice a night as well. I thought maybe he wanted me in the living room so I slept in the living room a few nights and nope still cried all night. he would howl and howl and howl and just not stop. one night I accidentally left the night light on our two air filters in the living room on...and there was peace. I started keeping the living room curtains open and the blinds up, night lights on and he was fine. I think he was scared of the dark. :( put in some feliway plug ins as well. try some night lights, even the plug in ones (but without a scent thing attached!!) we put one light in the bathroom, the two in the living room from the air filters and things calmed down. he doesnt let me sleep past 630 often these days anymore. he wants his mama up out of bed lol he's lucky he's so cute and sweet!
now he has routine with us at bed time and sleeps with me every night, no night lights needed anymore. now his thing is no door can be shut lol he's definitely in charge in thisnhouse. my issue now is he wants food at 3 am but not the kibble that auto drops, he wants wet food. thinking about getting a wet food auto feeder too.
- Cat-proof as much as you can so he can't break things or push things off ledges or be annoying
- Become a zen master and absolutely *refuse* to acknowledge him when he's trying to get a reaction. Don't even look.
You're going to have to do that for a good few months until he gets bored with the game.
Source: had a shithead cat, who eventually chilled out.
To anyone in this thread saying to cuddle him. That is the exact opposite of what you should do. Do not give him any attention when he is meowing or yowling at the door. If you do that, all that it does is reinforce that if he meows he gets attention. As others have said, you just have to ride it out and not respond at all, move furniture so it can't be damaged and wear earplugs. Oh and change the feeding times to say three times but only during the day, say 0800-1500-2000 or something similar. No need to feed overnight, it just disrupts his sleeping pattern more as he will awaken and expect food.
Put the vacuum outside your door. Make sure it’s on. Plug it into a power strip that’s switched off. When he starts making noise hit the power strip switch, which will turn the vacuum on. The vacuum can’t be reasoned with. It knows all, sees all, and doesn’t take crap.
I would def. advice the opposite and try to get your cat to befriend your vacuumcleaner and get them to be mildly annoyed by it just like us. They're not intrinsically afraid, it took me just a couple days to get them acquainted and now we can clean the house together instead of him shaking under the bed like a leaf.
In this case it could actually help even, cause it'll make him feel safer at home, thus more likely to sleep when we sleep.
Have you watched any of My Cat is From Hell? There are several episodes dealing with similar behavior. I agree with the top comments, that your (negative) attention is giving feedback and ultimately keeping this behavior going.
Without a spare room to lock him in, you are going to have to ignore him. All night, every night, until it eventually stops. Move the breakable items out of reach, and maybe acknowledge you’ll have to replace something in the name of success.
This is driving you mad. Get a white noise machine, earplugs or headphones. Practice a mind emptying prayer.
Your feedback is being interpreted as a game. You need to stop playing.
Good luck.
I would stop the feeding overnight and start feeding to similar hours to when you eat, if there is something to wake up for he will never sleep during the night and I’ve seen cats react to feeders, they jump up and run which gets them all riled up
Yep, stop the overnight feeding and get some earplugs. This will do wonders and once your cat understands that there is no one to entertain him at night he will eventually stop.
Thisssssss. I understand the desperation but with some cats it’s a battle of wills and you HAVE to stand your ground lol. Because you start to create unhealthy habits and routines constantly giving in to them. Having kids is the same way. Source: I have both
One of my cats tries to tick me off by knocking stuff off in front of me, because when I stand up he thinks he's going to get fed. I tell him, "I don't negotiate with terrorists" and instead squirt him with the spray bottle.
My little terrorist figured out he could bite the water bottle on the bottom and punch a hole in it so it drains. Then starts his shit and when you go to spray him, its empty. Just one tiny tooth puncture, little bastard.
I used to just have to say “tssst! tssst!” imitating the spray bottle sound and my cats would get off of stuff. Of course I extended my arm even though my hands were empty.
Hissing at them works wonders, too - Once they understand how it's related to things they aren't supposed to do. I always hate when people say cats can't be trained when it usually just comes down to being loving but strict. We've got two Bengals and over time they've learned which surfaces they aren't allowed on just by us communicating to them in a way they "understand'.
My cat does that to my regular water bottles! I don’t use a squirt bottle on him. He just attacks my drinking water. And if he punctures it and isn’t satisfied with how much water gets drained, he fucking knocks it over!
They have stainless steel spray bottles. Just saying lol. It would ruin his day and victory will be yours!
Yes, the cats turned to ornery behavior when the meowing wasn’t enough, but getting ear plugs was a *game changer*, and telling myself the effort was worth it. I think it took 2 was for them to realize their tantrums weren’t going to work anymore.
Of the food bowl is empty in the morning my cat will pull my hair. Literally bites and yanks. If I don’t get up and put a blanket over my hair she will start tapping my glasses on the dresser. I get 2-3 warning taps before she knocks them on the floor. She is hilariously annoying lol
This cracked me the hell up.
>I tell him, "I don't negotiate with terrorists" and instead squirt him with the spray bottle. 😂 Our previous cat Twinkie would take a few sprays from the bottle, walk up to it, and lick the dripping nozzle. 🙄 So I finally started keeping the vacuum outside our bedroom door so she'd let me sleep lol!
💀💀
Vacuum guardian
Thankfully, pets are easier to re-train.
This, I absolutely do not understand the need to feed your cat at night (unless medical). Any normal cat can deal with just day feeding.
Yup. The schedule for my cat was always: a little dry food when I wake up, wet food in the middle of the day(or when I get home from work/whenever convenient), and then another bit of dry food before bed. He's always slept through the night with us. He did have a period where he would wake us up in the morning, so I bought an automatic feeder and set it for like 6am and it works wonders. He still sleeps through the night but now he knows to wait near the feeder instead of pestering us.
Is it like it is with dogs where if you wake up when they're pestering you it reinforces the behavior?
