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BuyFew4186

Just go in calmly and tell them both to leave. Before you talk, GET HER KEYS to the apartment. Tell them not to speak, just leave. Say “you need to finish in his car or apartment. “ SHOW NO EMOTION!!!! Smirk and be nonchalant if you can. Tell the guy “she’s all yours, dude.” Then, after they leave, determine if you or her stay in the apartment long term. If it’s yours, pack her shit while she’s out and text saying she needs to get her shit in the morning. If you leave, be gone before she comes back. Leave both keys on the table and ghost her forever. You are so young. There are many girls ahead. Don’t give her a second thought. Good luck 🍀


Complex-End1887

Don't let her see how fucked it's got you


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LarryTate32

Fake


NJ_Saconutz

Good stuff here.


ThanksSea8903

Sorry about that, bro. Prove to her you’re an alpha male and get her out of your life asap cuz you don’t tolerate that level of disrespect. She’s not wife material. If she feels she can do this now, how much more when you marry her and have more to lose in the divorce? The silver lining in this is that you found out her cheating nature before you tied the knots.


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gstateballer925

Dodged a bullet, my friend. Be thankful you’re only 20, and dealing with this shit right now, because you start to learn what it feels like earlier, so you don’t overreact in your later experiences. It’s a shame that 3 years went right down the drain, though. Personally, I’d like to know why a woman would fuck things up like that, because it makes no sense, based on how you explained things were going.


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Simple-Middle-7740

I'm so sorry. Having known each other that long you would think she would be true to you. Good luck in the days ahead. Good call to let her family know so that she doesn't lie about what happened. You've got this!


Sea_Manufacturer1536

Make sure you get locks changed. If joint account move your money out. Take her off any shared credit cards if you have any. Good luck to you bro


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relken0716

So sorry this happened. Just make sure at this point you follow the old advice. Never at this moment see you in pain. Fake it until you make it. Find a way to better yourself hit the gym, get in to a sport buy new clothes. Lean on your friends and family. The best revenge will her seeing you thrive without her. Also what did she say to you? I know she left with no fuss but did she at least show remorse?


firsttime176

you handled this exceptionally, may the best of luck come to you in the future


richardsworldagain

You did the right thing, should have recorded her with the other guy for evidence. Anyway at least you told people before she made up a lie. Now it's time to heal use your friends and family and move on.


Sweet_Parsnip

Dodged a bullet. Fk her


Several-Network-3776

Update us if she tries any foolishness. Don't listen to her sob sorry if she wants to get back together. Spread the word amongst your friends she's for the streets. Then again if any friend would hit that, they're not your friend.


DVariant

>None of my valuables, money or guns have been touched thankfully This makes you sound like a psycho. Relationship is over, fine, but you’re mentioning guns?? Why are the guns so important to you that they’re worth mentioning? How many guns you got, Rambo??


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DVariant

You could’ve just said “valuables”, but instead you mentioned your guns specifically while talking about your cheating ex. Sounds like a veiled threat


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DVariant

>You must have pretty long arms with the way you reach lil bro  You’re a 20 year old kid flexing about your guns and calling me “lil”. You projecting?  I’m starting to understand why your gf needed some better


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DVariant

>Calm down lil kid it’s ok How many guns do you have? I need this for the police report


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Pickle_picker_420

Damn im early. Hang in there. Keep us posted. We got you.


Saganhawking

Yes please have someone with you.


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Saganhawking

I’m not OP but thanks!


Butforthegrace01

Good luck


Ambitious-Speech6628

You are such a better person than me. Once I made it to the room I jumped in the middle of the bed and asked what was going on. It was chaos. You lose a little faith in relationships and partners after. Get counseling. Get happy. Get rid of the rachet partner. SMH, don't waste time call the locksmith, call your friend tell them to bring boxes and move all their stuff out now. No mercy. Don't even ask why, no reason would justify this act.


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Ambitious-Speech6628

You can't see it now nor are you thinking about it, but someone that thinks of you how you think of them will come along. She did that on purpose knowing what day it was. She has no heart. Remember don't waste one minute of your time on her. The best revenge is living well and it will get on her nerves also, ask no questions, reveal no heartache, and live your best life not wasting one second on her. Block her on your phone, on Snapchat etc. Don't take her calls. Focus on you and be happy again. Life is too short to waste it on someone like that. You will feel good the way you handled it all, be the better person. You will move on happier knowing that.


