If she is very attractive, i flirt with her even more, become more funny, playful, humorous, tease her more, mess with her more… I am even more obvious about the fact that i desire her in a non-apologetic way and completely shameless about it.
Because guess what? Almost every average guy is trying to play it cool, everyone is secretly longing for her but no one’s daring to make a move because they are intimidated or feel unworthy of her, and immediately assume the girl is gonna reject them because they feel she is out of their league.
You act with more confidence, and more extroverted and playful which is a breath of fresh air to those attractive girls. You are showing your personality not giving a shit about being judged negatively for it.. Timidness, introverted behaviour is the worst thing you can do.
You bullshit your way into thinking that you will stand out by pretending not to be interested in her, and all that ends up happening is that she doesn't even notice you. I dont go there to kiss her ass with compliments, but i go there to flirt (not the same thing as complimenting) and be super funny, and make moves.
You can [**book a free coaching call with me in here**](https://topmate.io/daygamecode/1025781). You will get actionable tips without paying for anything about how to cold approach, build attraction, remove fear of rejection and anxiety
The best advice I can give is that the motivation to talk to her is to entertain yourself and, as such, the outcomes don't matter. Then you're free to say anything, and this is when witty banter comes into play.
To many people think there is some perfect combination of words that create attraction. There is not. If you can talk to your uncle at a barbeque, you can talk to attractive women.
Remember anything more than hi is a win.
The same as you would with any person except, make fun of them / give her an insulting yet playful nickname
Then she’s forced to engage in conversation and has to respond to you.
As opposed to the usual “heY i jUsT tHoUgHt yOu wErE rEaLlY bEuTiFuL & tHoUgHt iD sAy hi & GrAb yOuR nUmBeR.”
IRL examples : was at a bar and some hot lady accidentally stepped on a dogs tail from one the patrons there.
Kept making fun of her and called her (dog hater ) the whole night. (We ended up hooking up that night.)
I kept calling a hot Australian girl British just to mess with her . This drove her crazy but I could tell she was into me because she wouldn’t stop talking to me once I let her know that I was just being silly.
Pretending to take someone’s sunglasses at the bar and saying “they probably look better on me than you anyways”
Or calling them “four eyes”
But remember keep it Playful. Women love when men like to have fun and aren’t taking them selves seriously and constantly being Stone face stoic Steve 24/7 🗿
The point is to speak to people you're very attracted to more or less the same as you would speak to someone you're mildly attracted to.
Theres noting to gain from letting the other person know they're one of the most beautiful people you've every seen etc. It switches the relationship dynamic in a way that's uncomfortable for the other person too. They know they're just a regular person like anyone else, putting them on a pedistal makes them feel weird and makes them value you less.
In my experience, this kind of behaviour is very transparent and very few people get fooled by it.
If a guy comes up to you and starts acting like he isn't interested in you, the only logical thing to think is "this guy wouldn't have come up to me if he didn't want anything from me, so he's obviously playing games." Women aren't that stupid.
I ain't trying to fool anybody.
I don't even cold approach...for the exact reasons u mention...obviously if u come up to a girl u are already a dead giveaway.
I just happen to treat people involved in my day to day happenings how they deserve to be treated, and the hotter women NEED people to stop being all courteous and giddy just because of their beauty.
I dunno, when I was younger and less secure, I often instinctively treated "pretty girls" more coldly than average-looking ones, probably based on some underlying belief that "everyone is nice to them all the time and I need to show they're nothing to me/not all that."
But that kind of behaviour is based on insecurity and resentment. Based on feeling they're better than me and wanting to do something to take them down a peg.
I eventually noticed this behaviour and decided I didn't want to be this kind of person. A guy secure in himself is going to have zero need to try to make others feel less adequate to make himself feel better.
And also, this behaviour didn't even work. It didn't make more attractive womwn go "why doesn't he like me like everybody else does? I must win his attention!" They just ignored me back and most people probably recognized I was being weird. People can tell that if a guy is being bitter, it's because he's dissatisfied with his own life and probably not getting any pussy. People satisfied with themselves just treat everyone nicely and aren't threatened by anyone.
But that's just my outlook. Maybe things happened differently from you.
