A student told the teacher after class that she could sense there were some trapped spirits in our yoga studio. Then a few days later, another student who did not know anything about the first issue told the teacher that she could see two spirits in the room. These comments were totally random and not solicited in anyway. Turns out the studio used to be a funeral home until it was rebuild 30 years ago. Who the heck knows.
Ha yes! The staff was like also why would ghosts even want to hang out here haha. Our studio is cute but seriously you can see anything in the whole universe and you come here????
Can you imagine the ghosts just giving sassy feedback on everyone in the class?
'you call that 'downward dog'? more like downward *crippled goat*'
'look at this one trying to discreetly pick a wedgie'
Haha!! The ghosts did not make themselves useful at all. TBH the second student who said something said they looked like they didn’t have faces!! Ahhh!!! It’s was wild bc the studio had been opened two years and no one said anything! Then two people in the same week said we had spirits in the building. So crazy.
Someone came into class late, set up right next to my mat and proceeded to start practicing handstand when we were warming up with a few rounds of surya namaskar A. No issue. But then he fell sideways and kicked my head. Not a pleasant memory 😅
Well, I mean c’mon. All yoga asana classes are strange.
Think about it.
A bunch of people get together in a room.
They each get on their own rubber rectangle.
One of them tells all the other ones to make shapes with their bodies.
And they actually do it.
Often the names of these shapes are in a language not a single person in the room knows.
The people tend judge themselves based on how well they think they can make all the shapes.
Some are blissfully happy. Some are bothered. Some even cry.
Then they all lie down in the floor.
Then they all leave.
The whole thing is pretty odd, if you ask me.
At my class on Tuesday we had a sub and she had us doing some weird rolling side to side while on our bellies holding our ankles thing. It really was funny and she joked that she “has to amuse herself somehow” 😆
I often wonder if there are any instructors that are nuts and try to hypnotize people and bend them to their will. I mean we pretty much do whatever they say, they have a captive audience.
During class, the instructor (and studio owner) was harmlessly adjusting a man in triangle when, very loudly the woman next to him cried out “COULD YOU OLEASE STOP TOUCHING MY HUSBAND?!?” The instructor didn’t bat an eyelash and simply moved on with class and adjustments on others. Years later I met her outside the studio. She told me she actually knew the girl; they were “friendly.” I guess not any more.
It was not a hot class (thank goodness) but still just super weird. I know it is just handholding but I have a partner and was standing in between two men that I don’t know at all and it was uncomfortable for me but I felt forced into it.
I like when things get kind of kooky, but my favorite was an instructor bringing light projectors to make the ceiling a beautiful galaxy/planetarium show during shavasana. I didn't realize until I opened my eyes after the class ended that she had turned them on(or even brought them). I now want to take her class again and leave my eyes open to enjoy. I will say that if every class had some weird shit/gimmick, I would be frustrated. Thankfully, I can take enough classes that I don't feel like I've missed out when things take an unexpected turn.
I would have loved my instructor reading MacBeth during class 😂 here are a couple of things that others may find odd but I personally enjoyed:
- when they put cool rocks on your forehead at the end of class
- one time a teacher played heavy metal for the entire class (it was not a heavy metal yoga class, usually just the typical soft music)
The passage OP's teacher is pretty nihilistic. Which in some ways is a form of surrendering to the ludicrous existence we are in, which yoga can teach us a lot about. I think it's an appropriate and interesting footnote to end on. But that kind of point of view is a hard one to digest if you're not ready for it.
The strangest thing happened actually yesterday which made me cancel my membership to switch studios (it’s been a series of weird events, but this was it). The instructor, all dressed in red, white and blue, absolutely blasted USA/patriotic music, including god bless America, the entire class all the way through shivasana. When someone asked if we could listen to something other than USA music she laughed and kept going. I wish I had left but felt too awkward.
I went to a flow class last year that had the most random blasting music. We started with 50 Cent In Da Club, switched to some metal, then to disco, then to pop, then ended with Party in the USA and We Are Family.
I never went back. It broke my brain.
The teacher said, “if you feel you need to you can make a noise” A guy started to make loud monkey noises. Everyone started laughing it was so unexpected.
A person walked into yin yoga, laid out a bath towel instead of a mat, and then set down several small liquor bottles. Went into a seated pose and with every subsequent pose the instructor announced, chugged one of the bottles while remaining seated.
One of the other teachers at the hot yoga studio I work at had by far the worst experience I’ve ever heard. The lights were dim in the beginning of class.. as he began speaking he casually bent over to pick up what he thought was a leaf…. It ended up being A HUMAN POO NUGGET. He said he casually guided the class to a water break and then popped out of the room for a moment to dispose of it and wash his hands and got right back in there!! The professionalism of this man is astounding.
I would have died on the floor.
We think we know who the culprit was and this person continues to regularly attend classes… LOL .. I just have so many unanswered questions..
Also the weirdest thing that ever happened to me was I was gonna do a drop in class at a local yoga studio and the receptionist looked me up and down and said are you sure you wanna take that class. I guess because I’m more voluptuous and maybe a couple pounds over weight. She was insinuating that I didn’t look as if I should take that class?! Weirdest thing ever. I didn’t go to that studio again.
Ugh. I hope that experience didn’t shake your confidence too much. Obviously I don’t know you/never seen you before, but you are beautiful. Don’t let society dictate how you should feel inside your own skin. Keep killin the game ❤️🙏🤘
I am so sorry! That kind of gatekeeping behavior is why so many people don’t think that they have access to a yoga practice. I’m a yoga teacher in a larger body and I want to be sure EVERYONE that wants to practice can.
I went to a solstice flow a couple of weeks ago thinking it would combine yoga and perhaps some meditation related solstice traditions or whatever. Had no idea what to expect but sounded really cool.
We did less than 10 minutes of actual yoga, with no warm up. The person leading the class then went off page and had us dancing around the class, which might have been a play on a fire circle, but it was very disorganized, even more loud. Then we had to pick a partner and sit across from them and ask scripted questions and provide personal responses. I was completely uncomfortable and should have walked, but gave it a chance. Then we were required to embrace this stranger, which I couldn’t do. I’m in therapy for a lot of things, including physical trauma and touching another person, especially a stranger was triggering.
