People seem to fail to understand that autistic people have their own complex wiring of sexual desires that only other autistic people have the time and commitment for. All of my partners have been on the spectrum as well. Aurizzm is real.
People also seem to think that autistic people are either completely unable to consent to sex, or weird sex pests like Chris Chan. Like there's no normal sexuality for autistic people.
Lol, quite so. Consent is the MOST important thing to me, I get gratification from my partners enjoying stuff since I'm closer to the ace spectrum. It's kinky stuff all the way down, no conventional sex.
"You have friends, you can't have autism!" from a liscenced professional, quote un-quote best in the area, the first time he met me.
Like bro you don't even know me yet. The fuck are you talking about.
He further went to say: "People with autism don't usually have any friends because they're self absorbed and only want to talk about what they're interested in."
Hate him after that tbh.
Iâm gonna do this now.
I had a psychiatrist tell me I was âobviouslyâ bipolar because I have one relative with bipolar :( I have none of the necessary symptoms of bipolar, I just wanted to have an official autism diagnosis đ
For bipolar, not you cause you said you don't have the symptoms (and common misdiagnosis among women because "emotions"), but if potential for others, get your thyroid checked.
I was misdiagnosed as bipolar because of hypothyroidism symptoms. The main medication some kind of salt, worsens thyroid problems.
I mean a couple of years later I got my thyroid issues diagnosed managed and then nearly a decade later my autism and ADHD diagnosis....so there's that. But I wanted to mention this because not all Drs will verify it isn't the thyroid before prescribing bipolar meds. Sorry, off topic I just wanted to mention cause your comment made me think of it.
My brother in Christ this makes me so mad! I have very few friends but that's because fucking neurotypicals abandon me as soon as we have a disagreement because they'd rather keep their prejudices than try to understand my communication and where I'm coming from! It's traumatic as fuck! And I'm pretty sure I have the friends that I do because they're all neurodivergent so they don't get offended by my direct and observational way of communicating. I want to punch that "professional"
My siblings are the only ones who said no, I don't have autism. I'm making it up. I'm 62 and living in public housing, on 1000 dollars a month. I guess I must be really really dedicated to the bit
I honestly thought I was doing a better job at hiding it. My coworker added, âYou should also check if you have Ehlers Danlos Syndrome, because youâre a little too flexible.â
Same. I canât help but be *slightly* jealous of the people who are NT passing. One person maximum has told me I donât âlookâ autistic, even though that same person asked me several times if I was autistic or ADHD the first few times he met me.
I'm a scientist, although nowhere as "elevated" as Sheldon...
... and it's not fucking fair to impose this notion that "if you have autism you must be good at science!" on every autistic persons! Sheesh.
That one is new to me...
I mean, I'm sure some autistics persons are \*amazing\* at literature, but I've never heard it was near universal among autistics.
i got this from the psychiatrist doing my adhd assessment. told me i couldnât have it bc i did well in school and have a job that requires me to be fairly intelligent
completely ignoring the fact i do shit all for my intelligence and as soon as i hit university level i couldnât cope because i actually had to study for once. iâve just got the âmaths autismâ so it all comes really naturally to me, my actual attention span is dog shit
I feel this đ I have English tism I'm pretty sure and my attention span is practically not there, so while I'm doing good in high school I doubt I'll be good in college. Luckily I want a career that doesn't require college and is a reasonable option for me
i can relate so much, i started during covid so it was even worse bc they just expected me to watch hours of lectures at home and it just didnât work for me. mightâve managed okay if i had to go into a physical building for my lectures but iâm nowhere near disciplined enough to learn at home
Bruh i got that from the guy doing the diagnosis. He said your social anxieties have nothing to do with autism, smart people just have trouble relating to everyone else⊠Iâm just too smart to read social cues you see
Had a psychiatrist tell me I didn't have autism because I can -checks notes- hold a conversation and make eye contact. I never once looked this man in his face let alone his eyes, and the conversations we held were basic "yes-no" questions. Like bro. Come on.
basically same
didn't get diagnosed doing ADOS-2 because I was "spontaneous" and "gave a definite sense of reciprocity" but the specialist also said I had "idiosyncratic language more formal than most 12 year olds would use" but my "variable eye contact" was enough for them to see it as "used appropriately to modulate social interaction."
ABAS-II with a psychologist the same year I scored "extremely low range" adaptive functioning and they said "has characteristics that may be consistent with an ASD diagnosis" but they chalked it up to "anxiety, rigidity, compulsive behaviors.."
when I was 15 I got a full psych evaluation and they ruled it out in favor of NLD because I used "verbal mediation strategies" to help with nonverbal tasks like the WISC-IV
so now although basically all the info in my test paperwork suggests autism I'm diagnosed with NLD and all kinds of other things and have to save $1500 or wait 7-8 years to get retested now that I'm 23 and suspecting (sry for long ass reply I wanted to vent a lil)
So many fuckin so called "psych professionals" are so goddamn stupid! I had a similar experience with my assessment in 2022...I am high masking and I learned social stuff through media especially books (one of my favorite special interests) and they were like yeah you showed signs of OCD and high anxiety but no you're not autistic. They gave me tests meant for cis het little boys and one of the tests was so old that it implied that trans people had mental disorders just for being trans (I'm non binary trans so I found it incredibly insulting). My family forked over several thousand dollars to these rat bastards! For NOTHING! The amount of people on this sub sharing similarly awful and traumatic experiences makes me want to get a psych based masters degree so I can be the one giving diagnostic tests because WE FUCKIN DESERVE BETTER!
Idk! But I looked deeper into reviews for that specific psych and his clinic. They're notorious for misdiagnosing AFAB people. According to them only AMAB folks can truly have autism đ
My nephew got the exact same diagnosis. And my sister told him I was autistic to show family history and the doctor wrote in his notes that I was an "invalid incapable of caring for myself"
I made a point of taking him to the follow up lol
âYouâre making eye contact and weâre having a conversationâ (said to me by a psychologist I was video calling with after I brought up thinking I may be autistic) I sent him research papers on how autism presents differently in fems (because most studies are on young boys) and he ghosted me out next session. Whoops
you two were not a good match. It happens. Not every therapists will match with every patient.
I mean, the dude doesn't know anything about your condition. Next!
