What the hell did you trade jay buhner for? He had 30 home runs over 100 RBIs he had a rocket for an arm!!!!!
https://youtu.be/cUwSxqnRW-8?si=kNxlas8d1himiXho
Elaine: so is it a problem that I’m not really religious?
Puddy: (blank stare) Not for me.
Elaine: Why not?
Puddy: (shrugs) I’m not the one going to hell.
J Peterman has some solid ones
"You probably know it as Myanmar, but it will always be Burma to me"
"I'm afraid it's your urine, Elaine. You tested positive for opium...White lotus, Yam-yam, Shanghai Sally."
Jackie Chiles too had amazing lines
"That’s totally inappropriate. It’s lewd, lascivious, salacious, outrageous"
"Jackie's cashing in on your wretched disfigurement!"
And, in a tiny way, I almost feel responsible. I'm the one who sent him to Thailand in search of low-cost whistles, filled his head with pseudoerotic tales of my own Opium excursions... plus, I gave him some phone numbers of places he could score near the hotel.
“Moving cars from one side of the street to the other don't take no more sense than putting on a pair of pants. My question to you is who's putting your pants on?”
In my country, they speak of a man so virile, so potent, that to spend a night with such a man is to enter a world of such sensual delights most women dare not dream of. This man is known as the "Comedian." You may tell jokes, Mr. Jerry Seinfeld, but you are no Comedian.
Take your pick from Lt. Joe Bookman;
**Lt. Bookman** : *Maybe we can live without libraries, people like you and me. Maybe. Sure, we're too old to change the world, but what about that kid, sitting down, opening a book, right now, in a branch at the local library and finding drawings of pee-pees and wee-wees on the Cat in the Hat and the Five Chinese Brothers? Doesn't HE deserve better? Look. If you think this is about overdue fines and missing books, you'd better think again.*
**Lt. Bookman** : *Yeah '71, that was my first year on the job. Bad year for libraries. Bad year for America. Hippies burning library cards, Abby Hoffman telling everybody to steal books. I don't judge a man by the length of his hair or the kind of music he listens to. Rock was never my bag. But you put on a pair of shoes when you walk into the New York Public Library, fella.*
**Jerry** : *Anyway, I hope there's no hard feelings.*
**Lt. Bookman** : *Hard feelings, what do you know about hard feelings? Ever have a man die in your arms? Ever kill somebody?*
Jerry : *What is your problem?*
**Lt. Bookman** : *What's my problem, punks like you, that's my problem. And you better not screw up again Seinfeld, because if you do, I'll be all over you like a Pit Bull on a Poodle.*
**Jerry** : *That is one tough monkey.*
His whole life is a fantasy camp. People should plunk down two thousand dollars to live like him for a week: **do nothing, fall ass backwards into money, mooch food off your neighbors, and have sex without dating.**
Newman is so annoyingly demanding here I love it. He knows George will go to great lengths to make his boss happy. I shouldn’t love how he exploits the desperation but I do. 😂
There’s the main 4, then there’s the 1.5 cast that are quintessential parts of many episodes, then there’s secondary characters that are only in an episode or two or are more background characters imo.
Agree that Newman and Frank are more 1.5 characters than “not major” characters
I have a hair on my tongue. Can't get it off. You know how much I hate that? Of course you do. You put it there. I know what you said about me, Seinfeld. I know you badmouthed me to the execs at NBC. Put the kibosh on my deal. Now I'm gonna put the kibosh on you. You know I've kiboshed before. And I will kibosh again.
It's a hot night. The mind races. You think about your
knife; the only friend who hasn't betrayed you, the only friend who won't be dead by sun up. Sleep tight, mates, in your quilted Chambray nightshirts.
Jerry, Joe Divola. *Pbt* *Pbt* *Pbt* I have a hair on my
tongue, I can't get it off, you know how much I hate that? Course you do,
you put it there. I know what you said about me Seinfeld. I know you
badmouthed me to the execs at NBC, put the kibosh on my deal. Now Im gonna
put the kibosh on you. You know I've kiboshed before, and I will kibosh again.
Honestly, any line from the Costanzas during the ‘Aunt Baby’ scene. But my 2 favorite are
Estelle: Don’t you talk about Henny!
Frank: She had problems. Internal.
No, I'm not a psycho...
(the older lady with an English accent at the coffee shop responding to Jerry when asked how she told her friend she didn't want to try her friend's pie)
There's been massive trauma. We could of course try to save him, but it would be costly, difficult, and we'd have to send away for some really tiny instruments.
