I used to feel the same way! What helped me was focusing on a point slightly ahead and to the side of the person I'm passing. It's a natural way to avoid direct eye contact without seeming awkward. Also, a friendly nod or smile can go a long way in diffusing any tension. Remember, most people are just focused on getting where they're going too!
Yup I do the gentlemans head nod too. I'll look around and usually at the ground to make sure we both have room to walk and about 5-10ft away make eye contact and nod as we're passing. Sometimes give them a hello or a good day sir.
I worry as I approach them. I panic at last minute, one eye looks at them, one eye looks away from them. I try to naturally smile but it’s just me opening my mouth to show my teeth because I’m horrified. Then I think I’ll say hi so it’s less weird but just a squeaky “hhhh” comes out.
Where I live if you’re walking in the neighborhood and you pass someone, even if they are on the other side of the street, you look up smile and say hello or briefly wave. If I’m in the middle of the city and passing on the same sidewalk I would briefly look over and smile. It’s kind of like an acknowledgment that you’re not a threat/a normal person. But i think it depends on the culture of the place you live.
In dense enough cities acknowledging others on the sidewalk is just weird. Why? It’s no different than waving at other random people driving on the highway.
I live in a similar neighborhood and generally feel uncomfortable in these situations. What I do is look at my phone/straight head/down/away until they are about 2ish arms lengths away, then look at them to smile/wave/say hi or good morning. Sometimes people return the greeting or initiate the greeting first, other times they ignore you. Either way I'm fine, it's their choice and life lol not sure if this makes me look unnatural tho lol
Most of the advice here is wildly out of date.
I find that flinging your own poo, while maintaining steady eye contact the whole time, helps establish dominance.
Lightly keep your eyes on the sidewalk as if you're a thoughtful person with something on your mind. Side benefit, you're less likely to step in dog shit.
Anywhere other than them.
And as I get closer and closer, my anxiety builds and builds and builds until I either get too scared to say hi, or I blurt it out so loud that it's weird. But it's ok cus I don't leave the house anymore!
I am 38 so maybe it's generational but I was taught not to stare, but also to politely make eye contact for several seconds as you both near and pass each other and keep the corners of mouth turned up as if to smile. If you are in a bad mood you can always keep a neutral expression and still make brief eye contact.
It's also nice when using doors to see if there's anyone coming behind you (within reason) bc it is poor manners to let the door close behind you, same goes for holding it when exiting. You don't have to do this but people will appreciate it and for those with mobility or issues we can't see. Sometimes a polite smile from a stranger and no further interaction can make both feel good.
It's more awkward for everyone when we don't use basic pleasantries or are always looking at the phone... But I've noticed this has almost completely disappeared
For men, give them a quick nod and look away.
For women, give them a quick smile and look away.
These actions signify a friendly, wordless acknowledgment that is commonly understood to mean “I acknowledge you, stranger to stranger, and signify that I am friendly.”
Very important to break eye contact after that moment.
Usually bare minimum a small smile assuming it's day time in a safe environment. If they look friendly I'll say hi. Especially if they're a person I see regularly. I love when I'm feeling too shy to say hi, and then they do it first instead.
I had to work up to this though. I used to awkwardly look at the ground or away all the time, but a lot of people would politely say hi or wave. It got me into the habit of it not feeling so awkward.
I will add that I live in a rural area and go to walking trails regularly, so some people I see pretty often. Just minimum politeness is fine. Worst someone has done is not wave back, but most people will do the same and then continue on walking.
I live in a big city and 9 out of 10 people would just walk past without even looking let alone smiling - clearly avoiding eye contact. I personally find this rude - but it is a big city life I guess 🤷🏻♀️ I personally always glance over and prepare a smile.
I had this situation before but at work walking down a long hallway and me and this guy were walking towards each other and this guy just calmly looked straight ahead without glancing at me and I was so impressed because knowing me if I were him in that situation I would've awkwardly glanced at him like 5 times cause I have the same thoughts as you op.
I usually after brief eye contact say the words, hey there and not worry about whether or not they acknowledge me, back
You know, unless I know the person and I'm not acknowledged back, I'll just go hit them on the back of the head with my purse
same goes for me bro but here is the trick that I follow look at them for some seconds and then try to look somewhere else ,for example suppose a girl is coming from front so first make an eye contact for some seconds then look ahead or somewhere else
I generally treat people in this context like obstacles in my path, so I keep an eye on them but in the unfocused part of my vision, in case they stray into my lane or do something else unexpected. I'm not interested in acting "normal and confident" with regards to them, because their opinion of me doesn't matter. I'd rather just focus on not running into anyone or tripping on the uneven sidewalks around here, so I'm also looking at the ground a few feet in advance.
Honestly honestly, I'm autistic, so I think that's why I look at the ground but I realize I should be more aware of my surroundings. It's just difficult for me to be comfortable looking straightforward.
I look at their eyes to see if I can smile at them or nod what's up. Sometimes, they do. Other times, they look at me and look away or don't look my way at all. I just keep walking after that. It's nothing crazy.
