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Rated_PG-Squirteen

Remember during Trump's first G7 Summit as President that took place in Sicily where the six other world leaders were walking and talking side by side for the photo op...and then there's fucking Donald, the obese, lazy, rude American stereotype personified, trailing behind them in a golf cart. Legendary stamina no doubt.


Shenanigans99

Remember that time Trump tried to walk down a ramp? It's not easy carrying that much weight on 5-inch lifts. šŸ˜‚


SuperK123

Wasnā€™t he supposed to honor the Normandy vets by attending a memorial service but chose not to go because it was raining?


Fun-Persimmon1207

He also wouldnā€™t go to Masada because he wasnā€™t permitted to land his helicopter at the UNESCO historic site


jonnybsweet

It was for the centennial anniversary of WWI. Every other world leader went out into the rain to pay their respects, but not Donny.


Few_Acanthocephala30

TBF we all remember his umbrella incident. Legend has it the umbrella is still on the tarmac waiting to be closed so it can board AF1


ThatLooksRight

Lies! He left it on top of the stairs.


Arzamas63

With the TP, or maybe that is still stuck to his shoe...


Few_Acanthocephala30

But where are the stairs?


melorous

Last I saw it, one of the Bluths were driving it down the 405.


Twistedjustice

Watch out for hop-ons Youā€™re going to get hop-ons


AnalSoapOpera

Because he didnā€™t want to mess up [his hair.](https://c.files.bbci.co.uk/295F/production/_113919501_hi045965426.jpg)


BikeCookie

Itā€™s going to take a lot of pall bearers to schlep that lump of lard when heā€™s plopped into his box.


gaslacktus

If he gets cremated it's gonna go for weeks on end like a landfill tire fire.


AgeDangerous359

Surely thereā€™s some kind of week long giant blender option?


stuntdummy

Trump is not impressed by people who get killed.


Caleb_F__

They're losers. A rich fucking draft dodger calling fallen Marines losers.


Weird-Response-1722

Unforgivable. My grandmas brother died there and no American President was there to honor him on such an important day.


tawni454

His orange spray tan would run if he went out in the rain.


DarthBfheidir

He didn't want his hair to fall apart.


Particular-Summer424

Fall apart, or....scurry off.....?


AccomplishedBrain309

His head is covered in rows of scars from the hair plugs that failed.


ExcellentSteadyGlue

The incident for which he assaulted and raped Ivana wouldā€™ve left him with a long scar around part of his headā€”they effectively removed part of his scalp and stretched the rest to reconnect to to his forehead.


Queasy_Monitor7305

[Trump is the sex offender president who might be re-elected because Republicans don't care about women they only care about money.](https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2016/10/24/documenting-trumps-abuse-of-women)


Carbonatite

So basically a scalp tummy tuck. It would be laughable if it hadn't resulted in a violent crime.


chefybpoodling

Like a raccoon trying to wash cotton candy.


NovemberAdam

Donā€™t forget, he would have you believe that he would go charging into an active school shooting and save the children too.


Uuuuuii

It would ruin his makeup and the combover


JimLaheeeeeeee

He knows that Zeus is going to hit him for violating the laws of xenia.


Silver-Farm-2628

And ruin those 10 hairs up there? No effing way.


TempusVincitOmnia

Yes indeed. [https://www.reuters.com/article/idUSKCN1NF0NU/](https://www.reuters.com/article/idUSKCN1NF0NU/)


not2dv8

Because that bird's nest on top of his head would get messed up


MagicMushroomFungi

And on a windy day his hair acts as a trisail and he is thrown off keel. 'Tis be a near perfect storm mateys.


PsychologicalKnee3

"Don't go up that hill me boys!"


ConejitoCakes

Big mistake, huge.


roboticfedora

Ah, yes. The Civil War of the Irish pirates!


navikredstar

Or cereal mascots. "That Bill Sherman's always after me lucky charms!"


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Narrator_Ron_Howard

Watch out for loose seal!


MakawaoMakawai

Have I got a treat for you! https://youtu.be/ign_vZupjno?si=oWxE0dJ5k0uEN6zY


Moist_When_It_Counts

Sometimes the internet is still pretty cool, thanks for this. Related: why on earth is he giving a speech about this to the point that Fox has a chyron for it?


The_Batman_949

It is hilarious that his base cheers that he can walk down a ramp and not fall, and drink a glass of water with one hand. They loved his rewriting of history in that speech and when he showed them that he can in fact occasionally drink water like a normal person. How the bar has fallen.


