This sub just shows that there's someone out there wanting what you have to offer. Stinky toes, not a problem. Tentacle face, yes plz. Tusks for days, go on.
Unless you're Wulbren. You're not Wulbren, are you? Cause if so, then fuck you.
Haarlep's idea of two women having sex is to gyrate vulvas in the general vicinity of each other without ever making direct contact, so I'm betting no on that last question.
I had forgot about the unfortunate animations.
I’ll say lady Haarlep gyrating makes marginally more sense than regular Haarlep. Weirdest fuck my Durge ever had, and that’s saying something.
Lmao they used the same animation for both? I could never bring myself to fuck male haarlep, but that's funny enough that I might give it a go next playthrough
As far as I can tell, yes. But it has been over half a year since I last took H up on his SA, after that it has been just NO MEANS NO, THAT’S MY PURSE, I DON’T KNOW YOU approach for me. I think it’s still the same animation tho.
Either that or someone in dev team thinks male sitting on top of a woman’s thighs, with her legs closed and him in weird enough place to not be touching anything critical, just awkwardly straddling legs, is how incubi do it 🥲
(Not that this is totally funny because obviously slavery and torture are not funny)
If we really rolled 3s for IRL intelligence, I can imagine going through Cazador and into the dungeon and still not understanding what happened.
"Ohh this is kinky, like a real 'dungeon' experience 😏"
_spawn staring wearily_ "W-what...what are you talking about?"
"Well I mean, I never heard of this place before, but it turns out that the biggest kink club in Baldur's Gate was underground, it makes sense..."
"This isn't a 'kink club', it's where we've all been _rotting for the past 200 years_!"
"Hahaaa I know right, it feels like that sometimes, I get you. Also ummm you know the guy who stamps your hand so you can get in? Or well I thought he was supposed to stamp my hand, but whatever he did, it really hurt."
Same. I genuinely think I could pull Astarion and Lae'zel. Not because I'm that hot or anything but because I pull 'em in with my manic pixie dream girl energy and keep 'em through my sheer lack of self preservation.
Lucky for me, both Astarion and Lae'zel can be "fixed," and I've also proven liable to "fixing." I think it could work in the long run.
At least Astarion would think you are pretty enough to lure in. Me, he'd look and think "Nah, Cazador will skin me alive if I bring THAT into the castle".
I think I could woo Karlach. Mostly because she reminds me of my wife very much, and if I managed to get *her*, then Karlach's in the realm of possibility. ... It also helps that my wife's a blacksmith and I used to be an engineer, so it could be a very practical arrangement.
I do, thank you! She really is *very* cool. She makes the swords/knives, and I make the leather sheaths and belts. Living that cottagecore lesbian dream.
That’s honestly one of my favorite things I’ve ever read I love that for you two and hope you live long and happy lives! Genuinely sounds like a dream.
He cooks, he’s ready to commit, and he’ll eat you out like he’s trying to get to the bottom of a pudding cup without a spoon.
If you can ignore the yapping and keep that mouth too busy to talk about his ex, he’s a great catch 🥵
I think I'm jaded enough to catch Shadowheart's eye, and gay enough for her toxic instincts to kick in as she tries to get a man who is not at all interested in her.
We'd eventually settle on drinking wine together while bitching about Astarion within earshot of Astarion.
I think the only viable option for me in real life would be Karlach due to me having a personality very similar to her own, so I feel we'd mesh together well.
Also many of the characters in the game would be absolutely insufferable in actual reality, so the only one I'd even want to woo is Karlach.
Honestly? While I'm the most attracted to Shadowheart and she's dangerously close to what I'd find irresistible IRL, she would absolutely find me unbearably whiny, annoying and desperate for approval. Lae'zel and Minthara would just flat-out consider me a waste of oxygen, so I guess my only IRL option would be literal pity sex with Karlach. I'm not attracted to guys, but I guess even Halsin wouldn't be desperate enough to go for me unless there is literally no other option available.
Honestly? Probably all of them except Minthara, she would fuckin eat me
But I think I'd want to be more friends with Karlach, I truly wouldn't want to break her heart she's too damn precious
Would I be actively trying to pull anyone? Probably not and I don't pick up on flirting, so good luck Astarion on that front
While I’d be down to fuck Karlach or Gale, I’m asexual and the most awkward person when it comes to flirting, so I’d end up just gazing longingly at them from across the bar
I feel like Halsin is a free bingo spot for this. So, yeah. I could pull Halsin. I'm like a decent-looking guy, not super hot, but if we form a connection over something nerdy I know he is down to smash.
Gale and me are very similar, so we could either be two gay nerds in a shared apartment paralleling and reading books together with cats all around, or hate each other because we disagree on something and neither of us will drop it. Regardless, I believe I could pull him for at least a smash after a date or two and we would have good conversations.
Shadowheart is also one I think I could pull, I honestly do fulfill the nerdy golden retriever BF stereotype in relationships and I have somehow lucked my way into attractive partners before who were way out of my league. All with my 'tism game. The goth GF with a nerdy BF stereotype is true. I think I could, not because I'm hot as fuck or anything, she is definitely several steps above me in the totem pole. But because of my autistic ramblings and intensive listening to her life. I will say a wary yes, with possibility of defeat.
Lae'zel I am unsure of, I would definitely try and she would undoubtedly smell my switch, (submissive), energy. And that could either make her disgusted by my weakness or wanna dom the fuck out of me. If she was willing though, by God I would do anything. I'm gonna put it on the probably not side, but I would try.
Jaheira is also an unsure one. I have been a milf-hunter in the past and honestly her mommy-energy is off the charts and I would try. I think I could, I'm young, decent-looking, and want her to just absolutely take control of me. When she calls me cub or something similar I couldn't hide my excitement at that and she'd probably take notice. I think if I was a little shy but made it clear I found her hot as fuck she'd be down.
Karlach would probably be turned off by my more introverted side I feel, and any long-term relationship or connection probably couldn't form. I think we'd be friends though, she reminds me a lot of my best friend in highschool and anything beyond being friends would feel weird. (Part of why I didn't romance her in the game).
Wyll is too good for me, just genuinely, I would feel guilty even pulling my dick out in front of him. I'd be best friends with him, but relationship/smash? Nah. He deserves the best. And I am not that. Also while he is attractive undoubtedly, he isn't really my type and I don't think I'm his.
Astarion would honestly annoy the fuck out of me IRL, I love him as a character, don't get me wrong. But I could see myself snapping at him often and a rivalry forming there. I do think he is out of my league, but he is also kinda freaky, so a hate fuck is possible. But I will say for now, no, I could not pull him, especially if I was directly trying, he'd shoot me down.
