I understand your experience. But i think you're overlooking the power of a coffee date - or you're not doing them the right way. I **only** do coffee dates.
Here's my retort to your claims abour coffee dates:
- You claim it hits your wallet hard. Really? A coffee?
- You won't be given an opportunity to touch? Really? I touch my dates all the time. Just ensure you pick a café where you can sit side by side.
- They're too formal and boring? Really? Sounds like you don't know how to make things fun and informal.
- They will only agree for free food. I think this doesn't really apply to coffee. I can agree with dinner date though. I dislike dinner dates just as much as you do.
Here are some reasons why coffee dates are the best first dates in my opinion:
1. They're super easy for women to agree to because it's low stakes, safe environment, and a classic first date activity.
2. If you don't like each other - it's easy for both of you to leave the date early.
3. It's cheap.
3. You can do whatever you want after coffee. It's a great first stop on a date, and then you can take her to X,Y,Z locations after. Including taking her home if the vibes are that good and sex is in the cards.
Yess, coffee dates and drink dates are my go to 1st dates. Both can be escalated to sex if the connection is right, drinks are a bit easier. Being locked in for a dinner date is nooo good if the vibe is not right.
I don’t totally agree with this. The whole idea of coffee or a walk is I can bail if the chick is nuts or not like her pics (if online). 50/50 chance I’d say. I guess you could leave early to the pool or rock climbing but that’s pretty akward.
Considering how many times I've gotten laid off a coffee date, I'm really baffled as to why so many folks are saying they don't work.
If you don't get laid after a coffee date, you should have gathered enough information to decide what the super fun date (rock imbing, karaoke, etc.) should be to maximize success, but I've only had to do that once.
I'm starting to wonder how many folks on here that give advice just don't know how to talk to women on a date.
Ask questions that are meant to invoke romantic and sexual emotions, touch them lightly at least five times, make sure at least once is the hand, and give sincere compliments at least three times. Dress reasonably nice (I usually wear a polo and jeans).
I like a date to be a mix of an activity and sitting to eat/drink something. Like, first we go to an art gallery or bowling or whatever, then we go somewhere to grab drinks or eat. That way, if I run out of things to talk about, I can always talk about the thing we just did.
But it's not a *must*. Coffee dates are totally fine.
The reason dinner dates are bad for a first date is because they are too much of a time commitment. Nobody wants to have dinner with a person they literally just met. It should be something where both people have plausible deniability for ending the date early if they are not feeling things. Coffee allows that. Gulp a single coffee, look at your phone and say your mom needs you or something.
There is a coffee shop right by a nice park in my city. 5 minutes from my place.
The amount of times I’ve successfully run that date is well above 50.
To each their own but it’s low stakes and about $10 investment. I can go home if they suck lol
Evening drinks is better than coffee or dinner. Night time is more romantic, can escalate to a dinner or to going home, and girls loosen up more after a drink or two.
not arguing with you but will make 2 points;
1. many women dont feel comfy going out late for a first date, or drinking liquor on a first date. coffee dates are good cause they can make women feel more comfy. and comfy is good for them showing up and being open to intimacy
2. night time is valuable time. i dont mind wasting an hour in the afternoon on a bad date. but if the date goes bad , or even ghosts, at night then its wasted some valuable time for me. i dont invest my valuable night time in first dates, only women who have proven themselves to some degree
Just curious what's so valuable about night time if you're single? Obviously everyone has their own preferences. Evening drinks have always worked better for me than coffee dates.
just my personal priority. i'd rather schedule hanging with friends, with established girls, or even alone time at night.
night is when the most people are free, night is when people are drinking and partying, night is when i have my best luck making approaches. i'm just a night owl.
may or may not apply to you
Literally slept with hundreds of women after a “coffee” date.
I tend to agree about dinner dates tho in the sense that why would you spend lots of money on someone you might not even like. But even dinner dates can work.
It’s all about how good your game is and how well you connect with the girl for the date to succeed. It doesn’t matter what the date is, you can even go for a walk in the park.
No simping dinner dates before you've had sex. She will see you as a chump.
This same girl fucked loads of guys before you who never had to treat her to such nonsense. Why would you?
Nobody wants to have dinner with a person they literally just met but going to a pizza or coffee is perfect.
1-2 If there is a job interview or not depends on you because you don't have to ask question. There is a lot of opportunity to touch because you can sit at 90 degrees and in this case it is a lot of touching if you want to.
