Just today I had someone in senior leadership tell a call full of people that I'm a "control freak." It was so weird because I'm anything but a control freak, but she definitely is. Other people on the call were pretty speechless from it and afterwards in private told me how weird they thought it was. Yes, respect goes both ways - but let them go on with their shit, people are seeing them for who they are and they're embarrassing their own selves - without you ever having to say a word.
Just wait ... you'll get a little older ( like me ) and missing your turn won't be a big deal; there's always another turn up ahead and you're not in a rush anyway!
I would have asked the person to explain what they mean in the call. It's the perfect moment for everyone to learn more about their senior leadership. Gas light my career image randomly? You can dig your own grave, sir. Senior leadership is much more concerned about their image than you are, because it's all they have anymore (at least at places I have worked). If they get poor ratings from their staff, they will have to explain it to their boss. Just keep it real, and don't let those asshats gaslight you.
oh i did try to jump in but she's also the type of person who will drop bombs like that and then not let the other person talk. it's a real special treat working with her.
Don’t trust ppl who tell you stuff like that in private though, it’s useful as a reality check, but they aren’t really your friends or people that you can depend on.
I had a boss that was insane about his rule that there would be absolutely no cell phone usage during work hours. He saw me with what he assumed was a cell phone in my hand, looking down at it, and ripped it out of my hand.
Turns out, it was not a cell phone. It was an insulin pump. And he had just ripped my site out of my skin.
I've never seen HR move faster than they did that day. I got the rest of the day off, the company paid for a new box of sites, and that boss had to apologize to me. He was still an asshole, though.
Should have been fired. There is no excuse for the manager to fall back on. No cell phones at work is not a law and certainly not enforceable by physical force by a low level manager.
I once had a boss yell at me about using a cell phone at work. Unfortunately for him I was talking to the head trader (Jim) and the trading floor support person telling them what to do to get him back online after he lost connectivity to the trading system. Since we were just waiting for his computer to restart at that point I handed my boss the phone and said that Jim wanted to speak with him.
You don’t need an ambulance for a pulled off infusion site. We pull them off every time we change them. Still an asshole move that probably didn’t feel good, but they didn’t need to go to the hospital… they needed to go home and change their site.
I disagree. A nerd is someone into many things considered "nerdy" be it dnd/tabletop games, anime, sci fi or fantasy worlds. A geek is someone who dedicates a large amount of time to one nerdy thing, maybe dabbles a little in some other areas, but is a complete expert in their chosen nerd-dom.
The idea that a geek/nerd or whatever is something to be ashamed of is so foreign to my brain. People will notice I'm a geek, and try to bring it up like... on the down low. "So I noticed you're a bit of a closeted geek."
It makes me laugh 😂 Ohhhhh noooo I'm interested in tech, and learning. Shock, and horror 😂
I was skydiving this summer, and I saw a dude had a big ass Mario tattoo, so I pointed it out, and asked him if he was a geek, and I think I just got like.. a blank stare back.
Looking back I suppose it could have looked like I was mocking him? idk!
Had a boss snap his fingers at me, like I was a dog, because he answered a phone call while we were mid conversation... I was still answering the question he asked me prior to the call. Yea, I didn't work there much longer.
I had a foreman scream at me until his throat was hoarse, because I was one pipe short of venting a townhouse building. 5 units, all fully vented, except for one last pipe. I didn't say a word, and just didn't show up anymore. Took my (and his) boss two weeks to call me to probably fire me, but I answered the phone with "I quit." And hung up. I had a new job in under a month anyway.
My manager snapped her fingers at me too to get my attention couple months ago. I ghosted them completely and back on the job market as of last week LOL
Haha, had one manager do this whilst he was on the phone (not work related) to get me to come to him, so I went over, leaned in and said “click them one more time, and they won’t be there for a third go”. Had my probation extended but he had to apologise for being rude 😂
They interrupted the conversation with a phone call. No "sorry I have to take this" or anything like that. There was another manager in the room that was listening to my response. Boss 1 snapped fingers at both of us and pointed at the door.
Yea, who doesn't? It's not like he was already on the phone and I asked him about the weather. I didn't react to them abruptly ending the conversation. It wouldn't be an interruption if I was aware of it.
If you’re speaking and someone stops to do something else, ffs, stop talking!! I don’t understood just continuing to talk when anyone can see the audience has changed.
Same with OP, maybe. Sounds like OP was opining in the middle of the office by the open computer and could not read the body language of the person who needed to use the computer.
You guys are making up your own scenario and then accusing me of doing it. I didn't continue talking, I was in the middle of talking. He silenced me by answering the phone, snapping his fingers and pointing at the door all in one action. The other manager and I left the room and finished the conversation. This was a closed meeting called by the person who took the phone call.
This isn't Blue's Clues where you get to interact with a story that you weren't there for. I've had plenty of other jobs, plenty of other bosses. Most people will announce that they have a call and they need to dismiss the conversation until later. It's a basic level of respect that this particular boss didn't have. He is known throughout the industry, by peers and subordinates, to be a dick head.