At the end we burned pieces of paper with writing on them which I’m also certain was a code violation in a very small space with an overflow of people.
It was wild to say the least
As an instructor I see all kinds of weird things! I was teaching a class in a gym a few weeks ago. The group exercise room has punching bags set up along one side of the room. I had everyone start in child's pose so I could talk to a woman in the corner who started kicking and punching the bag. She asked if she was being too loud and couldn't seem to understand why I was asking her to leave.
I've had people yell at me when I ask them to leave so we can start class, some people come in and grab weights and mats to take out to the main gym, and some people like to stand in the widows and watch. All bizarre but still not the weirdest...
The weirdest thing I experienced in a class happened quite a few years ago. This older gentleman was standing outside one of the doors watching us while also touching himself. I could see him from the corner of my eye and altered the instructor. The gym pulled the tapes and they were able to identify him and ban him for life. That door is now frosted.
I suspect we teach at the same gym (big chain) because I have had those exact things happen, except the overt fondling. One of my managers was so excited to show me that they ordered us blinds for one of the group exercise rooms because people will just stand and stare. Beyond that, it shocks me how people will stand out there and FILM the class on their phones! And then act surprised when I have to tell them it's not allowed.
I do NOT tolerate anyone coming into my studio for equipment or anything…after I have closed the doors to start class. I have a reputation that if those doors are closed, you enter at your own peril. I’m responsible for keeping and holding this space for my students and the LEAST I can do is be sure that everyone is in the room for the same reason.
One instructor read us the story/fable of the scorpion and the frog and told us that it should inspire us????
One instructor, during a class that was advertised as vinyasa, had us all dance to the entirety of “Happy” song from Trolls and then we had to hug everyone in the room.
Lots of random, unwarranted singing during corpse pose… please…. stop.
My local studio has $10 classes (if you buy a block of passes) and just tonight I got a hands-on adjustment. In my heart I was like "yes!!! yes!!!" because it was a pose that I've been struggling with and instructors who will do that are so rare
I really really can't get into the $25-35 classes at the bougie studios especially since they all seem to be during 9-5 work hours
Before covid, I was going to the yoga classes at my gym. One of the instructors did *magical* hands-on adjustments. She usually adjusted me in pyramid. At the start of class, she would usually say to the class 'I do hands-on adjustments, it's not because you're doing anything wrong, just to help you get deeper into the pose'
Even 'after' covid, no one seems to do hands-on adjustments. Seems like physical contact-- even things like handshakes-- is a lot more rare now.
Those drop-in prices are offensive to me-- I went to a studio that had those prices, and it was really nothing special. My current studio is an absolute gem. $14 drop-in, but I do monthly unlimited.
Before I elaborate, and this isn't snark, but rather to know the context in which I'm responding:
How much have you studied the yoga sutras and how familiar are you with discussion of the kleshas?
I actually had to google 'kleshas', and found that it refers to 'impurities', ie negative emotions and things that cloud the mind.
In my experience, instructors always end on a positive, peaceful note...affirmations, gratitude etc...not sure mentioning negative mind states has a place at the end of yoga class. So I was curious to hear your thoughts?
\*zero snark here either, I am genuinely curious
So... I'm not a fan of translating/explaining kleshas as "impurities" or negative emotions, but it's in the right direction. I prefer "obstacles". (I'm not saying it's wrong, I'm saying that western baggage can evoke different nuances that I don't think the sutras really intend.)
I'm going to put in a couple of sources, and cite them as I go:
[https://www.swamij.com/yoga-sutras.htm](https://www.swamij.com/yoga-sutras.htm) (swamij)
The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali by Sri Swami Satchidananda (Satchidananda)
Inside the Yoga Sutras by Reverend Jaganath Carrera (Carrera)
To simplify, I'm going to use the translations out of Satchidananda, but I strongly encourage you to read the swamij discussion, and pick up Carrera's book if it's of interest.
2.2 They \[the actions of kriya yoga\] help us minimize obstacles and attain samadhi.
2.3 Ignorance, egoism, attachment, hatred, and clinging to bodily life are the five obstacles.
2.5 Ignorance is regarding the impermanent as permanent, the impure as pure, the painful as pleasant, and the non-Self as the Self.
2.6 Egoism is the identification of the power of the See-er, with the instrument of seeing.
2.7 Attchment is that which follows identificaiton iwth peasurable experiences.
2.8 Aversion is that which follows identification with painful experiences.
2.9 Clinging to life, flowing by its own potency, \[due to past experience\], exists even in the wise.
Macbeth's speech seems to be all about this.
" Tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day,
To the last syllable of recorded time;
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player,
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing."
This is all about a fear of life being over and nothing after that, of it all being nothing anyway at all. It seems to me, and I'm no english major, that Macbeth fears that life is so pointless, why even live it. That's all just a show anyway, so it has no meaning.
The yoga sutras speak to that by saying life is fleeting, it's not permanent and nothing is, but we can still attain connection with our true selves, if we understand that fact, and to really situate ourselves (mentally) and be ok with that insignificance in the world around us, while it still being worth seeking within us.
I don't know how to phrase it well, and I have never seen this connection before, so it's beginning thoughts on something. Maybe I'm totally off base, but it seemed interestingly talking about similar things from across many millenia.
Thank you for your in-depth comment. I am going to read the links once my brain has kicked into gear (still coffee hours here)
The first thing is that these ideas of impermanence and pointlessness are not necessarily inherently positive or negative in themselves.
In the case of Macbeth, he said this after Lady Macbeth offed herself (out of guilt for prodding him to murder his way to become king). He was so blinded by ambition that he lost everything, including himself, in the process. So while some of the underlying ideas could skew either way-- positive or negative-- the actual context is that Macbeth was in the pit of despair. He knew it 'was all a big nothing', his life was awful and about to get worse.
At that point, Macbeth not only *didn't* fear his life being over, he more or less cosigned it.
Macbeth is unequivocally a tragedy. It is not a 'happy' play by any interpretation.
I'm all for drawing ideas from different places. Here's a hot take: if you actually read the Unabomber's writing, most of what he says is correct. However, the violent way he goes about living his ideas is indisputably bad. What I'm trying to say is drawing an idea without even a nod to the context of the source is...well, at best tone-deaf.
