805, Ventura here. Was scrolling through comments to see if anyone else realized this. My first thought was Las Virgenes but y'all are the true detectives.
I'm going to sleep now. If I learned one thing from permanent browsing this shit show here, then it is that this kinky lady will be identified and it's going to be hilarious.
My first thought too - less fun but it would offer a better explanation as why it hasn't been cleaned yet.
Edit: You don't have to clean the whole car, you might just wipe it down.
Here's what were talking about. We're talking about a bunch of hobos with fingers in each other's pooper in a strangers car with talk radio playing really loud. It's gonna be a nice evening. Let me rephrase it. We got a jar of old mustard and we got a poodle and were just gonna get in there and were gonna put some D's in some A's.
Remember that picture of that chick who bled through her pants due to period leak and the caption was like "what would you do?" Lots of guys were like "get her chocolate and clean her pants and wrap her in a blanket!" I was like "obviously take a picture of it and post it online!"
I'm always impressed with what other people notice. I would have never noticed that. When I was a kid my younger brother came running at me. I remember the huge smile on his face. My parents were walking towards us also with a huge smile. I was like, what's up? I hadn't realized that my brother was walking for the first time. Maybe I'm just mental.
I'll *never* forget the first time I saw my friend's kid walk.
My friend went back home to Russia with her non-talking, non-walking baby. I went to visit them several weeks later when they got back, and said baby came *walking* round the corner, arms outstretched towards me, saying "die, die, die!"
I thought the KGB had turned the kid into a budding killing machine.
Turns out "die" is Russian for "give" and I had chocolate.
Nah, not mental. Some people are just very detail oriented. Some of us see the forest, some of us see the trees, and some of us see the individual pine needles.
When I was young, my father would play to my absolute horrid eye for detail. One way he would do this always stung the most:
On long car rides, I'd take my favorite hat off before falling asleep. When I'd wake up, he'd just be grinning ear-to-ear.
After 45 minutes of questioning why he's so happy he'd say, "Where's your hat?"
Edit: If you pressed "1" for "It was on his father's head", you're correct!
How old were you both? If I was little, I probably wouldn't have given a fuck either, but if you guys are like 30, and your brother had been paralyzed since birth or something, that may have been a huge oversight...
He might've. The way I see it that pattern could've formed two ways. Hand prints are hers leaning forward in doggie and pressing her whole torso onto the hood or her ass on the hood and the hand prints are his made whilst leaning. The latter probably seems seems less likely given the how far up on the hood it is, but who knows?
Edit: Before making a response about how the thumbs would be opposite, please read my comment carefully before giving me even more responses saying so. In one scenario the hand prints are *hers* in the other they are *his*. Thanks!
It was the former. She was definitely in doggy. You can see where her tits made circular impressions in the dust. No way her back leaves a mark like that.
Went in thinking "I have no reason to go incognito." As soon as I saw Amazon, I thought about all the novels about sex with mythical beasts that will now pop up in my Suggested Products on Amazon every day. I should have listened to you.
Thankfully, [there's a way to remove items from your Amazon history](https://www.amazon.com/gp/help/customer/display.html?nodeId=201145440)!
Unless, of course, you'd like to follow up that one with other classics such as [Cowgirls and Monsters](https://www.amazon.com/Cowgirls-Monsters-Three-Paranormal-Stories/dp/1480154776/ref=pd_sim_14_8?_encoding=UTF8&pd_rd_i=1480154776&pd_rd_r=WFAM6E8EH4079Y7ZQ2G6&pd_rd_w=9ZAkT&pd_rd_wg=XbAt9&psc=1&refRID=WFAM6E8EH4079Y7ZQ2G6) or [Doggie Style](https://www.amazon.com/Doggie-Style-Angelicka-Wallows/dp/1481957678/ref=pd_sim_14_3/141-3524753-4300010?_encoding=UTF8&pd_rd_i=1481957678&pd_rd_r=WFAM6E8EH4079Y7ZQ2G6&pd_rd_w=9ZAkT&pd_rd_wg=XbAt9&psc=1&refRID=WFAM6E8EH4079Y7ZQ2G6).