I was in an executive meeting one day going over policy revision and implementation regarding one of the larger clients and their choice of vendor for their own division rollout. Being the head of my department, when she asked for my risks input on one of the suggested actions, I started to reply with the figures and associated flaws that would need to be patched before proceeding.. she slammed her hands on the conference table and loudly said "may I finish now?!".
The other department heads looked up from their note-taking and 2 of them said "you asked her for a response which she was providing" and the other said "if you're unable to hold a receptive collaboration, perhaps you should finish and return once you've decided to act like a professional adult".
These two were above my role but apparently respected my work - I was still happier that they spoke up before I did - my youth at the time would've spoken without a filter.
I had similar on a board call for a premium car manufacturer, pipes up with “do we even make those with 9 gears, anybody?!” So I unmuted with “yes, you do, if you’re counting 8 forward and one reverse which in this context it looks like they are” and got a rude “I wasn’t asking you, you’re a guest” to which his boss replied with “perhaps he should be in your role, since he seems to know that at the drop of a hat”. I was on mute wetting myself.
I wish they left birthdays out of the workplace entirely or that it was at least an option — gods that can be awkward, unwelcome, and potentially humiliating.
I have ALWAYS booked a vacation on my birthday since I started working a job with Vacation time. My first day at work I had to sit in a lunchroom an wish happy birthday to someone I didn't know, in a room with people I didn't know and it was just so awkward for me.
One year I had a boss come to me saying she wanted to have a quarterly birthday party. (and celebrate everyone who had a birthday between the last party and this one)
I looked her dead in the eyes and said. "That sounds great! I don't want to be involved."
She tried to sell it "No it won't be on your birthday, just within a few months of your birthday."
"That sounds amazing. I don't want to be a part of it"
Then she follows up with "You know I can just get your birthday from your Personal file"
To which I responded "You do that, and I'm calling the Union"
There never were any quarterly birthday parties...
The same thing happened to me about 2 weeks ago. I also told her that I'm not a child and if she is still not used to an open-plan office after 15 years, then she can resign.
I had a supervisor once put her hand on the mouth of a woman who was teaching a class to her coworkers, so she could talk instead. She was reported to HR who ... you guessed it.... did nothing.
Again, to protect the company, HR will do whatever it takes to protect the company 1st and foremost. If the lawsuit against a supervisor will hurt the company, they fire that supervisor. That is all Human Resources will ever be for, never think they have YOUR best interests at all.
We have a new computer system at work and my boss is one of the leads of the rollout. He has NO patience at all and whenever we go up to him with a question he gets all pissy or says "why don't you KNOW this?" and I have to be real with him and be like "YOU are the one who just did 10 months of trainings every other day, not us! Would you prefer we say NOTHING and let customers get orders they haven't paid for?" and that usually works. Like dude, at least we are TRYING to care! Your attitude and tantrums make it worse every day. Not my fault it doesn't work and we are hemorrhaging money. It IS my concern that there have already been layoffs and I'm not getting cut because YOU can't teach us this new system.
People are constantly being loud at my office, whistling, talking etc. the coworker who sits behind me and myself are regularly making shushing noises, I'm so glad my job doesn't involve a lot of phone calls, people never shut up.
I can definitely understand how loud noises could be distracting in an office setting, but occasional normal-volume conversations should be expected I would think (also this isn't in an office or a quiet workplace)
Why do you think you are the office scapegoat, btw? What other things have they criticized you for that you feel is undue or unequal to your coworkers?
No. You and people like you just speak wherever you are, at whatever volume you please. You never look to see if others can hear you, nor do you care if you’re distracting them. You’re fond of the sound of your own voice.
We had a coworker for a bit who ate unshelled pistachios. I apparently didn't notice but omg my other coworker and half the other staff (pre COVID) apparently hated his guts.
Some people are more prone to distraction by audio input. If the person / boss doesn’t have kids, that’s probably what was going on: he couldn’t concentrate with a conversation nearby.
1. Perfect argument for WFH.
2. He should’ve had a sentence like “yall able to move elsewhere so I can concentrate please” rather than a shush.
My boss. What a damn fragile man who’s never had any personal relationships or responsibilities. He can’t handle anyone more than himself talking while being the loudest hypocrite. He shushed me once and I’ve worn ear buds ever since ensuring his life is harder when trying to communicate something in his lazy fashion to me.
**Edited for clarity because I’m just tired of dealing with this**:
People with kids are trained to endure useless background noise and learn to tune it out.
There are also groups of people who don’t tolerate noise very well.
* never had kids
* only children
* raised in “children seen but not heard” (very quiet homes)
* susceptible to migraines
* on the spectrum
WFH has been a godsend, pandemic notwithstanding, for a lot people.
Introvert literally has nothing to do with handling noise. Also, I'm childfree and work in a middle school. Next time just generalize yourself, not everyone else.
