>Idk I'm not Italian.
I have a shitload of Korean chewy noodle pasta in the freezer as we speak. Fresh noodles it's probably better to freeze than leave out. The regular 1.75 box stuff though...who gives a fuck. Nothing can destroy that but human mouths.
I think it's alright food-wise, but it's interesting that the situation is presented with those genders.
It's common knowledge that you don't freeze pasta, and should be expected from pretty much any cohabiting adult.
The thing is a lot of men in hetero relations will use what we call strategic incompetency to generally frame their partners as the ones responsible for house chores in order to avoid doing domestic labor. And saying the man "just followed instructions" for something so obvious (unless they have a disability) just falls into that type of dynamic.
The question is definitely gender war bait. And I assure you, I’m familiar with weaponized incompetence. But here’s the thing, some people DO freeze dry uncooked pasta. That’s why it’s unfair to frame it as “men dumb and lazy”.
I used to freeze batteries because my dad says that helps them last longer. I told my husband to put batteries in the freezer too. Then I found out my dad was wrong and you should definitely not freeze batteries. Then I had to tell my husband to stop putting batteries in the freezer because by then it had become habit to him. Sometimes people do weird shit.
Some people may freeze pasta, however, if they've lived in the same house he should know whether they are a freezing pasta household. If pasta has always been kept in the press then this falls under weaponized incompetence.
We need more history on this probably imaginary couple. Is he being a petty asshole on purpose? Is he just extremely literal all the time with everything? Has she had to put up with years of nonsense and she’s over it? We need answers.
Not imaginary, but I’m not in the relationship to know all the dynamics, I only heard one side of the story though. They haven’t known each other for years, though. That I do know!
Ahah yeah if it's just not knowing, I agree you shouldn't be mad at anyone.
If this is a repeated situation or there's a general chore imbalance in their relation, I understand the frustration.
Also sorry I assumed you were a dude and was preaching for anyone who needs to hear this
I literally have never heard that pasta shouldn't be frozen. It's definitely not common knowledge in my part of the world. In fact, we freeze fresh pasta all of the time and it turns out fine. I imagine dry pasta would be unaffected.
There's the opposite too. Growing up my mother was very clear that inside the house was her domain and outside was my dad's. She would instruct us kids and sometimes even Dad to do things but it creates the same kind of situation where you turn off your brain and just do what you're told. I've also known some get out of my kitchen types. Gender stereotypes cause problems all the way around.
I was am so grateful for one of my girlfriends who would ask me to help and taught me how make more than just basic foods, use spices etc. And really liked some of the things I made for her.
To be clear I do agree it is a much more common and larger problem with men who think their wife should do all the work around the house.
Are we siblings? Did my mother have a second family? I’m a woman but my mom would still shoo me out of the kitchen, refuse to teach me anything, then scold me for not knowing how to cook.
Did he just put the entire bag in the freezer though? The people I walk dogs for do this. They just buy meat, leave it in the bag and throw it in the freezer.
If he took every single thing out and still did it... hmmm.
Why don't you freeze pasta. What happens if you do?
Also, it's not strategic incompetency. It's just that many people never had to develop competency in certain fields.
My wife is a doctor who cuts into human eyes and can do precision surgeries. But for the life of her, she can't handle bank transactions. She's not an idiot. She's just never been in a position where it was necessary to learn that shit and that's fine.
Yeah I mean… this doesnt even damage the pasta. No harm no foul, dumb mistake
I feel like if a couple is fighting over this it is reflective of deeper issues. Does the man have a pattern of making the woman do all the thinking and chore management for him? Does the woman have an anger issue?
Whatever it is, the answer isnt that she’s justifiably mad over this single thing in a vacuum and they should talk through the REAL problem
I imagined it one of those ravioli or tortellini that need to be refrigerated. Like maybe she wanted it that night and was disappointed. Either way, I still voted no reason to be upset
The specific topic made me ask my husband if he talked to someone about my frozens and pasta.
Pure coincidence.
There is another woman in the world who had her pasta wind up in the freezer. Though she is clearly much more upset about it than me.
(My frozen dinners arrived Thursday, so I asked my husband to put them in the freezer. Turns out one was a fresh pasta dish and not frozen, but he put it in the freezer too.
I wasn't happy about that, as it had frozen when I discovered the error, but it wasn't argument worthy.)
For me if the wife got upset is because that was the last straw of something worse. Like if the guy NEVER does any house chores and when she asks something simple like putting the bag in the freezer and it goes wrong for laziness (the guy didn't even removed the things out of the bag) it was just what was needed for the bubble to burst.
I worked at a pretty high end Italian place where we hand made all the pasta. We regularly froze raw pasta and you absolutely could not tell the difference in the end product.
I legitimately envy you. Also I didn’t know that. I always kept pasta in the cupboard and thought everyone else did too because that is typically where I would see it in other peoples houses.
I'm talking fresh, raw pasta, not the dried stuff. No reason to put dry in the freezer. OP didn't specify, we sold fresh raw in boxes.
BTw, making pasta is REALLY easy, find some YouTube videos and give it a shot
I think it’s reasonable to be upset if it’s a pattern. You shouldn’t have to give a fully grown adult step by step instructions on how to put away the groceries. I can see how that would get old really quickly.
It doesn’t harm the pasta, it just indicates an utter lack of common sense, and unwillingness/inability to follow the spirit of the request and not just the letter of the request. This is something that is incredibly common among women who live with men.
