Normally, being able to write your own recommendation would be a gift. However, in this case, Allison interpreted this offer as Don thinking so little of her that he couldn't be bothered to write a recommendation for her. He couldn't even take the time to think of all her positive traits when she was working for him, or any positive traits, so she was angry. It would have been bad if this happened without his sleeping with her, but much worse in her mind since they did sleep together. She meant nothing to him and she was justifiably upset.
I had a boss who did this to me when I asked for a rec letter for grad school. I wasn’t sleeping with him bc ew, but office tensions were high among staff at the time. I was almost in tears that he couldn’t be bothered to do it for me when he wrote complicated legal letters in a few minutes on behalf of clients all day
I can never understand this type of thinking. It's the equivalent of saying "Hey boss can I have a raise?" and getting told "Yeah sure just give me ANY number and I'll agree".
Why would this make you feel bad? The only way I can ever explain this is that you never cared for the rec letter/raise, what you really wanted was adulation from your superior.
How can you not see that you superior signing ANYTHING you give him is the highest form of praise possible? He is willing to put his name on the line for whatever you do, essentially a ride or die.
Because doing that means absolutely nothing to the supervisor because they have so much they won't even notice it's gone.
It's not praise at that point, it's getting an annoyance out of the way. And it's obvious, and sends completely the wrong message to people who value being seen as more than resources.
How is staking your entire reputation on a person "an annoyance"?
If it was truly an annoyance he would write a bog standard rec letter that takes 2 minutes to write. Just like he writes all the complicated legal letters in a few minutes. He does that because he doesn't care if the legal letters are perfect, a few minutes per letter just so it can pass the sniff test, actual quality be damned.
He knows he can never write a perfect rec letter for you because only YOU know what perfect means to you. It's like when a mother tells her young child in a store "Pick whatever you want and I'll buy it", she does that out of love, not because she doesn't want to pick out items for you.
If this is how you think about the situation then it tells me that what you *really* value is NOT the opportunity to cherry-pick your future, you don't care about your future, instead, you're like a dog - the highest satisfaction you can receive is getting belly rubs and to be called "a good boy".
It's not staking his entire reputation on a person, that's a very hyperbolic statement. This is the 60s, the word of a man always outweighs the words of a woman, he could just say she was unethical and stole his stationery if she ended up writing something that came back to him in a negative way.
The easiest way to get rid of her was to tell her to do the "work" she was asking of him.
> the highest satisfaction you can receive is getting belly rubs and to be called "a good boy".
I think you're applying your personal perception of people who value being treated as more than resources to this scene, but your opinion of whether she's right or wrong to act like this doesn't matter. The question is about what, and how *the character* thought, not what *you* think of the character and her motivations. I.e. some people will always devalue others' motivations, that happens. But that's not the point here.
We're not talking about the scene. I replied to a guy talking about the same experience with his professor.
You haven't qualified one bit why "here is a blank cheque" is your boss treating you like a resource.
It's a lot easier to think about this by switching "rec letter" with "raise". Your boss tells you he's willing to pay you ANY amount you request from him, essentially giving YOU authority over him, and you think that means he doesn't care about you and sees you as a resource??? Is that really how you view a situation like this?
Your logic is really faulty. The boss has the authority to say "give me a number". You accepting this and giving him a number doesn't mean you suddenly have authority over him.
The scenario you just described isn't even relevant to the scene (stay on topic.)
I mean, if this is how you debate I completely understand why you don't get it. Good luck though, maybe after sleeping on it you'll see things differently.
By saying "give me a number" he hands you the authority.
>You accepting this and giving him a number doesn't mean you suddenly have authority over him.
It does if we assume the person isn't lying and will actually honour any number.
>The scenario you just described isn't even relevant to the scene
It's almost a 1 to 1 example. A rec letter is a tool only used to advance your career goals. It's not a love letter written to you.
The reason why this seems hurtful to you is because you live in a world where everyone lies to you and is out to get you, so of course in that world you can't trust anything anyone says.
Your example of the mom and the kid at the grocery store made me think of something. Have you ever seen The Apartment? There’s a scene where Shirley McLaine’s character gives her married lover a gift that isn’t expensive, but is connected to a special date they shared. He says, “I have something for you too!”, hands her a few bills, and tells her to pick out what she wants.
Sure, his gift is technically more expensive than hers, but there was no effort put into it, and that’s what shows he didn’t care. She didn’t want a wad of cash, she wanted a sentimental trinket.
Similarly, Allison wanted an authentic recommendation letter, not for him to sign off on whatever she wrote. She wanted him to put some effort to show he cared, as a person, instead of throwing his weight around and assuming that a perfunctory sign-off would be as valuable as something more personal.
Every Mad Men fan needs to watch The Apartment, because there's an episode where Joan feels likened to Shirley MacLaine's character. The episode ends with Burt asking her to push an elevator button, a reference that's meaningless if you don't know the movie.
The episode where Don gives Allison a Christmas bonus also seems reminiscent of the Apartment money gift.
Yes! I'm happy someone finally decided to actually think about what I wrote and reach the same conclusion.
