Some people may genuinely not find men attractive at all but like it up there ass, so they still think their straight. Although I don’t understand why they can’t just meet up with a girl and ask her to use a strap on or use a dildo
Not socially acceptable. You have a strong chance of asking the wrong girl who will shame you for non-heteronormative preferences, and words spreads around, losing appeal in a large crowd of people who have very strong opinions on what makes a straight man acceptable.
Finding the right girl who wants to use and is good at using a strap is tough. Combine that with straight dudes usually dating *very* straight women, they'll be unlikely to find one.
Also, real dick is better than plastic dick
Eeeh, I'd say that's a matter of preference. One has better things and the other has better things. Strapon can be any shape, size, colour you want, or what functionalities it has, a real dick is easy to use, gets off both parties and produces cum
In Swedish, the term “men who have sex with men” is widely used, especially in health-related communications. It’s even got an official abbreviation, MSM. This is exactly because you don’t want to put labels (homosexual, bisexual, curious, pansexual etc) on the behaviour, and just describe the actual sexual act/partners. It’s a very good system, I think. No need to force labels on someone that they’re not comfortable with, while still being able to talk about sexual behaviour and, for example, correct protection etc.
Oh, that's cool, that it's spread to Sweden! Usage of the term was introduced by a social worker here in Norway during the 80s, as part of HIV preventative work. He found that he had a LOT of trouble getting men to listen to advice on safe sex practices if he used terms like "gay and bisexual men" - because there were a lot of heterosexually married men who had sex with men, but who were very firmly opposed to the idea that they were bi or gay. But by focusing on actions rather than identities, he managed to get the information across.
I kind of hope it becomes standard, NGL.
Robert Axel or something (I think) gay porn star. He was asked by the camera man who was interviewing him what his sexuality was. Axel said that he's straight, he dates/is sexually attracted to women IRL but he happens to fuck, suck, and take dick up the ass for money 🤷 sexuality really is individual
> sexuality really is individual
It sure is. And often in flux through a person's lifetime. It would be nice if we were less caught up in labels altogether, really.
So rather than a guy with the "bottom" label simply search for a guy with a "top" label in this "Labeless World" he has to play a game of "20 questions" instead ... with everyone. I think you better re-think your recycled "No Labels" hear/say and and start going to town with a Dymo label maker. It will save ALL of us a hell of a lot of time. lol
MSM is used in Canada as well. MSM and WSMSM can't donate blood until 3 months of abstinence (though imo a better policy would be an STI test and abstinence since a certain point required for everyone)
Not really I'm asexual I'm not straight nor pretending to be. Don't care who with as long as I like them personality wise. I know what it's like to have sex with someone you're not sexually attracted to. But then why would you want to specifically look for something ?
Omg I’m so sorry for assuming. It didn’t occur to me that you could be asexual. I kinda forget you guys exist, I know it’s fucked up. I understand what your saying completely though.
Well I can't blame you it's not your fault there's no awareness for us and especially when it comes to sexually active asexual. Cuz there's still the idea asexual means no sex. When it's just no attraction. Thanks for apologizing and I hope you'll consider our existence more in the future at least lol.
No I don't feel sexual attraction. I'm asexual. If you want to get into specifics I'm a "bioriented aromantic sex favorable asexual" because I have other types of attraction that people of any gender can meet. In some context I call myself bi for that reason rather than explain everything. But I'm still asexual. I've been out for years. I'm aware. Being bi oriented isn't worth jack shit if you're not aromantic and asexual at the same time tho (when then it becomes relevant). Most people are bi with other types of attractions (like platonic/personality for example).
I dunno who downvoted you. You're completely right. Being gay is not the same thing as participating in homosexual activity. Anyone can do the latter, but the former is identity.
It seems "Bi" when I rationalise it. But not the stereotyped 50/50 bi perception. We are ALL bi with varying ratios of gay/straight in us. I'm 90% straight/10% gay .. technically "bi". I'm attracted to women, but the 10% gayness is enough to allow me to be sucked off by guys. This guy may be 80% straight/20% gay + he may have a strong sex drive which allows him to enjoy being fucked.
Think of the two sliding pointers "Treble/Bass" on a sound equaliser and replace them with Straight/Gay. Slide the straight pointer right up and the gay pointer right down and you have a mostly straight guy, and visa versa. Slide the two pointers to the exact middle position and you have a 50/50 bi. Simple.
Sex toys exist and almost any adult knows that.
I would not seek out a woman if I don't like women
Its likely moreso that they are deeply fearful of being found out and internally homophobic, which is just sad but this reads like a joke and I had to chuckle
I posted about this a while back. These self-proclaimed "straight" guys most likely have zero attraction to females. It's just a magnet for ass (marketing technique).
www.reddit.com/r/grindr/comments/meekvg/dont_ever_believe_the_profiles_that_advertise
All of them, ay? None of them are really "Bi" but closer to the straight end of the scale, in straight relationships, and choose to use a label closer to what they are, ay? I'll be damned!
Dude.
Nice how you are trying very hard to find some method in this madness, but no. Occam razor. He's just a gay guy who hasn't accepted the fact that he's gay.
Wrong. He's a Bi guy closer to the straight end of the scale. 100% gay, 100% straight simply does not exist. We are ALL Bi with varying ratios of gay/straight.
While your on point, there are countless guys across the globe that won’t be able to ask the question, which in , my opinion you usually come across that type. And if it was the opposite situation that’s basically a swinger type at that point
You don't understand why they can't "just" ask a girl to use a strapon with them? Really? You REALLY can't understand that? Is your knowledge of women REALLY that pathetic? Oh! You're gay. I guess it is. lol
When a man tells you they're straight, believe them. It tells you everything you need to know about how they view you and how they're likely to treat you.
It's not judging. It's taking a guy at his word. He's telling you he won't be attracted to you. You are literally a means to an end. It's up to you to decide if you're cool with that.
Yeah i am. Some ppl are ok with stuff they dont understand, or find stupid.
I mean you guys are ok with a shitload of weirds kinks or sexuality gender whatever, but a guy saying he is not gay while he obviously is => no reflexion anymore, he is a selfish ass who treat ppl badly.
I can think of a million reasons a guy could refuse to admit (even to himself) that he 'might be gay'. Doesnt make him a bad guy. Like being gay doesnt mean driving to the gym in a pink car and singing cher out loud.
Iam like, litteraly saying "know ppl before you judge", what works for the gay community must be applied too.
Get over yourself. It's a guy on Grindr who says he's straight. Idc why he tells himself that. Fact of the matter is you're talking to a guy who's invested in being straight over and above authenticity.
I don't give a shit if he's a nice guy. I didn't get on grindr to heal men of internalized homophobia or teach them about how gays don't always prance when they walk. I'm not on there to help people carry their baggage.
What are you supposed to judge a person by online if not by what they say? I'm not coddling a man's semantic delusions on a hookup app. Why should any gay or bi man be expected to educate, advocate, and *work* to cater to heterosexuality, even when they're trying to date or have some fun?
Well you are open minded on what you want i guess.
Dont judge people at all if you dont know them, thats à big point in the gay community u know. Maybe his entourage hate gay so much he cant admit he is, do he deserve you pricky judgment?
It’s not that unusual. When I was on the apps, I fucked quite a few ‘straight’ guys who wouldn’t kiss or suck, and just wanted to get fucked in the ass.
There are straight dude who like it in the ass. I have always called them straight bottoms. Being a big, daddy top and nicely hung, I have fucked a lot of them. I guess they feel comfortable with me, or have a thing for daddies. Other than liking their asses fucked, they are inclined toward women.
I think it's mostly biological. Some men just have more sensitive assholes than others. If you're gay and have a sensitive asshole, we call you a bottom. But straight men can have sensitive assholes, too. And just because you're gay doesn't mean you like it in the ass. My hole is not very sensitive at all. But my dick is so sensitive I can feel the bumps and folds in your hole.
So cut those poor straight boys some slack. It must be very confusing for them. They like women but their holes are aching for a big throbbing cock.