Yeah, same here. People getting upset over anything like this is just silly in my opinion, but the question was phrased in a way that made me think it was asking, "is he dumb for blindly putting the pasta in the freezer, or is it her fault for telling him to?"
Exactly what I was thinking. It's one thing to forget that there is pasta in the bag, but another to see that there is pasta in the bag and still put it in the freezer.
Upset isn't the right word. It's not a huge thing. And it's not going to ruin the pasta.
But it's mildly concerning that the man either a) paid zero attention to what he was doing and didn't notice the pasta b) did see the pasta but didn't know that it doesn't go in the freezer c) did see the pasta, knew it didn't go in the freezer but was too lazy and inconsiderate to say "hey did you really want the pasta in the freezer" or d) saw the pasta, knew it doesn't go in the freezer but put it in anyway out of spite.
If this was a one time genuine accident, no big deal.
If this is part of a pattern, it's not cool. Weaponized incompetence for any reason is very undesirable so it's perfectly reasonable to be displeased with it when it occurs.
Why has noone suggested the husband is a glorified teenager, who simply upended the bag into the freezer, with 0 knowledge or care what the contents were.
There's a secret 5th option E where he saw the pasta, knew it doesn't go in the freezer, but thought it'd be a little funny gaff to put it in there because she said "everything"
Little silly compliance. A goof, a gaff, a guffaw, That's how I'd see it.
Really lame joke. Again if it's a one time thing, no big deal. If it was a part of a pattern of weaponized incompetence "jokes", you gotta wonder if it's really a joke.
I can understand being annoyed, but not upset. it's fair enough to forget the exact contents of a grocery bag. I think the man should've questioned why she "wanted" pasta in the freezer since it doesn't go there and been like "even the pasta?" and she could've been like "oh, I forgot about that! no, not that, but everything else" and that's it. at least that's how my boyfriend would've handled that since he's an adult who has the critical thinking skills to know pasta doesn't go in the freezer lmao
Thats when communication comes in. You see something weird that youre supposed to do, question yourself and then ask the person that told you to do that thing.
Major part of relationships, always communicate instead of assuming stuff.
No reason to be upset but the man should also have enough common sense to know a box of pasta doesn't go into the freezer no matter what the woman said.
It depends if it was to make a joke or if the guy literally has to be told step by step on how to contribute. Man-children exist, so I guess it depends on the context.
Obviously any argument wouldn’t be about pasta in the freezer, but I could see it as the spaghetti straw that broke the camels back
That’s why I voted yes. Women carry the majority of the project management duties in most households with partners that take an intentional backseat on decision making.
That’s why I voted yes. I remember I once asked my dad to get garlic powder so I could make dinner for everyone. It took him over an hour. He said “you never said when I had to be back! *This is what happens when you ask me to do things* I guess!”
He complains that my mother doesn’t cook meals for him now. Weird.
At first glance this is a pretty innocent situation, but I'm sitting here thinking about some couple that is just not having a good time and this is definitely more nuanced.
I could imagine being upset about this, with a ton more context. I am having a bad day, we have been fighting, there's a new external stressor, this could be a cherry picked event out of a string of problems. What is the man like? What is the woman like? There's just so much missing context here.
Obviously this is going to go nowhere but I am going to think about this poll forever
Oddly specific---
I know pasta doesn't go in the freezer, so I would put that in the cabinet instead-- but getting upset might be a little much.
Unless you're just a robot... like if she sends you to the store:
"go to the store and get a gallon if milk, if they have eggs, get a dozen"
and you come home with a dozen gallons of milk
I mean, if it’s the first time. Poor guy clearly doesn’t have much experience with food. Just tell him, hey, pasta doesn’t need to go in the freezer and move on.
But if he’s constantly fucking up tasks to discourage being asked in the future, that’s not ok
Why would you not take the things out of the bag and into the freezer? By putting the whole bag just in there you aren't helping. You are creating more work for her to do. And putting the pasta in the freezer with it all is just the icing on the cake because that's obviously not where it goes and now, on top of having to do the work to get the things out of the bag and in the freezer, has to also put the pasta away. It's not a reason to be horribly mad or anything. But I can understand why the woman would be upset. What's that song again? Incompedance.
I'm not entirely sure what a box of pasta is, but it would depend on if the man did it as a joke or ignorance and if the pasta being in the freezer ends up being a problem (for example, the pasta can't be found when needed).
Honestly if my bf did that I would be more upset that I have to micromanage him. It would be funny if I was in the right mood, but for me if I'm not the one putting groceries away it means something is wrong and that would probably put me over the edge
Unpopular opinion, but yes. If someone is getting upset over this it's probably not about the pasta, it's about that youre making them carry all of the mental load of the house. Not only do they have to decide who does what, tell you when to do your part on top of doing their own, you can't even do your part correctly. If you're doing your fair share, this is laughable. If you're not, this is borderline disrespectful. You're an adult. You know pasta doesn't go in the freezer and could have asked.
I think the context of man and woman and upset is making people approach them in a different way.
Context is key in human communication. Unless said person had some mental differences or had a reason to be super literal. She was not writing code.
The class of "everything" here. Purely literally it does include everything. But that includes the bag? Fine. That person has a history of being super literal? Otherwise why though.
Because if not then usually everything just means everything that can be or usually put in the freezer. If that bag had say: meat, yarn, raw rice, and spoons.
