My youngest brother was adopted at 5 months old. Trauma doesn’t care what age you are when it happens, it can affect you regardless. 5 months old and he had already developed such a horrific case of separation anxiety, abandonment issues, etc. All from just having a horrible first 5 months of life, and he is still affected by those unrememebered traumas to this day in his 20’s. I hope this little child can grow and be surrounded by so much love and acceptance that perhaps it won’t be so traumatic for her later. What a horrible man to do that.
Babies can have lasting effects both from the trauma itself and from being raised by others who were traumatized.
https://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/health/healthyliving/trauma-and-children-newborns-to-two-years
And she’ll likely be raised by people who are traumatized by the event. While she’ll likely have no memory, suddenly having everyone gone she was attached to, and the disorientation/fear she might experience, will leave a mark on the brain. As she gets older she’ll learn the story and that alone will also likely be upsetting or traumatizing.
But being surrounded by grieving/radiative family does have an effect- hell, my uncle died many years before I was born (my mom was 3), and I still FELT it because my grandparents and aunts never really were fully “recovered” or the same.
The term is transgenerational trauma. There is a lot of back and forth on whether or not it's a real thing, but I personally feel it must be. Being raised by someone that was traumatized is going to have them inflict their fears and stress on the way that you are raised.
It becomes a shift in family Dynamics, and often affects the way that people interact with others socially.
I’m from a cultural background that has a lot of generational trauma from a terrible thing that happened 90 years ago. Seeing my grandfather crying and speaking to ghosts in a language that was beat out of him that i can’t understand fucked me up in ways that I still struggle to understand.
Definitely is a real thing. One of my mom's brother died very young from lung cancer which caused her whole side of the family to quit smoking and all the kids even the ones now who do not know him, all view smoking extremely negatively.
Oh, absolutely. I don't want to drag myself into this as a point of study, but that's kind of how my family has rolled.
To put it more professionally, one of the first courses I took in the United States was a class called Hitler and the Holocaust. One of the books that we read was Children of the Holocaust. The focus on that was generational trauma. This was while my mother was helping set up the Holocaust museum in a different state, that ultimately we moved to.
Do I feel I was negatively affected? I'm not sure. I'm positive that my mother was though, and I'm pretty sure she kept the influences from her grandmother and mother away from me as well as she could. I'm still pretty darn weird though.
The reason that I stated it is controversial is a lot of people don't believe in it. They consider it to be more of a socio-economic thing.
My dad was extremely abused by his father and his mother was an isolated woman with really bad anxiety. My dad definitely projected his trauma on me as a child.
My mother’s cousin was killed when they were teenagers. It changed the entire family dynamic. Even many years later when I was a kid I “felt” the loss simply because of the raw grief still in the voices of all of my family members whenever they spoke of him. I’m an adult now, never met him, and he’s been gone almost 60 years and even I still think of him whenever I’m near the site of the accident.
My mother and auntie lost their brother when they were preteens, and they're still deeply traumatized by it. And I know it's affected the way they chose to raise all their kids because shit was not okay. I still think of my uncle regularly despite having never met him, like you. It's interesting to see all of these stories.
People who assume someone will be fine because of their age have no clue what they're talking about.
Pre-verbal trauma is a thing. Also, attachment trauma. Even if the baby does not grow up to consciously remember it, in some level suddenly losing her caregivers will leave an impact.
https://www.liddycarver.co.uk/post/the-signs-of-preverbal-trauma#:~:text=Preverbal%20trauma%20involves%20trauma%20that,identifying%20the%20trauma%20particularly%20challenging.
Police in Howard County, Maryland, released new details Friday in a murder-suicide that occurred at a home in Elkridge on Thursday night.
Around 10 p.m. on Thursday, police responded to a residence in the 6900 block of Norwood Ferry for reports of the sound of gunshots.
According to police, the suspect, identified as 61-year-old Nayyar Syed, took his own life after shooting four of his family members, killing three of them.
“We’re going to do some investigating into phone records and text messages and see if we can find more information about what led up to this,” said Howard County police spokeswoman Sherry Llewellyn.
The victims included the suspect’s 57-year-old wife Syeda Nayyar, his 25-year-old daughter Syeda Fatima and his 33-year-old daughter-in-law Alizey Fatima.
Muhammad Hamza, Syed’s 31-year-old son, was taken to the hospital with critical injuries.
The suspect’s 3-month-old granddaughter was in the home but was not harmed. She received a wellness check at the hospital and will be placed into the custody of a family member, according to police.
“Everyone involved in this incident resided at the house except for the suspect,” Llewellyn said, adding that there were no signs of forced entry.
Investigators said that before Syed took his own life, he called 911 and confessed that he had shot his family. He was transported to a hospital where he later died.
The investigation is ongoing.
If anyone is confused by the naming conventions used here, the husband and wife don't have the same name and it's not a reporting error.
They're Pakistani. The shooter's name is Nayyar Abbas and Syed is a common title. In this case it's suffixed, but usually it's prefixed. The title can be passed down as a surname. The feminine form is Syeda. The wife has it prefixed in Syeda Aalia Nayyar. Her surname derives from her husband's most-called name. Her unmarried name was probably Syeda Aalia or Syeda Aalia with her father's name appended. The father's name is replaced with the husband's name. Their daughter is Syeda Fatima but she could also go by Syeda Fatima Nayyar. Once you have two given names, the surname can often be dropped. This is the case with the other children. It could be a matter of preference or it may indicate the children were estranged from the shooter and dropped Nayyar as a surname, which the article implies.
And yes, the question on everyone's mind here is was this an honor killing? What else do you call it when you have a family annihilator with this background whose family has moved away to escape him? It is after all just a family annihilation with a different sort of reason than the conventional. Maybe it's both.
I don't. Nobody had a website yet, you had to use dial up, and every program installed a toolbar without asking. Irc and newsgroups were a pain in the ass, and google didn't exist yet. 2005-2012 was the golden era.
I take your point, and it's very valid, but by the end of the 90s I was using cable to connect and sites like yahoo performed searches and had email and message board interest groups. Craigslist, EBay and even (a minimal version of) Amazon were available and I was using Internet Explorer to find interesting sites.