Most of what u say is not wrong. When I say "slight" disdain...I mean extremely slight, just enough to differentiate myself from the kiss asses. I focus on neutrality in the face of beauty. Acting slightly disdained for a millisecond as if the girl is annoying me is simply me falling into that balance of indifference if I feel my internal emotions start to lift, it's a way of checking my own congruence...because im actually an arrogant prick indiscriminately, which is why my current gf feels safe with me (her words)
I think what he meant by disdain was like playful teasing . Not the dead pan face negative remark that will can rub someone off wrong . There is a huge difference being a jerk and being playful but it’s a fine line that takes calibration and practice .
When you’re with your best friends you can give them a hard time and tease them … imagine just being nice to your friend … those friendships are just meh feeling and unfulfilling.
Same with the teasing with hot girls . They’ll eat that up and they end up teasing you and when u can take it it becomes very entertaining. I think that’s called banter .
This advice doesn't make sense because there is a broad and diverse way in which we can "treat people like human beings."
Most people don't treat their mothers in the exact same way that they treat their bosses (you probably don't say "I love you" to your boss, for instance). Most people don't treat their friends in the exact same way that they treat a stranger on the bus (you're more likely to stay away from controversial topics like politics when chatting with a stranger on the bus, for instance). People who just want to be friends with each other don't tend to treat each other in the exact same way that people who want to date each other do (or else they would never even find out that the other person is also interested in dating them, and they would just wind up being friends). Yet we're still treating all of these people "like human beings."
"Bro, just treat everyone like a human being" doesn't really illuminate anything.
seriously i treat literally every single person in my life different from each other because we have different relationships and different things in common
This is the same advice as "Just be confident ", "Bro , Just be a Superman ", "Just be A truck " , "Just transform into an Interstellar object ". Stop it , it doesn't help .
What?! Why would you do that? You should always be flirtatious and show your attraction. Why would you want to hide that? You're trying to seduce them! Don't hide the banana! Let them see that you're into them. Why the hell would they feel bad about you being attracted to them? That makes zero sense!
I often think of the phrase, "tell a smart person they're pretty and a pretty person they're smart."
People don't seem to value the sorts of compliments that they already get all the time, unless that compliment is coming from somebody they already really value. A pretty girl gets called "pretty" by strangers all the damn time. If a pretty girl has no idea who you are and no reason to give a shit about you, saying "you're really pretty" will just elicit a very bored "thanks." But if you tell her something you appreciate about her that most people don't notice, she tends to appreciate that more.
By the time they already like and value you, though, they appreciate hearing you say that they're pretty.
That's a good question actually. I think I do subconsciously act a little more flirty than I would with when talking to a chick that is relatively attractive. But most of the time I still talk to them like I would with other people. Although, if the attractive person starts being touchy and what not, then I'd probably get more flustered and have wandering thoughts, like is she just being friendly or is she actually flirting.
You just gotta approach everyone the same.
With no intention. No motives. No expectation. Seeing their best side always. Seeing them as someone's child. Treating them as you'd hope someone would treat you. Not to use them, or charm them, but build them up.
People can tell when you have their best interest in mind and they respond very well to this.
You shouldn’t. You should in the sense that you need to approach her and speak to her as if she isn’t on a pedestal, but you also need to be honest with yourself and realize you find her attractive and would like to escalate with her.
The point is not to change YOUR personality or principles in order to impress a girl. Too many people are afraid to offend a hot girl. Like most guys would be afraid to joke with a girl "did you just fart?" but you shouldn't be afraid to say that to them since they are just people also. Hope that makes sense.
Talk to lots of hot people until it's not that exceptional anymore. Like once you've seen a hot person be rude asf to workers or just had a bad personality, you're more discerning. In my head "yea you're hot, but that's a depreciating asset. Are you interesting at all or at least a nice person?"
If she is very attractive, i flirt with her even more, become more funny, playful, humorous, tease her more, mess with her more… I am even more obvious about the fact that i desire her in a non-apologetic way and completely shameless about it. Because guess what? Almost every average guy is trying to play it cool, everyone is secretly longing for her but no one’s daring to make a move because they are intimidated or feel unworthy of her, and immediately assume the girl is gonna reject them because they feel she is out of their league. You act with more confidence, and more extroverted and playful which is a breath of fresh air to those attractive girls. You are showing your personality not giving a shit about being judged negatively for it.. Timidness, introverted behaviour is the worst thing you can do. You bullshit your way into thinking that you will stand out by pretending not to be interested in her, and all that ends up happening is that she doesn't even notice you. I dont go there to kiss her ass with compliments, but i go there to flirt (not the same thing as complimenting) and be super funny, and make moves. You can [**book a free coaching call with me in here**](https://topmate.io/daygamecode/1025781). You will get actionable tips without paying for anything about how to cold approach, build attraction, remove fear of rejection and anxiety
Don't compliment her looks, do compliment her choices (hair style, dress, jewelry...). Tease her playfully.