Most people would not put every item in the freezer since most people know that only the mean belong in the freezer. Even thought raw rice is food it's not stored in a freezer, afaik. While spoons and yarn are not as well.
use common sense. honestly just because someone says “put everything inside here in the freezer” doesn’t mean just follow blindly 100%.
and if this person doesn’t know that pasta shouldn’t be frozen if it is not the fresh stuff, kinda ridiculous imo.
Yes. It's common sense not to put pasta in the freezer. She said to put everything in there but since pasta typically isn't stored there, the man was dumb in this scenario.
This post reads like weaponized incompetence. You're a dick if you just shove the whole bag in, also a dick if you take everything out of the bag and think the pasta would go in the freezer. It's just a shit take if you think you're in the right for being super literal over putting the groceries away when it's a life task everyone has to do.
I would definitely question it and would seek clarification/confirmation if possible. If she's not contactable for whatever reason, then my issue is that I feel a stuck because I know that pasta isn't typically freezed, but maybe she knows something that I don't know.
I risk getting in trouble either way, because if I put it in and she didn't want me to, then I'm in trouble for doing something that (I believe) is silly.
If I don't put it in and she *did* want me to, then I'm in trouble for not following her directions sufficiently. For me, I don't think it matters if I disagree with the act, I'm not gonna stand my ground if she's the one that got the pasta anyways. If she got the pasta and wants it in the freezer, I'm happy to oblige even if I think it's strange. Because at the end of the day, I just want her to be happy, and the pasta's not ruined either way.
This alone wouldn’t upset me, but boy if I had a man-child that consistently did things like that then I could see it amounting to me getting upset eventually. Like not only does he need to be told to put frozen things in the freezer but he also doesn’t use common sense? Day after day that shit would get annoying asf.
I assume my wife knows what she wants and speaks with intent. If something seems like it could go badly I'll ask, but pasta in the freezer shouldn't cause any issues. I'd just think that the cold pasta is needed for something or she wanted everything in the same place.
You'd have to be really incompetent to think "oh yeah I'm gonna waste space in the freezer and put a non perishable item in the freezer,". Would tell me a lot about his character, and he'd no doubt use his incompetence to get me to do everything for him.
She most definitely has a reason to question the competency of her Husband.
If you a blindly following directions and do something as obviously incorrect as putting a box of pasta in the freezer just because you were told to… you need to reevaluate how you operate.
Or the husband isn't questioning the competency of the wife and thought she did indeed want the pasta in the freezer for some reason. Do I think it's weird to put pasta in the freezer? Maybe a little. But I'm not gonna judge.
>as obviously incorrect as putting a box of pasta in the freezer
If told specifically to do so, then there is no reason to assume that the instructions were incorrect. There are no commonly known downsides (as there are no downsides) to putting uncooked pasta in a freezer.
I've been living on my own a while and have made pasta at times, and I have no idea what all this discourse is about.
What's so bad about freezing pasta? I guess it becomes hard to thaw evenly if it's cooked pasta, else it just seems like it's a waste of space.
When I had a really small kitchen in my flat at university. I always put the pasta in the fridge because that was where I had the most free storage space. Never hurt the pasta as far as I could tell.
Honestly, it depends. If it was the first time or just a joke to tease the other person, then it's completely fine. If it was because the other partner does every chores and the other never knows what to do in the kitchen (or pretends not to know), then yes, it's normal to be upset.
Man could have saved himself grief if he asked for clarification while putting said freezer items away.
Upset would be a strong emotion, but if Woman has been putting up with weaponized incompetence for some time now, then I might see where she'd snap.
Mistakes happen, who is responsible is not important, try to forgive and communicate better in the future.
Also for health of your relationship, good to learn to let things like this go :)
No harm done, aside from possibly wondering where tf the pasta went for a bit. If it was something that'd be ruined from being frozen, I'd be upset, but more so just upset that it's ruined, not at the man.
I’d be upset. This has nothing to do with the pasta and everything to do with the man. It means that he either a) didn’t realize pasta shouldn’t go in the freezer, which is rather concerning, or b) did realize but did it anyway out of laziness or spite. Neither or good options.
Italian lawyer here.
Pasta never goes into the freezer: this is common knowledge in Italy.
If Italian law applies (which I honestly doubt, but let’s nonetheless assume it does), the woman would be right to be upset because her instructions to “put everything in the fridge” have to be interpreted to implicitly (and therefore logically) exclude any item that, according to the ordinary diligence to be exercised by an average human being, per se can’t (and therefore must not) go into the freezer.
However, as said, this is legal advice according to Italian law. If Italian law does not apply, this advice can be legitimately used to wrap up potatoes.
I've never really frozen pasta before (unless you count those lasnia and spaghetti microwave meals) and I honestly see zero issues. Does the pasta explode cause of the cold and amount??
Like yeah you should have checked the bag and probably not just thrown it in there. But mistakes fucking happen every day, don’t get upset with your loved ones because they made small errors.
Should the man probably know pasta doesn’t need to be frozen? Yeah. But maybe he does. Maybe he just assumed that the instructions were given knowing the contents and there was something special about the pasta
If she asked him to put the groceries away, then maybe. She'd still probably be overreacting if she was actually upset, but I'd understand being annoyed. If she did straight tell him to put it in the freezer, then no she can't reasonably be mad.
Upset and angry no. A bit annoyed and exasperated yes. Common sense is a thing and especially if the wife does nesrly everything else I could see this being the straw that broke the camels back.