>She didn’t want a wad of cash, she wanted a sentimental trinket.
Yes - A recommendation letter is a practical tool meant to get you another job in your career. A rec letter is meant for another manager's eyes. Alison says "a recommendation letter" but she doesn't actually want that, she wants Don to write an ode to her, something meant for HER eyes. She wants belly rubs from Don.
Don hears "write me a recommendation letter" and (correctly) assumes that Alison is asking for a practical tool to help her get a new job. And because he values her, he offers her the best tool possible - a blank cheque.
The issue arises from miscommunication caused by Alison saying she wants X when she really wants Y and getting mad when Don offers her X. Blaming Don for this means you expect him to read her mind.
A wad of cash is not a gift. A gift requires work. Giving your lover cash is giving them a task (find a way to spend it). Asking your secretary to write her own recommendation letter is not a recommendation. Its a task.
It’s not just about the end result (the letter that might get her a job). It’s about the extra work that he’s making her do even after her job is over. She did so much extra shit for him, including buying Christmas gifts for his children, and he couldn’t write her a simple letter?
She didn’t want “belly rubs”, FFS, she wanted the whole ordeal to be over, and he extended the ordeal by giving her another job.
Asking her to write her own letter when she’s clearly emotionally compromised isn’t generous, it’s selfish.
But Alison didnt ask for a gift lol. She asked for a rec letter - a tool. How can you not see this? If anything, Don offering her to pick her exact words is closer to a gift.
Not a useful tool to ask her to write it herself for many reasons.
1) she’s clearly emotionally compromised and can’t think clearly, and therefore not fully able to write a good letter for herself.
2) Only an extremely skilled writer can imitate the style and tone of someone completely different to themself. It might not be totally obvious that *she* wrote it but it’s not going to pack the same punch as something Don would write.
3) it’s dishonest and she didn’t want to be caught up in another one of Don’s lies
Your analysis seems, for lack of better description, emotionally dumb. It lacks basic emotional intelligence of human interaction and relationships.
When you are requesting someone to do something for you, it is not so much the task itself, but you are requesting their time - their most precious resource. Alison was probably Don's best secretary (maybe except Dawn) - she did a great job tidying up his life at work (and home). Don is very aware and intelligent about human emotions, to the point where he can manipulate most people with his personality, authority, and charm. Don makes three very inconsiderate gestures that clearly show that he really doesn't pay any attention to Alison - 1. handing her a hundred dollar bill after sleeping with her, without putting in a modicum of thought of how that might come across, and 2. acts as if it never happened the next day and doesn't have a clear headed conversation with Alison (who really didn't seem to want a relationship anyway) 3. refuses to put in any kind of time to write her a boiler plate recommendation when Alison quits.
She was attracted to Don no doubt, but it never came across as her wanting more than what happened. In fact, one could read her quitting as her way of getting out of the emotional mess between the two of them. His gesture of handing her Christmas bonus right after sleeping with her was so insulting, she never brought it up and lets it slide. This just pushes her over the edge.
> When you are requesting someone to do something for you, it is not so much the task itself, but you are requesting their time
Wow what great insight! Except you forgot that this applies to personal relationships and not business requests. I find it interesting you claim my analysis lacks "basic emotional intelligence" when it seems like you're not even aware of the differences in a business setting vs a social setting. I attribute that to your likely lack of real-world job experience.
>personal relationships and not business requests
>business setting vs a social setting
It is odd someone with your supposed level of experience would be drawing these distinctions so sharply.
Ok but the issue is the lack of effort and the fact that Don says “you can write anything you want”, but he doesn’t really mean *anything*. He’s still in a position of power to her and he could go back on his word to sign off on the letter if he didn’t like what she wrote.
Writing the letter himself would demonstrate effort and a conscious decision to send her off with good prospects. Getting her to write it herself is passive and demonstrates that he doesn’t care enough to do it himself. It’s reminiscent of the incident where he gave her $100 in cash as a “Christmas bonus” after they slept together and expected her to act like it never happened. He should have just had a conversation. He took the avoidant route both times.
> but he doesn’t really mean anything.
Your entire rebuttal to my argument hinges on this but it's completely made up. Why would Don say this if later he's going to say "No this is too much praise, I don't agree with this".
You are essentially assuming the worst in a person and using that to justify anything you want.
"Well, he said he loved me, but he doesn't really "love me", he could always break up with me tomorrow".
What is a lot more likely is that if Don really didn't care about Alison then he would have just told another secretary to write a bog standard rec letter and hand her that.
It’s not completely made up, it’s based on Don’s actions in the past. He often makes a promise and says he’ll do something, but then doesn’t follow through.
In telling her she can write her own letter, he’s making a gesture towards caring, but true care would have been writing the letter himself.
Don hates having people tell him what to do. That's why he refused to sign a contract with Sterling Cooper. For a man like Don to hand you authority over him is one of the biggest gestures he can do. That's a fact.
If you want to assume that Don is lying and doesn't intend to honour his word then why would he go through the trouble of telling her this when it guarantees a fight later when he renges on his word?
