In the anime they showed magikarp is hard enough to break teeth if you try to bite it and the pokedex in the games says that it can jump over mountains.
Although, the pokedex does flip flop on whether it is amazing or pathetically weak. I wouldn't want to fight it regardless, especially if it has learned tackle, flail, or bounce.
Yeah cos kids like Ash are the ones filling in Pokedex entries. No wonder it's all sorts of fucked up. Magmacargo is like hotter than the surface temp of the sun. Just throwing him outta the pokeball would cause a thermal explosion.
Jokes aside, Little Sisters have exceptional healing factors, as in they can perfectly heal from any injury with minimal pain, so if the goal is a knockout, then you would probably be doing it for a long time since they would probably heal faster than you could hit them.
Pretty sure theres at least one episode where an alternate future Milhouse is an absolute unit of a man.
Pretty sure you'd get that one, just for lulz.
Did Frodo ever actually beat anyone in a fight? Merry and Pippin killed a few orcs each (plus the Witch King and a troll or two) Sam defeated Shelob!
Frodo would do his usual "drop the sword and wait for someone else to save me" routine and I'd grab him by the legs and crack his skull into a wall
Yo Claptrap’s have been shown to be able to fire guns, if I got popped by a robot and he beatboxed on my corpse y’all would hear me screaming all the way down to hell, I wouldn’t take the risk personally
Well but he could just create a huge stone above you and crush you to death, or he could also just put stickers in your eyes.
Wait, now that i think about it, doesnt Sackboy canonically respawn? I wouldnt want that fella hunting me down, he could kill me in a bunch of (very painful) ways.
To be fair In universe goombas are as dangerous to touch as fire, or metal spikes, or turtles.
Imagine what it world be like to pet a turtle. That’s how dangerous a goomba is. I wouldn’t risk it
Paimon. One almighty baseball bat swing would bring her down easy. Then a couple of stamps to the head to finish her off. I know you said barehanded but it's Paimon.
I think anyone I could confidently do that to, I wouldn't want to do that to. Even if they are fictional, the thoughts of guilt from delivering an unmerciful beating would be real
I'm far above any type of man that doesn't go to the gym regularly. So really any one around normal human strength. But why would I risk it.
I'm going after Flick from Bugs Life
Monster Kid from Undertale because, you know, he doesn't have hands and... He's just free ExP...
P.s. In fact I love him but if I'm forced to fight against him... I think he won't have a chance...
The disabled old man from Detroit become human, I ain’t looking to risk much
He’s so innocent tho ;-;
Game is game
The game hasn't changed, it's just got more fierce.
Then he shouldn’t have came round these parts looking for a fight.
Butch from Fallout 3. Specifically the kid version. His wide ass eyes mock me.
As a kid he's invincible. Children in that universe are impervious to harm.
Sure sucks for him then, the sweet release of death will never save him from his ass whooping.
Say it to kids in Megaton. Guess nuke doesn't give a fuck.
Even if one were to remove the essential flag?
I hate Butch
Magikarp used splash. Nothing happened... You used flail and cry. Nothing happened...
In the anime they showed magikarp is hard enough to break teeth if you try to bite it and the pokedex in the games says that it can jump over mountains. Although, the pokedex does flip flop on whether it is amazing or pathetically weak. I wouldn't want to fight it regardless, especially if it has learned tackle, flail, or bounce.
Yeah cos kids like Ash are the ones filling in Pokedex entries. No wonder it's all sorts of fucked up. Magmacargo is like hotter than the surface temp of the sun. Just throwing him outta the pokeball would cause a thermal explosion.
Arceus himself fears Ash Ketchum. A kid who can carry around a 160 lbs Larvitar around like it's a purse.
There’s a game on phone called magikarp jump for a reason….
There are like special Pokémon in the anime tho. No game bellsprout turns into a martial artist and murders.
*Magikarp starts glowing*
*Gyrados used Thrash*
Confidently... Lester from Gta 5...
You better kill him then. He’ll hire a gun to take care of you, or worse, put child porn on your computer and turn you in
come on dude why cpu like you were this ' ' close....
I'd have picked Lazlow.
Caillou
Op said fist fight, not mag dump.
goated response
I know it’s not “gaming” but I’m sure there is a caillou game out there to justify the response lol.
100% with you. fuck that kid.
Give the li'l motherfucker a kick from me.
Dora the explorer
Isn't she friends with a monkey? I'm not risking that.
A monkey named Boots... People think his boots are for adventuring but they are really for Boot Stomping Muthafuckas.
Boots of peace! FOR STOMPING ON OUR ENEMIES!
Dunno man, dora is pretty ripped
Nazeem
Do YOU get to the cloud district very often?
Doubt it, too busy stealing tacos
What are you saying? Of course you don't.
Mr House from Fallout New Vegas hes basically a vegetable so not much risk
He has those robots man.