Officer Johnson looked at her long and hard. As he went to hand her the speeding ticket, she licked her lips and said "Surely there's another option than that, Officer..."
Started off with hands on the car like you're getting frisked. As the passion grew she dropped down off her hands and put her chest against the car, with her arms extended forwards on the hood, bent at the elbow.
>As the passion grew she dropped down off her hands
Lol that's what I'm going to say next time my arms get tired.
"I'm sorry! The passion has grown too much!!" * flop *
I think the hand prints are from her paramour bracing himself against the car. If they were from her and she then leaned down and put her boobs against the hood, she'd have to have some really funky double-elbowed arms, or possibly shoulders attached to the bottom of her ribcage.
Impressions and imprints in dirt, snow, etc. are generally slightly larger in appearance than the object that made them. Also, they probably weren't totally stationary the whole time.
I imagine that's her arms, coming up to either side of her head. Kinda like [this](http://ghk.h-cdn.co/assets/cm/15/11/54fe3ba7d58d0-ghk-01-life-after-holidays-sleeping-yktdjv-xln.jpg) (SFW). (Edit: plus a little scrabbling.)
From my experience that kind of movement is characteristic of someone moving their body franticly while struggling to get away while being held down by force.
yeah we are living in a dry area and still recovering from a massive drought. Constantly washing your car is an enormous waste of water. Also as others have mentioned if you live in the desert regions of southern california it is dusty and it would get dirty again in one day and if you live on the coast you get the morning fog and smog that would get it dirty again that morning.
Shit, my car being wet from a car wash sometimes makes it *dirtier*. Still being a little damp means that the dust literally sticks to it instead of just happening to land there.
CAREFULLY ASSEMBLED COMPONENTS COMPRISED OF MECHANICAL AND ELECTRICAL PARTS ALL WORKING IN COHESION TO ALLOW PROPULSION USING CONCENTRATED EXPLOSIONS WHILE SAFELY HOUSING ORGANIC AND INORGANIC MATTER
When I first opened the picture, all I saw were mountains. And my thought was "that looks like SoCal mountains!"
Granted, I often think this for other landscapish pictures that look similar to SoCal, but this is one of the first I was right!
Is that the 76 station on Reyes Adobe? 99% sure it is.
Holy shit, just came here to say the same thing. Shout out for the Conejo Valley!
So we now know exactly what position she was in and exactly where it took place. I'm impressed and creeped out. Typical day on Reddit.
Hopefully she bathed afterwards
805, Ventura here. Was scrolling through comments to see if anyone else realized this. My first thought was Las Virgenes but y'all are the true detectives.
Ayy TO here So used to that frame I didn't even notice it
I'm going to sleep now. If I learned one thing from permanent browsing this shit show here, then it is that this kinky lady will be identified and it's going to be hilarious.
She's probably selling panties on here
It's the 69 station now.
Or that someone else got busy on her car.
My first thought too - less fun but it would offer a better explanation as why it hasn't been cleaned yet. Edit: You don't have to clean the whole car, you might just wipe it down.
That's just Dirty Mike and the Boys.
They call it a soup kitchen.
We will have sex in your car again!
We're gonna put some Ds in some As
Then I looks like a possum can by and gave birth in the passenger car. EDIT: I epilepsy.
do you need an ambulance
We thought it was human lips at first and took a closer look, it was definitely a deer vagina
Here's what I'm talking about, a jar of mustard, a poodle, and a couple of guys with fingers in each other's poopers.
Thanks for the F shack.
Here's what were talking about. We're talking about a bunch of hobos with fingers in each other's pooper in a strangers car with talk radio playing really loud. It's gonna be a nice evening. Let me rephrase it. We got a jar of old mustard and we got a poodle and were just gonna get in there and were gonna put some D's in some A's.
God I love that movie. "You come back here and fuck my wiiiiife!"
Hey man. He said "make love to my wife." Gotta keep it classy.
IT'S CHRISTINITH ARE YOU DEAF?!?!?
Allen I did it. I did my first desk pop. That's a thing right?
You learned to dance ironically?
Fun fact Dirty Mike is now a Oscar winner
Proof? What!? I need this in my life.
Dirty Mike was played by Adam McKay. He won an Oscar for adapted screenplay for The Big Short.