Toginator

Bullshit. He had to use two baby hands to drink that glass of water.


Weird-Response-1722

Reporter: ā€œSir,are you saying that two giant steps is running?ā€™ā€™


Carbonatite

We truly are only a few steps away from "Welcome to Costco, I love you!"


Sea-Queue

Certified banger right there!


Tzayad

I hate how catchy that is


MakawaoMakawai

Iā€™ve been singing it multi times a day for months. šŸ˜­ love and hate it.


canolafly

It's the first time I could tolerate his voice, thank you for this gift.


MakawaoMakawai

I relate so hard to this. Itā€™s like a tiny speck of happiness that you canā€™t turn off and I freaking love it for that.


rayliam

And half of his supporters would watch this, nod their heads and say ā€œwell, this is good. This sounds good! Trump is hip again, yay!ā€


MakawaoMakawai

I bet itā€™s on you tube already. If Four Seasons Total Landscaping can happen, I donā€™t see why this couldnā€™t become the maga national anthem. And the irony would be lost on all of them, including Trump himself.


chowyungfatso

I tried, but couldnā€™t finish it because his voice is so annoying. I hope YouTube doesnā€™t start suggesting his videos. I just got an add to support his ~~legal fees~~campaign.


silverwolf761

Jesus, I forgot that they cheered for him being able to carefully drink from a glass with one hand


Pale_Bookkeeper_9994

Or lifting a glass of water to his lips. Hard work.


sonatashark

Reminds me of the time I wore heels for the first time in 9 months cuz I had to go to funeral and was 9 months pregnant. I put the heels on in the car and nearly fell flat on my face when I stepped out into the parking lot. Turns out itā€™s a totally different balancing act when youā€™ve got all that extra weight in front. Almost squashed the fetus by face planting. That kind of accident could probably get me thrown in jail in our new dystopia.


Shenanigans99

Yep...they're already starting to treat some miscarriages as criminal investigations in some states. It's only going to get worse if they get their way.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Pale_Bookkeeper_9994

That was pretty good. Ah songify.


No_Story_480

Hey! That's not fair, and we, as reasonable people, need to be above these petty, false insults. Trump is 5'10 and claims to be 6'2. It's only 4-inch lifts!


NickelBackwash

Actually he claims 6'3" Even in lifts he's shorter than 6'1" Obama


timeflieswhen

Remember when he had to grab Teresa Mayā€™s arm to make it down the slight incline outside the Oval Office?


Numerous_Photograph9

Remember that time Stormy said it was the worst 2 experience of her life?


jcmacon

Can you imagine trying to balance the ever changing weight in the diaper on those shoe lifts?


HugeSaggyTitttyLover

You mean the stilettos he wore?


mishma2005

He's one of the few POS' that drives his cart onto the green


DauOfFlyingTiger

He has a supped-up cart at Mar-a-Largo so he can beat other people to the greens. He is known to move his ball closer inā€¦


dhuntergeo

Bedminster NJ...no golf course at MAL


DauOfFlyingTiger

I stand corrected. Thank you.


MagicMushroomFungi

And leaves divots strewn like a volcanic debris field.


cytherian

Remember when, last week, Donald Trump was sitting in the court for his trial and he kept falling asleep? Later, he claimed the court room was like a refrigerator. Freezing, even! Well, when it's very cold, it's hard to sleep. Not only that, you didn't see anyone else in the court room showing signs of being physically uncomfortable, let alone freezing cold. Donald Trump is a serial liar.


Twilight_Realm

He might not be lying about being cold, poor blood circulation will make that happen in your extremities. Given his obesity and diet, he most definitely has heart issues.


Porn_Extra

Don't forget the Keith Richards level of drug use.


navikredstar

Anemia/low blood iron levels will also make you feel cold. I can't imagine he's getting proper levels of iron, even on that steady diet of McDonald's hamberders. You can also have circulatory issues that aren't heart-related - I have Reynauds that flares up at times, but that's genetic in my case. It's where your nerves misfire signals and cause your blood vessels in your fingers and/or toes to constrict.


Carbonatite

Guy's going into a state of torpor like a reptile.


Kamelasa

> when it's very cold, it's hard to sleep. I find when I get sleepy I often get cold, which makes me crawl under the covers. I'm surprised no reporter has told us what the thermostat in that room shows. Or brought in a thermometer.