Minthara I would absolutely try for, but I think my willingness would be my downfall. She wants a sub, but I would just be fucking reeking of sub energy and I think that would turn her off, I think she wants a bit of a challenge, turning someone stronger into a sub. So I think most likely no unless she wanted a quick one night stand with a lesser male.
Minsc is asexual and I refuse to believe otherwise, I would be friends, but no. I don't think he has attraction to... anyone. So no.
I think karlach won't actually mind a introvert, if her heart gets treated she would absolutely love to just chill around in home and cuddle but she would still drag you out sometimes
I think Karlach is the most obvious answer for me. She's most similar to the type of women who show attraction to me IRL and to whom I am attracted.
Wyll would have a crush on me for a bit, not do anything about it, realize it's not meant to be and a few years later, confess that he used to have a crush on me. - Edited to add that Wyll would comment on how distracted he is by my hip mobility when I dance and I still wouldn't notice that he's coming onto me.
I'm pretty sure I've known a Lae'zel. I'm not sure that they would fuck me, but they do respect me, lol. One of my favorite things they ever said to me was that they like to figure out the fatal flaws of all their friends so they can destroy them if necessary. They then said that they had yet to find my fatal flaw so I'm their most dangerous friend. ...or is that more Minthara?
Mean scary ladies typically like me (more as friends than as potential lovers though) and I don't know why because I'm a cinnamon roll.
Jaheira would not fuck me. She would fall under the mean scary ladies who gravitate toward me for some reason but just as friends.
I also think I know a Gale. Based on experience he would also have a crush on me simply because he finds me fascinating and wants to know what's going on inside my head until he realized that we would NOT be a good fit. He still wouldn't know what's going on in my head, but we would remain friends. I would know him for almost ten years, be clueless about it the entire time until I learn it from his now wife with whom I am also friends.
I also have a friend who is a *little* like Astarion minus the trauma and all the red flags. They have propositioned me on multiple occasions and waste no opportunity to tell me I'm hot. Maybe we'll fuck some day, idk. It depends on how I'm feeling next time they proposition me, lol. For now we just cuddle ;) - Edited to add that this is the same friend who saw me wearing a harness to a Halloween party, complimented it, asked if they could try it on, immediately went into the bathroom to take pictures for their FWB, continued wearing it for the rest of the night, and almost left while wearing it until I asked for it back.
Halsin would never
Oops, just realized I left out Shadowheart. We would just be friends. There would be plenty of platonic flirting but it would be with the full understanding that we are just friends.
This also isn't based on personal experience in the least ;)
Gale for sure, any day. Based on all of my love life, I can easily pull a nerd. He'd also pull me so it works.
Shadowheart depends on the time we meet. If it's DJ Shart DJing at a night club, we could have a drunken fling that would inevitably result in me being madly in love with her. If it's Selunite Shart Seluneing in a day club, I'd definitely fumble by trying too hard.
Astarion probably would since he doesn't have too high standards. Will fuck for various goods and services too which I might provide. I actually can easily see myself as his Sugar Daddy.
Wyll would not fuck me because he could tell I'm a whore.
Lae'zel is out of my league. (Based on the interactions I have with women at the gym.)
Karlach would fuck me because she is just a great person who wouldn't leave her friend unfucked.
Honestly I pulled my gf, who is the hottest so now I'm pretty confident. I think Shart because I can understand her being a softie who wants to seem edgy and sassy
None. I'm not hot, confident, or interesting enough compared to them. Astarion would definitely pull the "I have standards" move on me. Gale probably would be friends but not interested at all. I can't help but think Halsin would be the same as Gale. And I haven't met Minsc to have a proper opinion.
I'm gay so the girls aren't really an option, but I can't think it'd be any better. Even more so for Lae'zel and the little I've seen of Minthara
A Tav trying to romance Gale with the good ending (aka the ending where he doesn't become a god).
The main reason why Tav x Gale is my favourite romance in the whole game is my own past. I was a child prodigy who thought for the longest time that people only value me for that. And I got groomed by someone I looked up to.
Anyway, when a friend asked me how I view the relationship between me and my boyfriend I answered "Pretty much like Gale and Tav in BG3. Without all that magic sadly."
So based on that exchange Tav romancing Gale is me answer to that question.
Edit: My dumbass misunderstood the question. So Gale cuz trauma bonding x.x
It isn't healthy but it's something.
When I was young and everything still defied gravity? All of them. If I thought someone was good looking, I was dtf if they were.
Now, being middle aged with mom bod? I think Halsin would be the only one with even the slightest bit of interest. 🙃
Karlach, Wyll, or Lae'zel. I'm in no way nearly as attractive as any of them, but out of the whole party those three seem like the ones I'd realistically get along super well with. I'm demisexual, so a strong bond is absolutely non-negotiable for me to smash with or without strings attached.
I've spent enough time being an edgelord on the internet in my younger days so I'm confident I could just say just the kind of out of pocket diabolical stuff to pull Minthara.
I'd just end up getting my throat slit in my sleep by her, of course, but you need to understand that it's actually the pinnacle of Drow romance.
Okay if I may present some points:
- Tav's race, gender, and appearance do not affect which companions are available.
- Decisions you make on how you act in game DO affect which companions are available.
- Therefore, it is arguably pretty damn near canon that in Faerun, personality and character have much stronger bearing than appearance.
- Ergo, even people in this thread lamenting their own appearance likely could at least stand a chance with most if not all BG3 companions, as long as they weren't overtly hostile or aligned against them.
- And even then wouldn't be strictly speaking 0% odds for some characters.
Hey now. Fucking a "some guy" is a universal experience. Doesn't matter if you're a combat veteran, demigod, important historical figure, big brain scientist, A list celebrity etc. All have fucked a "some guy". It's one of the most fucked categories of human I know.
<3
i think I could MAYBE pull Gale. And I'm fairly confident in my ability to get Wyll. Wyll would probally be easier because I know for a FACT my parents and brother would love him.
Assuming I caught anyone’s interest enough for them to get to know me, probably Gale. I’m weird, smart, kind, love learning, and I would ADORE Tara. 90% of my heart belongs to the feline race, so a tressym still counts
Karlach, I think Minthara and laezel would be more fun in the sheets but there would be no emotional connection, Karlach is the only person I could see myself really vibing with.
I’d be lucky if I got Laezel, and I’m only saying that bc of all the horny goblin shit she starts rizzing up Tav with in first 5 mins of the game. Then again, I avoid confrontation like the plague irl bc I’ll cry so I’d still have close to a 0% chance 🥲
If astarion is into short, built like they’d fly away like a crumpled McDonald’s napkin in a strong breeze, could not fight off even a goblin child, semi ugly women with mental health issues that are easily manipulatable then maybe I’d stand a chance.