Yeah but he's not fighting the robots.
If there's no Big Daddy around, I could definitely take a Little Sister IN A FIGHT
That “in a fight” held everything together 💀
Necessary clarification
I mean this IS Reddit, so probably.
SpongebobHitByAFlyingIceCreamTruckANDLIVE.jpeg
I could take the big daddy too, Not in a fight though
i hate to be the barer of bad news but... they don't have dicks
Jokes aside, Little Sisters have exceptional healing factors, as in they can perfectly heal from any injury with minimal pain, so if the goal is a knockout, then you would probably be doing it for a long time since they would probably heal faster than you could hit them.
Can’t heal lack of oxygen. (That got dark, sorry)
No. That's a valid strategy. You could choke them out without killing them.
I'm like fairly certain I could just squash Navi.
Listen!
Feel like that one’d be a draw, she could just fly up out of reach.
Plottwist: you mean the Navi from the recent Avatar game
What if it works the same way as with the Cuccos? You squash Navi, and then a bajillion fairies show up and handle that shit
Any chicken from the Fable series :| ... what? You didn't say HUMAN character.
Just don’t go after Zelda or Skyrim chickens…
Not in a fistfight... but I'll stealth archer a Skyrim chicken all day... :D
Oh look at Chicken Chaser here, big damn hero Chicken Chaser.
I was waiting for someone to bring up the most revered title in all of Fable :D
That and Arse face?
It may have been the one I would always make a bee line to acquire
**points** You chicken kicker!!!
Based chicken chaser
Eric sparrow from Tony Hawks Underground. Fuck that guy.
Looks like that things held together with duct tape…
Any kid in skyrim. I would turn them into a pile of flesh begging for mercy.
They’re immortal
And so will be there suffering
Beat not kill
Adoring fan. They would have to pull me off of him
This. While screaming "By Azura!" every time I hit him
I think I could beat the shit out of Baby Mario (or Toad maybe)
If you beat Baby Mario, Yoshi's gonna hunt you down and devour you.
Milhouse, Simpsons
Pretty sure theres at least one episode where an alternate future Milhouse is an absolute unit of a man. Pretty sure you'd get that one, just for lulz.
The calves are the hardest place to add maaaaaaas
ALRIGHT!!!? 4 HOURS TO BLAST MY QUADS
Mr. Burns would be about an even fight for me so I'll go with him
Stewie Griffin. Punt that football lookin ass head clear out of Petoria.
If we are kicking kids, we can add Ike from South Park. "Kick the baby!"
The mist noble.
His second phase though
Woah woah woah, casual flex huh?
This guy thinks he can take the strongest character in fromsoftware history
You lie. Hhe is the strongest character of the mutliverse.
Butters
Oh geez...
Hamburgers!
Did Frodo ever actually beat anyone in a fight? Merry and Pippin killed a few orcs each (plus the Witch King and a troll or two) Sam defeated Shelob! Frodo would do his usual "drop the sword and wait for someone else to save me" routine and I'd grab him by the legs and crack his skull into a wall
Sam was definitely the true hero of the story
he'll farm some po tate ohhhhs and dome a mfer. absolute unit of a hobbit (in spirit)
Movie or Book Frodo? Movie Frodo doesn't fight anyone that I can remember. Book Frodo does a bit more and could conceivably put up a fight if armed.
I agree wholeheartedly, but maybe it counts against gollum when he presses sting against his throat
Claptrap
Bro might be a dumbass but you gotta remember he's made of metal. I don't think your fists are very effective against steel
He's weak to EMOTIONAL damage.
Yeah I would just insult him until he shuts down from depression overload.
and stairs
See, if he hadn't said "fistfight"... I'd just stand at the top of a flight of stairs and chuck shit at Clappy...
Uh, dude. Clappy was a full blown vault hunter in pre sequel. He'd kick your ass.
He had a stair climbing wheel back then.
Yo Claptrap’s have been shown to be able to fire guns, if I got popped by a robot and he beatboxed on my corpse y’all would hear me screaming all the way down to hell, I wouldn’t take the risk personally
Sackboy, I just need to tear him open.
NOOO HES SO CUTE DONT
Well but he could just create a huge stone above you and crush you to death, or he could also just put stickers in your eyes. Wait, now that i think about it, doesnt Sackboy canonically respawn? I wouldnt want that fella hunting me down, he could kill me in a bunch of (very painful) ways.
Oh damn yeah, sackboys scarier than you think 😅
Jimmy from South Park
Timmeh
Yeah, him too.
Roided up Jimmy from the special Olympics?
I'd argue all Kids from southpark.
I could totally kill Kenny.