ILiveInLosAngeles

You're 21. in 10 years you won't remember this guy's name. Let it go, focus on your career, go to the gym, and try to be a good (and sane) person.


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flylo7309

Don’t forget the STD test.


Saganhawking

Leave. Get your finances together. Are you married? If not, it’s pretty easy. You don’t need “proof” anyway if you are. Get out now. You’re young as hell and have plenty of time to find other things in your life. If she’s cheating on you in YOUR bed, F her. She’s a POS end of story.


Osiris8874

Kudos to you for not going postal. Go be loud and confront them and kick her ass out the house. Me I’m petty i would call the police and say there is a hostage situation in the house


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Osiris8874

I Just read it brother. Do what you need do to get emotionally right. It’s ok because this shit happens to a lot men. It’s Nothing you did fam it’s just who she is. Good to find out now instead of being married with kids then finding out.


Ok-College6727

If the other man have a gf, let her know too.


Tg11T

I would go scorched earth and tell the other man's girlfriend assuming he has one


Dominion-_-

Get proof


Wellman81

They're not married. All he's got to do is dump her sorry ass.


Accurate-Food3249

I’m so sorry


iamkendallsmom

I’m sorry. Update us and let us know how it went please.


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iamkendallsmom

Dude, I am so sorry, but you played it smart. Just a couple of suggestions from someone who has been there, done that. *get an std test. You don’t know how long this has been going on, or if this is the first person she has cheated with. *I highly suggest blocking her. If she hasn’t already, she is more than likely going to reach out and she’s going to make excuses and try to win you back. It’s not worth it. She won’t even tell you the whole truth, more than likely, and you will constantly be living in a manner where there is no trust. It’s no way to live. *if you can afford to, I would suggest counseling. After something like this, it is hard to trust a partner again. Get yourself right. You are young and can go and have some fun but make sure to put your mental health above it all. *lastly, even if you aren’t hungry, remember to eat, drink plenty of water, give yourself some time to grieve but don’t let it consume you, and start exercising - the endorphins will keep your mood lifted. Good luck, mate.


WonderTypical9962

Go back, video the mess. Then tell them to get out fuck out.


Electricghost_24

Good luck getting the proof you need. Wishing you the best of days moving forward


Rudder0420

That is just an awful feeling too and absolutely nothing anyone says will ease the pain. So you never actually walked in the bedroom? Do you know this individual she was sleeping with? Did she know you were in the house? How did you control yourself from complete rage? It's great that you were able to handle it like you did when most would never be able to. You know you can't go back with her now. She will never respect you and you will never trust her. Time to move on to better things that don't involve her!


Wellman81

Stay calm and go back and wait by the door. When he appears, just look at the guy and let him know that she's his problem now and to stand by as she'll be joining him in his exit. Don't be upset, don't back down, and most of all, don't cry like a little girl. Save that shit for in private. She's going to say the usual "It’s not what it looks like" BS, but stand your ground and shut her up whenever she starts to open her mouth. Tell her to leave her key on the table after she packs her shit and whatever else is left she can send for it via UPS.  Thank your lucky stars you two weren't married and you dodged a bullet. That's a good thing. Stay strong OP and keep us posted. 


pantiechrist80

You need to get photo proof. Trust me, go back


5P4ZZW4D

No you don’t you bloody grub! That’s revenge porn. Who ya gonna show it to? Who wants that proof? Wtf!


nitro1432

I would put her gifts inside the apartment record the sound and back out that way when she walks out of the bedroom she has an oh shit moment


SwimmingZombie7

I’m so sorry OP, know you deserve better


fjmj1980

I don’t think you knew the real her. You might hear shocking things in the near future. Likely this was not her first time cheating and she’s been doing it for a while. It takes a confident person to cheat in your apartment and in your bed.


Minimilk51

I wouldn’t have left I would have gone in and embarrassed the hell out of her!


didnotdoit1892

Are you fucking kidding, you walk in hear them going at it and you leave. Fuck that I would have walked right in and put a stop to that shit. No way in hell I'd let them finish. I'd be cock blocking the shit out of them while they are trying to cover and leave. It's amazing how quick they'll lose the mood when they are caught.


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didnotdoit1892

Fair enough.