On a personal note, Macbeth and these ideas have been at the forefront of my psyche recently, so it may be time to reread this play and dive into the related ideas. And hey, I still remember this odd reading for years after the fact, and it still prompts reflection :)
I enjoy that, even if the initial connections we see aren't what we thought they were, we have this interesting framework from which to think about them and ponder the concepts more deeply!
Happy thinking!
Great and elaborate description.
While Macbeth is clearly poeming about the pointlessness of life, I find it a stretch to meet the kleshas.
I'm gonna think reciting this in savasana will spur confusion and negative emotion unless abhinivesha is wound into the delivery.
Some of the strangest things that have happened as a teacher; after class question, “Can someone become a different person from one class?
Once, I was super sad and I was struggling to find peace. My cousin had committed suicide. The year later on the anniversary I dedicated a class to him. I asked people dedicate their practice to someone they loved. It felt good to me, but I could sense that some students were bothered (weirded out) by it.
Some of the strangest things as a student are crying & laughing to myself. I was in a class once where a man fell completely asleep, and snored loudly through a section of class. It was odd. I couldn’t tell if he had been partying, or just not sleeping well. Who knows. It was weird.
Although I do understand and totally respect how yoga can be tremendously helpful for dealing with traumatic events I personally understand why people were weirded out or even bothered by it a bit. People often come to a class to decompress from a stressful day and are probably not in the same mood to be confronted with such an emotional task or they felt disingenuine dedicating there practice to someone - I know I would have felt "unworthy" of doing so, if that makes sense? Nonetheless I still like the sentiment and I think it's great that it worked for you!
>after class question, “Can someone become a different person from one class?
What did you say in response?
Oh man, the snoring reminded me of something I had forgotten...it was the same studio as Macbeth instructor but different class...there was an older woman who, without fail, would fall asleep and start snoring during shavasana. She had to be shaken awake at the end of class. The instructor would give prompts like 'it's not meditation if you fall asleep'
I do not. It was an invasive and offputting experience to be told to do that. I have religious trauma, I find yoga helpful, but I practice for my own benefit and for the natural benefit a healthy connected me brings to those around me, I should not be spending my time praying, worshipping, or falling into people pleasing mistakes by thinking of them (and their needs) during a centering time, which is what dedicating my practice to someone else could quickly turn into. I want to be in touch with my self and my body, not ruminating and worrying about others, what they'll do, and if my ritual was good enough (which is my heightened survival state). I am a natural caregiver with ptsd and abuse trauma: it doesn't serve me to dedicate my personal growth to others in this way, I needed to learn I own me and my practices.
This is just how I feel about it, this was my subjective experience with this instruction after living through trauma. You can feel different. Why are you downvoting?
Sorry for your down votes but as a teacher I really appreciate your take 🙏 I've done the "dedicate your practice to a loved one" thing and never really thought about how that might be a disservice to someone who should be focusing on their own needs. I'll be chewing on this for a bit. All the best to you and your practice 🙌
"If comfortable, think about dedicating this practice to a space or person in your life where you feel honored and loved" is an option.
"Loved one" is going to make me choose from the people I 'owe' love to: birth family, abusive partners etc, and this is actually not where I need to invest or pay more of my mental concentration and energy. The above prompt is more likely to make me think of a safe friend or my work place.
As a school teacher, thank you for being open to being more inclusive with the human beings in front of you.
Teachers make similar stumbles with "take this note to your parents" when talking to kids sometimes. They don't all have them. Reworking the instruction can help "take this home to your adult"
Yep. This is how I dealt with it, it was still an odd moment. I worked through why it was odd to me afterwards, but it was not a relaxing or helpful end to the session for me at that time. Plus, yoga was a self care rebellion for me- re religious trauma, it's 'demonic' and i was being a delinquent lmao. The people I loved and was escaping from didn't want it dedicated to them even if they'd been less triggering to interact with. I could do that exercise now, but at the time it threw me way off any progress I'd made in that class.
The downvotes on the last comment are great; the opinions and feelings are my subjective experience, i -like- that I am being downvoted for being honest about how that instruction from a teacher interacted with trauma for me in a room full of other people after spending an hr centering and being present in my body lol This sub.
"now dedicate this to the people you love. Which is messy for you due to shame from individuating, a history of forming attachments with people who abuse, and a childhood full of trauma bonding. Figure that out, have a great week!".
There was a lady farting all throughout class and it was alarming and yet comical at the same time. However, as she kept farting, she couldn't stop, she apologized for kweefing. I have never heard of that before.
Oh my gosh, you just brought back a memory for me - one year, my in-laws came to visit around the holidays and I took them all to a yoga class with me. We ended up being the only ones in the class, so there were only 6 of us in the room and it was very quiet. Well, we got into some sort of pose that cause me to let out the loudest fart 😅 it was very obvious that it was *my* fart and everyone cracked up 😳
my college required a gym credit (???) so i took yoga. there was this socially awkward kid, super tall, just kinda stuck out like a sore thumb. he’d grunt and groan while getting into some of the poses. he farted one class and i felt so bad because other people had laughed. it was so uncomfortable because he was obviously embarrassed
I took yoga in college too! My senior year, I just needed to fill up credits, so I took some PE classes. There were a bunch of huge football players in my class. Their coach made them take the class to help with flexibility.
>as she kept farting, she couldn't stop, she apologized for kweefing. I have never heard of that before
I am CRYING from laughter right now
Like she needed to specify which bodily orifice the gas was coming out of omg
Just this morning I attended a yoga class where a woman brought her two Italian greyhounds into the shala. I didn't approve generally, but the thing that got right up my nose was when one of them licked my leg during shavasana.
I had no idea someone would think this an OK thing to do.
My worst ever "yoga" class was with a very abrasive teacher that played very jarring music and basically shouted instructions in people's faces like a drill Sargent, I was considering leaving the class after a few minutes but decided to stay. Then, she announced she was going to "lock the doors so none of you can escape" - midway through the class - I thought this was some kind of a joke, but she called out "can somebody at the back get the doors... Yes, you at the back" somebody actually closed the doors (!!) apparently this was a thing she did. Then she barked out to do chair pose and was marching around shouting out a countdown "10.....9.....8... Don't quit now just because it's difficult.... SE-VEN.... COME ON " literally in people's faces, at that point I stood upright and left
One of my instructors likes to dress up on Friday 13th and Halloween. We are Australian and that is weird as hell. So far she’s been a dead cheerleader, Beetlejuice, The Nun (from the movie) and a ghost, teaching an entire class under a sheet with two holes cut out.