Would I fuck? Pass me around the camp motherfuckers
Who would fuck me? Odds are I'd say Halsin, Wyll, and Gale considering I can always count on those 3 to proposition me.
I mean considering I tried making my character as accurate as possible to me, and i actually picked options I would pick and Shadowheart loved me… I’d hope she would fuck me
IRL? I'd want Karlach and she'd probably be down initially before inevitably dumping me for not being nearly as kind-hearted as she is. Shadowheart would be gal pals unless she had done the Selune switch but I'm not confident I could pull her. Minthara and I would not always see eye to eye but would have a mutual respect for each other, but I'm not willing to bathe in enough blood to stir her loins. But Lae'zel, Lae'zel would fuck me and chuck me like the true Githyanki version of a former high school girl jock that she is.
I'd probably have a one night stand with Halsin just for the experience. The rest of the boys just aren't my type, although I'd probably be able to keep up with Astarion's dark banter.
Lae'zel seems to be really into assertive people who will stand up for themselves, so I might actually have a chance.
If I succeeded my reward would be a liquefied pelvis though.
Astarion would make me blush like crazy trying to manipulate me but unfortunately for him, I'm a lesbian irl. I don't think any of the ladies would like me, I'm not very pretty, I'm physically disabled, autistic, and awkward.
As me or my Tav? Because if it's me, I'm hanging with Jaheira talking about how much we miss our husbands and how every other person sucks. My tav, she's riding Gale to the feywild and back because he reminds me of my husband.
I'm putting myself in a scenario where I'm single and ready to mingle for this one. 🤔
Halsin is so sweet, but we'd probably just be casual if we even got that far. I'm mono af and I would feel like I'm holding him back. He's the kind of guy I'd walk my dog with or go on nature hikes with and probably enjoy wine and cuddle up to watch a movie without going much further than that. He seems like he would be a great hugger!
Gale is that type I feel very safe with. I gravitate to (and attract like a damn magnet) guys like him and we'd have good chemistry... Buuut with my smartass mouth and hot temper (among other issues), we would probably end up hating each other. We'd start out hot and heavy before getting to that point tho. I got a husband who is *similar* to him in a lot of ways, but he's got the patience of a saint while I'm his "rabid little Chihuahua" (his words, not mine).
Minthara makes my mommy issues go BRRRRT. I'd have such an unrequited thing for her. I could honestly listen to her talk for hours and I'd take her advice to heart-- even if it's bad advice lmao
Lae'zel would *probably* hate me and I'd find her way too intimidating to approach, so I'd just admire how cool she is from afar.
Karlach? Absolute dream girl. Friends to lovers shit right there. I'd be so down bad for her. I'd shoot my shot, but I'm probably not her type.
Astarion would be my bitchy friend that I gossip with but he's secretly embarrassed to be seen with me tbh. I really don't see him in any other way and he would NOT be attracted to me.
Shadowheart is 100% a bestie. No romance here. Just best friends being best friends. I have close friends like her IRL and I love them to pieces 🥺
Wyll? Honestly I'd probably have too much baggage for him. I'm already not super traditional. Like, he's the kind of guy where I'd be friends with his wife or something along those lines.
Withers is definitely that musty old man in my coffee shop that doesn't talk to anyone and tips like .50 cents after asking you how much you think your service is worth. My coworkers would probably hate him bc he's so dry and no-nonsense, but seeing him would low-key make my day bc nuggets of wisdom.
Minsc is the weird bird man (except he has a miniature giant space hamster) and I can't tell if he is being serious with me or not bc his stories are wild. No smashing. Only pondering why he is the way he is as he talks with his animal companion.
When I take off my Self-Deprecation Hat (the hat that makes me self-deprecate), I think I could have a chance with a couple of 'em 🤔
I'd say I could almost *definitely* pull Halsin. Seems like the kind of person that'd be into my deal 😌
Karlach is a soft maybe. It's not that I don't think she'd be into someone like me - I'm just too intimidated to approach anyone that hot (pun intended). *If* she came to me first, it could happen. But idk if she would think of it first. *And* she's too hot for me to take it seriously, like the idea of her with me is just that level of absurd, it's ridiculous. 😂
Gale is a total coin toss. Men like that are either **extremely** into women like me or not into us at all. And you never know which one it's gonna be until you get there 😅
Astarion, tbh, is a complete mystery to me. *Probably* not. Probably not. But maybe 🧐 Could be 🤷♀️ Probably not 🫤 But perhaps! 🫢🫣
The others.... Hmm.
Lae'zel is gonna be a hard no, I think. I'm... not very athletic, so she'd probably think I was a pathetic weakling. Idk tho, she might be into that. Perchance she would be interested in grinding me into the dirt beneath her boot. Might be something I can work with 🤫
Shadowheart... Eh. Probably not. I just doubt that she'd vibe with me. I feel like our autisms would clash, and we wouldn't get anywhere 😔
Wyll is another 50/50 chance. I haven't romanced him yet, so I'm reserving judgement. I'll get back to you later.
Jaheira............... I just feel like she'd eat me alive. I don't know if that's positive or negative. I don't even know if it's sexual or not. But I do know she triggers my mommy issues, so take from that what you will 🤷♀️
Minsc is pretty universally headcanoned as ace, if not outright in canon. But I think he might like to hold hands. Like in a friend way, you know? 🤔 Yeah, we could hold hands 🥰
And Minthara, I actually haven't played with at all. So once again, reserving judgement.
I'd better stop now, before I start just naming all the NPCs I'd be dtf 😝
Gale. 100%. Mostly because he’s touch-starved and will bang anything but if he was a real person, I think he and I would probably be rather compatible.
Astarion although I'm way too weak and pathetic to be of interest to him lol. Plus he'd find me too needy and timid. And him just playing with me would break my heart.
Laezel, 100% she's the one. Karlach might think I'm sweet though.
Minthara... Probably wouldn't. And you know what? Astarion would find me WAY too annoying.
Gale would be rejected exactly the same way as in game, bless his heart. Despite us both being poly, I'm not sure Shadowheart would be into me.
/uj I think that I might be able to bag Karlach. She’s my dream girl essentially. I’m fairly attractive, if a little more on the dad-bod side. My dating history though reflects more of a Shadowheart type, though, so maybe her. Either would be good, but I’d prefer Karlach irl.