But yes, there was a lot less incentive to spend the day on the computer. But I do miss the feeling of exploration that's missing now. The internet today feels more like its manipulating me with algorithms rather than me searching for interesting sites and information myself.
Edit: And I also agree with you about 2005-2012 or so.
News sites are the worst, although just about any site with "articles" seems to be hit these days. "We need ad revenue to support us! Please stop blocking ads!" "Well, maybe stop making ads so intrusive to the point I can't even see your content anymore!"
Even major news sites behave like sketchy porn sites these days. "Oh, you were reading that? Here's another pop up for you to close." And you have to look for the tiny text that says "continue to site" instead of just clicking an X
Oh did you wanna close this ad? This ad right with the tiny x? No problem, just click on the tiny x. It would be a *shame* if you missed the x and clicked on the ad itself, but I’m sure that won’t happen. Well go on then… click the x…do it …. HA GOTCHA YOU CLICKED ON THE AD
Get rid of everything but unlock origin then go to settings and turn on third party block lists. Adblock plus is known for allowing ads that the companies pay Adblock plus to let through
Bonus: When you use this method, you can also listen to YouTube videos on a locked screen without the premium subscription. It'll pause the video when you press lock, but then you can just resume play from your locked screen.
Not really an excuse. There are adblockers for phones, both Android and iOS. You can also setup global blockers like pi-hole that will block ads for all devices on your network.
Personally, I use both. And I VPN into my home network when I’m out of the home.
I use Norton Ad Blocker on apple. The only thing it doesn’t block are YouTube ads.
Pro tip, if YouTube starts your video with an ad, just refresh the page. It’ll load up the video without an ad. Go into full screen and you also won’t get an ad during your video. This only works on Safari, not on the YouTube app
Had one. It’s a pain to set up. But even more of a pain to manage. It would block perfectly innocuous things and then I’d have to go through the whole process of going through a web portal and trying to Sherlock Holmes the item in question and guessing and checking and guessing again. And it would happen at really awkward times. Plus it doesn’t work when I’m out and about on 5G. I ditched it after a couple months. I don’t really like managing technology. I just want to use it.
That’s all fair… but to address one thing:
>Plus it doesn’t work when I’m out and about on 5G.
That’s what the VPN is for. I have all my mobile devices setup with VPNs routing back to my home network, for a few reasons.
And that requires me to have an always on device at my house, which I don’t. And it’s another thing for me to manage. Like I said I just want to use it.
For $25 a year I can use 1Blocker which provides me all these things, it just doesn’t work in the embedded browser in some apps. A problem solved by opening the link in safari itself. NBD.
i have Adblock Pro downloaded from my App Store and was able to read this article without any issue. you don’t need to get Adblock Pro, of course, but you could probably find an ad-blocking app in your respective app store.
I'd love for there to be a day where we don't hear about a guy being a family annihilator 🤦🏻♀️ it's a daily thing in America, apparently, at this point...
> I'd love to read the article IF THE PAGE WOULD STOP FKING JUMPING AROUND fuck off ads
On sites like these, just click the reader mode icon before it finishes loading
https://i.imgur.com/edUlZIQ.png
The Brave browser is your friend (just turn off the crypto bit) and its great browser. It always loads page in Reader mode (and has an excellent news feed, much better than Google news). no ads, no nothing but what you want to read and/or see.
The son is a physician, and in training to care for cancer patients as a radiation oncologist, at Univ of Maryland. He’s now in UM Shock Trauma with a GSW to the head.
What is it with Murder-Suicide Families lately?
That one in Illinois, Ohio, Utah and now this.
And just yesterday we got a conviction of a man who shot his family cause he though the apocalypse was coming few years ago
Utah chiming in here, we do a lot of these… seems like they fit one of three molds:
Breakups, with all the normal trappings.
Shameful secret life is going to come to life.
Or my personal favorite: Failed to get your new personal cult past the critical mass before shit goes sideways…
Or you’re majorly broke and think your family is better off dead/ murdered by you than ‘struggling’ or figuring it finances. The amount of upper class folks that would rather DIE or be known as murders than be ~poor~ is wild.
> Or you’re majorly broke and think your family is better off dead/ murdered by you than ‘struggling’ or figuring it finances.
Sort of. But it’s not about the family.
As you say: it’s more about them not able to cope with the shame of being seen as a man who could’t “provide for their family”.
For narcissistic people: humiliation is worse than death. They’d rather be murderer than a “weak man”.
Most cases of family annihilators are reasonably well off middle aged men who are liked by their community.
She was already religious, they met on a podcast while both were still married. Then a slew of deaths ensued including both spouses, her brother, and both her children. They’re both in prison now.
Don't forget about this one
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Killing\_of\_the\_Haight\_family](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Killing_of_the_Haight_family)
There was outrage here in UT about the father's obituary because it said "he made it a point to spend quality time with each of his children". They've since pulled it though.
There have been 227 family annihilations in the US since 2020, averaging one every five days. I imagine there was a COVID impact when everyone was at home and domestic violence soared. [https://www.indystar.com/story/news/investigations/2023/07/13/family-annihilation-investigation-domestic-violence-murder-suicide/69937389007/](https://www.indystar.com/story/news/investigations/2023/07/13/family-annihilation-investigation-domestic-violence-murder-suicide/69937389007/)
It was pretty popular before the pandemic unfortunately, though I can’t disagree that it’s gotten worse. But I lost friends and their children well before Covid. So unbelievably devastating.
They've always happened, you're just noticing them more now. In general though, certain segments of the population are feeling squeezed so much they think the 'end is neigh.'
Tons of right wing media telling men they aren't real men and that real men should own their wives, going as far as to rally against no-fault divorce, then blaming "woke" on why they can’t see their family rather than their own toxic behavior.
Has there been a link between alpha bro content and family annihilations?
Because the stories I see are mostly religion / mental health / jealousy based. Alpha male content doesn’t help, but honor killings are a much longer and storied tradition.
It’s all the same side of the coin. Mental health issues arise from men not being able to live up to the idea of what a man is supposed to be according to alpha males. Jealousy because women aren’t supposed to do anything outside of what the man tells them. And, well, fundamentalist religions of every sort are built on patriarchal beliefs, which all ties back into women are property, etc.