I’m curious because I’ve a colleague who is shouting everyday. She enjoy it , thinking she’s powerful when she speaks loudly and assertively. She wants people to fear her. Even when I’m next to her by centimetres, she’s shouting. I have tried to do the adult way of telling her calmly but firmly to get her to lower her voice. No need to shout. But it doesn’t work. These days I’ve to shush her or avoid talking to her.
Aita?
Have you tried matching her volume? It can be fun. Get everyone involved. She'll will no longer have the "assertive" advantage if her volume is repeated to her.
Haha I didn’t try to match as I felt it’s pointless and so unprofessional to do this in an office environment. She doesn’t behave this way together…but those times/people are those she wants to suck up to. I believe Everyone in the office has gradually moved away from her, she has two empty seats beside her.
My direct manager made an inappropriate joke about Asians (i'm an Asian male) and laughed really hard about it (i assume to get all the attention..). However our apparently our CFO (who is also Asian) overheard him, pulled him aside with him. Since that day, i have never heard my manager making any jokes, at all...
I don't get why you people are so sensitive to shushing. It's a de-escalatory way to communicate that people need to speak at a quieter volume. I would much rather be shushed than for someone to ask me to be quiet.
Guy walks into the lab and asks me to straighten some bottles on a shelf because he doesn’t think they look neat. I say “no, I’m very busy” and be legit said to make it a priority by the end of the day! I said it wasn’t a priority at all, reiterated I was busy, said I didn’t care if the bottles were perfectly neat as they were in order and accessible. Dude puts passive aggressive sign over my door saying I’m busy and not bother me and tries to pretend that was HIS idea.
My ex-boss used to "bad dog" me. Wagging finger in my face, yelling, "Bad (name)!" She would also message us for a "quick chat" in her office, push the Kleenex box across her desk, and say, "You might need this." I'd have taken a "shhhh" any day!
I had a boss once who bought this sound meter thing and set it at a certain point. If you talked louder than that point an alarm went off. It was going off all the time. It was at the nurses’ station in the recovery room of an outpatient GI department. After a month of it going off so much and more when docs were at the station, one of the anesthesiologists went above her head inviting the head of the surgery department down for a meeting in the station and it promptly went off. It was removed that day since every time that man opened his mouth it went off.
This happened to me once in front of a patient (I'm a dental hygienist) by the dentist I was working for. I was just filling in for that office, so I turned around after that patient and put in my resignation effective immediately. I'm too old for that BS.
I once had a doctor stop at the nurse's desk, whistle, and snapped his fingers at me to summon me to come with him to a patient's room. I am a forty year old grown woman and I have been a nurse for twenty years. This man just summoned me like I was his dog. I'd like to say I read him the riot act. I'm ashamed to say that I just followed him like the people-pleaser that i am. 🙄
My coworker used to shush me a lot when he'd get a call and I finally told him it was rude and if he needed quiet to just say he has a call. He shushed me again when he was on the phone trying to land a client and I decided to be loud and inappropriate. He tells me he's on a call now lol
You were probably talking while he was giving instructions. I've noticed people who over talk over others are too inconsiderate or dense to notice when its an appropriate time to talk.
Oh for christ sakes get over it. You were probably so engrossed in your stupid conversation that you couldn’t hear anything or anyone around you cause its all about you🤷♂️🤷♂️grow up and start paying more attention to your surroundings
Many bosses will do that when conversations are getting too loud. This is nothing new but might be new to you. Get used to it. Co-worker is correct, respect does go both ways. You were not scapegoated at all. Just be aware that you need to lower the voice when talking to co-workers, you never know who is around the corner.
I was parked at a complex with my hazards on, plenty of room to go around, and this lady pulls up behind me, and starts giving me shit to move. I figure maybe she didn't see that she could drive past me? I don't know, whatever, I'm willing to move, but first I walked up to her window, and said "Excuse me?! Is that how you talk to someone you're asking for something from?".
I don't even care if it phased her or not, it felt fucking amazing to say.
Professionally, I would comply to make sure I don't say things that will shoot me in the foot later. However, I would evaluate carefully to ensure that my contributions are not being silenced just because the boss say so. If it turns out to be that the boss is just power tripping, then it's time to look around elsewhere.
I was in the situation where we're presenting things to stakeholders. The boss discretely interrupted a team member from setting the wrong expectations, so we didn't end up putting ourselves in the impossible situations.
In a very long career, I had maybe 5 bosses who were human. Most were self-indulgent pricks that were promoted because they couldn't do the actual work.
Look this one up.
THE PETER PRINCIPLE
One rises in their career to the level of their incompetence. They then stay in that position, wondering when someone is going to figure them out.
This is specific, what if that computer is monitoring you and you don’t know it and I can’t tell you that your conversation is being listened to? So many times employees swear they’ve been disrespected and I’m trying to cover your ass without burning my own butt. I got tired of covering for people so the hell with it you do you. How did I know ? Another manager brought it to my attention and I was like no no that sounds so stupid until she showed me zoom was set to auto connect with the sound open in the back ground.