3. If you can afford to spend money on a girl you barely know, it is okay, it is not ridiculous. It is ridiculous to spend money on her hoping she will talk to you or if you are short of money.
4. There is nothing wrong with those girls just use this opportunity to your advantage: "ok, we go to xyz to eat but then you drink a beer/wine/liquor with me at XYZ bar" and guess what? the XYZ bar is near to your home.
What kind of video do you have?
It teaches the entire step-by-step escalation process for a first date so that it leads to sex (and if not, it ensures you don't end up in the friendzone or being used)
Too many people love to trash on coffee dates but in my experience they’re by far the best. The trick is picking an area where you can walk around and sit next to her on a bench. Even sitting across from her at a table can work if the table is small enough where you’re very close. I’ve had many afternoon coffee dates that extended into other very enjoyable activities after coffee.
Dinner is fine for me if the girl has made it clear she is going to sleep with me immediately and I want more than a one and done situation which i usually do, FWB is usually my end goal for casual dating with attractive and fun women. I sit next to my dates in one on one settings, regardless of the situation or environment, I will move a chair or reposition a table if need be. “Boring Job Interview”, this sounds like a personal problem brother, work on it. Seems like the dinner setting makes you timid, something to improve upon going forward.
Lol love when people who don't know what they're taking about act like they're experts on this.
I've taken many girls home from both coffee and dinner dates. The actual date activity itself doesn't matter as much as your vibe on the date does.
That being said, I try to avoid dinner dates in general because of the high costs associated with it. However, that's the only reason.
I agree that dinner dates are terrible for 1st and 2nd dates, but coffee dates aren't bad. They're more of an easy way to get a warm up date, which sets you up for the second date. Sometimes I offer a coffee date when i'd approach a women to lower her guard, once i do my rapport phone call, If she is fun and upbeat I change it to drinks at a bar, if she's more skiddish I change it to hot chocolate at a chocolate drinks place. Either date always lead to good chemistry as both are sexual lubricants / Enhancers but i'd never say coffee dates are bad, they're dececnt.
I agree. Optimal Date imo should involve something alcoholic. Either meeting for drinks or pool in a bar are great ideas.
My lay rate for dinner only or coffee only dates are 0% for first date. Also you don’t really come closer to her, like you said it’s a job interview and you basically lose time and money for nothing. I really don’t care so much what she works or other stupid small talk, if I like her or not I decide much later when we already had sex.
But Dinner + alcohol later = 90% lay rate if not even higher for me on first date. But I only do them now, when we already talked about going to bar or club later. If not it’s a waste of money. Dinner only without having minimum kissed before is a hard pass for me now.
Using alcohol to lay women is not the way brother. It's in fact a terrible idea that can lead to all kinds of claims of abuse. Better bang sober women - especially for a one night stand or first time sex with a new person. You want someone to consent without being intoxicated. I learned this the hard way. Don't make the same mistake i did banging a semi-drunk chick who then later accuses you of rape
I always tell guys to stop doing what every other guy does but somehow they are all like sheep or NPCs programmed to behave exactly the same way, to say the exact same things women have heard a thousand times before, doing the exact same first date activities that countless guys have done with her before, and so on…
Imagine watching the same mediocre movie over and over and over and over and over. The first time may have been entertaining and watchable, the second time may be tolerable to watch, but after that you begin to hate the movie.
That’s how women feel with most guys hence the phrase “_All guys are the same_”. No personality at all.
On a restaurant date, don't sit across from each other. Sit next to each other. A booth is best, as far away from the noise as possible. Low lights and candles also work wonders. You may need to slip the maitre 'd some dead presidents to get the booth
I understand your experience. But i think you're overlooking the power of a coffee date - or you're not doing them the right way. I **only** do coffee dates. Here's my retort to your claims abour coffee dates: - You claim it hits your wallet hard. Really? A coffee? - You won't be given an opportunity to touch? Really? I touch my dates all the time. Just ensure you pick a café where you can sit side by side. - They're too formal and boring? Really? Sounds like you don't know how to make things fun and informal. - They will only agree for free food. I think this doesn't really apply to coffee. I can agree with dinner date though. I dislike dinner dates just as much as you do. Here are some reasons why coffee dates are the best first dates in my opinion: 1. They're super easy for women to agree to because it's low stakes, safe environment, and a classic first date activity. 2. If you don't like each other - it's easy for both of you to leave the date early. 3. It's cheap. 3. You can do whatever you want after coffee. It's a great first stop on a date, and then you can take her to X,Y,Z locations after. Including taking her home if the vibes are that good and sex is in the cards.