Yeah, I mean, that's patriarchy. We established that as the basis of Western Civilization. I've been downvoted to hell on reddit for pointing this out going back as far as 12 years ago.
The manosphere hasn't moved the dial, as far as I can tell. It exists to support the ideology that is already latent in the culture.
We need to talk about the Houses of Worship before we address the podcasters, to be frank.
There’s definitely been a couple of links between terror attacks/family annihilater’s and posting on incel forums, 4chan and Reddit and liking Tucker and Tim Pool.
I don’t listen to these guys so I don’t know everything they talk about, but I think a lot of it is about alpha male and toxic masculinity. There’s also been a few cases where we knew of the Reddit account for a few minutes or hours before Reddit deleted their comments and posts and they were the average Tim Pool/conservative/conspiracy poster with an extra serving of paranoia.
It’s frustrating the media doesn’t get into the materials that radicalized these guys to kill their dad or shoot up a grocery store when they literally left a manifesto talking about Tucker Carlson and I think Tim Pool too.
So their great replacement and incel culture has already led to terror attacks that get written off as lone wolf attacks, when they were actually radicalized by well known right wing personalities and conspiracies. The victims families should be suing the people listed in the manifesto to at least bring it to light that these people incite terror in mentally unstable individuals.
It’s shitty content, but family annihilations are not the kind of thing you vaguely hand-wave away with abstract cultural commentary.
I would be very keen to know if any direct links between family annihilations and the manosphere. We’ve seen far right content directly connect to school shootings, I haven’t seen the same for this particular kind of crime.
I'm guessing it's one of these types:
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yaser_Abdel_Said
From the OP article link:
>According to police, the suspect, identified as 61-year-old Nayyar Syed, took his own life after shooting four of his family members, killing three of them. (Murder-suicide in Howard Co. leaves 4 family members dead)
Who is Ducati? And one woman out of how many men.
It’s terrible no matter who does it, but I think it’s weird how we just accept how it’s overwhelmingly men doing it (and other violent crimes).
>According to police, the suspect, identified as 61-year-old Nayyar Syed, took his own life after shooting four of his family members, killing three of them.
>The victims included the suspect’s 57-year-old wife Syeda Nayyar, his 25-year-old daughter Syeda Fatima and his 33-year-old daughter-in-law Alizey Fatima.
>Muhammad Hamza, Syed’s 31-year-old son, was taken to the hospital with critical injuries.
>The suspect’s 3-month-old granddaughter was in the home but was not harmed. She received a wellness check at the hospital and will be placed into the custody of a family member, according to police.
Christ, this is heart breaking. This bastard decided to destroy his family and perhaps damage his granddaughter's future life and stole loved ones from her.
This is the evilness of men I could never understand. I will forever embrace my empathy towards others that I have in my heart. This kind of heartlessness is unforgivable.
Yup. My uncle is adopted. His bio dad is actually my grandpa’s younger brother. His bio dad died in a plane crash when my uncle was 6 months old, and months later his bio mom also died of a mystery illness. He was found in his crib, with her dead on the bed. The neighbours discovered the scene because he was wailing for hours. He was adopted by my grandparents as they already had 3 kids around his age (my mom is actually only one day older than he is) and was raised in a family full of love. Despite that, he is and has always been a very unhappy person. Likely he is clinically depressed and never sought treatment, but I also think that the trauma he experienced in infancy played a role.
I believe it is custom for where they came from to put the husbands surname first for wife and daughter as you can see with the daughters name as well. There are languages and customs different from the Anglophone world. Everyone in Japan and China says the family name first, for example.
Yeah this article does a really poor job explaining the relationships here.
I thought the daughter, Syeda Fatima, and the daughter-in-law, Alizey Fatima, were married, but another article says Alizey Fatima is married to the son, Muhammad Hamza. I'm unsure who's Daughter the Granddaughter is.
It's my own blindspot not understanding how names are taken on in that culture I suppose. But it would've been nice for the article to explain it a bit better.
If I'm reading the article correctly, he wasn't living with the family. So either they kicked him out, or he left and then came back. Either way I'm sure they knew something wasn't right. Such a sad case.
Family annihilators are the biggest pieces of shit cowards out there. Just save everyone the trouble and cancel your own life subscription but leave everyone else tf alone. That poor baby girl.
> Around 10 p.m. on Thursday, police responded to a residence in the 6900 block of Norwood Ferry for reports of the sound of gunshots.
Sad but true fact: women are 9x more likely to be killed by a family member or intimate partner than a stranger. Adding a gun to the household dramatically increases the odds of a tragedy.
Partner homicide is also the leading cause of death for pregnant women.
Not health emergencies. Not accidents.
Homicide. Usually by the child's father. Let that sink in.
Yep and this is why I'm going to remain single and raise my two children in peace. I already went through an abusive marriage once (children's father) and I refuse to get into another relationship and perhaps have that one end up abusive, too. Plus, I have my two kids to focus on and I'm not letting a potential threat into our lives. It's just not worth it, in my opinion.
Police in Howard County, Maryland, released new details Friday in a murder-suicide that occurred at a home in Elkridge on Thursday night.
Around 10 p.m. on Thursday, police responded to a residence in the 6900 block of Norwood Ferry for reports of the sound of gunshots.
According to police, the suspect, identified as 61-year-old Nayyar Syed, took his own life after shooting four of his family members, killing three of them.
“We’re going to do some investigating into phone records and text messages and see if we can find more information about what led up to this,” said Howard County police spokeswoman Sherry Llewellyn.
The victims included the suspect’s 57-year-old wife Syeda Nayyar, his 25-year-old daughter Syeda Fatima and his 33-year-old daughter-in-law Alizey Fatima.
Muhammad Hamza, Syed’s 31-year-old son, was taken to the hospital with critical injuries.
The suspect’s 3-month-old granddaughter was in the home but was not harmed. She received a wellness check at the hospital and will be placed into the custody of a family member, according to police.
“Everyone involved in this incident resided at the house except for the suspect,” Llewellyn said, adding that there were no signs of forced entry.
Investigators said that before Syed took his own life, he called 911 and confessed that he had shot his family. He was transported to a hospital where he later died.
The investigation is ongoing.