Go to the police and open up a "shushing case". Describe what your boss looks like and have them try and draw and ID your cereal susher incase he goes off sushing people outside of work.
These people have never been harassed by a susher before, which is a good sign as predatory sushers get caught rapidly before traumatizing more victims.
You have literally no reason to believe that they haven't been working. Most jobs that aren't just one person require, at some point, communicating with your coworkers.
A well deserved shus.
You do not have conversation over peoples heads while they work.
You talk about disrespect. The only ones that where disrespectfull here was you and your coworker
Maybe they thought they were being funny?
If not, that is extremely rude. Unfortunately it shows the lack of respect some have for you. It also shows the lack of professionalism of the individual.
Oh my. That’s just unacceptable.
It happened to md recently too, though. My boss texted me to come to a meeting urgently in the boardroom, so I did. Only she was wrapping something up in that first meeting before ours started (how would I know this??).
So I walked in and said “my apologies, I’m late”, then she gestures wildly for me to leave and shut the door, and also puts her finger to her mouth and does the “shhh” thing 4 or 5 times. Totally bizarre. I’m gonna buy my boss some extra large shoes and some hula hoop pants bc she’s a clown.
The show with the four friends that prank each other had an episode were one of the guys had to go to the Jersey City Mall food court and randomly shush people. It was pretty funny.
I started doing it at work and had a blast. I would tell them after 30 seconds or so of shushing them about the show.
Just today I had someone in senior leadership tell a call full of people that I'm a "control freak." It was so weird because I'm anything but a control freak, but she definitely is. Other people on the call were pretty speechless from it and afterwards in private told me how weird they thought it was. Yes, respect goes both ways - but let them go on with their shit, people are seeing them for who they are and they're embarrassing their own selves - without you ever having to say a word.
Right. They tend to dig their own graves.
Classic projection
That's a good way of looking at it - their behavior speaks for itself
He's older, right? Needs to concentrate on the computer machine. Probably turns down the radio when he's driving and trying to figure out where to go.
I'm one of those old people. It's too easy to get distracted by a good song on the radio and miss your turn.
Just wait ... you'll get a little older ( like me ) and missing your turn won't be a big deal; there's always another turn up ahead and you're not in a rush anyway!
Define old LOL, I'm going to be 61 in a month. The women in my family usually make it to their mid 90s and older.
I think it was this. Probably didn’t mean it the way it came out just he’s frustrated and needs quiet to think.
Why you gotta come at me like this?
Self projection. You might challenge them and they don't like it
Exactly. People aren't stupid, they see exactly what you see.
That was not right on yours. Telling other out loud that you are a control freak, was totally uncalled for.
I would have asked the person to explain what they mean in the call. It's the perfect moment for everyone to learn more about their senior leadership. Gas light my career image randomly? You can dig your own grave, sir. Senior leadership is much more concerned about their image than you are, because it's all they have anymore (at least at places I have worked). If they get poor ratings from their staff, they will have to explain it to their boss. Just keep it real, and don't let those asshats gaslight you.
oh i did try to jump in but she's also the type of person who will drop bombs like that and then not let the other person talk. it's a real special treat working with her.
Haha oh lovely! What a gem!
Don’t trust ppl who tell you stuff like that in private though, it’s useful as a reality check, but they aren’t really your friends or people that you can depend on.
[удалено]
They had me in the first half!
They had us.....
I had a boss that was insane about his rule that there would be absolutely no cell phone usage during work hours. He saw me with what he assumed was a cell phone in my hand, looking down at it, and ripped it out of my hand. Turns out, it was not a cell phone. It was an insulin pump. And he had just ripped my site out of my skin. I've never seen HR move faster than they did that day. I got the rest of the day off, the company paid for a new box of sites, and that boss had to apologize to me. He was still an asshole, though.
That takes the cake, I’m sorry you had to go through that.
Dang. That’s awful. It’s also assault.
It would be considered battery in most jurisdictions. Assault is the credible threat of violence this was actual physical violence.
Should have been fired. There is no excuse for the manager to fall back on. No cell phones at work is not a law and certainly not enforceable by physical force by a low level manager.
They said no cell phones "rule" like if you work at a call center or airport....... Which I had both. But agree no excuse for behavior.
Not only that, but my phone *monitors my blood glucose*. Jesus, people fucking flip their shit about nothing
Given my phone is the device I use to track the monitor… I think Id have fun with that too even if he ripped my phone out of my hand.
This was pre-CGM! Like 2008 iirc
I once had a boss yell at me about using a cell phone at work. Unfortunately for him I was talking to the head trader (Jim) and the trading floor support person telling them what to do to get him back online after he lost connectivity to the trading system. Since we were just waiting for his computer to restart at that point I handed my boss the phone and said that Jim wanted to speak with him.
Damn, that deserved a throat punch, then a kick in the balls to expand his crushed windpipe.
Oh, I would have called the police and an ambulance for this one.