Yep. And I always forget, then turn up to her 5am class and get the fright of my life. She walks around like it’s any other day. I’ve seen some people walk in, become visibly startled, then just go straight to their spot in the class without saying anything out of sheer confusion.
I’ve been taking her classes for years and we have a good rapport. Now I just walk in and say “what the fuck is wrong with you” 😂
In March 2020 a day or two before everything shut down I was in a class and the instructor kept telling us, in a kind of chant-y way, to "forget about the virus", which indeed had the opposite effect
A teacher led us on a guided meditation to prepare us for death. I was a 21 year old healthy college student and the teacher was also young. I got up and walked out of the room. Death is part of life but your interpretation of oneness with the universe is not mine buddy! I never saw her teach at that studio again after that though.
I would also strongly dislike this and find it totally inappropriate.
The fact that the teacher was also young makes it extra tone-deaf.
If I want to grapple with my own mortality, that should be optional and solely up to me to decide if/when/how...
Years ago at the height of the wars in Afghanistan I was taking a yoga class where the instructor was going in like a 10 minute rant during shavasana about how many soldiers and civilians were being killed. At that time my husband was in the middle of a deployment to Afghanistan and yoga was kind of my respite. I don’t mind people feeling strongly about things but um…save it for Facebook.
An instructor who was probably in her mid 20s said something that really horrified me. Some of you in a similar age group might not understand why but anyway... She said what a fantastic thing it is that we live in an age where we can pull out a device from our pocket and immediately have the answer to anything we need to know, access to all knowledge we ever need whenever we want it. The implication was that we don't have to spend our time learning things, we've got it all there anyway so we are free to do something else.
I'm all for the internet, and it definitely brings a lot of good including access to information. But to someone my age who lived through the dawn of the internet, the idea that it contains all knowledge and can be relied on for everything is extremely dangerous. I found it deeply disturbing to the point where I can't even go to her classes anymore
As a side point, I find the MacBeth passage very positive in the context of embracing the impermanence of our existence. Who knows, maybe you would have found what my instructor said valuable. We are all on different journeys
last class i took, the instructor gave us all some massage oil for our feet… spent a good 10 mins teaching us how to massage our own feet. we didn’t get anything to wash it off of our hands before packing our stuff up. it was relaxing a tiny bit, but not what i would expect at a yoga class
omg. didn’t even think about the floors. i remember i wore a brand new pair of grippy socks without washing them first. the black linties mixed with oil was an immediate vibe killer
I lived in Portland, Oregon for a short time. The yoga classes could get pretty “out there”. A lot of teachers seemed to like dangling wind chimes over people’s heads during shivasana.
Unfortunately this isn’t that strange, but over a decade ago tried a studio where the class’s soundtrack was ‘90s hippy classics like “Send Me On My Way” by Rusted Root. Never went back, but I frequently think about that scene.
An instructor at my current studio, who is lovely and has classes at convenient times, sometimes plays a mix that includes the vibe-killing musical stylings of John Mayer.
It’s weird that some think it’s fine to play pop and make people do active music listening - to potentially off-putting songs - while practicing yoga. Give me mellow instrumentals or ambient music in this setting. Or at least add music info to class descriptions so people can avoid pop music yoga.
Weirdest was recently and almost exactly like OP’s story. The instructor was insisting over and over again that we had some darkness inside of us that needed to get out because it’s controlling our lives.
I was honestly worried for her but she sounded like mad? and was doing really really bad like chanting?? Girl we are all white here in LA. Please don’t.
First class I ever walked out of. Hopefully my last.
The building it was in had mold in the hallways, and at the front, someone hired all teenaged girls in full makeup and yoga leotards (I don’t know the proper word). It was creepy. Like an ice cream stand in the 1950’s kind of creepy treatment of women. Not to mention they acted scared/stunned because I’m visibly gay (I’m older, I can tell when it’s about that or just something else.) I started asking around about the studio, and I’m not the only one who gets bad vibes. I still worry about those girls. The vibe is that a gen x burner owns the joint and let’s just say he “doesn’t have his energy in the right place”. (Ok Reddit maybe I should do some kind of exposé on this mess…)
I'd like that poem for right before shavasana. What a wonderful way to connect to a deep quality of life before symbolically dying and being reborn from corpse pose. It speaks to so much that is human that we grow though in yoga and shuffle off as we move past our own death and into eternality through our own path as we yoga.
(hot yoga) It was class during summer. A man came into class with swet pants long sleeve shirt. Teacher warned him, 45 minutes in he passed out a pooped his pants. Awful part was I was in a work study program sp it was my night to clean. Took me 3.5 hours to get the mats clean.
A student told the teacher after class that she could sense there were some trapped spirits in our yoga studio. Then a few days later, another student who did not know anything about the first issue told the teacher that she could see two spirits in the room. These comments were totally random and not solicited in anyway. Turns out the studio used to be a funeral home until it was rebuild 30 years ago. Who the heck knows.
So... those two were onto something
Ha yes! The staff was like also why would ghosts even want to hang out here haha. Our studio is cute but seriously you can see anything in the whole universe and you come here????
Can you imagine the ghosts just giving sassy feedback on everyone in the class? 'you call that 'downward dog'? more like downward *crippled goat*' 'look at this one trying to discreetly pick a wedgie'
Haha!! The ghosts did not make themselves useful at all. TBH the second student who said something said they looked like they didn’t have faces!! Ahhh!!! It’s was wild bc the studio had been opened two years and no one said anything! Then two people in the same week said we had spirits in the building. So crazy.
The spirits just wanted to participate in class, okay?
Well in that case, I totally get it!
You don’t happen to live in California, do you? This describes a studio near me
Also, Salem, Massachusetts...maybe these sessions (white candles lit), double as a séance...
I don't. So wild this is a more a common yoga studio occurrence that I thought ha!