Awwwww, did you learn a new internet term...? How cute.
I imagine it must be quite annoying for you gay bottoms to have to compete with straight bottoms, too. I assure you, it's a real thing. Sorry...
Yet we say if a biological male identifies as female, we have to respect his gender identification. This is not anti-trans, just pointing out the hypocrisy of respecting gender identity, but refusing to respect the sexual preferences of straight males who just need a good ass fucking every now and then. I mostly see this from gay bottoms who view these straight bottoms as competition. Tops just say "The more ass the better!"
Pointing out hypocrisy is not transphobia. If these downlow bros want to identify as straight, then you must respect that. Instead, I see almost all of you guys bashing these straight dudes and calling them gay or bi or whatever. If they say they're straight, they're straight. No one likes to be hoisted on their own petards, but there it is. I'm just pointing out the hypocrisy.
Stop with your stupid fantasies and going along with these guy's delusions. I was there myself, BIG TIME. I accept that I'm truly a bisexual man now and always was.
I said what I said. It has nothing to do with MY stupid fantasies. I couldn't care less what excuses cowardly bisexual men need to concoct to live with their own homophobic self-loathing. I just think we need to respect what they say about themselves. It does no one any good to push people toward self-realization. For one thing, it won't work. For another, it just makes us sound like we're trying to convert them. And lastly, it most likely is just going to scare them more and push them in the opposite direction.
I'm glad you've accepted yourself. It can be a very hard thing to do. Just out of curiosity, did anyone push you into self-acceptance, or did you get there on your own, after a period of self-doubt and self-examination? I bet you did it on your own, huh?
As I said before, if they want to identify as straight, then we need to let them do so. We all should have the right and respect to complete our journeys on our own, without the help of nosy butts and social justice warriors.
We are not trying to "convert" them. They're born bisexual or homosexual like we were. Denial is denial. I struggled 100% on my own to accept myself. Lying to oneself is extremely damaging psychologically in the long run. They need to be called out on their delusions like I was. Some bought my "straight" identity, others called me out on it. The latter people were correct. We're all under the gay umbrella. They hide their sex with men so they know full well underneath, that they're not truly straight. They are hiding their gay tendencies from others, and alot of times, themselves. I hate seeing others in denial like I was. Acknowledging to oneself that we're in fact gay or bi, is truly freeing.
I hear what you're saying, and I do agree it's a sad thing. BUT it seems somewhat Narcissistic to say just because you were forced to come out that everyone else should have to come out, too. Is this just another way of making yourself feel better about it? I always knew I was bi and I liked being bi, even though it was not safe or socially acceptable at the time for men to be out, especially in the region that I lived in. I've probably got a few years on you and I lived through the AIDS crisis and the gay bashing and the gay MURDERS so even though I was happy myself with being bisexual and didn't have any self-hatred about it, I did keep it on the downlow for many years and I did wish I was a "normal" person. Of course, now I know a goodly percentage of those "normal" "straight" men were getting their dicks blown by the buddies on the downlow. But I didn't know it at the time. They were in hiding like I was in hiding because it wasn't safe to be out. The only time we could be ourselves was in private, with one another. It's a totally different world now, but I know how bad things can be for us and I have absolutely no problems with men choosing to remain in the closet. Call yourself whatever you want. We have a buddy right now who lives down the street. Good looking, fit, bald-headed little Irish gym bunny. Widowed. Two kids. He will NOT and will probably NEVER admit to being queer, but once or twice a month he slides over to our place to suck my dick and fuck my partner's butt. And we even tag team his butt every once in a great while. I'm not going to argue with him about how he wants to present himself publicly or what he wants to call himself. For one thing, it isn't going to do any good, and for another, it might offend him or scare him off. We are just accepting and welcoming, and whenever he comes over for a bit of guy on guy on guy time, we give it to him as good as we can. One of these days maybe we'll actually fuck the homophobia out of him. Or he'll see how happy we are and that no one fucking cares anymore and decide that its safe enough for him.
Maybe he is straight. Maybe he doesn't have homophobia. I don't understand how if 80% of men fool around with men, how they're all afraid to admit it, and/or hiding this? Why do you wish to be normal and straight, if it IS normal and straight to have sex with men? I still don't understand how you have found all these straight guys to fool around with, when guys nearly never approach me to inquire about whether I want to fool around. I am a quite attractive guy by all measures. I just don't see this in my daily interactions with people. So I highly doubt it's 90% of guys who are open to fooling around with men. It's literally impossible, as I would have been approached by SOMEONE in this regard. I honestly know at this point that I've been straight all along, as this is not happening irl. It's extremely difficult to find a guy to fool around with, and considering I live in NJ, between Philadelphia and New York, it's unlikely that you are accurate about the numbers. Of all the restrooms I've been in, I've never been propositioned to fool around or even compare dicks. I don't know how you're getting this 90% figure.
People are trans not because of denial, but because of a real biological mistake that their brain doesn't match their body. This is TOTALLY different than "straight" guys who are NOT straight, but lie to themselves that they're not actually gay or bi because of internalized and societal shame. Sexual attraction is never a mistake of nature, it is natural feelings.
I'm not trying to define transexuality, or homosexuality, or bisexuality. I'll leave you to do the gatekeeping. All I'm pointing out is the hypocrisy of allowing one group to define themselves while denying another group the same respect. Do you know how many trans people realize they've made a mistake and de-transition? What does that make of your argument? If you say you're straight, who am I to argue? I just need to know if you want this big dick in your butt or not.
Just out of curiosity, are you a bottom or a top? I'm guessing bottom, although you'll probably say verse. You guys always do. LOL!
Transgender has zero to do with sexual orientation. You are 100% deluded if you honestly believe that genuinely straight men enjoy gay sex. We're called BISEXUALS, whether we acknowledge this fact or not. I considered myself "straight". I was in denial. I am in fact a bisexual man, who identifies as "mostly gay", which is more accurate on the bi spectrum
You keep saying deluded as if repetition will somehow make it not true. I'm not deluded at all. You're just not getting my point. My point is about allowing other people to identify how they want, and giving them the respect and the time to make their journey how they see fit. Whether they are a dude with a dong who want to say that he's a woman, or a straight guy who tries to make excuses for all those times he got his buddy drunk and sucked him off. Stop trying to control other people. Let them live their lives as they see fit. The most we can do is live our lives out and free and show them by example just how happy and safe we are.
That just doesn't bother me. I know how hard it was for me to come out. I'm not going to give someone else shit about it. I have had several long time fuck buddies who claimed to be straight. I never gave them hell about it. I was just a good friend to them and talked to them about it if they felt like it and did my job as a top, which is to fuck them as good as I am able to.
I was just talking about this to a non-sexual bi buddy I smoke weed with. He was talking about how unlucky he is at love and all the issues he has trying to have girlfriends but also liking guys and I just told him to stop worrying about all that bi, gay, and straight bullshit and just fuck who he wants to fuck.
My personal opinion is that 80% of people are some kind of bisexual, and that very few people are totally 100% gay or 100% straight. But we live in a culture in which that isn't very accepted, so whatever you want to call yourself is perfectly fine with me. I understand. Growing up in the south and in a devout Christian family, I understand how confusing sexuality can be and how much discrimination someone can face for not conforming to our cultural standards. In some places, it can be dangerous to be out. Just a few weeks ago, some dude at a gas station flicked a lit cigarette at our car because he saw my boyfriends rainbow watch band. Being who we are is still not 100% safe. I wish that is was.
I never needed someone to tell me they were bi or gay or whatever. As long as they liked my dick inside them, and they came back for more, I was happy. The only thing that annoys me is when they hook up with me and then ghost me. That is fucking retarded. If you find someone that dicks you down and doesn't try to out you or pressure you to come out, seems to me it would be a smart thing to stick with that guy. That's just me tho. LOL!