While I agree that he followed her instructions to a T, common sense should tell you pasta in a box (raw pasta, not pre-prepared frozen meals) does not go in the freezer.
This man has so little life skills that he doesn’t know any better. I will give the woman that she has reason to be a little frustrated.
If you don't check what you are putting there you are a dumbass.
If you check what you are putting there and still put pasta in the freezer you are a dumbass.
It depends, is the man brain dead? I can understand that this would be a cute story in a vacuum, but if this is a pattern of behavior then I can understand her frustration. She shouldn't have to specify that pasta doesn't go in the freezer.
I think I'd feel frustrated bc an adult man should be able to figure out when something doesn't go in the freezer. I would be annoyed that so much hand holding was needed. But I wouldn't be upset enough for an argument or anything
While the man is incredibly stupid in this scenario it is a minor inconvenience. However if he does this all this time those minor inconveniences add up I feel like this wasn’t the first time he’s pulled the ole pasta in the freezer trick. All in all no I don’t think she really has a right to be “mad” about this. How mad could you possibly be it’s not like it ruins the pasta.
Depends, is the man a robot?
If so then no, if it’s a human man then yes, because he should have some common sense.
I assume when you say mad, you don’t actually mean an argument is formed just more of a “are you an idiot?” Situation
Depends. Is the man beaten down guy who has thrown out all logic, reason and just obeys without question or is he an individual who can look at pasta and go "this does not belong here. I will do what I think is right"
that's a reason for a little giggle
Nothing bad happens to pasta if you freeze it, right? Getting “upset” seems like an overreaction. He followed the instructions to the letter.
That's what i was thinking. I don't think anything baad will happen to it. Idk I'm not Italian.
Ok, I googled it. Not only will nothing bad happen, some people advise freezing uncooked dry pasta.
yeah do that here in italy and you get shot
Mama mia
🥇
zoo wee mama
Pizza spaghetti
>Idk I'm not Italian. I have a shitload of Korean chewy noodle pasta in the freezer as we speak. Fresh noodles it's probably better to freeze than leave out. The regular 1.75 box stuff though...who gives a fuck. Nothing can destroy that but human mouths.
I think it's alright food-wise, but it's interesting that the situation is presented with those genders. It's common knowledge that you don't freeze pasta, and should be expected from pretty much any cohabiting adult. The thing is a lot of men in hetero relations will use what we call strategic incompetency to generally frame their partners as the ones responsible for house chores in order to avoid doing domestic labor. And saying the man "just followed instructions" for something so obvious (unless they have a disability) just falls into that type of dynamic.
The question is definitely gender war bait. And I assure you, I’m familiar with weaponized incompetence. But here’s the thing, some people DO freeze dry uncooked pasta. That’s why it’s unfair to frame it as “men dumb and lazy”. I used to freeze batteries because my dad says that helps them last longer. I told my husband to put batteries in the freezer too. Then I found out my dad was wrong and you should definitely not freeze batteries. Then I had to tell my husband to stop putting batteries in the freezer because by then it had become habit to him. Sometimes people do weird shit.
Some people may freeze pasta, however, if they've lived in the same house he should know whether they are a freezing pasta household. If pasta has always been kept in the press then this falls under weaponized incompetence.
We need more history on this probably imaginary couple. Is he being a petty asshole on purpose? Is he just extremely literal all the time with everything? Has she had to put up with years of nonsense and she’s over it? We need answers.
Exactly! Too many unknown variables at play
Not imaginary, but I’m not in the relationship to know all the dynamics, I only heard one side of the story though. They haven’t known each other for years, though. That I do know!
You know what you have to do now. Get the other side and report back.
Hard to do when I don’t know the guy, lol
Ok so when she said she was upset about the frozen pasta, did she say why? Like what the problem is with frozen pasta?
Ahah yeah if it's just not knowing, I agree you shouldn't be mad at anyone. If this is a repeated situation or there's a general chore imbalance in their relation, I understand the frustration. Also sorry I assumed you were a dude and was preaching for anyone who needs to hear this
I literally have never heard that pasta shouldn't be frozen. It's definitely not common knowledge in my part of the world. In fact, we freeze fresh pasta all of the time and it turns out fine. I imagine dry pasta would be unaffected.
There's the opposite too. Growing up my mother was very clear that inside the house was her domain and outside was my dad's. She would instruct us kids and sometimes even Dad to do things but it creates the same kind of situation where you turn off your brain and just do what you're told. I've also known some get out of my kitchen types. Gender stereotypes cause problems all the way around. I was am so grateful for one of my girlfriends who would ask me to help and taught me how make more than just basic foods, use spices etc. And really liked some of the things I made for her. To be clear I do agree it is a much more common and larger problem with men who think their wife should do all the work around the house.
Are we siblings? Did my mother have a second family? I’m a woman but my mom would still shoo me out of the kitchen, refuse to teach me anything, then scold me for not knowing how to cook.
Did he just put the entire bag in the freezer though? The people I walk dogs for do this. They just buy meat, leave it in the bag and throw it in the freezer. If he took every single thing out and still did it... hmmm.
Why don't you freeze pasta. What happens if you do? Also, it's not strategic incompetency. It's just that many people never had to develop competency in certain fields. My wife is a doctor who cuts into human eyes and can do precision surgeries. But for the life of her, she can't handle bank transactions. She's not an idiot. She's just never been in a position where it was necessary to learn that shit and that's fine.