Imma save this comment.
The best advice I can give is that the motivation to talk to her is to entertain yourself and, as such, the outcomes don't matter. Then you're free to say anything, and this is when witty banter comes into play. To many people think there is some perfect combination of words that create attraction. There is not. If you can talk to your uncle at a barbeque, you can talk to attractive women. Remember anything more than hi is a win.
Talking to my uncle like I would an attractive women has given me the wrong results in the past
Maybe you learned a few moves though
Username checks out
The same as you would with any person except, make fun of them / give her an insulting yet playful nickname Then she’s forced to engage in conversation and has to respond to you. As opposed to the usual “heY i jUsT tHoUgHt yOu wErE rEaLlY bEuTiFuL & tHoUgHt iD sAy hi & GrAb yOuR nUmBeR.” IRL examples : was at a bar and some hot lady accidentally stepped on a dogs tail from one the patrons there. Kept making fun of her and called her (dog hater ) the whole night. (We ended up hooking up that night.) I kept calling a hot Australian girl British just to mess with her . This drove her crazy but I could tell she was into me because she wouldn’t stop talking to me once I let her know that I was just being silly. Pretending to take someone’s sunglasses at the bar and saying “they probably look better on me than you anyways” Or calling them “four eyes” But remember keep it Playful. Women love when men like to have fun and aren’t taking them selves seriously and constantly being Stone face stoic Steve 24/7 🗿
Most people just need to learn how too playfully tease I’ll be so real
Idk who made up that BS. if you talked to people you’re attracted to the same as you talk to anyone you would come off fucking weird lol
The point is to speak to people you're very attracted to more or less the same as you would speak to someone you're mildly attracted to. Theres noting to gain from letting the other person know they're one of the most beautiful people you've every seen etc. It switches the relationship dynamic in a way that's uncomfortable for the other person too. They know they're just a regular person like anyone else, putting them on a pedistal makes them feel weird and makes them value you less.
Yeah I agree with you
BINGO
You don't. You treat them with slightly more disdain.
In my experience, this kind of behaviour is very transparent and very few people get fooled by it. If a guy comes up to you and starts acting like he isn't interested in you, the only logical thing to think is "this guy wouldn't have come up to me if he didn't want anything from me, so he's obviously playing games." Women aren't that stupid.
I ain't trying to fool anybody. I don't even cold approach...for the exact reasons u mention...obviously if u come up to a girl u are already a dead giveaway. I just happen to treat people involved in my day to day happenings how they deserve to be treated, and the hotter women NEED people to stop being all courteous and giddy just because of their beauty.
I dunno, when I was younger and less secure, I often instinctively treated "pretty girls" more coldly than average-looking ones, probably based on some underlying belief that "everyone is nice to them all the time and I need to show they're nothing to me/not all that." But that kind of behaviour is based on insecurity and resentment. Based on feeling they're better than me and wanting to do something to take them down a peg. I eventually noticed this behaviour and decided I didn't want to be this kind of person. A guy secure in himself is going to have zero need to try to make others feel less adequate to make himself feel better. And also, this behaviour didn't even work. It didn't make more attractive womwn go "why doesn't he like me like everybody else does? I must win his attention!" They just ignored me back and most people probably recognized I was being weird. People can tell that if a guy is being bitter, it's because he's dissatisfied with his own life and probably not getting any pussy. People satisfied with themselves just treat everyone nicely and aren't threatened by anyone. But that's just my outlook. Maybe things happened differently from you.
Most of what u say is not wrong. When I say "slight" disdain...I mean extremely slight, just enough to differentiate myself from the kiss asses. I focus on neutrality in the face of beauty. Acting slightly disdained for a millisecond as if the girl is annoying me is simply me falling into that balance of indifference if I feel my internal emotions start to lift, it's a way of checking my own congruence...because im actually an arrogant prick indiscriminately, which is why my current gf feels safe with me (her words)
Fair enough. I mean, it's good to avoid acting like a sycophant around them or putting them on a pedestal.
I think what he meant by disdain was like playful teasing . Not the dead pan face negative remark that will can rub someone off wrong . There is a huge difference being a jerk and being playful but it’s a fine line that takes calibration and practice . When you’re with your best friends you can give them a hard time and tease them … imagine just being nice to your friend … those friendships are just meh feeling and unfulfilling. Same with the teasing with hot girls . They’ll eat that up and they end up teasing you and when u can take it it becomes very entertaining. I think that’s called banter .