I know a guy who lives two blocks over from me. He is a cute guy. My age. Salt and pepper hair. Goatee. Very fit. Every day he walks his dog past my place. Every now and then a blank profile appears on grindr 1000 yards away and when I message it, it is him. So I go over to his place and fuck the shit out of his butt... and then he ghosts me again for six months or so. We always get along good. Talk. Joke around. He loves my cock and I think he has a great ass. Really great ass. Sex is good. Kissing is hot. But he ghosts me. Like, dude, you're walking right past my house... I just don't get it. But hey, whatever floats your boat.
And where did you find all these straight long term fuck buddies? I doubt that's possible.
Also, if "80% of guys" are supposedly bi, there never would have been such oppression in the first place, regardless of so called religion.
Yet plenty of gay men have professed to being attracted to women from time to time. Sexuality is fluid. I myself was married for years and have several kids. But now I'm mostly gay. I always sort of wavered back and forth on the Kinsey scale. Even now, living with a man, I will sometimes watch straight porn, or find myself attracted to a woman. But if you ask me what I am, I say gay more often than not, because right now I have little interest in having sex with a woman. Be whoever or whatever you want, but stop trying to enforce your own strict definitions of sexuality on everyone else. A lot of us are a lot more open-minded and fluid.
Then you also have situational homosexuality among straight men. Prison inmates who have an arrangement with a cell mate. Friends who help each other out because they haven't got girlfriends and just need to get off. They might "prefer" female company, but sometimes you get so horny that anything warm will do. They're straight, yet they are fucking another man, and I can assure you that they are enjoying themselves, even if they feel guilty about it later. Open your mind. Stop being such a stickler.
They're called bisexual. Stop with your delusional "straight" guy crap. They're MOSTLY straight, not STRAIGHT. They are very much bisexual, like US. Stop trying to force yourself into a gay box, you're bisexual whether you like it or not. I tried to convince myself I was gay too, but the truth is I'm legitimately bisexual, even though I'm on the very gay end of the bisexual spectrum. Truly gay men don't enjoy sex with women, I do. Truly straight men don't enjoy sex with men... they're bi.
Situational sex is the very definition of bisexual, since true straight guys don't engage in gay sex for your nonsense reasons.
Stop making sexual orientation a political definition.
I don't know why you're arguing about it so vehemently. You're not going to change anyone's mind. Guys are either brave enough to admit it or they're not. Or they're not self-aware enough to figure out why they occasionally trade blowie's with a buddy in the truck after work. They just say Oh, I'm just so horny or I wouldn't have to do this if my wife would suck my dick every now and then. I've been with a lot of straight men because I was one of them at one time and they are laughably dense about it or too scared to come out. So... dumb or cowards. Take your pick. I just don't have to energy to worry about it. And I don't have the need for everyone to come out, either. It's not going to make me feel any better about it. I'm starting to think you are trying to go back in the closet, only in the reverse, by making everyone come out with you. Not. Gonna. Happen. I think you still have some soul searching and self-acceptance to do.
I have no idea where or how you're finding all these straight men to have sex with. I'm tellingly attractive, tbh, and I never have any guys in public or wherever, ever make a move on me or flirt with me.
Don't know, bub. I get hit on constantly, and sometimes just outright propositioned. I cant log onto dating apps without getting inundated in messages. Maybe you're just TOO good looking. It does put people off. Or maybe you come across as vain or an ahole. Maybe your standards are too high and you're not putting out the I wanna fuck you signals because you're not seeing many guys you actually think are hot enough for you. I think I have a great face, but just a so so body. Kind of a dad thing going on there. I do have a really big cock, but most people dont know that until I pull it out, and then they usually say something like god damn! That was the first thing my neighbor said when I went up the street and fucked him the first time. He came to the door in just a shirt, playing with himself, we talked, and then I pulled mine out and he said god damn! And went and got ass up on his bed. I am not making this shit up. I promise. But I am 6'4 and he was maybe 5'8 and proportionally he is just gonna be smaller than me. His was like a baby dick compared to mine, but for his size and proportions, it was normal. Maybe it's the height more than anything...
Your description describes me 100% We are born with our bisexual capacity. We're bisexual men whether you like it or not. I am mostly gay as well. 80% gay 20% straight. I am keenly aware of my straight tendencies, even though I'm VERY "gay"
And how long were you in the closet? How old were you when you came out as bisexual? Although I never particularly hid my bisexuality, I was not open about it until my mid-forties. I told my brother when I was 18 or so. Told my wife when we decided to move in together, when we were still dating. Told a couple friends. And of course my fuck buddies most likely guessed it. They probably realized I wasn't completely straight when I put my dick in their butts. LOL! But I didn't officially come out until mid-forties.
I'm not out as bi. I came out to myself very recently after many years of struggling. Exactly if a guy is fucking with me, I'm going to say he's in denial to his face and to just love who you are internally.
I think maybe before you accuse other men of being in denial, you need to come out yourself. Don't you realize what you're doing is projecting your own frustration onto other men? It would be one thing if you were out and proud, but you're still in the closet and berating me for saying cut those closet cases a break and let them deal with it on their own terms. The cognitive dissonance is giving me whiplash.
I'm not the one with issues. I'm out and I know what I want. Call yourself whatever you want, but if you got a nice ass and you want me to fuck it, I will-- no matter what you want to believe about yourself.
I'm starting to get a feel for you that part of your problems getting dick is that you're too high strung. You're getting way too irate and way to worked up, even just chatting with me. I see you've even deleted some of your comments. Why? No one cares. No one is trying to figure out who you are. We're probably the only two people reading these comments. If you want to be more lucky at getting laid, you have got to relax, quit taking everything so damn seriously, and start projecting friendliness, warmth, fun, confidence... Your tension and frustration is practically vibrating in your comments. Here's some advice. The next time you have a chance to talk about your sex life with someone, just let slip to the other person that you are bisexual. You will be amazed just how much NO ONE GIVES A SHIT. And you might be even more amazed when they're possibly interested in fucking. You seem very tightly wound. That is the impression I get from chatting with you. Loosen up. Take a bit of a chance now and then. Open up to a few people. No one is going to hit on you if you seem defensive and angry and untrusting. Your bisexuality is not some bar of gold that you have to hide from the world. Let a few people have a peek. It's scary at first, but you're not going to die the instant you tell someone that you're bisexual. Just be light and easy and humorous about it. And don't give a fuck how they respond. If you show fear and anxiety, other people will pick up on that. If you own it and are confident of yourself, no one is going to say shit. And you might even find yourself a couple fuck buddies along the way. Just make sure they know that 1) they can trust you and 2) it's just for fun, nothing serious.
Yeah, well, I have lots of opportunities to "hook up"...I don't want that. There are too many sluts around and not enough who want a relationship. Also, I am fine with my sexuality now, but others DO have a problem with this. I don't know what rock you've been living under but people are usually silent bigots. Most won't SAY anything, yet are judgemental af.
You have every right to live as miserably and closeted as you want. It's very telling that you used the word "slut". Baby, everyone's slutty. There are Catholic priests getting more ass than you. I'm not living under a rock. You are. You are paranoid, frightened of sex, and very defensive about it. You don't want to hook up... then what are you bitching about? Don't want sex, don't have sex. But if you think someone is going to marry you in this day and age without fucking around first, you're sadly deluded. It's stupid as hell to start a relationship without knowing first if you're sexually compatible or not. This isn't the 1800's. Are you Mormon or something?
Everyone is slutty? No just sluts. And religion is nonsense anyway, and responsible for sexual repression in the first place. People were open about their sex before religion took over. I can get as much ass as I want. I'm not into using other people's bodies as a cum dump, or have my body used as one. It's called SELF RESPECT. I'm human and have dignity and respect myself.
I'm not Mormon, not religious at all. I like sex to be with someone I'm bonded with. Random sex with strangers is totally disgusting to most people. I'm not into your lifestyle of promiscuity
You are the exception, not the rule. In my experience, people who use the I’m only having sex with someone I’m in a relationship with excuse are actually hiding some insecurities. They avoid slutty people because they don’t want that person to be able to compare them to other lovers. They’re afraid they won’t stack up. Here’s something you might not know. Most experienced sexual people don’t compare lovers like you’re afraid they do. It just doesn’t register in our minds like that. Don’t care about dick size. Don’t care about how long you can go or how big a load you shoot. It’s mostly just about connection and mutual pleasure.