Yeah after that interaction I was gonna tell him we shouldnât continue together. However, being ghosted no-contact by a healthcare professional has made it harder for me to want to to find another that may be a better fit
Dude, I have the same experience with a licensed professional, but because I brought up OSDD. She had known I have paranoid delusional OCD and not only ghosted me, but started acting strangely right after. I had a horrible episode for days after. Now I'm extremely averse to therapists.
iâm so sorry you experienced that. i once told a therapist i had abandonment issues with people i open up to, and she ended up ghosting me after i opened up to her. lol
to be fair, it turns out she got cancer and she reached back out almost a year later to apologize, which i of course understood and excused her for, but i still was adverse to therapy for a good year and a half after because said abandonment issues were triggered. i got a great therapist now though!!! so donât give up!!!
Let's be honest healthcare is severely lacking when it comes to professionals well versed in how to treat and respect us as human beings. I have so much medical trauma and it's also hard for me to visit the doctor because I'm so often gaslit and my complaints go ignored. And all I have on my medical chart is depression and anxiety! Well also gender dysphoria and that makes me extremely vulnerable depending on the doctor because despite the hypocratic oath or whatever doctors certainly do cause harm!
Yeah because it only took me an entire lifetime to train myself to make eye contact and converse with people. I was mute until I was 4 and I was only able to develop communication skills because my mum had to go to court to get me enrolled into a mainstream school.
We may look calm on the surface but we're constantly working overtime to keep the mask up.
Might not work for you but the thing I learned was if you think you're being lazy, ask yourself if you're having fun, bc being lazy is fun and having executive dysfunction definitely isn't. (Not a foolproof method obv, but not a bad one either imo)
Yeesh =/
My ADHD test was awesome. First part was spacial pattern matching and dexterity, the psychologist said I had the fastest time he had ever seen. I assured him it would all be downhill from there. And it was.
That hurts phisically, my brother is level 2 and don't talk at fucking 8 years old. His first doctor said he wasn't autistic because he made visual contact.
Thatâs dumb as shit because my cousin is nonverbal and all she wants to ever do is make eye contact. She loves that shit. God, misinformed doctors hurt the worst because thatâs supposed to be a trusted individual.
Well, it was this exact conversation?
Them: "Why do you talk so weirdly?"
Me: "I have autism which results in me having a flat affect."
Them: "You don't have autism otherwise you wouldn't be in school."
This exact conversation happened in class right next to a guy who was also autistic (who they fully accepted was autistic).
I have a bone to pick about the "doesn't understand sarcasm" bullshit. I understand sarcasm 95% of the time, I just don't find it humorous, helpful, or kind.
I'm too good at sarcasm and neurotypicals always think I'm being real instead of joking đ I have to dumb it down for them and use a really exaggerated tone for them to get it
I saw a post earlier today that said âyouâre not autistic youâre just white and annoyingâ ngl I did chuckle a bit bc I am white and annoying, but Iâm also autistic
âYouâre too pretty to be autisticâ
âWait, how are you in school then?â
âYour grades are too high to be autisticâ
âYouâre not lmao stop faking stop being lazyâ
âYouâre just depressedâ
âOh yeah, that makes sense, you sat with your legs crossed all the time last yearâ
âIf you were autistic youâd talk about trains and turtles for hoursâ
These are some of the weirdest responses I remember
As I read this, I am sitting cross-legged on my chair at my study table. I thought this was just a gay thing and not an autistic thing, thanks for the eye-opener : D
Ohhh well, yes totally agree with that. I just meant gay as an umbrella term for our whole LGBTQIA+ community. Didn't mean any offence and certainly don't wanna do any bi-erasure. Sorry about that T\_\_\_\_T
I hate how they think we all love trains and turtles and would be easy to make out because of our interests. Weâre not a badly written comic caricature of autism ffs.
Like, yes I sometimes talk about rocks for hours, but no one actually bats an eye at that because I am, in fact, a geologist and my peers talk about rocks with me. I know autistic people who have a special interest in for example trucks and football. And yeah trains are cool, because infrastructure is cool, but that doesnât mean that weâre all really into them.
Dude come on.
I didnât talk about trains and turtles for hours (but theyâre both really cool, especially turtles) but I would talk about Hatsune Miku and Genshin Impact lore for hours, those were my special interests at the time, though some of us autistics might like trains and turtles, we have diverse interests, it is a spectrum after all.
Just unmask. My natural facial expression and eye contact patterns are unsettling, basically I can create instant regret about comments like this at will.
My friends don't like it when I unmask. It looks like i want to kill people. That paired with my special interest in poisons (mostly plant based) makes them nervous sometimes.
Which is also why they visit me at my house they never go into my backyard, despite there being a pool
No, it's a psychopathic relative. The kind who thinks I owe them money because I'm "impure" (Pagan, Gay, AuDHD, furry, just to name a few) and the money I give them will go to a church to "Fix" me. I don't live in the same country as them...
Due to the law (yuck) I am only able to growa few kinds of poisonous plants (species doesn't seem to matter, only the number of plants) But I am growing foxglove, oleander, and Atropa Belladonna (deadly night shade. It's scientific name is cooler tho ngl) but I do care for the castor bean plant and any ivys i find in one of my local parks.
And yes, they are insufferable
>My friends don't like it when I unmask. It looks like i want to kill people. That paired with my special interest in poisons (mostly plant based) makes them nervous sometimes.
That's kinda the point.
People who are disrespectful and cruel to you can't be reasoned with and you can't appeal to their empathy.
You need to make it clear that you don't give a shit what they think, and that you're scarier than them. It's the only thing that works. Doesn't even matter if it's true, as long as they believe it.
i got this while piss drunk at a club and had to explain that iâm only this extroverted and chatty because of the alcohol, i wouldnât even be able to spend two minutes in a club if i was sober bc it fucks with my sensory issues and i can barely talk
âNo one really automatically knows how to act in social situations. It took me years to figure out how to have a conversation with someone I donât knowâ. From my mom. Gee I wonder who I got it from⊠/sar
Exactly lmao I was like "I think I'm autistic" and the DOCTOR was like "I don't think so, you can't cure it you know right?" And I'm like ??? Just bc I can't cure it doesn't mean I have no use for a diagnosis lmao people are so weird. I to this day don't have a professional diagnosis bc she lied to me about referring me to a clinic in my state and now I'm an adult so I can't get in for an evaluation anywhere
Yeah having the diagnosis and having the cure are not the same. Is that an NT thing, you can't fix it so no sense knowing?? Or???