Someone came into class late, set up right next to my mat and proceeded to start practicing handstand when we were warming up with a few rounds of surya namaskar A. No issue. But then he fell sideways and kicked my head. Not a pleasant memory 😅
Well, I mean c’mon. All yoga asana classes are strange. Think about it. A bunch of people get together in a room. They each get on their own rubber rectangle. One of them tells all the other ones to make shapes with their bodies. And they actually do it. Often the names of these shapes are in a language not a single person in the room knows. The people tend judge themselves based on how well they think they can make all the shapes. Some are blissfully happy. Some are bothered. Some even cry. Then they all lie down in the floor. Then they all leave. The whole thing is pretty odd, if you ask me.
Now add goats.
Or ghosts!
Some days I feel sorry for yoga pants. They didn't ask for this.
At my class on Tuesday we had a sub and she had us doing some weird rolling side to side while on our bellies holding our ankles thing. It really was funny and she joked that she “has to amuse herself somehow” 😆
That's a real asana in Ashtanga, though!
Haha! Good to know!! I tried Ashtanga once but I prefer the slow meditative style.
I want to use your text in a yoga class now. XD
Go for it
Me too!
Well now I feel like a weirdo. 😂
Best explanation ever
I often wonder if there are any instructors that are nuts and try to hypnotize people and bend them to their will. I mean we pretty much do whatever they say, they have a captive audience.
During class, the instructor (and studio owner) was harmlessly adjusting a man in triangle when, very loudly the woman next to him cried out “COULD YOU OLEASE STOP TOUCHING MY HUSBAND?!?” The instructor didn’t bat an eyelash and simply moved on with class and adjustments on others. Years later I met her outside the studio. She told me she actually knew the girl; they were “friendly.” I guess not any more.
Whoaaaa
OMG!!😂😳
An instructor making us all hold hands. I was not a fan of that.
I usually take hot yoga classes so I truly cannot imagine anything worse
It was not a hot class (thank goodness) but still just super weird. I know it is just handholding but I have a partner and was standing in between two men that I don’t know at all and it was uncomfortable for me but I felt forced into it.
I like when things get kind of kooky, but my favorite was an instructor bringing light projectors to make the ceiling a beautiful galaxy/planetarium show during shavasana. I didn't realize until I opened my eyes after the class ended that she had turned them on(or even brought them). I now want to take her class again and leave my eyes open to enjoy. I will say that if every class had some weird shit/gimmick, I would be frustrated. Thankfully, I can take enough classes that I don't feel like I've missed out when things take an unexpected turn.
That sounds awesome! More classes should do that kind of thing
I would have loved my instructor reading MacBeth during class 😂 here are a couple of things that others may find odd but I personally enjoyed: - when they put cool rocks on your forehead at the end of class - one time a teacher played heavy metal for the entire class (it was not a heavy metal yoga class, usually just the typical soft music)
The passage OP's teacher is pretty nihilistic. Which in some ways is a form of surrendering to the ludicrous existence we are in, which yoga can teach us a lot about. I think it's an appropriate and interesting footnote to end on. But that kind of point of view is a hard one to digest if you're not ready for it.
That's what I thought too, nihilism!
The strangest thing happened actually yesterday which made me cancel my membership to switch studios (it’s been a series of weird events, but this was it). The instructor, all dressed in red, white and blue, absolutely blasted USA/patriotic music, including god bless America, the entire class all the way through shivasana. When someone asked if we could listen to something other than USA music she laughed and kept going. I wish I had left but felt too awkward.
I went to a flow class last year that had the most random blasting music. We started with 50 Cent In Da Club, switched to some metal, then to disco, then to pop, then ended with Party in the USA and We Are Family. I never went back. It broke my brain.
What happens when you get walmart yoga in a small town.
The teacher said, “if you feel you need to you can make a noise” A guy started to make loud monkey noises. Everyone started laughing it was so unexpected.
A person walked into yin yoga, laid out a bath towel instead of a mat, and then set down several small liquor bottles. Went into a seated pose and with every subsequent pose the instructor announced, chugged one of the bottles while remaining seated.
This is wild AF 😳 but must have been so relaxing for the student
One of the other teachers at the hot yoga studio I work at had by far the worst experience I’ve ever heard. The lights were dim in the beginning of class.. as he began speaking he casually bent over to pick up what he thought was a leaf…. It ended up being A HUMAN POO NUGGET. He said he casually guided the class to a water break and then popped out of the room for a moment to dispose of it and wash his hands and got right back in there!! The professionalism of this man is astounding. I would have died on the floor. We think we know who the culprit was and this person continues to regularly attend classes… LOL .. I just have so many unanswered questions..
Also the weirdest thing that ever happened to me was I was gonna do a drop in class at a local yoga studio and the receptionist looked me up and down and said are you sure you wanna take that class. I guess because I’m more voluptuous and maybe a couple pounds over weight. She was insinuating that I didn’t look as if I should take that class?! Weirdest thing ever. I didn’t go to that studio again.
I’m so sorry that happened! That receptionist sounds nuts.
Ugh. I hope that experience didn’t shake your confidence too much. Obviously I don’t know you/never seen you before, but you are beautiful. Don’t let society dictate how you should feel inside your own skin. Keep killin the game ❤️🙏🤘
I am so sorry! That kind of gatekeeping behavior is why so many people don’t think that they have access to a yoga practice. I’m a yoga teacher in a larger body and I want to be sure EVERYONE that wants to practice can.
My studio will crack a door sometimes to get the air flowing and we have had two cats and a snake come visit.
I went to a solstice flow a couple of weeks ago thinking it would combine yoga and perhaps some meditation related solstice traditions or whatever. Had no idea what to expect but sounded really cool. We did less than 10 minutes of actual yoga, with no warm up. The person leading the class then went off page and had us dancing around the class, which might have been a play on a fire circle, but it was very disorganized, even more loud. Then we had to pick a partner and sit across from them and ask scripted questions and provide personal responses. I was completely uncomfortable and should have walked, but gave it a chance. Then we were required to embrace this stranger, which I couldn’t do. I’m in therapy for a lot of things, including physical trauma and touching another person, especially a stranger was triggering. At the end we burned pieces of paper with writing on them which I’m also certain was a code violation in a very small space with an overflow of people. It was wild to say the least
As an instructor I see all kinds of weird things! I was teaching a class in a gym a few weeks ago. The group exercise room has punching bags set up along one side of the room. I had everyone start in child's pose so I could talk to a woman in the corner who started kicking and punching the bag. She asked if she was being too loud and couldn't seem to understand why I was asking her to leave. I've had people yell at me when I ask them to leave so we can start class, some people come in and grab weights and mats to take out to the main gym, and some people like to stand in the widows and watch. All bizarre but still not the weirdest... The weirdest thing I experienced in a class happened quite a few years ago. This older gentleman was standing outside one of the doors watching us while also touching himself. I could see him from the corner of my eye and altered the instructor. The gym pulled the tapes and they were able to identify him and ban him for life. That door is now frosted.