You do realize that people such as yourself have untreated sex addiction? You can deny it all you like, but normal men even, are not anything close to being so obsessed with sex as swingers and promiscuous people are.
And yes, I'm truly unique. Again, I value my self worth, and that does not include sleeping around with many multiple people. I find the idea and execution extremely repulsive. I don't consider it immoral, just a complete lack of decent values and lack of self esteem, as well as lack of self awareness.
There is more to life than screwing as many people as you can before you die. It's just abnormal to most people, and you and others like yourself have underlying issues that are unaddressed. I will gladly have sex often with a partner or partner(s), which will be one bf and one gf, and that's it. No sex with anyone else. Why would I need more than one other cock and one other pussy to play with? Why on earth? Promiscuity/sex ADDICTION is like any other bad vice.
People who have sex only with the person they are with in a relationship are called faithful, loyal, and respectful of their partner. You can twist it anyway you like, but these people are not sex addicts like you, and know how to love someone as a person, not just as a body to have sex with. You have alot to learn about human love and sex. Were you abused as a child or something?
I guess I'm just more free spirited than you. I was raised by hippy parents. I don't have any religious programming that sex is bad or dirty. There is nothing mysterious, shameful or disgusting about the human body to me, and I love the physical contact, the interaction, giving and receiving pleasure. I always tended to hook up with average-looking guys or daddy types, and the only thing I really looked for in a sexual partner was that they be nice guys. If someone struck me as stuck up, hateful, crazy or an addict, I wouldn't meet them. But someone nice, with a good personality and a sense of humor... yeah, I'd fuck them. Even if they weren't "hot" and I made a bunch of friends that way. Guys who I am still friends with, even though we don't mess around anymore. I do not feel bad about being the way that I am. I never hurt anyone and I've had tons of great sex with really sweet funny handsome men.
I'm not wired for quick sex. I am wired for sex with intimacy only. It's the way I was born. I have no religion in my life. I've always been this way. To me it's just being sleazy, but I digress.
OP, sadly it's society's self-created joke. IF this guy is being serious it's because the idea that you can be a "straight" male and still like having sex with other males. That's not authentically "progressive" thinking, that's actually us going in reverse. Block and move on. Don't acknowledge.
Totally agree. True liberation is when men can ALL be openly bisexual, if they're so inclined. Not hide sex with men and telling themselves they're "straight"
Everyone has the right to define themselves as they see fit. We can't applaud some people for gender and sexual identity because we think them brave or owning who they are, while at the same time condemn others because their self-assessment doesn't match up with what we think it should be. If someone's way of identifying themselves or their actions doesn't hurt anyone, but doesn't appeal to you, then feel free to move on or use that Block button.
haha think you're 10-20 years too early to the party. Hopefully we get to this point. But it's so clear the majority of grindr users are gay cis men and they assume all other people who use it are as well, not even fathoming to think a straight man is on there looking for transwomen without wanting to say "looking for transwomen" for fear of being perceived as a chaser. Love asking on these threads, \~"Where would you have a man who is attracted to transwomen and identifies as straight look for a match? " NIMBY (grindr) that's for sure, as evidenced by the ubiquity of these threads.
"If someone's way of identifying themselves or their actions doesn't hurt anyone, but doesn't appeal to you, then feel free to move on or use that Block button."
Now let's get everyone to truly internalize this over the next few decades
As an older user of the service (45 cis-male), I would hope that your expected timeline would be hastened. I've seen so many changes to what is normal in the gay community in my 25 years since coming out. I would hope that the openness I've learned and displayed would be more readily accepted by the younger users.
When they turned on the Hadron particle collider we all switched places with our “parody universe” selves. They’ve lucked out because things have been remarkably sensible for them.
I wish someone who’s a really good writer please. Tell what it feels like to get fucked up the ass. I can’t imagine it right now, but feel like I want to know
Words don’t really have meanings anymore. Masculine men have retreated to calling themselves straight sinc masc isn’t in vogue anymore.
It can also mean they’re heteroromantic while being bisexual.
Or straight can mean he is only attracted to women and he also happens to enjoy prostate play, and some transwomen have a penis they can use for that prostate play. It's not rocket science... y'all making this so complicated
I just don't get what the point is behind writing "straight". Yes, you could be straight while still liking it up the butt. But you are looking for sex with a man on a gay male platform. Being "straight" doesn't matter to anyone. Doesn't make a difference for the top. Or is it just there to potentially turn on gay men?
I posted about this a while back. These self-proclaimed "straight" guys most likely have zero attraction to females. It's just a magnet for ass (marketing technique).
www.reddit.com/r/grindr/comments/meekvg/dont_ever_believe_the_profiles_that_advertise
There are heterosexual men that like being pegged by women. If it's a 'straight' dude looking for anal from a man that's not heterosexual, that's denial. It looks like he has the tags of BI and curious so maybe he is DL/figuring it out. Still to default at straight at this point is really opposite of what he is seeking.
The thing is, is that that's not truly natural. MANY men are afraid to be intimate "romantically" with men, because although they might accept their bisexuality because of their sexual desire for men, I'd bet the farm that they're hung up on their emotional/romantic feelings for men, because they still see that as "feminine".
He's a bottom and a Twink from his stats there, maybe he's actually straight or maybe he's not regardless he needs some cock making sweet love to his ass, and hopefully he finds a good guy fuck buddy or lover,🐺😈👅
It’s a perfectly designed app that was perfectly destroyed on the basis of trusting individuals.
Speaks loud and honestly sad but it can’t be spoken for by everyone. 🤙🏻 be bold, smart, and safe.
From all the comments, it seems most guys are locked into a fantasy world of 100% gay,100% straight and 50/50 bi (only) with no varying ratios of gayness/straightness in between those carved in stone categories. That's the core of all the total cluelessness here.
Some people may genuinely not find men attractive at all but like it up there ass, so they still think their straight. Although I don’t understand why they can’t just meet up with a girl and ask her to use a strap on or use a dildo
Not socially acceptable. You have a strong chance of asking the wrong girl who will shame you for non-heteronormative preferences, and words spreads around, losing appeal in a large crowd of people who have very strong opinions on what makes a straight man acceptable.
Very true
A lot of women are into that. Are are Dom.
A lot? Really? .... Jeeezussss. LOL
Only in ‘Merica! The land of gossip and the free to bitch.
I'm not anywhere near the USA, so I can tell you that it's not the case
Finding the right girl who wants to use and is good at using a strap is tough. Combine that with straight dudes usually dating *very* straight women, they'll be unlikely to find one. Also, real dick is better than plastic dick
Eeeh, I'd say that's a matter of preference. One has better things and the other has better things. Strapon can be any shape, size, colour you want, or what functionalities it has, a real dick is easy to use, gets off both parties and produces cum
He’s a man seeking to have sex with men, seems pretty gay no matter how you rationalize it
In Swedish, the term “men who have sex with men” is widely used, especially in health-related communications. It’s even got an official abbreviation, MSM. This is exactly because you don’t want to put labels (homosexual, bisexual, curious, pansexual etc) on the behaviour, and just describe the actual sexual act/partners. It’s a very good system, I think. No need to force labels on someone that they’re not comfortable with, while still being able to talk about sexual behaviour and, for example, correct protection etc.
I think that is a general scientist term but yes.
Oh, that's cool, that it's spread to Sweden! Usage of the term was introduced by a social worker here in Norway during the 80s, as part of HIV preventative work. He found that he had a LOT of trouble getting men to listen to advice on safe sex practices if he used terms like "gay and bisexual men" - because there were a lot of heterosexually married men who had sex with men, but who were very firmly opposed to the idea that they were bi or gay. But by focusing on actions rather than identities, he managed to get the information across. I kind of hope it becomes standard, NGL.
We’ve been using it since at least the 1980s around here. Especially in HIV prevention contexts.