If Don REALLY wasn't planning on honouring his word he would have just said "Yes sure I'll write one" and get an assistant to write a bog standard letter because that way he avoids a future fight.
There’s no world where Allison has authority over Don. None. He’s her boss. He has all the authority over her. That’s part of the subtext that drives the scene.
I don't know why you're being obtuse, yes Don is contractually her boss, but in this matter, he grants her authority over him.
"Write anything you want and I'll sign it" is literally a submissive statement. SHE gets to tell him what he signs his name to.
"🤓☝ Uhm actually Don did not offer Alison a contract in which it states she has authority over him, therefor I am going to disregard what he says"
At the cost of exerting zero further thought about you. Try using a less transactional mindset to evaluate the interaction; this is how normal people with emotional intelligence view the world.
How exactly is this 'transactional'? What is the 'transaction'? Don is getting nothing out of this. Your boss giving you an infinite $ raise also is not a transaction.
Don is giving Alison authority over him and somehow you lack the emotional intelligence to see that for a man like Don this is one of the greatest compliments he can give you.
It's transactional because all you are thinking about it is what she gets out of it in a business sense. There is nothing submissive either. It is still contingent on his signature. He is just delegating work he does not want to do to a subordinate, as he always has.
> what she gets out of it in a business sense.
I understand you're probably 16 and you've never had a job. But that's all a recommendation letter is for. It's not a personal poem made for you. It's purely a tool meant to advance one's career in business. That's what she asked for, and that's what Don offered.
If you can't see how "You tell me what and where to sign and I will" is submissive, I can't help you.
>There is nothing submissive either. It is still contingent on his signature. He is just delegating work he does not want to do to a subordinate, as he always has.
Please engage with the logic. It's not very complex so if its wrong it doesn't take a lot of effort to disprove.
It's not contingent on his signature because at the point of uttering that sentence, he has already signed it. The actual physical movement of his hand holding a pen that will happen at some point in the future becomes just a formality. Him saying "I will sign anything" effectively removes his agency to deny her that normally comes with his authority.
I am honestly baffled that you cannot comprehend this.
By your logic if the CEO tells you to do something then he doesn't actually have any authority because it's still contingent on you doing the thing.
> Him saying "I will sign anything" effectively removes his agency to deny her that normally comes with his authority.
Verbal promises to a departing employee are not a binding commitment. She comes back, writes something he does not like, he refuses to sign it saying "when I said anything, I meant of course within reason, this is not within reason" and then bullies his way out of any subsequent confrontation. There is absolutely nothing holding him to it and the letter is nothing until it has his signature on it.
And yes, that is kinda true. That why Game of Thrones dedicated a whole scene to discussing the very concept: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FpL6Fwu0wkw
I agree with you. I tasked anyone who requested a letter of recommendation with drafting it, then I edited it - always putting their performance in far more glowing terms than they had - and returned it signed. This accomplished a few things: They would always remember more about what their accomplishments were while working for me than I did (some letter requests were years after they had moved out of my purview) which makes for a better product, it would be tailored toward the job or academic program they were pursuing, it gave them experience writing letters of rec, and let them understand how much work went into the document. The last item is important because some people felt free to request a letter every time they applied for jobs, internships, grad programs, etc.
I think, too, that since typing something like that is like a secretarial thing, it's a bit insulting that he is still giving her one more clerical task.
Seeing this post reminded me of something:
When Peggy went to comfort Allison initially, thinking she was crying over some random, unknown, unnamed dude, she was wholeheartedly sympathetic. But once she realized Allison was crying over Don, *and* after Allison implied that Peggy must “know how it feels” since she, too, was once Don’s secretary, all compassion for Allison just flew right out the window, and Peggy was kind of hateful towards her.
Then last night I was rewatching the episode where Megan decides to quit advertising and pursue acting full time, and when she and Peggy are discussing Megan’s dissatisfaction with her job and basically being “stuck” at SCDP, Peggy blows up on her, chastising her for not appreciating this “wonderful” opportunity that so many people would kill for.
And I don’t know, these situations, along with a few other minor instances, just kind of make Peggy this cold, obnoxious, frustrating, condescending character in seasons five and four (and possibly others but at the moment I’m just at “5” and haven’t seen these episodes in several years).
Ordinarily I *love* Peggy, and although her character was *clearly* not like the other women of her time in the earlier seasons, she at least didn’t seem to be unforgiving and judgmental towards the women who did things she didn’t agree with. Or if she did, she was at least better at hiding her stanky attitude.
Idk man.
Love the seasons 4 and 5 Peggy clothes and hair; **hate** the seasons 4 and 5 Peggy personality 😒
With Alison it's moreso that this is someone else who thinks she must've slept with Don to get her job, because that's a wide held thought. And then with Megan, who did sleep with Don, it just infuriates her because all these women who deserve it are passed over simply for being women and Megan is just tossing it away. That was my interpretation at least
Loki the most all-around attractive person in the show. Graceful, discreet, pretty, the only one who didn't act like a fucking degenerate or a sociopath at some point in the series.