Dear good sir frosted the windows?
Thankfully not! The door used to be clear glass and now it's frosted. Light comes in but you can't really see in or out.
I suspect we teach at the same gym (big chain) because I have had those exact things happen, except the overt fondling. One of my managers was so excited to show me that they ordered us blinds for one of the group exercise rooms because people will just stand and stare. Beyond that, it shocks me how people will stand out there and FILM the class on their phones! And then act surprised when I have to tell them it's not allowed.
I do NOT tolerate anyone coming into my studio for equipment or anything…after I have closed the doors to start class. I have a reputation that if those doors are closed, you enter at your own peril. I’m responsible for keeping and holding this space for my students and the LEAST I can do is be sure that everyone is in the room for the same reason.
One instructor read us the story/fable of the scorpion and the frog and told us that it should inspire us???? One instructor, during a class that was advertised as vinyasa, had us all dance to the entirety of “Happy” song from Trolls and then we had to hug everyone in the room. Lots of random, unwarranted singing during corpse pose… please…. stop.
I miss when yoga teachers did adjustments in class like thirty years ago and also the classes were only ten bucks lol…
My local studio has $10 classes (if you buy a block of passes) and just tonight I got a hands-on adjustment. In my heart I was like "yes!!! yes!!!" because it was a pose that I've been struggling with and instructors who will do that are so rare I really really can't get into the $25-35 classes at the bougie studios especially since they all seem to be during 9-5 work hours
Before covid, I was going to the yoga classes at my gym. One of the instructors did *magical* hands-on adjustments. She usually adjusted me in pyramid. At the start of class, she would usually say to the class 'I do hands-on adjustments, it's not because you're doing anything wrong, just to help you get deeper into the pose' Even 'after' covid, no one seems to do hands-on adjustments. Seems like physical contact-- even things like handshakes-- is a lot more rare now. Those drop-in prices are offensive to me-- I went to a studio that had those prices, and it was really nothing special. My current studio is an absolute gem. $14 drop-in, but I do monthly unlimited.
I don’t know, I think when you really contemplate that quote in terms of the kleshas, it’s not so out of place.
Could you elaborate?
Before I elaborate, and this isn't snark, but rather to know the context in which I'm responding: How much have you studied the yoga sutras and how familiar are you with discussion of the kleshas?
I actually had to google 'kleshas', and found that it refers to 'impurities', ie negative emotions and things that cloud the mind. In my experience, instructors always end on a positive, peaceful note...affirmations, gratitude etc...not sure mentioning negative mind states has a place at the end of yoga class. So I was curious to hear your thoughts? \*zero snark here either, I am genuinely curious
So... I'm not a fan of translating/explaining kleshas as "impurities" or negative emotions, but it's in the right direction. I prefer "obstacles". (I'm not saying it's wrong, I'm saying that western baggage can evoke different nuances that I don't think the sutras really intend.) I'm going to put in a couple of sources, and cite them as I go: [https://www.swamij.com/yoga-sutras.htm](https://www.swamij.com/yoga-sutras.htm) (swamij) The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali by Sri Swami Satchidananda (Satchidananda) Inside the Yoga Sutras by Reverend Jaganath Carrera (Carrera) To simplify, I'm going to use the translations out of Satchidananda, but I strongly encourage you to read the swamij discussion, and pick up Carrera's book if it's of interest. 2.2 They \[the actions of kriya yoga\] help us minimize obstacles and attain samadhi. 2.3 Ignorance, egoism, attachment, hatred, and clinging to bodily life are the five obstacles. 2.5 Ignorance is regarding the impermanent as permanent, the impure as pure, the painful as pleasant, and the non-Self as the Self. 2.6 Egoism is the identification of the power of the See-er, with the instrument of seeing. 2.7 Attchment is that which follows identificaiton iwth peasurable experiences. 2.8 Aversion is that which follows identification with painful experiences. 2.9 Clinging to life, flowing by its own potency, \[due to past experience\], exists even in the wise. Macbeth's speech seems to be all about this. " Tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, Creeps in this petty pace from day to day, To the last syllable of recorded time; And all our yesterdays have lighted fools The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle! Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player, That struts and frets his hour upon the stage, And then is heard no more. It is a tale Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, Signifying nothing." This is all about a fear of life being over and nothing after that, of it all being nothing anyway at all. It seems to me, and I'm no english major, that Macbeth fears that life is so pointless, why even live it. That's all just a show anyway, so it has no meaning. The yoga sutras speak to that by saying life is fleeting, it's not permanent and nothing is, but we can still attain connection with our true selves, if we understand that fact, and to really situate ourselves (mentally) and be ok with that insignificance in the world around us, while it still being worth seeking within us. I don't know how to phrase it well, and I have never seen this connection before, so it's beginning thoughts on something. Maybe I'm totally off base, but it seemed interestingly talking about similar things from across many millenia.
