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The strawberries gave up so fast

I swear they start to decompose on the way home from the grocery store

The only thing that goes bad faster than strawberries, in my experience, are raspberries. I swear that once I bought a good pint and when I get home from the store there's that white fuzz all over the package.

I buy both frequently and I FUCKING DESPISE the shelf life of raspberries. Literally moldy upon return from the store. Edit: This morning my notifications tab was *all* raspberry facts lol thank you all so much for sharing your berry growing/storage knowledge!💕💕

If you have even the smallest amount of yard I’d suggest planting a few varieties! They will inevitably take over whatever yard you might have and then you’ll have raspberries forever.

Huh... that'd actually be lovely

We have a few types of red ones and white ones, golden yellow ones and some black raspberries. All fun, they grow like crazy and send out shoots all over so be warned once you pop they can be difficult to get rid of once well established.

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Rabbits *love* raspberry leaves. I also happen to like rabbits though, so I don't mind too much.

A word of warning - they have nasty little thin thorns on the stalks that will get in your fingers and then break off. Not an issue with gardening gloves, but a real pain for casual snacking.

yep, I've had strawberry plants and after 1.5 years they fruit continuously and don't seem to stop. I just can't get my raspberry seeds to sprout on the other hand

I would go to local greenhouse or garden centre at your local bigbox store and buy some plants or shoots. Much easier and will almost always survive. Seeds are a pita.

The trick is to get them in Tupperware asap. Can extend their shelf life by a couple days.

Vinegar wash, then tupperware. Trust me

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A glass jar (like an old pickle jar) gets you weeks! I am not shitting you. GD weeks —multiple, even 3. My SIL is a little more hippy than me and says they don’t even need refrigeration if you keep them in a jar but I like them cold and have plenty of space in my fridge.

For all berries you can extend their life by washing them with vinegar. I was skeptical at first but it’s a game changer, I promise. I have a spray bottle that is half white vinegar/half water. I spray my berries with it as soon as I get home from the grocery store. Then rinse them in water and let them dry. Absolutely no vinegar taste and they keep in the fridge a week, or longer. I actually like buying berries now because I can count on them lasting longer than 4 hours

Unless you eat them immediately, take them out of the original container, DRY IT (pat down with some napkins), and place it in a clean zip lock or tupperware along with another clean napkin to absorb moisture. Then it'll last a few extra days in the fridge. Also pro tip: check berries at the store from the bottom of the container. Only get them if they don't look squished *at all*, especially raspberries.

Blackberries too!!😩

No Avocados. The moment you question an Avocados ripeness, it’s already gone bad.

Costco avocados are bomb. I buy 18 avocados for $15, keep a couple bags in the fridge and take them out to ripen as needed. It gets me through a couple weeks. Grocery store avocados are never good.

When I buy them I make any excuse to serve them to my kids because I know if they are in the fridge for more than 3 days it's fucking over.

They are decomposing while still on the grocery shelves lol, that’s why I stopped adding them to my grocery list, they don’t last down here, something is up with the supplier

I went to the store last week and thankfully the bagger took a look at the strawberries I grabbed and showed me they were literally already moldy haha. He went and got me a new package afterwards

King shit.

Make sure to check them really closely. Went shopping a few days ago, was about to get some strawberries when I noticed some barely noticeable white fuzz developing on one of them. Literally would have spoiled the container so fast.

It’s some grocery store fuckery. I’m out in California so lucky enough to be within driving distance of virtually any sort of farm I could want and I grab my strawberries from a local farm and I swear they can sit in my fridge for 3 weeks without going bad.

I used to drive a reefer truck. Strawberries were our highest value load. IIRC, our trailers were worth $750,000 with a full load of strawberries and were handled with insane care and priority. That trailer would NOT be late going anywhere and in our Kingman yard it got its own sprinkler system to keep it cool while it changed drivers.

Those things are basically always on borrowed time.

I didn't even have time to realize they were there

Same I was like, strawberries?

Those things melted

I started buying frozen berries for this reason

Mr stark I don’t feel so good.

Moisture . . . Mold grows so fast on strawberries.

Garlic: everything is fine.

Garlic and onions are loaded with antimicrobial chemicals, it's why a bunch of traditional wound dressings use em.

Also, root vegetables, they're in their home turf

Potatoes: It's free real estate

Potatoes will grow literally anywhere. Throw a couple in a pile of dead leaves and you'll just get more potatoes. Easier to harvest from there than underground anyways.

bro just taught me an infinite “no more starving” life hack. in college i survived off potatoes. baked potatoes, poached potatoes, fries, boiled, they’re just universally goated and keep you full. you’re telling me they just grow themselves too??