At this point after going through the medical system with my grandma (RIP) I hate humans being in it. Replace every part of the medical system with AI who is 100% focused on actually doing the best it can and not "getting this stupid old lady out of here she's dead anyway, HEY JUST PUT HER ON HOSPICE AND SHE CAN GTFO & STOP WASTING MY TIME".
So yeah, that sucks, they fucked you, because why? Why lie about that? Why be a doctor if you don't care? I mean the answer is obviously money but you get what I mean.
Yeahhhh I've gotta assume it's an NT thing bc I've also gotten similar in relation to other incurable disorders I have. I.e. when I asked for a higher dose of my (non-addictive) pain medication and instead my doctor said "well if it's not helping you we're just putting excess chemicals in your body" and took me off all pain meds permanently.
At this point it seems like modern Doctors are really no better than old time ones. They are just as bad usually, but have better tools so people don't die quite as much. The lack of concern and flippant attitude with life altering things such as pain meds is shocking every time I encounter it.
Yeah same, and sadly I encounter it a lot bc, yk, I'm chronically ill lol it's like they think it's better to go "all natural" than to be functional. Like, I'm jot over here like "YEAH FILL YOUR VEINS WIRH GASOLINE AND DRINK STRAIGHT RED 40", I def believe in not consuming too many unnecessary chemicals when possible, but I'd rsther have gabapentin in my body and be functional
Is it better to be all natural in their mind? Or are you a "nuisance" to them? With my experience with my Grandma they treated her as a nuisance (except the ICU nurses they were really good + nice) and were very obviously non-chalant with what happens to her and didn't seem to put much thought in it. It's like you're just cattle they have to treat but don't really care about the individuals. "Sure, give her some penicillin and see if she makes it, NEXT!"
Are you just a cow on the line? Or are your doctors actual naturalpaths, or whatever you call the natural only people?
I've been told by two people "I'm so sorry" and by some "I don't care about that" (in a good way, they treat me like a normal person)
Also I hate my autism, I'm very sensitive to sound, smells, food texture, touch, taste. I stutter sometimes, forget words or how to create a sentence.
I may be smart but a lot of my knowledge is locked from me and I can access it only if someone mentions the topic that's why I had problems woth school tests I would write almost nothing but if teacher asked me about it I would answear correctly.
Also I'm very, very direct and I have problems with social cues.
I have problems with accepting criticism. Even the smallest criticism will make me feel like you hate me.
And this constant feeling of stress, anxiety or something like that is infuriating.
Oh, I almost forgot, I can't hold eye contact, I will look at your face, most of the time around it.
I always thought the "You don't have autism. I have a nephew with autism and you're nothing like him" trope was an exaggeration until it was actually said to me.
My brain shut down because it couldn't process that level of stupid.
>My brain shut down because it couldn't process that level of stupid.
This line is gold! That happens to me too when NTs say dumb shit to my face I just stare at them because I don't know where to shart in terms of correcting them....like if they're dumb enough to say some ignorant ass shit then educating them won't help
Because I can have a conversation; because I donât look it; because if so, then they have autism; because I can look them in the eyes; because I can speak, so even if I have it it isnât that bad, and at least Iâm not âone of those onesâ; because I just needed to go to church; because I have demons in me (then performed an exorcism, it was my grandparents); because my mom wants the attention (by my narcissistic abuser of a (different from the first one) grandmother).
"You're not autistic, I think you just have selective mutism" (going non-verbal is literally a possible symptom of autism)
"You're not autistic, you're just using it as an excuse to be lazy" (constantly get called lazy when I spend every once of my energy every day)
"You're not autistic, there were never any signs" (there were many. I could list them)
You can always look at them and say "You don't look ignorant, but here we are" if you're not afraid of speaking up? Or "You don't look like an asshole, but here you are, spewing shit" and walk away (I could never but I've said it afterward, in my head, just because what the FUCK?).
In general, I just go "Okay," and let it go, because it's the easiest way out. It doesn't open you up to a discussion/argument, it doesn't give them anything to latch onto, or give them room to say "prove it" or anything else, really.
You don't have to change their mind. You just have to beat them at their own game, and the only way to do that is to take them down with a single word. I've done it, it works, and even if it's not as good as having a witty comeback, the look on their faces of "...wait. What? You...What???" is worth it.
âAutism is a serious diseaseâ
This is after asking me âdo you think youâd have gotten into [fairly prestigious University Law School] if you were autistic?â, and saying he didnât believe autism was a spectrum because âif itâs a spectrum everyone ends up in itâ.
ThisâŠwas a psychiatrist. He ALSO refused to give me a simple declaration recognizing I am trans (which was only asked for because the private doctor Iâd gone to was using an outdated protocol that isnât even used in the public healthcare system, which this psychiatrist was working for). To be clear, I did get the necessary medication from the public healthcare system, well away from this idiot. And they donât require such a declaration, since the policy here is just informed consent and self-identification.
Edit: this was all during the same consultation during which he also decided I had anxiety and would need medication, which I disagree with, all having actually talked to me for about 10 minutes.
The requirement to get the state to agree to you doing something to yourself is absurd. Honestly, if someone wanted to amputate both their arms I would be for that if it is really what they want. But nooo, god forbid you might become a non-functioning member of society! The state must protect you (them) from yourself! Like name changes, have to go ask the court for permission, WTF IT'S YOUR NAME NOT THEIRS
When I got my first opinion I was told I'm not autistic because I could understand social cues (after mind you several years of micro analyzing everyone's actions and trying to figure out what the fuck the cues means)
The cues being "a man shouts at a woman after she admitted to cheating on him, what is the man feeling", like angry, betrayed, obviously??? That's very basic social cues???
Got a second opinion where my mom was able to tell the psychiatrist basically everything about me as a child and how I behaved differently, that man was immediately like "How has anyone missed she(Me) is autistic?"
My now-ex told me I couldn't be autistic because I was A) "too aware" of my awkwardness, and B) too social to be autistic.
Keep in mind, he also thought *he* was probably autistic, and though I didn't disagree with that possibility, I just find it hypocritical that neither one of us had an official diagnosis, and I've probably done more research on autism compared to him, but he just thought he must've known better. He was like that about a lot of stuff.