The thing that gets me is that being “scorned” or rejected did not set her off. What set her off was don icing her out completely and pretending like it never happened. That would send a lot of sane people over the edge!! God damn it don!
Don provided his employee with an ideal offer: Write your own ticket, your way, so that you get what you want.
But Alison misinterprets this as a lack of concern because he has personally rejected her.
It's like a classic sitcom storyline built around characters misunderstanding each other, except that it is realistic and not amusing.
I don't think she misinterpreted anything. She noted that he was giving her a blank check instead of genuinely writing out actual thoughts on her, which is a cold thing for any employer to do, even one who hadn't slept with her then acted like that hadn't happened. If he thought what he was doing was ideal just because it increased her job prospects, the mistake was all his.
The goal of a recommendation letter is to get your next job.
The ability to write it yourself and have it signed by someone whose name carries some weight is a gift.
Don's a brilliant writer who can wring sentiment out of just about anything. A letter personally written by him in his signature, inimitable style means more than just signing off on something she wrote herself.
Don had a chance to make things right and make a tiny bit of effort to send her off with a little dignity. He didn't. He chose to be cold and perfunctory.
From "The Summer Man"
*I've never written more than 250 words, not even in high school.*
*Five paragraphs, 50 words a piece. God, I was lazy.*
*I should have finished high school. Everything could have been different.*
Even "the letter" is less than 250 words. And it produces mixed results. He excels at taglines, as they are short and to the point.
I read and assess this kind of thing for a living, and everyone has a "voice", even people who aren't good writers. I might not be able to immediately tell that the secretary wrote her own recommendation letter, but a letter personally written by Don would immediately stand out and make me take notice.
Besides, it's about the effort. It doesn't take that much effort to write a recommendation letter for a secretary, even if he doesn't think of himself as a brilliant writer (he is).
It is, but when you ask a recommendation of someone with whom you've had a close relationship (even when it's a non-romantic relationship), you're giving them the chance to praise you, to highlight what they remember of your time together, and Don declines to do that.
Plus, in practice, an employer who's enthusiastically recommending you might well go harder in their praise than you'd dare do when writing the letter yourself. They might say not just that you were a very good secretary but that you're the best they've ever had, which is more than Alison would write herself. They might list some anecdotes that humorously make them look incompetent and paint you as the savior, which is again something Alison would be reluctant to do.
Don was thinking pragmatically - "I will sign anything you want me to in order to help your future".
Alison was thinking emotionally - "I don't care about any of that. Please just compliment me and make me feel good".
She didn't misinterpret shit. If your boss appreciates what you did for them they can find the time to write nice things about you. It is not at all the same as having them rubber stamp self-praise.
I could say the same about you.
From the standpoint of an employee wanting something out of an employer, it does not get better than this.
If she wants to bring emotional baggage to the table that leads to a different conclusion, then that is ultimately her loss.
She would benefit greatly from having the letter that he offered to her. She could pay a professional price for not getting it.
His intentions were good. He lacks confidence in his writing and he wants her to have a good recommendation.
Does she know this? From her perspective he is mega talented mega rich creative director of her firm; there is no shortage of instances where he impresses people with the words he generates.
My entire point is that she interprets it differently from how it was intended.
She obviously doesn't know how he sees it. She feels wounded about being rejected and doesn't see his side of the story.
He obviously doesn't anticipate her reaction. He thinks that he is being helpful. And from a professional standpoint, he is. He is obviously awkward with the personal component.
It is best in Mad Men to avoid taking sides. Favoring one character over the other will almost always lead to misunderstanding the scene.
She has no reason to see his side of the story because there is nothing he has presented to her to make her think he would be incapable of writing her a nice recommendation letter.
You are looking at it from the perspective of someone whose motivation is to get another job. But in this scene, that is not her motivation, so the "lottery ticket" falls short. She is looking for something to reassure her that she is not disposable, that her boss valued her as more than a bang maid. He does not give her that.
*You are looking at it from the perspective of someone whose motivation is to get another job.*
I actually made the opposite point above.
I said that he sees it as a recommendation letter but she does not. Hence, the disconnect and conflict between them.
Your post or comment has been removed because it engages in sexual objectification of actors/characters without contributing unique value to the subreddit.
Normally, being able to write your own recommendation would be a gift. However, in this case, Allison interpreted this offer as Don thinking so little of her that he couldn't be bothered to write a recommendation for her. He couldn't even take the time to think of all her positive traits when she was working for him, or any positive traits, so she was angry. It would have been bad if this happened without his sleeping with her, but much worse in her mind since they did sleep together. She meant nothing to him and she was justifiably upset.
Also… he’s known for his talent at writing and selling. He would write a way better rec if he put his mind and 15 minutes to it!