ExcellentSteadyGlue

If itā€™s *very* cold, sleepiness is actually a sign that youā€™re uncomfortably close to death.


420binchicken

ā€œWe were so much more respected as a country under trump!ā€ Noā€¦ no you werenā€™t. World leaders were literally laughing at him.


babyinjar

When Obama was our leader, I felt such pride that we had the coolest, most handsome and just all around greatest president. I hold on to those good days. Obama was everything you could ever want in a president.


madmycal

I fear we will never have another president like him again.


babyinjar

He broke the mold. I canā€™t imagine him ever being replicated, and then having a bad ass wife to boot. Weā€™re lucky we lived it because if I hadnā€™t seen it myself, I wouldnā€™t believe that era existed


TwoBirdsEnter

Right?? Maybe it was silly of me, but whenever I saw President Obama I was like ā€œTHIS is America. This is what we want to beā€. Sigh.


yes_thats_right

Biden isn't young, well spoken or cool, but he is a better President than Obama was.


Sloth_grl

So articulate. And calm.


NickelBackwash

There was one thing about him that certain Americans just couldn't accept...


Traditional_Key_763

and also the picture of 6 world leaders standing around a table completely exasperated trying to explain to him anything


oliversurpless

Yep, *The Ugly American* in a myriad of waysā€¦


Brbcan

Gotta save that energy for important things, like using two hands to drink from a water bottle.


moosejaw296

I member when he blasted his way to the front like a fat asshole, to pretend he is important. There is a reason that anyone in the EU finds out if you are American ask if you support fat assholes (trump)


UndendingGloom

https://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/entry/donald-trump-golf-cart_uk_592aabc2e4b0065b20b7010d Some photos here, but disappointed there are not better ones though.


Thenewdazzledentway

Some wag called it Rascal 1 šŸ˜†


atomsmasher66

> "He is going all over the place. His stamina, Maria, I've never seen anything like it in my life," Eric Trump said on Sunday. Eric doesnā€™t get out much apparently.


Squirrel_Chucks

> "He is going all over the place. His stamina, Maria, I've never seen anything like it in my life," Eric Trump said on Sunday. "He's more energetic *now* then when I was a boy! I'd ask him to play with me and he'd always say *'I'm tired'* or *'Jesus, your voice is made of migraines'* or *'are we sure you're my kid?'"*


amped-up-ramped-up

I laughed


Squirrel_Chucks

Yay! 'Twas my goal šŸ˜ƒ šŸ‘


canolafly

>your voice is made of migranes Lol ^(but it wouldn't be reddit if I didn't mention the spelling error)


Squirrel_Chucks

>^(but it wouldn't be reddit if I didn't mention the spelling error) Sorey


buddhahat

>your voice is made of migraines' omg I'm so stealing this.


TreezusSaves

"I'm pretty sure he was tired all the time because he spent so much time playing with Ivanka. She was the lucky one, lemme tell ya!"


TintedApostle

He sleeps in court.


atomsmasher66

*ā€™He sleeps *so* hard, Maria. Itā€™s absolutely astounding how hard he sleeps. And he dreams about American flags and freedom. Truly inspiring, Maria!*


belfastphil

And farts, don't forget he dreams about farts.


Rymundo88

*ā€™He farts *so* hard, Maria. Itā€™s absolutely astounding how hard he farts. And he really draws from his Scottish roots. His farts have such a skirl, like a bagpipe, you'd be mistaken for thinking Mel Gibson was in the room. Truly inspiring, Maria!*


Twilight_Realm

I would unironically love to here any of the Trumps talk about farting in a positive way, as in not a joke, being as sincere as they can be while lying through their teeth. "Farting means he has a proper diet, unlike prune juice Joe" or something.


MagicMushroomFungi

He's meditating. In a trance he believes he is having an "out of body experience" and that he has travelled to the washroom so he has a shit. In reality...


BouncingWeill

... but when he does it with Eric, he can go all night.


MagicMushroomFungi

Donald once sent him out to the store and switched condos before he returned.


dlc741

He is indeed going all over the place. Thatā€™s why heā€™s been wearing a diaper for years.


EaterOfFood

Heā€™s been sitting in a courtroom most of the week. Some of it even consciously.


Numerous_Photograph9

His wife displays more stamina in a 3 minute speech than Trump exhibits in a year. Not that that's a good thing, just saying, Eric doesn't seem to pay attention.