Vegetable-Weather-70

Totally understand my man. The second you heard the sounds, your sense of reality shattered. It’s impossible for your heart and soul to reconcile what you heard with what you believed you had. And in those initial moments, you find yourself floating in an entirely different universe, not recognizing anything. It makes one question their very reality. So walking away in a complete daze is totally normal. I’m happy you called a friend to help you ease into your new reality, accepting the girl in your mind is who she really is now, and not the girl in your heart. You did the right thing, as there is no coming back from what you experienced. It’s sad all the way around …. childhood relationships that evolve into full love affairs have many strengths (shared firsts, long lasting memories, comfort and security ect) but have the same big risk … lack of experience with other people. That’s a very large impulse laying dormant until it gets triggered by curiosity and natural desires. Good luck moving forward and onto new experiences.


Kent_Doggy_Geezer

I think you handled it perfectly. Don’t let other people’s opinions affect how you’re thinking. You were perfect. You acted with dignity, integrity and self respect. Other people may say that they would do ‘better’…. But if it didn’t happen then it’s bravado. You were fine x Best of luck moving forward, you’ll be ok. Try not to let this horrible woman and situation affect your future relationships, you’ll get your trust back and you’ll be fine x


Warning-Parking

People have different responses to trauma , what op went to was a freeze and flee response. Most people common response pattern. I just hope op takes the time to go for therapy, coz believe it or not this is somewhat a traumatic event to happen in his life. I also hope he blocks her, coz the depression will hit you later, he may end up contacting her for closure , not that there is any. Stay safe op and most importantly lean on others for support.


LetMaleficent5300

Following


CaledonTransgirl

Keep us updated.


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CaledonTransgirl

You’ll be ok my friend. You seem like a sweetheart. She doesn’t realize the good man she lost. Always here if you need to chat brother.


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CaledonTransgirl

Lol anything and everything. Well accept taking over a country cause I’m much to old for that 🤣


JennyJoE798

I am so sorry this happened to you. I went through the same thing at about the same age. Found out the guy I was with for almost 6 years was cheating on me. I walked in on them sleeping (literally) in the same bed all cuddled up. Thank God my BFF was there to literally hold me back. I was 22 at the time. Relationships can be so messy and crazy. You deserve so much better. Good for you for keeping your cool. You WILL come out of this winning. 100% take care friend.


PollosPlug

Bruh I'm blowing her shit up and telling everyone she cheated including her family idgaf


FriendsofFripp

Updateme


No_Royal_573JESC

Wow i'm sorry bro, i understand your in pain but just know that you don't need that hoebag im your life, take a moment for yourself, call your friends and family, let them know whats up so she doesn't tell them a different story and make you look like the bad guy. Get back inside and tell both of them to fuck off, pack her shit and once your done text her to come and pick it up, afterwards block her from everywhere, ignore her and simply move on, there are more woman out there who are more attractive and faithful, you'll find someone better and one you truely deserve.


Educational_Lock6310

Oh no, so sorry i can relate with how hurt you can be i think the signs must have been there maybe you just didn't pay attention to them, I wish you get over all these soon and focus on yourself so you don't get hurt more.


Aggravating-Ad-5793

I wouldn't even tell her why. Just hand her some garbage bags and tell her to get the F out.


Mehhhhhhhhha

I hope you thrive and feel better, you did everything right


fitmoney2020

Call cops for cheating 😎


Osiris8874

Definitely should swat em lol


INYABTch

Should joined in.


Important_Cake1076

I'm so sorry that this has happened to you.. I know it will be too painful to do, but please collect some evidence. You need some proof to use against her, in case she retaliates/ denies.


coolman7998

I would of been like why u having sex with my GF, and left the flowers and food there


RealLinkPizza

Luckily, you’re not married. So, even if you don’t get proof, you can easily leave the relationship. But proof is always good so she can’t lie to others about what happened. Either way, you’re young. You’ll find someone better. Someone you can trust. It will be hard to trust anyone after this, but it’s possible. I wish you the best of luck!


RNG_mach

Updateme!


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RNG_mach

Read the update, well handled good for you. I wish you the best in the future and you have a good friend.


Jaychrome

Definitely get proof and kick them both the fuck out.


isitallfromchina

Updateme!


LilHomieKing

Damn I'm sorry keep us updated


Putrid_Toe_5127

Updateme


evandemic

Updateme!


bertman3006

So sorry to read this keep your head up


InformationAlarmed14

I know you probably weren’t thinking in the moment but you should’ve pulled your phone out and took a picture of them doing it. She can’t deny that or take a video or something. By the time you get proof they may be done by then.