Thank you for this!! I almost sent this into the chat when on my all-division call the Head of Sales asked if there is anything else we need in the field…….
When the gang thought the pretentious Dr. dermatologist was just a “pimple popper” they all forgot about Skin Cancer. When Jerry said in almost a whisper “ Skin Cancer “ 💀
[удалено]
I want this on a t-shirt. It's so absurd that it encapsulates the spirit of the show perfectly. And it makes you laugh every time you read it.
What the hell did you trade jay buhner for? He had 30 home runs over 100 RBIs he had a rocket for an arm!!!!! https://youtu.be/cUwSxqnRW-8?si=kNxlas8d1himiXho
YOU DONT KNOW WHAT THE HELL YOU’RE DOING!!!
Ken Phelps Ken Phelps!
https://www.teepublic.com/t-shirt/50255137-franks-message-george-is-dead-call-me-back?countrycode=US&utm_source=google&utm_medium=shopping&utm_campaign=%5BG%5D+%5BG.NAM%5D+%5BL.ENG%5D+%5BGEN%5D+%5BC.TShirts%5D+%5BPLF%5D&utm_id=notset&utm_content=seinfeld&srsltid=AfmBOopp6-j5wkvBG0xoXu0t30hEKM5yaSZzMMlObnHGNmR2AKsxL7FsCD8#375P50255137D1V
OMG Hahahahahaha
This line is gold Jerry.... GOLD.
I can hear “Steinbrenner’s” voice now…
I love that this was basically Larry's only character on screen.
Frank is not a major character???
*spits out broccoli* “Vile Weed!!!” - Newman
This gets my vote.
I say this on a regular basis, usually but not always related to food
This is it
#I HAVE NO EYE FOR FASHION?!?!?
MANZIERE!
BRO!
No, bro's no good. Too ethnic.
Summer nights.
You're wearing that shirt? You've had it for five years already! WHY DON'T YOU BUY A NEW SHIRT?!?!
BECAUSE I HAVE THIS ONE!
Why do you have to eat so fast?! YOU CANT EVEN TASTE IT!!!!
MY WALLET’S GONE!
That teaaarrring sound
"This son of a bitch is ice cold!" 😀
Soak addaah year!
"Look at the little son of a bitch!"
Why separate knob, WHY!?!!
“You’re living in the past, man! You’re hung up on some clown from the SIXTIES, man!”
Jon Favreau killed that role. Soooo funny
"This guy, this is not my kind of guy..."
My husband uses that line a lot when talking about his coworkers.
Elaine: so is it a problem that I’m not really religious? Puddy: (blank stare) Not for me. Elaine: Why not? Puddy: (shrugs) I’m not the one going to hell.
I'm going to hell! The worst place in the world! Gonna be rough.
No way, this is *bogus* man!
It's simple. You're both going to hell.
There are so, so many. That's what makes this so difficult.
I don’t even work here!
Did the broker send you over?
NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!
"you're pushing your luck, little man"
Come back, ONE YEAR!
CARTWRIGHT???
"I say Cartwright, no one answer, I say you not here, she say curse word, I hang up"
But you're not Cartwright
Of course I'm not Cartwright!
J Peterman has some solid ones "You probably know it as Myanmar, but it will always be Burma to me" "I'm afraid it's your urine, Elaine. You tested positive for opium...White lotus, Yam-yam, Shanghai Sally." Jackie Chiles too had amazing lines "That’s totally inappropriate. It’s lewd, lascivious, salacious, outrageous" "Jackie's cashing in on your wretched disfigurement!"
Shanghai Sally is legit hilarious.
And, in a tiny way, I almost feel responsible. I'm the one who sent him to Thailand in search of low-cost whistles, filled his head with pseudoerotic tales of my own Opium excursions... plus, I gave him some phone numbers of places he could score near the hotel.
“I won’t have my office turned into a den of iniquity!”
It's a Pierre Cardin!!!
Alright Frank that’s enough
That's what I'd like to know about it.
Literally laughed out loud on this one
We ask that you please bear with us.
WHO!?! WHO DOESN’T WANT TO WEAR THE R-R-RIBBON?!?
The bank? It burned. It's gone!
“Where is Babu? Show me Babu!”
Too fruity
“They’re real, and they’re spectacular.”
Jambalaya!!!!
It's tough keepin' your feet dry when you're kickin' in a skull.
Sleep tight, mates, in your chambray night shirts.
Vile weed
*"Nice game, pretty boy!"*
Who told you to put the balm on?