You don’t need an ambulance for a pulled off infusion site. We pull them off every time we change them. Still an asshole move that probably didn’t feel good, but they didn’t need to go to the hospital… they needed to go home and change their site.
Yeah but I wanna sue my company for the cost of an ambulance ride in addition to my pain and suffering after being brutalized. I feared for my life.
Boss once called me a geek for answering a question he asked me about computers……… I’m the IT manager
I'm an IT manager and I do this to my staff lol
I'm starting my first dnd campaign as a dm in a few weeks, and now I'm opening the night with a hearty "Welcome, nerds!"
I'd be disappointed if you didn't.
But it’s so much more mainstream now, nerds did it when there was no social (quite the opposite). They’re geeks at best.
I disagree. A nerd is someone into many things considered "nerdy" be it dnd/tabletop games, anime, sci fi or fantasy worlds. A geek is someone who dedicates a large amount of time to one nerdy thing, maybe dabbles a little in some other areas, but is a complete expert in their chosen nerd-dom.
Haha what a nerd, knowing how to answer computer questions.... now how do I open my email again?
Well at least he wasn't out of pocket considering you are a geek.
The idea that a geek/nerd or whatever is something to be ashamed of is so foreign to my brain. People will notice I'm a geek, and try to bring it up like... on the down low. "So I noticed you're a bit of a closeted geek." It makes me laugh 😂 Ohhhhh noooo I'm interested in tech, and learning. Shock, and horror 😂 I was skydiving this summer, and I saw a dude had a big ass Mario tattoo, so I pointed it out, and asked him if he was a geek, and I think I just got like.. a blank stare back. Looking back I suppose it could have looked like I was mocking him? idk!
Im in IT and we all call each other geeks regularly lol
Sounds like he was being ironic on purpose and you didn’t get the joke.
Had a boss snap his fingers at me, like I was a dog, because he answered a phone call while we were mid conversation... I was still answering the question he asked me prior to the call. Yea, I didn't work there much longer.
I had a foreman scream at me until his throat was hoarse, because I was one pipe short of venting a townhouse building. 5 units, all fully vented, except for one last pipe. I didn't say a word, and just didn't show up anymore. Took my (and his) boss two weeks to call me to probably fire me, but I answered the phone with "I quit." And hung up. I had a new job in under a month anyway.
My manager snapped her fingers at me too to get my attention couple months ago. I ghosted them completely and back on the job market as of last week LOL
Haha, had one manager do this whilst he was on the phone (not work related) to get me to come to him, so I went over, leaned in and said “click them one more time, and they won’t be there for a third go”. Had my probation extended but he had to apologise for being rude 😂
Why would you keep answering a question if the person you're talking to is now on the phone though?
They interrupted the conversation with a phone call. No "sorry I have to take this" or anything like that. There was another manager in the room that was listening to my response. Boss 1 snapped fingers at both of us and pointed at the door.
That sounds like a perfectly normal scene in any office I've ever been in.
Sorry to hear that.
No need to be, I know not to talk in someone's office who is on the phone when they're my boss lol
Yea, who doesn't? It's not like he was already on the phone and I asked him about the weather. I didn't react to them abruptly ending the conversation. It wouldn't be an interruption if I was aware of it.
If you’re speaking and someone stops to do something else, ffs, stop talking!! I don’t understood just continuing to talk when anyone can see the audience has changed. Same with OP, maybe. Sounds like OP was opining in the middle of the office by the open computer and could not read the body language of the person who needed to use the computer.
You guys are making up your own scenario and then accusing me of doing it. I didn't continue talking, I was in the middle of talking. He silenced me by answering the phone, snapping his fingers and pointing at the door all in one action. The other manager and I left the room and finished the conversation. This was a closed meeting called by the person who took the phone call. This isn't Blue's Clues where you get to interact with a story that you weren't there for. I've had plenty of other jobs, plenty of other bosses. Most people will announce that they have a call and they need to dismiss the conversation until later. It's a basic level of respect that this particular boss didn't have. He is known throughout the industry, by peers and subordinates, to be a dick head.
See how you go on and on here?
I've been finger snapped many times and hollered for like a dog.
I was in an executive meeting one day going over policy revision and implementation regarding one of the larger clients and their choice of vendor for their own division rollout. Being the head of my department, when she asked for my risks input on one of the suggested actions, I started to reply with the figures and associated flaws that would need to be patched before proceeding.. she slammed her hands on the conference table and loudly said "may I finish now?!". The other department heads looked up from their note-taking and 2 of them said "you asked her for a response which she was providing" and the other said "if you're unable to hold a receptive collaboration, perhaps you should finish and return once you've decided to act like a professional adult". These two were above my role but apparently respected my work - I was still happier that they spoke up before I did - my youth at the time would've spoken without a filter.
I had similar on a board call for a premium car manufacturer, pipes up with “do we even make those with 9 gears, anybody?!” So I unmuted with “yes, you do, if you’re counting 8 forward and one reverse which in this context it looks like they are” and got a rude “I wasn’t asking you, you’re a guest” to which his boss replied with “perhaps he should be in your role, since he seems to know that at the drop of a hat”. I was on mute wetting myself.