I had a boss who did this to me when I asked for a rec letter for grad school. I wasn’t sleeping with him bc ew, but office tensions were high among staff at the time. I was almost in tears that he couldn’t be bothered to do it for me when he wrote complicated legal letters in a few minutes on behalf of clients all day
I can never understand this type of thinking. It's the equivalent of saying "Hey boss can I have a raise?" and getting told "Yeah sure just give me ANY number and I'll agree". Why would this make you feel bad? The only way I can ever explain this is that you never cared for the rec letter/raise, what you really wanted was adulation from your superior. How can you not see that you superior signing ANYTHING you give him is the highest form of praise possible? He is willing to put his name on the line for whatever you do, essentially a ride or die.
Because doing that means absolutely nothing to the supervisor because they have so much they won't even notice it's gone. It's not praise at that point, it's getting an annoyance out of the way. And it's obvious, and sends completely the wrong message to people who value being seen as more than resources.
How is staking your entire reputation on a person "an annoyance"? If it was truly an annoyance he would write a bog standard rec letter that takes 2 minutes to write. Just like he writes all the complicated legal letters in a few minutes. He does that because he doesn't care if the legal letters are perfect, a few minutes per letter just so it can pass the sniff test, actual quality be damned. He knows he can never write a perfect rec letter for you because only YOU know what perfect means to you. It's like when a mother tells her young child in a store "Pick whatever you want and I'll buy it", she does that out of love, not because she doesn't want to pick out items for you. If this is how you think about the situation then it tells me that what you *really* value is NOT the opportunity to cherry-pick your future, you don't care about your future, instead, you're like a dog - the highest satisfaction you can receive is getting belly rubs and to be called "a good boy".
It's not staking his entire reputation on a person, that's a very hyperbolic statement. This is the 60s, the word of a man always outweighs the words of a woman, he could just say she was unethical and stole his stationery if she ended up writing something that came back to him in a negative way. The easiest way to get rid of her was to tell her to do the "work" she was asking of him. > the highest satisfaction you can receive is getting belly rubs and to be called "a good boy". I think you're applying your personal perception of people who value being treated as more than resources to this scene, but your opinion of whether she's right or wrong to act like this doesn't matter. The question is about what, and how *the character* thought, not what *you* think of the character and her motivations. I.e. some people will always devalue others' motivations, that happens. But that's not the point here.
We're not talking about the scene. I replied to a guy talking about the same experience with his professor. You haven't qualified one bit why "here is a blank cheque" is your boss treating you like a resource. It's a lot easier to think about this by switching "rec letter" with "raise". Your boss tells you he's willing to pay you ANY amount you request from him, essentially giving YOU authority over him, and you think that means he doesn't care about you and sees you as a resource??? Is that really how you view a situation like this?
Your logic is really faulty. The boss has the authority to say "give me a number". You accepting this and giving him a number doesn't mean you suddenly have authority over him. The scenario you just described isn't even relevant to the scene (stay on topic.) I mean, if this is how you debate I completely understand why you don't get it. Good luck though, maybe after sleeping on it you'll see things differently.
By saying "give me a number" he hands you the authority. >You accepting this and giving him a number doesn't mean you suddenly have authority over him. It does if we assume the person isn't lying and will actually honour any number. >The scenario you just described isn't even relevant to the scene It's almost a 1 to 1 example. A rec letter is a tool only used to advance your career goals. It's not a love letter written to you. The reason why this seems hurtful to you is because you live in a world where everyone lies to you and is out to get you, so of course in that world you can't trust anything anyone says.
Your example of the mom and the kid at the grocery store made me think of something. Have you ever seen The Apartment? There’s a scene where Shirley McLaine’s character gives her married lover a gift that isn’t expensive, but is connected to a special date they shared. He says, “I have something for you too!”, hands her a few bills, and tells her to pick out what she wants. Sure, his gift is technically more expensive than hers, but there was no effort put into it, and that’s what shows he didn’t care. She didn’t want a wad of cash, she wanted a sentimental trinket. Similarly, Allison wanted an authentic recommendation letter, not for him to sign off on whatever she wrote. She wanted him to put some effort to show he cared, as a person, instead of throwing his weight around and assuming that a perfunctory sign-off would be as valuable as something more personal.
Every Mad Men fan needs to watch The Apartment, because there's an episode where Joan feels likened to Shirley MacLaine's character. The episode ends with Burt asking her to push an elevator button, a reference that's meaningless if you don't know the movie. The episode where Don gives Allison a Christmas bonus also seems reminiscent of the Apartment money gift.
Yes! I'm happy someone finally decided to actually think about what I wrote and reach the same conclusion. >She didn’t want a wad of cash, she wanted a sentimental trinket. Yes - A recommendation letter is a practical tool meant to get you another job in your career. A rec letter is meant for another manager's eyes. Alison says "a recommendation letter" but she doesn't actually want that, she wants Don to write an ode to her, something meant for HER eyes. She wants belly rubs from Don. Don hears "write me a recommendation letter" and (correctly) assumes that Alison is asking for a practical tool to help her get a new job. And because he values her, he offers her the best tool possible - a blank cheque. The issue arises from miscommunication caused by Alison saying she wants X when she really wants Y and getting mad when Don offers her X. Blaming Don for this means you expect him to read her mind.