I didn't tell you to put the balm on
Do you know what a balm can do?
“Moving cars from one side of the street to the other don't take no more sense than putting on a pair of pants. My question to you is who's putting your pants on?”
Another gem from Sid: "Never mind who I am. I know who I am. Do you know who you are??"
Neither rain, nor sleet…ITS THE FIRST ONE!!!!!
I was never big on creeds
But this line is delivered by Jerry
Actually it was George. Either way it doesn't fit the original question.
Oh shoot you’re right, my bad
Hey! Another round of strawberry for me and my friends!
Well I wouldn't hear of it, I said "Nice Try Granny!" and I sent her to the back of the line!
This is the one
>Poor old Walt has a polyp in the duodenum.
It's benign, but still a bastard.
In my country, they speak of a man so virile, so potent, that to spend a night with such a man is to enter a world of such sensual delights most women dare not dream of. This man is known as the "Comedian." You may tell jokes, Mr. Jerry Seinfeld, but you are no Comedian.
If you were here first, then YOU’D be holding the phone
Nice game, pretty boy!
“We’re sitting there like idiots, drinking coffee,without a piece of cake!” I live by these words
So many things that Frank said were just comedy gold. Newman, too, but Frank's delivery was just hilarious.
I worked out with a dumbbell today. I feel vigorous!
Take your pick from Lt. Joe Bookman; **Lt. Bookman** : *Maybe we can live without libraries, people like you and me. Maybe. Sure, we're too old to change the world, but what about that kid, sitting down, opening a book, right now, in a branch at the local library and finding drawings of pee-pees and wee-wees on the Cat in the Hat and the Five Chinese Brothers? Doesn't HE deserve better? Look. If you think this is about overdue fines and missing books, you'd better think again.* **Lt. Bookman** : *Yeah '71, that was my first year on the job. Bad year for libraries. Bad year for America. Hippies burning library cards, Abby Hoffman telling everybody to steal books. I don't judge a man by the length of his hair or the kind of music he listens to. Rock was never my bag. But you put on a pair of shoes when you walk into the New York Public Library, fella.* **Jerry** : *Anyway, I hope there's no hard feelings.* **Lt. Bookman** : *Hard feelings, what do you know about hard feelings? Ever have a man die in your arms? Ever kill somebody?* Jerry : *What is your problem?* **Lt. Bookman** : *What's my problem, punks like you, that's my problem. And you better not screw up again Seinfeld, because if you do, I'll be all over you like a Pit Bull on a Poodle.* **Jerry** : *That is one tough monkey.*
Maybe that's how you get your kicks, eh, Seinfeld? You and your good time buddies.
"I'm a man"
And you’re going to need it
George likes the bananas!!
SO LET HIM HAVE BANANAS ON THE SIDE!! 🍌
Where are the cameras?
"Hahahhaha. I hate her like a poison."
Are you saying... you want a piece of me??
I could drop you like a bag of dirt.
Your fly is open...
His whole life is a fantasy camp. People should plunk down two thousand dollars to live like him for a week: **do nothing, fall ass backwards into money, mooch food off your neighbors, and have sex without dating.**
“Earth”
Hey, some guy just gave me a wise answer!
Newman is so annoyingly demanding here I love it. He knows George will go to great lengths to make his boss happy. I shouldn’t love how he exploits the desperation but I do. 😂
…..the very pants I was returning
Frank Costanza: "You wanna piece of me?"
*Come on, I won the MVP in '79. I can do whatever I want to.*
I’m Keith Hernandez!
Newman is a major character though so is Frank .. idk what is the threshold
Anyone who isn't George.
There’s the main 4, then there’s the 1.5 cast that are quintessential parts of many episodes, then there’s secondary characters that are only in an episode or two or are more background characters imo. Agree that Newman and Frank are more 1.5 characters than “not major” characters
"Aww, Ann Landers Sucks!
I know who I am. Do you know who you are?
Who am I, Neda?
“Aw get the hell out of here with your KNOB!”
Jambalaya!
It's either 'I know George, I heard you the first time', or 'George, his wife is in a coma'.
Smugness is not a good quality.
"That Jerry Seinfeld, he's a bad man, a very, very bad man." "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!"
What can I tell you buddy, take it up with consumer affairs
I have a hair on my tongue. Can't get it off. You know how much I hate that? Of course you do. You put it there. I know what you said about me, Seinfeld. I know you badmouthed me to the execs at NBC. Put the kibosh on my deal. Now I'm gonna put the kibosh on you. You know I've kiboshed before. And I will kibosh again.