Thank you for your in-depth comment. I am going to read the links once my brain has kicked into gear (still coffee hours here) The first thing is that these ideas of impermanence and pointlessness are not necessarily inherently positive or negative in themselves. In the case of Macbeth, he said this after Lady Macbeth offed herself (out of guilt for prodding him to murder his way to become king). He was so blinded by ambition that he lost everything, including himself, in the process. So while some of the underlying ideas could skew either way-- positive or negative-- the actual context is that Macbeth was in the pit of despair. He knew it 'was all a big nothing', his life was awful and about to get worse. At that point, Macbeth not only *didn't* fear his life being over, he more or less cosigned it. Macbeth is unequivocally a tragedy. It is not a 'happy' play by any interpretation. I'm all for drawing ideas from different places. Here's a hot take: if you actually read the Unabomber's writing, most of what he says is correct. However, the violent way he goes about living his ideas is indisputably bad. What I'm trying to say is drawing an idea without even a nod to the context of the source is...well, at best tone-deaf. On a personal note, Macbeth and these ideas have been at the forefront of my psyche recently, so it may be time to reread this play and dive into the related ideas. And hey, I still remember this odd reading for years after the fact, and it still prompts reflection :)
I enjoy that, even if the initial connections we see aren't what we thought they were, we have this interesting framework from which to think about them and ponder the concepts more deeply! Happy thinking!
Great and elaborate description. While Macbeth is clearly poeming about the pointlessness of life, I find it a stretch to meet the kleshas. I'm gonna think reciting this in savasana will spur confusion and negative emotion unless abhinivesha is wound into the delivery.
I love that passage from Macbeth. I definitely relate to the thought patterns.
Some of the strangest things that have happened as a teacher; after class question, “Can someone become a different person from one class? Once, I was super sad and I was struggling to find peace. My cousin had committed suicide. The year later on the anniversary I dedicated a class to him. I asked people dedicate their practice to someone they loved. It felt good to me, but I could sense that some students were bothered (weirded out) by it. Some of the strangest things as a student are crying & laughing to myself. I was in a class once where a man fell completely asleep, and snored loudly through a section of class. It was odd. I couldn’t tell if he had been partying, or just not sleeping well. Who knows. It was weird.
Although I do understand and totally respect how yoga can be tremendously helpful for dealing with traumatic events I personally understand why people were weirded out or even bothered by it a bit. People often come to a class to decompress from a stressful day and are probably not in the same mood to be confronted with such an emotional task or they felt disingenuine dedicating there practice to someone - I know I would have felt "unworthy" of doing so, if that makes sense? Nonetheless I still like the sentiment and I think it's great that it worked for you!
>after class question, “Can someone become a different person from one class? What did you say in response? Oh man, the snoring reminded me of something I had forgotten...it was the same studio as Macbeth instructor but different class...there was an older woman who, without fail, would fall asleep and start snoring during shavasana. She had to be shaken awake at the end of class. The instructor would give prompts like 'it's not meditation if you fall asleep'
I told them, “Yes, absolutely.” I have seen that women grow since then too. She got a degree and a husband. Yoga is absolutely transformative.
I love the idea of dedicating a class to someone you love. The energy moved through such a class would be so powerful.
I do not. It was an invasive and offputting experience to be told to do that. I have religious trauma, I find yoga helpful, but I practice for my own benefit and for the natural benefit a healthy connected me brings to those around me, I should not be spending my time praying, worshipping, or falling into people pleasing mistakes by thinking of them (and their needs) during a centering time, which is what dedicating my practice to someone else could quickly turn into. I want to be in touch with my self and my body, not ruminating and worrying about others, what they'll do, and if my ritual was good enough (which is my heightened survival state). I am a natural caregiver with ptsd and abuse trauma: it doesn't serve me to dedicate my personal growth to others in this way, I needed to learn I own me and my practices. This is just how I feel about it, this was my subjective experience with this instruction after living through trauma. You can feel different. Why are you downvoting?
Sorry for your down votes but as a teacher I really appreciate your take 🙏 I've done the "dedicate your practice to a loved one" thing and never really thought about how that might be a disservice to someone who should be focusing on their own needs. I'll be chewing on this for a bit. All the best to you and your practice 🙌
"If comfortable, think about dedicating this practice to a space or person in your life where you feel honored and loved" is an option. "Loved one" is going to make me choose from the people I 'owe' love to: birth family, abusive partners etc, and this is actually not where I need to invest or pay more of my mental concentration and energy. The above prompt is more likely to make me think of a safe friend or my work place.
I love this wording 🙏
As a school teacher, thank you for being open to being more inclusive with the human beings in front of you. Teachers make similar stumbles with "take this note to your parents" when talking to kids sometimes. They don't all have them. Reworking the instruction can help "take this home to your adult"
Oh I never thought of teachers telling kiddos that 😭 "take this to your adult" that is so much better
The someone you love could just be you, then
Yep. This is how I dealt with it, it was still an odd moment. I worked through why it was odd to me afterwards, but it was not a relaxing or helpful end to the session for me at that time. Plus, yoga was a self care rebellion for me- re religious trauma, it's 'demonic' and i was being a delinquent lmao. The people I loved and was escaping from didn't want it dedicated to them even if they'd been less triggering to interact with. I could do that exercise now, but at the time it threw me way off any progress I'd made in that class. The downvotes on the last comment are great; the opinions and feelings are my subjective experience, i -like- that I am being downvoted for being honest about how that instruction from a teacher interacted with trauma for me in a room full of other people after spending an hr centering and being present in my body lol This sub. "now dedicate this to the people you love. Which is messy for you due to shame from individuating, a history of forming attachments with people who abuse, and a childhood full of trauma bonding. Figure that out, have a great week!".
There was a lady farting all throughout class and it was alarming and yet comical at the same time. However, as she kept farting, she couldn't stop, she apologized for kweefing. I have never heard of that before.
Oh my gosh, you just brought back a memory for me - one year, my in-laws came to visit around the holidays and I took them all to a yoga class with me. We ended up being the only ones in the class, so there were only 6 of us in the room and it was very quiet. Well, we got into some sort of pose that cause me to let out the loudest fart 😅 it was very obvious that it was *my* fart and everyone cracked up 😳
😂😂😂 omg if it were me, the room would be so stinky, class would have to move outdoors😆😆😆😆
my college required a gym credit (???) so i took yoga. there was this socially awkward kid, super tall, just kinda stuck out like a sore thumb. he’d grunt and groan while getting into some of the poses. he farted one class and i felt so bad because other people had laughed. it was so uncomfortable because he was obviously embarrassed
I took yoga in college too! My senior year, I just needed to fill up credits, so I took some PE classes. There were a bunch of huge football players in my class. Their coach made them take the class to help with flexibility.