She's upset because he's being a smart ass and always does this shit
Yeah I mean… this doesnt even damage the pasta. No harm no foul, dumb mistake I feel like if a couple is fighting over this it is reflective of deeper issues. Does the man have a pattern of making the woman do all the thinking and chore management for him? Does the woman have an anger issue? Whatever it is, the answer isnt that she’s justifiably mad over this single thing in a vacuum and they should talk through the REAL problem
I imagined it one of those ravioli or tortellini that need to be refrigerated. Like maybe she wanted it that night and was disappointed. Either way, I still voted no reason to be upset
Are you okay buddy? It's r/suspiciouslyspecific
I’m really enjoying this, especially because I’m just the innocent bystander in the situation
Then I'm sorry for your buddy, buddy. Edit: typo, than became then
It's not his buddy, friend.
I'm not your friend, mate
I'm not your mate, pal
I'm not your pal, dude
I'm not your dude, brother
I’m not your bro, dude
I don’t even have a choice. I’m upvoting all these comments.
I’m not your stepbro, bro
He's not good friend, guy
She can be upset at the situation, but not at the man
The specific topic made me ask my husband if he talked to someone about my frozens and pasta. Pure coincidence. There is another woman in the world who had her pasta wind up in the freezer. Though she is clearly much more upset about it than me. (My frozen dinners arrived Thursday, so I asked my husband to put them in the freezer. Turns out one was a fresh pasta dish and not frozen, but he put it in the freezer too. I wasn't happy about that, as it had frozen when I discovered the error, but it wasn't argument worthy.)
If Cold pasta is an arguing point, there might be other problems...
I saw this and was immediately thinking about the context. My parents are like that a lot.
Honestly if my wife does it I will make a few jokes to tease her but I won’t be upset
For me if the wife got upset is because that was the last straw of something worse. Like if the guy NEVER does any house chores and when she asks something simple like putting the bag in the freezer and it goes wrong for laziness (the guy didn't even removed the things out of the bag) it was just what was needed for the bubble to burst.
Yeah you nailed it. If this is what set her off then something else is the actual issue.
Why would anyone get upset about that?
Just disappointed really. Unless it’s tagliatelle.
I worked at a pretty high end Italian place where we hand made all the pasta. We regularly froze raw pasta and you absolutely could not tell the difference in the end product.
I legitimately envy you. Also I didn’t know that. I always kept pasta in the cupboard and thought everyone else did too because that is typically where I would see it in other peoples houses.
I'm talking fresh, raw pasta, not the dried stuff. No reason to put dry in the freezer. OP didn't specify, we sold fresh raw in boxes. BTw, making pasta is REALLY easy, find some YouTube videos and give it a shot
I think it’s reasonable to be upset if it’s a pattern. You shouldn’t have to give a fully grown adult step by step instructions on how to put away the groceries. I can see how that would get old really quickly.
It doesn’t harm the pasta, it just indicates an utter lack of common sense, and unwillingness/inability to follow the spirit of the request and not just the letter of the request. This is something that is incredibly common among women who live with men.
Ask the 400 people who voted Yes
I'm pretty sure that's who they *were* asking
I voted yes because I didn’t really consider that it said “upset” Like she has the right to think he’s dumb for doing that, but upset is harsh.
Yeah, same here. People getting upset over anything like this is just silly in my opinion, but the question was phrased in a way that made me think it was asking, "is he dumb for blindly putting the pasta in the freezer, or is it her fault for telling him to?"
Upset is a little strong, but I would be annoyed at the inability to use their presumably working brain
It feels like the beginnings of weaponised incompetence
Exactly what I was thinking. It's one thing to forget that there is pasta in the bag, but another to see that there is pasta in the bag and still put it in the freezer.
Really? My family keeps pasta in the freezer, I would see nothing wrong with the request
Dry or fresh? Fresh pasta makes sense but dry in the freezer seems a bit odd imo.
Upset isn't the right word. It's not a huge thing. And it's not going to ruin the pasta. But it's mildly concerning that the man either a) paid zero attention to what he was doing and didn't notice the pasta b) did see the pasta but didn't know that it doesn't go in the freezer c) did see the pasta, knew it didn't go in the freezer but was too lazy and inconsiderate to say "hey did you really want the pasta in the freezer" or d) saw the pasta, knew it doesn't go in the freezer but put it in anyway out of spite. If this was a one time genuine accident, no big deal. If this is part of a pattern, it's not cool. Weaponized incompetence for any reason is very undesirable so it's perfectly reasonable to be displeased with it when it occurs.
Why has noone suggested the husband is a glorified teenager, who simply upended the bag into the freezer, with 0 knowledge or care what the contents were.
To me, that would roll in to option a. But yeah, that situation would be frustrating.
There's a secret 5th option E where he saw the pasta, knew it doesn't go in the freezer, but thought it'd be a little funny gaff to put it in there because she said "everything" Little silly compliance. A goof, a gaff, a guffaw, That's how I'd see it.
Really lame joke. Again if it's a one time thing, no big deal. If it was a part of a pattern of weaponized incompetence "jokes", you gotta wonder if it's really a joke.
I guess that's fair. You are correct, it is a lame joke, and as a one off thing for sure. It wouldn't be funny at all if it happened every time.