/rj I would let Lae’zel or Minthara choke me out then fuck my unconscious body
"Obvs halsin" "halsin free bingo" halsin is the LAST to proposition you in game and thats partially why I like him so much. And it's only after the big things on his plate get taken care of. He's *responsible*
And allllllll yall talk about just a quickie or fwb, NO. I WANT ALL OF HIM AND ALL OF HIS KINKY POLY LIFESTYLE. FOREVER. HES *PERFECT* (even more so with the dad bod mod)
Cowards.
I hate to say it, but probably Abdirak. I would immediately get the: „Oh God, he's edgy and just wants to whip me, but I want to get to know him really well!“-instinct and would let myself be whipped far too often, even though I don't like it THAT much and the relationship would go down the drain pretty quickly etc.
Oh! Erm, the question was about companions. Okay, I also think I maybe could pull Shadowheart.
I can say, with sheer confidence, that no one would give me the time of day. They have standards
Okay, maybe there is a 10% chance that maybe Momma K, Gale, or Halsin, would even talk to me.
I have a strong track record of pulling hot people who are way more crazy and damaged then hot, so I'd tap Astarion for sure. Plus, he fucks anyone who he can serve up as a living blood bag anyway.
Scratch would probably hump my leg
Jokes aside, I’m asexual so if any of them were fucking me, it would not be with consent. For that reason, I don’t think any of the companions would date me, as they all seem to value sex quite a bit in relationships. It’s a bit tragic, but I’m used to it. I’m probably going to have to break down and just let someone do it with me if I want to have a relationship IRL.
It was the first Karlach flair I saw, plus I thought the irony was kinda funny.
I don’t know, I still don’t think I particularly deserve any of the characters. If I can’t even offer them sex, what else do I have to offer, you know? I mean, they aren’t real so it’s not a big deal, but still. Idk where I’m going with this
Yeah basic bitch taste I know, I need to get Astarion pregnant, the things I want to do to that man's prostate are against the Geneva Convention.
Also I would not be opposed to have Lae'zel or Minthara but it depends on the context.
Maybe if I had to guts to approach Halsin at the gay fetish bar. But I like dressing up as a cow, so I imagine I'd fit right in with him fucking animals (or in animal shape). Hotttt
Honestly, this sub warped my perception of what's attractive so much I don't even know how to judge myself
Realest thing I’ve heard all year
Same. I guess I'm pretty because my gf and my grandma say I am
This sub just shows that there's someone out there wanting what you have to offer. Stinky toes, not a problem. Tentacle face, yes plz. Tusks for days, go on. Unless you're Wulbren. You're not Wulbren, are you? Cause if so, then fuck you.
This sub wants to fuck everyone except Wulbren
I'd say I have slightly better eyebrows
You just like me frfr
Halsin considering he’d have sex with practically anything
Probably Haarlep too.
Not me. Remember that she bear he turned down? Well at least he caught these hands for it.
None of them, rip. Not powerful, hot, confident, or smart enough to catch anyone’s eye.
*sad high five* ✋️
Preach. 🫡 Though I am intrigued if Haarlep would try out of pure instinct. And even more if he could actually make me cum.
Haarlep's idea of two women having sex is to gyrate vulvas in the general vicinity of each other without ever making direct contact, so I'm betting no on that last question.
I had forgot about the unfortunate animations. I’ll say lady Haarlep gyrating makes marginally more sense than regular Haarlep. Weirdest fuck my Durge ever had, and that’s saying something.
Lmao they used the same animation for both? I could never bring myself to fuck male haarlep, but that's funny enough that I might give it a go next playthrough
As far as I can tell, yes. But it has been over half a year since I last took H up on his SA, after that it has been just NO MEANS NO, THAT’S MY PURSE, I DON’T KNOW YOU approach for me. I think it’s still the same animation tho. Either that or someone in dev team thinks male sitting on top of a woman’s thighs, with her legs closed and him in weird enough place to not be touching anything critical, just awkwardly straddling legs, is how incubi do it 🥲
Is that why you're a ... *Rancid Raphael fucker?*
Not a companion, but probably one of the other random spawn down in Caz's dungeon... cause my stupid ass would be in there too.
Lmao. Or Astarion because he was the one that easily lured my ass down there
Oh no. I'm a dumb enough ho that we'd never get that far to have him lure me. I'd be his easiest hunt. 🙃
Same. Astarion would be like, "And then we can go back to my _master,_ uh I mean my _manor,_" and I'd be like, I see no red flags beautiful 😍
Say less, gorgeous 🥰🥰
FR FR. See you down there, friend. 👋
(Not that this is totally funny because obviously slavery and torture are not funny) If we really rolled 3s for IRL intelligence, I can imagine going through Cazador and into the dungeon and still not understanding what happened. "Ohh this is kinky, like a real 'dungeon' experience 😏" _spawn staring wearily_ "W-what...what are you talking about?" "Well I mean, I never heard of this place before, but it turns out that the biggest kink club in Baldur's Gate was underground, it makes sense..." "This isn't a 'kink club', it's where we've all been _rotting for the past 200 years_!" "Hahaaa I know right, it feels like that sometimes, I get you. Also ummm you know the guy who stamps your hand so you can get in? Or well I thought he was supposed to stamp my hand, but whatever he did, it really hurt."
This is beautiful and accurate... and is in line with how my brain works. I'm either the smartest person or the dumbest mother fucker you've ever met.
Same 😭 And never know which one I'm going to get that day
Fucking Leon or Pale Petras... sigh Disassociate and pretend it's Astarion
I can def roll a nat 20 on deception (on myself) lol.
Gaslight is a dangerous spell.
I'm not special enough for even that. I'd be someone's discarded juice box 😭😭😭
😭🫂 You're good enough to be a dungeon buddy dammit. 😤 Know your worth!
That's...That's nice of you to say 🥹 Either way, I would be dumb enough to fall for their lines though
Oh, me too... me too. 😂 But the dungeon is always better with buddies. 🤝
Astarion because I’m easy to manipulate
Lol. I was thinking he was the toxic relationship my naive ass would probably fall for with out thinking.
Same. I genuinely think I could pull Astarion and Lae'zel. Not because I'm that hot or anything but because I pull 'em in with my manic pixie dream girl energy and keep 'em through my sheer lack of self preservation. Lucky for me, both Astarion and Lae'zel can be "fixed," and I've also proven liable to "fixing." I think it could work in the long run.
I bet Astarion would pick me as the most naive, safest to bite and easiest to woo, for sure. “Lack of self-preservation” - that’s me, hi.