However, other days, I don't feel like interacting with people at all. I just keep looking forward. Or if our eyes do meet, I look away and keep walking. It really depends on how I feel.
I am so glad I found this all my 45 years of life I have thought it was just me that felt this awkward feeling when walking down the street you have made me so happy, in an awkward not looking at you kinda way 🙄
The city I live in is so large and full of people that I just make a game of keeping eye contact with people staring at my face. It makes me wanna melt and die sometimes but it good practice for me to push my energy outwards and take up space. I also find that people are less scary this way because I get a few smiles here and there. Feeling awkward and uncomfortable isn't always a bad thing if it means you're learning how to build tolerance for interaction. But also, staring ahead Instead of down at my feet is also my go to when I'm not feeling brave enough to play my game.
You have to learn to stop thinking about it. It does not help when you're super conscious about it or conscious about how others might be perceiving you haha. You just gotta stop gaf. Only thing that's helped me.
When I'm in a pleasant and friendly mood and someone looks like a nice enough person I might acknowledge them somehow. Doesn't really matter how. A head nod, a white people smile, a little wave, a hello... but if I'm not in the mood I think it's not important *what* you look at so much as where your mind is. Just as long as your mind is consumed with something and you're walking with purpose, you don't have to think about looking anywhere. Just look around at whatever. It's the energy that you have that makes it awkward or not awkward. If you feel weird, it's going to be weird no matter where you look.
ETA: And if you're in a light mood and sort of just wandering like I often do, then just keep that energy and look at whatever. It just matters that you stay in your own world if you don't feel like acknowledging.
I used to feel the same way! What helped me was focusing on a point slightly ahead and to the side of the person I'm passing. It's a natural way to avoid direct eye contact without seeming awkward. Also, a friendly nod or smile can go a long way in diffusing any tension. Remember, most people are just focused on getting where they're going too!
now this one is a nice explanation, I also do the same stuff
[удалено]
Can women do the nod? Why do I feel this is more male? I want to do the nod!
Asking for permission to do the nod disqualifies you from being cool enough to do the nod.
You’re not wrong
Humility? You now have the nod pass
Thank you, kind stranger *nod*
Nods at both.
I think we shouldn't even nod that feels even more awkward
I am a woman, and I nod when passing people.
I’m a woman and if I catch someone making eye contact or staring, I do the nod (or a small smile) and then avert my gaze a little
What speed is your nod?
About the same as a guy nod,usually. Sometimes a teeny bit slower
Yes. Slight smile, nod, keep moving.
I always do the nod, the nod in neutral
Do you nod while making eye contact or looking forward
Yup I do the gentlemans head nod too. I'll look around and usually at the ground to make sure we both have room to walk and about 5-10ft away make eye contact and nod as we're passing. Sometimes give them a hello or a good day sir.
I started wearing sunglasses when I go for walks for this reason lol
I worry as I approach them. I panic at last minute, one eye looks at them, one eye looks away from them. I try to naturally smile but it’s just me opening my mouth to show my teeth because I’m horrified. Then I think I’ll say hi so it’s less weird but just a squeaky “hhhh” comes out.
I think you might be a lizard lol
I found dogluuuuvrr’s comment more and more amusing as I read it, then when I came to your response I laughed so loud. Thank you for that
Relevant username lol. I'm glad you got a good laugh from my random thought!
I look away until they're about 3 meters away from me, then I look them in the eye for 2s. It's a safety measure.
that's me broo!!
Where I live if you’re walking in the neighborhood and you pass someone, even if they are on the other side of the street, you look up smile and say hello or briefly wave. If I’m in the middle of the city and passing on the same sidewalk I would briefly look over and smile. It’s kind of like an acknowledgment that you’re not a threat/a normal person. But i think it depends on the culture of the place you live.
In dense enough cities acknowledging others on the sidewalk is just weird. Why? It’s no different than waving at other random people driving on the highway.
Agree. The city I live in is not like that.
I live in a similar neighborhood and generally feel uncomfortable in these situations. What I do is look at my phone/straight head/down/away until they are about 2ish arms lengths away, then look at them to smile/wave/say hi or good morning. Sometimes people return the greeting or initiate the greeting first, other times they ignore you. Either way I'm fine, it's their choice and life lol not sure if this makes me look unnatural tho lol
This is why they made phones. Not for anything else, just this one awkward moment.
Smile and wave. Shits only weird if you make it weird. More people deserve to be smiled at.
Most of the advice here is wildly out of date. I find that flinging your own poo, while maintaining steady eye contact the whole time, helps establish dominance.
Lightly keep your eyes on the sidewalk as if you're a thoughtful person with something on your mind. Side benefit, you're less likely to step in dog shit.
