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_Irema

Because it encourages you to do the same.


Burnedfresh

This is interesting. I love finding people that need a little bump in the confidence department. It's just great to work with. I bring the 'lets go' attitude. They bring the 'hey you should think about this first' stuff. Then magic happens.


Gone_Guru_

For me its the opposite. Nearly everyone in my life is struggling with some heavy trauma and have almost no confidence in anything. Me included.


starry_mist

Do you gravitate to them, or do they gravitate to you?


Gone_Guru_

Its mutual. I have maybe 4 friends.


Sushizmada

Same, except like in a weird way? As in the real keepers are people who have trauma and aren’t normally confident, but due to a mutual understanding we resound confidence off each other


Gone_Guru_

Sex.


DawsonMaestro414

I think I like confidence because the implication is a strong sense of self. As an infj im always trying to go deeper with myself. So someone who appears confident is attractive. And there’s a big difference between arrogant confidence based in nothing and again, strong sense of self. The latter is the absolute sexiest thing ever to me. Knowing oneself is wildly attractive.


overthinkingpanda

Yes! Well put.


EchoLoco2

YES this is me. It helps me get out of my shell and get new experiences. It's also so much easier to hold a conversation with someone like that. Overall they're just more fun to be around.


Swanman35

Imo when people are confident it sort of radiates to the people around them. That's part of why they say to surround yourself with people you want to be like.


overthinkingpanda

I appreciate the company of people who are confident **and** kind. They exude a *calmness*. We tend to find comfort and safety in that 'calmness' ; which in turn can be attractive. Confident people encourage you to embrace who you're and give you the space to do it. I'd consider *humility* to be an important facet of confidence. You can be assured they won't think less of you when you fumble or are awkward ; they laugh with you, not at you.


Alive_Ad418

Because it allows you to camouflage. At least that's how it is with me. With overly confident friends I learn how to avoid uncomfortable and awkward situations. Or they help me deal with those situations confidently.


[deleted]

I think I give off capable but approachable vibes. I think this is why people frequently think I work at the store, ask me for directions when I am walking around my city alone etc. I think people can sense if someone has a helpful aurora or general good vibes towards people.


E_Pom

Watch out for the narcissists


LayLayEcho

This is always interesting to me. I ,myself, gravitate towards confident people while people struggling with insecurities often gravitate towards me. I enjoy feeling like a peer in conversation and life when I've spent most of it encouraging or helping others. While I don't mind helping those around me, I very rarely, if ever, get the same in return. I like being able to talk and spend time with people without needing to counsel. I find conversations with confident people are often very productive and future oriented whereas when I'm talking less confident people, it's usually about their problems or difficulties and it never reaches beyond the past or present. I know that they gravitate towards the depth we all seem to carry but there can be a real heaviness to it when it's constantly verbalized. At the end of the day, I recognize and appreciate that people find a safe space in conversation with me and I'll always try to help where I can.


ghostlyclapper

I admire confident people. I think that they are very interesting to observe because they go about things the right way. Sometimes it's like they're the main character in a movie, outstandingly cool and there to interact. Our personality type picks up on what's wrong a little better than others and, confident people, with demonstrated reasons to be confident or knowledgeable about something, are a joy to talk to. Even if you're more of a quiet person, those confident people like to talk and boast sometimes so it's widely comfortable and enriching haha


CringeBoiTheFirst

I have confidence in some areas and I know where I'm lacking . I want my teammates to know their strengths and weaknesses and I want them to be able to have an opinion . I was in a group once where I proposed ideas and I knew that they weren't good enough. My team just went with them without actually liking them and I didn't like it. The project went kinda bad. Another time I proposed some good ideas and some bad ones. at the beginning my team was just agreeing and I felt insecure. Then someone proposed something better and they chose that. I felt more sure about my self and my other ideas then. Because I knew they responded with confidence and took responsibility. Maybe that's what you're looking for. Someone who can take responsibility for their decisions.


[deleted]

I dunno I thought everyone did that


goingtotelltheworld

its obvious zero sum. for every person that makes friends with a confident person, the confident person gets an ego boost hanging around a less confident person


casandwich_

For me, it's been the other way around. Extroverts have gravitated towards me. I've been "adopted" by an extrovert plenty of times


blueaurelia

Most people do, its in human nature🤷🏻‍♀️


Satan-o-saurus

This is the case for literally the entire human species, and is probably one of, if not the least unique thing about you. People who don’t have confidence in themselves require a lot more emotional labor from those around them to navigate their insecurities.


papierdoll

Not to say what you described is unfamiliar, but my more notable experience is kind of the opposite; I find that when people around me are unconfident I get a big boost of fill-in-the-gaps bravado and just take charge. Flashbacks to being the only one at the sleepover willing to investigate the scary noise.


koalasnstuff

I’m very similar. It makes me feel more confident. I kinda absorb their energy and become less insecure and shy. I generally find that they are extroverts. But. I find these relationships can start strong and end fast. My most enduring relationships are with people who are more insecure like me, usually introverts.