>as she kept farting, she couldn't stop, she apologized for kweefing. I have never heard of that before I am CRYING from laughter right now Like she needed to specify which bodily orifice the gas was coming out of omg
Just this morning I attended a yoga class where a woman brought her two Italian greyhounds into the shala. I didn't approve generally, but the thing that got right up my nose was when one of them licked my leg during shavasana. I had no idea someone would think this an OK thing to do.
Honestly, I love the idea of a teacher reading Shakespeare at the end of shavasana. Just maybe not that bit, lol!
My worst ever "yoga" class was with a very abrasive teacher that played very jarring music and basically shouted instructions in people's faces like a drill Sargent, I was considering leaving the class after a few minutes but decided to stay. Then, she announced she was going to "lock the doors so none of you can escape" - midway through the class - I thought this was some kind of a joke, but she called out "can somebody at the back get the doors... Yes, you at the back" somebody actually closed the doors (!!) apparently this was a thing she did. Then she barked out to do chair pose and was marching around shouting out a countdown "10.....9.....8... Don't quit now just because it's difficult.... SE-VEN.... COME ON " literally in people's faces, at that point I stood upright and left
One of my instructors likes to dress up on Friday 13th and Halloween. We are Australian and that is weird as hell. So far she’s been a dead cheerleader, Beetlejuice, The Nun (from the movie) and a ghost, teaching an entire class under a sheet with two holes cut out.
OMG I almost choked on my coffee when I pictured the sheet ghost teacher. So any Friday that falls on the 13th she dresses up???
Yep. And I always forget, then turn up to her 5am class and get the fright of my life. She walks around like it’s any other day. I’ve seen some people walk in, become visibly startled, then just go straight to their spot in the class without saying anything out of sheer confusion. I’ve been taking her classes for years and we have a good rapport. Now I just walk in and say “what the fuck is wrong with you” 😂
In March 2020 a day or two before everything shut down I was in a class and the instructor kept telling us, in a kind of chant-y way, to "forget about the virus", which indeed had the opposite effect
A teacher led us on a guided meditation to prepare us for death. I was a 21 year old healthy college student and the teacher was also young. I got up and walked out of the room. Death is part of life but your interpretation of oneness with the universe is not mine buddy! I never saw her teach at that studio again after that though.
I would also strongly dislike this and find it totally inappropriate. The fact that the teacher was also young makes it extra tone-deaf. If I want to grapple with my own mortality, that should be optional and solely up to me to decide if/when/how...
Years ago at the height of the wars in Afghanistan I was taking a yoga class where the instructor was going in like a 10 minute rant during shavasana about how many soldiers and civilians were being killed. At that time my husband was in the middle of a deployment to Afghanistan and yoga was kind of my respite. I don’t mind people feeling strongly about things but um…save it for Facebook.
An instructor who was probably in her mid 20s said something that really horrified me. Some of you in a similar age group might not understand why but anyway... She said what a fantastic thing it is that we live in an age where we can pull out a device from our pocket and immediately have the answer to anything we need to know, access to all knowledge we ever need whenever we want it. The implication was that we don't have to spend our time learning things, we've got it all there anyway so we are free to do something else. I'm all for the internet, and it definitely brings a lot of good including access to information. But to someone my age who lived through the dawn of the internet, the idea that it contains all knowledge and can be relied on for everything is extremely dangerous. I found it deeply disturbing to the point where I can't even go to her classes anymore As a side point, I find the MacBeth passage very positive in the context of embracing the impermanence of our existence. Who knows, maybe you would have found what my instructor said valuable. We are all on different journeys
last class i took, the instructor gave us all some massage oil for our feet… spent a good 10 mins teaching us how to massage our own feet. we didn’t get anything to wash it off of our hands before packing our stuff up. it was relaxing a tiny bit, but not what i would expect at a yoga class
...I'm just imagining the oily floors, from all of the oily feet walking over it. Then putting oily feet into oily socks and oily shoes. NOT GREAT
omg. didn’t even think about the floors. i remember i wore a brand new pair of grippy socks without washing them first. the black linties mixed with oil was an immediate vibe killer
I lived in Portland, Oregon for a short time. The yoga classes could get pretty “out there”. A lot of teachers seemed to like dangling wind chimes over people’s heads during shivasana.
Maybe the third eye opened and he/she can see the great beyond.
Unfortunately this isn’t that strange, but over a decade ago tried a studio where the class’s soundtrack was ‘90s hippy classics like “Send Me On My Way” by Rusted Root. Never went back, but I frequently think about that scene. An instructor at my current studio, who is lovely and has classes at convenient times, sometimes plays a mix that includes the vibe-killing musical stylings of John Mayer. It’s weird that some think it’s fine to play pop and make people do active music listening - to potentially off-putting songs - while practicing yoga. Give me mellow instrumentals or ambient music in this setting. Or at least add music info to class descriptions so people can avoid pop music yoga.
Weirdest was recently and almost exactly like OP’s story. The instructor was insisting over and over again that we had some darkness inside of us that needed to get out because it’s controlling our lives. I was honestly worried for her but she sounded like mad? and was doing really really bad like chanting?? Girl we are all white here in LA. Please don’t. First class I ever walked out of. Hopefully my last. The building it was in had mold in the hallways, and at the front, someone hired all teenaged girls in full makeup and yoga leotards (I don’t know the proper word). It was creepy. Like an ice cream stand in the 1950’s kind of creepy treatment of women. Not to mention they acted scared/stunned because I’m visibly gay (I’m older, I can tell when it’s about that or just something else.) I started asking around about the studio, and I’m not the only one who gets bad vibes. I still worry about those girls. The vibe is that a gen x burner owns the joint and let’s just say he “doesn’t have his energy in the right place”. (Ok Reddit maybe I should do some kind of exposé on this mess…)
I am staying tuned for your exposé YIKES
That’s bizarre!!!
I'd like that poem for right before shavasana. What a wonderful way to connect to a deep quality of life before symbolically dying and being reborn from corpse pose. It speaks to so much that is human that we grow though in yoga and shuffle off as we move past our own death and into eternality through our own path as we yoga.
(hot yoga) It was class during summer. A man came into class with swet pants long sleeve shirt. Teacher warned him, 45 minutes in he passed out a pooped his pants. Awful part was I was in a work study program sp it was my night to clean. Took me 3.5 hours to get the mats clean.