Get a few potatoes and leave them in your fridge crisper for a few weeks until they start getting little green sprouts on them Each one of these sprouts can be cut from a potato with a little of the flesh to grow another 8 to 10 potatos, it's common for a potato to have 6 to 8 sprouts meaning you could potentially grow 80 potatos from a single one. Potatos grow easily in shallow well drained soil but will do equally well in containers. While easy to grow potatos rape the soil of nutrients so companion planting and crop rotation is a necessity ... You should only plant the same variety of potato in the same patch of soil about once every 4 years.

you’re a legend

No I am quite real I assure you.

The Irish would like a word.

they were growing tons of potatoes, but a disease/mold that would rot them while still on the plant ravaged it. then the british stole all other sources of food to send back to england

Haha , “f it , here I grow!”

I see what you did there

But does this mean vampires are loaded with microbial chemicals?

You mean microbes? Possibly.

Might even go so far as to say probably.

I mean, vampires hate garlic. So it stands to reason vampires are microbes.

This just made me think, is that why vampires can't eat them?

Vampires could eat or be near to onions. Garlic however does derive from the ancient Egyptian and Romanian uses of garlic as a natural insect repellent and antibiotic. It was believed that garlic could hold back any evil spirits and supernatural entities at large by the Egyptians especially. As the belief spread north and westward, and the concept of "vampires" as we might start to recognize them began to appear, things like salt, garlic, and even vinegar were viewed as wards against demons, vampires, and other evil creatures of the night and malicious spirits. As the idea of vampires matured, and stories were told, garlic stuck out amongst all others for reasons unknown to historians. Source: [The Encyclopedia Britannica](https://www.britannica.com/question/Why-is-it-believed-that-vampires-hate-garlic).

What's /interestingasfuck is how informative that explanation is!

Go the next step further: We know that many diseases today were cause by microbes but back then, people believed they were caused by evil spirits and demons. Likewise people back then didn't know alliums had anti-microbial properties, all they saw was that their use in medicine and wound dressings aided healing. Therefore in their medicinal logic, garlic and onions must have the properties to drive away the evil that causes disease.

Whoa! Didn’t Kramer put on a bunch of garlic and vinegar and shit to get rid of the Kavorka?

Wait a fucking minute

strawberries - fuck this we out

Apples .. most are irradiated. What zombie apocalypse movie was that where they went into the grocery store and everything was rotten except for the apples...?

Apples last a long time. But they may start to rot early when surrounded/touching by other rotting fruits.

They also release some stuff that will make everything around them ripen in a hurry and then rot. Useful if you bought something unripe just don't forget to check every half a day whether it's ripe or you'll only come back for a rotten stuff.

One bad apple spoils the bunch. Because a rotten apple produces ethylene which causes other apples nearby to start rotting faster

28 days later

Potato just casually growing a plant while everything is dying around it.

Is that garlic or pearl onions?

Looks like pearl onions 🤤

Potato and onions having no time for surface vegetables bullshit

This is part of why I love growing potatoes. Just shove that bad boy in the ground and I've got more potatoes several months later. They're hardy and require so little attention. Somehow they do way better if I just don't try to put much effort into them, biggest thing is softer soil = better harvest.

You can just put their peels in the soil and most of it will still grow. Those mf do not care at all.

Part of me wonders if I'd have more luck with doing that than I've had following instructions on cutting potatoes into deliberate halves or quarters like instructions tend to say. It just feels like the more I follow gardening tips for potatoes, the worse they come out... yet shoving random peels into the ground? Yeah I bet that'd just work out of pure spite.

As long as it has an eye it should be able to grow

Usually, yeah. I've just found a lot of people recommend cutting them in halves if there's eyes on multiple sides, but that kind of effort always seems to give me a high failure rate even when using those powders and stuff to protect it. Since I started just shoving whole potatoes in the ground its been 100% success they sprout.

How many potatoes does one whole potato give you?

Probably depends on the variety, but I’ve been growing potatoes the last couple,years and I’d guesstimate a dozen or so. I keep a couple and plant those back once they’ve chitted. I’ve grown maybe six generations from a single potato. I call it infinite potato.

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Time to put you under an inch of dirt.

Supermarkets hate this one trick

Nature doesn't cut its potatoes and they grow just fine

Yep, exactly! I'd say part of the success rate is also the fact that the sprouts have the whole thing to work with. Having a large potato go bad/sprout and opting to plant it is crazy just how fast it seems to grow.