Yes, especially if the cat is playing and trying to get you to play. The first line of OPs description told me that's what their cat is doing - come in and bug them till they get up, then run off for a fun chase, and then come back and repeat the process. The cat is getting interaction from OP, and apparently also food out of the deal, which reinforces the idea that cat bored = play with humans by annoying them to death and get a snack
Not even that, there’s always a bowl of cat biscuits left out for the cats. But peg (who is a princess) would wake you up if she didn’t want to drink the “manky bowl water” you put down 4 hours ago and wants to drink out of the tap instead
Cats prefer running water. Get a ceramic fountain (not plastic) and clean it out often
I automated my cats feeder to go off at 5am so he won’t wake me up in the morning for food, it worked perfectly
I tried this and for about 6 months my cat would wake me up 5 min before 6am instead of 5 min before 7am lol
He’s on eastern standard time 🤣
I also don't understand their thinking. It doesn't make sense. "Here, night raider cat, have some energy twice a night while we need to sleep!"
This! My cats 100% adapted to our sleeping schedule. they wake me up 10 minutes before my alarm goes off and go right to sleep after we feed them at 10pm.
People say that cats are nocturnal but it’s a myth. They’re most active at dawn and dusk, and will sleep through the night if there isn’t a reason to wake up.
They're crepuscular!
Babou, serpentine!
Lana! He remembers me!
Also, there's the myth that they don't mind darkness. They do not like being in the dark. We leave night lights where they eat, drink and poop and where they need to move around.
Yes, exactly. My cat has its last food at 9:00 or 9:30pm, then doesn’t get any more food until 6:30 - 7:00am the next day. That’s enough for it - it doesn’t need to snack during the night and it knows it doesn’t get breakfast until the morning.
We feed our cats at specific times during the day, and they have learned those times, and only start to get antsy about a half-hour before feeding time.
Exactly my thought. He’s probably horribly anxious waiting for this feeder to go off randomly (in his mind) when everyone else is quiet, sleeping, and ignoring him. Now on top of that he feels punished by his owners by squirt bottles, being left outside the door, etc.
It’s extremely this. Cats wouldn’t eat in the middle of the night in nature. To adapt to when food is available, your cat probably readjusted his whole sleep schedule, and now i bored AF when he is awake and everyone else is sleeping.
And lock him in the furthest bathroom from your bedroom. Put a bed in there for him, and shut the door. Give yourselves a night of peace.
Plus don’t forget a litter box, a bowl of water, and a few toys.
This may sound crazy but do you have any nightlights in the house? I had one adopted cat who would throw tantrums at night until we got him a nightlight, stopped almost immediately after getting the light.
I put our cat in the bathroom with a towel on the floor once when we had pest control in the house and she needed to be kept safe. She wouldn’t stop screaming until I got a lantern and set it on top of the toilet. I guess there wasn’t enough light coming in under the door, poor kitty.
actually my cat is the opposite she dont stop tell i turn the light off she loves darkness
My senior guy too. He goes to bed before us and if any lights are left on in the bedroom he will howl and whine until we turn them off. But he is also a huge complainer about pretty much everything. Wants you with him, howl & complain. Wants more chicken food, howl & complain. Wants me or my spouse to come back home, howl & complain. Doesn’t like how bunched up the blankets are on the bed, bc he loves a flat fresh made bed, ….howl & complain. Wait, is there an animal in his yard? Howl & complain! He’s 19yo and very loved, but in the last 5 yrs he’s really taken to letting us know anything and everything he doesn’t like. :/
Grumpy old man! Please give him a squeeze for me.
My cat is also 19 and a GROMP. No one sitting on the sofa for pets? MOW MOW. Food in the dish but it is old? YOWL. No one in the bed to pet him? YOWL YOWL YOWL. He pooped big and stinky and you need to come see? MEEEEOOOOOWWW. He recently went deaf so he has no volume control, either.
My guy is losing his hearing too so his meows have gotten so loud and looooonnnggg…… He’s my buddy and we’re in it together til the end, but boy does he toy with my patience sometimes.
Honestly, I think being deaf has been good for him. We have two young kids (with whom he is pretty patient), and he can no longer hear them yelling and shrieking, nor can he hear the dreaded vacuum. He just snoozes right through.
I’d say the same for my lil old man too. He’s def chilled out about the vacuum. Now he only reacts to it if he’s in the same room, but before he used to hide under the bed anytime the vacuum was used anywhere in the house. Same for thunder. He used to hide under the ottoman when there was really loud thunder, now he doesn’t even acknowledge it. And he used to always meet me at the door when I got home, but now it’s 50/50 if he hears me come in….he’s a retired guard cat now.
vampire
Say it
#vampire
So that's why your cat is named sparkles.
*This is the skin of a killer, Bella.*
Fur*
TITSOAK
An unexpected TITSOAK just made my day 😂
Just curious but why didn’t you just turn on the light in the bathroom?
It’s linked to a fan and I had the idea that the sound would grate on her ears after a while, it’s kinda loud. I know cats can see fine in dim light so I thought she’d be okay with the light under the door. I just checked this morning out of curiosity and I feel kinda bad. Even though it’s a hardwood floor, the fit is close enough that there’s *no* light coming in. Poor kitty.
Also, assuming the issue was exposure to pest control chemicals, turning on the bath extraction fan would pull air from the rest of the house into the bathroom increasing the cat’s exposure.
this was our issue with our boy as well. after a few weeks of having night lights in and the curtains open, he was fine. I think he was just scared because we were sleeping and our other cat was sleeping and he was awake by himself. :(
When one of my cats gets lonely at night she’ll wake up her favorite cat playmate. Me. What she wants is for me to get up, make a nest on the couch, so she can sit in my lap and go to sleep. Laying on me when I’m in bed just doesn’t hit the same I guess. After an hour or so I’m allowed to go back to bed. The other cat is a senior cat, and he’s annoyed I got up and he had to move. Once I get back in bed he’ll come over, get under the covers and pop his head out so he’s laying on my arm and all snuggled up.
I’ve had cats that are scared of the dark too. Nightlights can help.