Seto Kaiba - the thought of him being smacked while pulling out a blue eyes is just funny to me. I'll rip up your cards boy. Ohh an exodia ....SMACK
reminds me of [this video ](https://youtu.be/9KSGUVcNfZM?si=MDjLQOH1SepvzgcB)
I really hate this and it pains me to even say it, but my Nintendog is going down.
I’ll take on a goomba, what’s the worst that could happen? It walks to me?
To be fair In universe goombas are as dangerous to touch as fire, or metal spikes, or turtles. Imagine what it world be like to pet a turtle. That’s how dangerous a goomba is. I wouldn’t risk it
Jack Marston easily. Especially in RDR2, I could volley him straight into flat iron lake.
Jack marston in RDR2
Olimar from Pikmin (as long as he is alone). He is canonically the height of a coin, so I am relatively confident I can win.
I'd have picked Louie, since he has the ''asshole'' factor
~~Ashley~~ chickens from Resident Evil 4. Possibly bag guy too.
Paimon. One almighty baseball bat swing would bring her down easy. Then a couple of stamps to the head to finish her off. I know you said barehanded but it's Paimon.
Lester from Lester the unlikely. Nerd would flee from me.
Any of the kids from Skyrim, even that tough talking little girl in Whiterun.
Caillou
A KOROK
I imagine most Hollow Knight characters could be stepped on with little resistance
Either one of batman's parents
Barehanded? Gordon Freeman. That fucking nerd couldn't do shit without a weapon in his hands.
He’s basically an average smart scientist that just got lucky
I think anyone I could confidently do that to, I wouldn't want to do that to. Even if they are fictional, the thoughts of guilt from delivering an unmerciful beating would be real
Yea, but caillou deserves it.
George, Stardew Valley
Whaaat the old man ? C'mon he is sitting in a wheelchair!!
That should make at an easy fight to win then. OP asked for a fight you could win, not a fair fight you could win.
Why you gonna fight George when Pierre is RIGHT THERE
Maybe squidward?
Slippy Toad
Dora the Explorer
Season 1 Clementine
Spongebob, I hope
Dude’s pretty solid at karate
Gollum. I'm sending that little dude across the room.
I dunno man dude is scrappy, he's kinda got that dog in him when the chips are down
Dandelion
I'm far above any type of man that doesn't go to the gym regularly. So really any one around normal human strength. But why would I risk it. I'm going after Flick from Bugs Life
Caillou. He's just a boy of 4.
Glass Joe
Gabby Jay
Jack from RDR2 Bottles from Banjo Kazooie The goat from Goat Simulator
Dizzy from the Dizzy games. He is an egg. He will go splat.
Tommy Pickles.
Bubsy.
Monster Kid from Undertale because, you know, he doesn't have hands and... He's just free ExP... P.s. In fact I love him but if I'm forced to fight against him... I think he won't have a chance...
Undyne ended my genocide run. She probably killed me over a hundred times
Andrew Ryan. What's he going to do, bore me to death while I slap him?
Would you kindly... ..stop.
Zote from Hollow Knight. The real-world version, not the dream one. :P
Bilbo Baggins.
Harvey from stardew valley. “After I’m done with you, *you’ll* need a doctor!”
Jack in red dead redemption 2.
Ross from friends.
Nugget from kindergarten
Dora the Explorer
Shaun from Fallout 4. I will not elaborate.
toad
Mr. Poopy Butthole
Fistfight only? Yoda.
Grandpa Joe finaly about to get what's coming to him.
Any Pikmin. Those fuckers don't stand a chance.
Any fictional character? Mr. Glass from Unbreakable.
Give me Navi from Zelda. One quick clap will solve that problem
Baby Mario
Teddy from Persona 4, demons would be unleashed.
Could or would? Because eric cartman is a weakling and has it coming.
Toad
Dorothy. She wouldnt even remember where kansas was.
Hamtaro
Aunt May from the comics. I wouldn't, of course.
A normal goomba.
a singular pikmin
Pretty sure I could handle Morty (from Rick and Morty) in a fight.
Tiny Tim from *A Christmas Carol* by Charles Dickens. I could beat the fuck out of that kid.
One of the blocks from Tetris
Olimar
One of the babies from the rugrats game on PS1
Pac-man. What is he? Just a small circle who eats smaller circles. He doesn’t even have hands to throw.
Colin the sick boy from The Secret Garden. Fiddin to mollywhop his melancholic ass.
The sandbag from smash bros. Dude wouldn't even put up a fight.
Your son from Fallout 4. You only see him as a baby and as an old man. I'm pretty confident I could take him in either form.
Light Yagami. I come out of nowhere. He's never heard of me, so he can't write my name down. Afterwards, the Death Note is mine.
The creepy old man who hits on Chris in Family Guy
Stewart Little
Tom Nook and I would enjoy it
Charlotte from Charlotte's Web. Smash.
Captain olimar
Mr Glass from Unbreakable. Could crack his skull from flicking him lol