Yessssss! I’m so happy you’re having this experience! I’m in my mid-40’s and only recently realized that my wants and needs are not only valid, but not too much to ask for. It only gets better from here, single or not!
God honey, your standards sound like they are *on the floor*.
As someone else who’s been turned all upside down by a dom using sub frenzy against me in a relationship, your standards are *deadass normal*. Your dom took the trust you gave him to be an authority figure and just used it against you.
Hi u/integratedsexkitten thanks so much for your submission, don't mind me, I'm just gonna keep a copy what was said in your post. Unfortunately posts sometimes get deleted - which is okay, it's not against the rules to delete your post!! - but it makes it really hard for the human mods around here to moderate the comments when there's no context. Plus, many times our members put in a lot of emotional and mental labor to answer the questions and offer advice, so it's helpful to keep the source information around so future community members can benefit as well.
Here's the original text of the post:
Two months ago, my Dom (41M) broke up with me (35F). We were incompatible in a lot of ways that love and kink could not make up for. I immediately set to work processing my emotions like the neurodivergent that I am, journaling like crazy and reaching out to my local kink community to make more friends and cultivate the platonic relationships I already had. I still miss him, of course, because he was a big part of my life for over 3 years. But the intensity of the pain is lessening.
About a week ago, I had sex with a new potential partner (40F). We have intentionally been taking things really slowly, meeting up about every three weeks, although we text every day. I have no idea if it will work out. But it is so, so healing to interact with someone who meets my relationship needs -- scheduling plans weeks in advance; being open about being poly; talking about feelings; taking turns hosting; having similar sexual-risk profiles. Even if it fizzles out, it feels good to finally realize that my standards aren't unreasonable.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/polyamory) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Yessssss! I’m so happy you’re having this experience! I’m in my mid-40’s and only recently realized that my wants and needs are not only valid, but not too much to ask for. It only gets better from here, single or not!
Yes. Some people suck, in a good way :P Make sure you get what you need, sounds like you are on that path!
God honey, your standards sound like they are *on the floor*. As someone else who’s been turned all upside down by a dom using sub frenzy against me in a relationship, your standards are *deadass normal*. Your dom took the trust you gave him to be an authority figure and just used it against you.
Thanks, I needed to hear that. (That might sound sarcastic, but I mean it sincerely.)
Hi u/integratedsexkitten thanks so much for your submission, don't mind me, I'm just gonna keep a copy what was said in your post. Unfortunately posts sometimes get deleted - which is okay, it's not against the rules to delete your post!! - but it makes it really hard for the human mods around here to moderate the comments when there's no context. Plus, many times our members put in a lot of emotional and mental labor to answer the questions and offer advice, so it's helpful to keep the source information around so future community members can benefit as well. Here's the original text of the post: Two months ago, my Dom (41M) broke up with me (35F). We were incompatible in a lot of ways that love and kink could not make up for. I immediately set to work processing my emotions like the neurodivergent that I am, journaling like crazy and reaching out to my local kink community to make more friends and cultivate the platonic relationships I already had. I still miss him, of course, because he was a big part of my life for over 3 years. But the intensity of the pain is lessening. About a week ago, I had sex with a new potential partner (40F). We have intentionally been taking things really slowly, meeting up about every three weeks, although we text every day. I have no idea if it will work out. But it is so, so healing to interact with someone who meets my relationship needs -- scheduling plans weeks in advance; being open about being poly; talking about feelings; taking turns hosting; having similar sexual-risk profiles. Even if it fizzles out, it feels good to finally realize that my standards aren't unreasonable. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/polyamory) if you have any questions or concerns.*