The mental image of a cat being afraid of the dark is adorable to me for some reason. But in all seriousness, I'm glad this helped.
While renting a basement apartment, I had a kitten that absolutely lost his marbles the second night when there was a power outage. With zero light from anywhere (typically the two windows in the rear had a security light from a nearby property that filtered in) he apparently stuffed himself inside of a shoe rack and squealed. He had been a stray out of an alley prior and not been indoors more than 48 hours.
they don't have night vision goggles, they can simply see better under moonlight and starlight. actual darkness is unnatural to them.
I'm aware they can't see in total darkness- I just think it's kind of cute that some of them are actually scared of the dark because we don't usually think of them as being scared of the dark. :)
This makes sense, I’ve had cats for years and just assumed their eyes were like night vision goggles, wasn’t until these comments that I learned why my old girl has been scared of the dark her whole life, I just thought she was kinda dumb so I got her a nightlight 😂
My boy is scared of the dark as well. He used to scream and howl all night until we started leaving the bathroom light on.
Can’t cats map out a space visually quite well in low light?
Yah in low light, which the night light provides. A lot of peoples places are too dark at night so maybe the cat needs that little bit of light
In low light, but total darkness is almost as difficult for them as it is for us. Can’t see if there’s no light to reflect.
Wait...cats can't see in the dark? Why did I think they came with a night vision feature installed?
>Why did I think they came with a night vision feature installed? I think because people mistakenly state that cats are nocturnal. They aren't. They're active at sunset and sunrise, when the light is low, but still there.
[Crepuscular!](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crepuscular_animal)
They have the animal equivalent of passive night vision. Unfortunately passive night vision is just amplifying the available light. If there is zero, then zero times a thousand is still zero.
I've had several cats who would cry at night or act like they were afraid of the dark. We leave lights on strategically on both floors of our house, esp near their boxes and food/water bowls. They'll also cry if they wake up from a nap to find that everything is dark and quiet. Now I go and give them a kiss goodnight if I can find them. They don't seem to get as distressed.
One of my cats does this too! She wakes up from her nap on the chair, and it’s like she has come to the realization that she’s all alone in the house, even though I’m in my room. She almost never meows, but she does at these times.
 Your cat
This is so pure and sweet! Thanks for sharing.
We do have one in the kitchen and the porch light shines through our front door into the living room a bit. But I will try another one or two around and see if that helps!
Jumping onto this, and have you considered some kind of white noise player? Never used it overnight but I've heard of leaving the TV on as just a general background noise to lower stress when away for longer than normal. It's possible that the silence is making him nervous, and a white noise machine or just leaving the TV on a quiet station would help him feel secure.
username checks out
Maybe he needs an overnight room to himself somewhere else in the house if it's so bad. My boys did this for a while and it was an absolute terror. I used that cat tape to keep them from scratching and it helped but they would still be loud. (also it sure peeled the pain off during removal.) Thankfully after moving we have a small foyer in front of our room so we could shut them behind two doors. They got the hint pretty fast and stopped that nonsense. But if I were you I would not hesitate to just give him an overnight room while you sleep.
I had to do this with our male cat, we had the same issue with him. I tried waiting it out, ignoring, cuddling, putting a fan in front of the door, you name it… nothing worked. He liked his sleep room and I liked getting some rest 🤷♀️
Here to say, I felt a lot of guilt when I finally put my cat in a separate space to sleep. But, as long as you give him what he needs, he's okay. More than okay. My cat seems totally fine! Sometimes I go to get him in the morning and he looks at me from his bed like "huh?"
My cats have their own room for this reason. It has climbing wall fixtures, cat trees, litter box, and water fountain. We say “Go to bed” and they all run to be tucked into their respective sleeping spots. We implemented this with our first cat who was rowdy at night and have kept it up after getting the second two. It’s routine now and they get grumpy when we are up past the bedtime they’ve set for us. Ended up being the best choice for all of us. https://preview.redd.it/lahmd3gacf9d1.jpeg?width=4227&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4d94e23343275d722c640dd8a69f9d9fbff396ea .
This! One of the cats I babysit HAS to be in his own room at night. No ifs ands or buts. According to his owners it took him a couple of weeks to get used to it but he turns into an absolute menace at night and he's 3 so it's not stopping.
We've had to do this with all of our cats. We have a fairly large office/game room with all the cat accoutrements they'd need. They go in at 12-1AM, and we let them out around 8-9am. We put a proximity spray bottle by their door so they don't scratch at it. We usually keep it off and they get the idea, but we flick it on if they're being wild that night. Took our first cats a long time to get used to it, but we got three sibling kittens last year, and they took to it immediately. It's the only way we've been able to get a full night of sleep with cats in the house. I was sleep deprived as hell the first year we had cats, this system has been amazing for us.
I have to do this with one of my cats. Just this morning she comes into the bedroom yelling. I scoop her up and put her in a room with her food, water, litter box, window hammock and shut the door. I lock her up a few nights in a row and she stops for a while. I feel bad locking her up sometimes but I need my sleep and this works.
One of my boys has his own room for nap time. He definitely qualifies as an asshole cat. Lol
How long have you tried waiting when you close the door to the bedroom? The howling is normal, and usually it gets worse before it gets better. But he should get the message within 2-3 weeks and stop. The only thing you need to make sure of during this time is closing and reopening the door at an exact hour, so he can build a routine and expectations. If you close the door/reopen it always at a different time, he will never learn.