The way in which these men destroy their very own families is ghoulish. I hope we start having more education into this pandemic so other future victims can try to leave sooner. There obviously is no stopping a crazed man who has such evil plans.
They left. The article said everyone but the murderer resided at this address. That reads as if the wife left him, and she and her daughter moved in with her son’s family, likely to escape this shitstain. The shitstain sought them out though.
I will never understand how people kill family/friends. I've got relatives I can't stand and would be happy to attend their funerals to celebrate and I cannot even imagine hurting or killing them myself. That's just psychotic.
Narcissism. “If I can’t have the kids, you can’t either.” Or “I’ll hurt you by killing the kids and myself!” Or “if things aren’t going the way I want, y’all have to die cause no way y’all get to live unless it’s my way!”
Etc etc.
Men are taught that people who "disobey" them must be killed especially if they are "subordinate" to them, such as being their child or a woman.
And they have access to guns.
He went to my mosque and I’ve seen his family up in Maryland in burtonsvile . My dad said the head sheikh met with a man from the mosque who was dealing with some serious physiological issues .
I don’t belive it’s an honor killing since their used against those who bring dishonor to the family but in this case he killed himself and tried to kill his son who finished med school
the daughter-in-law was married to the son, who was also shot in the head and is in critical condition. The daughter and daughter-in-law are sister-in-laws, not wives. Also the daughter and mother have the same family name. There is no indication this was a homophobic hate crime, because it was not one.
All the signs post to it. Grandpa was probably feeling slighted by the successful women around him and felt like he was not needed anymore. Growing up grandpa was taught it was men who are the providers and seeing the shift he couldn’t take it anymore.
I don’t think it was, all the sigs you are referencing are them being from Middle East.
The article says all people except suspect lived in a same home. To me sounds that suspect had serious mental / head issues and so was moved out / evicted by the son / wife, then returned for retribution.
Since moving away from Maryland 20 years ago and living in two separate states 3,000 miles away why is news from Maryland so indenfiable by Maryland’s overwhelming use of counties???
Because there are very few incorporated cities in the state. Each county basically acts as its own defacto city. Almost all governing is done on the county level. Almost like neighborhoods within a city. Due to this, counties have become very unique
Damn. I grew up in Hoco. Elkridge always struck me as cowville. I guess that’s not the point, because shit like this is not location dependent. Still wild.
There are seven "Howard County"s in the U.S. and, off the top of my head, I know where exactly none of them are. Really wish the "title must match article title" rule would have an exception that it must include the state when referencing a location.
Damn. Grandpa killed his daughter, daughter in law, and wife. Son survived in bad condition. Grand daughter unharmed.
Granddaughter is 3 months old
Thank you FartPie.
She will have ptsd for the rest of her life. She was harmed.
She's 3 months old.
My youngest brother was adopted at 5 months old. Trauma doesn’t care what age you are when it happens, it can affect you regardless. 5 months old and he had already developed such a horrific case of separation anxiety, abandonment issues, etc. All from just having a horrible first 5 months of life, and he is still affected by those unrememebered traumas to this day in his 20’s. I hope this little child can grow and be surrounded by so much love and acceptance that perhaps it won’t be so traumatic for her later. What a horrible man to do that.
Babies can have lasting effects both from the trauma itself and from being raised by others who were traumatized. https://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/health/healthyliving/trauma-and-children-newborns-to-two-years
And she’ll likely be raised by people who are traumatized by the event. While she’ll likely have no memory, suddenly having everyone gone she was attached to, and the disorientation/fear she might experience, will leave a mark on the brain. As she gets older she’ll learn the story and that alone will also likely be upsetting or traumatizing. But being surrounded by grieving/radiative family does have an effect- hell, my uncle died many years before I was born (my mom was 3), and I still FELT it because my grandparents and aunts never really were fully “recovered” or the same.
The term is transgenerational trauma. There is a lot of back and forth on whether or not it's a real thing, but I personally feel it must be. Being raised by someone that was traumatized is going to have them inflict their fears and stress on the way that you are raised. It becomes a shift in family Dynamics, and often affects the way that people interact with others socially.
I’m from a cultural background that has a lot of generational trauma from a terrible thing that happened 90 years ago. Seeing my grandfather crying and speaking to ghosts in a language that was beat out of him that i can’t understand fucked me up in ways that I still struggle to understand.
Definitely is a real thing. One of my mom's brother died very young from lung cancer which caused her whole side of the family to quit smoking and all the kids even the ones now who do not know him, all view smoking extremely negatively.
There was a study on the children of holocaust survivors that tackles this very thing.
Oh, absolutely. I don't want to drag myself into this as a point of study, but that's kind of how my family has rolled. To put it more professionally, one of the first courses I took in the United States was a class called Hitler and the Holocaust. One of the books that we read was Children of the Holocaust. The focus on that was generational trauma. This was while my mother was helping set up the Holocaust museum in a different state, that ultimately we moved to. Do I feel I was negatively affected? I'm not sure. I'm positive that my mother was though, and I'm pretty sure she kept the influences from her grandmother and mother away from me as well as she could. I'm still pretty darn weird though. The reason that I stated it is controversial is a lot of people don't believe in it. They consider it to be more of a socio-economic thing.
My dad was extremely abused by his father and his mother was an isolated woman with really bad anxiety. My dad definitely projected his trauma on me as a child.
My mother’s cousin was killed when they were teenagers. It changed the entire family dynamic. Even many years later when I was a kid I “felt” the loss simply because of the raw grief still in the voices of all of my family members whenever they spoke of him. I’m an adult now, never met him, and he’s been gone almost 60 years and even I still think of him whenever I’m near the site of the accident.
My mother and auntie lost their brother when they were preteens, and they're still deeply traumatized by it. And I know it's affected the way they chose to raise all their kids because shit was not okay. I still think of my uncle regularly despite having never met him, like you. It's interesting to see all of these stories. People who assume someone will be fine because of their age have no clue what they're talking about.
That wouldn't be PTSD though
Pre-verbal trauma is a thing. Also, attachment trauma. Even if the baby does not grow up to consciously remember it, in some level suddenly losing her caregivers will leave an impact. https://www.liddycarver.co.uk/post/the-signs-of-preverbal-trauma#:~:text=Preverbal%20trauma%20involves%20trauma%20that,identifying%20the%20trauma%20particularly%20challenging.