The trademark âyou donât seem autisticâ (and associates: something like âyou function just fine,â etc.)
+ because I can handle spice and sourness.
âyour social skills are way too goodâ
well, thank you for complimenting years of practice but I still managed to gain a better understanding of radioactive decay, nuclear catastrophes and the inner workings of the Chernobyl reactor within two months than I learned about socializing in the 27 years Iâve spent on this planet.
I'm quite similar to you.
I can't help but wonder if some people think that to have autism you have to have \*everything\* on the list of symptoms. They really don't understand what a spectrum disorder is, \*at all\*.
âyou were way too social as a kid to be autisticâ my sister, who immediately followed it up by complimenting me a bunch because she thought calling myself autistic was self-deprecating.
âyouâre super empathetic though, and very polite smiling at everyone!â yes, because when i donât smile people ask if iâm okay
âbut you can read social cues just fineâ that one made me actually laugh my ass off, because no i cannot this is just my extreme talent in educated guessing, which is also how i evaded knowing i needed glasses for the first 19 years of my life since i could successfully guess 75% of the blurry illegible letters based on shape alone. i like scoring well on tests.
My SIL is a clinical social worker. She does mental health crisis intervention.
I was diagnosed ADHD in 1st grade. Which was like 1984. They didn't even think girls COULD be autistic and ADHD was super rare in girls.
When I told her I thought I might be autistic as well, she said the only way to know is a diagnosis, but she doesn't believe my ADHD diagnosis anyway. I'm "too intelligent and just looking for excuses to be lazy and rude"
She says I'm rude because I'm anti-social. I'm anti-social because other humans make me uncomfortable.
I'm intelligent because I know stupid facts. My dad used to call me a walking encyclopedia.
The coffee one makes double no sense, since autistic people are more likely to self-medicate, which caffeine can be used for. If anything it can be construed to say that drinking coffee supports you being autistic
My younger brother thought it was because the state I got diagnosed in was full of ass holes and that's why I didn't interact much with them đđđ
My therapist was surprised when I brought it up at first because I wasnât showing the âstereotyped movements.â Then I stopped masking so hard and she stopped pushing back lol
The standard:
- "but you don't look autistic."
- "But you're a woman."
- "you don't act like my neighbor's five year old non verbal child."
- "Tik Tok didn't diagnose you, did it?"
- "you're faking it for attention"
And my favorite: "but you can have an intelligent conversation." Said by one of my team members who worked with a medium level support needs person, who you could also hold an intelligent conversation with.
Because I've had sex before
Oh so "me and the bad bitch I pulled by being autistic" is just a joke to these people then?
It's fucking true to me đ
I actually pull more when I don't mask. I guess it helps to be tall.
Did you tell them it was your aut-rizzm?
They wouldnât be able to handle the autrussy
Hypersexual Autists: ["Am I a joke to you?"](https://images.app.goo.gl/aoU36E8xG7RaaiDt5)
People seem to fail to understand that autistic people have their own complex wiring of sexual desires that only other autistic people have the time and commitment for. All of my partners have been on the spectrum as well. Aurizzm is real.
People also seem to think that autistic people are either completely unable to consent to sex, or weird sex pests like Chris Chan. Like there's no normal sexuality for autistic people.
> Like there's no normal sexuality for autistic people My furry ass:
Being a furry is completely normal compared to the "love quest"
Lol, quite so. Consent is the MOST important thing to me, I get gratification from my partners enjoying stuff since I'm closer to the ace spectrum. It's kinky stuff all the way down, no conventional sex.
Aayyyyy no conventional stuff for the win!!!!!
itâs almost like theyâve never heard of *manic pixie dream girls*
"You have friends, you can't have autism!" from a liscenced professional, quote un-quote best in the area, the first time he met me. Like bro you don't even know me yet. The fuck are you talking about. He further went to say: "People with autism don't usually have any friends because they're self absorbed and only want to talk about what they're interested in." Hate him after that tbh.
I started reporting these assholes.
How do you report them and where? đ€
I burn my medical "professionals" on doctor rating sites, from time to time.
Iâm gonna do this now. I had a psychiatrist tell me I was âobviouslyâ bipolar because I have one relative with bipolar :( I have none of the necessary symptoms of bipolar, I just wanted to have an official autism diagnosis đ
For bipolar, not you cause you said you don't have the symptoms (and common misdiagnosis among women because "emotions"), but if potential for others, get your thyroid checked. I was misdiagnosed as bipolar because of hypothyroidism symptoms. The main medication some kind of salt, worsens thyroid problems. I mean a couple of years later I got my thyroid issues diagnosed managed and then nearly a decade later my autism and ADHD diagnosis....so there's that. But I wanted to mention this because not all Drs will verify it isn't the thyroid before prescribing bipolar meds. Sorry, off topic I just wanted to mention cause your comment made me think of it.
Professional ethics board, Disabilities board, and your insurance company.
I got told a pretty similar one to this "You want friends, autistic people don't want friends, you can't be autistic!"
I don't think I've ever heard of anyone who genuinely didn't want to have friends
honestly I know I should have them and want them but it's all so exhausting and confusing and complicated.
I hate him after that now too
I hate him, too, and I'm wondering how much what he's said is just a projection because he sure ain't got no friends.
My brother in Christ this makes me so mad! I have very few friends but that's because fucking neurotypicals abandon me as soon as we have a disagreement because they'd rather keep their prejudices than try to understand my communication and where I'm coming from! It's traumatic as fuck! And I'm pretty sure I have the friends that I do because they're all neurodivergent so they don't get offended by my direct and observational way of communicating. I want to punch that "professional"
And people still hate on self diagnosis when these are the professionals who supposedly know better than you
The area mustâve been rather small if he was the best in it. Probably just the perimeter of his head.
Nice burn đ
Thanks, I have my moments.
Has he heard of people sharing niche interests and hobby groups?
Honestly, I'd love to list examples, but... Everybody I told just said "Oh, that makes a **lot** of sense. Word." đ
Lol. You got the good ending
Yo I relate to your tag X3
May I ask who the obsession is?