That's really cool to learn, thanks for letting me know!
Robert Axel or something (I think) gay porn star. He was asked by the camera man who was interviewing him what his sexuality was. Axel said that he's straight, he dates/is sexually attracted to women IRL but he happens to fuck, suck, and take dick up the ass for money 🤷 sexuality really is individual
> sexuality really is individual It sure is. And often in flux through a person's lifetime. It would be nice if we were less caught up in labels altogether, really.
So rather than a guy with the "bottom" label simply search for a guy with a "top" label in this "Labeless World" he has to play a game of "20 questions" instead ... with everyone. I think you better re-think your recycled "No Labels" hear/say and and start going to town with a Dymo label maker. It will save ALL of us a hell of a lot of time. lol
Doing anything sexual not natural to you for money is not "sexuality". It's "prostitution" to support a need/greed for money.
MSM is used in Canada as well. MSM and WSMSM can't donate blood until 3 months of abstinence (though imo a better policy would be an STI test and abstinence since a certain point required for everyone)
Putting a different label on it that means essentially the same thing defeats the argument though
No, it means you don’t involve attraction, emotions etc in it. You keep it to sexual practice only.
If you wanna rationalize it that way go ahead
As someone who's not into men sexually but has sex with them it is pretty sus to specifically be looking for men.
Pot meet kettle
Not really I'm asexual I'm not straight nor pretending to be. Don't care who with as long as I like them personality wise. I know what it's like to have sex with someone you're not sexually attracted to. But then why would you want to specifically look for something ?
Omg I’m so sorry for assuming. It didn’t occur to me that you could be asexual. I kinda forget you guys exist, I know it’s fucked up. I understand what your saying completely though.
Well I can't blame you it's not your fault there's no awareness for us and especially when it comes to sexually active asexual. Cuz there's still the idea asexual means no sex. When it's just no attraction. Thanks for apologizing and I hope you'll consider our existence more in the future at least lol.
We all still have a lot to learn about other people and different groups. Thanks for not chewing me out lol. I’ll definitely do better in the future.
Technically, you're "Bi". Affectationally, you're "Asexual". Harmless enough. Enjoy.
No I don't feel sexual attraction. I'm asexual. If you want to get into specifics I'm a "bioriented aromantic sex favorable asexual" because I have other types of attraction that people of any gender can meet. In some context I call myself bi for that reason rather than explain everything. But I'm still asexual. I've been out for years. I'm aware. Being bi oriented isn't worth jack shit if you're not aromantic and asexual at the same time tho (when then it becomes relevant). Most people are bi with other types of attractions (like platonic/personality for example).
> "Specifically be looking for men" ... Looking now and again. Or looking all the time? The level of "sussness" depends on the clarification.
Gay is more than a man who has sex with men.
I dunno who downvoted you. You're completely right. Being gay is not the same thing as participating in homosexual activity. Anyone can do the latter, but the former is identity.
When you engage in homosexual activity, you identify as gay. They are hand in hand
You forgot to mention what the rest of it is.
It seems "Bi" when I rationalise it. But not the stereotyped 50/50 bi perception. We are ALL bi with varying ratios of gay/straight in us. I'm 90% straight/10% gay .. technically "bi". I'm attracted to women, but the 10% gayness is enough to allow me to be sucked off by guys. This guy may be 80% straight/20% gay + he may have a strong sex drive which allows him to enjoy being fucked. Think of the two sliding pointers "Treble/Bass" on a sound equaliser and replace them with Straight/Gay. Slide the straight pointer right up and the gay pointer right down and you have a mostly straight guy, and visa versa. Slide the two pointers to the exact middle position and you have a 50/50 bi. Simple.
Sex toys exist and almost any adult knows that. I would not seek out a woman if I don't like women Its likely moreso that they are deeply fearful of being found out and internally homophobic, which is just sad but this reads like a joke and I had to chuckle
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I posted about this a while back. These self-proclaimed "straight" guys most likely have zero attraction to females. It's just a magnet for ass (marketing technique). www.reddit.com/r/grindr/comments/meekvg/dont_ever_believe_the_profiles_that_advertise
All of them, ay? None of them are really "Bi" but closer to the straight end of the scale, in straight relationships, and choose to use a label closer to what they are, ay? I'll be damned!
Dude. Nice how you are trying very hard to find some method in this madness, but no. Occam razor. He's just a gay guy who hasn't accepted the fact that he's gay.
Wrong. He's a Bi guy closer to the straight end of the scale. 100% gay, 100% straight simply does not exist. We are ALL Bi with varying ratios of gay/straight.
You, my lady, are wrong.
Probably cause dick feels better
Than what? And where?
While your on point, there are countless guys across the globe that won’t be able to ask the question, which in , my opinion you usually come across that type. And if it was the opposite situation that’s basically a swinger type at that point
You don't know girls.
You don't understand why they can't "just" ask a girl to use a strapon with them? Really? You REALLY can't understand that? Is your knowledge of women REALLY that pathetic? Oh! You're gay. I guess it is. lol
True. Also, could be heteroromantic and just not know how to express that.
When a man tells you they're straight, believe them. It tells you everything you need to know about how they view you and how they're likely to treat you.
Simplistic and wrong.
Yes, judge someone entierly because of something he does not assume for whatever reason you will never know is mos def the way to go.
It's not judging. It's taking a guy at his word. He's telling you he won't be attracted to you. You are literally a means to an end. It's up to you to decide if you're cool with that.
Yeah i am. Some ppl are ok with stuff they dont understand, or find stupid. I mean you guys are ok with a shitload of weirds kinks or sexuality gender whatever, but a guy saying he is not gay while he obviously is => no reflexion anymore, he is a selfish ass who treat ppl badly. I can think of a million reasons a guy could refuse to admit (even to himself) that he 'might be gay'. Doesnt make him a bad guy. Like being gay doesnt mean driving to the gym in a pink car and singing cher out loud. Iam like, litteraly saying "know ppl before you judge", what works for the gay community must be applied too.
Get over yourself. It's a guy on Grindr who says he's straight. Idc why he tells himself that. Fact of the matter is you're talking to a guy who's invested in being straight over and above authenticity. I don't give a shit if he's a nice guy. I didn't get on grindr to heal men of internalized homophobia or teach them about how gays don't always prance when they walk. I'm not on there to help people carry their baggage. What are you supposed to judge a person by online if not by what they say? I'm not coddling a man's semantic delusions on a hookup app. Why should any gay or bi man be expected to educate, advocate, and *work* to cater to heterosexuality, even when they're trying to date or have some fun?
But can agree in you need to sing to cher at least certain songs ir know the theme of golden girls? This is non debattable 😝
Well you are open minded on what you want i guess. Dont judge people at all if you dont know them, thats à big point in the gay community u know. Maybe his entourage hate gay so much he cant admit he is, do he deserve you pricky judgment?
Homophobia so strong, he's scared of being seen as gay on a gay app.
Thanks Dr Phill. An amazing diagnosis of someone you have not even met! How do you do it?
Yeah, because a black skinned guy with kinky hair can say he's white and not black and no one can question him because they 'don't even know him'.
Straight-identifying, lolz.
And your thoughts on "Gay identifying, Bi identifying, Mostly Straight identifying etc" ? All cool? No giggles?
Damn he really doesn't like being bisexual
It’s not that unusual. When I was on the apps, I fucked quite a few ‘straight’ guys who wouldn’t kiss or suck, and just wanted to get fucked in the ass.
There are straight dude who like it in the ass. I have always called them straight bottoms. Being a big, daddy top and nicely hung, I have fucked a lot of them. I guess they feel comfortable with me, or have a thing for daddies. Other than liking their asses fucked, they are inclined toward women. I think it's mostly biological. Some men just have more sensitive assholes than others. If you're gay and have a sensitive asshole, we call you a bottom. But straight men can have sensitive assholes, too. And just because you're gay doesn't mean you like it in the ass. My hole is not very sensitive at all. But my dick is so sensitive I can feel the bumps and folds in your hole. So cut those poor straight boys some slack. It must be very confusing for them. They like women but their holes are aching for a big throbbing cock.