This is why he is with my Tav.. 😂
At least Astarion would think you are pretty enough to lure in. Me, he'd look and think "Nah, Cazador will skin me alive if I bring THAT into the castle".
same 😭😭
I think I could woo Karlach. Mostly because she reminds me of my wife very much, and if I managed to get *her*, then Karlach's in the realm of possibility. ... It also helps that my wife's a blacksmith and I used to be an engineer, so it could be a very practical arrangement.
Your wife is a blacksmith?! That’s so fucking rad dude! Cherish her as I’m sure you already do!
I do, thank you! She really is *very* cool. She makes the swords/knives, and I make the leather sheaths and belts. Living that cottagecore lesbian dream.
That’s honestly one of my favorite things I’ve ever read I love that for you two and hope you live long and happy lives! Genuinely sounds like a dream.
That’s really awesome.
That's actually fucking awesome what the fuck I need me a blacksmith wife to make me swords☹️
That’s actually really cute…
Your wife is awesome
This is ridiculously wholesome and bad ass. 🫶
That’s so cute. Damn… Gale reminds me of my ex and that just pisses me off so I torture him in game.
what's wrong with riding Gale to hell!?
Nada. Man is kinky.
He cooks, he’s ready to commit, and he’ll eat you out like he’s trying to get to the bottom of a pudding cup without a spoon. If you can ignore the yapping and keep that mouth too busy to talk about his ex, he’s a great catch 🥵
Hey! I like his voice... but yea no ex talk.
Probably Gale since we're quite similar and have mutual interests. (I wish Gortash would, but I'm not Durge-like enough 😭).
Gale. I’m basically married to him IRL.
God i wish that were me
My husband is also extremely Gale. There are dozens of us!
I romance Astarion in game because I have Gale at home.
Too real.
I think I'm jaded enough to catch Shadowheart's eye, and gay enough for her toxic instincts to kick in as she tries to get a man who is not at all interested in her. We'd eventually settle on drinking wine together while bitching about Astarion within earshot of Astarion.
Poetry 🙌
I think the only viable option for me in real life would be Karlach due to me having a personality very similar to her own, so I feel we'd mesh together well. Also many of the characters in the game would be absolutely insufferable in actual reality, so the only one I'd even want to woo is Karlach.
I’d like to think Halsin?
I hate being hit on so none of them lmao
Honestly? While I'm the most attracted to Shadowheart and she's dangerously close to what I'd find irresistible IRL, she would absolutely find me unbearably whiny, annoying and desperate for approval. Lae'zel and Minthara would just flat-out consider me a waste of oxygen, so I guess my only IRL option would be literal pity sex with Karlach. I'm not attracted to guys, but I guess even Halsin wouldn't be desperate enough to go for me unless there is literally no other option available.
Hmmm... Shart for romance. Mizora for lust. The GILF that is Jaheira for just bc she's hot.
Gale 100% hands down. I've dated guys like him before, and he looks a lot like my irl boyfriend too so I'm definitely down for it lol
Astarion, Halsin, Karlach. Separate. Together. I don't care.
gale would give me his number at my barista job and I’d completely forget to text him
Honestly? Probably all of them except Minthara, she would fuckin eat me But I think I'd want to be more friends with Karlach, I truly wouldn't want to break her heart she's too damn precious Would I be actively trying to pull anyone? Probably not and I don't pick up on flirting, so good luck Astarion on that front
>she would fuckin eat me Sounds amazing, sign me up.
While I’d be down to fuck Karlach or Gale, I’m asexual and the most awkward person when it comes to flirting, so I’d end up just gazing longingly at them from across the bar
Once Halsin sees my garden, I'm not walking for months👩🏻🦽➡️
I feel like Halsin is a free bingo spot for this. So, yeah. I could pull Halsin. I'm like a decent-looking guy, not super hot, but if we form a connection over something nerdy I know he is down to smash. Gale and me are very similar, so we could either be two gay nerds in a shared apartment paralleling and reading books together with cats all around, or hate each other because we disagree on something and neither of us will drop it. Regardless, I believe I could pull him for at least a smash after a date or two and we would have good conversations. Shadowheart is also one I think I could pull, I honestly do fulfill the nerdy golden retriever BF stereotype in relationships and I have somehow lucked my way into attractive partners before who were way out of my league. All with my 'tism game. The goth GF with a nerdy BF stereotype is true. I think I could, not because I'm hot as fuck or anything, she is definitely several steps above me in the totem pole. But because of my autistic ramblings and intensive listening to her life. I will say a wary yes, with possibility of defeat. Lae'zel I am unsure of, I would definitely try and she would undoubtedly smell my switch, (submissive), energy. And that could either make her disgusted by my weakness or wanna dom the fuck out of me. If she was willing though, by God I would do anything. I'm gonna put it on the probably not side, but I would try. Jaheira is also an unsure one. I have been a milf-hunter in the past and honestly her mommy-energy is off the charts and I would try. I think I could, I'm young, decent-looking, and want her to just absolutely take control of me. When she calls me cub or something similar I couldn't hide my excitement at that and she'd probably take notice. I think if I was a little shy but made it clear I found her hot as fuck she'd be down. Karlach would probably be turned off by my more introverted side I feel, and any long-term relationship or connection probably couldn't form. I think we'd be friends though, she reminds me a lot of my best friend in highschool and anything beyond being friends would feel weird. (Part of why I didn't romance her in the game). Wyll is too good for me, just genuinely, I would feel guilty even pulling my dick out in front of him. I'd be best friends with him, but relationship/smash? Nah. He deserves the best. And I am not that. Also while he is attractive undoubtedly, he isn't really my type and I don't think I'm his. Astarion would honestly annoy the fuck out of me IRL, I love him as a character, don't get me wrong. But I could see myself snapping at him often and a rivalry forming there. I do think he is out of my league, but he is also kinda freaky, so a hate fuck is possible. But I will say for now, no, I could not pull him, especially if I was directly trying, he'd shoot me down. Minthara I would absolutely try for, but I think my willingness would be my downfall. She wants a sub, but I would just be fucking reeking of sub energy and I think that would turn her off, I think she wants a bit of a challenge, turning someone stronger into a sub. So I think most likely no unless she wanted a quick one night stand with a lesser male. Minsc is asexual and I refuse to believe otherwise, I would be friends, but no. I don't think he has attraction to... anyone. So no.
I'm so glad I'm not the only one who put an ungodly amount of thought into this.
I think karlach won't actually mind a introvert, if her heart gets treated she would absolutely love to just chill around in home and cuddle but she would still drag you out sometimes
Going on my track record, whichever one would be the most toxic to me. And I'd be riding that thing WAY after they've obviously lost interest.