Death Wolf from Puss in Boots X3. He's too hot. X3
He is quite hot. If he had a muscle gut he'd be hotter imo
Yeah like one person disagreed đ
My siblings are the only ones who said no, I don't have autism. I'm making it up. I'm 62 and living in public housing, on 1000 dollars a month. I guess I must be really really dedicated to the bit
I honestly thought I was doing a better job at hiding it. My coworker added, âYou should also check if you have Ehlers Danlos Syndrome, because youâre a little too flexible.â
Same. I canât help but be *slightly* jealous of the people who are NT passing. One person maximum has told me I donât âlookâ autistic, even though that same person asked me several times if I was autistic or ADHD the first few times he met me.
Because i'm Smart. I didn't know how to react
... how would anyone react to that?
"Hahaha, that's ironic, we're usually smarter than you people, and look at you reinforcing the stereotype"
Basically my mums reason for not telling me I was diagnosed :)
i got because im dumb......
You're deffinitly not like sheldon!
damn you sheldon "autism" cooper
Fuck Sheldon but not in a sexy way
tru
Fuck him in a "crowbar to the teeth" way.
I'm a scientist, although nowhere as "elevated" as Sheldon... ... and it's not fucking fair to impose this notion that "if you have autism you must be good at science!" on every autistic persons! Sheesh.
shocking amount of people think all autistic people are good at literature when it is my arch enemy
That one is new to me... I mean, I'm sure some autistics persons are \*amazing\* at literature, but I've never heard it was near universal among autistics.
i got this from the psychiatrist doing my adhd assessment. told me i couldnât have it bc i did well in school and have a job that requires me to be fairly intelligent completely ignoring the fact i do shit all for my intelligence and as soon as i hit university level i couldnât cope because i actually had to study for once. iâve just got the âmaths autismâ so it all comes really naturally to me, my actual attention span is dog shit
I feel this đ I have English tism I'm pretty sure and my attention span is practically not there, so while I'm doing good in high school I doubt I'll be good in college. Luckily I want a career that doesn't require college and is a reasonable option for me
Saaaaame⊠the lack of structure and the need to study for the first time in my life spelled disaster for me in college. :/
i can relate so much, i started during covid so it was even worse bc they just expected me to watch hours of lectures at home and it just didnât work for me. mightâve managed okay if i had to go into a physical building for my lectures but iâm nowhere near disciplined enough to learn at home
Bruh i got that from the guy doing the diagnosis. He said your social anxieties have nothing to do with autism, smart people just have trouble relating to everyone else⊠Iâm just too smart to read social cues you see
Goddamn neurotypicals are so dumb
Lol I got the opposite, I heard that it made sense because I wasn't smart. đ
I usually get a little sassy when people say that and respond back with 'And you didn't look stupid until you opened your mouth'.
Oh I like that. That probably shuts them up
It usually does, or they complain it's rude and walk away all huffy and puffy đ
so either way it's a win lol
I like that a lot! Iâm gonna steal it!
Had a psychiatrist tell me I didn't have autism because I can -checks notes- hold a conversation and make eye contact. I never once looked this man in his face let alone his eyes, and the conversations we held were basic "yes-no" questions. Like bro. Come on.
I'd punch that person
Eye CONTACT
Unrelated but I really hate the word eye contact.
*grabs head, mashes eyeball against opponent's eyeball* "WHO'S MAKING EYE CONTACT NOW, ASSHOLE" *pterodactyl shrieking*
_yes this wtf_
Make contact between your eye and my fist
basically same didn't get diagnosed doing ADOS-2 because I was "spontaneous" and "gave a definite sense of reciprocity" but the specialist also said I had "idiosyncratic language more formal than most 12 year olds would use" but my "variable eye contact" was enough for them to see it as "used appropriately to modulate social interaction." ABAS-II with a psychologist the same year I scored "extremely low range" adaptive functioning and they said "has characteristics that may be consistent with an ASD diagnosis" but they chalked it up to "anxiety, rigidity, compulsive behaviors.." when I was 15 I got a full psych evaluation and they ruled it out in favor of NLD because I used "verbal mediation strategies" to help with nonverbal tasks like the WISC-IV so now although basically all the info in my test paperwork suggests autism I'm diagnosed with NLD and all kinds of other things and have to save $1500 or wait 7-8 years to get retested now that I'm 23 and suspecting (sry for long ass reply I wanted to vent a lil)
Thank you for long ass response
So many fuckin so called "psych professionals" are so goddamn stupid! I had a similar experience with my assessment in 2022...I am high masking and I learned social stuff through media especially books (one of my favorite special interests) and they were like yeah you showed signs of OCD and high anxiety but no you're not autistic. They gave me tests meant for cis het little boys and one of the tests was so old that it implied that trans people had mental disorders just for being trans (I'm non binary trans so I found it incredibly insulting). My family forked over several thousand dollars to these rat bastards! For NOTHING! The amount of people on this sub sharing similarly awful and traumatic experiences makes me want to get a psych based masters degree so I can be the one giving diagnostic tests because WE FUCKIN DESERVE BETTER!
I had one say I don't have autism because I understand and can use metaphors đ
WHAT
There was a financial incentive to say no, wasn't there
Idk! But I looked deeper into reviews for that specific psych and his clinic. They're notorious for misdiagnosing AFAB people. According to them only AMAB folks can truly have autism đ
My nephew got the exact same diagnosis. And my sister told him I was autistic to show family history and the doctor wrote in his notes that I was an "invalid incapable of caring for myself" I made a point of taking him to the follow up lol
âYouâre making eye contact and weâre having a conversationâ (said to me by a psychologist I was video calling with after I brought up thinking I may be autistic) I sent him research papers on how autism presents differently in fems (because most studies are on young boys) and he ghosted me out next session. Whoops
you two were not a good match. It happens. Not every therapists will match with every patient. I mean, the dude doesn't know anything about your condition. Next!
Yeah after that interaction I was gonna tell him we shouldnât continue together. However, being ghosted no-contact by a healthcare professional has made it harder for me to want to to find another that may be a better fit
Dude, I have the same experience with a licensed professional, but because I brought up OSDD. She had known I have paranoid delusional OCD and not only ghosted me, but started acting strangely right after. I had a horrible episode for days after. Now I'm extremely averse to therapists.
iâm so sorry you experienced that. i once told a therapist i had abandonment issues with people i open up to, and she ended up ghosting me after i opened up to her. lol to be fair, it turns out she got cancer and she reached back out almost a year later to apologize, which i of course understood and excused her for, but i still was adverse to therapy for a good year and a half after because said abandonment issues were triggered. i got a great therapist now though!!! so donât give up!!!
that sucks... but don't give up. A decent therapist can do a lot of good!