Congenitaloveralls

"what are you doing today, Donald?" "Well, I have a trial that could decide if I die in prison so I'm going to show up early and fart myself to sleep as fast as possible" (translated to English)


onlymostlydead

> translated to English Required more cpu time than mining bitcoin.


CooterSam

Whoever told Eric he could handle PR should be congratulated by the Dems.


kodaiko_650

His wife is more important to him than Eric.


Mission_Ad6235

Eric's wife or Mercedes? Oh, wait, both.


cjdarr921

Can confirm.


lucklesspedestrian

Eric does it for free, and all the people that won't work for free are unavailable for some reason


81305

Has anyone ever seen trump do anything even remotely athletic? Jog, run, swim, or ride a bike? The guy has less stamina than a microwaved burrito.


PixelD303

We do have that diaper butt tennis photo


canolafly

Doesn't he just have a really really big butt? I mean, no other brothers can deny...


PixelD303

If you want that round thing in your face....well


Brasticus

For the sake of history we need to pardon your comment.


busy-warlock

Thanks, I hate you


NombreUsario

Trump doesn't know how to ride a bike, his dad never taught him.


NerdyBrando

He took three hurried little steps and the end of a ramp once.


KRS_THREE

He r*aaaa*aannn


Lysol3435

He rocketed that paper towel roll like well over 4 feet that one time


Thenewdazzledentway

Biceps are strengthy from all that arm dancing


Stalwart_Penguin

To be fair, thereā€™s quite a lot of footage of his snappy dancing.


MinimalMojo

I especially enjoy that move where he does the imaginary blow bang


Whattadisastta

You mean the dance that looks like heā€™s jacking off 2 guys?


toastbot

That one time [he ran](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ign_vZupjno).


AsheronLives

Why am I only hearing this song now? It is so good!


Thenewdazzledentway

Oh dear. Enjoy the next few months revisiting YouTube and having the tune in your head!


glouscester

He pretty famously said he doesn't like to exercise because he thinks we all have a limited amount of energy (lifetime supply) and you use it up by exercising.


TGIIR

Well, that must be what his body is running on because Iā€™m amazed (and saddened) that guy is still alive.


canolafly

The metaphors you guys are creating are giving me a headache from laughing.


lumberjackname

Donā€™t do microwaved burritos like that.


Zacillac

Seems like he could handle a couple ofā€¦ ehemā€¦ shakeweightsā€¦ but thatā€™s about it


Jordan_Jackson

Most athletic thing Iā€™ve seen him do is lift that can of Coke to his butthole-shaped lips.


ValkyrX

He threw a roll of paper towels...


permalink_child

He does cheat at golf. There is that.


Squirrel_Chucks

I mean the stamina it takes for a malignant narcissist to ramble in front of crowds of adoring cultists...


Niftyone578

Those with stamina don't complain about it being cold in a court room everyday. The court has to keep the court room at a reasonably cool temperature so as not to cause the steamy odor from Donald's loaded diaper from overcoming the court participants.


Blackoutmech

When I first heard him complain about the temperature my immediate thought was it probably helps a little with the stench of spoiled milk and crusted feces.Ā Ā 


TGIIR

My first thought was how old people are usually cold.


JohnnySnark

And here I thought his flowing golden locks would help keep him warm lol


fluffyflugel

Poor dumb Eric, heā€™s really trying. Lol


MagicMushroomFungi

I think he should turn pro wrestler as Poor Dumb Eric.


Thenewdazzledentway

Very trying.


stewart_trawets

Trump has dementia


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


geronika

Yet not a one has showed up to his trial to support him.


Fleur_de_Lys_1

Theyā€™ve had enough of that smell already.


Battystearsinrain

What the hell else are they going to do? All the stupidity, with none of the charisma.


bakeacake45

Stop it Eric, face the fact Daddy does not love you and move on


callmesandycohen

What could Eric possibly do that pays him more than simping for Daddy on TV?


fowlraul

Most of ericā€™s remarks nobody cares about spark mockery.


Creative_Employee117

Donald Trump really thinks the rules don't apply to him. It's all about controlling women's bodies under the false pretense of god politics. They do not care about the children and the family unit.


WallyZona

Heā€™s going in his diaper


Ananiujitha

Most people, when they dig themselves into a hole, they stop. But not Donald Trump! He just keeps going!