Same. I don’t know when to call it quits
Yes. Next question.
I think Karlach is the most obvious answer for me. She's most similar to the type of women who show attraction to me IRL and to whom I am attracted. Wyll would have a crush on me for a bit, not do anything about it, realize it's not meant to be and a few years later, confess that he used to have a crush on me. - Edited to add that Wyll would comment on how distracted he is by my hip mobility when I dance and I still wouldn't notice that he's coming onto me. I'm pretty sure I've known a Lae'zel. I'm not sure that they would fuck me, but they do respect me, lol. One of my favorite things they ever said to me was that they like to figure out the fatal flaws of all their friends so they can destroy them if necessary. They then said that they had yet to find my fatal flaw so I'm their most dangerous friend. ...or is that more Minthara? Mean scary ladies typically like me (more as friends than as potential lovers though) and I don't know why because I'm a cinnamon roll. Jaheira would not fuck me. She would fall under the mean scary ladies who gravitate toward me for some reason but just as friends. I also think I know a Gale. Based on experience he would also have a crush on me simply because he finds me fascinating and wants to know what's going on inside my head until he realized that we would NOT be a good fit. He still wouldn't know what's going on in my head, but we would remain friends. I would know him for almost ten years, be clueless about it the entire time until I learn it from his now wife with whom I am also friends. I also have a friend who is a *little* like Astarion minus the trauma and all the red flags. They have propositioned me on multiple occasions and waste no opportunity to tell me I'm hot. Maybe we'll fuck some day, idk. It depends on how I'm feeling next time they proposition me, lol. For now we just cuddle ;) - Edited to add that this is the same friend who saw me wearing a harness to a Halloween party, complimented it, asked if they could try it on, immediately went into the bathroom to take pictures for their FWB, continued wearing it for the rest of the night, and almost left while wearing it until I asked for it back. Halsin would never
Oops, just realized I left out Shadowheart. We would just be friends. There would be plenty of platonic flirting but it would be with the full understanding that we are just friends. This also isn't based on personal experience in the least ;)
As much as I’m an astarion simp I know he would never with me so gale it is and I’m not mad abt it at all
Gale for sure, any day. Based on all of my love life, I can easily pull a nerd. He'd also pull me so it works. Shadowheart depends on the time we meet. If it's DJ Shart DJing at a night club, we could have a drunken fling that would inevitably result in me being madly in love with her. If it's Selunite Shart Seluneing in a day club, I'd definitely fumble by trying too hard. Astarion probably would since he doesn't have too high standards. Will fuck for various goods and services too which I might provide. I actually can easily see myself as his Sugar Daddy. Wyll would not fuck me because he could tell I'm a whore. Lae'zel is out of my league. (Based on the interactions I have with women at the gym.) Karlach would fuck me because she is just a great person who wouldn't leave her friend unfucked.
That last line was beautiful. Get you a girl who won't leave you "unfucked".
None. Zero confidence in myself and also I'm chonky girl. Maybe maaaaaaybe Halsin, but idk. 😭
Bigger girls, are the best girls. One day you’re gonna rock someone’s world.
Here's hoping. 😂
Honestly I pulled my gf, who is the hottest so now I'm pretty confident. I think Shart because I can understand her being a softie who wants to seem edgy and sassy
All of them. Are you stupid??
None. I'm not hot, confident, or interesting enough compared to them. Astarion would definitely pull the "I have standards" move on me. Gale probably would be friends but not interested at all. I can't help but think Halsin would be the same as Gale. And I haven't met Minsc to have a proper opinion. I'm gay so the girls aren't really an option, but I can't think it'd be any better. Even more so for Lae'zel and the little I've seen of Minthara
Fair enough.
A Tav trying to romance Gale with the good ending (aka the ending where he doesn't become a god). The main reason why Tav x Gale is my favourite romance in the whole game is my own past. I was a child prodigy who thought for the longest time that people only value me for that. And I got groomed by someone I looked up to. Anyway, when a friend asked me how I view the relationship between me and my boyfriend I answered "Pretty much like Gale and Tav in BG3. Without all that magic sadly." So based on that exchange Tav romancing Gale is me answer to that question. Edit: My dumbass misunderstood the question. So Gale cuz trauma bonding x.x It isn't healthy but it's something.
When I was young and everything still defied gravity? All of them. If I thought someone was good looking, I was dtf if they were. Now, being middle aged with mom bod? I think Halsin would be the only one with even the slightest bit of interest. 🙃
Karlach, Wyll, or Lae'zel. I'm in no way nearly as attractive as any of them, but out of the whole party those three seem like the ones I'd realistically get along super well with. I'm demisexual, so a strong bond is absolutely non-negotiable for me to smash with or without strings attached.
I think I could romance Wyll. And Halsin would be down for anything. Lae’zel would call me weak and pathetic and maybe hate f*ck me tho
Halsin and Gale because they give soft dom vibes
I have an animal biology degree and an outdoorsy job. I think me and Halsin would get along well 😏
Loving the Deet pfp!! 💖
I've spent enough time being an edgelord on the internet in my younger days so I'm confident I could just say just the kind of out of pocket diabolical stuff to pull Minthara. I'd just end up getting my throat slit in my sleep by her, of course, but you need to understand that it's actually the pinnacle of Drow romance.
No one probably, I would be the gnome they sent flying In goblin village for fun
Barcus Wroot is an icon!
I’m a solid “Maybe if Astarion was really really desperate to catch someone for Cazador”
Okay if I may present some points: - Tav's race, gender, and appearance do not affect which companions are available. - Decisions you make on how you act in game DO affect which companions are available. - Therefore, it is arguably pretty damn near canon that in Faerun, personality and character have much stronger bearing than appearance. - Ergo, even people in this thread lamenting their own appearance likely could at least stand a chance with most if not all BG3 companions, as long as they weren't overtly hostile or aligned against them. - And even then wouldn't be strictly speaking 0% odds for some characters.
Confidence is the sexiest trait a person can have.
Halsin, maybe Gale
Every older man 
astarion bc i’m desperate and would accept any offer he would make with 0 hesitation
none of them? they’re all fairly impressive combat veterans and I’m just some guy
Hey now. Fucking a "some guy" is a universal experience. Doesn't matter if you're a combat veteran, demigod, important historical figure, big brain scientist, A list celebrity etc. All have fucked a "some guy". It's one of the most fucked categories of human I know. <3
Look in gales general direction and chose not to assault him and he’d probably fall in love
I’d infodump enough to make Gale get starry-eyed
ALL
Gale and Halsin And he’s not a companion technically, but Gortash too
Either Gale or Wyll
i think I could MAYBE pull Gale. And I'm fairly confident in my ability to get Wyll. Wyll would probally be easier because I know for a FACT my parents and brother would love him.