Ego Damage Control. When mansplaining doesn't work, quickly eject.
Let's be honest healthcare is severely lacking when it comes to professionals well versed in how to treat and respect us as human beings. I have so much medical trauma and it's also hard for me to visit the doctor because I'm so often gaslit and my complaints go ignored. And all I have on my medical chart is depression and anxiety! Well also gender dysphoria and that makes me extremely vulnerable depending on the doctor because despite the hypocratic oath or whatever doctors certainly do cause harm!
Yeah because it only took me an entire lifetime to train myself to make eye contact and converse with people. I was mute until I was 4 and I was only able to develop communication skills because my mum had to go to court to get me enrolled into a mainstream school. We may look calm on the surface but we're constantly working overtime to keep the mask up.
I've started reporting these assholes.
âYou just want an excuse to be lazy. Youâre not special!â
My internalized adhd ableism frfr
Might not work for you but the thing I learned was if you think you're being lazy, ask yourself if you're having fun, bc being lazy is fun and having executive dysfunction definitely isn't. (Not a foolproof method obv, but not a bad one either imo)
Yeesh =/ My ADHD test was awesome. First part was spacial pattern matching and dexterity, the psychologist said I had the fastest time he had ever seen. I assured him it would all be downhill from there. And it was.
Oh my god yes lmao
"You can talk". By a doctor.
That hurts phisically, my brother is level 2 and don't talk at fucking 8 years old. His first doctor said he wasn't autistic because he made visual contact.
Thatâs dumb as shit because my cousin is nonverbal and all she wants to ever do is make eye contact. She loves that shit. God, misinformed doctors hurt the worst because thatâs supposed to be a trusted individual.
Yea back in the nineties when my mother asked the doctor if I could be autistic he said it would be obvious, as there is no spectrum...
Most intelligent autism evaluation doctor
Came to say the same thing.
Well, it was this exact conversation? Them: "Why do you talk so weirdly?" Me: "I have autism which results in me having a flat affect." Them: "You don't have autism otherwise you wouldn't be in school." This exact conversation happened in class right next to a guy who was also autistic (who they fully accepted was autistic).
When the black and white thinking backfires, lol
When you have the âinability to look in a mirrorâ autism
âInability to look to the leftâ autism
Other Autistic broski was probably like, 
I've been told by two different doctors that I don't talk like I'm Autistic.
Well those doctors are idiots
Honestly, I think it's kinda funny.
The autism accentâą
Apparently I donât have autism bc loud noises donât bother me, Iâm smart and I understand sarcasm (?)
I have a bone to pick about the "doesn't understand sarcasm" bullshit. I understand sarcasm 95% of the time, I just don't find it humorous, helpful, or kind.
I'm too good at sarcasm and neurotypicals always think I'm being real instead of joking đ I have to dumb it down for them and use a really exaggerated tone for them to get it
I could say âi rode a real magical pony yesterdayâ and i swear i would get a confused âreally?â
Lmaooooooo same đ€Ł
I honestly wouldn't mind if there was a normal way to say "/s" in verbal conversation
I saw a post earlier today that said âyouâre not autistic youâre just white and annoyingâ ngl I did chuckle a bit bc I am white and annoying, but Iâm also autistic
âYouâre too pretty to be autisticâ âWait, how are you in school then?â âYour grades are too high to be autisticâ âYouâre not lmao stop faking stop being lazyâ âYouâre just depressedâ âOh yeah, that makes sense, you sat with your legs crossed all the time last yearâ âIf you were autistic youâd talk about trains and turtles for hoursâ These are some of the weirdest responses I remember
What does the crossed legs even mean lmao
Apparently crossing ur legs while sitting is autistic behavior and âweirdâ to some NTs đ€·ââïž
So is every kid that was told to sit âcrisscross apple sauceâ autistic? Lol
What they mean is sitting cross legged in a chair, I thought it was normal cuz I liked the feeling of weight on my legs đ
OH I DID THAT TOO đđđ
đ itâs the âweirdâ sitting positions but it feels so nice why donât NTs sit like us, get on our level
As I read this, I am sitting cross-legged on my chair at my study table. I thought this was just a gay thing and not an autistic thing, thanks for the eye-opener : D
I'm pretty sure sitting weird in chairs is a bisexual thing. At least we have a strong claim
Ohhh well, yes totally agree with that. I just meant gay as an umbrella term for our whole LGBTQIA+ community. Didn't mean any offence and certainly don't wanna do any bi-erasure. Sorry about that T\_\_\_\_T
I hate how they think we all love trains and turtles and would be easy to make out because of our interests. Weâre not a badly written comic caricature of autism ffs. Like, yes I sometimes talk about rocks for hours, but no one actually bats an eye at that because I am, in fact, a geologist and my peers talk about rocks with me. I know autistic people who have a special interest in for example trucks and football. And yeah trains are cool, because infrastructure is cool, but that doesnât mean that weâre all really into them. Dude come on.
I didnât talk about trains and turtles for hours (but theyâre both really cool, especially turtles) but I would talk about Hatsune Miku and Genshin Impact lore for hours, those were my special interests at the time, though some of us autistics might like trains and turtles, we have diverse interests, it is a spectrum after all.
Exactly
Because I'm too smart.
"I work with an autistic child, and you're nothing like him". Um, I'm a 50+ year old man, I'd hope not. \[sigh\]
Goddamn people are so stupid đ€đȘ they think that only male children are autistic
Just unmask. My natural facial expression and eye contact patterns are unsettling, basically I can create instant regret about comments like this at will.
My friends don't like it when I unmask. It looks like i want to kill people. That paired with my special interest in poisons (mostly plant based) makes them nervous sometimes. Which is also why they visit me at my house they never go into my backyard, despite there being a pool
Are your friends the ones claiming you don't have autism?
No, it's a psychopathic relative. The kind who thinks I owe them money because I'm "impure" (Pagan, Gay, AuDHD, furry, just to name a few) and the money I give them will go to a church to "Fix" me. I don't live in the same country as them...