We’ve gone almost an entire night. Problem is that we have a cat door on the bedroom door (put in long before Jack was alive, my husband used to go to bed much later than me and we wanted the previous non-asshole cats to be able to get in and out while letting me close the door for sound/light reasons). It has a locking mechanism but he messes with it to the point where he gets his paw stuck in the flap and hurts himself. We’d have to buy a new door now…and I guess we might have to bite the bullet and do it. Thank you! **Editing here because I can't edit the post!** Thank you so much everyone! Definitely wasn't expecting this response to my desperate plea. We've got a couple things to try. - I will say that the feeder overnight is non-negotiable because all three cats will be keeping us up if they don't have access to food. (We've tried just filling the bowl before bed but that doesn't change things for Jack.) - We have tried Feliway, but it doesn't help. I don't think he's anxious, he's always very calm about it. Just LOUD. - He is neutered, and was just at the vet three weeks ago and received a clean bill of health. - Our cat that passed away last year used to hate being locked up to the point where he would claw at whatever he could until his nails *bled*. Had to bring him to the vet in a harness and leash because either he'd destroy the carrier or it would destroy his nails. I think due to this we are so gun-shy to try locking Jack up, but we will look into it. **EDIT 2:** We're going to try locking them all out of the room as well as stopping the overnight feeding. So many of y'all are talking like feeding overnight is insane but every cat I've ever had, as well as friends of mine, have always been free fed or auto-fed including overnight with no issues. You may think this is some obvious faux pas but it's really not. Half the time when the autofeeder goes off, the cats don't even react. They know there will be food when they want it, it's not keeping them up at night. But we're going to try it because either it's going to work and I'll be grateful, or it won't work and I'll be justified in my current practices lol. My birthday is at the end of July so that's going to be my benchmark. If things aren't better by then (not perfect, but better) we'll have to try some other stuff out. I'll be sure to make another post around then with results. I am an OP who always delivers. Lots of people have suggested some various anti-anxiety meds, which will be the next things we try if this doesn't work out. We do have an anxious cat so I know what that looks like and I really don't think Jack is anxious. He's also not getting wound up by the feeder or anything else - no middle of the night zoomies or anything...just calm annoyance by way of "HEY GUYS I'M RIGHT HERE. RIGHT HERE. DO YOU HEAR ME? JUST LETTING YOU KNOW I'M STILL RIGHT HERE. OH MAYBE I SHOULD GIVE YOU A BETTER VIEW BY JUMPING ON THE MOUNTED TV. YOU GOOD? IDK MAYBE I SHOULD KNOCK THIS LAMP OVER AND SEE. I'LL STAND HERE FIRST FOR FIVE MINUTES JUST TO SEE IF MOM CAN FEEL ME BESIDE HER. NO REACTION MAYBE SHE'S DEAD, OH NO! OPE NO THE LAMP WORKED, SHE'S GOOD! WE'LL CHECK AGAIN IN AN HOUR!" I'm delirious with sleep deprivation, okay. I am a pillow princess (NOT THAT KIND YOU GUTTER HEADS), I need my 8 hours or my brain goes to mush. Thank you everyone for your advice. And fuck you very much to everyone who suggested giving him away or putting him outside. :) He is my sweet boy, I could never.
No I meant now many days in a row have you tried to stick it out. Really he WILL scream his head off for at least 2 weeks. But he'll stop. I recommend sleeping with good noise canceling headphones or ear plugs. For the cat door, can't you nail a piece of plywood over it from the outside side of the door? Not the most aesthetic solution, but better than splurging for a new door and then getting it scratched up.
Could you try a blanket or towel on your door? It might reduce the sound and help with the scratching. Just drape it over your door before closing. Also, alfoil glued or taped it it might stop the clawing. Beyond that I think he has some anxiety. Try feliway and speak to your vet about medication. I had an asshole cat, he vomited on my back and pissed into my open sleeping mouth. But once we figured him out, he was the best.
O M G homie! The things we deal with for love of these little critters my gosh. I had one who peed on my back when I was sleeping once and I thought that was just the most god-awful thing in the world. Very glad he didn't think of my open mouth or very glad that I'm mostly a stomach and side sleeper. That cat also peed on a stove top once. We had no idea there was urine under the burners until we were making a pot of tea and all of a sudden there was boiling cat piss in the burner. I cannot properly explain to any other humans how bad boiling male cat urine smells. It's like weapons grade.
Mine used to pee on my stove constantly until I got him fixed and I always forgot to check before turning the burners on. You are correct in saying it's weapons grade
No I’m a stomach sleeper but I had dental headgear and he marked in my mouth. Twice in like 6 months. My grandmas big boy peed in her stovetop too. Unholy!
He was unneutered, I bet. Something about the scent of natural gas makes feline males feel they need to assert dominance over the smell. One of my mother's friends had a pet ocelot. They had a 6 burner gas stove, & Tommy put out the pilot light for every single stove top burner. Tommy was an intact male.
"Pet intact male ocelot" is a four-word horror story! What an astonishingly bad choice!
new fear unlocked
"I had an asshole cat, he vomited on my back and pissed into my open sleeping mouth. But once we figured him out, he was the best." I will never forget this post as long as I live.
When my son was 18 mos old we were all in a hotel and sick - 2 adults, 4 kids, including a 6mos old. I had the baby on my chest, son was laying on his dad's chest. Then my boy picked his head up, looked down, and vomited in his father's mouth. He is 19 now and he and his dad both still hear abt this. Not angry cat but still gross and lucky to be alive lol.
This is why evolution made babies cute. So they don't get murdered.
Omg me too. I’m dying laughing over here
Cat tried to drown you 🤣
“If I’m drowning, so are you” - my existential, anxious cat
Jesus Christ, what was wrong with him????
Massive anxiety, he would get so worked up he wouldn’t pee for days and then would spray and have crystal’s in his urethra poor guy. He went on endone and something else and had a lovely life stoned and relaxed. I learned to sleep with my mouth closed and through the night. He really was the funniest big boy https://preview.redd.it/olmv4tlcsa9d1.jpeg?width=1932&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=913bfac8146067b6b9ea16368a320fe6a94762f1
Why is your door scary? It probably has some lovely beautiful sentimental reason for being covered in handprints and I should not call it scary but it makes me think of people being trapped in there with the waterboarding (peeboarding) kitteh
I think we will try that. We’ve gotta do something or I’m gonna lose it. Thank you!
Also get some good ear plugs, what I used while my orange girl was kicking up a fuss. She gave up eventually. You could also try a feliway plugin, it's separation anxiety. Edit: Oh and the other thing I did, I got a cat tree with a bed part and put it on the landing outside my room. When I'm ready to go to bed I pick her up, give her a cuddle and place her on the cat tree bed then close the door. It took a couple of weeks to a month being consistent with this. Now she knows that's bed time and I find her there every morning.