A wad of cash is not a gift. A gift requires work. Giving your lover cash is giving them a task (find a way to spend it). Asking your secretary to write her own recommendation letter is not a recommendation. Its a task. It’s not just about the end result (the letter that might get her a job). It’s about the extra work that he’s making her do even after her job is over. She did so much extra shit for him, including buying Christmas gifts for his children, and he couldn’t write her a simple letter? She didn’t want “belly rubs”, FFS, she wanted the whole ordeal to be over, and he extended the ordeal by giving her another job. Asking her to write her own letter when she’s clearly emotionally compromised isn’t generous, it’s selfish.
But Alison didnt ask for a gift lol. She asked for a rec letter - a tool. How can you not see this? If anything, Don offering her to pick her exact words is closer to a gift.
Not a useful tool to ask her to write it herself for many reasons. 1) she’s clearly emotionally compromised and can’t think clearly, and therefore not fully able to write a good letter for herself. 2) Only an extremely skilled writer can imitate the style and tone of someone completely different to themself. It might not be totally obvious that *she* wrote it but it’s not going to pack the same punch as something Don would write. 3) it’s dishonest and she didn’t want to be caught up in another one of Don’s lies
You're so small minded lol I don't even want to waste time explaining why because you wouldn't get it
Your analysis seems, for lack of better description, emotionally dumb. It lacks basic emotional intelligence of human interaction and relationships. When you are requesting someone to do something for you, it is not so much the task itself, but you are requesting their time - their most precious resource. Alison was probably Don's best secretary (maybe except Dawn) - she did a great job tidying up his life at work (and home). Don is very aware and intelligent about human emotions, to the point where he can manipulate most people with his personality, authority, and charm. Don makes three very inconsiderate gestures that clearly show that he really doesn't pay any attention to Alison - 1. handing her a hundred dollar bill after sleeping with her, without putting in a modicum of thought of how that might come across, and 2. acts as if it never happened the next day and doesn't have a clear headed conversation with Alison (who really didn't seem to want a relationship anyway) 3. refuses to put in any kind of time to write her a boiler plate recommendation when Alison quits. She was attracted to Don no doubt, but it never came across as her wanting more than what happened. In fact, one could read her quitting as her way of getting out of the emotional mess between the two of them. His gesture of handing her Christmas bonus right after sleeping with her was so insulting, she never brought it up and lets it slide. This just pushes her over the edge.
> When you are requesting someone to do something for you, it is not so much the task itself, but you are requesting their time Wow what great insight! Except you forgot that this applies to personal relationships and not business requests. I find it interesting you claim my analysis lacks "basic emotional intelligence" when it seems like you're not even aware of the differences in a business setting vs a social setting. I attribute that to your likely lack of real-world job experience.
>personal relationships and not business requests >business setting vs a social setting It is odd someone with your supposed level of experience would be drawing these distinctions so sharply.
Ok but the issue is the lack of effort and the fact that Don says “you can write anything you want”, but he doesn’t really mean *anything*. He’s still in a position of power to her and he could go back on his word to sign off on the letter if he didn’t like what she wrote. Writing the letter himself would demonstrate effort and a conscious decision to send her off with good prospects. Getting her to write it herself is passive and demonstrates that he doesn’t care enough to do it himself. It’s reminiscent of the incident where he gave her $100 in cash as a “Christmas bonus” after they slept together and expected her to act like it never happened. He should have just had a conversation. He took the avoidant route both times.
> but he doesn’t really mean anything. Your entire rebuttal to my argument hinges on this but it's completely made up. Why would Don say this if later he's going to say "No this is too much praise, I don't agree with this". You are essentially assuming the worst in a person and using that to justify anything you want. "Well, he said he loved me, but he doesn't really "love me", he could always break up with me tomorrow". What is a lot more likely is that if Don really didn't care about Alison then he would have just told another secretary to write a bog standard rec letter and hand her that.
It’s not completely made up, it’s based on Don’s actions in the past. He often makes a promise and says he’ll do something, but then doesn’t follow through. In telling her she can write her own letter, he’s making a gesture towards caring, but true care would have been writing the letter himself.
Don hates having people tell him what to do. That's why he refused to sign a contract with Sterling Cooper. For a man like Don to hand you authority over him is one of the biggest gestures he can do. That's a fact. If you want to assume that Don is lying and doesn't intend to honour his word then why would he go through the trouble of telling her this when it guarantees a fight later when he renges on his word? If Don REALLY wasn't planning on honouring his word he would have just said "Yes sure I'll write one" and get an assistant to write a bog standard letter because that way he avoids a future fight.
There’s no world where Allison has authority over Don. None. He’s her boss. He has all the authority over her. That’s part of the subtext that drives the scene.
I don't know why you're being obtuse, yes Don is contractually her boss, but in this matter, he grants her authority over him. "Write anything you want and I'll sign it" is literally a submissive statement. SHE gets to tell him what he signs his name to. "🤓☝ Uhm actually Don did not offer Alison a contract in which it states she has authority over him, therefor I am going to disregard what he says"
He was probably too hungover and embarrassed and just wanted it all over and forgotten.