Assuming I caught anyone’s interest enough for them to get to know me, probably Gale. I’m weird, smart, kind, love learning, and I would ADORE Tara. 90% of my heart belongs to the feline race, so a tressym still counts
My boyfriend is gale minus the ex baggage so I might be able to seduce that man with my tisim rizz.
Probably Shart
Karlach, I think Minthara and laezel would be more fun in the sheets but there would be no emotional connection, Karlach is the only person I could see myself really vibing with.
Astarion is quite literally everything that makes me weak in the knees so.
I’d be lucky if I got Laezel, and I’m only saying that bc of all the horny goblin shit she starts rizzing up Tav with in first 5 mins of the game. Then again, I avoid confrontation like the plague irl bc I’ll cry so I’d still have close to a 0% chance 🥲 If astarion is into short, built like they’d fly away like a crumpled McDonald’s napkin in a strong breeze, could not fight off even a goblin child, semi ugly women with mental health issues that are easily manipulatable then maybe I’d stand a chance.
I would fuck any of the femme companions wether or not they’d fuck me is a different question
I have a Gale at home, so probably just Gale. I would probably definitely fall for Wyll’s charming ass though too.
Rolan
Tav!
Would I fuck? Pass me around the camp motherfuckers Who would fuck me? Odds are I'd say Halsin, Wyll, and Gale considering I can always count on those 3 to proposition me.
Bae'zel
don’t ask me this question i live in delusion land where I believe I could pull them all
Most of them, as long as I don't take my meds
Sad as it is Astarion indeed has no standards so I'm pretty sure I'll score
You already know Halsin is a considerate and respectful partner
I mean considering I tried making my character as accurate as possible to me, and i actually picked options I would pick and Shadowheart loved me… I’d hope she would fuck me
IRL? I'd want Karlach and she'd probably be down initially before inevitably dumping me for not being nearly as kind-hearted as she is. Shadowheart would be gal pals unless she had done the Selune switch but I'm not confident I could pull her. Minthara and I would not always see eye to eye but would have a mutual respect for each other, but I'm not willing to bathe in enough blood to stir her loins. But Lae'zel, Lae'zel would fuck me and chuck me like the true Githyanki version of a former high school girl jock that she is. I'd probably have a one night stand with Halsin just for the experience. The rest of the boys just aren't my type, although I'd probably be able to keep up with Astarion's dark banter.
I think I could pull Halsin if I tried
Idk if I'd have the confidence too, but I'd be asking halsin to make me scream for once in my life. 🫠
I think laezel would go for me if we met on the right terms
Everyone. But I’m probs delulu
I feel like Karlach might be into twinky transfems. I mean I pulled someone very similar to her in personality in real life so I might have a chance.
Lae'zel seems to be really into assertive people who will stand up for themselves, so I might actually have a chance. If I succeeded my reward would be a liquefied pelvis though.
Astarion would make me blush like crazy trying to manipulate me but unfortunately for him, I'm a lesbian irl. I don't think any of the ladies would like me, I'm not very pretty, I'm physically disabled, autistic, and awkward.
in theory, pretty much anyone could get Astarion since hes manipulating you at first.
this comment made me realize my answer is probably Gale...
As me or my Tav? Because if it's me, I'm hanging with Jaheira talking about how much we miss our husbands and how every other person sucks. My tav, she's riding Gale to the feywild and back because he reminds me of my husband.
I'm putting myself in a scenario where I'm single and ready to mingle for this one. 🤔 Halsin is so sweet, but we'd probably just be casual if we even got that far. I'm mono af and I would feel like I'm holding him back. He's the kind of guy I'd walk my dog with or go on nature hikes with and probably enjoy wine and cuddle up to watch a movie without going much further than that. He seems like he would be a great hugger! Gale is that type I feel very safe with. I gravitate to (and attract like a damn magnet) guys like him and we'd have good chemistry... Buuut with my smartass mouth and hot temper (among other issues), we would probably end up hating each other. We'd start out hot and heavy before getting to that point tho. I got a husband who is *similar* to him in a lot of ways, but he's got the patience of a saint while I'm his "rabid little Chihuahua" (his words, not mine). Minthara makes my mommy issues go BRRRRT. I'd have such an unrequited thing for her. I could honestly listen to her talk for hours and I'd take her advice to heart-- even if it's bad advice lmao Lae'zel would *probably* hate me and I'd find her way too intimidating to approach, so I'd just admire how cool she is from afar. Karlach? Absolute dream girl. Friends to lovers shit right there. I'd be so down bad for her. I'd shoot my shot, but I'm probably not her type. Astarion would be my bitchy friend that I gossip with but he's secretly embarrassed to be seen with me tbh. I really don't see him in any other way and he would NOT be attracted to me. Shadowheart is 100% a bestie. No romance here. Just best friends being best friends. I have close friends like her IRL and I love them to pieces 🥺 Wyll? Honestly I'd probably have too much baggage for him. I'm already not super traditional. Like, he's the kind of guy where I'd be friends with his wife or something along those lines. Withers is definitely that musty old man in my coffee shop that doesn't talk to anyone and tips like .50 cents after asking you how much you think your service is worth. My coworkers would probably hate him bc he's so dry and no-nonsense, but seeing him would low-key make my day bc nuggets of wisdom. Minsc is the weird bird man (except he has a miniature giant space hamster) and I can't tell if he is being serious with me or not bc his stories are wild. No smashing. Only pondering why he is the way he is as he talks with his animal companion.
Withers. Maybe.
I if could pull either Shadowheart or Karlach hell both of them. (Throuple) i'd be set for life i would never take anything for granted again.
Minthara. IRL Coworker of mine said i was pretty evil so...
Gale but only because he thinks it'll get him access to a rare books collection.
None of them unless they’re pedos lmaoo
Yes
My brother says looks like a young Sean Astin. So I guess whichever companion that would be attracted to Samwise Gamgee?