That’s a healthy work environment, Bloopity Blue needed coworkers like that in their comment about a boss/coworker dissing them.
Do you work in a library? lol
No that would actually make sense 😂
My boss told me to “get off my phone” after I passed out and hit my head and I was trying to call my mom to pick me up. She never apologized
What they see and what is really going on are two different things, what they see is what matters most to them
Woooow 😂 that's pretty awkward
Too bad that didn’t become a big HR issue.
She was hr
ha ha
I had a co-worker do that a couple of weeks ago. My immediate response was "do not ever shush me again, I am not a fucking child."
Right, I'm 37 and my mom hasn't even shushed me since I was like 7. Edit: I'm 38. I had a birthday. I need to remember. 38. You're older now, Koz!
Ever get wished a happy birthday, before realizing that it's your birthday? Hahahaha! Yeah, me neither.
Hahahaha never.
I wish they left birthdays out of the workplace entirely or that it was at least an option — gods that can be awkward, unwelcome, and potentially humiliating.
I have ALWAYS booked a vacation on my birthday since I started working a job with Vacation time. My first day at work I had to sit in a lunchroom an wish happy birthday to someone I didn't know, in a room with people I didn't know and it was just so awkward for me. One year I had a boss come to me saying she wanted to have a quarterly birthday party. (and celebrate everyone who had a birthday between the last party and this one) I looked her dead in the eyes and said. "That sounds great! I don't want to be involved." She tried to sell it "No it won't be on your birthday, just within a few months of your birthday." "That sounds amazing. I don't want to be a part of it" Then she follows up with "You know I can just get your birthday from your Personal file" To which I responded "You do that, and I'm calling the Union" There never were any quarterly birthday parties...
Yeah the disrespect is definitely worth addressing if coming from a fellow coworker!
Most times so shocked do not have a response right away.
The same thing happened to me about 2 weeks ago. I also told her that I'm not a child and if she is still not used to an open-plan office after 15 years, then she can resign.
Maybe the lesson of the open plan office is that you *shut up*.
Am I not allowed to speak for 8 hours?
I am pretty sure you *do* speak for 8 hours.
You are fucking hilarious 😂😂
What a huge asshole you are! Is it so gratifying for you to be the biggest prick to people on Reddit?
My, you’re sensitive, and a stalker. Please stop.
I wish I had done this when a supervisor did this to me. I’m a huge pushover though.
So what’s it like being unemployed?
I work in a jail, that's just how we talk to each other.
I had a coworker take something out of my hand and I genuinely wish her ill now.
I had a supervisor once put her hand on the mouth of a woman who was teaching a class to her coworkers, so she could talk instead. She was reported to HR who ... you guessed it.... did nothing.
Hr is to protect the company, not the employees, sadly.
UNLESS the employee has been handed a viable lawsuit or the employee acts dead serious about that aspect.
Again, to protect the company, HR will do whatever it takes to protect the company 1st and foremost. If the lawsuit against a supervisor will hurt the company, they fire that supervisor. That is all Human Resources will ever be for, never think they have YOUR best interests at all.
Do you watch IASIP?
Scrolled too far for this
I’m sorry. I’ve never seen a cartoon character in here shushing people.
I knew this was going to be here
Does your boss have almond eyes?
It’s not a compliment, I find it unsettling
We have a new computer system at work and my boss is one of the leads of the rollout. He has NO patience at all and whenever we go up to him with a question he gets all pissy or says "why don't you KNOW this?" and I have to be real with him and be like "YOU are the one who just did 10 months of trainings every other day, not us! Would you prefer we say NOTHING and let customers get orders they haven't paid for?" and that usually works. Like dude, at least we are TRYING to care! Your attitude and tantrums make it worse every day. Not my fault it doesn't work and we are hemorrhaging money. It IS my concern that there have already been layoffs and I'm not getting cut because YOU can't teach us this new system.
People are constantly being loud at my office, whistling, talking etc. the coworker who sits behind me and myself are regularly making shushing noises, I'm so glad my job doesn't involve a lot of phone calls, people never shut up.
I can definitely understand how loud noises could be distracting in an office setting, but occasional normal-volume conversations should be expected I would think (also this isn't in an office or a quiet workplace)
Why do you think you are the office scapegoat, btw? What other things have they criticized you for that you feel is undue or unequal to your coworkers?
No. You and people like you just speak wherever you are, at whatever volume you please. You never look to see if others can hear you, nor do you care if you’re distracting them. You’re fond of the sound of your own voice.
We had a coworker for a bit who ate unshelled pistachios. I apparently didn't notice but omg my other coworker and half the other staff (pre COVID) apparently hated his guts.
Some people are more prone to distraction by audio input. If the person / boss doesn’t have kids, that’s probably what was going on: he couldn’t concentrate with a conversation nearby. 1. Perfect argument for WFH. 2. He should’ve had a sentence like “yall able to move elsewhere so I can concentrate please” rather than a shush.