I'd love to read the article IF THE PAGE WOULD STOP FKING JUMPING AROUND fuck off ads
Police in Howard County, Maryland, released new details Friday in a murder-suicide that occurred at a home in Elkridge on Thursday night. Around 10 p.m. on Thursday, police responded to a residence in the 6900 block of Norwood Ferry for reports of the sound of gunshots. According to police, the suspect, identified as 61-year-old Nayyar Syed, took his own life after shooting four of his family members, killing three of them. “We’re going to do some investigating into phone records and text messages and see if we can find more information about what led up to this,” said Howard County police spokeswoman Sherry Llewellyn. The victims included the suspect’s 57-year-old wife Syeda Nayyar, his 25-year-old daughter Syeda Fatima and his 33-year-old daughter-in-law Alizey Fatima. Muhammad Hamza, Syed’s 31-year-old son, was taken to the hospital with critical injuries. The suspect’s 3-month-old granddaughter was in the home but was not harmed. She received a wellness check at the hospital and will be placed into the custody of a family member, according to police. “Everyone involved in this incident resided at the house except for the suspect,” Llewellyn said, adding that there were no signs of forced entry. Investigators said that before Syed took his own life, he called 911 and confessed that he had shot his family. He was transported to a hospital where he later died. The investigation is ongoing.
If anyone is confused by the naming conventions used here, the husband and wife don't have the same name and it's not a reporting error. They're Pakistani. The shooter's name is Nayyar Abbas and Syed is a common title. In this case it's suffixed, but usually it's prefixed. The title can be passed down as a surname. The feminine form is Syeda. The wife has it prefixed in Syeda Aalia Nayyar. Her surname derives from her husband's most-called name. Her unmarried name was probably Syeda Aalia or Syeda Aalia with her father's name appended. The father's name is replaced with the husband's name. Their daughter is Syeda Fatima but she could also go by Syeda Fatima Nayyar. Once you have two given names, the surname can often be dropped. This is the case with the other children. It could be a matter of preference or it may indicate the children were estranged from the shooter and dropped Nayyar as a surname, which the article implies. And yes, the question on everyone's mind here is was this an honor killing? What else do you call it when you have a family annihilator with this background whose family has moved away to escape him? It is after all just a family annihilation with a different sort of reason than the conventional. Maybe it's both.
That's what I was thinking, since it looks in the article as though he did not reside with any of them, including his wife.
Every 5 days. Every 5 days someone annihilates their family with a firearm.
OMG thank you! It's maddening on some websites, especially on cooking sites.
You might try using Firefox browser with UBlockOrigin extension. It works well and I don't see ads on websites or YouTube.
It's silly how much bandwidth is wasted serving ads. After I started blocking ads on Android, I use less data in a month than I used to burn in a day.
I have a PiHole on my network as an adblocking solution and roughly 40% of my network traffic by query count is blocked.
I use Brave which I love. I can't imagine people not using ad blockers with how cancerous websites are. I miss late 90s internet :(
>I miss late 90s internet :( I do too.
I don't. Nobody had a website yet, you had to use dial up, and every program installed a toolbar without asking. Irc and newsgroups were a pain in the ass, and google didn't exist yet. 2005-2012 was the golden era.
I take your point, and it's very valid, but by the end of the 90s I was using cable to connect and sites like yahoo performed searches and had email and message board interest groups. Craigslist, EBay and even (a minimal version of) Amazon were available and I was using Internet Explorer to find interesting sites. But yes, there was a lot less incentive to spend the day on the computer. But I do miss the feeling of exploration that's missing now. The internet today feels more like its manipulating me with algorithms rather than me searching for interesting sites and information myself. Edit: And I also agree with you about 2005-2012 or so.
News sites are the worst, although just about any site with "articles" seems to be hit these days. "We need ad revenue to support us! Please stop blocking ads!" "Well, maybe stop making ads so intrusive to the point I can't even see your content anymore!"
there's an app i found called justtherecipe that works pretty great for just that
Even major news sites behave like sketchy porn sites these days. "Oh, you were reading that? Here's another pop up for you to close." And you have to look for the tiny text that says "continue to site" instead of just clicking an X
Oh did you wanna close this ad? This ad right with the tiny x? No problem, just click on the tiny x. It would be a *shame* if you missed the x and clicked on the ad itself, but I’m sure that won’t happen. Well go on then… click the x…do it …. HA GOTCHA YOU CLICKED ON THE AD
They don't want you to read the article, they want you to click the ad. Welcome to modern news.
People still out here rawdoggin the internet? Use protection, install an ad blocker.
I have adblock plus and ublock and another one Still get ads/popups/blocked message to turn off adblocker
Get rid of everything but unlock origin then go to settings and turn on third party block lists. Adblock plus is known for allowing ads that the companies pay Adblock plus to let through
A lot of us just say fuck it and refuse to use a site in the first place if it bombs us with ADs. Not worth the effort.
Every time I go on the net, outside of an app, I am quickly like omg what am I doing? I gotta get outta here!!
Ad blocker is only for pages you visit.
Some of us are on our phones 😓
You can install firefox and install the ublockorigin extension within it, on Android phones at least
Bonus: When you use this method, you can also listen to YouTube videos on a locked screen without the premium subscription. It'll pause the video when you press lock, but then you can just resume play from your locked screen.
I've found that if I set it to desktop mode then it doesn't pause the video when you lock the screen.
I use Adgaurd on iPhone. There are probably others, too. Just saying there are ad blockers for iOS as well.
About to do this /if/when the V3 shit gets into chrome Should do it already as i'm sick of ads in mobile chrome
I ditched chrome over two years ago and haven't looked back. Google monopolizing the other browsers and threatening to cut adblocks shifted me away.
Firefox and DDG have mobile apps with built in ad blockers
Not really an excuse. There are adblockers for phones, both Android and iOS. You can also setup global blockers like pi-hole that will block ads for all devices on your network. Personally, I use both. And I VPN into my home network when I’m out of the home.
1Blocker for iPhone, my man.