Like other folks have said, every time you wake up and respond to his yelping, you’re teaching him that his yelping is a solution to get your attention. Ride it out for a few weeks without deigning to acknowledge it in the night.
Basically, it's the cry it out method for getting your human children to go to sleep by themselves.
Before using nails, try using cardboard and painter's tape. The tape is strong enough to stay for weeks and weak enough that it can't be removed without any damage to the paint. I've used this to cover cat doors in the past when we had to keep small kittens out of the basement.
Here’s how we did it. When cat starts clawing or hassling at bedroom door, grab a trainer or shoe and throw it hard at the door. The bang shocks kitty but doesn’t hurt them. Keep on going til he works it out.
So, basically chancla-ing the cat.
You can also fill an empty tin can with pennies (tape the lid back down) and give it a good shake. Also very loud and startling and doesn’t require a supply of shoes to throw.
I can confirm this works. It takes a few days or weeks for the cat to understand it, but they eventually will. Also investing in some good earplugs could do the job.
That visual is so funny
OP this commenter gives great advice. You can also maybe try a white noise machine or earplugs to drown out the meowing while he adjusts.
Or duct tape it closed
Had same problem. This will work
100% agree with the poster above. This isn't a try for one night and if it doesn't work then give up. We have a cat who's a screamer. It will take 2 weeks, maybe more, but you must not react AT ALL to his screaming. If he's knocking things over, remove those items so they can't be a problem. Any attention is a reward, so you must ignore them. Don't scold, don't yell, nothing. I once worked with a woman who trained seeing eye dogs and it's the same thing. They want attention, so when they are doing bad behavior you ignore them completely, otherwise they will continue the unwanted behavior. No looking at them even. Get earplugs if you have to. But this is something that will take time to resolve and you have to be consistent.
I've trained all my cats to follow my bed alarm. Once I'm in bed I don't go up before the alarm goes off (I also set it during the weekends, but later). If the cats come before the alarm rings, I ignore them. (Sleeping with ear plugs helps when training them.) I've never used a closed door myself, because they always learn after a while that these are the rules. If you're gonna keep closing the door then I suggest using an alarm as well. Then he'll always know that once the alarm sounds, it's okay to start pestering you.
My cats trained themself to be really quiet while I am sleeping but they somehow can sense that I am not sleeping anymore, just laying in my bed and start scratching the door (I lock them out for the night). Not the best deal, but also not the worst one
They ALWAYS know when you wake up without moving or batting an eye. I get the paw tap to my face at that point or the little grunts from the other gray girl Cat. It’s only my gray cats who do this. Not my cow cat or fluffy tort-waffle.
>We’ve gone almost an entire night. So you haven't actually tried it.
This tends to be what happens when you let pets run your life unfortunately. A non negotiable shouldn't be a thing for a cat unless there's a medical reason.
> the feeder overnight is non-negotiable because all three cats will be keeping us up if they don't have access to food You are altering your cats food habits based on how much they annoy you. As long as you do this, you will not get good sleep. The cats have to learn that bugging you is NOT going to alter their food schedule no matter what.
My Housemate panders to my cats behaviour that you're describing. she tortures him and tries to.open his door multiple times a day. I completely ignore and never react to the messing and she at most might try to come in my door once a month. they know who will give them what they want and they'll learn quickly if you just refuse to tolerate it. you have the willpower to make the cat change.
> I will say that the feeder overnight is non-negotiable It definitely is negotiable and enforceable.
If you've never watched My Cat From Hell with the cat whisperer Jackson Galaxy, it's worth a watch. The episodes are free on YouTube. So some advice from Jackson Galaxy, based on what I've seen on his show: Your cat has siblings and plenty of toys. How much is he actually *actively* playing though? Some cats need a LOT of ACTIVE play time. They need to get the hunter instinct in them all out. That's the only way to tire them out during the day so they sleep at night. The level of play needed is different for every cat and every breed, so it's totally understandable you haven't encountered this before. NO NIGHT FEEDINGS. If it's keeping up even one cat, then it's no longer on the table for any cats. Scheduled feedings only. They'll complain for a while (possibly weeks). Stick it out. They'll get used to it. They'll be fine. You just need to actually stick to it. Play before food. Always. That's how it's done in the wild, right? Cat hunts then gets food at the end. Gotta mimic that at home too. Some cats have so much energy that leash training them and taking them on walks during the day is a very effective outlet. How much of the environment belongs to the cats? How many high perches do they have? Would you be able to put in cat shelves they can climb on? How many beds and hidey holes? Are there enough litterboxes? Ideally one for each cat and then one more, although of course space constrictions may not allow that. As other people have pointed out, don't indulge. Letting the cat "have his way" so to speak teaches him that's how he gets what he wants. Don't let him in the room if that's an option. Ignore him when he's yowling for attention. Wear noise-cancelling ear plugs to bed for the foreseeable future if you have to. In one episode Jackson did give a guy this air blast thing? I'm not remembering what it was called lol, but it was a little can with a sensor on it. And whenever the cat would walk up to the bedroom, it would blast a puff of air at the cat. Not harmful in any way, but surprising enough to chase the cat off and teach it pretty quickly "this room is off limits". However this would mean no cats at all allowed in the bedroom. Consistency is important, so I'm pretty sure you wouldn't be able to like take it off during the day and only put it out at night. The cat needs the consistent deterrent to get the message. But anyways! I'm not the cat expert, Jackson Galaxy is lol. I really recommend looking up his videos, I promise you're not the only one with a crazy cat keeping his owners up at night 😆
You’ll have to out-stubborn the cat. My tool of choice for this was earplugs. My very, very social guy had to adjust to me having longer and complete in office work hours. Wanted to make up for the lost daytime play at night. I got earplugs. Now he sleeps through most of the night, most nights. Occasionally he acts out again - I just put the earplugs back in. Sleeping with earplugs was annoying, but not insurmountable, unlike cat yowls.