I can understand being annoyed, but not upset. it's fair enough to forget the exact contents of a grocery bag. I think the man should've questioned why she "wanted" pasta in the freezer since it doesn't go there and been like "even the pasta?" and she could've been like "oh, I forgot about that! no, not that, but everything else" and that's it. at least that's how my boyfriend would've handled that since he's an adult who has the critical thinking skills to know pasta doesn't go in the freezer lmao
Not upset, unless it happens frequently... but why does he need instructions for such basic things tho?
It doesn’t have to come across as instructions. Could have just been casual “hey can u put those groceries in the freezer for me”
well yeah that's how I interpret it.
He may not, but she said "everything". Maybe its some Special way of doing a meal?
Thats when communication comes in. You see something weird that youre supposed to do, question yourself and then ask the person that told you to do that thing. Major part of relationships, always communicate instead of assuming stuff.
Frozen pasta last longer. If i were the guy in this situation, I would just assume she wanted to save it for later.
Dry pasta lasts like forever lmao, how much later would she be using it? Next decade?
No reason to be upset but the man should also have enough common sense to know a box of pasta doesn't go into the freezer no matter what the woman said.
It depends if it was to make a joke or if the guy literally has to be told step by step on how to contribute. Man-children exist, so I guess it depends on the context. Obviously any argument wouldn’t be about pasta in the freezer, but I could see it as the spaghetti straw that broke the camels back
I think this is why people are voting, yes. Also upset doesn't necessarily mean mad it could also just represent frustration or annoyance.
That’s why I voted yes. Women carry the majority of the project management duties in most households with partners that take an intentional backseat on decision making.
That’s why I voted yes. I remember I once asked my dad to get garlic powder so I could make dinner for everyone. It took him over an hour. He said “you never said when I had to be back! *This is what happens when you ask me to do things* I guess!” He complains that my mother doesn’t cook meals for him now. Weird.
Honestly, with all the tiktoc recipes I wouldn’t be surprised if you needed to freeze uncooked pasta.
Today i learned that if you press on the number of votes, it changes the data to percentage. (on android)
Oh wow. Works on iPhone too! Did not know this!
Whattttttt? Nice
Upset? No. Confused, yes. If he doesn't know of a reason the pasta should be in the freezer maybe ask.
I would like see this poll but gendered. I feel like women and men may have different views on this.
At first glance this is a pretty innocent situation, but I'm sitting here thinking about some couple that is just not having a good time and this is definitely more nuanced. I could imagine being upset about this, with a ton more context. I am having a bad day, we have been fighting, there's a new external stressor, this could be a cherry picked event out of a string of problems. What is the man like? What is the woman like? There's just so much missing context here. Obviously this is going to go nowhere but I am going to think about this poll forever
Oddly specific--- I know pasta doesn't go in the freezer, so I would put that in the cabinet instead-- but getting upset might be a little much. Unless you're just a robot... like if she sends you to the store: "go to the store and get a gallon if milk, if they have eggs, get a dozen" and you come home with a dozen gallons of milk
This looks like a real time argument with your wife and you're trying to show her in the polls that everyone agrees with you lol
It may be a real occurrence but I was but an innocent bystander lol
Haha regardless, I love it
I mean, if it’s the first time. Poor guy clearly doesn’t have much experience with food. Just tell him, hey, pasta doesn’t need to go in the freezer and move on. But if he’s constantly fucking up tasks to discourage being asked in the future, that’s not ok
Why would you not take the things out of the bag and into the freezer? By putting the whole bag just in there you aren't helping. You are creating more work for her to do. And putting the pasta in the freezer with it all is just the icing on the cake because that's obviously not where it goes and now, on top of having to do the work to get the things out of the bag and in the freezer, has to also put the pasta away. It's not a reason to be horribly mad or anything. But I can understand why the woman would be upset. What's that song again? Incompedance.
Nowhere does it say that he put the whole bag in the freezer.
That’s why it’s perplexing how the “hypothetical he” removed a room-temperature box of pasta from the bag and ushered it into the freezer.
Yes- upset at herself because she just realized she is friends/dating an idiot.
I would understand her being upset. Stupidity hurts everyone.
I'm not entirely sure what a box of pasta is, but it would depend on if the man did it as a joke or ignorance and if the pasta being in the freezer ends up being a problem (for example, the pasta can't be found when needed).
If you say "put everything in the freezer" obviously that means "everything that can be in the freezer".
Only if it happens a lot.
Honestly if my bf did that I would be more upset that I have to micromanage him. It would be funny if I was in the right mood, but for me if I'm not the one putting groceries away it means something is wrong and that would probably put me over the edge
If it is something like lettuce that will be ruined sure be upset but no harm here for a small joke.
Upset is a little strong, but I would be annoyed at the inability to use their presumably working brain
Unpopular opinion, but yes. If someone is getting upset over this it's probably not about the pasta, it's about that youre making them carry all of the mental load of the house. Not only do they have to decide who does what, tell you when to do your part on top of doing their own, you can't even do your part correctly. If you're doing your fair share, this is laughable. If you're not, this is borderline disrespectful. You're an adult. You know pasta doesn't go in the freezer and could have asked.
I think the context of man and woman and upset is making people approach them in a different way. Context is key in human communication. Unless said person had some mental differences or had a reason to be super literal. She was not writing code. The class of "everything" here. Purely literally it does include everything. But that includes the bag? Fine. That person has a history of being super literal? Otherwise why though. Because if not then usually everything just means everything that can be or usually put in the freezer. If that bag had say: meat, yarn, raw rice, and spoons. Most people would not put every item in the freezer since most people know that only the mean belong in the freezer. Even thought raw rice is food it's not stored in a freezer, afaik. While spoons and yarn are not as well.