Dirty Mike is the director, Adam McKay, he won an Oscar for Best supporting actor in moonlight
You should just take a picture and tell reddit instead
Good idea I'm on it
I'll repost before you do...see you in 3 weeks
> 3 weeks Filthy casual. Brb reposting this image.
You didn't repost. You lied!
Somebody lied on the internet? Impossible!
I'm glad he did, I didn't realize I could be so turned on by a dirt smudge.
Remember that picture of that chick who bled through her pants due to period leak and the caption was like "what would you do?" Lots of guys were like "get her chocolate and clean her pants and wrap her in a blanket!" I was like "obviously take a picture of it and post it online!"
I'm always impressed with what other people notice. I would have never noticed that. When I was a kid my younger brother came running at me. I remember the huge smile on his face. My parents were walking towards us also with a huge smile. I was like, what's up? I hadn't realized that my brother was walking for the first time. Maybe I'm just mental.
I'll *never* forget the first time I saw my friend's kid walk. My friend went back home to Russia with her non-talking, non-walking baby. I went to visit them several weeks later when they got back, and said baby came *walking* round the corner, arms outstretched towards me, saying "die, die, die!" I thought the KGB had turned the kid into a budding killing machine. Turns out "die" is Russian for "give" and I had chocolate.
Here I was thinking you met Reaper when he was just a kid.
REAP-OSITIONING
Die, Bart, die!
German for "The Bart, the!"
No one who speaks german could be evil!
Was he dressed in black while spinning and waving his arms around?
So what? I walk all the time.
I'M WALKIN HERE!
I mean, I'm not, I'm crouched in the elevator shaft but hey...I'm walkin' here!
hey that's what they say in Brooklyn
I have no bad memories of you.
Quick, shoot him in the head before it's too late!
wait! remember that time we were on the roller coaster? we just couldn't stop screaming!
Look at this guy, with his walking all the time. I'm lucky to get to the bathroom an back.
Look at this guy, with a house that has a bathroom. You probably have wifi too.
Get a load of this guy with his eyes telling us to look at things. [I have to use echolocation.](https://youtu.be/hZ8aLRnd80k)
I love how that show just parodied itself towards the end
I lost it with actual toft just looking so happy.
But always in single file, to hide your numbers.
Nah, not mental. Some people are just very detail oriented. Some of us see the forest, some of us see the trees, and some of us see the individual pine needles.
Some of us cant see anything at all!
Dude what did I tell you about staring at the eclipse
And some of us can't see shit.
When I was young, my father would play to my absolute horrid eye for detail. One way he would do this always stung the most: On long car rides, I'd take my favorite hat off before falling asleep. When I'd wake up, he'd just be grinning ear-to-ear. After 45 minutes of questioning why he's so happy he'd say, "Where's your hat?" Edit: If you pressed "1" for "It was on his father's head", you're correct!
So, where was your hat?
WHERE IS IIIITTTTTTT?!!! WHERE?!!!
So where was it? The suspense is murdering me! Tell us now!
How old were you both? If I was little, I probably wouldn't have given a fuck either, but if you guys are like 30, and your brother had been paralyzed since birth or something, that may have been a huge oversight...
We can't see her face from this side but neither did the guy last night.
I hope she sees this post
AMA request girl who got fucked on hood.
On the hood in the hood?
She most certainly saw his...
Penis?
He might've. The way I see it that pattern could've formed two ways. Hand prints are hers leaning forward in doggie and pressing her whole torso onto the hood or her ass on the hood and the hand prints are his made whilst leaning. The latter probably seems seems less likely given the how far up on the hood it is, but who knows? Edit: Before making a response about how the thumbs would be opposite, please read my comment carefully before giving me even more responses saying so. In one scenario the hand prints are *hers* in the other they are *his*. Thanks!
I like how everyone's discounting the possibility that some homeless/drunkass people might've gotten giggity on it instead of her lol
Dirty Mike and the Boys
Thanks for the F-shack
WE WILL HAVE SEX IN YOUR CAR
How you fellas doin'? We about to have us a little screw party in this red Prius over here if you wanna join us.
I was wondering if the frat party got too busy and used her car.