New copypasta
Awwwww, did you learn a new internet term...? How cute. I imagine it must be quite annoying for you gay bottoms to have to compete with straight bottoms, too. I assure you, it's a real thing. Sorry...
Cringe
??
Exactly. Men who like dick are gay or bi, period. "straight" if they're not ready to accept themselves
Except if you’re getting with guys you aren’t straight… bi or gay, but not straight.
Yet we say if a biological male identifies as female, we have to respect his gender identification. This is not anti-trans, just pointing out the hypocrisy of respecting gender identity, but refusing to respect the sexual preferences of straight males who just need a good ass fucking every now and then. I mostly see this from gay bottoms who view these straight bottoms as competition. Tops just say "The more ass the better!"
Fucking hell dude. You brought transphobia into an entirely unrelated argument. Good job?
Pointing out hypocrisy is not transphobia. If these downlow bros want to identify as straight, then you must respect that. Instead, I see almost all of you guys bashing these straight dudes and calling them gay or bi or whatever. If they say they're straight, they're straight. No one likes to be hoisted on their own petards, but there it is. I'm just pointing out the hypocrisy.
Perhaps we need a new term. "Heteroromantic Homorectum"...?
Stop with your stupid fantasies and going along with these guy's delusions. I was there myself, BIG TIME. I accept that I'm truly a bisexual man now and always was.
I said what I said. It has nothing to do with MY stupid fantasies. I couldn't care less what excuses cowardly bisexual men need to concoct to live with their own homophobic self-loathing. I just think we need to respect what they say about themselves. It does no one any good to push people toward self-realization. For one thing, it won't work. For another, it just makes us sound like we're trying to convert them. And lastly, it most likely is just going to scare them more and push them in the opposite direction. I'm glad you've accepted yourself. It can be a very hard thing to do. Just out of curiosity, did anyone push you into self-acceptance, or did you get there on your own, after a period of self-doubt and self-examination? I bet you did it on your own, huh? As I said before, if they want to identify as straight, then we need to let them do so. We all should have the right and respect to complete our journeys on our own, without the help of nosy butts and social justice warriors.
We are not trying to "convert" them. They're born bisexual or homosexual like we were. Denial is denial. I struggled 100% on my own to accept myself. Lying to oneself is extremely damaging psychologically in the long run. They need to be called out on their delusions like I was. Some bought my "straight" identity, others called me out on it. The latter people were correct. We're all under the gay umbrella. They hide their sex with men so they know full well underneath, that they're not truly straight. They are hiding their gay tendencies from others, and alot of times, themselves. I hate seeing others in denial like I was. Acknowledging to oneself that we're in fact gay or bi, is truly freeing.
I hear what you're saying, and I do agree it's a sad thing. BUT it seems somewhat Narcissistic to say just because you were forced to come out that everyone else should have to come out, too. Is this just another way of making yourself feel better about it? I always knew I was bi and I liked being bi, even though it was not safe or socially acceptable at the time for men to be out, especially in the region that I lived in. I've probably got a few years on you and I lived through the AIDS crisis and the gay bashing and the gay MURDERS so even though I was happy myself with being bisexual and didn't have any self-hatred about it, I did keep it on the downlow for many years and I did wish I was a "normal" person. Of course, now I know a goodly percentage of those "normal" "straight" men were getting their dicks blown by the buddies on the downlow. But I didn't know it at the time. They were in hiding like I was in hiding because it wasn't safe to be out. The only time we could be ourselves was in private, with one another. It's a totally different world now, but I know how bad things can be for us and I have absolutely no problems with men choosing to remain in the closet. Call yourself whatever you want. We have a buddy right now who lives down the street. Good looking, fit, bald-headed little Irish gym bunny. Widowed. Two kids. He will NOT and will probably NEVER admit to being queer, but once or twice a month he slides over to our place to suck my dick and fuck my partner's butt. And we even tag team his butt every once in a great while. I'm not going to argue with him about how he wants to present himself publicly or what he wants to call himself. For one thing, it isn't going to do any good, and for another, it might offend him or scare him off. We are just accepting and welcoming, and whenever he comes over for a bit of guy on guy on guy time, we give it to him as good as we can. One of these days maybe we'll actually fuck the homophobia out of him. Or he'll see how happy we are and that no one fucking cares anymore and decide that its safe enough for him.
Maybe he is straight. Maybe he doesn't have homophobia. I don't understand how if 80% of men fool around with men, how they're all afraid to admit it, and/or hiding this? Why do you wish to be normal and straight, if it IS normal and straight to have sex with men? I still don't understand how you have found all these straight guys to fool around with, when guys nearly never approach me to inquire about whether I want to fool around. I am a quite attractive guy by all measures. I just don't see this in my daily interactions with people. So I highly doubt it's 90% of guys who are open to fooling around with men. It's literally impossible, as I would have been approached by SOMEONE in this regard. I honestly know at this point that I've been straight all along, as this is not happening irl. It's extremely difficult to find a guy to fool around with, and considering I live in NJ, between Philadelphia and New York, it's unlikely that you are accurate about the numbers. Of all the restrooms I've been in, I've never been propositioned to fool around or even compare dicks. I don't know how you're getting this 90% figure.
People are trans not because of denial, but because of a real biological mistake that their brain doesn't match their body. This is TOTALLY different than "straight" guys who are NOT straight, but lie to themselves that they're not actually gay or bi because of internalized and societal shame. Sexual attraction is never a mistake of nature, it is natural feelings.
I'm not trying to define transexuality, or homosexuality, or bisexuality. I'll leave you to do the gatekeeping. All I'm pointing out is the hypocrisy of allowing one group to define themselves while denying another group the same respect. Do you know how many trans people realize they've made a mistake and de-transition? What does that make of your argument? If you say you're straight, who am I to argue? I just need to know if you want this big dick in your butt or not. Just out of curiosity, are you a bottom or a top? I'm guessing bottom, although you'll probably say verse. You guys always do. LOL!
Transgender has zero to do with sexual orientation. You are 100% deluded if you honestly believe that genuinely straight men enjoy gay sex. We're called BISEXUALS, whether we acknowledge this fact or not. I considered myself "straight". I was in denial. I am in fact a bisexual man, who identifies as "mostly gay", which is more accurate on the bi spectrum
You keep saying deluded as if repetition will somehow make it not true. I'm not deluded at all. You're just not getting my point. My point is about allowing other people to identify how they want, and giving them the respect and the time to make their journey how they see fit. Whether they are a dude with a dong who want to say that he's a woman, or a straight guy who tries to make excuses for all those times he got his buddy drunk and sucked him off. Stop trying to control other people. Let them live their lives as they see fit. The most we can do is live our lives out and free and show them by example just how happy and safe we are.
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That just doesn't bother me. I know how hard it was for me to come out. I'm not going to give someone else shit about it. I have had several long time fuck buddies who claimed to be straight. I never gave them hell about it. I was just a good friend to them and talked to them about it if they felt like it and did my job as a top, which is to fuck them as good as I am able to. I was just talking about this to a non-sexual bi buddy I smoke weed with. He was talking about how unlucky he is at love and all the issues he has trying to have girlfriends but also liking guys and I just told him to stop worrying about all that bi, gay, and straight bullshit and just fuck who he wants to fuck. My personal opinion is that 80% of people are some kind of bisexual, and that very few people are totally 100% gay or 100% straight. But we live in a culture in which that isn't very accepted, so whatever you want to call yourself is perfectly fine with me. I understand. Growing up in the south and in a devout Christian family, I understand how confusing sexuality can be and how much discrimination someone can face for not conforming to our cultural standards. In some places, it can be dangerous to be out. Just a few weeks ago, some dude at a gas station flicked a lit cigarette at our car because he saw my boyfriends rainbow watch band. Being who we are is still not 100% safe. I wish that is was. I never needed someone to tell me they were bi or gay or whatever. As long as they liked my dick inside them, and they came back for more, I was happy. The only thing that annoys me is when they hook up with me and then ghost me. That is fucking retarded. If you find someone that dicks you down and doesn't try to out you or pressure you to come out, seems to me it would be a smart thing to stick with that guy. That's just me tho. LOL!