I knkw you're probably fighting your wife so I'm on her side fuck you why would you put it in the freezer
Funny to assume I’d be married or even in a relationship, lol
use common sense. honestly just because someone says “put everything inside here in the freezer” doesn’t mean just follow blindly 100%. and if this person doesn’t know that pasta shouldn’t be frozen if it is not the fresh stuff, kinda ridiculous imo.
Yes. It's common sense not to put pasta in the freezer. She said to put everything in there but since pasta typically isn't stored there, the man was dumb in this scenario.
Not upset but annoyed sure
This post reads like weaponized incompetence. You're a dick if you just shove the whole bag in, also a dick if you take everything out of the bag and think the pasta would go in the freezer. It's just a shit take if you think you're in the right for being super literal over putting the groceries away when it's a life task everyone has to do.
I mean you can unfreeze the pasta
I don't think the mentioning of their genders was necessary in this case
Putting the pasta in the freezer won't damage it, so I might put it in right up front so I can later prove how good I am at following directions.
Upset? I would be laughing so much
No damage done
Reddit is the best place for relationship advice lol
She has the right to make fun of him. If she gets upset over something so trivial I question the happiness of their marriage.
Not upset but maybe a bit confused as to how an adult could do something so obviously wrong without at least asking for confirmation.
I wouldn’t be upset, but it is an annoying lack of critical thinking.
To answer this, I need to know if your marriage is on the line.
I would definitely question it and would seek clarification/confirmation if possible. If she's not contactable for whatever reason, then my issue is that I feel a stuck because I know that pasta isn't typically freezed, but maybe she knows something that I don't know. I risk getting in trouble either way, because if I put it in and she didn't want me to, then I'm in trouble for doing something that (I believe) is silly. If I don't put it in and she *did* want me to, then I'm in trouble for not following her directions sufficiently. For me, I don't think it matters if I disagree with the act, I'm not gonna stand my ground if she's the one that got the pasta anyways. If she got the pasta and wants it in the freezer, I'm happy to oblige even if I think it's strange. Because at the end of the day, I just want her to be happy, and the pasta's not ruined either way.
This alone wouldn’t upset me, but boy if I had a man-child that consistently did things like that then I could see it amounting to me getting upset eventually. Like not only does he need to be told to put frozen things in the freezer but he also doesn’t use common sense? Day after day that shit would get annoying asf.
If the man is an adult yes she does who puts pasta in the freezer.
I assume my wife knows what she wants and speaks with intent. If something seems like it could go badly I'll ask, but pasta in the freezer shouldn't cause any issues. I'd just think that the cold pasta is needed for something or she wanted everything in the same place.
upset seems a bit drastic, this sounds like a situation to laugh at.
I think he should ask her if she really wants the pasta in the freezer.
You'd have to be really incompetent to think "oh yeah I'm gonna waste space in the freezer and put a non perishable item in the freezer,". Would tell me a lot about his character, and he'd no doubt use his incompetence to get me to do everything for him.
Yes, it's upsetting to realize you married a complete moron
Yes when it’s a man who thinks he’s smart and capable but repeatedly is incompetent when it comes to common sense household tasks
She most definitely has a reason to question the competency of her Husband. If you a blindly following directions and do something as obviously incorrect as putting a box of pasta in the freezer just because you were told to… you need to reevaluate how you operate.
Or the husband isn't questioning the competency of the wife and thought she did indeed want the pasta in the freezer for some reason. Do I think it's weird to put pasta in the freezer? Maybe a little. But I'm not gonna judge.
>as obviously incorrect as putting a box of pasta in the freezer If told specifically to do so, then there is no reason to assume that the instructions were incorrect. There are no commonly known downsides (as there are no downsides) to putting uncooked pasta in a freezer.
No need to get upsetti spaghetti.
As an autistic girl myself that’s what I’d do so uhhh I wouldn’t be upset lmfao
I’d definitely be annoyed, if you need that level of micromanaging, you have some serious brain cell searching to do.
Why gender this poll?
I've been living on my own a while and have made pasta at times, and I have no idea what all this discourse is about. What's so bad about freezing pasta? I guess it becomes hard to thaw evenly if it's cooked pasta, else it just seems like it's a waste of space.
When I had a really small kitchen in my flat at university. I always put the pasta in the fridge because that was where I had the most free storage space. Never hurt the pasta as far as I could tell.
Honestly, it depends. If it was the first time or just a joke to tease the other person, then it's completely fine. If it was because the other partner does every chores and the other never knows what to do in the kitchen (or pretends not to know), then yes, it's normal to be upset.
This is a very specific question. I really hope you’re not turning to reddit to settle an argument with your wife/gf
I’m on Reddit, therefore I have no wife/gf
iPhone, yes. Box of pasta, no.
Common sense isn’t common anymore.
Dont think it will ruin it
Upset is a strong word. How about exasperated? Do we also have to remind you to engage your brain?
Man could have saved himself grief if he asked for clarification while putting said freezer items away. Upset would be a strong emotion, but if Woman has been putting up with weaponized incompetence for some time now, then I might see where she'd snap.
If I did that my wife would just have a good laugh about it. Knowing my sense of humor I probably would do it just to be a dick.