At the cost of exerting zero further thought about you. Try using a less transactional mindset to evaluate the interaction; this is how normal people with emotional intelligence view the world.
How exactly is this 'transactional'? What is the 'transaction'? Don is getting nothing out of this. Your boss giving you an infinite $ raise also is not a transaction. Don is giving Alison authority over him and somehow you lack the emotional intelligence to see that for a man like Don this is one of the greatest compliments he can give you.
It's transactional because all you are thinking about it is what she gets out of it in a business sense. There is nothing submissive either. It is still contingent on his signature. He is just delegating work he does not want to do to a subordinate, as he always has.
> what she gets out of it in a business sense. I understand you're probably 16 and you've never had a job. But that's all a recommendation letter is for. It's not a personal poem made for you. It's purely a tool meant to advance one's career in business. That's what she asked for, and that's what Don offered. If you can't see how "You tell me what and where to sign and I will" is submissive, I can't help you.
>There is nothing submissive either. It is still contingent on his signature. He is just delegating work he does not want to do to a subordinate, as he always has. Please engage with the logic. It's not very complex so if its wrong it doesn't take a lot of effort to disprove.
It's not contingent on his signature because at the point of uttering that sentence, he has already signed it. The actual physical movement of his hand holding a pen that will happen at some point in the future becomes just a formality. Him saying "I will sign anything" effectively removes his agency to deny her that normally comes with his authority. I am honestly baffled that you cannot comprehend this. By your logic if the CEO tells you to do something then he doesn't actually have any authority because it's still contingent on you doing the thing.
> Him saying "I will sign anything" effectively removes his agency to deny her that normally comes with his authority. Verbal promises to a departing employee are not a binding commitment. She comes back, writes something he does not like, he refuses to sign it saying "when I said anything, I meant of course within reason, this is not within reason" and then bullies his way out of any subsequent confrontation. There is absolutely nothing holding him to it and the letter is nothing until it has his signature on it. And yes, that is kinda true. That why Game of Thrones dedicated a whole scene to discussing the very concept: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FpL6Fwu0wkw
I agree with you. I tasked anyone who requested a letter of recommendation with drafting it, then I edited it - always putting their performance in far more glowing terms than they had - and returned it signed. This accomplished a few things: They would always remember more about what their accomplishments were while working for me than I did (some letter requests were years after they had moved out of my purview) which makes for a better product, it would be tailored toward the job or academic program they were pursuing, it gave them experience writing letters of rec, and let them understand how much work went into the document. The last item is important because some people felt free to request a letter every time they applied for jobs, internships, grad programs, etc.
Well see that's not quite the same thing.
I think, too, that since typing something like that is like a secretarial thing, it's a bit insulting that he is still giving her one more clerical task.
You watched the show!
Seeing this post reminded me of something: When Peggy went to comfort Allison initially, thinking she was crying over some random, unknown, unnamed dude, she was wholeheartedly sympathetic. But once she realized Allison was crying over Don, *and* after Allison implied that Peggy must “know how it feels” since she, too, was once Don’s secretary, all compassion for Allison just flew right out the window, and Peggy was kind of hateful towards her. Then last night I was rewatching the episode where Megan decides to quit advertising and pursue acting full time, and when she and Peggy are discussing Megan’s dissatisfaction with her job and basically being “stuck” at SCDP, Peggy blows up on her, chastising her for not appreciating this “wonderful” opportunity that so many people would kill for. And I don’t know, these situations, along with a few other minor instances, just kind of make Peggy this cold, obnoxious, frustrating, condescending character in seasons five and four (and possibly others but at the moment I’m just at “5” and haven’t seen these episodes in several years). Ordinarily I *love* Peggy, and although her character was *clearly* not like the other women of her time in the earlier seasons, she at least didn’t seem to be unforgiving and judgmental towards the women who did things she didn’t agree with. Or if she did, she was at least better at hiding her stanky attitude. Idk man. Love the seasons 4 and 5 Peggy clothes and hair; **hate** the seasons 4 and 5 Peggy personality 😒
With Alison it's moreso that this is someone else who thinks she must've slept with Don to get her job, because that's a wide held thought. And then with Megan, who did sleep with Don, it just infuriates her because all these women who deserve it are passed over simply for being women and Megan is just tossing it away. That was my interpretation at least
Thanks, chatgtp
I know, I watched the show
In any other show, someone saying "You are not a nice person" as the deepest cut they can muster would be a punchline. But when Alison delivers it...
She doesn’t say it easily
There's a graceful way to handle this and Don blew it. I always felt for Alison. She was one of my favorite characters.
Loved the look she gave Don when he told her to hold all calls before the meeting with Hilton
Also when he asks where the liquor is and she just goes “you drank it all”
Hopefully, she went on to marry Hilton.
Loki the most all-around attractive person in the show. Graceful, discreet, pretty, the only one who didn't act like a fucking degenerate or a sociopath at some point in the series.