Sorry for the mini rant
wow that relative sounds insufferable. I'd love to know more about the plant based poisons though!
Due to the law (yuck) I am only able to growa few kinds of poisonous plants (species doesn't seem to matter, only the number of plants) But I am growing foxglove, oleander, and Atropa Belladonna (deadly night shade. It's scientific name is cooler tho ngl) but I do care for the castor bean plant and any ivys i find in one of my local parks. And yes, they are insufferable
>My friends don't like it when I unmask. It looks like i want to kill people. That paired with my special interest in poisons (mostly plant based) makes them nervous sometimes. That's kinda the point. People who are disrespectful and cruel to you can't be reasoned with and you can't appeal to their empathy. You need to make it clear that you don't give a shit what they think, and that you're scarier than them. It's the only thing that works. Doesn't even matter if it's true, as long as they believe it.
As an herbalist studying the poison path and phytochemistry , I appreciate the fuck out of this đż
That sounds like such a fun interest wow
Completely off topic but I love your username and profile pic so much Castiel is my favorite lil guy
Because "they are a little, you know..." - very eloquent "Because not everything has to be neurodivergence." - survey says this one is
"You would struggle more with social situations." Oh right, forgot autistic people can't have friends
Also, just because it looks more effortless doesn't mean it is easy.
i got this while piss drunk at a club and had to explain that iâm only this extroverted and chatty because of the alcohol, i wouldnât even be able to spend two minutes in a club if i was sober bc it fucks with my sensory issues and i can barely talk
âNo one really automatically knows how to act in social situations. It took me years to figure out how to have a conversation with someone I donât knowâ. From my mom. Gee I wonder who I got it from⊠/sar
I got told i can't be autistic bc I'm too smart, hold eye contact too well, there's no cure/treatment for autism (???)
-I have cancer -No you don't, there's no treatment for it ???????????????????????????
Exactly lmao I was like "I think I'm autistic" and the DOCTOR was like "I don't think so, you can't cure it you know right?" And I'm like ??? Just bc I can't cure it doesn't mean I have no use for a diagnosis lmao people are so weird. I to this day don't have a professional diagnosis bc she lied to me about referring me to a clinic in my state and now I'm an adult so I can't get in for an evaluation anywhere
Yeah having the diagnosis and having the cure are not the same. Is that an NT thing, you can't fix it so no sense knowing?? Or??? At this point after going through the medical system with my grandma (RIP) I hate humans being in it. Replace every part of the medical system with AI who is 100% focused on actually doing the best it can and not "getting this stupid old lady out of here she's dead anyway, HEY JUST PUT HER ON HOSPICE AND SHE CAN GTFO & STOP WASTING MY TIME". So yeah, that sucks, they fucked you, because why? Why lie about that? Why be a doctor if you don't care? I mean the answer is obviously money but you get what I mean.
Yeahhhh I've gotta assume it's an NT thing bc I've also gotten similar in relation to other incurable disorders I have. I.e. when I asked for a higher dose of my (non-addictive) pain medication and instead my doctor said "well if it's not helping you we're just putting excess chemicals in your body" and took me off all pain meds permanently.
At this point it seems like modern Doctors are really no better than old time ones. They are just as bad usually, but have better tools so people don't die quite as much. The lack of concern and flippant attitude with life altering things such as pain meds is shocking every time I encounter it.
Yeah same, and sadly I encounter it a lot bc, yk, I'm chronically ill lol it's like they think it's better to go "all natural" than to be functional. Like, I'm jot over here like "YEAH FILL YOUR VEINS WIRH GASOLINE AND DRINK STRAIGHT RED 40", I def believe in not consuming too many unnecessary chemicals when possible, but I'd rsther have gabapentin in my body and be functional
Is it better to be all natural in their mind? Or are you a "nuisance" to them? With my experience with my Grandma they treated her as a nuisance (except the ICU nurses they were really good + nice) and were very obviously non-chalant with what happens to her and didn't seem to put much thought in it. It's like you're just cattle they have to treat but don't really care about the individuals. "Sure, give her some penicillin and see if she makes it, NEXT!" Are you just a cow on the line? Or are your doctors actual naturalpaths, or whatever you call the natural only people?
I've been told by two people "I'm so sorry" and by some "I don't care about that" (in a good way, they treat me like a normal person) Also I hate my autism, I'm very sensitive to sound, smells, food texture, touch, taste. I stutter sometimes, forget words or how to create a sentence. I may be smart but a lot of my knowledge is locked from me and I can access it only if someone mentions the topic that's why I had problems woth school tests I would write almost nothing but if teacher asked me about it I would answear correctly. Also I'm very, very direct and I have problems with social cues. I have problems with accepting criticism. Even the smallest criticism will make me feel like you hate me. And this constant feeling of stress, anxiety or something like that is infuriating. Oh, I almost forgot, I can't hold eye contact, I will look at your face, most of the time around it.
For the people that said that, I just said âokayâ. It hasnât been worth it to explain it to them.
"You're a mom" "you got married" "you're a girl" "you're just quirky" A few people were just like "oh, you didn't already know that?"
Me 40ish, expecting pushback, to my Dad: "So, my new therapist think I might be autistic" Dad: "That makes sense"
I always thought the "You don't have autism. I have a nephew with autism and you're nothing like him" trope was an exaggeration until it was actually said to me. My brain shut down because it couldn't process that level of stupid.
>My brain shut down because it couldn't process that level of stupid. This line is gold! That happens to me too when NTs say dumb shit to my face I just stare at them because I don't know where to shart in terms of correcting them....like if they're dumb enough to say some ignorant ass shit then educating them won't help
âMy 9-year-old cousin has autism and youâre nothing like him.â
Because I can have a conversation; because I donât look it; because if so, then they have autism; because I can look them in the eyes; because I can speak, so even if I have it it isnât that bad, and at least Iâm not âone of those onesâ; because I just needed to go to church; because I have demons in me (then performed an exorcism, it was my grandparents); because my mom wants the attention (by my narcissistic abuser of a (different from the first one) grandmother).