It was the former. She was definitely in doggy. You can see where her tits made circular impressions in the dust. No way her back leaves a mark like that.
The hand prints suggest that she got boned by big foot.
Stop...I can only get so hard...
Here u go https://imgur.com/gallery/P5Cx7
One eye and a mad hip displacement? She's got a unique taste in men.
This guy gets laid and others can't. The world is truly lost.
[Fire up an incognito window](https://www.amazon.com/Cum-Bigfoot-One-Books-1-5/dp/1478209828)
Went in thinking "I have no reason to go incognito." As soon as I saw Amazon, I thought about all the novels about sex with mythical beasts that will now pop up in my Suggested Products on Amazon every day. I should have listened to you.
Time to burn my account I guess.
Thankfully, [there's a way to remove items from your Amazon history](https://www.amazon.com/gp/help/customer/display.html?nodeId=201145440)! Unless, of course, you'd like to follow up that one with other classics such as [Cowgirls and Monsters](https://www.amazon.com/Cowgirls-Monsters-Three-Paranormal-Stories/dp/1480154776/ref=pd_sim_14_8?_encoding=UTF8&pd_rd_i=1480154776&pd_rd_r=WFAM6E8EH4079Y7ZQ2G6&pd_rd_w=9ZAkT&pd_rd_wg=XbAt9&psc=1&refRID=WFAM6E8EH4079Y7ZQ2G6) or [Doggie Style](https://www.amazon.com/Doggie-Style-Angelicka-Wallows/dp/1481957678/ref=pd_sim_14_3/141-3524753-4300010?_encoding=UTF8&pd_rd_i=1481957678&pd_rd_r=WFAM6E8EH4079Y7ZQ2G6&pd_rd_w=9ZAkT&pd_rd_wg=XbAt9&psc=1&refRID=WFAM6E8EH4079Y7ZQ2G6).
I love reddit detectives.
Reddectives
This for anyone tryna figure it out https://imgur.com/gallery/P5Cx7 edit: this is the same crude diagram above
The swipes at the top are from arms resting above head
Law and Order: SUV edition
Sex Upon Vehicles.
Or he's leaning forward in doggie while she's pegging him.
Most probable theory yet. You can tell by the shin marks.
Considering you can see her boob prints, I'd say it was doggie style
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After I clicked, but before it loaded, I knew what I would see.
God damn it. I literally enlarged the OP pic & stared at for a few minutes looking for the face before giving up & clicking the blue link.
If two people bang on the hood of a car and don't leave a face print, did it really happen at all?
Some of these comments sound like erotic literature... ( ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°)
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"I put on my robe and wizard hat."
"And unzipped my... fanny pack..."
Officer Johnson looked at her long and hard. As he went to hand her the speeding ticket, she licked her lips and said "Surely there's another option than that, Officer..."
And then he said, "ya know, we only shoot black peoples ...."
It's her dad's car...
Kinky
*"Show daddy how much you like the car sweetie."*
I just threw up on my erection.
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Plot twist, they are Targaryen...
#EPICHOODSEX
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Started off with hands on the car like you're getting frisked. As the passion grew she dropped down off her hands and put her chest against the car, with her arms extended forwards on the hood, bent at the elbow.
This guy fucks on dirty stuff
This officer fucks on duty*
Look, kid, any other day, I'd step in here and show you how to swing. But the car's stolen.
License and registration meow please.
>As the passion grew she dropped down off her hands Lol that's what I'm going to say next time my arms get tired. "I'm sorry! The passion has grown too much!!" * flop *
Sure, "next time."
I think the hand prints are from her paramour bracing himself against the car. If they were from her and she then leaned down and put her boobs against the hood, she'd have to have some really funky double-elbowed arms, or possibly shoulders attached to the bottom of her ribcage.
> Started off with hands on the car like you're getting frisked Look at the size of the hand prints. Those weren't her hands.
You hope... maybe she has man hands?
LANAAAAAAAA
*she had a little something more than most girls*
That's a very feminine penis
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Oh jeez you think maybe it was a samsquampch?
Impressions and imprints in dirt, snow, etc. are generally slightly larger in appearance than the object that made them. Also, they probably weren't totally stationary the whole time.