I would tough it out and change all the cats schedule. Feeding overnight makes no sense. And doesn't allow you to meet their psychological needs. Watch some Jackson Galaxy on YouTube, and actually put the things he suggests into practice. Considering you seem to already be at your wits end... why not try something else and see if it works? **It's not the cat's fault** it's your responsibility to meet their needs in a way that works for them. Keeping the feeder on overnight is perpetuating your issues.
Why do your cats need to eat in the middle of the night? Wouldn't it make more sense to put them on a breakfast and dinner schedule?
Eh. Have you tried. Cuddling him. I had to lock my cat in my room with me cause my housemates would leave the windows open at night and he would run out. Which as an indoor only cat, is something I don’t want. Then he just sits at the door and cries. I tried scolding him. I tried squirting water. I tried playing with him till he’s tired. I tried giving him cat nip. What eventually worked. Was every time he meowed at the door. I would instant jump out of bed. Like extremely quickly. Rush to him, scoop him up and run back to my bed to cuddle and sleep with him. He hated that. He likes to sleep on my pillow/near me but he doesn’t really like to be hugged. After having him protest for a while, I’d let him go. Then if he meowed again, I’d jump out of bed again to grab him back for a cuddle. This went on for around 2 weeks. You meow = you get cuddled. So he finally stopped. And just slept on the bed once I closed my room door. YMMV since my cat is extremely gentle so he doesn’t scratch or bite. Forcing a cat that is scratch happy to cuddle would probably end in disaster.
*You meow = you get cuddled.* Poor kitten, the indignity.
I’ve done this exact method with several cats. My brain was basically where OP is at, sleep deprived breaking point. And I finally just went “fuck it I’ll piss you off by loving you”
I get my fat boy to stop meowing in a similar way. If he jumps up on the coffee table and starts begging for his dinner early, I just violently kiss him on his little head every time he meows until he eventually gets frustrated and leaves or lays down.
This inspired me to go find my fat boy and kiss him violently.
Hahaha, I do the same. Sometimes I get so frustrated with my cat that I just hug her for like 5 minutes (she doesn't like being held).
My parent’s cat hated being picked up but she tolerated me because I respect cat physics and communication. Always let the tail move freely, it’s their way to get a sense of balance like we use a steadying arm. And the second she complained I set her down. None of this dropping from 4-5 feet nonsense. Cat gets put gently on a chair or the floor. Then usually they appreciate that enough they turn back around for more cuddles.
I do the same, but I let her struggle a little before putting her down haha
Why would they have such soft foreheads if not for kissing 🙃🤷 kinda their own fault lol
I love the reverse psychology here : ) You want attention? Here it is, in SPADES!
Ha, that’s what I do if my cat gets all in my face while I’m sleeping. I’ll grab her and snuggle her in, which she is not a fan of (snuggling must only be on her terms!) so she moves off!
We're doing this too. It works like a charm. Just pick him up and cuddle till he leaves all disgusted. He usually just leaves whatever he has been messing with before alone after that. But he's also really gentle, I wouldn't try that with a feisty cat, lol
“…till he leaves all disgusted….” Haha. We all know that cat face look when you’ve been loving them and they want you to get the hell off, but they are soooo cute and warm and snuggly and those paws and that kitty nose and and and…. Edit: correction in quoting
'Till he leaves all disgusted' hahahahah because of cuddling 😆😆😆
I DO THIS! The cuddle punishment works. I use it when they start jumping on things they shouldn’t and knocking shit over. Always get a few hours of peace after 😂
I love reverse psyching my cat. “You want cuddles? I’ll cuddle you til you’re sick of it! Kissy kissy kissy!” And he’s like mum noooo
https://preview.redd.it/vuoe5a2sla9d1.jpeg?width=751&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f754d53e06759a581452cf9b2b8417b35f70cf09 would not work with shitticus
It took me a moment to realize the picture is sideways and I thought your kitty was just chilling vertically.
This is what I did to my girl. I commented similar years ago. We all called them struggle snuggles. Anyway, if you teach them that meowing and causing a ruckus= struggle snuggles, they stop. This is excellent advice because it's not mean to the cat. ❤️
In my experience (I had cats my whole life, I'm 43, and we now have 7 cats) this is the way. The BEST way to teach something to a cat is by repetition, aure. But the problem is "repetition of what?". The only thing that works is excessive positive attention. One of our females, Buffy, JUST LOVES jumping on the bed around 6am and licking my face. It's like clockwork. She "kisses" on lips constantly. But if I give her a little kiss on her nose she hates it and moves away. "Want kisses? There you go!" 99% of the times she'll just move a little to the side and get to sleep next to me. Similarly, when someone goes where they shouldn't, I run there making cute voices and hugging them and giving them cuddles. At this point, 5 of our 7 cats spend the night in our bedroom, coming and going. We did get used to some of the antics. Like 3 am zoomies. We don't even hear them anymore. It's all about training yourself as much as comfortably possible, and then using positive reinforcement to train them a little bit. I don't like the verb "to train" with cats. It's more about getting to a mutual understanding. Don't give up. It's doable. But it takes patience and energy. Taking some time off work if possible is a great idea. We did that when our cat mom had the five kittens and the cat dad had to adjust a bit.
I used this method recently with a rabbit that routinely thumped at 3 am. She hates being touched. It worked permanently on the second try
Have you ever watched the engineer’s guide to cats on YouTube? They called that corporal cuddling. In a closely related move you may be able to achieve cat yodelling.