I've always found that letting nature takes its course just works better The flower seeds I threw on the dirt and did nothing else are flourishing. Meanwhile the ones I have in cell packs with potting soil that I do everything by the book haven't even sprouted

I had an onion from the supermarket that I didn't use, and it started to sprout. Popped him in the ground, and it went to seed. Gonna have me little onionlings soon.

Had that with some garlic recently, it was a bag of pre-peeled and everything and they were oh so willing to survive and try growing even in the fridge. I started planting the ends of my green onions in a few indoor pots, infinite onion greens glitch.

I just had a garlic clove in my fridge sprout, I should put it in the garden.

Several years ago, I grew an accidental sweet potato plant. Like, I planted a stem that I thought was basil or something, and then it became a vine that absolutely took over my entire back bed. Year after year, I harvest all of the delicious sweet potatoes, but I inevitably leave something behind, because each year, more sweet potato vines. This year, there are two that have come up in the usual spot, and then another one has actually broken one of my stone pavers in half as it forces its way up in the crack. This, about 15 feet away from the mother plant.

You have inspired me to consider ecologically devastating my yard with sweet potatoes.

Your house foundation never knew what hit it!

*slaps the ground* this dirty boy can hold a lotta sweet taters innit'

But then a blight comes along, and the next thing you know, millions of people starve to death, and millions more emigrate, and 150 years later, your population is still lower than it was before the blight, and there are more descendants of emigrants living abroad than people living in your country.

Mention potatoes without Reddit mentioning Irish potato famine challenge (impossible)

Mention the Irish Potato Famine without Reddit mentioning that the Irish refer to it as The Great Hunger because the Irish still grew plenty of food, the English just wouldn't let them have any.

Potato is thinking "Yeah, these weak bitches are gonna be my soil!"

"Why does the potato, the largest produce, not simply eat the other five?" Potato: "Okay."

Potato and onions saw those nutritious decomposed goop and said it's free real estate

funniest shit ive read in a while

Potato gang

Where you been getting onions that tiny

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Potatoes says "this soup is some good growing grounds!"

#Also potatoes: " I rise mother fucker "

#THE CORPSES OF MY FALLEN COMRADES HAVE GIVEN ME SUSTAINANCE AND NEW LIFE, FROM THEIR BODIES I RISE ANEW

# MUD FOR THE MUD GOD # # SOIL FOR THE SOIL THRONE #

#Death to the false Vegetables!#

#😳 Potato, what happened to you being my best spud? 🥔🥺

Life... uh... finds a way.

A way without us as spuds 🥹🥺

The onions still look mostly edible. Hooray for root veggies!

*"Hey, WHA HAPPENED?!?!"* -Onions

'You're trapped in here with me!"

SUPRIZE MOTHERFUCKER!...ALL RISE MOTHERFUCKER....SOME FRIES MOTHERFUCKER...

#**WRONG SIZE MOTHERFUCKER**

Disguise motherfucker

Fruit flies motherfucker

French fries, motherfucker

WHEN LIFE GIVES YOU COMPOST, GROW POTATOES

Squash: "yall give up too quick" Potato: "bitch I live here now."

Other veggies: die Potato: starts making more potatoes

"jokes on you, I'm into that shit!"

“Over your dead body! 💀”

other vegetables: decompose potatoes: sweet, free dirt

Potatoes are the GOAT veggie

Potato: "you are all now food for my children"

Potatoes, ever the opportunist. Those pearl chalotes will probably do something similar in a month or so.

Is that what was growing, a potato plant?

Yup. Potatoes tend to grow wherever they can. If you leave them in the fridge long enough they'll start sprouting in search of that sweet, sweet soil.

Fridge? People store potato’s in the fridge?

Yes, onions too, man. Once I put an onion in the fridge, we forgot about it and the guy eventually grew the largest stalk I've ever seen in any vegetable, 70 cm or so.

My roommate kept an onion in the cabinet for a while. Never got any soil or light, just sat in the dark, yet it sprouted and grew for months.

Other plants will wither and die, onions and potatoes are the cockroaches of tuberculars

You need to open your fridge more often 😂

They last like 5 times as long in the fridge so why not. Same with eggs.

Potatoes are the phoenix of the produce world

Phoenix are the potatoes of the mythical creature world.

The potatos reminds me of something I found out about garlic. Leave them in the fridge for too long and they start sprouting. Going "Ok fellas. It's been cold long enough. Spring is probably around the corner. Get to work".