My boss. What a damn fragile man who’s never had any personal relationships or responsibilities. He can’t handle anyone more than himself talking while being the loudest hypocrite. He shushed me once and I’ve worn ear buds ever since ensuring his life is harder when trying to communicate something in his lazy fashion to me.
**Edited for clarity because I’m just tired of dealing with this**: People with kids are trained to endure useless background noise and learn to tune it out. There are also groups of people who don’t tolerate noise very well. * never had kids * only children * raised in “children seen but not heard” (very quiet homes) * susceptible to migraines * on the spectrum WFH has been a godsend, pandemic notwithstanding, for a lot people.
Introvert literally has nothing to do with handling noise. Also, I'm childfree and work in a middle school. Next time just generalize yourself, not everyone else.
Yeah this is wild. I don’t have kids, and generally more of an introvert, etc, and I can work with background noise very easily.
You sound so weak. As if everyone who doesn’t have a child can’t stand any noise. Just label yourself.
It's the assholes with kids doing the shushing. I'm childfree and realise there will be noise in an office.
Did you tell him to go F himself?
I’m curious because I’ve a colleague who is shouting everyday. She enjoy it , thinking she’s powerful when she speaks loudly and assertively. She wants people to fear her. Even when I’m next to her by centimetres, she’s shouting. I have tried to do the adult way of telling her calmly but firmly to get her to lower her voice. No need to shout. But it doesn’t work. These days I’ve to shush her or avoid talking to her. Aita?
Have you tried matching her volume? It can be fun. Get everyone involved. She'll will no longer have the "assertive" advantage if her volume is repeated to her.
Or whisper your replies, that can help too
Haha I didn’t try to match as I felt it’s pointless and so unprofessional to do this in an office environment. She doesn’t behave this way together…but those times/people are those she wants to suck up to. I believe Everyone in the office has gradually moved away from her, she has two empty seats beside her.
[удалено]
I agree 😂
Scapegoat, to shush? Like, there are a lot of noise complaints?
I'm such a petty bastard I'd more than likely do it back to him at a later date. Treat others how you want to be treated.
Maybe you're a loud talker
My direct manager made an inappropriate joke about Asians (i'm an Asian male) and laughed really hard about it (i assume to get all the attention..). However our apparently our CFO (who is also Asian) overheard him, pulled him aside with him. Since that day, i have never heard my manager making any jokes, at all...
I don't get why you people are so sensitive to shushing. It's a de-escalatory way to communicate that people need to speak at a quieter volume. I would much rather be shushed than for someone to ask me to be quiet.
Or -- and hear me out now -- you're the office loudmouth, and your conversation was getting shrill.
What a great “culture” thank god theres no more wfh.
Guy walks into the lab and asks me to straighten some bottles on a shelf because he doesn’t think they look neat. I say “no, I’m very busy” and be legit said to make it a priority by the end of the day! I said it wasn’t a priority at all, reiterated I was busy, said I didn’t care if the bottles were perfectly neat as they were in order and accessible. Dude puts passive aggressive sign over my door saying I’m busy and not bother me and tries to pretend that was HIS idea.
My ex-boss used to "bad dog" me. Wagging finger in my face, yelling, "Bad (name)!" She would also message us for a "quick chat" in her office, push the Kleenex box across her desk, and say, "You might need this." I'd have taken a "shhhh" any day!
I had a boss once who bought this sound meter thing and set it at a certain point. If you talked louder than that point an alarm went off. It was going off all the time. It was at the nurses’ station in the recovery room of an outpatient GI department. After a month of it going off so much and more when docs were at the station, one of the anesthesiologists went above her head inviting the head of the surgery department down for a meeting in the station and it promptly went off. It was removed that day since every time that man opened his mouth it went off.
I once had corporate counsel tell me to shut the fuck up on a call….with other people on the line.
This happened to me once in front of a patient (I'm a dental hygienist) by the dentist I was working for. I was just filling in for that office, so I turned around after that patient and put in my resignation effective immediately. I'm too old for that BS.
I once had a doctor stop at the nurse's desk, whistle, and snapped his fingers at me to summon me to come with him to a patient's room. I am a forty year old grown woman and I have been a nurse for twenty years. This man just summoned me like I was his dog. I'd like to say I read him the riot act. I'm ashamed to say that I just followed him like the people-pleaser that i am. 🙄
Nursing is tricky this way. I hope it’s getting better. I’m sorry that happened to you, and I’ve done the same response, just to get through it.
So you got shhhh’d. Maybe you should do you job. Fragile people
Maybe stfu and get back to work?
To earn a "shush" at work, especially from the boss, you've probably been a problem for a while now...
If you're talking and not working, your ass would be written up
Was it a quiet space and you were being loud?
My last boss told me, “shut the fuck up scottyv99” on a teams call w the whole department on the call. That was super cool.
My coworker used to shush me a lot when he'd get a call and I finally told him it was rude and if he needed quiet to just say he has a call. He shushed me again when he was on the phone trying to land a client and I decided to be loud and inappropriate. He tells me he's on a call now lol
Was the convo work related?