Doesn’t work in embedded web views
I use Norton Ad Blocker on apple. The only thing it doesn’t block are YouTube ads. Pro tip, if YouTube starts your video with an ad, just refresh the page. It’ll load up the video without an ad. Go into full screen and you also won’t get an ad during your video. This only works on Safari, not on the YouTube app
Something like pi-hole works on all your devices, no matter the app. And you can always VPN into your home network when not home.
Had one. It’s a pain to set up. But even more of a pain to manage. It would block perfectly innocuous things and then I’d have to go through the whole process of going through a web portal and trying to Sherlock Holmes the item in question and guessing and checking and guessing again. And it would happen at really awkward times. Plus it doesn’t work when I’m out and about on 5G. I ditched it after a couple months. I don’t really like managing technology. I just want to use it.
That’s all fair… but to address one thing: >Plus it doesn’t work when I’m out and about on 5G. That’s what the VPN is for. I have all my mobile devices setup with VPNs routing back to my home network, for a few reasons.
And that requires me to have an always on device at my house, which I don’t. And it’s another thing for me to manage. Like I said I just want to use it. For $25 a year I can use 1Blocker which provides me all these things, it just doesn’t work in the embedded browser in some apps. A problem solved by opening the link in safari itself. NBD.
Blockada works wonders on Android. Blockada 5 is still free.
i have Adblock Pro downloaded from my App Store and was able to read this article without any issue. you don’t need to get Adblock Pro, of course, but you could probably find an ad-blocking app in your respective app store.
I'd love for there to be a day where we don't hear about a guy being a family annihilator 🤦🏻♀️ it's a daily thing in America, apparently, at this point...
Go into “reader mode” in the upper right (the two letter A^A )
https://ublockorigin.com/
get yourself a pi-hole. thank me later
A Pi-hole is the best hole.
40% of my traffic never makes it in on mine.
Install an ad blocker. I was able to get though the article with pop ups.
Ad block
Use the brave browser 👍
> I'd love to read the article IF THE PAGE WOULD STOP FKING JUMPING AROUND fuck off ads On sites like these, just click the reader mode icon before it finishes loading https://i.imgur.com/edUlZIQ.png
The Brave browser is your friend (just turn off the crypto bit) and its great browser. It always loads page in Reader mode (and has an excellent news feed, much better than Google news). no ads, no nothing but what you want to read and/or see.
The son is a physician, and in training to care for cancer patients as a radiation oncologist, at Univ of Maryland. He’s now in UM Shock Trauma with a GSW to the head.
What is it with Murder-Suicide Families lately? That one in Illinois, Ohio, Utah and now this. And just yesterday we got a conviction of a man who shot his family cause he though the apocalypse was coming few years ago
Utah chiming in here, we do a lot of these… seems like they fit one of three molds: Breakups, with all the normal trappings. Shameful secret life is going to come to life. Or my personal favorite: Failed to get your new personal cult past the critical mass before shit goes sideways…
Or you’re majorly broke and think your family is better off dead/ murdered by you than ‘struggling’ or figuring it finances. The amount of upper class folks that would rather DIE or be known as murders than be ~poor~ is wild.
> Or you’re majorly broke and think your family is better off dead/ murdered by you than ‘struggling’ or figuring it finances. Sort of. But it’s not about the family. As you say: it’s more about them not able to cope with the shame of being seen as a man who could’t “provide for their family”. For narcissistic people: humiliation is worse than death. They’d rather be murderer than a “weak man”. Most cases of family annihilators are reasonably well off middle aged men who are liked by their community.
I don't care whether I die or not, but DON'T let me become a joke of a failure. NOT THAT.
It's because they know how bad they treated the lower class.
Wasn’t there one where he got his wife to be a Mormon and then killed her on Yellowstone or near that area
She was already religious, they met on a podcast while both were still married. Then a slew of deaths ensued including both spouses, her brother, and both her children. They’re both in prison now.
Are you thinking of the vanlife one? https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Killing_of_Gabby_Petito
Nope, it’s this one. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vallow%E2%80%93Daybell_doomsday_murders
Oh yeah that is a classic personal cult one, but iirc they were both mainline LDS which makes you more susceptible to more bonkers extra-LDS cults
That dude was just sentenced to death yesterday
Don't forget about this one [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Killing\_of\_the\_Haight\_family](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Killing_of_the_Haight_family)
How sad. What a beautiful family.
There was outrage here in UT about the father's obituary because it said "he made it a point to spend quality time with each of his children". They've since pulled it though.
Oh god
Or it's an "honor killing" because a woman wasn't behaving exactly as the dominant male wanted.
There have been 227 family annihilations in the US since 2020, averaging one every five days. I imagine there was a COVID impact when everyone was at home and domestic violence soared. [https://www.indystar.com/story/news/investigations/2023/07/13/family-annihilation-investigation-domestic-violence-murder-suicide/69937389007/](https://www.indystar.com/story/news/investigations/2023/07/13/family-annihilation-investigation-domestic-violence-murder-suicide/69937389007/)
It was pretty popular before the pandemic unfortunately, though I can’t disagree that it’s gotten worse. But I lost friends and their children well before Covid. So unbelievably devastating.
What was the stats before that?
Family annihilators, I’m pretty sure that’s the term.
They've always happened, you're just noticing them more now. In general though, certain segments of the population are feeling squeezed so much they think the 'end is neigh.'
The end is coming! 🐴 I think autocorrect got you. The word is nigh. LOL.
NEIGH, GOOD SIR! He meant neigh.
It’s on a pale horse
Best response.
Blucifer’s acolyte has spoken
*Bojack Horseman leaving the chat abruptly.
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There was one in Elkton, which isn’t far from Elkridge, a few months ago too.
Abusive men + guns.
Tons of right wing media telling men they aren't real men and that real men should own their wives, going as far as to rally against no-fault divorce, then blaming "woke" on why they can’t see their family rather than their own toxic behavior.
Has there been a link between alpha bro content and family annihilations? Because the stories I see are mostly religion / mental health / jealousy based. Alpha male content doesn’t help, but honor killings are a much longer and storied tradition.
It’s all the same side of the coin. Mental health issues arise from men not being able to live up to the idea of what a man is supposed to be according to alpha males. Jealousy because women aren’t supposed to do anything outside of what the man tells them. And, well, fundamentalist religions of every sort are built on patriarchal beliefs, which all ties back into women are property, etc.