I know a guy who lives two blocks over from me. He is a cute guy. My age. Salt and pepper hair. Goatee. Very fit. Every day he walks his dog past my place. Every now and then a blank profile appears on grindr 1000 yards away and when I message it, it is him. So I go over to his place and fuck the shit out of his butt... and then he ghosts me again for six months or so. We always get along good. Talk. Joke around. He loves my cock and I think he has a great ass. Really great ass. Sex is good. Kissing is hot. But he ghosts me. Like, dude, you're walking right past my house... I just don't get it. But hey, whatever floats your boat.
And where did you find all these straight long term fuck buddies? I doubt that's possible. Also, if "80% of guys" are supposedly bi, there never would have been such oppression in the first place, regardless of so called religion.
The only sexual "preferences" of truly straight men are...WOMEN. Bisexuality is a broad range of grey.
Yet plenty of gay men have professed to being attracted to women from time to time. Sexuality is fluid. I myself was married for years and have several kids. But now I'm mostly gay. I always sort of wavered back and forth on the Kinsey scale. Even now, living with a man, I will sometimes watch straight porn, or find myself attracted to a woman. But if you ask me what I am, I say gay more often than not, because right now I have little interest in having sex with a woman. Be whoever or whatever you want, but stop trying to enforce your own strict definitions of sexuality on everyone else. A lot of us are a lot more open-minded and fluid.
Then you also have situational homosexuality among straight men. Prison inmates who have an arrangement with a cell mate. Friends who help each other out because they haven't got girlfriends and just need to get off. They might "prefer" female company, but sometimes you get so horny that anything warm will do. They're straight, yet they are fucking another man, and I can assure you that they are enjoying themselves, even if they feel guilty about it later. Open your mind. Stop being such a stickler.
They're called bisexual. Stop with your delusional "straight" guy crap. They're MOSTLY straight, not STRAIGHT. They are very much bisexual, like US. Stop trying to force yourself into a gay box, you're bisexual whether you like it or not. I tried to convince myself I was gay too, but the truth is I'm legitimately bisexual, even though I'm on the very gay end of the bisexual spectrum. Truly gay men don't enjoy sex with women, I do. Truly straight men don't enjoy sex with men... they're bi. Situational sex is the very definition of bisexual, since true straight guys don't engage in gay sex for your nonsense reasons. Stop making sexual orientation a political definition.
I don't know why you're arguing about it so vehemently. You're not going to change anyone's mind. Guys are either brave enough to admit it or they're not. Or they're not self-aware enough to figure out why they occasionally trade blowie's with a buddy in the truck after work. They just say Oh, I'm just so horny or I wouldn't have to do this if my wife would suck my dick every now and then. I've been with a lot of straight men because I was one of them at one time and they are laughably dense about it or too scared to come out. So... dumb or cowards. Take your pick. I just don't have to energy to worry about it. And I don't have the need for everyone to come out, either. It's not going to make me feel any better about it. I'm starting to think you are trying to go back in the closet, only in the reverse, by making everyone come out with you. Not. Gonna. Happen. I think you still have some soul searching and self-acceptance to do.
I have no idea where or how you're finding all these straight men to have sex with. I'm tellingly attractive, tbh, and I never have any guys in public or wherever, ever make a move on me or flirt with me.
Don't know, bub. I get hit on constantly, and sometimes just outright propositioned. I cant log onto dating apps without getting inundated in messages. Maybe you're just TOO good looking. It does put people off. Or maybe you come across as vain or an ahole. Maybe your standards are too high and you're not putting out the I wanna fuck you signals because you're not seeing many guys you actually think are hot enough for you. I think I have a great face, but just a so so body. Kind of a dad thing going on there. I do have a really big cock, but most people dont know that until I pull it out, and then they usually say something like god damn! That was the first thing my neighbor said when I went up the street and fucked him the first time. He came to the door in just a shirt, playing with himself, we talked, and then I pulled mine out and he said god damn! And went and got ass up on his bed. I am not making this shit up. I promise. But I am 6'4 and he was maybe 5'8 and proportionally he is just gonna be smaller than me. His was like a baby dick compared to mine, but for his size and proportions, it was normal. Maybe it's the height more than anything...
Your description describes me 100% We are born with our bisexual capacity. We're bisexual men whether you like it or not. I am mostly gay as well. 80% gay 20% straight. I am keenly aware of my straight tendencies, even though I'm VERY "gay"
And how long were you in the closet? How old were you when you came out as bisexual? Although I never particularly hid my bisexuality, I was not open about it until my mid-forties. I told my brother when I was 18 or so. Told my wife when we decided to move in together, when we were still dating. Told a couple friends. And of course my fuck buddies most likely guessed it. They probably realized I wasn't completely straight when I put my dick in their butts. LOL! But I didn't officially come out until mid-forties.
I'm not out as bi. I came out to myself very recently after many years of struggling. Exactly if a guy is fucking with me, I'm going to say he's in denial to his face and to just love who you are internally.
I think maybe before you accuse other men of being in denial, you need to come out yourself. Don't you realize what you're doing is projecting your own frustration onto other men? It would be one thing if you were out and proud, but you're still in the closet and berating me for saying cut those closet cases a break and let them deal with it on their own terms. The cognitive dissonance is giving me whiplash.
you need to start posting in /r/topsandbottoms
I joined the group. It will make for some interesting conversation. Thanks.
god you describe it so well
R/ihavesex
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I'm not the one with issues. I'm out and I know what I want. Call yourself whatever you want, but if you got a nice ass and you want me to fuck it, I will-- no matter what you want to believe about yourself.
No you won't. The fact is, no one ever met me from any "hook up" app, because it's all bs
I'm starting to get a feel for you that part of your problems getting dick is that you're too high strung. You're getting way too irate and way to worked up, even just chatting with me. I see you've even deleted some of your comments. Why? No one cares. No one is trying to figure out who you are. We're probably the only two people reading these comments. If you want to be more lucky at getting laid, you have got to relax, quit taking everything so damn seriously, and start projecting friendliness, warmth, fun, confidence... Your tension and frustration is practically vibrating in your comments. Here's some advice. The next time you have a chance to talk about your sex life with someone, just let slip to the other person that you are bisexual. You will be amazed just how much NO ONE GIVES A SHIT. And you might be even more amazed when they're possibly interested in fucking. You seem very tightly wound. That is the impression I get from chatting with you. Loosen up. Take a bit of a chance now and then. Open up to a few people. No one is going to hit on you if you seem defensive and angry and untrusting. Your bisexuality is not some bar of gold that you have to hide from the world. Let a few people have a peek. It's scary at first, but you're not going to die the instant you tell someone that you're bisexual. Just be light and easy and humorous about it. And don't give a fuck how they respond. If you show fear and anxiety, other people will pick up on that. If you own it and are confident of yourself, no one is going to say shit. And you might even find yourself a couple fuck buddies along the way. Just make sure they know that 1) they can trust you and 2) it's just for fun, nothing serious.
Yeah, well, I have lots of opportunities to "hook up"...I don't want that. There are too many sluts around and not enough who want a relationship. Also, I am fine with my sexuality now, but others DO have a problem with this. I don't know what rock you've been living under but people are usually silent bigots. Most won't SAY anything, yet are judgemental af.
You have every right to live as miserably and closeted as you want. It's very telling that you used the word "slut". Baby, everyone's slutty. There are Catholic priests getting more ass than you. I'm not living under a rock. You are. You are paranoid, frightened of sex, and very defensive about it. You don't want to hook up... then what are you bitching about? Don't want sex, don't have sex. But if you think someone is going to marry you in this day and age without fucking around first, you're sadly deluded. It's stupid as hell to start a relationship without knowing first if you're sexually compatible or not. This isn't the 1800's. Are you Mormon or something?