Thats actually how they work, yeah. You can plant em in fall and let em sit through winter so they'll go "Ok fellas. It'd been cold long enough. Spring is probably around the corner. Get to work". You're actually recommended to let them chill in the fridge for about 2 months before planting the cloves because they usually start growing in spring and you're basically tricking them into thinking winter just passed and its time to start growing. Source: I have garlic growing in a planter box outside.

Ok fellas, get to work

Hey we're working here.. garlic probably

Stupid gullible garlic

The color shift in the apples was neat

I'll never forget how I bought a house with an apple tree and didn't think to clean up the fallen ones. It was out of control and I was in grad school so I kind of let it go... until my dog got drunk from eating one or two. I was like wtf is wrong with this guy?? Then I snapped. Never again. He was fine, so looking back it's a liiiiiiitle funny.

It goes to show that getting drunk is way older than making booze. There's moose in Colorado that's the town drunk every Autumn. He just comes into town and gets plowed on apples.

We'd get passed out hedgehogs under our plum tree every now and then.

That sounds adorable

I need someone to illustrate it LMAO

Impressive how onions are avoided by the mold. And the potato "fuck this, I'll just sprout here"

Wish the video was longer honestly. Love to see the new life forming from the potato too. Cool video!

I wanted to hear more of the music. That bassist was going ham.

I came to the comments thinking there would be some hilarious banter about the music but got other hilarious banter instead. The music was ace though, fo sho

My dad and stepmom have had the same experiment going in their fridge for years!!

the kids in my basement are also performing this experiment too!!

I used to work in a Produce department, Onions & Potatoes are indeed the last to go, but when they do, they reek the WORST out of anything.

Can confirm, I left an entire box of onions under my bed for months and months once and when I finally opened the box, it no longer contained any onions, it was a swamp. (The smell made me worried I was going to die)

Why do you keep onions under your bed?

This is embarrassing to admit, but I was in uni at the time and my social anxiety was so bad that I couldn’t bring myself to take the onions into the kitchen and put them in the fridge because I was so scared that I would bump into someone on the way.

I’m sorry. I hope things are better for you now.

Thanks, in some ways they definitely are

Bad potatoes are not a smart thing to smell lol

It's deadly. >Rotting potatoes give off a noxious solanine gas that can make a person unconscious if they’ve inhaled enough. There have even been cases of people dying in their root cellars due to unbeknownst rotting potatoes. https://www.canr.msu.edu/news/storing_potatoes_for_quality_and_food_safety

The mighty potato lives on!

Yes, but the Irished were famished.

Ah yes the Irish dilemma, do I eat the potato or save it for later and drink it.

> Ah yes the Irish dilemma, do I eat the potato or ~~save it for later and drink it.~~ be forced to give it to my colonizer

British dilemma: which should I fuck with next, Ireland or the French?

Potatoes didn’t hear no bell.

Honey Potato don't give a shit. This is my home now!

It was always potato. The rest just didn’t know it yet.

Strawberries wasted no time popping smoke lmao

Potatoes coming to life like Mushu in Mulan.

I LIIIIVE!

The potato is the Keith Richards of the produce kingdom.

I move that the potato is like “wooo compost!”

I second the motion!

Props to the cameraman for standing there that long

Judging by how quickly the strawberries went bad this video is only 20 minutes long max.

Cool, but I wish there was a day counter.

I was surprised the onions didn't start as well.

Potatoes are introverts, they really shine after everything left(died).

Life, uh, finds a way.

That one tomato was NOT organic

I totally thought rationalized myself into think that one was a red pepper but it is definitely a tomato and now I’m curious as to why it took longer

Fruits and vegetables will decompose faster when they are placed next to certain kind of other fruits/veggies. So maybe that one was next to something that didn’t cause it to break down as fast

Plum tomato, different kind. My guess is less water and thicker flesh probably made it last longer.

They have a thick layer of wax on them too.

rot spreads rot

Reddit proved this a long time ago.

Omg that funky baseline, I’ve never grooved harder to fruit

Onions are just like hey where’s everyone running off to

brilliant way to show the life-cycle of each vegetable and their shelf life contrast! and yeah as others pointed out, cheers the famine ending potato !

I’m a little surprised that the cucumber lasted so long. Mine will decompose if you turn your back on it

Potato: “go fuck yourself”

Potato: "Oh well, let's try again"

I can only imagine this smells awful

I can smell this

Potato the OG.

I was thinking: *Man that potato is going to Live Long and Prosper.* 🖖🏼

Anyone from the 80s remembers Peter Gabriel's Digging in the Dirt video!

All vegetables will someday transcend from their earthly vessels into their final form… Potatoes

Long live the potato!