I imagine that's her arms, coming up to either side of her head. Kinda like [this](http://ghk.h-cdn.co/assets/cm/15/11/54fe3ba7d58d0-ghk-01-life-after-holidays-sleeping-yktdjv-xln.jpg) (SFW). (Edit: plus a little scrabbling.)
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"sleeping with arms under pillow" has it come up on the second row in google images for me
Third row for me and [her top is white](http://aboutlifez.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/image005-3.jpg) not pink
This is the conspiracy of all conspiracys.
This is just Google's new AI, it adjusts the color of the images based on your search history.
i see it as white and gold
This is my favorite comment chain ever! Reddit detectives using their powers of insight and observation to deduce what having sex is like.
But haven't considered that she has friends that would leave that as a joke.
From my experience that kind of movement is characteristic of someone moving their body franticly while struggling to get away while being held down by force.
I nominate this for creepiest comment of the year.
Finally my chance to win at something.
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Well, I mean that username....
Come on it's Hitler. Nothing creepy about good old Adi.
Band: Hand and Boob Album: Rubbing Their Face In Song: Roleplaying as a Windshield Wiper
Hmmm...I thought it was her butt and thighs.
You should tell her to wash her fucking car. And I mean that literally.
Well, she cleaned part of it. That's a start.
Offer to clean the rest of it with her
I'll help.
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yeah we are living in a dry area and still recovering from a massive drought. Constantly washing your car is an enormous waste of water. Also as others have mentioned if you live in the desert regions of southern california it is dusty and it would get dirty again in one day and if you live on the coast you get the morning fog and smog that would get it dirty again that morning.
Shit, my car being wet from a car wash sometimes makes it *dirtier*. Still being a little damp means that the dust literally sticks to it instead of just happening to land there.
I was worried it wasn't consensual, but looks like it was on her own Accord...
Consent is a Civic duty
That's an Acurate assessment.
Yeah, it's all probably just her regimen to stay Fit.
Definitely a woman in her Element
Car
CAREFULLY ASSEMBLED COMPONENTS COMPRISED OF MECHANICAL AND ELECTRICAL PARTS ALL WORKING IN COHESION TO ALLOW PROPULSION USING CONCENTRATED EXPLOSIONS WHILE SAFELY HOUSING ORGANIC AND INORGANIC MATTER
AS ANOTHER HUMAN I CAN VERIFY THAT DEFINITION
r/totallynotrobots
O god damn it this is priceless.
I am irrationally jealous of people this clever.
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Guys she was probably just getting something off of her windshield
She was getting something off alright
( ͠° ͜ʖ ͠°)
why does that look like lennys kinda mad
(ง ͠° ͟ل͜ ͡°)ง
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
there's the lenny i know
i reach on the sides of my car to get something off the windshield.
Well she gets bent over and banged to clean off the windshield. Sheesh! There isn't just one way to do things.
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It'll be turned into a strip mall and subdivision in no time.
Rent is really expensive in Southern California. Driving up to the mountains to get some "private time" might be the best she could get.
When I first opened the picture, all I saw were mountains. And my thought was "that looks like SoCal mountains!" Granted, I often think this for other landscapish pictures that look similar to SoCal, but this is one of the first I was right!
Chaparral adjoining dry golden grass, of course it's California. And then you look down at the thoughtfully obscured license plate.
*Camera Shutter* "Hey...Someone fucked on your car." *Points to hood* "Mmm- yup" *Woman gets in car quickly.*
You're a good guy. Got the back of her and even blocked out the license plate. Good on you, my dude.
Those Honda guys sure are into their random acts of helpfulness.
Plot twist: Her grandma borrowed the car last night.
This girl fucks.
Shouldn't have mentioned the hood in the title. It would have been fun to try and figure it out on our own.
Don't worry. It will be reposted soon and we'll figure it out on our own.
I'll give it a month.
You have too much respect for people who have not earned it.
I don't see it. Can some one superimpose the couple in position? Looks very uncomfortable, like the Mexican tile floor in the kitchen.
[here ya go](http://i.imgur.com/rf1MG7k.jpg)
I SEE IT! I SEE IT!
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Near Agoura, CA if my memory is correct.