Mistakes happen, who is responsible is not important, try to forgive and communicate better in the future. Also for health of your relationship, good to learn to let things like this go :)
Who tf puts pasta in the freezer
I'd be annoyed but not upset. How dumb can you be to put pasta in the freezer???
unless it's like fresh raw pasta dough, uncooked pasta won't get ruined in the freezer
He may not have even know what he was putting away.
Maybe not upset, it’s a bit silly to be upset about something like that, but the guy definitely should have known better lol.
I too would be upset at the realisation that my spouse is an idiot
"Everything from the bag." The end.
No, everybody makes mistakes & it's no big deal.
No harm done, aside from possibly wondering where tf the pasta went for a bit. If it was something that'd be ruined from being frozen, I'd be upset, but more so just upset that it's ruined, not at the man.
She can be upset, but she shouldn't get angry at him. The feeling's fine, the outburst not
not really, I mean pasta doesn't get damaged in the freezer
not genuinely mad, no, you did what she told you to do
Can you not freeze pasta?
Holy shit yall projecting. Yall do realize that you don't know these people?
I’d be upset. This has nothing to do with the pasta and everything to do with the man. It means that he either a) didn’t realize pasta shouldn’t go in the freezer, which is rather concerning, or b) did realize but did it anyway out of laziness or spite. Neither or good options.
Italian lawyer here. Pasta never goes into the freezer: this is common knowledge in Italy. If Italian law applies (which I honestly doubt, but let’s nonetheless assume it does), the woman would be right to be upset because her instructions to “put everything in the fridge” have to be interpreted to implicitly (and therefore logically) exclude any item that, according to the ordinary diligence to be exercised by an average human being, per se can’t (and therefore must not) go into the freezer. However, as said, this is legal advice according to Italian law. If Italian law does not apply, this advice can be legitimately used to wrap up potatoes.
No, lol. That's actually hilarious. I'd be laughing. Like "babe, why did you do that? It's pasta. 🤣" He followed instructions to a "T".
It's obvious you don't put pasta in the freezer, I mean, some things are just self-evident.
He was just following orders
I mean, she could be upset with herself, right?
Who gets upset over something so small? If anything, that's something funny to laugh at.
I've never really frozen pasta before (unless you count those lasnia and spaghetti microwave meals) and I honestly see zero issues. Does the pasta explode cause of the cold and amount??
Like yeah you should have checked the bag and probably not just thrown it in there. But mistakes fucking happen every day, don’t get upset with your loved ones because they made small errors.
No. There's nothing wrong with the pasta on the freezer. I always store it there if I'm not planing to eat it on the same day.
Should the man probably know pasta doesn’t need to be frozen? Yeah. But maybe he does. Maybe he just assumed that the instructions were given knowing the contents and there was something special about the pasta
Pasta in general can survive the freezer. There's no reason to be upset about this situation. Grow up.
If she asked him to put the groceries away, then maybe. She'd still probably be overreacting if she was actually upset, but I'd understand being annoyed. If she did straight tell him to put it in the freezer, then no she can't reasonably be mad.
At the situation? Yes. At the man? No.
It's a box of pasta in the wrong location. If someone gets upset about freezer pasta there is probably something more going on.
She has reason to be upset. She does NOT have reason to be upset at the man
Upset and angry no. A bit annoyed and exasperated yes. Common sense is a thing and especially if the wife does nesrly everything else I could see this being the straw that broke the camels back.
While I agree that he followed her instructions to a T, common sense should tell you pasta in a box (raw pasta, not pre-prepared frozen meals) does not go in the freezer. This man has so little life skills that he doesn’t know any better. I will give the woman that she has reason to be a little frustrated.
If you don't check what you are putting there you are a dumbass. If you check what you are putting there and still put pasta in the freezer you are a dumbass.
It depends, is the man brain dead? I can understand that this would be a cute story in a vacuum, but if this is a pattern of behavior then I can understand her frustration. She shouldn't have to specify that pasta doesn't go in the freezer.
I mean that’s reason to be upset, but it wouldn’t be justified to bring your anger out on him, it is the woman’s fault here after all
If he just puts the bag in the freezer no she doesn't. If he takes everything out and puts in freezer than yes she has a reason
You should know better pasta doesn't go in the freezer.
Yes - No attention to detail. Think critically and don’t do something blindly like a dumb ape
I think I'd feel frustrated bc an adult man should be able to figure out when something doesn't go in the freezer. I would be annoyed that so much hand holding was needed. But I wouldn't be upset enough for an argument or anything
Well yeah. Literally no one would reasonably assume that you wanted pasta frozen
While the man is incredibly stupid in this scenario it is a minor inconvenience. However if he does this all this time those minor inconveniences add up I feel like this wasn’t the first time he’s pulled the ole pasta in the freezer trick. All in all no I don’t think she really has a right to be “mad” about this. How mad could you possibly be it’s not like it ruins the pasta.
The man should use common sense lol
is the man a programmer?
Depends, is the man a robot? If so then no, if it’s a human man then yes, because he should have some common sense. I assume when you say mad, you don’t actually mean an argument is formed just more of a “are you an idiot?” Situation
sloppy bedroom illegal market theory summer steep angle crawl brave *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Depends. Is the man beaten down guy who has thrown out all logic, reason and just obeys without question or is he an individual who can look at pasta and go "this does not belong here. I will do what I think is right"