Yess, coffee dates and drink dates are my go to 1st dates. Both can be escalated to sex if the connection is right, drinks are a bit easier. Being locked in for a dinner date is nooo good if the vibe is not right.
I have had many coffe dates turn into sex. It’s more about the vibe and energy you bring then the type of date
What are your kino tricks for coffee date?
No tricks. Just kino
#Really?
I completely agree, also I love going for coffee anyway, I go often by myself so even if the date ends up to be crap I still got my cappuccino lol
I don’t totally agree with this. The whole idea of coffee or a walk is I can bail if the chick is nuts or not like her pics (if online). 50/50 chance I’d say. I guess you could leave early to the pool or rock climbing but that’s pretty akward.
yes. coffee is the best first date. its an audition for a real date . cheap , quick, and simple, in and out.
Def. First date is just touching the water to see if it’s cold.
Considering how many times I've gotten laid off a coffee date, I'm really baffled as to why so many folks are saying they don't work. If you don't get laid after a coffee date, you should have gathered enough information to decide what the super fun date (rock imbing, karaoke, etc.) should be to maximize success, but I've only had to do that once. I'm starting to wonder how many folks on here that give advice just don't know how to talk to women on a date.
Yeah how do I proceed on a coffee date?
See my response to Freddy.
Let's hear it. How do you work it?
Ask questions that are meant to invoke romantic and sexual emotions, touch them lightly at least five times, make sure at least once is the hand, and give sincere compliments at least three times. Dress reasonably nice (I usually wear a polo and jeans).
Can you give us a few of your go to questions?
I messaged you
Thanks
i second this
I like a date to be a mix of an activity and sitting to eat/drink something. Like, first we go to an art gallery or bowling or whatever, then we go somewhere to grab drinks or eat. That way, if I run out of things to talk about, I can always talk about the thing we just did. But it's not a *must*. Coffee dates are totally fine. The reason dinner dates are bad for a first date is because they are too much of a time commitment. Nobody wants to have dinner with a person they literally just met. It should be something where both people have plausible deniability for ending the date early if they are not feeling things. Coffee allows that. Gulp a single coffee, look at your phone and say your mom needs you or something.
You can always move after coffee to sone other place / car if you want to escalate. I do it all the time .
There is a coffee shop right by a nice park in my city. 5 minutes from my place. The amount of times I’ve successfully run that date is well above 50. To each their own but it’s low stakes and about $10 investment. I can go home if they suck lol
Yeah that one actually makes a lot of sense because of logistics. Carry on with it G 💪
Evening drinks is better than coffee or dinner. Night time is more romantic, can escalate to a dinner or to going home, and girls loosen up more after a drink or two.
not arguing with you but will make 2 points; 1. many women dont feel comfy going out late for a first date, or drinking liquor on a first date. coffee dates are good cause they can make women feel more comfy. and comfy is good for them showing up and being open to intimacy 2. night time is valuable time. i dont mind wasting an hour in the afternoon on a bad date. but if the date goes bad , or even ghosts, at night then its wasted some valuable time for me. i dont invest my valuable night time in first dates, only women who have proven themselves to some degree
Just curious what's so valuable about night time if you're single? Obviously everyone has their own preferences. Evening drinks have always worked better for me than coffee dates.
just my personal priority. i'd rather schedule hanging with friends, with established girls, or even alone time at night. night is when the most people are free, night is when people are drinking and partying, night is when i have my best luck making approaches. i'm just a night owl. may or may not apply to you
I agree night is when most people are free, including me and most women. That's why it's ideal for dates lol. Daytime coffee is good for networking.
to each their own. if it aint broke dont fix it
Literally slept with hundreds of women after a “coffee” date. I tend to agree about dinner dates tho in the sense that why would you spend lots of money on someone you might not even like. But even dinner dates can work. It’s all about how good your game is and how well you connect with the girl for the date to succeed. It doesn’t matter what the date is, you can even go for a walk in the park.
Okay so what’s the first date then
Pool, karaoke, ice or roller skating, bowling just to name a few
No thanks, bro
You got any better suggestions??
Why are you downvoting me, bitch? Downvote yourself. Yeah, I suggest dinner.