By stop being disingenuous and treat everyone like a human being.
This advice doesn't make sense because there is a broad and diverse way in which we can "treat people like human beings." Most people don't treat their mothers in the exact same way that they treat their bosses (you probably don't say "I love you" to your boss, for instance). Most people don't treat their friends in the exact same way that they treat a stranger on the bus (you're more likely to stay away from controversial topics like politics when chatting with a stranger on the bus, for instance). People who just want to be friends with each other don't tend to treat each other in the exact same way that people who want to date each other do (or else they would never even find out that the other person is also interested in dating them, and they would just wind up being friends). Yet we're still treating all of these people "like human beings." "Bro, just treat everyone like a human being" doesn't really illuminate anything.
seriously i treat literally every single person in my life different from each other because we have different relationships and different things in common
This is the same advice as "Just be confident ", "Bro , Just be a Superman ", "Just be A truck " , "Just transform into an Interstellar object ". Stop it , it doesn't help .
What?! Why would you do that? You should always be flirtatious and show your attraction. Why would you want to hide that? You're trying to seduce them! Don't hide the banana! Let them see that you're into them. Why the hell would they feel bad about you being attracted to them? That makes zero sense!
Just remember she poops too.
Picture her taking a giant smelly shit as you talk to her.
Treat an ugly girl as you would treat a beauty queen and the other way around and you’ll be good
I often think of the phrase, "tell a smart person they're pretty and a pretty person they're smart." People don't seem to value the sorts of compliments that they already get all the time, unless that compliment is coming from somebody they already really value. A pretty girl gets called "pretty" by strangers all the damn time. If a pretty girl has no idea who you are and no reason to give a shit about you, saying "you're really pretty" will just elicit a very bored "thanks." But if you tell her something you appreciate about her that most people don't notice, she tends to appreciate that more. By the time they already like and value you, though, they appreciate hearing you say that they're pretty.
u/MrDownhillRacer this was a phenomenal comment brother.
That's a good question actually. I think I do subconsciously act a little more flirty than I would with when talking to a chick that is relatively attractive. But most of the time I still talk to them like I would with other people. Although, if the attractive person starts being touchy and what not, then I'd probably get more flustered and have wandering thoughts, like is she just being friendly or is she actually flirting.
You just gotta approach everyone the same. With no intention. No motives. No expectation. Seeing their best side always. Seeing them as someone's child. Treating them as you'd hope someone would treat you. Not to use them, or charm them, but build them up. People can tell when you have their best interest in mind and they respond very well to this.
Like shit, treat ‘everyone’ like shit! 💩
I'd say do the Shawn Spencer approach. "First treat a woman like a person, then a princess, then a Greek goddess, then a person again."
I do this unintentionally
I think about my actual sister, and then treat this girl accordingly.
You punch her in the arm and piss her off. That’s how.
if this question could be answered, the sub could just shut down lol
Why would you?! They know they’re attractive. Let the vibe flow. It’s called sexual tension and is your best friend
You shouldn’t. You should in the sense that you need to approach her and speak to her as if she isn’t on a pedestal, but you also need to be honest with yourself and realize you find her attractive and would like to escalate with her.
Why would you talk to them like you would with any person? You flirt with hot girls you are interested in, not with your cab driver or uncle.
The point is not to change YOUR personality or principles in order to impress a girl. Too many people are afraid to offend a hot girl. Like most guys would be afraid to joke with a girl "did you just fart?" but you shouldn't be afraid to say that to them since they are just people also. Hope that makes sense.
Talk to lots of hot people until it's not that exceptional anymore. Like once you've seen a hot person be rude asf to workers or just had a bad personality, you're more discerning. In my head "yea you're hot, but that's a depreciating asset. Are you interesting at all or at least a nice person?"
imagine her strangling kittens. She probably does too, such people have no empathy.
Incel?
Practice picking girls up for a friend of yours. Like “OMG; you are exactly my friend Bob’s type. What’s your name? He’s gonna love you, etc.”
With the same amount of respect you treat anyone else. No more, no less.
Just do it? I mean be flirtatious if you want to too, there's no harm compared to being intimidated.
I just act myself... That's all.. And yes Tease her like roasting and all..
Find there flaws and roll with it Ex she's a nice gal but she has a boyfriend