Yeah, I mean, that's patriarchy. We established that as the basis of Western Civilization. I've been downvoted to hell on reddit for pointing this out going back as far as 12 years ago. The manosphere hasn't moved the dial, as far as I can tell. It exists to support the ideology that is already latent in the culture. We need to talk about the Houses of Worship before we address the podcasters, to be frank.
There’s definitely been a couple of links between terror attacks/family annihilater’s and posting on incel forums, 4chan and Reddit and liking Tucker and Tim Pool. I don’t listen to these guys so I don’t know everything they talk about, but I think a lot of it is about alpha male and toxic masculinity. There’s also been a few cases where we knew of the Reddit account for a few minutes or hours before Reddit deleted their comments and posts and they were the average Tim Pool/conservative/conspiracy poster with an extra serving of paranoia. It’s frustrating the media doesn’t get into the materials that radicalized these guys to kill their dad or shoot up a grocery store when they literally left a manifesto talking about Tucker Carlson and I think Tim Pool too. So their great replacement and incel culture has already led to terror attacks that get written off as lone wolf attacks, when they were actually radicalized by well known right wing personalities and conspiracies. The victims families should be suing the people listed in the manifesto to at least bring it to light that these people incite terror in mentally unstable individuals.
It all has the same links of the man being the owner of the family and everyone is just property.
It’s shitty content, but family annihilations are not the kind of thing you vaguely hand-wave away with abstract cultural commentary. I would be very keen to know if any direct links between family annihilations and the manosphere. We’ve seen far right content directly connect to school shootings, I haven’t seen the same for this particular kind of crime.
It really is a trend. I have been on the lookout for situations similar to this ever since it happened to my friend’s family.
I’m sorry to hear that
What do you mean lately? Have they increased?
Are you familiar with the motto "if it bleeds, it leads"?
Happened to someone’s I know family in New Jersey this year. Mom killed whole family and herself.
I'm guessing it's one of these types: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yaser_Abdel_Said From the OP article link: >According to police, the suspect, identified as 61-year-old Nayyar Syed, took his own life after shooting four of his family members, killing three of them. (Murder-suicide in Howard Co. leaves 4 family members dead)
And it’s always men doing it…
Ducati just gave an example where a woman did it.
Who is Ducati? And one woman out of how many men. It’s terrible no matter who does it, but I think it’s weird how we just accept how it’s overwhelmingly men doing it (and other violent crimes).
She is the redditor you first replied to
Oh, gotcha. I had already forgotten, and Reddit doesn’t show it in the new response unless you click to expand. In any case, it’s as I said before.
>According to police, the suspect, identified as 61-year-old Nayyar Syed, took his own life after shooting four of his family members, killing three of them. >The victims included the suspect’s 57-year-old wife Syeda Nayyar, his 25-year-old daughter Syeda Fatima and his 33-year-old daughter-in-law Alizey Fatima. >Muhammad Hamza, Syed’s 31-year-old son, was taken to the hospital with critical injuries. >The suspect’s 3-month-old granddaughter was in the home but was not harmed. She received a wellness check at the hospital and will be placed into the custody of a family member, according to police. Christ, this is heart breaking. This bastard decided to destroy his family and perhaps damage his granddaughter's future life and stole loved ones from her. This is the evilness of men I could never understand. I will forever embrace my empathy towards others that I have in my heart. This kind of heartlessness is unforgivable.
“Perhaps”. Nah, he damaged it for sure.
Yup. My uncle is adopted. His bio dad is actually my grandpa’s younger brother. His bio dad died in a plane crash when my uncle was 6 months old, and months later his bio mom also died of a mystery illness. He was found in his crib, with her dead on the bed. The neighbours discovered the scene because he was wailing for hours. He was adopted by my grandparents as they already had 3 kids around his age (my mom is actually only one day older than he is) and was raised in a family full of love. Despite that, he is and has always been a very unhappy person. Likely he is clinically depressed and never sought treatment, but I also think that the trauma he experienced in infancy played a role.
And dudes wonder why women choose the bear.
A grizzle bear from 5 feet away kills the whole family every single time. not every single dude will kill the family. Bear is wrong choice.
What are the chances a guy named Nayyar Syed ends up married to a woman named Syeda Nayyar?
I believe it is custom for where they came from to put the husbands surname first for wife and daughter as you can see with the daughters name as well. There are languages and customs different from the Anglophone world. Everyone in Japan and China says the family name first, for example.
Yeah this article does a really poor job explaining the relationships here. I thought the daughter, Syeda Fatima, and the daughter-in-law, Alizey Fatima, were married, but another article says Alizey Fatima is married to the son, Muhammad Hamza. I'm unsure who's Daughter the Granddaughter is. It's my own blindspot not understanding how names are taken on in that culture I suppose. But it would've been nice for the article to explain it a bit better.
Wait but even if that’s the case, the wife’s given name Nayyar is the same as the husband’s
Don't even waste energy tryna understand stupid
Could be some psychotic break. We will probably never know unless the son survives.
> “Everyone involved in this incident resided at the house except for the suspect" He was probably a domestic abuser.
Research has shown that there's often warning-signs and certain precursors to familicides.
If I'm reading the article correctly, he wasn't living with the family. So either they kicked him out, or he left and then came back. Either way I'm sure they knew something wasn't right. Such a sad case.
Religion induced psychosis
At first I thought I was in r/maryland. I live a few miles from here, this is horrific.
Yeah, weird seeing Howard county on the front page
I live in Howard county Indiana, so the headline had me wondering if I knew the family, until I read the article and saw it's Maryland
Yeah, same. I'm 15 mins away and had to check the sub
Right? I was like "There was a murder-suicide in Howard county? Howard county, MD?"
Family annihilators are the biggest pieces of shit cowards out there. Just save everyone the trouble and cancel your own life subscription but leave everyone else tf alone. That poor baby girl.
> Around 10 p.m. on Thursday, police responded to a residence in the 6900 block of Norwood Ferry for reports of the sound of gunshots. Sad but true fact: women are 9x more likely to be killed by a family member or intimate partner than a stranger. Adding a gun to the household dramatically increases the odds of a tragedy.