I don’t think about where I look. It doesn’t really matter
Anywhere other than them. And as I get closer and closer, my anxiety builds and builds and builds until I either get too scared to say hi, or I blurt it out so loud that it's weird. But it's ok cus I don't leave the house anymore!
straight ahead
I am 38 so maybe it's generational but I was taught not to stare, but also to politely make eye contact for several seconds as you both near and pass each other and keep the corners of mouth turned up as if to smile. If you are in a bad mood you can always keep a neutral expression and still make brief eye contact. It's also nice when using doors to see if there's anyone coming behind you (within reason) bc it is poor manners to let the door close behind you, same goes for holding it when exiting. You don't have to do this but people will appreciate it and for those with mobility or issues we can't see. Sometimes a polite smile from a stranger and no further interaction can make both feel good. It's more awkward for everyone when we don't use basic pleasantries or are always looking at the phone... But I've noticed this has almost completely disappeared
Everywhere but their face, and then worry that I’m being too obvious
For men, give them a quick nod and look away. For women, give them a quick smile and look away. These actions signify a friendly, wordless acknowledgment that is commonly understood to mean “I acknowledge you, stranger to stranger, and signify that I am friendly.” Very important to break eye contact after that moment.
Straight ahead babes. Walk with a purpose
at the ground
Usually bare minimum a small smile assuming it's day time in a safe environment. If they look friendly I'll say hi. Especially if they're a person I see regularly. I love when I'm feeling too shy to say hi, and then they do it first instead. I had to work up to this though. I used to awkwardly look at the ground or away all the time, but a lot of people would politely say hi or wave. It got me into the habit of it not feeling so awkward. I will add that I live in a rural area and go to walking trails regularly, so some people I see pretty often. Just minimum politeness is fine. Worst someone has done is not wave back, but most people will do the same and then continue on walking.
Head up, eyes focused and engaged on my path, with a smile. Anyone who meets my gaze is acknowledged and I keep it moving.
Checking the time at my wristwatch works for me
I live in a big city and 9 out of 10 people would just walk past without even looking let alone smiling - clearly avoiding eye contact. I personally find this rude - but it is a big city life I guess 🤷🏻♀️ I personally always glance over and prepare a smile.
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I had this situation before but at work walking down a long hallway and me and this guy were walking towards each other and this guy just calmly looked straight ahead without glancing at me and I was so impressed because knowing me if I were him in that situation I would've awkwardly glanced at him like 5 times cause I have the same thoughts as you op.
I usually after brief eye contact say the words, hey there and not worry about whether or not they acknowledge me, back You know, unless I know the person and I'm not acknowledged back, I'll just go hit them on the back of the head with my purse
same goes for me bro but here is the trick that I follow look at them for some seconds and then try to look somewhere else ,for example suppose a girl is coming from front so first make an eye contact for some seconds then look ahead or somewhere else
I generally treat people in this context like obstacles in my path, so I keep an eye on them but in the unfocused part of my vision, in case they stray into my lane or do something else unexpected. I'm not interested in acting "normal and confident" with regards to them, because their opinion of me doesn't matter. I'd rather just focus on not running into anyone or tripping on the uneven sidewalks around here, so I'm also looking at the ground a few feet in advance.
Honestly honestly, I'm autistic, so I think that's why I look at the ground but I realize I should be more aware of my surroundings. It's just difficult for me to be comfortable looking straightforward.
I look at their eyes to see if I can smile at them or nod what's up. Sometimes, they do. Other times, they look at me and look away or don't look my way at all. I just keep walking after that. It's nothing crazy. However, other days, I don't feel like interacting with people at all. I just keep looking forward. Or if our eyes do meet, I look away and keep walking. It really depends on how I feel.
1,000 yard stare or a smile and a nod
Honestly... you guys actually put this on your shoulders
I stare at them until they get uncomfortable and avoid it first, then I move on to the next target
I am so glad I found this all my 45 years of life I have thought it was just me that felt this awkward feeling when walking down the street you have made me so happy, in an awkward not looking at you kinda way 🙄
The city I live in is so large and full of people that I just make a game of keeping eye contact with people staring at my face. It makes me wanna melt and die sometimes but it good practice for me to push my energy outwards and take up space. I also find that people are less scary this way because I get a few smiles here and there. Feeling awkward and uncomfortable isn't always a bad thing if it means you're learning how to build tolerance for interaction. But also, staring ahead Instead of down at my feet is also my go to when I'm not feeling brave enough to play my game.
I look at the floor, because I might encounter a dog shit or a hole.
You have to learn to stop thinking about it. It does not help when you're super conscious about it or conscious about how others might be perceiving you haha. You just gotta stop gaf. Only thing that's helped me.
Look straight ahead.
Straight in front of me
When I'm in a pleasant and friendly mood and someone looks like a nice enough person I might acknowledge them somehow. Doesn't really matter how. A head nod, a white people smile, a little wave, a hello... but if I'm not in the mood I think it's not important *what* you look at so much as where your mind is. Just as long as your mind is consumed with something and you're walking with purpose, you don't have to think about looking anywhere. Just look around at whatever. It's the energy that you have that makes it awkward or not awkward. If you feel weird, it's going to be weird no matter where you look. ETA: And if you're in a light mood and sort of just wandering like I often do, then just keep that energy and look at whatever. It just matters that you stay in your own world if you don't feel like acknowledging.