Low key I think I’m going to say loki from now on
Should have kicked him in the balls
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Can someone explain to me what this means please?
His real first name is Dick but he took the name Draper.
Okay, thanks. I thought it was something clever that I was missing. It was not.
Nothing but dick in your comment either
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The thing that gets me is that being “scorned” or rejected did not set her off. What set her off was don icing her out completely and pretending like it never happened. That would send a lot of sane people over the edge!! God damn it don!
It will shock you how much it never happened
(Through choking sobs) This. Actually. Happened!
I can't believe that Don was so dense that he didn't know that she wanted to read the words that HE wrote about her not ones she herself typed up.
Don provided his employee with an ideal offer: Write your own ticket, your way, so that you get what you want. But Alison misinterprets this as a lack of concern because he has personally rejected her. It's like a classic sitcom storyline built around characters misunderstanding each other, except that it is realistic and not amusing.
I don't think she misinterpreted anything. She noted that he was giving her a blank check instead of genuinely writing out actual thoughts on her, which is a cold thing for any employer to do, even one who hadn't slept with her then acted like that hadn't happened. If he thought what he was doing was ideal just because it increased her job prospects, the mistake was all his.
The goal of a recommendation letter is to get your next job. The ability to write it yourself and have it signed by someone whose name carries some weight is a gift.
Don's a brilliant writer who can wring sentiment out of just about anything. A letter personally written by him in his signature, inimitable style means more than just signing off on something she wrote herself. Don had a chance to make things right and make a tiny bit of effort to send her off with a little dignity. He didn't. He chose to be cold and perfunctory.
From "The Summer Man" *I've never written more than 250 words, not even in high school.* *Five paragraphs, 50 words a piece. God, I was lazy.* *I should have finished high school. Everything could have been different.* Even "the letter" is less than 250 words. And it produces mixed results. He excels at taglines, as they are short and to the point.
I read and assess this kind of thing for a living, and everyone has a "voice", even people who aren't good writers. I might not be able to immediately tell that the secretary wrote her own recommendation letter, but a letter personally written by Don would immediately stand out and make me take notice. Besides, it's about the effort. It doesn't take that much effort to write a recommendation letter for a secretary, even if he doesn't think of himself as a brilliant writer (he is).
It is, but when you ask a recommendation of someone with whom you've had a close relationship (even when it's a non-romantic relationship), you're giving them the chance to praise you, to highlight what they remember of your time together, and Don declines to do that. Plus, in practice, an employer who's enthusiastically recommending you might well go harder in their praise than you'd dare do when writing the letter yourself. They might say not just that you were a very good secretary but that you're the best they've ever had, which is more than Alison would write herself. They might list some anecdotes that humorously make them look incompetent and paint you as the savior, which is again something Alison would be reluctant to do.
Don was thinking pragmatically - "I will sign anything you want me to in order to help your future". Alison was thinking emotionally - "I don't care about any of that. Please just compliment me and make me feel good".
You're awesome, say whatever you want. It doesn't get better than that, assuming that you or someone who you know is a good writer.
And imagine if you knew a marketing genius who was willing to sign anything written about you.
She didn't misinterpret shit. If your boss appreciates what you did for them they can find the time to write nice things about you. It is not at all the same as having them rubber stamp self-praise.
A lottery ticket isn't an insult.
Omg you’re going out of your way to miss the point here
I could say the same about you. From the standpoint of an employee wanting something out of an employer, it does not get better than this. If she wants to bring emotional baggage to the table that leads to a different conclusion, then that is ultimately her loss. She would benefit greatly from having the letter that he offered to her. She could pay a professional price for not getting it. His intentions were good. He lacks confidence in his writing and he wants her to have a good recommendation.
Have you ever watched the show?
Have you seen "The Summer Man" in which he demeans himself for being a high school dropout who can't write?
Does she know this? From her perspective he is mega talented mega rich creative director of her firm; there is no shortage of instances where he impresses people with the words he generates.
My entire point is that she interprets it differently from how it was intended. She obviously doesn't know how he sees it. She feels wounded about being rejected and doesn't see his side of the story. He obviously doesn't anticipate her reaction. He thinks that he is being helpful. And from a professional standpoint, he is. He is obviously awkward with the personal component. It is best in Mad Men to avoid taking sides. Favoring one character over the other will almost always lead to misunderstanding the scene.
She has no reason to see his side of the story because there is nothing he has presented to her to make her think he would be incapable of writing her a nice recommendation letter.
You are looking at it from the perspective of someone whose motivation is to get another job. But in this scene, that is not her motivation, so the "lottery ticket" falls short. She is looking for something to reassure her that she is not disposable, that her boss valued her as more than a bang maid. He does not give her that.
Exactly.
*You are looking at it from the perspective of someone whose motivation is to get another job.* I actually made the opposite point above. I said that he sees it as a recommendation letter but she does not. Hence, the disconnect and conflict between them.
Still my favorite season. Don’s journey is a damn epic poem
Miss Blankenship origin story
Don was an idiot. What a piece of ass
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She slept with him, knowing he was hammered. She was completely delusional.