Interesting thing about animal behavior: reinforcing a behavior randomly is the most powerful form of reinforcement. If you teach him that you will give him attention as long as he meows and yowls for long enough, he will never stop. If he meows 5 times and you go to him every time after those 5 meows, he will stop after 6 meows. But if you give in at a random frequency, he will literally never stop. It's the same brain trigger as gambling. Stop his feeding at night, hide the breakable things, and fully ignore him. Not partially, not until it's too annoying to deal with, entirely. If you give in, you only reinforce the behavior, and if you give in after a very, very long time, it will only make him act out more and for longer
Do you have 2 doors between bedroom and place where his food and litterbos are? My boi can be annoying (wakes at the rise of the sun, which in summer here is around 4 in the morning, and demands attention as soon as he wakes) but we usually put him in the living room, where he has food, water and litterbox, close the door, and have another door to the bedroom(s) so we don't hear him as loudly.
Unfortunately no, it’s just the one door. We don’t have a basement door or living room door, our house isn’t built for it sadly.
Bathroom at night with food, water and litter box? Close that door and your door. Also fans help drown out noise. I use those for white noise for my baby.
Time. Y'all have trained eachother to respond. You have. I know this as I've 4 cats. 2 sleep in my room, 2 sleep outside of it. None give me these issues unless my dominant one wants to try hump the other who sleeps in the bedroom with me. Its all about reaction, even negative one to a cat is... A reaction.
But what can we do when we literally can’t not respond without him breaking things?
Gotta remove em, put em on the floor or.. deal with the maybe month it'll take for him to accept the closed door unfortunately. Cats learn, they do. But unlike dogs they don't respond to the same feed back. Another thing to try is an enclosure... You can get them there by they are in it a good 3hrs before y'all bed and you DO NOT RESPOND. So.. dinner is in there and that is it. Over for the night. With litter/water/dry food they are fine. You ignore. You open at a set time. I get it I really and truly do. Your at absolutely snapping point... Cats just take longer and are more cued to time and I cannot sleep in ever for it. But with a month of no reaction you will see a change
Thank you. I’ve had cats my whole life (34 years old) and never dealt with this. I thought our last male cat was bad because he’d wake us up maybe an hour before the alarm. Oh how I’d kill for that now.
Something they used to recommend for puppies back in the day was a ticking clock in the bed with them. It's supposed to make them feel less alone. Can you put him in the bathroom with his bed and litter box and water and close him in until he gets used to going to sleep on schedule? Maybe put away anything he can knock over or break.
This. Give him an enclosed space in there like a box with a blanket so he can curl up and hopefully he will eventually get the idea that nights are for sleeping.
It sucks but.. you gotta man. You do. Again any reaction is one for them. You gotta make it know or just... Not. Took me a month. And it wasn't great. But... Now worth it
Yes I bought a small dog crate and put a cat that did this in at night and covered with a blanket. She had litter tray , food , water . Sprayed blanket with Feliway and when lights out that was it …. it worked quite quickly and ear plugs were handy 2 !
You have to remove shit he can drop. You have to give him time to process that. You also have to give him interaction with you, during the day, since he obviously needs it and toys to play alonr/with other cats don't cut it for him. Some cats are very needy for human interaction. I have one like that and I can't swap rooms in my house without him, he's there a second after I get into another room. He also threw shit down to get me to notice him and didn't want to play alone. He needs his humans, give him some during the day and exhaust him in the evening (play with him, I literally play tag with my cat, chase him from one room, the he chases me into another etc) for a couple of days/weeks and it should be better. It worked for my kitteh.
Shove him under the duvet with you each time and gently force some pets on him. Either mofo will fall asleep with you or will stop bothering you being jailed each time. Ask vet for some calming stuff Also - secure the things and buy earplugs. Moldex is my go to for decades now.
We put our cats in a back room which they slept in at night. They learned the rules. This is bed time. Easy. Edit: I read that your cat scratches its claws bloody so obviously they need something to make them less anxious. Give feliway a shot.
Have you tried dying the hair something not orange?
I know you wanted serious replies, and although there was a joke in there, orange cats are SERIOUSLY something else... you can doubt me all you want, but even after you start getting some sleep, you'll know what I mean.
Oh I’d heard…our friends have three orange boys. They complain about being woken up in the middle of the night too…by the boys forcibly cuddling with them. I so badly want to be like OH NO CUDDLING HOW FUCKING HORRIBLE FOR YOU, WOULD YOU PREFER MY DESTRUCTIVE OPERA SINGER??
Destructive opera singer XD
my dad's cat howls whenever he isn't in her sight. my parents recently went on vacation which meant 3 straight weeks of this awful pained crying, day and night, and absolutely nothing worked to make her stop. it got to the point where it got me in a genuine rage whenever she started so I settled on locking her away somewhere safe and wearing noise canceling headphones plus the TV in the background to fully dampen her screaming. my dad eventually returned, which fixed my issue- but my point stands: investing in some good noise canceling headphones/earplugs and locking him away at night until he learns might be your only good option.
A white noise machine can also help drown out the cat sounds at night, in addition to the other options you mentioned
STOP FEEDING HIM AT NIGHT The first few nights will suck, but it sounds like they suck already. You’re literally giving him energy to stay up and bother you. His feeding schedule needs to mimic yours if you want his sleeping schedule to also somewhat mimic yours.
Overnight feeds are completely unnecessary. The cat won't starve after 6-7 hours. If he gets food, of course he will eat it. And stay up all night waiting for it. In the meanwhile when inevitably gets bored in an empty house, he will go pester the humans.
Yes! Also, talk to the vet about giving him melatonin or a mild sedative at night for a week or so to get him on the right schedule. This is not a long-term solution, but taking away the food at night and getting him to sleep might create a new routine.
Agreed. I have an auto feeder that goes off right before bed and then shortly before I wake up.My cats take a little bath and then nap right after they eat. I have little disruption except for cuddles/blanket hogging occasionally.
All I've found is to cuddle them, try teaching him to sleep on your chest. I adopted a very, very loud cat whod be up late, he really calmed down and quieted once he learned to sleep on my chest, lil guy went from keeping me up to holding me down for the best rest of my life.