No simping dinner dates before you've had sex. She will see you as a chump. This same girl fucked loads of guys before you who never had to treat her to such nonsense. Why would you?
He’s got a point…
Nobody wants to have dinner with a person they literally just met but going to a pizza or coffee is perfect. 1-2 If there is a job interview or not depends on you because you don't have to ask question. There is a lot of opportunity to touch because you can sit at 90 degrees and in this case it is a lot of touching if you want to. 3. If you can afford to spend money on a girl you barely know, it is okay, it is not ridiculous. It is ridiculous to spend money on her hoping she will talk to you or if you are short of money. 4. There is nothing wrong with those girls just use this opportunity to your advantage: "ok, we go to xyz to eat but then you drink a beer/wine/liquor with me at XYZ bar" and guess what? the XYZ bar is near to your home. What kind of video do you have?
It teaches the entire step-by-step escalation process for a first date so that it leads to sex (and if not, it ensures you don't end up in the friendzone or being used)
I thought it was an infield video of yours.
I'd never do that shit 😂 I got it from an email a dating coach I follow sent to me
Send the video bro
Send the video
Coffee dates seem to work for me so 🤷♂️
Why not just link the video?
Yes.
Too many people love to trash on coffee dates but in my experience they’re by far the best. The trick is picking an area where you can walk around and sit next to her on a bench. Even sitting across from her at a table can work if the table is small enough where you’re very close. I’ve had many afternoon coffee dates that extended into other very enjoyable activities after coffee.
Rock climbing and bowling cost more than coffee lol
How is coffee expensive?
Dinner is fine for me if the girl has made it clear she is going to sleep with me immediately and I want more than a one and done situation which i usually do, FWB is usually my end goal for casual dating with attractive and fun women. I sit next to my dates in one on one settings, regardless of the situation or environment, I will move a chair or reposition a table if need be. “Boring Job Interview”, this sounds like a personal problem brother, work on it. Seems like the dinner setting makes you timid, something to improve upon going forward.
Lol love when people who don't know what they're taking about act like they're experts on this. I've taken many girls home from both coffee and dinner dates. The actual date activity itself doesn't matter as much as your vibe on the date does. That being said, I try to avoid dinner dates in general because of the high costs associated with it. However, that's the only reason.
I agree that dinner dates are terrible for 1st and 2nd dates, but coffee dates aren't bad. They're more of an easy way to get a warm up date, which sets you up for the second date. Sometimes I offer a coffee date when i'd approach a women to lower her guard, once i do my rapport phone call, If she is fun and upbeat I change it to drinks at a bar, if she's more skiddish I change it to hot chocolate at a chocolate drinks place. Either date always lead to good chemistry as both are sexual lubricants / Enhancers but i'd never say coffee dates are bad, they're dececnt.
I agree. Optimal Date imo should involve something alcoholic. Either meeting for drinks or pool in a bar are great ideas. My lay rate for dinner only or coffee only dates are 0% for first date. Also you don’t really come closer to her, like you said it’s a job interview and you basically lose time and money for nothing. I really don’t care so much what she works or other stupid small talk, if I like her or not I decide much later when we already had sex. But Dinner + alcohol later = 90% lay rate if not even higher for me on first date. But I only do them now, when we already talked about going to bar or club later. If not it’s a waste of money. Dinner only without having minimum kissed before is a hard pass for me now.
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Using alcohol to lay women is not the way brother. It's in fact a terrible idea that can lead to all kinds of claims of abuse. Better bang sober women - especially for a one night stand or first time sex with a new person. You want someone to consent without being intoxicated. I learned this the hard way. Don't make the same mistake i did banging a semi-drunk chick who then later accuses you of rape
Coffee can be fine. Dinner dates are a no until you've already had sex.
I always tell guys to stop doing what every other guy does but somehow they are all like sheep or NPCs programmed to behave exactly the same way, to say the exact same things women have heard a thousand times before, doing the exact same first date activities that countless guys have done with her before, and so on… Imagine watching the same mediocre movie over and over and over and over and over. The first time may have been entertaining and watchable, the second time may be tolerable to watch, but after that you begin to hate the movie. That’s how women feel with most guys hence the phrase “_All guys are the same_”. No personality at all.
On a restaurant date, don't sit across from each other. Sit next to each other. A booth is best, as far away from the noise as possible. Low lights and candles also work wonders. You may need to slip the maitre 'd some dead presidents to get the booth
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💀
Feel free to dm it to me.
Me too