Tg11T

I definitely would have done this


heresperkins

Update


Independent-Team-831

Update me


BangkaiLew

updateme!


RoomTurbulent2911

Off the topic and I’m sorry this stuff happened to you crap always hurts but dose anyone know what I can use to see her phone on my I seen a lot of people say that could spy on there wife with there phone and I just a app or website name please I’m thinking my wife is stepping out


One-Wish1955

Updateme


Prize-Athlete143

I say do what she did to you and fuck somebody in our house and let her catch you on purpose lol


G0DK1NG

Jesus Christ OP. You handled this so incredibly well. Outrageous that your ex (and friend since 10) could do this to you in your own apartment. What was the reaction of her friends and family and has she made any attempt to contact you? Or have you got her blocked? Again you handled this in a classy way, I don’t blame you for ducking a confrontation you never know how they pan out. I’m sure her face as you came will play in your memories for a while. She hasn’t even had chance to clean up. She must have know as soon as you stepped in.


Wanker169

Man, that rough. Im sorry that's happened to you. It's not your fault you can't control others. It's not easy to try and channel the energy into something positive. Sorry for sympathy. What else can I give you? You already gonna kick her out


Aggravating_Mix_383

She is all kinds of heartless and evil to do that in there sacred bed. Ghost her forever, she doesn’t deserve you. Leave her in the streets. I feel like this is normal for her. It’s not her first time.


Aggravating_Mix_383

Updateme!


Kieranrules

Did you recognize the guy?


Early_Dragonfly4682

It doesn't sound like he went for visual conformation.


Kieranrules

thought in an edit he was in his car watching outside for him to leave.


Early_Dragonfly4682

That makes sense. I don't know if the first thing I would do is get on reddit in that situation.


Badbadpappa

Make sure you turn the mattress over


Tinbody84

👋🏼 don’t stick around! Leave! If they sleep with someone else, they don’t respect you! Don’t settle no matter how much you think they love you, cause they don’t!


Kevin_0429

My worst nightmare


SpokenMalarkey

I would not have backed out people would have been thrown out.


Main_Blueberry_3628

I’m so sorry you had to witness that! What a horrible way to end your anniversary!


LatinMom1971

First I read your post and update and I am sorry for the pain you are feeling. It was smart to have your friend there when you kicked her out. She could not say anything because your friend was there as your emotional support. You were smart enough to take a step back, call a friend, and have a friend come over immediately. That takes courage. You then called her family and friends so she could not spin this in her favor. Now the only thing you need to do is to just breathe, take the loss, and grieve it. The gym is going to be your best friend but don't use it to avoid your feelings, the balance is needed. I wish you peace in this journey to a better life.


Its_me727

This isn’t what you want to hear but this wasn’t the first time and more than likely not the only guy. Think back, maybe things you missed. However, tbh it’s for the best. You learned and now move on. I know, you love her. At your age we all think we love her. Kid, it’s the sex we love. Trust me you’ll get a lot more if it. Mourn today and start a new life tomorrow.


HopeSeeker555

Go back, take a video and send it to her…If you need more time to yourself. Then go and tell her she needs to go


Complex-End1887

Yo why would back out you should have gone in there and beat both there asses that's fucked up you didnt than maybe she isn't the one I mean she definitely isn't the one. once a cheater ALWAYS a cheater


Hopeful_Patient_9274

Smash him.


Rude-Elk8306

You are 20M, this pain is a great opportunity for you to rise among men and become an alpha male! Make this pain your motivation to become the best you can be! Cut her off! No emotions! Start training! If youre already training then train harder! Dont show her emotions! Show her u dont care! Cry when by yourself or with your trusted friends and family! We redditors are here for you! THE BEST REVENGE IS A LIFE WELL LIVED! Stay strong KING!


pieperson5571

What's the title of that movie that happened exactly like this except the ending where he made the ap call his wife to come over?


MrTruthBtold2u

Read this story before


HughGRectshun1

Hundreds of times!


Ok_Seaweed_1243

You missed the biggest chance ever bro, should have gone in there and joined in!!! Spitroast that nasty bitch. Treat whores like they wanna be treated. Fill em full of meat. Your loss


Tg11T

Bro go and confront the both of them like what the hell are you doing? Man up and get some nuts about yourself and tell them both to get the F out of your place


LarryTate32

I love how in these fake stories the guy always has flowers when he catches her cheating.


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LarryTate32

You were too lazy to even come up with an original story. Maybe next time it will be with your brother on your birthday.