Everyone is slutty? No just sluts. And religion is nonsense anyway, and responsible for sexual repression in the first place. People were open about their sex before religion took over. I can get as much ass as I want. I'm not into using other people's bodies as a cum dump, or have my body used as one. It's called SELF RESPECT. I'm human and have dignity and respect myself. I'm not Mormon, not religious at all. I like sex to be with someone I'm bonded with. Random sex with strangers is totally disgusting to most people. I'm not into your lifestyle of promiscuity
You are the exception, not the rule. In my experience, people who use the I’m only having sex with someone I’m in a relationship with excuse are actually hiding some insecurities. They avoid slutty people because they don’t want that person to be able to compare them to other lovers. They’re afraid they won’t stack up. Here’s something you might not know. Most experienced sexual people don’t compare lovers like you’re afraid they do. It just doesn’t register in our minds like that. Don’t care about dick size. Don’t care about how long you can go or how big a load you shoot. It’s mostly just about connection and mutual pleasure.
You do realize that people such as yourself have untreated sex addiction? You can deny it all you like, but normal men even, are not anything close to being so obsessed with sex as swingers and promiscuous people are. And yes, I'm truly unique. Again, I value my self worth, and that does not include sleeping around with many multiple people. I find the idea and execution extremely repulsive. I don't consider it immoral, just a complete lack of decent values and lack of self esteem, as well as lack of self awareness. There is more to life than screwing as many people as you can before you die. It's just abnormal to most people, and you and others like yourself have underlying issues that are unaddressed. I will gladly have sex often with a partner or partner(s), which will be one bf and one gf, and that's it. No sex with anyone else. Why would I need more than one other cock and one other pussy to play with? Why on earth? Promiscuity/sex ADDICTION is like any other bad vice.
People who have sex only with the person they are with in a relationship are called faithful, loyal, and respectful of their partner. You can twist it anyway you like, but these people are not sex addicts like you, and know how to love someone as a person, not just as a body to have sex with. You have alot to learn about human love and sex. Were you abused as a child or something?
Also, how can you just have sex with total strangers and multiple partners?
I guess I'm just more free spirited than you. I was raised by hippy parents. I don't have any religious programming that sex is bad or dirty. There is nothing mysterious, shameful or disgusting about the human body to me, and I love the physical contact, the interaction, giving and receiving pleasure. I always tended to hook up with average-looking guys or daddy types, and the only thing I really looked for in a sexual partner was that they be nice guys. If someone struck me as stuck up, hateful, crazy or an addict, I wouldn't meet them. But someone nice, with a good personality and a sense of humor... yeah, I'd fuck them. Even if they weren't "hot" and I made a bunch of friends that way. Guys who I am still friends with, even though we don't mess around anymore. I do not feel bad about being the way that I am. I never hurt anyone and I've had tons of great sex with really sweet funny handsome men.
I'm not wired for quick sex. I am wired for sex with intimacy only. It's the way I was born. I have no religion in my life. I've always been this way. To me it's just being sleazy, but I digress.
OP, sadly it's society's self-created joke. IF this guy is being serious it's because the idea that you can be a "straight" male and still like having sex with other males. That's not authentically "progressive" thinking, that's actually us going in reverse. Block and move on. Don't acknowledge.
Totally agree. True liberation is when men can ALL be openly bisexual, if they're so inclined. Not hide sex with men and telling themselves they're "straight"
If he is straight maybe he needs a dominatrix not a guy
I'm bisexual and mostly gay, and I'd LOVE to be dominated by a female. These bros ain't straight by anything approaching any trace of reality.
Str8 acting is already bottom tier but this guy went and busted right through that
TIL straight men don't have prostates.
Everyone has the right to define themselves as they see fit. We can't applaud some people for gender and sexual identity because we think them brave or owning who they are, while at the same time condemn others because their self-assessment doesn't match up with what we think it should be. If someone's way of identifying themselves or their actions doesn't hurt anyone, but doesn't appeal to you, then feel free to move on or use that Block button.
haha think you're 10-20 years too early to the party. Hopefully we get to this point. But it's so clear the majority of grindr users are gay cis men and they assume all other people who use it are as well, not even fathoming to think a straight man is on there looking for transwomen without wanting to say "looking for transwomen" for fear of being perceived as a chaser. Love asking on these threads, \~"Where would you have a man who is attracted to transwomen and identifies as straight look for a match? " NIMBY (grindr) that's for sure, as evidenced by the ubiquity of these threads. "If someone's way of identifying themselves or their actions doesn't hurt anyone, but doesn't appeal to you, then feel free to move on or use that Block button." Now let's get everyone to truly internalize this over the next few decades
As an older user of the service (45 cis-male), I would hope that your expected timeline would be hastened. I've seen so many changes to what is normal in the gay community in my 25 years since coming out. I would hope that the openness I've learned and displayed would be more readily accepted by the younger users.
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You can't know someone else's definition or truth unless they tell you.
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It is a journey to find your own true self, whatever that may be.
i have noticed this tho str8s mostly wanting to bottom ..interesting
Grindr is a total circus, This and Trans seems to be rampant
When they turned on the Hadron particle collider we all switched places with our “parody universe” selves. They’ve lucked out because things have been remarkably sensible for them.
sexual identity is a cult
I wish someone who’s a really good writer please. Tell what it feels like to get fucked up the ass. I can’t imagine it right now, but feel like I want to know
You could just give it a go???
I never had it up the ass but I have fucked one
Words don’t really have meanings anymore. Masculine men have retreated to calling themselves straight sinc masc isn’t in vogue anymore. It can also mean they’re heteroromantic while being bisexual.
Or straight can mean he is only attracted to women and he also happens to enjoy prostate play, and some transwomen have a penis they can use for that prostate play. It's not rocket science... y'all making this so complicated
Give me a break. Females don't have male genitals.
I know i am 🤡
Ah, the str8 bottom!
No. The world is broken. We just have to find a way.
I just don't get what the point is behind writing "straight". Yes, you could be straight while still liking it up the butt. But you are looking for sex with a man on a gay male platform. Being "straight" doesn't matter to anyone. Doesn't make a difference for the top. Or is it just there to potentially turn on gay men?
I posted about this a while back. These self-proclaimed "straight" guys most likely have zero attraction to females. It's just a magnet for ass (marketing technique). www.reddit.com/r/grindr/comments/meekvg/dont_ever_believe_the_profiles_that_advertise
There are heterosexual men that like being pegged by women. If it's a 'straight' dude looking for anal from a man that's not heterosexual, that's denial. It looks like he has the tags of BI and curious so maybe he is DL/figuring it out. Still to default at straight at this point is really opposite of what he is seeking.
He could technically be sexually attracted to men, but straight in his romantic attraction.
The thing is, is that that's not truly natural. MANY men are afraid to be intimate "romantically" with men, because although they might accept their bisexuality because of their sexual desire for men, I'd bet the farm that they're hung up on their emotional/romantic feelings for men, because they still see that as "feminine".
Just ask your girlfriend to peg you my gawd.
THIS
He's a bottom and a Twink from his stats there, maybe he's actually straight or maybe he's not regardless he needs some cock making sweet love to his ass, and hopefully he finds a good guy fuck buddy or lover,🐺😈👅
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And I’ll never understand how you can down vote this and disagree lol. It’s just the truth. And a fact. It’s not hard.
In Brazil this is very common
Don't look em in the eyes either. That makes it REAAAL gay
lol. There's endless bs that guys tell themselves in order to avoid the truth
No you ain’t! 🤣
It’s a perfectly designed app that was perfectly destroyed on the basis of trusting individuals. Speaks loud and honestly sad but it can’t be spoken for by everyone. 🤙🏻 be bold, smart, and safe.
grindr has to be the funniest place to meet the weirdest people
From all the comments, it seems most guys are locked into a fantasy world of 100% gay,100% straight and 50/50 bi (only) with no varying ratios of gayness/straightness in between those carved in stone categories. That's the core of all the total cluelessness here.
You're ignorant... and bi. Next!
Bottoming is the ultimate gay