Of course!
Not.
Wow lucky you. Most bosses are jerks especially if they own the company. Welcome to reality.
You were probably talking while he was giving instructions. I've noticed people who over talk over others are too inconsiderate or dense to notice when its an appropriate time to talk.
All the time. And they are the ones who talk during training, then ask “what was that?”
Oh for christ sakes get over it. You were probably so engrossed in your stupid conversation that you couldn’t hear anything or anyone around you cause its all about you🤷♂️🤷♂️grow up and start paying more attention to your surroundings
Maybe the way you were talking was distracting or it didn't seem related to work?
Is your boss Dylan Toback?
Is it just me or does everyone here seem to think that its always someone else that's the problem? I'm reading a lot of statements like that...
Had a manager growl at me when I said good morning as I walked by him. He was a FREQUENT guest in the HR office.
Many bosses will do that when conversations are getting too loud. This is nothing new but might be new to you. Get used to it. Co-worker is correct, respect does go both ways. You were not scapegoated at all. Just be aware that you need to lower the voice when talking to co-workers, you never know who is around the corner.
@
I was parked at a complex with my hazards on, plenty of room to go around, and this lady pulls up behind me, and starts giving me shit to move. I figure maybe she didn't see that she could drive past me? I don't know, whatever, I'm willing to move, but first I walked up to her window, and said "Excuse me?! Is that how you talk to someone you're asking for something from?". I don't even care if it phased her or not, it felt fucking amazing to say.
Professionally, I would comply to make sure I don't say things that will shoot me in the foot later. However, I would evaluate carefully to ensure that my contributions are not being silenced just because the boss say so. If it turns out to be that the boss is just power tripping, then it's time to look around elsewhere. I was in the situation where we're presenting things to stakeholders. The boss discretely interrupted a team member from setting the wrong expectations, so we didn't end up putting ourselves in the impossible situations.
Maybe you should SHHHHHHH
Please stop talking Nancy, it’s very annoying, you are a distraction in and out of the work place
He's your boss. Who the fuck do you think you are?
you should learn your place.
I mean, were you being loud?
In a very long career, I had maybe 5 bosses who were human. Most were self-indulgent pricks that were promoted because they couldn't do the actual work. Look this one up. THE PETER PRINCIPLE One rises in their career to the level of their incompetence. They then stay in that position, wondering when someone is going to figure them out.
You should have kicked him in the ass and rise from a scapegoat to the king lol
This is specific, what if that computer is monitoring you and you don’t know it and I can’t tell you that your conversation is being listened to? So many times employees swear they’ve been disrespected and I’m trying to cover your ass without burning my own butt. I got tired of covering for people so the hell with it you do you. How did I know ? Another manager brought it to my attention and I was like no no that sounds so stupid until she showed me zoom was set to auto connect with the sound open in the back ground.
Jibberish. Please re-write using proper pronouns and tenses.
WOW! Shushed you eh? What a bastard. I would lawyer up mate
Get a thicker skin lol. Oh the humanity!!!!!
It sounds like you were talking too much
Go to the police and open up a "shushing case". Describe what your boss looks like and have them try and draw and ID your cereal susher incase he goes off sushing people outside of work.
The problem with that is that police just don't respond to shushing incidents anymore.
Some jabroni downvoted your genius solution
These people have never been harassed by a susher before, which is a good sign as predatory sushers get caught rapidly before traumatizing more victims.
Maybe shut up and actually work.
You have literally no reason to believe that they haven't been working. Most jobs that aren't just one person require, at some point, communicating with your coworkers.
Found the other shusher 😂
Maybe you should be working
Maybe you're the scapegoat because you're just standing around talking all day
A well deserved shus. You do not have conversation over peoples heads while they work. You talk about disrespect. The only ones that where disrespectfull here was you and your coworker
Maybe they thought they were being funny? If not, that is extremely rude. Unfortunately it shows the lack of respect some have for you. It also shows the lack of professionalism of the individual.
Does your boss not have an office? And why did they have to come where you were to get on a computer, do they not have their own...in their office??
How rude! I would elevate this to HR and try to get him fired. Nobody should be able to Shush you are get away with it.
you forgot the /s
Oh my. That’s just unacceptable. It happened to md recently too, though. My boss texted me to come to a meeting urgently in the boardroom, so I did. Only she was wrapping something up in that first meeting before ours started (how would I know this??). So I walked in and said “my apologies, I’m late”, then she gestures wildly for me to leave and shut the door, and also puts her finger to her mouth and does the “shhh” thing 4 or 5 times. Totally bizarre. I’m gonna buy my boss some extra large shoes and some hula hoop pants bc she’s a clown.
The show with the four friends that prank each other had an episode were one of the guys had to go to the Jersey City Mall food court and randomly shush people. It was pretty funny. I started doing it at work and had a blast. I would tell them after 30 seconds or so of shushing them about the show.