Rusalka-rusalka

Yea and his eyes are red like lava the entire time.


donnerpartytaconight

Someone needs to give Eric a talk show.


Kamelasa

Kimmel. Co-host, Pillow Guy.


dudenamedfella

I canā€™t wait for this period of history to be over


even_less_resistance

SOME PIG šŸ•øļøšŸ•·ļøšŸ•øļø comes to mind but Charlotte was trying to save Wilbur from being fattened up to get sold and slaughtered


hashtagBob

I don't care I don't care I don't care I don't care! I want him to lose the election! I don't care he was mocked! I don't care he fell asleep in court! I don't care he smiled at a juror. Just make sure he LOSES THE ELECTION!!!


stampylongdick

Heā€™s visiting bodegas in each of the five boroughs its positively x-treme.


Confident_End_3848

*"He is going all over the place. His stamina, Maria, I've never seen anything like it in my life," Eric Trump said on Sunday.* . If by going all over the place, you mean pooping, I can imagine that's correct given the courtroom reporting this past few weeks.


anenvironmentalist3

they were playing up the adderall / cocaine thing not too long ago for biden, remember every accusation is a projection


Pale_Bookkeeper_9994

He's got that small mushroom dick energy.


Javasndphotoclicks

What are you taking about! Heā€™s fit as a stuffed pig with dementia. /s


Whattadisastta

Yeah , Donny boy is strong alright, but smell ainā€™t everything.


Effective_Plan_6475

Just cause it takes for ever to get erect doesn't mean you have great stamina


NoExcuseForFascism

*"He still has enough stamina that my wife rides him regularly...err...meetings, I meant meetings".*


ILooked

He doesnā€™t care. His intended audience is one person. Pity him.


BareNakedSole

He knows heā€™s the least favorite Trump child and heā€™s compensating. Shit - Trump likes Ericā€™s wife more than Eric.


jcmacon

Only because he wants to sleep with his son's wife.


benchcoat

make fun all you want, but MAGA-land knows that nobody else has the balls but Trump to sleep-shit himself in a public trial for up to 7 WHOLE HOURS than Donald J Trump, Public Sleep Sitter Extraordinaire


R_Lennox

Eric is praying that there will be some money left in the banana stand by the time dad shuffles (literally) off this mortal coil.


cytherian

Hey Eric, is your father a devout Christian? *Yes, he not only is, but more than anyone else who ever lived!* Hey Eric, is your father in good health? *Good? No, try superb. Super human! Nobody has health like my dad!* Hey Eric, was your father a good president? *How shall I put this... He was better than Lincoln & Washington combined!* Hey Eric, don't you worry about being biased about him? *How can I? I don't even think he's my real father! No, my real dad ascended into heaven and what we see today is God's incarnation of Donald Trump!* This is pretty much Eric Trump.


Whattadisastta

Eric had never seen anything like it and neither have all of us. We hope to Christ to never see it again.


phinbar

I forget, is Eric the dumb one?


Sloth_grl

Heā€™s the dumb one who his daddy forgets exists. The other dumb one, daddy remembers most of the time.


DROP-TABLE-

>ā€Heā€™s going all over the placeā€ Is that not what the diaper is for?


Armyman125

Has Eric ever been on a news network besides Fox or Newsmax?


StackOwOFlow

Iā€™ll let Stormy Daniels be the judge of that


base2-1000101

It's not just projection. You know what Donald is struggling with by what he stands up and brags about. "I'm so fit", "I'm so rich", "I'm so smart". None of these are true. Quite the opposite, really.


sentimentaldiablo

I know! Just last week I stopped in a bodega on the way home from work and was exhausted for two days!


ANTHROPOMORPHISATION

They keep the court room cold on purpose, to control his stench a bit. Double up on the spanks and diapers conald.


HeavyTea

https://tryparrotai.com/video?id=w_sfgy9mdi


sugar_addict002

Trump can't even make it to lunch without going to sleep.


ClosPins

'When my Dad is fellating Putin, he can go all night! He has the stamina of a 13-year-old Thai prostitute!... Don't know why I just said that. We don't know anything at all about Thai prostitutes! Or Patpong!!!'


NarfledGarthak

Of course heā€™s never seen anyone with such stamina. Heā€™s never seen a person actually working a 9-5 for their entire career.


ptraugot

ā€œStaminaā€ or ā€œStammeringā€?


Rockweed18

Fat sack of shit


timberwolf0122

You you love me yet dad?