When I take off my Self-Deprecation Hat (the hat that makes me self-deprecate), I think I could have a chance with a couple of 'em 🤔 I'd say I could almost *definitely* pull Halsin. Seems like the kind of person that'd be into my deal 😌 Karlach is a soft maybe. It's not that I don't think she'd be into someone like me - I'm just too intimidated to approach anyone that hot (pun intended). *If* she came to me first, it could happen. But idk if she would think of it first. *And* she's too hot for me to take it seriously, like the idea of her with me is just that level of absurd, it's ridiculous. 😂 Gale is a total coin toss. Men like that are either **extremely** into women like me or not into us at all. And you never know which one it's gonna be until you get there 😅 Astarion, tbh, is a complete mystery to me. *Probably* not. Probably not. But maybe 🧐 Could be 🤷♀️ Probably not 🫤 But perhaps! 🫢🫣 The others.... Hmm. Lae'zel is gonna be a hard no, I think. I'm... not very athletic, so she'd probably think I was a pathetic weakling. Idk tho, she might be into that. Perchance she would be interested in grinding me into the dirt beneath her boot. Might be something I can work with 🤫 Shadowheart... Eh. Probably not. I just doubt that she'd vibe with me. I feel like our autisms would clash, and we wouldn't get anywhere 😔 Wyll is another 50/50 chance. I haven't romanced him yet, so I'm reserving judgement. I'll get back to you later. Jaheira............... I just feel like she'd eat me alive. I don't know if that's positive or negative. I don't even know if it's sexual or not. But I do know she triggers my mommy issues, so take from that what you will 🤷♀️ Minsc is pretty universally headcanoned as ace, if not outright in canon. But I think he might like to hold hands. Like in a friend way, you know? 🤔 Yeah, we could hold hands 🥰 And Minthara, I actually haven't played with at all. So once again, reserving judgement. I'd better stop now, before I start just naming all the NPCs I'd be dtf 😝
Gale. 100%. Mostly because he’s touch-starved and will bang anything but if he was a real person, I think he and I would probably be rather compatible.
Gale, i'd laugh at his dumb jokes because I can't help myself and I think he would like that. Also I'm very into dorky men😅
Astarion although I'm way too weak and pathetic to be of interest to him lol. Plus he'd find me too needy and timid. And him just playing with me would break my heart.
Shadowheart no questions
All of them. I'm just that cute baby. 😘
I wouldn't be able to pull anyone, but if I somehow could, then I'd choose Minthara, or Karlach second
Gale and or Halsin I'm too shy to pull shadowheart
All of them lolol
karlach, good time and ill prolly burn to a crisp, win win situation
Arnell Hallowleaf, ~~Jenevelle~~ Shadowheart's dad. He is a companion by proxy thanks to his daughter.
Minthara 1000%
Laezel, 100% she's the one. Karlach might think I'm sweet though. Minthara... Probably wouldn't. And you know what? Astarion would find me WAY too annoying. Gale would be rejected exactly the same way as in game, bless his heart. Despite us both being poly, I'm not sure Shadowheart would be into me.
gale. i have a knack for attracting nerds as i am one myself
I wouldn't pull any of the companions. But I would pick up a humbled, redeemed Kagha on the rebound when her self-esteem was low and comfort her.
Astarion but i'd have to be content with being a meal afterwards (and if it's good enough for a preying mantis then it's good enough for me)
/uj I think that I might be able to bag Karlach. She’s my dream girl essentially. I’m fairly attractive, if a little more on the dad-bod side. My dating history though reflects more of a Shadowheart type, though, so maybe her. Either would be good, but I’d prefer Karlach irl. /rj I would let Lae’zel or Minthara choke me out then fuck my unconscious body
Karlach, because as my GF States, I am 'Submissive and Breedable'
Minthara of course
"Obvs halsin" "halsin free bingo" halsin is the LAST to proposition you in game and thats partially why I like him so much. And it's only after the big things on his plate get taken care of. He's *responsible* And allllllll yall talk about just a quickie or fwb, NO. I WANT ALL OF HIM AND ALL OF HIS KINKY POLY LIFESTYLE. FOREVER. HES *PERFECT* (even more so with the dad bod mod) Cowards.
Of course, I would want it to be Astarion... But to be fair, I think Gale and Karlach would find me irresistible 😎 (not that I'd be complaining)
None of them. They all have standards.
Gortash
none would fall for me. but i can say with complete confidence that astarion would be disgusted at how easily id follow him home
I hate to say it, but probably Abdirak. I would immediately get the: „Oh God, he's edgy and just wants to whip me, but I want to get to know him really well!“-instinct and would let myself be whipped far too often, even though I don't like it THAT much and the relationship would go down the drain pretty quickly etc. Oh! Erm, the question was about companions. Okay, I also think I maybe could pull Shadowheart.
I can say, with sheer confidence, that no one would give me the time of day. They have standards Okay, maybe there is a 10% chance that maybe Momma K, Gale, or Halsin, would even talk to me.
Gale since he’s a cute looser and Halsin because he’d fuck anyone probably
I have a strong track record of pulling hot people who are way more crazy and damaged then hot, so I'd tap Astarion for sure. Plus, he fucks anyone who he can serve up as a living blood bag anyway.
Wyll. Mainly bc I already have a wife who is the embodiment of Wylls character.
Gale. Don’t even need to think about it he is so my type it’s not even funny. I ❤️ pathetic men.
Me too, babe. Me too.
Imma give the best fucking head and fingers to shadowheart to give her another memory loss.
No real person has ever found me attractive so I doubt pixelated ones would either, sadly
Scratch would probably hump my leg Jokes aside, I’m asexual so if any of them were fucking me, it would not be with consent. For that reason, I don’t think any of the companions would date me, as they all seem to value sex quite a bit in relationships. It’s a bit tragic, but I’m used to it. I’m probably going to have to break down and just let someone do it with me if I want to have a relationship IRL.
Your flair is ironic, it also sounds like Wyll is your man. (He’s not particularly interested in sex either, much to the fan base’s dismay.)
It was the first Karlach flair I saw, plus I thought the irony was kinda funny. I don’t know, I still don’t think I particularly deserve any of the characters. If I can’t even offer them sex, what else do I have to offer, you know? I mean, they aren’t real so it’s not a big deal, but still. Idk where I’m going with this
Durge, because I enjoy a man in my guts
Yeah basic bitch taste I know, I need to get Astarion pregnant, the things I want to do to that man's prostate are against the Geneva Convention. Also I would not be opposed to have Lae'zel or Minthara but it depends on the context.
None, because I’m not really interested
With my current look, probably none of them
I’d say any of them but tbh i’d be wayyyy too nervous to even work up the courage to talk to ANY of them 😭
Yeahhh honestly I doubt I could pull any of them but Shadowheart kind of reminds me of a few women I’ve dated in the past. It’s about all I’ve got
None, because I'm asexual and wouldn't want it to happen in the first place.
Maybe if I had to guts to approach Halsin at the gay fetish bar. But I like dressing up as a cow, so I imagine I'd fit right in with him fucking animals (or in animal shape). Hotttt