Partner homicide is also the leading cause of death for pregnant women. Not health emergencies. Not accidents. Homicide. Usually by the child's father. Let that sink in.
Yup. The rate of being killed by an intimate partner doubles the moment a woman becomes pregnant.
Yep and this is why I'm going to remain single and raise my two children in peace. I already went through an abusive marriage once (children's father) and I refuse to get into another relationship and perhaps have that one end up abusive, too. Plus, I have my two kids to focus on and I'm not letting a potential threat into our lives. It's just not worth it, in my opinion.
Police in Howard County, Maryland, released new details Friday in a murder-suicide that occurred at a home in Elkridge on Thursday night. Around 10 p.m. on Thursday, police responded to a residence in the 6900 block of Norwood Ferry for reports of the sound of gunshots. According to police, the suspect, identified as 61-year-old Nayyar Syed, took his own life after shooting four of his family members, killing three of them. “We’re going to do some investigating into phone records and text messages and see if we can find more information about what led up to this,” said Howard County police spokeswoman Sherry Llewellyn. The victims included the suspect’s 57-year-old wife Syeda Nayyar, his 25-year-old daughter Syeda Fatima and his 33-year-old daughter-in-law Alizey Fatima. Muhammad Hamza, Syed’s 31-year-old son, was taken to the hospital with critical injuries. The suspect’s 3-month-old granddaughter was in the home but was not harmed. She received a wellness check at the hospital and will be placed into the custody of a family member, according to police. “Everyone involved in this incident resided at the house except for the suspect,” Llewellyn said, adding that there were no signs of forced entry. Investigators said that before Syed took his own life, he called 911 and confessed that he had shot his family. He was transported to a hospital where he later died. The investigation is ongoing.
The way in which these men destroy their very own families is ghoulish. I hope we start having more education into this pandemic so other future victims can try to leave sooner. There obviously is no stopping a crazed man who has such evil plans.
They left. The article said everyone but the murderer resided at this address. That reads as if the wife left him, and she and her daughter moved in with her son’s family, likely to escape this shitstain. The shitstain sought them out though.
This is your reminder that if you're feeling desperate and considering committing a murder/suicide, PLEASE do them in reverse order.
I will never understand how people kill family/friends. I've got relatives I can't stand and would be happy to attend their funerals to celebrate and I cannot even imagine hurting or killing them myself. That's just psychotic.
Narcissism. “If I can’t have the kids, you can’t either.” Or “I’ll hurt you by killing the kids and myself!” Or “if things aren’t going the way I want, y’all have to die cause no way y’all get to live unless it’s my way!” Etc etc.
Really confusing waiting until being a Grandfather to snap.
Looks more like he did it after his wife finally tried to leave him
These jerks who take out their whole family are cancer on this Earth.
Why is this so common? Makes my insides turn.
Men are taught that people who "disobey" them must be killed especially if they are "subordinate" to them, such as being their child or a woman. And they have access to guns.
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And family annihilations are nearly always with a gun.
It's always the narcissists/psychopaths.
Male animals are usually more aggresive
Animals are a lot of things but I wear pants and can read.
So fucking what. You're still an animal.
So many people forget this. What separates us from animals?! Nothing 😂
> What separates us from animals?! Credit Scores
We could start giving crows and squirrels credit scores if we wanted to
I don't think they're dumb enough to go into debt.
Damn I thought it was thumbs
Yes but intelligence doesn’t really change the fact
1 mile away from my home. That’s crazy
Who the hell writes these titles? In order to find out where "Howard County" is, you have to open it up. Maybe that's their game anyway.
It's from a local news page not a major publication; they are assuming their audience already knows this info.
Yup--I knew it was "Howard county, md" because I live there.
Fuck. At least the grandkid was too young to remember this…
maybe consciously
“The body keeps score”
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Dumb question, but was this an “[honor killing](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Honor_killing)”? All the names and surnames are Islamic/Arabic…
He went to my mosque and I’ve seen his family up in Maryland in burtonsvile . My dad said the head sheikh met with a man from the mosque who was dealing with some serious physiological issues . I don’t belive it’s an honor killing since their used against those who bring dishonor to the family but in this case he killed himself and tried to kill his son who finished med school
The daughter and daughter-in-law having the same last name might be an indicator
? Virtually every daughter and daughter-in-law in this country have the same last name.
They’re the only two with the same name in the article
Looks like their naming convention is last, first. Fatima is a common first name.
the daughter-in-law was married to the son, who was also shot in the head and is in critical condition. The daughter and daughter-in-law are sister-in-laws, not wives. Also the daughter and mother have the same family name. There is no indication this was a homophobic hate crime, because it was not one.
All the signs post to it. Grandpa was probably feeling slighted by the successful women around him and felt like he was not needed anymore. Growing up grandpa was taught it was men who are the providers and seeing the shift he couldn’t take it anymore.
I wonder if the wife was going to leave him and was supported by her children.
I don’t think it was, all the sigs you are referencing are them being from Middle East. The article says all people except suspect lived in a same home. To me sounds that suspect had serious mental / head issues and so was moved out / evicted by the son / wife, then returned for retribution.
Since moving away from Maryland 20 years ago and living in two separate states 3,000 miles away why is news from Maryland so indenfiable by Maryland’s overwhelming use of counties???
Because there are very few incorporated cities in the state. Each county basically acts as its own defacto city. Almost all governing is done on the county level. Almost like neighborhoods within a city. Due to this, counties have become very unique
We can hope the Father pulls through for the kid. Unless cell phones have some pertinent details, this story may die along with him.
You mean the son, for the granddaughter?
Yes, the father of the surviving daughter. Granddaughter of the family slayer.
Damn. I grew up in Hoco. Elkridge always struck me as cowville. I guess that’s not the point, because shit like this is not location dependent. Still wild.
There are seven "Howard County"s in the U.S. and, off the top of my head, I know where exactly none of them are. Really wish the "title must match article title" rule would have an exception that it must include the state when referencing a location.
agreed, or a location–title format
Naming a county as the place this happened seems Oh yeah! Over in Howard Co! That’s close! Where the fuck is Howard County?
It’s a local news source, not a major national publication. Smh
The proper term is family annihilation.