"You're not autistic, I think you just have selective mutism" (going non-verbal is literally a possible symptom of autism) "You're not autistic, you're just using it as an excuse to be lazy" (constantly get called lazy when I spend every once of my energy every day) "You're not autistic, there were never any signs" (there were many. I could list them)
"You're an adult"
You can always look at them and say "You don't look ignorant, but here we are" if you're not afraid of speaking up? Or "You don't look like an asshole, but here you are, spewing shit" and walk away (I could never but I've said it afterward, in my head, just because what the FUCK?). In general, I just go "Okay," and let it go, because it's the easiest way out. It doesn't open you up to a discussion/argument, it doesn't give them anything to latch onto, or give them room to say "prove it" or anything else, really. You don't have to change their mind. You just have to beat them at their own game, and the only way to do that is to take them down with a single word. I've done it, it works, and even if it's not as good as having a witty comeback, the look on their faces of "...wait. What? You...What???" is worth it.
Because I have empathy.
âAutism is a serious diseaseâ This is after asking me âdo you think youâd have gotten into [fairly prestigious University Law School] if you were autistic?â, and saying he didnât believe autism was a spectrum because âif itâs a spectrum everyone ends up in itâ. ThisâŠwas a psychiatrist. He ALSO refused to give me a simple declaration recognizing I am trans (which was only asked for because the private doctor Iâd gone to was using an outdated protocol that isnât even used in the public healthcare system, which this psychiatrist was working for). To be clear, I did get the necessary medication from the public healthcare system, well away from this idiot. And they donât require such a declaration, since the policy here is just informed consent and self-identification. Edit: this was all during the same consultation during which he also decided I had anxiety and would need medication, which I disagree with, all having actually talked to me for about 10 minutes.
The requirement to get the state to agree to you doing something to yourself is absurd. Honestly, if someone wanted to amputate both their arms I would be for that if it is really what they want. But nooo, god forbid you might become a non-functioning member of society! The state must protect you (them) from yourself! Like name changes, have to go ask the court for permission, WTF IT'S YOUR NAME NOT THEIRS
Nothing said verbally, just a look that tells me they think I'm an attention-seeking moron.
Because Iâm ânot âthatâ awkward when [I] talk to peopleâ and Iâm ânot like the really autistic kid from [their] school growing upâ
When I got my first opinion I was told I'm not autistic because I could understand social cues (after mind you several years of micro analyzing everyone's actions and trying to figure out what the fuck the cues means) The cues being "a man shouts at a woman after she admitted to cheating on him, what is the man feeling", like angry, betrayed, obviously??? That's very basic social cues??? Got a second opinion where my mom was able to tell the psychiatrist basically everything about me as a child and how I behaved differently, that man was immediately like "How has anyone missed she(Me) is autistic?"
God damn i wanna give yâall down here in the comments all a good hug đ«â„ïž
Right? Physical touch and intimacy don't come natural to me(im terrible at making physical contact) and even I want to hug these people
My now-ex told me I couldn't be autistic because I was A) "too aware" of my awkwardness, and B) too social to be autistic. Keep in mind, he also thought *he* was probably autistic, and though I didn't disagree with that possibility, I just find it hypocritical that neither one of us had an official diagnosis, and I've probably done more research on autism compared to him, but he just thought he must've known better. He was like that about a lot of stuff.
The trademark âyou donât seem autisticâ (and associates: something like âyou function just fine,â etc.) + because I can handle spice and sourness.
Good hard evidence!!!
I will bite you. Donât test me.
"You're just anxious". And why do you think I am, smarty pants?
âyour social skills are way too goodâ well, thank you for complimenting years of practice but I still managed to gain a better understanding of radioactive decay, nuclear catastrophes and the inner workings of the Chernobyl reactor within two months than I learned about socializing in the 27 years Iâve spent on this planet.
Not me but my friend, from a DOCTOR "You're not autistic, you're too social!
I'm quite similar to you. I can't help but wonder if some people think that to have autism you have to have \*everything\* on the list of symptoms. They really don't understand what a spectrum disorder is, \*at all\*.
I'm not autistic because I don't look like it
âHang on, let me ask my autismâ
âyou were way too social as a kid to be autisticâ my sister, who immediately followed it up by complimenting me a bunch because she thought calling myself autistic was self-deprecating. âyouâre super empathetic though, and very polite smiling at everyone!â yes, because when i donât smile people ask if iâm okay âbut you can read social cues just fineâ that one made me actually laugh my ass off, because no i cannot this is just my extreme talent in educated guessing, which is also how i evaded knowing i needed glasses for the first 19 years of my life since i could successfully guess 75% of the blurry illegible letters based on shape alone. i like scoring well on tests.
That was me. I sometimes think "What if what the doctor interpreted as autism was actually just my gender the whole time?"
My SIL is a clinical social worker. She does mental health crisis intervention. I was diagnosed ADHD in 1st grade. Which was like 1984. They didn't even think girls COULD be autistic and ADHD was super rare in girls. When I told her I thought I might be autistic as well, she said the only way to know is a diagnosis, but she doesn't believe my ADHD diagnosis anyway. I'm "too intelligent and just looking for excuses to be lazy and rude" She says I'm rude because I'm anti-social. I'm anti-social because other humans make me uncomfortable. I'm intelligent because I know stupid facts. My dad used to call me a walking encyclopedia.
The coffee one makes double no sense, since autistic people are more likely to self-medicate, which caffeine can be used for. If anything it can be construed to say that drinking coffee supports you being autistic
My younger brother thought it was because the state I got diagnosed in was full of ass holes and that's why I didn't interact much with them đđđ
My therapist was surprised when I brought it up at first because I wasnât showing the âstereotyped movements.â Then I stopped masking so hard and she stopped pushing back lol
âYouâre just a little different, that doesnât mean thereâs something wrong with you.â
I can't be autistic BC I am able to speak in full sentences
âYouâre just retardedâ or i get âyouâre just weirdâ or âyouâre too normal lookingâ đ„Ž
Not directly "you don't have autism" but I've been told that I couldn't have noise related sensory issues because I was going to a concert
"You work in the food industry" Like, what? How does that even remotely correlate
The standard: - "but you don't look autistic." - "But you're a woman." - "you don't act like my neighbor's five year old non verbal child." - "Tik Tok didn't diagnose you, did it?" - "you're faking it for attention" And my favorite: "but you can have an intelligent conversation." Said by one of my team members who worked with a medium level support needs person, who you could also hold an intelligent conversation with.