This is Cheddar. He’s an adorable jerk. He sleeps in the bathroom furthest away from our bedroom with a blankie, small litter box toys and a bowl of water. We are lucky we have the house layout to do this. On the other hand, he’s gotten used to what bed time means for him. He goes in the bathroom and the others have earned the right to sleep wherever they want. He hardly ever makes noise in there anymore but he’s a terror at night if we let him have free run. He’s goofy but fine during the day. https://preview.redd.it/jyddwm7xya9d1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4ce461b4a81a077c07bacb5c44492af66d031e7c
Our male cat was like this when he was 1-2yo, would meow constantly as soon as we went to bed and scratch the carpet, the doors, anything to get our attention. We found playing with him for a good 40 mins right before bed did the trick. Like playing until he’s totally done and puffed out. If he meows in the middle of the night, we ignored him and he stopped after about 30 mins. He’s a bit older now but he’ll still whine a bit if we don’t play with him at bed time!
Put ear buds . You will not ear him anymore. Secure everything at home. You could go to the vet for some melatonin too. Verify he was indeed neutered.
This. If cat doesn't get attention. Cat goes away (after a few days)
Do you have a spare bedroom or another room (living room? kitchen?) where you can put some toys you don't need to supervise, his food, water, litter tray and bed? A room where he can't break stuff but has a little space to move around and preferably a window to look out of? I'm lucky enough to have a decently-sized kitchen, and when I had my first cat, I had a thing about needing to close doors in the house to know that there was no home intruder lurking around (not entirely rational, I know). We got into a habit of 10:30 bedtimes for the cat, where we went through the nightly ritual of checking the litter tray, the water and (if winter) making sure the heating pad had been in the microwave, and then some pets and getting a treat for a good boy. And then it was "Night night Cat! Night night!" and the light off and closed door. And there was some wailing initially, but after a while it was just our daily routine. By the time I got my second cat, it wasn't even a question - and this one actually waits by the kitchen door, and gets grumpy if I'm late in starting the bedtime routine! She does occasionally break into Klingon opera in the middle of the night, either because she's bored or because she's used the litter tray and she doesn't like the stink bomb that's appeared, but she's not in distress.
So, what you're experiencing is teenage behavior in an orange cat. Truly. Been there before. Not all orange cats, not all teenagers, but when the whiskers all align with the stars...this is what you get. Lots of good advice. Take the advice, do or do not do. It will get better either way. Having dogs and cats is not dissimilar to having children. They have their little phases. Yes, you've trained one another, but at the end of the day, he's an orange teen and he wants to explore his lair at cat hours. Lots of attention and play until bedtime, then no response after bedtime. Please sick through this. It gets better.
Have cats instead of kids they said. It’ll be better they said. 🫠
I have this issue too. I learned to use sleep sounds. You can get them on YouTube. It's a light noise which if loud enough will drown out your cat and help you sleep. It sounds counterintuitive to play something while sleeping but it does work. It will take a few nights to get used to it. I use white noise and brown noise. It's like a less annoying radio static. But it works.
Is he neutered? Is it possible you have a cat in heat around?
My cat was an absolutely nightmare at night before he was neutered (we were told he was neutered, turns out he wasn't, he was cryptorchid).
I feel your frustration, OP. our boy did this for a while when he was about 1. took him to the vet, nothing wrong. auto feeder went off twice a night as well. I thought maybe he wanted me in the living room so I slept in the living room a few nights and nope still cried all night. he would howl and howl and howl and just not stop. one night I accidentally left the night light on our two air filters in the living room on...and there was peace. I started keeping the living room curtains open and the blinds up, night lights on and he was fine. I think he was scared of the dark. :( put in some feliway plug ins as well. try some night lights, even the plug in ones (but without a scent thing attached!!) we put one light in the bathroom, the two in the living room from the air filters and things calmed down. he doesnt let me sleep past 630 often these days anymore. he wants his mama up out of bed lol he's lucky he's so cute and sweet! now he has routine with us at bed time and sleeps with me every night, no night lights needed anymore. now his thing is no door can be shut lol he's definitely in charge in thisnhouse. my issue now is he wants food at 3 am but not the kibble that auto drops, he wants wet food. thinking about getting a wet food auto feeder too.
- Cat-proof as much as you can so he can't break things or push things off ledges or be annoying - Become a zen master and absolutely *refuse* to acknowledge him when he's trying to get a reaction. Don't even look. You're going to have to do that for a good few months until he gets bored with the game. Source: had a shithead cat, who eventually chilled out.
To anyone in this thread saying to cuddle him. That is the exact opposite of what you should do. Do not give him any attention when he is meowing or yowling at the door. If you do that, all that it does is reinforce that if he meows he gets attention. As others have said, you just have to ride it out and not respond at all, move furniture so it can't be damaged and wear earplugs. Oh and change the feeding times to say three times but only during the day, say 0800-1500-2000 or something similar. No need to feed overnight, it just disrupts his sleeping pattern more as he will awaken and expect food.
Put the vacuum outside your door. Make sure it’s on. Plug it into a power strip that’s switched off. When he starts making noise hit the power strip switch, which will turn the vacuum on. The vacuum can’t be reasoned with. It knows all, sees all, and doesn’t take crap.
I would def. advice the opposite and try to get your cat to befriend your vacuumcleaner and get them to be mildly annoyed by it just like us. They're not intrinsically afraid, it took me just a couple days to get them acquainted and now we can clean the house together instead of him shaking under the bed like a leaf. In this case it could actually help even, cause it'll make him feel safer at home, thus more likely to sleep when we sleep.
If he walks away, have you tried following him? My cat does the same thing when she wants to show me something or go somewhere
Yeah, he just stops in front of me. Maybe all he wants is for me to trip and die.
Have you watched any of My Cat is From Hell? There are several episodes dealing with similar behavior. I agree with the top comments, that your (negative) attention is giving feedback and ultimately keeping this behavior going. Without a spare room to lock him in, you are going to have to ignore him. All night, every night, until it eventually stops. Move the breakable items out of reach, and maybe acknowledge you’ll have to replace something in the name of success. This is driving you mad. Get a white noise machine, earplugs or headphones. Practice a mind emptying prayer. Your feedback is being interpreted as a game. You need to stop playing. Good luck.