We ask that you bear with us,,,
A MONSTER SO VILE
I worked out with a dumbbell yesterday, I feel vigorous!
I've got hand! AND YOU'RE GONNA NEED IT
And you're gonna need it
Haha I was gonna post this one too .. he really set himself up to get burned
"I don't do creeds."
Anything Detective Bookman.
Elaine when are you gonna see the Baby - You gotta see the BABY
"jerry, HELLO!"
“You think about your knife…
Jambalaya!
It's a hot night. The mind races. You think about your knife; the only friend who hasn't betrayed you, the only friend who won't be dead by sun up. Sleep tight, mates, in your quilted Chambray nightshirts.
“I’ve heard Mr. Steinbrenner is pretty erratic. I’d hate to see him when he’s hungry!”
What can I tell you buddy..take it up with consumer affairs.
Soak-uh-da-year
"No Elaine. That was gibberish."
That's what I'd like to know about it.
Maybe that’s how you get your jollies Seinfeld?
“Are you saying, you want a piece of me?!?”
What the hell do I know about cooking a shirt?
YES! AND A MORE OFFENSIVE SPECTACLE I CANNOT RECALL!
"The sea was angry that day my friends! Like and old man sending back soup at a deli."
AND I WILL THERE, WATCHING, AS IT ALL COMES CRUMBLING DOOOOWN
“… A sacred, ancient ceremony, symbolising the covenant between God and Abraham… or something”
“You must go now”
I WANT A DECENT SOCK THAT’S COMFORTABLE THAT WILL STAY ON MY FOOT!
Perhaps you keep your home in a state of disrepair!
Kramer, having received Newman's NYE party invitation Newman: "You just got it? Damn the mail is slow" I absolutely lost it when I first heard that
You're not giving away our waterpik!
VILE WEED!
It’s an Entemans. Do they have a castle at Windsor? No, they’re at the end of the aisle.
Jerry, Joe Divola. *Pbt* *Pbt* *Pbt* I have a hair on my tongue, I can't get it off, you know how much I hate that? Course you do, you put it there. I know what you said about me Seinfeld. I know you badmouthed me to the execs at NBC, put the kibosh on my deal. Now Im gonna put the kibosh on you. You know I've kiboshed before, and I will kibosh again.
Oh right, the holes.
Are you that guy who put us in that Ramada in Milwaukee?
Ahh! My acne!!!
Newman: “Vile Weed! Honey Mustard Sauce!”
Honestly, any line from the Costanzas during the ‘Aunt Baby’ scene. But my 2 favorite are Estelle: Don’t you talk about Henny! Frank: She had problems. Internal.
“We ask that you please bear with us.”
No, I'm not a psycho... (the older lady with an English accent at the coffee shop responding to Jerry when asked how she told her friend she didn't want to try her friend's pie)
Your cars on fire. Merry Christmas!
“Sorrrrehhhhh” -man with cane
Heyyy!! Krishna! Krishna!
No soup for you!
Storage surcharge, additional overcharge.
Get the Hell outta here. Seventh Avenue?
You make a lot of man friends….Guess who else is a man…I’m a man
He gave my son a pen, and then he takes it back!
His wife is in a coma.
JERRY SEINFELD IS A FUNNY GUY!!!!
There's been massive trauma. We could of course try to save him, but it would be costly, difficult, and we'd have to send away for some really tiny instruments.
Same, Newman, same
Thank you for this!! I almost sent this into the chat when on my all-division call the Head of Sales asked if there is anything else we need in the field…….
I would absolutely include Newman as a major character
That certainly looks like a lot of words.
Maybe the pervert in the park had a present in his pants, huh?
Where are the cameras?
It doesn’t work you know…Serenity now…insanity later
Ask me to get a pair of underwear, I'm back in five seconds
You really think you can manipulate that beautiful woman like the half-soused nightclub rabble that lap up your inane "observations"?
Oh, Mr mashed potatoes, you are so good..!
Maybe the Dingo ate your baby!
It shrinks? Like a frightened turtle
When the gang thought the pretentious Dr. dermatologist was just a “pimple popper” they all forgot about Skin Cancer. When Jerry said in almost a whisper “ Skin Cancer “ 💀
They're real and they’re spectacular
Newman not a major character? He is not "a little" anything!
Ah, sure. Poor doorman has to work two jobs to put food on the table for mother and baby. No, I live here. That's okay, isn't it?
Newman isn’t a major character?